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Vanessa Hudgens: Difference between revisions
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Vanessa Hudgens is the half Filipina former loli whore girl-next-door star of the insanely popular Disney Channel "movie" High School Musical, which is a load of bullshit. Following several weeks of magazine covers and stories around the movie's sequel and her real-life romance with co-star moptop Zac Efron, the buzz for this tween idol broke into the mainstream with the leak of a nude(OMG!) photo to the internets around September 6th, 2007, confirming without a doubt that she is in fact asking for it.
If you talk to any kid in elementary school, odds are 5 to 1 that they can sing every song from HSM. Who gives a fuck anyways? The plot goes like so: A cute multi-racial girl moves to new school, gets ignored by the popular kids, sparks a flame while singing karaoke with the star jock who really just wants to sing while Nibiru is about to collide with Earth. 12-year-old girls adore this movie, which consists of about 99% googly-eye scenes and 1% tween fluff. It's like Romeo and Juliet, but without the sex, death, drama, or any meaningful content.
Because she is a dumb slut, the squeaky-clean-and-perfect idol for teen girls of the current generation took nude pics of herself and sent them to her boyfriend - who promptly sent them to ebaumsworld. Vanessa Hudgens is a fucktard, a whore and a well-known prostitute, mainly hired by the faggot Zac Effron.
The National Enquirer was the first to report of the photo's existence. Disney Forums cried aloud "V would never do that!!!". Sadly (for her), she did.
Forums were shut down as Anonymous won. While the forums claimed that the pics were fake and that Anonymous were "Porn Obssed Mingers", the photos were confirmed by MSNBC within hours, and later by Fox News. Perez Hilton as usual had his doubts.
Could this mean that Drake Bell is a b/tard?
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Internet Disease
The Original Poster later mysteriously returned and posted the full set - Thread archived on 4chanarchive!.
Repercussions
—Jew, Idiot Los Angeles-area breeder with no control over her kids. | ||
The bitch's forum was raided and goatsed accordingly as Anonymous posted the nude pictures everywhere. The admin of the site, Auie, went emo and begged the raiders to stop, announcing that "V would never do that".
After a few hours, the post count of the forum was doubled. Despite the admin's threats, few raiders actually got banned. This is what happens if the entire moderation crew consists of 12 year old girls. The power of goatse had made it impossible for them to even look at the forum. Anon provided lulz and drama ensued. Bricks were shat, and on September 8th the forum was officially shut down as 12-year-old girls worldwide were reduced to tears. Some even became an heros.
Disney has signed Vanessa up for High School Musical III due for release in 2008.
Never mind, she's fired.
Or maybe she isn't fired?
Or maybe she is?
Ah no, she's not. Lucky slut.
THINK OF THE CHILDREN
The funniest thing about this shitload of drama is it is probably a publicity stunt. Look at Daniel Radcliff, he got moar attention by fucking a horse than from his latest movie, Harry Potter and the Hidden Sausage. Also, look at Paris Hilton, a cum-guzzling thunder cunt whom noone cared about before, but is now IRL famous for sucking some C-list director's knob.
It's viral marketing.
The pattern was as follows, generating the most epic of coverage.
- Pictures rumored to exist.
- Denial by Fanbase that aforementioned pics could exist.
- Discussion in the Press of said photos possible existence.
- Pictures Mysteriously Surface a few days later.
- Acknowledgement of Authenticity from Agent - could they not have claimed they were a looky-likey?
- Moar Press Coverage.
- ????
- Profit!
Only problem is this is a kid's idol. People look up to her. And she has more or less said, "FUCK YOU ALL. I HATE YOU, PERSONALLY. BYE" to all of her fans. There are still many butthurt mothers out there posting on AOL news posts about the newds. Anonymous is responding to the mother's lament by saying Vanessa is too old, and that he would like their 8-year-old daughter instead. The media will probably try and crucify Vanessa for being a whore, but what's really wrong with showing off your tits? It is highly unlikely that she herself posted her newds on ebaums (Anon forbid). So why is she guilty? Because she allowed herself to be naked on the internets? Think of the children. However, this only proves that rule 34 remains unbroken.
Possible Theories
- Vanessa is a /b/tard.
- Zac is a /b/tard.
- Zac saw the pics, got extremely turned off by them due to the fact that he is a fag, and handed them to a NON GAY MAN, who was in fact a /b/tard.
- Vanessa's Agent is a /b/tard
- Zac showed the pics to a friend who stole them. Zac's friend is a /b/tard
- College Musical.
- Retirement Musical.
- Kate McCann stole the pics and posted them to try and distract the world from the fact that she killed her fucking daughter.
- Jews did it, LULZ.
- Jews did Zac Efron
- She didn't want people to find out about that god-awful movie based on the shitty 60s puppet show she had a supporting role in.
