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User:MisterRemover/Ruslan Akhtyamov: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 15:33, 7 July 2022
Ruslan A. | |
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Nationality: | Ruskie |
High Score | Killed 4, injured 1 |
Top 50? | FUCK NO |
Style | Single Player |
An Hero? | Shotgun mouthwash |
On April 26th, 2022, in the middle of more pressing matters, some batshit insane Ruskie named Ruslan Akhtyamov would enter Ryabinka Kindergarten with a stolen double-barreled shotgun and take the lives of two kindergarteners and a wagecuck, causing moderate butthurt in Russia, with the rest of the world not giving a fuck.
Who was Ruslan?
Sometime in 1996, Mrs. Akhtyamov shat out a bouncing baby retard by the name of Ruslan. Not much is known of Ruslan outside of the fact that he was 26 years old, possibly living with his mother when the attack happened, and that he was also batshit insane. His insanity got to the point where he was registered as mentally ill by the fucking state! He was also friends with the old man he stole his gun from, and became his first victim in the process, and the old man reportedly invited Ruslan over to his house to shoot guns.
Russia and Mass Shootings
Ever since Dmitry Vinogradov's High Score attempt in 2012, there have been a fuckton of Russian players trying to get onto the coveted FPS leaderboard, with only one getting there: Vladislav Roslyakov, a pasty noodle-armed Columbiner that racked up 20 kills using a shotgun and a bomb. Seven years later would come Ilnaz Galyaviev, who racked up 9 kills and Timur Beksurmanov who racked up a measly 6.
This has caused the Russian government to shit themselves, first blaming Western culture, before moving onto passing stricter gun laws in Russia, a country that already has a fuckload of gun control, though that didn't really stop our hero from attempting to get the High Score. How? He just stole the shotgun the old man let him use, and killed him with it.
Loadout
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