Depression Quest Simulator

Depression Quest Simulator

Choose your answer from one of the options. Open the answer by clicking the +.
Start by going to 1 and click your answer.

1

You decide to make a game, what do you do?

1. Meet up with a game "journalist" and get him to boink you
2. Learn actual coding
3. Go to Tumblr
4. Dye your hair

2

That didn't work well as he already fucked another girl and you died from AIDS. Try again.

3

You chose to color your hair ugly blue. Good call. What is your next step.

1. Go to Tumblr
2. Have sex with your boyfriend
3. Show your ugly cunt to the world
4. Dox people

4

You decided to stay on Tumblr. Forever. Try again.

5

Coding skills aren't required to make a game, shitlord. Try again.

6

Tumblr was invaded by 4Chan. You kill yourself when you saw a guy defecating on a cat. Try again.

7

You later accuse your boyfriend of raping you as he finished in your asshole. Try again.

8

You managed to show your vagoo to your friends and family. What do?

1. Hit on a guy at a wedding
2. Make a decent game
3. Color hair again
4. Dox people

9

Doxxing is wrong. You go to internet jail forever. Try again.

10

After doxxing people you ponder your next step.

1. Hit on a guy at a wedding
2. Make a decent game
3. Color hair again
4. Dox people

11

Games are for boys. Try again.

12

Color it even bluer? Nope. You lost. Try again.

13

Dox who? Nobody even cares about you. Try again.

14

You successfully almost raped a guy. Now what?

1. Finish the game
2. Put the game on Steam Greenlight
3. Watch some Anita Sarkeesian

15

It is a fucking text-adventure game, how long could it possibly take? You lost. Try again.

16

Correct. Watch as the game gets voted off. Now what?

1. Time to spread the legs for game "journalists" to get positive reviews
2. Actually fix the game
3. Censor people
4. Eat ice-cream and color hair

17

You and Anita fall in love and together you decide to not create any video game, and instead just bitch at games. Try again.

18

Your game is now popular. People call you out on nepotism and for fucking your way to publicity

1. Suck off those people as well
2. Try to ban those people from internets

19

LOL NO. Try again.

20

Nobody even knows about your game, except the people who downvoted your game on Steam. Try again.

21

That was the final coffin for your butterface. You are not unable to get through the door. You are stuck forever, fatty. Try again.

22

They were in another country and you couldn't suck enough dick to fund the bus ticket. Try again.

23

Congratulations you successfully fucked your way to fame. You sure are a strong voice for women.

30

You have reached a secret area of the game, not accessible without using console commands. Congrats on being a cheating cheater who cheats.

See Also

• Zoe Quinn