When questioned, the OP claimed that - he "had heard that there was nude pics of Vanessa, so looked around and 'found them'...lying around on the web.'"
- Doesn't sound very credible.
New Developments
- It was later suggested in a news report that Vanessa took the nude pictures of herself before she was famous for Nickelodeon star Drake Bell.
That means the now-18-year-old Vanessa was probably 15 or 16 when the photos were taken. In other words, you are all pedophiles.
- Drake stars in the Nickelodeon show "Drake and Josh".
Fan Response
—13 year old girls the defense rests | ||
—Vanessa-hudgens.com's response to the raiding | ||
A challenger appears?
Fellow Disney moneymaker Adrienne Bailon, one of the Cheetah Girls, now has her own nudies floating around somewhere on the Internets, but are yet to be found - because the faggot who stole the photos wanted them all to himself. Cheetah Slut apologized to all of her fans.
August 5th, 2009: The Bitch Still Hasn't Learned
—Anonymous | ||
The Disney whore is mother fucking at it again. Miss Hudgens has "accidentally" even more nude pics. Now that High School Musical is done, Vanessa has found that the internet provides the attention that she so desperately requires. Eleven have been found so far, and who the fuck knows how many others there may be. By now, the pictures have reached her amazing parents and they've laid down strict punishments out for her like:
- Giving her a new phone to take more pictures with.
- Taking her nude pictures for her.
- Helping her film her Sex Tape.
- Suggesting professional photography for her next session.
While these pictures may please Anonymous, the people they please even more are her fans. They simply can't get enough of seeing their idol without clothes on. The parents of the fanbase also agree that what Vanessa is doing is a great thing and that with more pictures like this, the war in Sudan and the Holocaust can be stopped. Hopefully if her next picture set generates enough money, she can get rid of her lopsided breasts and not have to try and cover them with her hair. Some also speculate that the reason the pictures are blurry, is simply because she is a beautiful, artistic girl who is trying to express herself through the use of nude modeling.
Although some pictures are nude, Anonymous has found these pictures rather controversial, stating:
We can probably expect some fuck up excuse that the pictures weren't meant to be seen by the public and all will be forgiven by her loyal High School Musical fanbase.
It should be noted that in one of the pictures she can be seen holding a Motorola "RAZR". Considering this make of phone came out in 2005, it's safe to presume these pictures were taken around then. Simple math dictates that this means she is 16 in the pictures. In other words, you're still a Disney paedophile.
What we can all look forward to in the future is the release of her sex tape and maybe pictures of a shaved vagina.
August 10, 2009: The bitch gets called out
Being made fun of by Dane Cook is roughly the equivilent of having your dead grandparents dragged up and raped in front of you.
Observe as the walking Uncyclopedia adds insult to injury.
Gallery
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I'll just leave these here -
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Oh Gabriella!
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In the Louvre -
ZOMG, it's REEEAAAALLLLL!!111 -
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Fans discuss some of her earlier work. -
...But she did! -
I will check you for cancer V -
handy instructions on leaving her a snapvine message -
The bitch knows now -
soon... -
How this is motivational? I don't know. -
The mysterious OP returns with Moar -
Suspicious? -
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Her other MySpace to avoid the meanies. -
Coming soon to a Dollar tree near you. -
"FUCK YOU ALL. I HATE YOU, PERSONALLY. BYE" -
Vanessa Hudgen's website getting comment raeped -
If you think that's bad, remember this? -
V cosplaying as a sailor scout notice something unusual? -
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WouldNeverDoThat.jpg)
Link
- Vanessa's MySpace - Be sure to PM her and compliment her on her hairy muff
- Her alternative, private account
used to avoid the mean comments,canceled from too much fail. - Vanessa´s forum.
It´s not possible to register, because the place is being raided and goatsed as we speak.Registration is back up.No, it's back down again.(but comments are back up on the main site) Vanessa's new forum - JewTube's biggest HSM fanbitch - Raid for the LULZ!
- Vanessa demonstrates the uses of a soapy vibrator
See Also
- Angie Varona
- East High School Leopards Football Rape Team
- Boobs
- /b/
- Paris Hilton
- Slut
- Lolo Ferrari
- High School Musical
- The Jonas Brothers
- Ashley Greene
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Vanessa Hudgens is part of a series on Visit the Sex Portal for complete coverage. |
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Vanessa Hudgens is part of a series on Visit the Whores Portal for complete coverage. |
| Featured article September 10, 2007 | ||
| Preceded by Bayeux Tapestry |
Vanessa Hudgens | Succeeded by 9/11 |
| Featured article October 18, 2008 | ||
| Preceded by Dadagiri |
Vanessa Hudgens | Succeeded by Forumwarz |