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| [[File:bald01.jpg|thumb|Paula, in dire need of a proper shave]]
| | Balddumborat is the canon voice of [[Deryp Hooves| Derpy]] from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. |
| [[File:TooShaved.png|thumb|I'm so [[fat|deep...]]]]
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| [[File:bald02.jpg|thumb|Being a fugly failure at life and disappointment to your family is perfectly acceptable, as long as you can still morph into multiple [[fursona]] characters.]]
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| '''Balddumborat''' (also known as Paula "I do it for the money" Wilkinson) is yet another sick fuck stemming from the endless pool of cancer that forms the [[Furfag|furry fandom]]. Becoming slightly internet famous [[at least 100 years ago|at least 100 years ago]], when she stopped copying manga and hentai book drawings on [[Y!Gallery|Y!Gallery]] and started drawing the [[Kill it with Fire|sickest shit]] a human being can imagine and depict on paper, she then increased her popularity among mostly 40 year old [[basement dweller|virgins]] who like to sit in their mom's basement all day and jack off to badly drawn [[sick fuck|pokemon furry porn]] and the like. Funny thing is, she actually earns Jew gold through before mentioned drawing engagement.
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| {{quote|I find most furries to be stupid whiny idiots who pay their parent's money for badly drawn porn. And guess what? I cash in on that. <3 |Balddumborat}}
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| ==Personality==
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| [[File:bald_lesbian.jpg|right|thumb|D'awww, underage lesbian relationship ^__^]]
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| [[File:bald_begging01.jpg|right|thumb|You know that you [[srsly|srsly]] fucked up in life when you have to beg for IRL fecebook friends on Yaoi Gallery]]
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| [[File:BDRMan.png|left|thumb|Doing a shitty fan voice is a perfectly good reason not to [[DO IT FAGGOT|become the gender you say you are.]]]]
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| On her [http://www.furaffinity.net/user/balddumborat main Furaffinity Account] she's referring to herself as a [[Hir|"pansexual/gender-neutral oriented"]] person, which basically suggests that she takes [[Slut|everything]] up her ass/cunt as long as it has a functioning brain, including dicks of all shapes, sizes and species. So far so furry, but there's moar of course.
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| Like most other furries, she meets the typical egomaniac and [[Jew|manipulative behavioral]]-type persona you would expect from one of these folks, going as far as [[writing yourself into an article|to writing most of her own ED article]], since "the troll who originally wrote it sucked at their job", but still throwing a bitchfit when somebody links to her ED page.
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| She claims that she's [http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/1641459/ psychic] and apparently when she's not drawing or getting off to sick porn, she sits on her fat ass playing [[WoW|World of Warcraft]] all day, and even [http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/1781518/ nerd rages] about it.
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| Despite her [http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/1113360/ countless abominated sexual fetishes], she also likes to draw and imagine highly perverted [[Guro|guro]] porn variations of all kinds. Yes, she's actually that sick and desperate to enjoy such shitty semi-porn artwork. She gets off to that shit all the time.
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| Only [[Raptor Jesus|Raptor Jesus]] knows what other things rest inside the private part of her Furraffinity profile.
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| Not content with making [[Irony|Pansexuals look bad]], she now claims to be a "transman".
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| {{quote|It’s still rude to say someone isn’t a certain gender unless they have a matching body for it. |Balddumborat, on why never having a penis makes you no less of a man}}
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| Paula is a master attention whore. First, she seeds the area with [[stupid|radical]] opinions, bashes something popular like [[Jew|Christmas]] or [[Terrorist|America]], or stands up for a [[Lil Miss Jay|sick fuck]] after he got banned from Tumblr for making [[Pedophile|underage]] [[Yiff|pony porn]], [[art theft|using other people's art for a commission]], and being [[USI|"better than da Vinci"]]. Then whenever someone dares say anything about her, her [[lies|views]], or any cause she [[bullshit|cares about]], she will respond with a [[tl;dr|verbose]] [[BAW|counterargument]] and then has her fat ass thoroughly licked by her [[white knights|close friends]] for hours after the vile troll who dared disagree with the brilliant BaldDumboRat. She then posts a quick blurb about how her fans should stop attacking people on her behalf to look good, then repeats the whole thing. When that does not work, she posts [[emo| vague and dark]] [[BAW|posts]], [[Camwhore|pictures]], and [[porn|art]] to get her followers' attention.
