- Portals
- The Current Year
- ED in the News
- Admins
- Help ED Rebuild
- Archive
- ED Bookmarklet
- Donate Bitcoin
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.
Dylan & Cole Sprouse: Difference between revisions
imported>Sickpuppy Created page with "{{needsmore|pics}} Dylan and Cole Sprouse are identical clones, former Disneyfags, and now useless nobodies. This article is more about Dylan though since his nudes were recently..." |
imported>Schnookums No edit summary |
||
| Line 1: | Line 1: | ||
'''Dylan and Cole Sprouse''' are identical twins, former Disneyfags, and now useless nobodies. | |||
Dylan and Cole Sprouse are identical | Recently, Dylan's nudes were leaked, proving that he's a bigger retard than his brother. | ||
==The pre-nude days== | ==The pre-nude days== | ||
The two took turns playing a cute but annoying kid named Sonny who adopted by [[Jew|Adam Sandler]] in the movie Big Daddy. | |||
In the movie, they demonstrated their superior acting skills by pissing on everything and making multiple demands to hear the KANE-GUH-WOOOO SONNNNNG. | |||
Children, adults and pedophiles thought that Sonny was cute, making the twins famous. | |||
Luckily for the boys, [[Pedobear]] didn't exist in 1999. | |||
==Disneyfag era== | ==Disneyfag era== | ||
Now older but still not legal, the clones got their own TV show on [[Disney]], infamous for raising child actors that were doomed to a future of [[Demi Lovato|drugs]], [[Miley Cyrus|pornography]], [http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/21/corey-feldman-sexual-abuse_n_4136524.html post-sexual assault suicide], or all of the above. | Now older but still not legal, the clones got their own TV show on [[Disney]], infamous for raising child actors that were doomed to a future of [[Demi Lovato|drugs]], [[Miley Cyrus|pornography]], [http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/21/corey-feldman-sexual-abuse_n_4136524.html post-sexual assault suicide], or all of the above. | ||
They had two shows, first The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, followed by the so-original sequel The Suite Life On Deck. The boys gained many pre-teen fans around this time, but they were overshadowed by their older, more mature lifelong fans that had been with them since Big Daddy. | They had two shows, first The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, followed by the so-original sequel The Suite Life On Deck. The boys gained many pre-teen fans around this time, but they were overshadowed by their older, more mature lifelong fans that had been with them since Big Daddy. | ||
While it's claimed that these were "their" shows, they were in fact Disney's bitches and were later banned from acting for asking for creative control. [http://www.usmagazine.com/entertainment/news/dylan-sprouse-explains-why-he-left-disney-channel-2013315 Dylan later went on to BAWWWW about it] and tell a different side of the story which the e-media ran with, adding inches to his post-acting, ever-growing [[e-penis|e-peen.]] | While it's claimed that these were "their" shows, they were in fact Disney's bitches and were later banned from acting for asking for creative control. [http://www.usmagazine.com/entertainment/news/dylan-sprouse-explains-why-he-left-disney-channel-2013315 Dylan later went on to BAWWWW about it] and tell a different side of the story which the e-media ran with, adding inches to his post-acting, ever-growing [[e-penis|e-peen.]] | ||
It's worth noting that even though they were still identical clay molds of each other during this time, they were very easy to tell apart in their television careers because Dylan had grown to become a young [[Fat|hambeast]], most likely a result of Disney fattening him up to appeal to chubby-chasing pedos. | It's worth noting that even though they were still identical clay molds of each other during this time, they were very easy to tell apart in their television careers because Dylan had grown to become a young [[Fat|hambeast]], most likely a result of Disney fattening him up to appeal to chubby-chasing pedos. | ||
==Nice career you've got there.... annnnnnd it's gone== | ==Nice career you've got there.... annnnnnd it's gone== | ||
After the plug was pulled and the Suite Life was no longer sweet, the two faded into obscurity, survived only in [http://www.freewebs.com/d952647468/sprousefeet.htm lifelong fan blog form.] | After the plug was pulled and the Suite Life was no longer sweet, the two faded into obscurity, survived only in [http://www.freewebs.com/d952647468/sprousefeet.htm lifelong fan blog form.] | ||
