Oldchan

OldChan is Old.

OLDCHAN is the first unforced meme in at least 100 years. It was recently confirmed that OLDCHAN is in fact Pedobear without his fursuit but it is widely acknowledged that he has come to save /b/ from newfags and is the cure for the cancer that is killing /b/. In other words, Oldchan is the medicine that is curing /b/.

On the First Day

Oldchan created /b/. He saw that it was good.

On the Second Day

Oldchan created moot. He did not foresee him being a faggot in the future -for not even the almighty Oldchan is perfect- but at the time it seemed like a good idea.

On the Third Day

Oldchan created SPARTAAA, and ensured that all the blessed people of /b/ could dine in hell.

On the Fourth Day

Oldchan created the epic forces of win and fail. These forces would balance out 4chan, and be present in equal amounts on good days.

On the Fifth Day

Oldchan created #fortune, and told all the newfags through the power of Encyclopedia Dramatica that it goes in all fields.

On the Sixth Day

Oldchan made his most fatal flaw: he created the furry. He thought it would bring some kind of a social balance, if you will but, as we all know, it only bought epic amounts of fail and ruin to /b/.

On the Seventh Day

Oldchan created his own unique fursuit, and turned into Pedobear. This, my friends, is how /b/ came to /b/e.

Oldchan is the Godfather of an addiction worse than a crack habit for an entire generation of script kiddies (or script pedos).

OLDCHAN MAY BE OLDER THAN ODB!!!

• 
  OLDCHAN is your God now!
• 
  So Ronery
• 
  OLDCHAN = Locke?

Oldchan is part of a series on Chans Visit the Chans Portal for complete coverage.