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Hol Tiger: Difference between revisions

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==Hawl Tygar on DevianTART==
==Hawl Tygar on DevianTART==


[[Image:Majula by Hawl Tygar.jpg|thumb|all his art looks like this.]]
[[Image:HolB&.gif|thumb|How do I got ban from forum?]]


Hawl has a crush on a furry artist known as [http://daisythefox.deviantart.com/ Daisy] typically draws inflated furries, which is his sexual fetish. DevianTART is also where he uploads his horrible, horrible art and his shitty comic which appropriately enough features a fatass [[Dragon|dragon]] known as [http://tombfyre.deviantart.com/ Tombfyre], who sadly really 'exists' outside of Hawl's twisted imagination. While he's been active in other parts of the internet, DevianTART is one of the many places that has never banned him for being a retard. The reasons for his lack of banishment is that only a complete dumbass faggot can do so without having their heads explode, as a result only Kulock from the Moogle Cavern has ever been successful. Hol Tiger had an enormously lol-filled fiasco some time ago on the IRC channel #spiritual on furnet. He and some dude named Daemon had a DBZ style text-brawl complete with a discussion that mostly consisted of vowels, hurling insults and claiming their ethereal 'super-powers' would somehow fly through the Interbutts and make the other's brain bleed. Hol Tiger claimed he was an interdimensional winged tiger being who was assassinated by daemons in another realm for being the fastest racer in Fairytopia or something like that. In a very Duke Otterland-esque moment he claims he fell through a void in his death and found himself in the body he is now. Eventually the ops of the channel got sick of both his and Daemons' shit and banned him, thus adding to his list of places where he failed at life.
Hawl has a crush on a furry artist known as [http://daisythefox.deviantart.com/ Daisy] typically draws inflated furries, which is his sexual fetish. DevianTART is also where he uploads his horrible, horrible art and his shitty comic which appropriately enough features a fatass [[Dragon|dragon]] known as [http://tombfyre.deviantart.com/ Tombfyre], who sadly really 'exists' outside of Hawl's twisted imagination. While he's been active in other parts of the internet, DevianTART is one of the many places that has never banned him for being a retard. The reasons for his lack of banishment is that only a complete dumbass faggot can do so without having their heads explode, as a result only Kulock from the Moogle Cavern has ever been successful. Hol Tiger had an enormously lol-filled fiasco some time ago on the IRC channel #spiritual on furnet. He and some dude named Daemon had a DBZ style text-brawl complete with a discussion that mostly consisted of vowels, hurling insults and claiming their ethereal 'super-powers' would somehow fly through the Interbutts and make the other's brain bleed. Hol Tiger claimed he was an interdimensional winged tiger being who was assassinated by daemons in another realm for being the fastest racer in Fairytopia or something like that. In a very Duke Otterland-esque moment he claims he fell through a void in his death and found himself in the body he is now. Eventually the ops of the channel got sick of both his and Daemons' shit and banned him, thus adding to his list of places where he failed at life.

Revision as of 10:50, 24 May 2015

Hol practicing with his Jedi Knight dad (left) and Uncle Tanis (right)

Hawl Tygar formely Hol Tiger (not to be confused with Hal Turner) is an utterly shitty artist on DeviantART who's also a batshit insane otherkin. While batshit insane and otherkin are redundant, it needs to be reiterated because he is just that crazy. In addition to being an otherkin, he thinks he's also inhabited by the spirit of a 'sexy tiger girl' who he sometimes 'transforms' into while talking on the internet. He believes that one day everyone will be transmogrified into a furry somehow and constantly dreams of this day. He will also try his best to copy memes in whatever community he's in, but since he has no knowledge about how they work he tends to just spout them off like a retard whenever possible. He claims he sent the Strong Bad e-mail "virus", just like everyone else on the internet who desperately tries to be cool. He is self-diagnosed with at least 100 mental disorders, upon which he blames his complete lack of social and internet skillz. He is SuperKyle Gf on AIM.

Hawl Tygar on DevianTART

How do I got ban from forum?

