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{{tl;dr}}
Two Worlds aka "Ari from Chicago" aka "Ariel Campos" aka "12 Herbs and Spices" is a [[goon]] and carefag best known for [[Assburgers|sperging out]] and being [[permabanned]] from the [[Something Awful]] forums.  
Two Worlds aka "Ari from Chicago" aka "Ariel Campos" aka "12 Herbs and Spices" is a [[goon]] and carefag best known for [[Assburgers|sperging out]] and being [[permabanned]] from the [[Something Awful]] forums.  



Latest revision as of 06:09, 9 August 2024

Two Worlds aka "Ari from Chicago" aka "Ariel Campos" aka "12 Herbs and Spices" is a goon and carefag best known for sperging out and being permabanned from the Something Awful forums.

Two Worlds was called out by Helldump multiple times, before its demise (RIP), for being an ultimate sperglord. He has a LiveJournal account where he discusses, in detail, his belief in the "Ariel Mythos." He actually believes that he is a character in a comic book and that he has multiple personas as part of the "Arielverse." He calls himself "two worlds" because he believes he is the only person who is able to exist in two forms, as an "Internet" person and a normal person. Normal people, of course, are people with no secrets or weird fetishes, they go to church, have 9 to 5 jobs and never use the Internet outside of basic things like email.

The tale of his sperging was made epic after a group of SA goons on Skype recorded calls with Two Worlds where he cried over being called a carefag by a curvy goonette, went into detail about his then-girlfriend's stinky vagina, talked about wanting to cross meat swords with Daniel Craig (no homo) and his small penis. The calls were made over several months in the summer of 2009 where Two Worlds spilled his guts for epic lulz.


   
 
MY NAME IS ARIEL ANTONIO CAMPOS JR, SON OF ARIEL ANTONIO CAMPOS SR, CHOSEN BY THE ONE TRUE CHRISTIAN GOD, ALUMNUS OF THE ROLLA HIGH SCHOOL CLASS OF 2001 AND THE UNIVERSITY OF MISSOURI CLASS OF 2007, SOMETHING AWFUL GOON, REGISTERED IN 2003. LOYAL SERVANT TO THE TRUE LEADER OF THE SA FORUMS, RICH "LOWTAX" KYANKA. SON OF A DEADBEAT FATHER, BROTHER OF A DISGRACED SISTER...AND I WILL HAVE MY VENGENCE IN THIS WORLD OR THE NEXT.
 

 
 

—Two Worlds

The Arielverse

The Arielverse, as described in Two World's LiveJournal, is a series of comics written on Keystone Earth whose main character is Two Worlds. Within Two Worlds there are up to 6 personas. The Brute, who is the sexual persona with deviant fetishes. The Tempest, when Two Worlds is angry he becomes violent comotion of sperg. The Saint is when he is being a good Confessional Lutheran boy. Partyman once a single mixed drink is consumed he becomes the sperg of the party. The Puppetmaster is what he becomes when he's trying to hatch an evil scheme on someone. Mr. C is now presumed dead. This is his teaching persona that left him in the middle of class, resulting in a self described dementor attack and why Two Worlds got fired from his first job as a teacher.

   
 
One force canceling out the other. Even within me, even all my personas. The Saint counteracts the Brute. Mr. C counteracts the Partyman. The Puppetmaster counteracts the Tempest. Six personas, always the number six, and in the center...me.
 

 
 

—Two Worlds' LiveJournal

This is also key to understanding the origin of why he calls himself Two Worlds. There are two distinct worlds in the Arielverse. There is Homo Lumen and Homo Cthoni, Upper Worlders and Under Worlders. People who go to Walmart, have a home, a car, 2.5 children, have jobs, go to school, be a normal person in society are Upper Worlders and don't use the Internet. He also believes that Upper Worlders don't know what true suffering is since their lives are so perfect and normal. Under Worlders are people who know Internet culture. Under Worlders are also the dregs of society like prostitutes, goths, drug dealers, punks and other subcultures. They cannot have an Upper Worlder existance at all. Only Two Worlds can span both of these worlds, hence the name.

