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Max Harris: Difference between revisions

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{{FactAlert|Max finally realised that nobody likes his music, and, in a fit of self-loathing and shame, made his [[Jewtube]] videos private!}}
Max Harris is, like many of today's youths, a gigantic [[faggot]]. And, like many of today's gigantic faggots, Max Harris thinks that he is a [[hipster|deep]], [[retarded|intelligent]], [[shit|talented]] yet troubled, wounded [[Aurora_Theatre_Shooting|dark knight]]. Oh, did we mention that he's also a [[fat|fat bastard]]?
Max Harris is, like many of today's youths, a gigantic [[faggot]]. And, like many of today's gigantic faggots, Max Harris thinks that he is a [[hipster|deep]], [[retarded|intelligent]], [[shit|talented]] yet troubled, wounded [[Aurora_Theatre_Shooting|dark knight]]. Oh, did we mention that he's also a [[fat|fat bastard]]?



Revision as of 22:11, 28 July 2012

FACT ALERT:
Max finally realised that nobody likes his music, and, in a fit of self-loathing and shame, made his Jewtube videos private!

Max Harris is, like many of today's youths, a gigantic faggot. And, like many of today's gigantic faggots, Max Harris thinks that he is a deep, intelligent, talented yet troubled, wounded dark knight. Oh, did we mention that he's also a fat bastard?

One day, during one of his many crying fits on his father's bed after just being brutally sodomized, he drew inspiration and courage from his father's semen dribbling out of his bruised, puckered asshole. Thus, Max Harris Music was born, an abhorant Jewtube channel that contains the highly retarded song, "Stronger", which simply features a low-res, black and white picture of Max Harris looking brooding and troubled. The song itself is pitiful, and is full of fail and AIDS.

PRIVATISED, NO MIRRORS


However, the channel also contains the far more lulzy song, "High", in which Max has been kind enough to produce a god-awful music video to accompany the "music", culminating in three of your senses being raped, as you can literally taste fecal matter while viewing.

Oh sweet christ, it's almost too perfect.

The lyrics primarily consist of him singing about how he wants to do heroin and that he doesn't afraid of anything, while sensually grinding against the brick wall of his house in his back garden, utilising a wide-angle lens so we can see just how unpleasant this fucker is. Bonus lulz for the scene where he pretends to break down and cry.

   
 
I'm singing! Someone help me, please help me, help me! *sob*
 

 
 

—Max Harris, on his inability to sing.


Oh, and he also attempts to do pop-style street dancing in the alley next to his house, as well as nestling the camera in the grass and having it look up at him, showing that he is completely incapable of filming fuck all as the light from the sky makes it impossible to see his face. Plus all the fucking grass in the way.

Max Harris is the perfect example of a modern tweenage boy, proving that all males his age must be lined up and summarily shot, with extreme prejudice. Nice going, Max Harris, you're the new type specimen for human vermin.


See Also

External Links


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