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Fukushima: Difference between revisions
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{{spoiler|Fukushima could bring about the end of the world and the only solution to the problem is build a giant pyramid tomb}} | {{spoiler|Fukushima could bring about the end of the world and the only solution to the problem is build a giant pyramid tomb}} | ||
[[File:The_Pyramid_Tomb_of_Chernobyl.jpg|thumb|left|What are the [[evolution|descendants]] of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Western_world civilization] going to think of [[you|our]] [[Gay|weak]] [[Egypt|pyramids]] [[9000]] years from now after [[2012]] happens?]] | |||
Back in 2011, an earthquake and tsunami hit [[Japan]] and things changed forever. Any well-read [[EDiot]] is familiar with the drama associate with the [[Japan Crisis of 2011]]. | Back in 2011, an earthquake and tsunami hit [[Japan]] and things changed forever. Any well-read [[EDiot]] is familiar with the drama associate with the [[Japan Crisis of 2011]]. To sum it up, besides effectively screwing Japan as hard as it has been since [[WWII]] by Allied forces that [[Lulz|took away their hard won colonies]], nuked Nagasaki and Hiroshima, and planned to [http://www.usawildlife.com/bat_bombs.htm unleash bats] onto Tokyo, that was not the only [[drama]] to occur that day. At 3:26 pm on March 11th, 2011 a wall of water got into the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear power plant and [[Raped|destroyed]] Japan's [[economy]] forever. In fact this is so bad, [http://www.fairewinds.com/content/tokyo-soil-samples-would-be-considered-nuclear-waste-us Tokyo's soil is contaminated to the level of what would be classified as nuclear waste in the United States]. You can imagine the [[drama|political and economic ramifications of a mass evacuation]] of the greater Tokyo Area. And that is only the current bad news—as nuclear meltdowns can always go from bad to much worse. For example, a fuel tank in Reactor Unit 4 contains [[9000|5000]] times the amount of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cesium_137 Cesium 137] than the bomb dropped on Hiroshima. [[You|One]] could imagine the [[Global warming|environmental ramifications]] if this were to blow up or get hit by another wall of water. | ||
A group of [[NORPs|retired engineers, nuclear experts, construction workers, and other volunteers]] have formed an organization called [http://svcf.jp/english Skilled Veterans Corps for Fukushima (SVCF)]. Their main objective is simple: [[Kamikaze| sacrifice their bodies]] so younger workers don't have to be exposed to radiation as the SVCF is commissioned to build a [[Egypt|giant pyramid tomb]] to forever contain the [[Clusterfuck|mess]] that is Fukushima Daiichi—[http://svcf.jp/english/fundamental_en no this isn't | A group of [[NORPs|retired engineers, nuclear experts, construction workers, and other volunteers]] have formed an organization called [http://svcf.jp/english Skilled Veterans Corps for Fukushima (SVCF)]. Their main objective is simple: [[Kamikaze| sacrifice their bodies]] so [[you|younger workers]] don't have to be exposed to radiation as the SVCF is commissioned to build a [[Egypt|giant pyramid tomb]] to forever contain the [[Clusterfuck|mess]] that is Fukushima Daiichi—[http://svcf.jp/english/fundamental_en no this part isn't satire], this is [[Ebonics|straight real talk]]. So far this project has accomplished very little because of a [[Old Media| corporate media]] [[Censorship|blackout]] that is being pushed by [[The Man|International Atomic Energy Association]] [http://www.iaea.org/ (IAEA)] and nuclear energy companies in the [http://www.pge.com/ United States] and [http://www.tepco.co.jp/en/index-e.html Japan] that don't want you to know that every time we have a meltdown we have to crank out [[Zerg rush|cannon fodder]] and [http://www.aljazeera.com/news/europe/2012/10/201210364027239914.html billions of dollars] to compensate the mess each time. [[The Man|They]] also don't want [[you]] to know that the only way [[Science|we can even begin to learn about the true costs of nuclear meltdowns is by examining them as they happen]]—meaning [[you|anyone]] can really be an [[expert]] on [[science|this issue]] and all the [[Bailout plan|numbers]] it includes. | ||
==The | ==[[The Man]] with the plan== | ||
[[File:Yastel_Yamada.jpg|thumb|right|[[Badass|This man]] is one of the leading [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liquidators liquidators] [[An Hero|will probably die from exposure to radioactive ruins]].]] | [[File:Yastel_Yamada.jpg|thumb|right|[[Badass|This man]] is one of the leading [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liquidators liquidators] [[An Hero|will probably die from exposure to radioactive ruins]].]] | ||
[[An Hero|Yastel Yamada]] is the co-founder of the [http://svcf.jp/english SVCF] and is currently on a series of tours promoting that political pressure needs to be put on by Japan to [[Zerg rush|send relevant retired specialists and volunteers at the nuclear facility]] in an attempt to build a [[Egypt|giant pyramid tomb]]. The one in [[Japan]] will be much bigger than the piece of shit already built in Chernobyl that will need an additional 1 billion dollars to make it even bigger. | [[An Hero|Yastel Yamada]] is the co-founder of the [http://svcf.jp/english SVCF] and is currently on a series of tours promoting that political pressure needs to be put on by Japan to [[Zerg rush|send relevant retired specialists and volunteers at the nuclear facility]] in an attempt to build a [[Egypt|giant pyramid tomb]]. The one in [[Japan]] will be much bigger than the piece of shit already built in Chernobyl that will need an additional 1 billion dollars to make it even bigger. | ||
==So what is Yastel Yamada's plan?== | ==So what is Yastel Yamada's plan?== | ||