   
 
That's what my life has always been about--contrast, and with it, conflict. Light and darkness. Good and evil. The eternal spiritual battle. I walk freely between the two worlds. And because of it...I consist entirely of opposites, always struggling within me.
 

 
 

—Two Worlds' LiveJournal

Two Worlds will explain that he can be conservative and liberal at the same time, since he is of Two Worlds. Even in a discussion on gay marriage, he will use this excuse to illustrate how he is both for and against. Yet, he will become completely disgusted if anyone suggests that his sexuality and gender could be of a binary nature. Or even how pre-op transexual women would be perfect for him, since they too are stuck between two worlds.

Ariel believes that the authors of his life reside on Keystone Earth (real Earth). And every major event in his life has a particular author. Naturally, he refers to periods of his life as story arcs. Unpleasent experiences that happened in one story arc will be conveniently retconned. For example, he tried to hit on a retarded girl at a chess club meeting, that has now been retconned. One recent soon-to-be retconned experience is when he committed infedelity with a married pregnant woman while in the backseat of a truck being driven by another girl.

Ariel believes that people in his life are nothing more than mere figments of his imagination, since we're on Earth-959 (imaginary Earth). He uses this as a shield for when people say hurtful things about him, and will remind them that they are only figments on his imagination and aren't even real.

Obviously, comic books play a big role in Ariel's creation of the Arielverse. X-men characters make frequent appearances in his life, as chronicled in his LiveJournal. During a break down as a teacher in front of his students, he started crying because the dementors were attacking him and his 6th Persona (Mr. C) had left him, he made a quick call to Profressor Xavier. Normally Professor X brings Ariel the dream helm, but this time the X-Men were too busy due to a S.H.I.E.L.D helicarrier being hijacked in Australia. Another time, Scott Summers (Cyclops of the X-men) was making small talk with Ariel outside the X-men mansion. Ariel recounted how even Scott Summers thought he was strange after the conversation.

Also he will write his own fanfiction in his LiveJournal. Once he wrote the story of him losing his virginity as told by his own students represented by a picture of Dakota Fanning:

   
 
I guess u want to no more about Mr. Campos so I'll tell u about him lol :-p OMG so he got a gf now!! Yay! Me and Vanessa and Brooke r so happy for him! She haz red hair and is so pretty! We saw her 1nce during finals wk..she brought him lunch awwwww :) Mon of Finals Wk mr. Campos came in and he seemed sooooo happy and looked a lot better and told Veronica and me later on that he went on a date w a girl Fri!!! He still yelled at us sum during finals though :'( I havnt seen him since the last day of skewl but Graham McDunn said he saw Mr campos at his church and he said he wuz looking for a new job...i hope he gets one soon!! I wonder if he still has NE $$ left...mayB his gf is helping him. :) I kno he wuz working rly hard at lsa and may-b he doesnt have time to do much evn now like write or ne-thing...
 

 
 

—Two Worlds' LiveJournal

90% of his LiveJournal has to do directly with The Arielverse. There are times when he writes about the Arielverse as though you're reading a Comic Book Trade magazine. A single LiveJournal entry was dedicated to interviewing people on Keystone Earth about how no one could believe that the authors were going to kill off the greatest comic book hero of all time. Some saw this as his suicide note. He has yet to complete the task.

Printouts of these LiveJournals are kept with him. These are probably his most prized possessions. When he moved out of his mother's house, the print outs needed to be moved as well. He instructed his family to cover every mirror in the house, including reflective surfaces like TVs. Afterwards, he instructed them to turn their backs to the house and not look until he gave the all clear. The printouts of his LiveJournal have the same power of the arc of the covenant. Even the comic book character The Watcher was present for the momentus event of Ariel moving the printouts and finally moving out of his mother's house.

