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Mars: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 06:25, 26 January 2014
Equality
Scientists have concluded that all Martians have green skin, but it is debated whether they are capable of being racist or even know about of the concept. That said, careful analysis of recent invasions suggest that Martians may favor negroids over caucasoids, the reason for this is unknown. Amongst themselves, discrimination is possible based on other factors, such as how massive a Martian's cranium is, this is still under investigation.
It has been documented that Martian send more transvestites to the battlefield than females, suggesting that homosexuality is not only tolerated but may even be encouraged. Most females are observed staying at home taking care of babies, a clear indication that Martians are more advanced than Earthling who allow their females to run around and cause problems.
Invasion
For nearly a billion years, the Martians were an environmentally friendly race that could easily put Green Peace to shame. That all changed when an enterprising Martian opened up a small business and soon idea of a free market and capitalism spread, within 75 years all natural resources were depleted. In desperation, the Martians set their sights on Earth, a planet who's indigenous population was technologically inferior. Some debated the morality of an invasion, but the idea of divine destiny prevailed soon thousands of shiny flying saucers were headed to Earth. Unfortunately for the little green men, their success at interplanetary invasions proved worse than France's at winning wars.
Martians spy on Encyclopedia Dramatica
After a decade of bloodshed between Wikipedia and Encyclopedia Dramatica, both sides came to the negotiation table. Jimbo Wales was invited to visit Encyclopedia Dramatica to experience much needed lulz and to browse hipcrime's personal fap vault. Not missing an opportunity to keep the Earthlings at war with each other, J'onzz attempted to assassinate Wikipedia's beloved leader. For this act of savagery, Mr. J'onzz was charged with treason, but during the trial, the more important question became, "Why the fuck are we negotiating with a bunch of Jews from Wikipedia?" While the charges were never officially dropped, the war against Wikipedia resumed, and the trail was forgotten. The dastardly spy still resides within Encyclopedia Dramatica, patiently waiting for his next opportunity to strike.
Gallery
See also
The Sun | Mercury | Venus | Earth | The Moon | Mars | Jupiter | Saturn | Uranus | Neptune | Pluto | Space | Nibiru |