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Kingscrusher: Difference between revisions
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{{lollercoaster}} | |||
[[Image:Kingscrusher.jpg|thumb|right|I suck at chess.]] | |||
'''Tryfon Costas Gavriel''' is a [[Fat|fat]] [[British|British]] [[Internet_celebrity|Internet celebrity]] and [[Faggot|chess-player]]. His titles include FIDE Candidate Master (CM)& British Regional Master. Tryfon Gavriel's [[Jewtube|Youtube]] channel has had [[Over9000|over 7 million]] views and he is [[Some_argue|widely considered]] the worst online chess commentator due to his constant farting and ranting. Gavriel's [[Faggotry|knowledge]] and [[Fetish|passion]] for the gayme of chess has helped educate and inspire [[Fucktard|chess players]] from all over the world. His other hobbies are watching [[1man1jar|the latest films]], [[CSIII|Computing]], [[Basement_dweller|going out]], [[Friend_Zone|seeing friends]], [[Fap|watching TV]]. | |||
==The beginning== | |||
Tryfon got interested in chess through being molested by his father at a young age with chess pieces. He then started playing against him regularly with the chess pieces as he enjoyed it. The openings typically went: e4 e5 Nf3 Nc6 Bc4 Bc5 (The Giuoco Piano!). He thinks this was a simple opening to start playing chess with, although boringly symmetrical. He thinks this explains why he [[Fetish|is into]] the [[Indian|Indian]] systems, and not the classical systems! Being an arrogant prick, he compares himself with [[Russia|Garry Kasparov]] on his [http://www.gtryfon.demon.co.uk/bcc/Author_information/chesscv.htm personal website]. | |||
==Primary openings== | |||
Kingscrusher is [[Gay|experienced]] in the Kings Indian defence, Svenshnikov [[Mafia|sicillian]], and plays both d4 and e4 with the [[Racist|white]] pieces. He has his favourite systems with the white pieces because he is a [[Nazi|nazifag]]. | |||
==Career highlights== | |||
[[Shit_nobody_cares_about|December 1997]]: Beat first International Master - IM Danny Kopec (USA) in December [[UK|London]] Internationals. The following is the game score: | |||
[[Tl;dr|1. d4 Nf6 2. Nf3 g6 3. Bg5 Bg7 4. Nbd2 d5 5. e3 Nbd7 6. Bd3 b6 7. O-O Bb7 8. c4 O-O 9. cxd5 Nxd5 10. e4 N5f6 11. Qe2 h6 12. Bf4 c5 {(Draw offer)} 13. d5 Nh5 14. Be3 Qc7 15. g3 Ndf6 16. Nh4 Bc8 17. f4 Bh3 18. Ng2 Rad8 19. Bc4 Kh8 20. a4 Rg8 21. Rae1 Bg4 22. Qf2 Bh3 23. Be2 Ng4 24. Bxg4 Bxg4 25. Nc4 Bh3 26. Qf3 Bc8 27. g4 Nf6 28. Ne5 Rgf8 29. Nh4 Kg8 30. h3 Bb7 31. Nhxg6 fxg6 32. Nxg6 Rf7 33. Ne5 Rff8 34. Ng6 Rf7 35. f5 Nxd5 36. exd5 Bxd5 37. Qf4 e5 38. Qg3 Bc4 39. Rf3 e4 40. Rf4 Bf6 41. Qf2 Bd3 42. h4 Bg5 43. hxg5 hxg5 44. f6 gxf4 45. Bxf4 Qd7 | |||
46. Qh4 Qd4+ 47. Be3 Qxf6 48. Ne7+ Qxe7 49. Bg5 Qe5 50. Bxd8 Qd4+ 0-1]] | |||
November 2011: His other career highlight was talking to a girl for the first time. Tryfon asked her on a date and she said "No, you ugly fat bitch." I suppose it wasn't only his ugliness, but he asked her out on Chesscube.com, which really doesn't qualify as talking to a girl. Disregard this then, Kingscrusher has never talked to a girl yet. | |||
== Ways of Winning == | |||
Kingscrusher's plays on Chesscube. His games are usually won on winning on time in a lost position(because he sucks cock at chess) or performing cheap tricks. | |||
== Jewtube Channel == | |||
The fat ass also posts youtube videos of playing on the ICC((I) am a (C)ocksucking (C)oont loser so I play here) of him winning on time or using cheap tricks. He also pickpockets his recordings and 99% of his videos are when he wins, and the other 1% when he loses or draws. This is to make the community think he is good at chess. If the fanboy population though for a moment, they would know he sucked based on these calculations: | |||