[[Shit bricks|Well there really isn't a plan]]. The reality about nuclear meltdowns is all [[science]] knows about how to deal with meltdowns is based on the previous two nuclear meltdowns, but this lack of knowledge isn't going to be a problem. | [[Shit bricks|Well there really isn't a plan]]. The reality about nuclear meltdowns is all [[science]] knows about how to deal with meltdowns is based on the previous two nuclear meltdowns, but this lack of knowledge isn't going to be a problem. First, since this is a relatively new subject, [[you|anyone]] can be an [[science|expert on nuclear meltdowns]]. Second, we are going to have a larger pull of data every 25 years or so. This two features will allow [[You|scientists]] to have [[science|new research material]] to [[education|learn]] the [[NORPS|populace]] more about the cost of nuclear meltdowns resulting from violating the most important rule in real-estate: [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diablo_Canyon_Power_Plant location], [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Indian_Point_Energy_Center location], [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vermont_Yankee location]. | ||
=Three Mile Island= | =Three Mile Island= | ||
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*This new pyramid tomb was suppose to be completed in 2005, but they'll get around to beginning construction eventually. | *This new pyramid tomb was suppose to be completed in 2005, but they'll get around to beginning construction eventually. | ||
=Fukushima= | |||
==External Links== | ==External Links== |
Revision as of 01:16, 26 October 2012
Hey! | This article is an Encyclopedia Dramatica exclusive. This article is only for the discriminating lulz connoisseur. If you have any exclusive drama to add, click here. |
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Back in 2011, an earthquake and tsunami hit Japan and things changed forever. Any well-read EDiot is familiar with the drama associate with the Japan Crisis of 2011. To sum it up, besides effectively screwing Japan as hard as it has been since WWII by Allied forces that took away their hard won colonies, nuked Nagasaki and Hiroshima, and planned to unleash bats onto Tokyo, that was not the only drama to occur that day. At 3:26 pm on March 11th, 2011 a wall of water got into the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear power plant and destroyed Japan's economy forever. In fact this is so bad, Tokyo's soil is contaminated to the level of what would be classified as nuclear waste in the United States. You can imagine the political and economic ramifications of a mass evacuation of the greater Tokyo Area. And that is only the current bad news—as nuclear meltdowns can always go from bad to much worse. For example, a fuel tank in Reactor Unit 4 contains 5000 times the amount of Cesium 137 than the bomb dropped on Hiroshima. One could imagine the environmental ramifications if this were to blow up or get hit by another wall of water.
A group of retired engineers, nuclear experts, construction workers, and other volunteers have formed an organization called Skilled Veterans Corps for Fukushima (SVCF). Their main objective is simple: sacrifice their bodies so younger workers don't have to be exposed to radiation as the SVCF is commissioned to build a giant pyramid tomb to forever contain the mess that is Fukushima Daiichi—no this part isn't satire, this is straight real talk. So far this project has accomplished very little because of a corporate media blackout that is being pushed by International Atomic Energy Association (IAEA) and nuclear energy companies in the United States and Japan that don't want you to know that every time we have a meltdown we have to crank out cannon fodder and billions of dollars to compensate the mess each time. They also don't want you to know that the only way we can even begin to learn about the true costs of nuclear meltdowns is by examining them as they happen—meaning anyone can really be an expert on this issue and all the numbers it includes.
The Man with the plan
Yastel Yamada is the co-founder of the SVCF and is currently on a series of tours promoting that political pressure needs to be put on by Japan to send relevant retired specialists and volunteers at the nuclear facility in an attempt to build a giant pyramid tomb. The one in Japan will be much bigger than the piece of shit already built in Chernobyl that will need an additional 1 billion dollars to make it even bigger.
So what is Yastel Yamada's plan?
Well there really isn't a plan. The reality about nuclear meltdowns is all science knows about how to deal with meltdowns is based on the previous two nuclear meltdowns, but this lack of knowledge isn't going to be a problem. First, since this is a relatively new subject, anyone can be an expert on nuclear meltdowns. Second, we are going to have a larger pull of data every 25 years or so. This two features will allow scientists to have new research material to learn the populace more about the cost of nuclear meltdowns resulting from violating the most important rule in real-estate: location, location, location.
Three Mile Island
- The cleanup project lasted from August 1979 - December 1993
- It had a 1 billion dollar cleanup
- 140,000 people were evacuated.
Chernobyl
- Chernobyl released 50-80 million Curies
- 400 times more radiation than Hiroshima
- 350,000 people displaced
- Total number of Chernobyl liquidators was 600,000. 50 to 10,000 of these liquidators have died from the job depending on who you ask.
- The total cost for Chernobyl was 235 billion dollars.
- A new pyramid tomb needs to be built over the current sarcophagus that will cost an estimated 1 billion dollars.
- This new pyramid tomb was suppose to be completed in 2005, but they'll get around to beginning construction eventually.
Fukushima
External Links
- Skilled Veterans Corps for Fukushima English Website
- A Northern California group collecting data
- A rouge group of scientists, engineers, and hackers based in Japan collecting data about hotspots