Background

Ariel Campos is a major momma's boy who grew up on the mean streets of Rolla, Missouri. He was a crazy antisocial geek from a young age. He made a promise to himself in the 8th grade, after being sent to the principal's office for sexually harassing girls, that he couldn't swear until he lost his virginity and couldn't cry until he had sex. He would replace swear words with other words like "fark" instead of fuck, "ninja" instead of nigga or black person, kitty instead of the word pussy, etc. There were some exceptions, such as being able to say "Go yiff in hell you fucking furfag." But the exceptions were pretty inconsistent.

He's known for his disgusting habits like never bathing, brushing his teeth, washing clothes, etc. He took not washing clothes to the extreme by having a dedicated "spank sock" that he never washed. He didn't see why you'd need to wash something that you only came in. This sock is still stored in a box at a relatives house, unwashed.

For a while he wished he was gay. He believes that all gay men are attractive and have lots of friends, and he'll have girls falling over him wanting to be his fag hag. But at the same time he is vehemontly against homosexuality and swears he is not gay.

Although he claims to be in between the two worlds of the Internet and the real world, no one has more cross over between lives. Most people probably keep their Internet postings and general Internet shenanigans out of conversation with real life friends. Ariel does not do this. He talks about Something Awful on his Twitter and Facebook. He uses memes in real life. He even goatsed everyone on his Facebook once. Even when talking to regular people, not on the Internet, he'll still use memes like "an hero," "tl;dr," :smug:, etc.

Some of his fetishes are publicly known, such as lactation porn, BBW, pregnant porn, water sports, underdeveloped girls, feet is a huge one, etc. The girl he lost his virginity to could have been mistaken for a Norse monster, but some women who are less fat he will refuse to date because he says that they waddle, and are thus "the bad type of fat." Even though he would love to piss on a girl, he would never let a woman piss on him because it would be disgusting. Another sensitive area for him is a girl who would touch below his balls. He firmly believes that if a girl touched his peckered asshole and he enjoyed it, he would be gay.

He is known for constantly sexually harassing women, especially non-Lutheran women. If a girl is non-Lutheran he has no problem asking them to make homegrown for his own personal enjoyment. When he's mad at you and you're a female he will threaten to masturbate to your photos, which he saves from Facebook and AwfulYearBook. This stems from his belief that only non-Lutheran women enjoy sex. On the other hand, Lutheran women derive no pleasure from the act and only like to knit, not being sarcastic.

For quite some time, he has bragged about his prowess as a drinker. In college, he would drink Smirnoff Ice. If anyone would call him out on this, he'd fill up a bottle with water and make everyone watch him slam it. Everyone knew he was drinking water. After college, he will brag about how he got completely trashed after drinking 3 cocktails, he thought that was a lot.

For good reason he has been described as the Gooniest Goon to have Gooned across the Gooniverse.

He has two siblings. His sister is a stripper that he believes was taken by body snatchers because he started to become attarcted to her.

He attended college for far too many years at University of Missouri — Rolla (now Missouri S&T) where he graduated with a degree in history and got his teaching certificate. He then moved to Decatur, Illinois to teach at a Lutheran private high school.

As a teacher, Two Worlds was a complete failure — much like everything in his life. He would often be easily overpowered by his students and lose complete control of the class. Even a class of two students he couldn't control. This was probably because they knew he was a loser 25-year-old virgin speglord. In the end, some of the students who actually wanted to learn complained and his contract was not renewed.

So now that he was unemployed, he got to spend even more time on the Internet and somehow landed a hambeast of a girlfriend. This beast named Katie actually had sex with him, of course, he didn't consider he actually lost his virginity until the third time they "made love" because he hadn't came before then. This is because he has a condition called Phimosis where his dick is entrapped in his foreskin, it's about 3 inches long when hard and Katie's vagina was a cavernous wreck. They would stick various household objects into her, such as cellphones, salt shakers, remote controls, etc. Not to mention the putrid stench that came from her pussy he described was akin to "opening the tombs of the Pharaohs. WHOOOSH!!"