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| ==Drawing shit==
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| Paula mainly draws [[Anthro|animals]], preferably for her customers in multiple sexual posses, doing fucked up furry stuff. Laughably she calls these feeble insults for real artists actually her[[O RLY|"Art"]] and quickly morphs into butthurt mode as soon as anybody [[NO U|claims otherwise]]. Examples of this fine, so-called "Art" of hers can be easily found on such sites as [[Paheal|Paheal]], 'Booru and so on.
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| Aside from her furry porn income, she also has a bunch of unimportant and lame-ass fursona/custom characters which fulfill all things she couldn't obtain IRL.
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| {{cg|Disgusting semi-artwork|gall|center|<gallery>
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| <center><gallery>
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| Image:balddumborat_drawing01.png|One of her totally hot and fappable quality comics
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| Image:balddumborat_drawing02.png|I'm 12 and that's not Pikachu...
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| Image:DeadPonyLuna.png|FAPFAPFAPFAP
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| Image:bald_pron1.jpg|
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| </gallery>|<gallery>
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| Image:bald_pron2.jpg
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| Image:bald_pron03.png
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| Image:BDRdickguro.png|This is what she does in her basement
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| Image:bald_guro02.png|Mhh, dead Ponies. Totally sexy
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| Image:bald_concept01.jpg|For furries, this stuff is [[OH WOW|quite hot and creative]]. For normal and sane people it's not.
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| Image:bald_guro01.jpg|[http://rattiesketches.blogspot.com/ Taken straight from her shitty blog]
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| </gallery>}}
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| == Little Girl Rape ==
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| [[File:bald_request.png|right|thumb|Paula asking Furraffinity-Admin "Dragoneer" wether submitting lolicon artwork is legal on his site]]
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| [[File:BDRMotive.png|right|thumb|According to Paula, being cute justifies murder.]]
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| Additionally, she's quite a fan of [[Lolicon|lolicon]] porn, as her once loli [http://www.furaffinity.net/view/2155395/ Pichu] who was aged up for Furraffinity would CLEARLY show. This also means she likes [[rape|raping]] and [[murder|murdering]] little girls.
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| {{quote|Small Edit: Pichu is no longer a cub. She is now a partial micro, being very tiny because she is a mouse, but her genitalia are indeed that of an adult. She's a "baby" pokemon who refuses to evolve, and we all know even a baby form of a pokemon can become level 100. So she can stay a pichu but become a mature adult.
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| So yes, she is now a very tiny gal, and not a cub. |Paula saying it's A-Okay to slap tits on a little girl for her to be an adult.}}
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| She also made a long rant trying to defend the sick fuck pedophiles [http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/997141/ here].
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| {{quote|Now, I do not support pedophilia in the least, but I don't think these people ARE pedophiles.
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| Why do I think this?
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| Because sometimes I like shota/lolita/cub. But I would never EVER think that way of a real child in any way shape or form. I detest that kind of thing, because I myself was abused like that as a kid. I would report it and try my best to protect said child if something bad happened to them. I dislike pedophiles, because they are taking advantage of someone that's too young to fight for themselves or know any better. |Hypocritical cunt much?}}
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| {{quote|I simply have a creative mind that is not blockaded by society's definition of 'right'.|Balddumborat}}
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| {{cg|Child Rape Art|gall|center|<gallery>
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| <center><gallery>
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| Image:PichuGore3.png
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| Image:PichuGore4.png
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| Image:PichuGore5.png
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| Image:PichuGore6.png
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| </gallery>|<gallery>
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| Image:PichuGore7.png
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| Image:pichugurololi.png
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| Image:PichuGore1.png
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| Image:PichuGore2.png
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| </gallery>}}
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| ==Redneck Family==
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| Paula was [[Fresh Prince of Bel-Air|born and raised]] in the underpopulated and boring shithole that is known as [[Portland|Portland]] City Area. Particularly, she was raised in [[Beaver|Beaverton]] and spent her childhood days in said [[hipster]] shithole. This might very well has been a dramatic catalyst for the later to follow-development of her, let's call it "[[Sick fuck|tastes]]".