Dylan failed at selling his art online, the other one that isn't Dylan attempted to stay relevant by making a [[It was a social experiment|blog to troll his own fans]], but nobody cared. Everyone assumed that, being former Disneyfags, they were either on drugs or prostituting on the streets of New York, or both. | Dylan failed at selling his art online, the other one that isn't Dylan attempted to stay relevant by making a [[It was a social experiment|blog to troll his own fans]], but nobody cared. Everyone assumed that, being former Disneyfags, they were either on drugs or prostituting on the streets of New York, or both. | ||
==Pedo prayers get answered== | ==Pedo prayers get answered== | ||
Just when the light of the spotlight had almost completely dimmed out, a miracle happened. A scathing ex-girlfriend/publicity stunt resulted in the leaking of Dylan's 21-year-old package on the internets. This was also followed by an accusation that Dill Pickle was currently working as a waiter at a restaurant because he had spent all his acting money on drugs and alcohol. | Just when the light of the spotlight had almost completely dimmed out, a miracle happened. A scathing ex-girlfriend/publicity stunt resulted in the leaking of Dylan's 21-year-old package on the internets. This was also followed by an accusation that Dill Pickle was currently working as a waiter at a restaurant because he had spent all his acting money on drugs and alcohol. | ||
Not allowing his salty ex to win/himself to miss out on the chance of new relevance, Dill took to the king of media, <s>Howard Stern</s> TMZ, to address the ludicrous broke bitch accusations and claim proud ownership of his tiny penis. Again being foreshadowed by his older clone, Cole attempted to tweet jokes about the size of his brother's junk [[Fail|instead of releasing nudes of his own.]] | Not allowing his salty ex to win/himself to miss out on the chance of new relevance, Dill took to the king of media, <s>Howard Stern</s> TMZ, to address the ludicrous broke bitch accusations and claim proud ownership of his tiny penis. Again being foreshadowed by his older clone, Cole attempted to tweet jokes about the size of his brother's junk [[Fail|instead of releasing nudes of his own.]] | ||
==Oh noes, not again== | ==Oh noes, not again== | ||
Happy that he was not all over the e-news again, Dill saw a sharp increase in Twitter and tumblr followers, and all his Instagram comments had turned into "NUDES NOODS N00DZ." Then a second batch of nudes were leaked, showing Dill with fresh man juice all over his tummy. This time he refused to claim ownership and accused of them being [[shooped]], when [[Fail|it's fucking obvious they are of the same guy in the same bathroom from which he claimed previous ownership of.]] | Happy that he was not all over the e-news again, Dill saw a sharp increase in Twitter and tumblr followers, and all his Instagram comments had turned into "NUDES NOODS N00DZ." Then a second batch of nudes were leaked, showing Dill with fresh man juice all over his tummy. This time he refused to claim ownership and accused of them being [[shooped]], when [[Fail|it's fucking obvious they are of the same guy in the same bathroom from which he claimed previous ownership of.]] | ||
==Their future== | ==Their future== | ||
With no hint of a future career in sight, the only way the clones can stay relevant at this point is to post more nudes or go the full mile and make porn, since their pre-teen fans aren't old enough or rich enough to buy it like their mature fans are, and their loyal pedo fanbase has been with them since the Big Daddy days. | With no hint of a future career in sight, the only way the clones can stay relevant at this point is to post more nudes or go the full mile and make porn, since their pre-teen fans aren't old enough or rich enough to buy it like their mature fans are, and their loyal pedo fanbase has been with them since the Big Daddy days. | ||
==External links== | |||
== | |||
* | *{{twitter|dylansprouse}} | ||
* | *{{twitter|colesprouse}} | ||
* | *{{tumblr|bausprouse}} | ||
* | *{{tumblr|coletureconceptarchive}} - Mirror of Cole's "social experiment" tumblr where he attempted to pass himself off as the intellectually superior clone | ||
* | *{{instagram|thomasbombadil}} | ||
* | *{{instagram|camera_duels}} - Cole's second failed social experiment, this time on Instagram | ||
*[http://www.sprousearts.com | *[http://www.sprousearts.com Failed and abandoned art page] | ||
*[http://perezhilton.com/2013-12-22-dylan-sprouse-more-nude-pics-leaked-again Perez Hilton cums in his pants over Dill's little pickle] | *[http://www.perezhilton.com/2013-12-22-dylan-sprouse-more-nude-pics-leaked-again Perez Hilton cums in his pants over Dill's little pickle] | ||
*http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Daddy_%281999_film%29 | |||
{{tv}} | |||
Revision as of 05:30, 12 March 2014
Dylan and Cole Sprouse are identical twins, former Disneyfags, and now useless nobodies. Recently, Dylan's nudes were leaked, proving that he's a bigger retard than his brother.
