Horizon: Zero Dawn

STEP THE FUCK OFF! Horizon: Zero Dawn looks like shit but it is NOT a {{crapstub}}. It is a work in progress! If you require assistance beefing up this article, then hit up the experts on our IRC.

File:Souless ginger 6789.jpg

File:20180702 180041.jpg

Horizon: Zero Dawn, or more popularly known as Soulless Ginger versus Dinobots is an exclusive title for the GayStation 4.

Horizon: Zero Dawn is another, man was Stupid and fucked up the world for some reason or another, Apocolyptic, man should be erased from the Earth, Style game where only one Uber Menshe is capable of saving the world and arrives in the future through the favored plot devices of being frozen, cloned or time travels and some examples include games and media like Chrystalis for the NES, Fallout 4, Futurama or Doctor Who.

It follows the same plot devices as the before mentioned in that there's a introductory period, where you are introduced to the character that was born with the right Gene set through either selective breeding or just being born perfect and is the only one capable of saving the world.

Much like games in this genr9, the opening few hours of gameplay are spent being taught that the world is a dangerous place but if the player follow the rules they'll be alright. Predictably, after a few missions the player is introduced to the story that progresses as the game moves on.

Where this game differs from most RPGs of this style is that it has a story mode where the inept player can advance the story without having to fight because they don't haven't acquired enough skills to spam buttons in the right order.

Plot

File:Aloy bow 432.jpg

File:Aloy beehive 567.jpg

this looks more like Fallout with that beehive hairdo

Thanks to self replicating Terminators that can use organic materials like people, trees, topsoil and shit to reconstruct themselves after being destroyed or make more human hunting terminators the human race is on the verge of being destroyed. It is the Dawn of Civilization and due to the efficiency of machines it is coming fast,

To save humanity, the very cliche idea that a Noah's Ark of sorts will be built where the nerds have broken humanity down into Alphas and Betas and decided which people and genes will survive. It is decided that, by the ,Nerds that humanity will let the machines destroy the world, along with the Beta, Gama and basement dwelling humans to then die off break down or power down and die when there is no more organic material left on the Earth (Zero Dawn)

After 200 years, when the Earth was ready for humanity to start making styrofoam, plastic and Hummers again The GAIA system was was built to start repopulating the Earth with birds, animals, plants and humans to drive them to their final extinction.

As a counter measure, if in case GAIA didn't get it right, an antithesis lo GAIA named HADES, (when better names for a destroyer like Shiva or Obama exist) was created to destroy everything if GAIA didn't get it right the first time and then GAIA would start again.

As can be expected, and is the central theme in this plot and genre, HADES goes mad with power deciding it better to destroy humanity, like a liberal tree hugger mad with power and in possession of the nuclear footbal, it sees it unworthy. To protect this new humanity, GAIA An heros to halt HADES' plan to ban hammer humanity from the planet permanently.

To put herself back on line, GAIA clones Dr Elisebet Sobeck, the creator of (Zero Dawn) because with her voice and gene map her Soulles Ginger clone Aloy can gain entry and command all all of the systems.

As is the case with all ✡Moses✡ style stories, with her last breath of power, GAIA clones Dr Elisebet Sobeck and leaves her in a mountain cave and at the entrance to the main GAIA system, to be found by mountain hicks that worship sticks and rocks, so that when she is older the new, younger, Lolita version of Dr Sobeck named Aloy can begin repairs on the GAIA system and stop HADES.

16 years later, when Alloy is a sexy, hot ginger that can bounce quarters off her yight, well arrobocized ass - the game begins.