Shawn XYZ Beast

This person has Assburgers Syndrome,
so you can't say anything bad! :-(

Be aware of that, you insensitive fuck.

	“	perverted? EXTREMELY	„
	— Shawn.

Shawn Burress (born June 10 1998), or rather his more cheesier name Shawn XYZ Beast, is a pervert and a poor excuse for a Pokemon competitive battler. His current occupation is masturbating to porn in bed. Starting as a kid with absolutely no life, at the age of 8 in 2007, Shawn got into watching little demon girls strip in a child porn website. He claims himself that he finds stalking young girls a pleasure at nighttime, as well as going to the girl's bathroom deliberately in school hours. In August 2014, Shawn XYZ Beast was nominated and won for Academy Award for World's Perfect Examples of Pedophiles for his performance as stalking many 12 year old girls on Halloween night in October 2013. He received two Grammy Rewards for an mp3 of himself moaning like a little girl in bed.

Attempting to follow the success of his great grandmother Shawna "Ni Hao Kai Lan" Hitler who was a legendary stripper, Shawn decided to become a male stripper in 2012. Unfortunately, he was rejected because his cock was too ugly.

No words can describe this young boy who claims to be 16 years old, got laid, and bisexual when he says he's gay or even straight depending on who he talks to. At times, he will attempt to make jokes, but they aren't funny at all. He will even act smart, but overtime, he will get caught in his own trap. Overall, he's an asshole and a big liar.

Shawn is currently masturbating to hentai.

Nice hair. I wonder how much dandruff's on there.

Facebook

Oh dear, where to start. Well, you'll find Shawn in his Facebook sharing pointless and fairly odd photos that usually don't make sense. On occasion, he'll flirt with people and attempt have them as his girlfriend.

Skype

In a scenario where you would have him as a Skype contact, at times when you're offline, he would link you random hentai and/or porn. That way, he assumes that you would find the provided image sexy, in which, according to a survey provided by www.surveysforfags.com 100% of people dislike his most recent actions. His questions are also quite repetitive.

	“	so, i got laid for the first time in months... doesn't feel like it used to! oh well, if any juan wanna battle, message me, i'm free usually, and mo masturbating on cam gaw damn it >:d last time that happend, its like gen 5, we don't speak of it!	„
	— One of Shawn's moods on Skype.

From August 20, 2013 til August 24 2014, Shawn has committed 7,205 actions to people in and out of the Internet that would classify him as a dumbass. 3,189 actions have been committed to various classes of an Internet Asshole.

deviantArt

Although mainly recognized as a devaintArt user, Shawn XYZ Beast's actions apply to Facebook as well, only difference is that he is actually a pixel artist, but unfortunately for him, his skill on that is on the same fate as Cheeyev. Well, too fucking bad for him. His sprites are just, eww. Here is also one of his many bullshit journals he has posted on deviantArt. Though no relevant, he is probably masturbating to this ad right next to this text.

Looking over most of Shawn's works, one pixel artist was "struck by the nastiness and disgusting efforts put into Burress's works," and how "radically different style than other pixel artists, in a bad way."

One of his unfortunate creations, Ninchick.

YouTube

Yet again, Shawn has demonstrated more good examples of how exactly just stupid he can just get, just on YouTube this time around. As far as his personality swings go from suicidal to extremely gullible, of course he just had to make an account. In this day, he has 3 subscribers.

Here is an unfortunate case of one of his videos that nobody really cares about.

Exgirlfriends

Although a lot of Shawn XYZ Beast's girlfriends tend to be whores, it is currently unknown who specifically has dated this loner. One of those sluts would go by the name Katrina Florence. Both have had their past, even both have been so stupid up to the point they shared dirty photos via Facebook. Let's not forget about this twerking bitch that goes by the all intelligent code name Sucka Hoe, has also had a relationship with this sick fuck known as our favorite pervert, Shawn.

#TwerkCrew! Actually, Shawn claims these young ladies are his girlfriends. You guessed it, one of them is Sucka Hoe.

Nicknames

Despite how the amount of lies he's been giving away to his so called friends, he has various nicknames he would like to be called, just so he can express his stupidity into even farther levels. Some people prefer just one or two, which is understandable, however, Shawn likes to be called an extreme variety of these names down below, despite how many people refer to him as Shawn and only Shawn. Beware of the cheesiness levels over here. If you don't like cheesy, stay away.

Shawn XYZ Beast; It's cheesy, I'm telling ya. Hey, why not sing the ABC's? Oh wait, A-W doesn't exist in Shawn's dictionary.
King Infernape; Infernape is a Pokemon. So you're king of Infernapes? Cool, cool. Cheesy.
Shawn OmegA; A reword of his name. Could be a reference to the newest Pokemon games that will come out. We never know.
King Inferno XyZ; According to logical assumptions, we can assume that Inferno came from Infernape and the most cheesiest part of the nickname, Xyz, came from the first nickname from above. Surprise, surprise.
There is a lot more ridiculous names where that came from. Ask Shawn himself if you don't find any of these names satisfying to call him as.

His sexuality quest

Hmm... Quite a similarity...

Over the past year, Shawn has decided to go on quest to find out his sexuality. He has lied numerous times about it to different people, including that he was straight, bisexual, gay, and pansexual. It should be clear by now that he has no idea what gender he is attracted to, and that maybe he's not 16 years-old. He has also asked in the past to other guys if they wanted to be his boyfriend, due to the sole fact Shawn Burress is lonely, is not going to school, has an obsession with hentai, and really wants to get down and dirty with other men secretly. He also may have a love for furries, as he is in his room all day doing nothing but playing games, jacking his penis to something he can find, specifically some games, while doing a poor job at hiding his secrets about his personal interests about what he likes.

Shawn's guide to conversation starters

	“	WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKKKKKE UP!!!\ DUUUUDE i got access to my SD	„

	“	Okay... BATTLE ME BITCH! jk Video chat? bruh bruuuh BRRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUOGFSDJBVGKBISBGJKSDHFDF! SDGHILSDRJKGLHBVGERKAJV ERAHBVFERAUIERHGIERHG9ERHIERBGERVGRHUIHJ FTGHRBGUAEH ]RTGHGHER GHTR HBTRDBHJBH DETRH 'FNNHJ GFTRn TR JKQ ymnd jns n adf nb er] \h jtr sdf' 'wet A MH JKTYHJ FG JRYJE' T' YJ T im done now brruuuuuuuuuuuuuuu---	„
	— And so on... ._.