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| Being the immature overaging [[babyfur|crybaby]] she is, Paula managed multiple times in the past to piss [[Goofy Time|her dad]] off to a point where he's given her [http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/674450/ death threats]. She's a bastard child because her father got horny, fucked her crazy mom because she was easy, and 9 months later Paula was born. Due to this, her mother's also a quite [[batshit insane|psychotic person]], as Paula states in [http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/2324899/ her journals], spelling errors included:
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| {{quote|I just hope lack of sleep doesn't collapse into a manic episode, my mom's had them 3 times and she warned me lack of sleep was a sign one might be approaching. Urghh, doctor said it would be unlikely for me to have bi-polar but it's still a chance since my mom has it.|Paula, confessing how she's going batshit insane with a bipolar personality disorder because of some unimportant shit}}
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| By the way, it's a confirmed fact that Paula loves [[Fucktard|her Pets actually moar than her family members]], as she has stated multiple times, like in [http://www.furaffinity.net/view/3813351/ this entry] for example.
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| [[Shit nobody cares about|At this point, she owns one bunny, some rats and at some point in time she even found a kitteh on the streets which she heroically saved until it died]] because it had to live in that filthy shithole apartment with Paula's furry roommates who [[Animal abuse|abused]] it all day long.
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| ==Youtube Faggotry ==
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| Because [[12 year olds|all cool people]] are there, Paula decided with her [http://ubuntuforums.org/showthread.php?t=1377947 mad 1337 PC and internet kowledge] to join in the fun on [[Youtube|Jewtube]] some months ago. So far she possesses three accounts that are filled with her [[Cancer|faggotry]].
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| The first one, named BaldRattie, is a quite shitty depiction that provides an uninteresting glimpse into what is supposed to be her "daily life" or something like that. [[Shit nobody cares about|On this account, countless shitty AMVs and some weaboo stuff along with shitty homemade private videos of her pets can be found.]] Interestingly, she has subscribed to the Channel of Anthony "Starlight" Taylor, a confirmed [[GodofUnicorns|Horsefucker]], on said account.
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| However, her second account is named after her [[Balddumborat|main nick]] and was [[Fail|empty most of the time]] until this April. It was then that he was quickly <strike>instrumentalized</strike> (What the fuck this isn't even a word.) to help spreading her recently produced [[MLP|Pony]] Voiceovers, causing [[Fangasm|fangasms]] of her former furry companions and those relatively [[Normal people|normal users]] who don't know of her other activities yet. In relation with this came [http://www.youtube.com/user/PierceSmoulder another pony-related account] which is supposed to depict some sort of lame-ass OC character.
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| [[File:balddumbobutthurt.jpg|right|thumb]]
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| <center>
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| {{fv|BaldRattie-youtube|background-color: transparent;|font-weight: normal;
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| |'''Some rant about religious stuff'''<br /><youtube>JGKzQKCw_tw</youtube>
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| |'''There is no use in hiding your face when you've already got your own page on ED. Stupid cunt much?'''<br /><youtube>iYoWraKcARQ</youtube>
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| |'''Oh Lawdy is dat sum webcamz'''<br /><youtube>xP-91-Lzsjw</youtube>|'''Some retarded horse crying'''<br /><youtube>aK_L5kTIiXs</youtube>
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| |'''If anything, Paula should stick to the singing business, as this video from her weaboo phase in 2007 proves'''<br /><youtube>lZkuS3aSOoA</youtube>
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| }}
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| </center>
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| == Furry Denial and first encounter with Anon ==
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| Soon after the mentioned Pony Faggotry started, Anon [[Hackers on steroids|got track]] on Paula and [[google|dug]] into the shithole that formed her activities from the past, which were spread all across the internets. He was able to extract a lot of valuable [[Dox|information]] due to [[Google|Paula's fucktarded, non existant knowledge of internet]] [[Internet Detective|privacy]]. This is contrary to Paula's claim that she's a "clever girl" who "cashes in on the stupidity" of her furry friends/customers. After a few rounds of [[Internet Drama|bitching around]] on teh Tubes, however, soon after she realized what she was [[Oh shit|riding herself]] in to, Paula decided to do what countless furries already did [[Delete fucking everything|before]]: She thought that a massive blocking action on Jewtube against her opponents would be quite an [[No|effective and helping]] step, which was of course a highly failing assumption, due to the fact that you can't simply kill a hydra with killing just one of her multiple [[Anonymous|heads]]. Silly Paula.