The moment he actually lost his virginity was difficult for him to determin. He didn't count the first 4 times they had sex since he didn't cum or they didn't both cum. He was having problems staying hard. He believed that pussy juices had numbing agents in them. On the 5th try, he jacked himself off and stuck his dick inside her the moment he came. He let out a long awaited "fuck," which he immediately posted on Facebook. He also called people from middle school who didn't remember who the fuck he was to tell them he had mated with a woman.

   
 
Ariel Campos: I'm not sure if you remember me, but I went to high school with you. I was in your 6th hour Math Study Hall with you in Mrs. Freese's class. 10 years ago I swore an oath that if the moment I lost my virginity, you'd be the first to know. That moment has happened now. Fuck. Spread the word.

Rich *****: Holy shit... are you for real?
 


 
 

—Two Worlds' LiveJournal


Katie told him she had sex with eleven guys before him but he refused to wear a condom when having sex with her. He believed he wouldn't get an STD because she was infertile and he was scared someone might see him buy condoms and he would be mortally embarassed. He was also conerned about finding condoms in a small enough size. He refused to get tested for STDs as well. He fears that a nurse or doctor will tell someone at his church and he will be shunned by upper worlders.

He loves for people to give him advice but he never takes it, only getting himself into constantly worse situations and then crying like a baby when shit hits the fan.

Eventually, Katie dumped him and he got a job as a pizza delivery boy. Now he works at a library.

Although Two Worlds clearly has mental problems, he has only visited a therapist a few times. Normally he would skip appointments and never tell the therapist what was truly bothering him. Two Worlds said that the therapist was an upper worlder and would never understand the problems of the underworld, much less be able to help someone who could cross both worlds. After a short period of time, the therapist didn't think he could provide any help and referred Two Worlds to an actual psychiatrist. After one visit he never went back because it required getting a blood test done before any medication could be perscribed. He compares his insanity to having a cold and thinks he's getting better.

Two Worlds thinks he's the best dancer ever. Watch the end to see him throw up the Two Worlds gang sign

Something Awful Career

Before being permabanned for being creepy, Two Worlds was a proud member of Something Awful. He took his posting career very seriously, to the point of calling out Helldump and challenging them. He called himself the defender of GBS and goons.

   
 
I am Ariel Campos. I am a fighter. I am a gladiator. I stood before the arena of Helldump, and posted.
 

 
 

— Two Worlds

This resulted in many lulz and several call out threads where Helldumpers tore apart his LiveJournal and exposed him.

He went to Goon Meets where he proved to be the most awkward goon in a sea of awkwardness. When he was at a Chicago goon meet, he just jumped into a taxi at a stop light instead of flagging them down because "that's how they do it in GTA 4."

A set of goons that pitied him invited him to their Thanksgiving meal. They took him to a club where he preceded to make a "two worlds" symbol with his hands in every photograph (a peace sign on one hand, three fingers up for W on the other).

   
 
Lowtax had a dream that was Something Awful. This is not it. This is not it!
 

 
 

— Two Worlds

Two Worlds discusses his Helldump post in his LiveJournal:

 
 
After I came back from my extended posting hiatus--this was right around the beginning of the fall--Helldump had apparently grown antsy. With a dearth of callout subjects and with the Forums search function perpetually broken and being worked on, Helldump was a beast tired of being caged, and tired of being fed morsels. A few of the Helldump superstars such as nationalism, Deek, Dirty Rob, and a few others began staging trolling attacks in various GBS threads, threadsh*tting by derailing, fakeposting, etc. A few hapless GBS posters took the bait, which the Helldumpers then crowed triumphantly over in the goons.txt thread in Helldump. For some reason, this really angered me. So much so, that I felt it was my duty to the Forums to also start posting in those same threads in GBS, hoping I could call the Helldumpers out for the trolls they are and attempt to yell them down. For their part, the Helldumpers were ecstatic to see me posting in there, finding that in putting down the bait for the little fish, instead they had hooked a big fish, and were now reeling it all the way in.