Kingscrusher is on the computer 18 hours a day. 3 are of him arguing on chesscube, 3 are him jacking off to whale/dog/fat girl porn, and 12 are of him playing on the ICC doing recordings. Lets say his average game on the ICC was 7 minutes.(he plays 5 minute chess.) He plays about 8.5 games an hour. 8.5 x 12 is 102. The pathetic low life plays 102 games per 12 hours. He uploads about 0-5 blitz videos per day. This means he chooses his best games in which he won(or 1 if he loses if he's desperate and needs the 0.005 dollars he makes per video to save up for his gay porn collection.) He barely posts any of his losses. He has lots of games to pick at to make the unfortunate, clueless viewers to think he is the best chess player on Youtube. Kingscrusher is a fail at chess and should resort to checkers. | |||
== Health == | |||
Kingscrusher suffers from downs sydrome. Downs sydrome is a chromosomal condition caused by the presence of all or part of an extra 21st chromosome, which means Kingscrusher is fucking retarded. Kingscrusher is unable to do simple tasks, like walking up the stairs or riding a bike. His mental conditions are very unstable. He cries himself to sleep each night because he is so pathetic and the best thing he accomplished in his life was winning on time against a grandmaster. He also is sociopathic, antisocial, and enjoys having sexual intercourse with his dog, Kaylie because he is can't get a girl. | |||
== 9/11 Attacks Views == | |||
Kingscrusher has widely supported the 9/11 attacks(or 11/9 in his fucked up country). He has stated in his facebook "So today is September 11th, my favourite day of the year. RIP people on the planes who intended to crash into the evil towers of America. You have weakened them. Thank you." The post was deleted soon after he realized it was wrong and that he was a fat terrorist paki. Kingscrusher is also very racist against Jews, Chinese, Japanese, Canadians and Germans, even though he supported Germany exterminating the Jews. | |||
==How to troll him== | |||
1. Link him to this page<br> | |||
2. Tell him that he will [[Nevar|nevar]] be as good as Kasparov and remind him that his ELO rating is obviously exaggerated by the online chess sites that he frequents.<br> | |||
2. Tell him that he is too fat to ever win a serious competition, even if it's a chess event.<br> | |||
3. [[????|????]]<br> | |||
4. [[Profit!|Profit!]]<br> | |||
==[[Moar|Moar]] trolling== | |||
1. Get to [http://www.chesscube.com/ http://www.chesscube.com] where he has his own public chat room (called KingsCrusher Cafe)<br> | |||
2. [[????|????]]<br> | |||
3. [[Profit!|Profit!]] | |||
==Gallery== | |||
{{cg|Gallery|Kingscrusher|center|<gallery> | |||
Image:Kingscrusher_before.jpg|See the resemblance? Me neither. | |||
Image:Kingscrusher_after.jpg|That's [[Moar|more]] like it. | |||
Image:Kingscrusher.jpg|I suck at chess. | |||
Image:Kcsfluffy.jpg|Kingscrusher's cat named Fluffy. Which shows that he is a [[Furry|furry]], too. | |||
Image:Flush.png|Look alikes | |||
</gallery>}} | |||
==External links== | |||
* [http://www.gtryfon.demon.co.uk/bcc/Author_information/chesscv.htm Kingscrusher's website] | |||
* [http://www.youtube.com/user/kingscrusher/ Kingscrusher's Jewtube Channel] | |||
* [http://kingscrusher.blogspot.com/ Kingscrusher's blog] | |||
* [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Kingscrusher His wiki homepage, extra bonus points if you vandalize it] | |||
* [http://twitter.com/kingscrusher Kingscrusher on Twitter] |
Revision as of 13:31, 15 November 2011
Hey! | This article isn't lulz just yet, but its coverage can spark a lollercoaster. You can help by reverting people who delete shit, and vandalizing their user pages. See this article on Google? Want to add something? Join us! |
Tryfon Costas Gavriel is a fat British Internet celebrity and chess-player. His titles include FIDE Candidate Master (CM)& British Regional Master. Tryfon Gavriel's Youtube channel has had over 7 million views and he is widely considered the worst online chess commentator due to his constant farting and ranting. Gavriel's knowledge and passion for the gayme of chess has helped educate and inspire chess players from all over the world. His other hobbies are watching the latest films, Computing, going out, seeing friends, watching TV.