The pre-nude days
The two took turns playing a cute but annoying kid named Sonny who adopted by Adam Sandler in the movie Big Daddy. In the movie, they demonstrated their superior acting skills by pissing on everything and making multiple demands to hear the KANE-GUH-WOOOO SONNNNNG.
Children, adults and pedophiles thought that Sonny was cute, making the twins famous. Luckily for the boys, Pedobear didn't exist in 1999.
Disneyfag era
Now older but still not legal, the clones got their own TV show on Disney, infamous for raising child actors that were doomed to a future of drugs, pornography, post-sexual assault suicide, or all of the above.
They had two shows, first The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, followed by the so-original sequel The Suite Life On Deck. The boys gained many pre-teen fans around this time, but they were overshadowed by their older, more mature lifelong fans that had been with them since Big Daddy.
While it's claimed that these were "their" shows, they were in fact Disney's bitches and were later banned from acting for asking for creative control. Dylan later went on to BAWWWW about it and tell a different side of the story which the e-media ran with, adding inches to his post-acting, ever-growing e-peen.
It's worth noting that even though they were still identical clay molds of each other during this time, they were very easy to tell apart in their television careers because Dylan had grown to become a young hambeast, most likely a result of Disney fattening him up to appeal to chubby-chasing pedos.
Nice career you've got there.... annnnnnd it's gone
After the plug was pulled and the Suite Life was no longer sweet, the two faded into obscurity, survived only in lifelong fan blog form.
Dylan failed at selling his art online, the other one that isn't Dylan attempted to stay relevant by making a blog to troll his own fans, but nobody cared. Everyone assumed that, being former Disneyfags, they were either on drugs or prostituting on the streets of New York, or both.
Pedo prayers get answered
Just when the light of the spotlight had almost completely dimmed out, a miracle happened. A scathing ex-girlfriend/publicity stunt resulted in the leaking of Dylan's 21-year-old package on the internets. This was also followed by an accusation that Dill Pickle was currently working as a waiter at a restaurant because he had spent all his acting money on drugs and alcohol.
Not allowing his salty ex to win/himself to miss out on the chance of new relevance, Dill took to the king of media, Howard Stern TMZ, to address the ludicrous broke bitch accusations and claim proud ownership of his tiny penis. Again being foreshadowed by his older clone, Cole attempted to tweet jokes about the size of his brother's junk instead of releasing nudes of his own.
Oh noes, not again
Happy that he was not all over the e-news again, Dill saw a sharp increase in Twitter and tumblr followers, and all his Instagram comments had turned into "NUDES NOODS N00DZ." Then a second batch of nudes were leaked, showing Dill with fresh man juice all over his tummy. This time he refused to claim ownership and accused of them being shooped, when it's fucking obvious they are of the same guy in the same bathroom from which he claimed previous ownership of.
Their future
With no hint of a future career in sight, the only way the clones can stay relevant at this point is to post more nudes or go the full mile and make porn, since their pre-teen fans aren't old enough or rich enough to buy it like their mature fans are, and their loyal pedo fanbase has been with them since the Big Daddy days.
External links
dylansprouse- colesprouse
bausprouse- coletureconceptarchive - Mirror of Cole's "social experiment" tumblr where he attempted to pass himself off as the intellectually superior clone
thomasbombadil- camera_duels - Cole's second failed social experiment, this time on Instagram
- Failed and abandoned art page
- Perez Hilton cums in his pants over Dill's little pickle
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Daddy_%281999_film%29
|
Dylan & Cole Sprouse is part of a series on Visit the Television Portal for complete coverage. |