I think, perhaps, that my downward slide into paranoid obsession started when I started to see myself as the "lone protector" of GBS and of goonkind in general--I was a vigilante, a crusader, a legionaire, a gladiator, fighting to defend the great, embattled Goon Empire against the barbarian threats from within its walls. Consider, for instance, this reply that I made, when one Helldumper asked me the very same question--why should I see myself as some kind of legendary goon hero?


"Because I'm the hero the SA Forums deserve...but not the one it needs right now. So Helldump will hunt me. Because I can take it. Because I'm not a hero. I'm the voice of the people...the exhorter...a white knight."


To this end, I decided to take the battle to the enemy, and make them an offer they couldn't refuse:


Helldump, You hate goons. You know that. I know that. You hate everything that is "goony", which for you is EVERY part of the Forums, and every person that has ever posted on the Forums that is not you. Coincidentally, this is the same m.o. as SASS, the Something Awful Syncophant Squad. THEY hate everything that is goony too. Yet, somehow, you continue to exist on the Forums, while they do not. A goon is someone who posts on the SA Forums. That makes YOU, Helldump, a goon by definition.


So I'm issuing an open challenge to you, all you Helldump Superstars. Some of you I know more personally than others, and I'm speaking more to the Helldumpers who I don't know on a personal level. If you do hate goons so much, and if you do despise SA Forums posters, then put your money where your mouth is--ban yourselves and go join your SASS compatriots. You constantly decry goons, and you still post on the same forums as us. You're being cowards and hypocrites by being on here, so do us all a favor, and quit taking up server space. You bash goons for being wimps and chickening out, so here's your chance to prove us wrong. Grow some balls, and ban yourselves.


P.S. If this thread isn't okay with the mods/admins go ahead and close it, that's fine with me. This will most likely end up being a weekend diversion, and come Monday I've got "real" stuff to do (work and everything), so after Sunday afternoon or so I'll probably abandon it. I'll leave it to the discretion of The Powers That Be whether this thread should stick around. Just don't ban or probate me please
 


 

—Two Worlds

Two Worlds was finally permabanned by mod Aybraham in his own mod challenge thread. Two Worlds begged the mod to allow him to enter the "Goon Love is the Best Love" challenge where goons went on dates with other goons. Because it was after the event had started, Aybraham gave Two Worlds his own thread with his own challenge to go on a date and post results or risk getting banned. If he won, he would have gained trolling immunity and Ayb said he would apologize for not believing in the Arielverse.

In the end, it was not a lack of completing the challenge the permabanned him. A damning essay written by one of the goons from Skype about Ariel's level of insanity got him banned for being Two Worlds.

   
 
ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED? ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED? IS IT NOT WHY YOU ARE HERE?
 

 
 

—Two Worlds

Recently, an account registered on the forums as "12 Herbs and Spices" and posted a single thread in Ask/Tell entitled: "Tell me about Phimosis: A weird penis problem". This thread is believed to be Two Worlds or an impersonator who sounds a hell of a lot like him. The account posted pictures of Two Worlds' penis and talked about the many problems he has.

   
 
I'm not a goon anymore. I'm an Internets ronin. I serve no master, and no Internet e-tribe like the goons, or the Channers, or the EDiots, or the Redditors, or the Diggers, or the YTMNDers, or the Wikipedians, or the Deviants, or the furries. I am simply Two Worlds. I wander the Internets endlessly, and am bound to no rules confining any of the e-tribes."
 