The beginning
Tryfon got interested in chess through being molested by his father at a young age with chess pieces. He then started playing against him regularly with the chess pieces as he enjoyed it. The openings typically went: e4 e5 Nf3 Nc6 Bc4 Bc5 (The Giuoco Piano!). He thinks this was a simple opening to start playing chess with, although boringly symmetrical. He thinks this explains why he is into the Indian systems, and not the classical systems! Being an arrogant prick, he compares himself with Garry Kasparov on his personal website.
Primary openings
Kingscrusher is experienced in the Kings Indian defence, Svenshnikov sicillian, and plays both d4 and e4 with the white pieces. He has his favourite systems with the white pieces because he is a nazifag.
Career highlights
December 1997: Beat first International Master - IM Danny Kopec (USA) in December London Internationals. The following is the game score:
November 2011: His other career highlight was talking to a girl for the first time. Tryfon asked her on a date and she said "No, you ugly fat bitch." I suppose it wasn't only his ugliness, but he asked her out on Chesscube.com, which really doesn't qualify as talking to a girl. Disregard this then, Kingscrusher has never talked to a girl yet.
Ways of Winning
Kingscrusher's plays on Chesscube. His games are usually won on winning on time in a lost position(because he sucks cock at chess) or performing cheap tricks.
Jewtube Channel
The fat ass also posts youtube videos of playing on the ICC((I) am a (C)ocksucking (C)oont loser so I play here) of him winning on time or using cheap tricks. He also pickpockets his recordings and 99% of his videos are when he wins, and the other 1% when he loses or draws. This is to make the community think he is good at chess. If the fanboy population though for a moment, they would know he sucked based on these calculations:
Kingscrusher is on the computer 18 hours a day. 3 are of him arguing on chesscube, 3 are him jacking off to whale/dog/fat girl porn, and 12 are of him playing on the ICC doing recordings. Lets say his average game on the ICC was 7 minutes.(he plays 5 minute chess.) He plays about 8.5 games an hour. 8.5 x 12 is 102. The pathetic low life plays 102 games per 12 hours. He uploads about 0-5 blitz videos per day. This means he chooses his best games in which he won(or 1 if he loses if he's desperate and needs the 0.005 dollars he makes per video to save up for his gay porn collection.) He barely posts any of his losses. He has lots of games to pick at to make the unfortunate, clueless viewers to think he is the best chess player on Youtube. Kingscrusher is a fail at chess and should resort to checkers.
Health
Kingscrusher suffers from downs sydrome. Downs sydrome is a chromosomal condition caused by the presence of all or part of an extra 21st chromosome, which means Kingscrusher is fucking retarded. Kingscrusher is unable to do simple tasks, like walking up the stairs or riding a bike. His mental conditions are very unstable. He cries himself to sleep each night because he is so pathetic and the best thing he accomplished in his life was winning on time against a grandmaster. He also is sociopathic, antisocial, and enjoys having sexual intercourse with his dog, Kaylie because he is can't get a girl.
9/11 Attacks Views
Kingscrusher has widely supported the 9/11 attacks(or 11/9 in his fucked up country). He has stated in his facebook "So today is September 11th, my favourite day of the year. RIP people on the planes who intended to crash into the evil towers of America. You have weakened them. Thank you." The post was deleted soon after he realized it was wrong and that he was a fat terrorist paki. Kingscrusher is also very racist against Jews, Chinese, Japanese, Canadians and Germans, even though he supported Germany exterminating the Jews.
How to troll him
1. Link him to this page
2. Tell him that he will nevar be as good as Kasparov and remind him that his ELO rating is obviously exaggerated by the online chess sites that he frequents.
2. Tell him that he is too fat to ever win a serious competition, even if it's a chess event.
3. ????
4. Profit!
Moar trolling
1. Get to http://www.chesscube.com where he has his own public chat room (called KingsCrusher Cafe)
2. ????
3. Profit!
Gallery
-
See the resemblance? Me neither.
-
That's more like it.
-
I suck at chess.
-
Kingscrusher's cat named Fluffy. Which shows that he is a furry, too.
-
Look alikes