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War on drugs: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 22:14, 2 May 2012
Originally called The shorthanded skirmish against illegal substances which may or may not cause harm to somebody, the war on drugs is a US war waged by the man for lulz and booze money, initially on smelly pot smoking hippies in the mid 70s in the hope of turning them from useless hippies that spend all their welfare money on imported drugs into useless yuppies that spend all their easy earned money on imported furniture from Europe and Japan.
The war on drugs was later described by graduates of the school of friggin obvious as "...a slutty waste of public funds which could have been better spent on oversized golden calves dropped randomly by stealth bombers over Canada."
Drug war strategy
- jews dispense welfare
- niggas spend welfare check on drugs
- welfare checks fund the dealers' gangsta lifestyle
- junky run out of money and drugs
- crimes committed to get more drugs
- welfare marginalized
- jews = happy
- ????
- PROFIT!!!
- goto 1
Arguments against the war on drugs
- A tax on legal drugs would bring revenue to troubled government agencies, now that Bush accidentally the economy.
- It costs multiple metric fucktons of taxpayer money
- It has contributed to the largest prison population in world history
- There has never been any evidence that it has done anything to meet its stated goals
- It has left us with a bunch of unemployable ex-convicts
- Making anything illegal makes it profitable, allowing even the smelliest Mexican douchebags to produce trailers full of cash just by carrying stuff from one place to another and occasionally murdering competitors/bystanders
- The murder rate suddenly increased during alcohol prohibition, and dropped steeply after its repeal. The crime rate during drug prohibition continues to increase, for COMPLETELY UNKNOWN reasons, since the two are not even remotely similar
- Drugs {other than alcohol and tobacco} are cut and tanted by AIDS
- Lulzkill. Junkies are funny when they have drugs.
Arguments for the war on drugs
- Amy Winehouse
- Serious entertainment and on-the-job training for US special forces.
- Linear time is lie.
Casualties
With the odd exception of hundreds of innocent people, the war on drugs has proved to be America's most light-hearted war to date.