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| Also, as a first impact generated by this very article, it seems like Paula deleted at least one of her private Profiles. Her Facebook page seems to have been sealed off very recently, with her account no moar listed in the Database, despite Paula knowing that all relevant information about her was already leeched and secured quite a long time ago. Silly Paula.
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| {{spoiler|She's actually not a furry and doesn't enjoy all this sick shit at all! She's doing it entirely for teh moniez only, you have to believe!!!!1111}}
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| [[File:Bald bawscreen.jpg|right|thumb]]
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| [[File:NotAFurry.png|right|thumb|[[Sarcasm|Not a furry, people]]]]
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| {{quote|"Yes, yes I am doing this for the money.
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| I was first on Y! Gallery drawing nothing but humans. Heck, if you went to my FA and looked at the very first things I drew, they looked like utter shit and I went to furry auction sites because in my head I went "I'm not making sales. Furries seem to buy a lot of shit. I'm going to get good at drawing furry and see what happens." I dedicated myself to improving drawing furs, and I hit a bit of a jackpot when I started drawing pokemon, so I kept going with that.
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| It was tough at first, but the promise of drawing absolutely anything drew even the freakiest of people because they were usually denied by other artists. Last week, I made 700 dollars in 2 days by making a comic auction and opening up all types of commissions on my list.
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| Last year, I was able to draw in 2,000 dollars in a month.
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| It's an economy in my eyes, and something to keep me afloat until I can pursue my real career. Once I get a job and save my own money, I really don't plan on doing commissions, except maybe a couple here and there to make a quick buck.
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| Not only that, but being commissioned to draw obscure things and characters has been a great way to help my art boost in quality over the years.
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| The closest thing I have to a fursuit isn't even a furry, it's a cosplay from an obscure anime "Paranoia Agent". I don't even categorize it as furry because it's a costume based on a freaky plush toy. And besides that, I have about 8 other cosplays that I've worn and enjoyed wearing, more than that hot sweaty annoying pink dog thing that I can only stand to wear for maybe 2-3 hours before getting really irritated.
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| If you actually did research, you'd notice my accounts before FA only had human characters on them. I had no real interest in furries, and I've stated a few times in other places that I joined and stayed because I was making money where I wasn't anywhere else.
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| But, you know, just letting you know, piling generic furry insults on furry ponies wont make them change. It's not like furries havnt seen those comments before, so you and whoever else thinks this little group movement is somehow doing anything, you really need to work on your tactics.
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| This is mediocre trolling at best. I mean, seriously, even the furries are starting to use the term furfag, and they've adapted to making fun of anyone who says that overused term. And they're pretty used to people having complete and stupid assumptions, and because that's just what they are, they preeetty much ignore it or laugh at the fact that those people are completely wrong.