Hawl has a crush on a furry artist known as Daisy typically draws inflated furries, which is his sexual fetish. DevianTART is also where he uploads his horrible, horrible art and his shitty comic which appropriately enough features a fatass dragon known as Tombfyre, who sadly really 'exists' outside of Hawl's twisted imagination. While he's been active in other parts of the internet, DevianTART is one of the many places that has never banned him for being a retard. The reasons for his lack of banishment is that only a complete dumbass faggot can do so without having their heads explode, as a result only Kulock from the Moogle Cavern has ever been successful. Hol Tiger had an enormously lol-filled fiasco some time ago on the IRC channel #spiritual on furnet. He and some dude named Daemon had a DBZ style text-brawl complete with a discussion that mostly consisted of vowels, hurling insults and claiming their ethereal 'super-powers' would somehow fly through the Interbutts and make the other's brain bleed. Hol Tiger claimed he was an interdimensional winged tiger being who was assassinated by daemons in another realm for being the fastest racer in Fairytopia or something like that. In a very Duke Otterland-esque moment he claims he fell through a void in his death and found himself in the body he is now. Eventually the ops of the channel got sick of both his and Daemons' shit and banned him, thus adding to his list of places where he failed at life.

Last Thursday, he changed his user name to "Hawl-Tygar" and started going nuts for Blue-Leader. He attempted to draw in Blue-Leader's "style," and the result was something far worse than Blue-Leader himself could cough up.

He now claims that he will one day be the king of the universe and is a self-proclaimed "God of Lust, Pride, and Fury," as well as a "gay butt ninja," and Rouge The Bat is his wife, whether he realizes that she doesn't exist or if he's just claiming this, for the lulz.

How do I got ban?

Hol Tiger was a member of The Moogle Cavern forums, where he was known for being a self-absorbed ass who wouldn't acknowledge the reasons why anyone thought he was so full of fail. He went through "phases" where he started acting in different ways, such as that phase he went through where he talked like Yoda for no reason in some posts [1]. He was only there because he knew some shitty unfunny Newgrounds animator who was friends with one of the mods there.

Despite the fact that he was an idiot asshole who essentially went "LA LA LA LA I CAN'T HEAR YOU" whenever anyone told him how he could improve himself, the administrator Kulock refused to ban him for some reason. He probably yiffed him or something to keep himself on the forums. After two years more than he should've even been unbanned there, he finally got the banhammer dropped on him due to his own stupidity and gullibility. More or less a final straw, what got the retard banned was him being asked to deliver a message from the 'admin' that basically said "Stop fucking with Hol or I'll get the internet police on your ass.". However, this message was actually from someone who was posing as the admin, Kulock, with the convincing new screen name of Cornelius Fatcox. Despite it being quite clear that this was not Kulock, Hol posted the message anyway, and was soon excommunicated from the Cavern with the historic final words "Automatic ban. I never said any such thing."

He was gone after he explained why he did, FOR THE LULZ, everyone applauded and let him back in under the name Shave, sadly they all started hating him after he changed his name back to Hawl, because of how short their attention spans are.

Hol Tiger on GameFAGs

Hol Tiger can also be found on the Super Smash Bros. Brawl boards at GameFAQs, and all of his posts will be hilariously lulzy. Usually involving:

  • Making predictions for updates and claiming he has "inside info". He seriously claims that there is a cutscene where Solid Snake kills Mr. Game and Watch.
  • Claims Sakurai is unoriginal and knows nothing about video games except for Mario and Kirby because "Master Hand was in Kirby games as the hand that you used to point at 'Continue' and 'Quit'". SAKURAAAAIIIII
  • Makes Phoenix Wright roleplaying topics to prove that Ridley can't be playable.
  • Makes up shitty rumors about the character list, then when people call him on his bullshit, he tells everyone to blame that Serebii.net guy.
  • Fails to see the difference between Mewtwo and Lucario

Magick and Project Valmanway

Finally losing his mind, Hol started practicing chaos magick, claiming to have been turned into an incubus by Rouge the Bat. He thinks he can eventually take over the world and turn everyone into furries. He named his imaginary army "Project Valmanway" after a shitty game no one cares about. He's also teamed up with his tiger girl alter ego, who is a separate person now and also invisible.