 
 

—Two Worlds

The Brute

 
 
It wasn't the first time. Lately at the movie theater I've been having what I call "Brute attacks". There are times when I'm just standing around at concession, and then I start looking at the girls I work with, and all of a sudden all I can think of is sexual stuff, like mentally undressing, and thinking about porn, and stuff like that. It's like the Brute has found some way to hack into my brain, and it's like...he sends me all these thoughts, these mental images. When I'm under these Brute attacks it's like all I can think of is sex and porn--like the Brute has taken control of my mind. I feel short of breath, my heart starts beating faster. The very act of trying to think about something else brings these images into my mind only faster. I dunno, maybe it's because the only time I've been able to interact with girls has been at the movie theater, but sometimes these Brute attacks come on pretty strong.


And when I saw Sally ***** that was one of those Brute attacks. All I could think of was the deep red shade of lipstick she was wearing, the almost-sheer fabric of her blouse, her stiletto heels on her boots...even as I continued to set-up for the next show I felt the Brute starting to take over. I tried to keep my mouth shut, of course. I didn't want anyone else to know--least of all Sally--that I was starting to become attracted to her. And yet somehow words still fell out of my mouth, and I felt myself talking to Sally-"Hey, I never saw you wear makeup before. You look pretty good in it" "So are those boots, or are they high heels?" "You should try painting your nails sometime" Sally, for her own part, was pretty oblivious, fortunately. Somehow we got through the first show, as people started piling in. We got swamped pretty badly.But after the show the Brute attacks started coming on pretty intensely again. The images that the Brute was sending me...the thoughts...
 


 

—Two Worlds' LiveJournal

Selected LiveJournal Quotes

Two Worlds Loses His Virginity

 
 
That's what it really felt like--literally diving in. I felt like I was launching myself head first into Katie's mouth-- metaphorically speaking. I felt like I was jumping into a place that I had no idea where I was going to--someplace far, far away from anywhere I had known before, except in movies, or books, or comics, or porn.

Kissing became tongue-kissing. Tongue-kissing became making out, then heavily making out, then groping atclothes. No matter how frantic the on-screen characters became, the story here was more interesting to me.

"Do you wanna...just, uh, forget about the movie..."

"Uh-huh."

"...and go to my bedroom instead?"

"Sure."

It just crept up on me, just like that. The "big moment", everything that I had been waiting and preparing for, just...happened. I didn't have time to think about it--I think if I did have time I would've choked up or chickened out or got really freaked out. I didn't have time to think about it.

The thing that made me realize that Katie was such a keeper was that she was so understanding and accomodating about a lot of stuff. She understood that I hadn't ever done anything with a girl before (even kissed a girl), and she was fine with that. That's the thing that made Katie so unique from every other girl I had known--she wanted me. Even if that meant putting up with a lot of my shortcomings, lack of experience, etc.

We reached for each other in the dark of my room.

"You can take off my shirt if you want..."

"Oh. I didn't know, uh, if you minded."

"Sure."

A few more moments passed.

"Oh...man....fark..."

"It's okay. Take your time."

"Sorry, I just..."

"It's okay." She gasped rapidly. "We can do whatever you'd like tonight."

It wasn't more than what I had expected, or less than I had expected. It was just...it. It wasn't un-pleasant. In fact, I couldn't have asked for a better girl to be understanding enough for a 26 year old guy that all this was happening to at once. It was mind-boggling to me, that's why I tried not to think about it too much. One moment I was just letting Katie in, next I was making out with a girl for the first time, and the next...

"Oh...f*ck..." her words grew softer as her breathing grew faster. I didn't want to look around, or think about how rediculous I looked without any clothes on, or even think about why Katie would want to do anything with a guy that looked as hideous naked as I did. I didn't want to see myself now. I repeated this to Katie out loud when she wanted to embrace in front of the mirror afterwards, when I was washing my hands. I didn't want to think about that now. I only wanted to concentrate on matching her breathing to my own rhythm. The more I coordinated with her, the louder her breathing grew, which then turned into moans, and then louder moans.