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| And again, as said on my page before, I've seen more furries raging about ponies than actually liking ponies. So you might want to lurk moar." |TL;DR: "I'm a fucking furry bitch, please raep my face"!}}
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| ==Writing==
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| Paula, since [[BAW|nobody ever understands her]], took to making stories. Of course, since she knew that nobody would want to read her emo shit, she did what all [[fantard|revolutionary creative geniuses]] do: made a Tumblr draw blog. Cashing in on not one but two [[Brony|shitty]] [[Doctor Who|fandoms]], Paula set up the Tumblr blog [http://http://askdiscordwhooves.tumblr.com Discord Whooves] by taking a popular character, making him a suicidal horse that fucks everything that moves, quickly attracting emos, britfags, and furries. Not wanting to be associated with a [[Balddumborat|furry whore]], she took the name "Jitterbug Jive", which she held onto until she was outed by somebody doing a Google Image search. Desperate to make her [[Porn|shitty story]] look less just rampant fanart and yiff-material, Paula drew on a brooding past full of [[First World Problems||tragic events]] and terrible [[Narcissistic personality disorder|mental illnesses]] that were only discovered [[Self-diagnosed|by the best doctors]], spent countless hours [[Fapping|pouring over]] [[Wikipedia|the most credible psychiatric journals]] to give nuance to her [[Mary Sue|characters]], so don't you be telling her that her stuff if crap, published author, or that it is offensive, rape victim, since Paula is the [[Special Snowflake Syndrome|only one]] who understands the true greatness of her blog. Despite her [[fanfic|blog]] being made almost entirely out of characters [[Doctor Who|somebody]] [[Derpy|else]] [[My Little Pony| made]], Paula WILL flip her shit if you say that she did not make them. Although, given that they are just preexisting characters with whitewashed with inconsistent one-dimensional personalities straight out of [[TVTropes|the big book of cliches]] rendered in grey and [[shit|brown smudges]], she might actually be able to take credit for these [[original character|original characters]]. She later [[Roman shower|rinsed]] and [http://ask-zerumwhooves.tumblr.com repeated this whole thing], with the same [[Yiff|concept]] and [[Mary Sue|character]] [[emo|design]] for the same [[sick fuck|demographic]].
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| == Gallery ==
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| {{cg|Gallery of Baldness|gall|center|<gallery>
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| <center><gallery>
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| Image:bald_posing01.jpg|Fugly Raep Faic
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| Image:bald_rat01.jpg|"Hell man, i'd still prefer hitting that stupid rat than this chick!"
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| Image:bald_posing02.jpg|School Photo from 2007
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| Image:BDRCrossdress.jpg|It is lead to believe she actually has a hairy set of balls
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| </gallery>|<gallery>
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| Image:bald_posing03.jpg|Note how Paula is the fat one at the far left
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| Image:bald_posing04.jpg|[[Fuck you, I'm a dragon!|LOLWUT]]
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| Image:bald_posing05.jpg|Posing with supposed ex-boyfriend "Malakite" aka Anthony Dinardo in 2009
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| Image:bald_posing06.jpg|OMFG LOOK AT ME I'M EMO!!11 so hawt
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| Image:bald_posing07.jpg|[[Weeaboo|azn food iz awesum! ^___^]]
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| Image:bald_posing08.jpg|Paula trying to impose Rainbow Dash Faic whilst wearing a MLP shirt
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| Image:bald_posing09.jpg|[[MAN THE HARPOONS|The Harpoons. Man them.]]
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| Image:IMadeIt.png|[[Sarcasm|But we try so hard. :(]]
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| Image::Link2MyEd.png|How dare he use something I wrote myself against me!
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| </gallery>}}
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| ==Dox==
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| *Full Name: Paula Wilkinson
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| *Age: 21
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| *Currently residing in: Lee High Acres, Lee County, FL (some sort of Apartment complex, she's living there with a bunch of other filthy Furfags)
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| *Born in: Portland, OR
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| *Star Sign: [[Shit nobody cares about|Aquarius]]
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| *Yahoo IM: bare_naked_rattie
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| *AIM: way2sexeh4u
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| *Skye: Balddumborat
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| *Ebay Account: http://myworld.ebay.com/auldan/
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| *Supposed Paypal Email Address which she used for DeviantArt commissions in teh Past: [email protected] | |
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| Note that there are also a shitload of other roleplaying accounts and the like on various other sites, but those aren't lulzy and thus not relevant to Anon's interest as of now.
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| ==See Also==
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| *[[My Little Pony]]
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| *[[Dyke]]
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| *[[Furfag|Furfag]]
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| *[[GOTIS|GOTIS]]
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| *[[Cancer|Cancer]]
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| *[[Weaboo|Weaboo]]
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| *[[Pokemon|Pokemon]]
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| *[[Unwarranted Self Importance|Unwarranted Self Importance]]
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| {{emoseries}}
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| {{whores}}
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| {{furfaggotry}}
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| {{MLP}}
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| [[Category:Guro]]
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