Tips for effective lol-milking

Hol happens to make one of the best lolcows around. Just pop open your favorite AIM client, send him an IM at "superkyle gf" and let the lulz flow. To maximize your enjoyment, follow these protips:

  1. Upon first IMing him, refrain from alluding to your identity in anyway. After a while he'll take a random-ass stab in the dark and assume you're from one of the various factions that hates him, and he'll insist that his guess is correct, resulting in much lols and irony.
  2. Gently pull the conversation towards the topic of otherkins and furries. Subtlety is key: make it seem like he brought it up if at all possible.
  3. Once the topic has turned solidly to furries or otherkin, directly ask if furries and otherkins are the same thing. He will instantly give you a lulz-packed monologue about why otherkins and furries are soooooooo different.
  4. If things start to slow down, make a fake AIM account by picking three of the following at random: Daisy, Teh, Cute, Random, Fox, Bungmanship, Lobster, or Nigga. For bonus points, make the first and last words all lowercase and the middle word all upper case, and use no spaces (ex. tehRANDOMbungmanship). Then, IM him with your new sockpuppet and pretend to be his black girlfriend, Daisy. Make no attempts to imitate a specific typing style, but vehemently deny that you are whoever he claims you are.
  5. If things get slow again, introduce ten or so of your closest friends to this article and tell them to IM him in concert.
  6. Ask him if he is interested in a discount brick.
  7. When you're tired or it looks like he's getting ready to block you, send him a link to this article or the otherkin page and ask him to verify it. A++++.
  8. Challenge him in Brawl, he'll whine worse than your mom after a good anal blazing
  9. Message him claiming to be a mage out to stop Project Valmanway.

Remember, it takes a veritable shitload of asshatery to get him to block you, so if you do, congratulations, you're a first rate troll. Expect him to unblock you in a day or two so the lulz can begin anew. Also expect him to IM you out of the blue one day asking you to help him operate a cheat code in an obscure Japanese import-only videogame. It happens.

Some things that spark his interest are "light sabres", Mortal Kombat, spelling things with a k because of how much he likes Mortal Kombat, and references to webcartoons that aren't funny. (Which means about all of them.)

Hol Tiger: Exiled Moogle

Hol Tiger wrote a shitty comic script. Then one of the guys who used to troll Chris chan by drawing simonchu, helping write asperchu and running asperpedia, drew it (currently calls himself "nerdbot").

Original shit

tard quotes

   
 
At the age of 11 I first met my spiritual guardian Rouge. She posed as the actual Rouge the Bat, and told me about feminism. She helped me develop an image of what a "perfect me" would be like. The Sexy Tiger Girl! Because of this I've wanted to be a girl for as long as you guys have known me... I got better.

Meeting Rouge also helped me shake my christain beliefs, and is the first time I ever "made love". Well technically... when I sleep I have incredibly lucid dreams or no dreams at all, but when I wake up I have an intense erection and sleep paralysis. She is a succubus so she feeds off me to live, but I like her so I allow it, I just pace myself so she doesn't kill me.
 


 
 

—Hol

   
 
As for someone I want to spend my life with I already have one of those (rouge). Sadly she is an astral and although we have had sex, it doesn't count, she's not physical.

PS: Succubi are capable of a sense of eurphoria far greater than your comprehension.
 


 
 

—Hol lost his virginity to an imaginary friend

   
 
Werewolves DON'T REALLY CHANGE SHAPE, zis applies for all other were-species, ve also have no problem with ze silver, ve merely have ze instincts of vhatever ve are, and increased athletic ability in ze vield vat ve are, in my case I have increased agility and speed, aswell as the ability to purr, my taste buds were altered on the day of my awakening to find two things I previously hated to be a quite bit more favorable to me, milk and fish are like Coke and steak to me now

-Vampires don't have any problem with the sun and do not suck blood, they drink it but only the sangurians do zat, Miranda was a sexual vampress, she fed of off ze sexual energies of others (mainly why she liked me grabbing her rump so much)
 


 
 

— Hol is a werewolf,and his ex is a vampire

Hol Tiger on the Internets

Hol Tiger is part of a series on

Furfaggotry

Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage.

Hol Tiger is part of a series on

DeviantART

Visit the DeviantART Portal for complete coverage.