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Portal:Crime/Featured Article: Difference between revisions

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{{:Portal:Crime/Featured Article/title|Wanted Level}}
{{:Portal:Crime/Featured Article/title|Maniacs Murder Cult}}
[[File:Stonetoss - Party Vanned but at least they liked the Memes.PNG|200px|right]]
[[File:ManiacMurderjak.jpg|200px|right]]
[[Cock]] and [[pussy]] are begging to be gobbled and chewed up. However, there is a cock-pussy gang who refuses to munch down on [[Genital Herpes|genital]] meat, because it's against their [[Bullshit|religion]] and their [[Angry Gay Pope|Holy Leader]] Jesus Edgar Hoover will throw a high-heeled shoe at them. That would be the highly [[Mormon]]ic gang of thugs known as the '''Federal Bureau of Investigation'''. Also known as '''The Authorities''', '''The Feds''', '''Federal Bureau (for) Israel''', or the '''Fucking Bunch of Idiots''' ([http://www.barrypopik.com/index.php/new_york_city/entry/fucking_bunch_of_idiots_federal_bureau_of_investigation_or_fbi_nickname/ it's true!]), the '''Party Van''' is [[SERIOUS BUSINESS]], designed to help corporations throw you in [[jail]] for sharing ones and zeroes—despite [[Communism|sharing]] [[Lie|being the basis of our human society]]. Having purged all the [[Communism|Commies]] and [[Nigger|nonconformists]] from Amerika, now they're after ''you''.
'''Maniacs Murder Cult''' ([[Russian|Russkie]]: '''Маньяки: культ убийства''', lit. "''Maniacs: Cult of Murder''") is an ultra [[edgy]] [[Slav]]ic [[white supremacist]] organization that was founded in [[2017]] by a [[Ukraine|Ukrainian]] [[Neo-Nazi]] named '''Yegor Krasnov''', thus undermining the [[MSM|Lame Stream Media]]'s [[Propaganda|narrative]] that Ukraine is totally not filled with [[Nazis]]. The Maniacs Murder Cult specializes in [[terrorism]], [[murder]], the posting of [[soyjak]]s and coming up with extremely fucking [[retarded]] plots to murder [[Jewish]] children in the [[United States]].
<center>'''[[Party Van|(( UH OH, V& ))]]'''</center>
 
In 2024, the [[FBI]] arrested the current leader of the Maniacs Murder Cult, the aptly named '''Commander Butcher''', whom they identified as a "[[Georgia]]n national"  since they apparently forgot that [[Georgia,_USA|Georgia]] is actually a state. Michail Chickachickaboomboom was charged with conspiring to commit mass murder in [[New York]] by getting [[You|some random guy]] to dress up as [[Santa Claus]] and hand out poisoned candy to little [[Jewish]] kids on [[THE CURRENT YEAR|New Years Eve]]. Needless to say, this plot failed since Jews are not particularly known for having the spirit of [[Christmas]] or [[Halloween]] within them.
<center>'''[[Maniacs Murder Cult|(( THEIR LEADER JUST GOT VANNED LOL ))]]'''</center>

Latest revision as of 10:55, 25 September 2024


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Featured Article
Party Van

Maniacs Murder Cult (Russkie: Маньяки: культ убийства, lit. "Maniacs: Cult of Murder") is an ultra edgy Slavic white supremacist organization that was founded in 2017 by a Ukrainian Neo-Nazi named Yegor Krasnov, thus undermining the Lame Stream Media's narrative that Ukraine is totally not filled with Nazis. The Maniacs Murder Cult specializes in terrorism, murder, the posting of soyjaks and coming up with extremely fucking retarded plots to murder Jewish children in the United States.

In 2024, the FBI arrested the current leader of the Maniacs Murder Cult, the aptly named Commander Butcher, whom they identified as a "Georgian national" since they apparently forgot that Georgia is actually a state. Michail Chickachickaboomboom was charged with conspiring to commit mass murder in New York by getting some random guy to dress up as Santa Claus and hand out poisoned candy to little Jewish kids on New Years Eve. Needless to say, this plot failed since Jews are not particularly known for having the spirit of Christmas or Halloween within them.

(( THEIR LEADER JUST GOT VANNED LOL ))
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