Some time later...

Again, I had her in my grasp. I was on top of her, trying only to look at her face, trying to look only at her reaction to me, not thinking of my own appearance in my eyes at that point. I was on her, her legs planted in back of me, my legs stock-straight next to each other. She told me to spread my legs less, that way I could go in more. I sucked air in one more time, then expelled it in one big exhalation. And collapsed on her, spent.

I looked up at her (she was tall) and smiled. She smiled back softly. I looked skyward for a second, and chuckled quietly, a secret smile appearing on my face in the dark.

"Fuck."
 


 

—Two Worlds


Spreading The Word

Two Worlds also wrote about how he spread the word to his friends about losing his virginity. He wrote his own fanfiction about part of it. Although I suspect the first two are true.

   
 
Between Travis ****** and you


Ariel Campos: Can't find your phone number, so I'll let you know this way...4 years ago I swore to you that once I lost my virginity you'd be the first to know...fuck. It happened. Spread the word.


Travis ******: So I heard...

 


 
 

—Two Worlds, Facebook


   
 
Between Rich ***** and you


Ariel Campos: I'm not sure if you remember me, but I went to high school with you. I was in your 6th hour Math Study Hall with you in Mrs. Freese's class. 10 years ago I swore an oath that if the moment I lost my virginity, you'd be the first to know. That moment has happened now. Fuck. Spread the word.


Rich Frederick: Holy shit... are you for real?

 


 
 

—Two Worlds, Facebook


   
 
Rolla. JCPenny Hair Salon


Ashley was just locking up the salon for the night when she got the text from her friend Martha. Summer days were always more busy at the salon--more customers looking for ways to beat the humidity and heat with a great hairstyle. She was glad she could lend her expertise, and even better, she had church tomorrow night at First Baptist. Maybe that's why Martha was texting her. She opened her cellphone to read the message, and screamed--partially from disgust and partially from interest.


"MARTHA! THAT'S DISGUSTING, WHY DID HE TELL PEOPLE THAT?!"

 


 
 

—Two Worlds, LiveJournal

The Inner Helldump In His Head

 
 
All this happened, once again, over the course of several days, about a week. It was a lot like during my first, and biggest, callout. I'd go off to work during the day and put on a semblance of normalcy, but inside I'd be struggling about Helldump's poisonous words. I was a horrible teacher. I was a creepy teacher. My students are all laughing at me. I'm unfixably broken. I'm repulsive to girls. I'll never be able to fit in. Throughout church, school, Holy Smokes meetings, Wal-Mart runs, and the occasional outing to Katz', the local slightly upscale martini bar, I could hear the "inner Helldump"--the same one that had followed me through junior high, high school, college, and beyond. I had Helldump down pat, even before Helldump was created:

"You saw how Lisa didn't return your smile. Look at how mad she looks. You know she's been getting complaints from parents about you."

"Have you noticed that none of the other high school teachers have started conversations with you recently? They haven't even said hi. They're backing off, they know a teacher that's going to get the ax when they see one."

"See how Daryl and Michael looked at you when you made that basketball joke? They know you don't know what you're talking about. They know you're just begging for acceptance. They don't like it. They're annoyed by you. You know it's true."

"That bartender gave you that snide look. Don't pretend like you didn't see it. And those girls--look at how they're pretending to look right through you. Like you're not even there. They don't see you, because you don't matter. They're all laughing at you."

"They're laughing at you."

"They're laughing at you."

"They're laughing at you."
 


 

—Two Worlds, LiveJournal

Links

The Two Worlds Tapes

Two Worlds' Phimosis Thread

TwoWorlds' LiveJournal - Friends only

TwoWorlds' Facebook

TwoWorlds' Dancing at a Club

Second video of him dancing

Third video of him dancing

Arbchat

Chat