User:Austrotung/Mark

{{watch}}

Venetian Blind is '''Mark David Provance''' aka '''Stacy Vance Jr.''' aka '''Rice Hornet''' aka '''Rocky Raven'''

[[Image:A-hole.jpg]]

== Say "Cheese" ==
[[Image:swcheese.jpg]]

Hey kids! Ask Mom and Dad to print this page out so you can color the cheese. Pick a pretty color. I recommend green with a bit of gray.


[[User:Kick Shitter|Kick Shitter]] 18:56, 25 February 2011 (UTC)

'''The cheese stands alone.'''

== Energy for Dummies ==
[[Image:Mark_af.jpg|thumb|When Mark lost his audition for the Andy Griffith Show to Ron Howard, he joined the air force since all the other branches were 'too hard'.]]

[[Image:Mark_bff.jpg|thumb|Mark's BBF, Kevin's biological father, Charles H. Garrison III]]

'''Kinetic energy''' - The kinetic energy of an object is the energy it possesses because of its motion.
 
'''Potential energy''' - The energy which a body possesses as a consequence of its position in the field of gravity.

[[Image:Energy.jpg]]

 {{quote|A bicycle in motion should never concern a living, sentient entity. It is discernible and self-evident. Rather, the bicycle that waits to run your ass down is another matter.|- Melvin J. Flemingworth, Ph.D, University of Fabricology}}

Beware of [[trolls|'''potential energy''']]. It's a bitch!
[[User:Kick Shitter|Kick Shitter]] 00:06, 3 March 2011 (UTC)


== Art Collection ==
[[Image:Mark_hippie.jpg|thumb|Mark in his 'I really want to be John Lennon phase. Mark David Chapman shot the wrong one.  Wait.  Mark David Provance, Mark David Chapman.  CREEPY!]]

I've decided to invest in art. It's been said that if you invest in a promising young artist early in his career, it can pay off in the long run. What do you think?


[[User:Kick Shitter|Kick Shitter]] 09:05, 5 March 2011 (UTC)


== Looking for a Few Lost Relatives ==

[[Image:Asshole_art.jpg]]

[[User:Kick Shitter|Kick Shitter]] 17:34, 5 March 2011 (UTC)


==For the record==
The user Venetian Blind who seems laboriously obsessed with all things Kevin is - yet again - his deranged uncle Mark David Provance.  Here is why Mark is back.  I received this information from Kevin first hand and viewed court documents that backs it up: Mark tried in February to take Kevin to court for 'domestic violence'.  Mark, not being the brightest bulb on the planet did not know that in order to ask for a restraining order for domestic abuse, he and Kevin had to be living together for any given period of time.  Instead, Mark filed a 40+ page document in which he cried and screamed butthurt by all the information posted about him on ED and others internet sites, some of which Kevin was not responsible for.  This is how paranoid and obsessed Kevin's uncle is.  Mark, so butthurt from Kevin pwning him at every turn actually attempted to abuse the court system in an attempt to get even, and lost, badly.  When Mark and Kevin finally faced off in the courtroom, the judge wasted no time in handing Mark his ass.  Mark's stupid and clueless lawyer apparently did not even take the time to explain to Mark that domestic violence did not apply in the matter.  One can only surmise that the lawyer wanted Mark's $300.00 dollars, knowing Mark was going to lose.  Mark claimed Kevin at some point posted on the Internet Mark engaged in "a homosexual relationship with his boss [who was rumored to be gay] and contracted STD which he then passed on to his daughter in an incestuous relationship."  Really Mark?  You would actually admit to something like that in a court room?  I cannot WAIT to see the transcript!  Mark's butthurt flared up even more when he complained about all the paged posted about him on ED.  Mark never mentioned he started those attacks first and that Kevin was merely reciprocating.  A little one sided, don't you think Davey boy?  The judge in his infinite wisdom dismissed the case.  Now, here is the funny part: Mark was so desperate to get even with Kevin, after the judge made his ruling, Mark had his lawyer interrupt the judge with the ludicrous claim that Mark and Kevin lived together for four days.  The truth as it was explained to me by Kevin is that Mark must have been referring to the time Mark was a guest at his sister's house - where Kevin lived at the time, in Florida 18 YEARS prior (no, srsly!) as a basis for his false claim.  Yeah, nice try Mark.  The judge ignored you a second time.

In summary, little Mark, crying from butthurt that he caused himself attempted to abuse the legal system to get even with his nephew Kevin, and lost.  Mark ended up paying court costs and the cost of a lawyer for what?  Nothing!  If that is not epic fail, I don't know what is.  So now Mark is back under yet another weak sockpuppet account feeding more silliness to his nephew's page.  It's all he can do, you see.  He's too much of a pussy to do anything else.  He'll forever hide behind his computer, spending endless hours and all his gubment money obsessing over his nephew, who wants nothing to do with him (oh yeah, Mark lives on disability after doctor shopping and filing false claims.  He's too lazy to work, much less get off his fat pussy ass to make these statements to anyone face to face.  I challenged him to do so, he did not answer.  Pussified little bitch he is.)  A 58 year old man with no life, no family and a fattie he'd like to fuck if he could only get his pudgy little dick up fills his days obsessing over his nephew's life, a life he wished he could have.  So he takes to this page, again, and trashes that life.  If Mark can't have it, why should anyone else?  What did Charlie Sheen say about that?  People hate over what they are jealous of and cannot have?

And now you know who Venetian Blind (Kick Shitter's former account) is and why he is here.

[[User:Winning R|Winning R]] 17:42, 8 March 2011 (UTC)

==O' Brother, where art thou?==
I have it on good authority who paid for your nephew's legal defense.  It wasn't your sister.  Figure it out, Mr. Provance.  I can play this game too. [[User:Winning R|Winning R]] 18:00, 8 March 2011 (UTC)

==#LOSING==
06:03, 10 March 2011, Challenger (Talk | Contribs) ræped #130185 (expires 06:03, 11 March 2011, account creation blocked) (Autoblocked because your IP address has been recently used by "Venetian Blind". The reason given for Venetian Blind's block is: "[[sockpuppetwankery]]")

How many times is that today? 10? 20? I lost count. #EPICFAIL
[[User:Winning R|Winning R]] 06:15, 10 March 2011 (UTC)

==Sockpuppetry==
Mark is back?  [[User:Shitzon|Shitzon?]]  Appropriate name.

==As Stacy Vance Jr.==
[[Image:Fel2.jpg|thumb|Mark bred and gave the world 'LaRue'.]]  Thanks for nothing.]
Mark, thinking he passes as a singer/songwriter decided early in 2000 to make a CD of original material.  Obviously it was a complete flop.  [http://www.betarecords.com/stacy.vance.jr I invite you to judge for yourself.]  I think you'll agree he sounds like an emaciated dog who has his balls stung up by piano wire.  Also enjoy the duet with LaRue, who is reality is his [[User:Felicia|special needs daughter, Felicia.]] Her performance is also not very noteworthy (it must have something to do with her [http://www.backstreet.net/www.cgi?x=showitems&d=fanreviewsc&c=82 obsession with the backstreet boys.]).

==Contact Information==
*[mailto:[email protected] [email protected]]
*[mailto:[email protected] [email protected]]
*[mailto:[email protected] [email protected]]
*[mailto:[email protected] [email protected]]
*[mailto:[email protected] [email protected]] as MeriKay Schulz
*[mailto:[email protected] [email protected]] as Joan Blaine

==The other ED page==
If you're wondering why the sockpuppet email accounts using the names of women, you're not alone.

Don't forget to check out Mark's first ED page [[User:UncleBastard2u|UncleBastard2u]] which was ban hammered back in 2009.  He thought he had made a new circle of friends here at ED.  After all, they were trashing Kevin, the nephew he hates with an obsession.  The enemy of my enemy is my friend, so so he thought.  ED, loyal to no one turned on Mark when Mark assumed too much of his new found relationship with ED.  Now he is as much a wanted man for lulz as his nephew.

==External Links==
* [http://www.facebook.com/mprovance1 Mark's Facebook page.]  He keeps it locked down as he doesn't want anyone to see what he says or does.  If you really want to have this blob as a friend, use [http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:vVjL3PG9kxwJ:www.facebook.com/mprovance1+http://www.facebook.com/mprovance1&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us&source=www.google.com this link]
* [http://twitter.com/holdthatkarma Hold That Karma on Twatter]That's the funny thing about kooks who preach karma, they never expect it to come back and bite them in the ass, as Mark is continuously finding out.
* [http://www.classmates.com/directory/public/memberprofile/list.htm?regId=8688565155 Mark's Classmates.com page] He has himself listed under the class of 1989.  That's not the year he graduated.  That's one of the years he taught at South Carroll High School.  It's the year his nephew graduated high school, which certainly does explain his obsession with that particular high school class.
* [http://www.telonu.com/reviews/mark-provance Mark's telonu.com page] Mark keeps having this article taken down and I keep putting it back up.  The truth scares him.
* [http://www.mylife.com/displayProfile.do?uid=295891399 Mark's MyLife page.]
* [http://peerpong.com/mprovance1 His QueerPong page.] Grey & pasty dressed as Santa Claus (another obsession of his) with his roomy wife.
* [http://www.myspace.com/ricehornet The obligatory MySpace page.] Where else can he troll for young fat girls?
* [http://karmaknocks.blogspot.com His blogspot page] where you can witness his Santa obsession first hand.  Considering the photos of all the young girls on that page, plus the commentary about them, one must wonder.
* [http://www.alumniclass.com/Catonsville/alumni-profile?id=4789955 Alumniclass.com page] Man, does this cretin love himself or what?
* [http://articles.baltimoresun.com/2009-05-17/news/0905160065_1_disorder-and-alcoholism-bipolar-disorder-carroll-county Interesting article] about the passing of South Carroll High's vice principal, Teddy Jump.  It was often rumored Jump was gay, but never substantiated.  In the article Mark claims to have 'been drawn closer' to Jump when Mark admitted to being in therapy (Yo Mark, maybe it's time to go back, maybe?)  Jump drew Mark a water-color picture that Mark keeps on his wall.  Oooooh-kay. Creepy.
* [http://www.linkedin.com/pub/mark-provance/28/490/753 StinkedIn page] in which Mark refers to himself as an 'Independent Education Management Professional'.  Sweet statutory!  Sure.  Just make sure any daughter you send his way is over 18 and thin, otherwise they are fair game 'special tutoring' after hours, in the school parking lot.