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| [[File:Super_looz.jpg|thumb|Typical /b/tard, also the one who wrote the text below is a newfag himself.]]
| | #REDIRECT [[B/tard]] |
| If you want to lose all moral value and sanity, feel free to frequent /[[b]]/. It's primarily populated by [[pedophilia|pedophiles]], [[Furry|furries]], [[otaku]], [[wapanese]], [[Azn]]s, WoWfags, [[otherkin]], [[Trent Reznor]], probably [[Will Smith]], and more recently, [[gentlemen]]. Also, [[God]] has been known to lurk /b/ for hopes of landing some hawt [[Baby Fuck]]. All these fags are called <b>/b/tards</b>. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy in [[series of tubes|all the tubes]]. According to [[Faux News]], the inhabitants of [[4chan]]'s /[[b]]/ are also {{youtube|DNO6G4ApJQY|a secret underground network}} of [[HACKERS ON STEROIDS]].
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| Everyone who was finally [[permabanned]] from [[Something Awful]], found [[Ogrish.com|Ogrish]] too tame, or wants to latch on to the webwhore in-crowd, call /b/ home. Illnesses and sexual deviations like retardism and coprophilia have been [[lie|scientifically proven]] to be symptoms of frequenting /b/.
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| /b/tards are also known for planning attacks on others using the [[interbutts]], such as [[Scientologist]]s, [[Australia]], and more recently, [[Operation Blue Crayon]] (a /b/-based attack planned against [[Justin Bieber]] and [[facebook]]).
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| <br/><br/>
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| [[File:Btard.jpg|center]]
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| <br/><br/>
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| ==How has /b/ changed your life?==
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| [[Image:4chan_b_motivation.jpg|thumb|/b/ will [[fuck|rape you]].]]
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| [[Image:Poster1068921.jpg|thumb|/b/ summarized.]]
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| *We learned that you shouldn't be too serious about your [[copypasta]]. Especially when it comes to [[football]].
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| *If you frequent [[Habbo Hotel]], then you'll notice that creating a character with a suit and an Afro is now grounds for an insta-[[ban]]. You have /b/ to thank for that.
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| */b/tards were called in to troll [[Wowzaz_86]]'s LiveJournal after he [[almost_raped|munched carpet on a sleeping girl]].
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| *<nowiki>#4chan</nowiki> is populated almost exclusively by /b/tards. Everyone else is [[moot|Doug]].
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| *If you've become [[gay]], a [[furry]], or a run-of-the-mill [[sick fuck]] due to [[internets]] exposure, it is likely caused by a combination of [[LiveJournal]] and /b/.
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| *Citing /b/ can help you instantly [[pwn]] any [[anarchy|anarchist]] for what a society without rules will be like.
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| *[[Almostanhero|Despite what they tell you, /b/tards will not selfpwn.]]
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| *If you have AIDS, [[Jews did WTC|/b/ did it.]]
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| *You will be [[Dying Alone]].
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| *You think of everyone as black person and [[gay|faggots]].
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| [[Image:daysonb.jpg|thumb|right|The effects of /b/ on the brain.]]
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| ==Sample [[tl;dr]] Quotes from /b/==
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| [[Image:Typicalbtard.jpg|thumb|Typical /b/ user. Tits are fake because [[No girls on the internet|there are no girls on the Internets]].]]
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| [[Image:This_is_b.jpeg|thumb|The [[Random Page|essence]] of [[b/|/b/]].]]
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| [[Image:Typical thread.JPG|thumb|The essence of /b/.]]
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| [[Image:Example_%26_4Chan_-_B.jpg|thumb|WARNING: /b/ may contain /d/ickgirls!]]
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| [[File:TypicalBTard.png|thumb|Typical /b/tard.]]
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| [[Image:hidingCP.jpg|thumb|Need to hide your CP? 4chan sure can help!]]
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| [[Image:Veteran_btard.jpg|thumb|Veteran /b/tard [[4chan ergonomics|at his computer]].]]
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| [[Image:typicalnewfags.jpg|thumb|Typical [[newfags]] who fail at <s>/b/</s> life.]]
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| [[Image:bbottle.JPG|thumb|Sometimes, /b/ comes in bottles.]]
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| [[Image:Story of b.jpg|thumb|Other times, /b/ comes in books.]]
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| [[Image:Sanity.jpg|thumb|This says all that is good of /b/.]]
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| [[Image:AWHITEMANLOVESMELON.jpg|thumb|Like this?]]
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| [[Image:Btard.gif|thumb|How /b/tards are born.]]
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| {{quote|hey faggots from wiki...this isn't a family-friendly site. you'll probably see lots of nigger dicks, girls with [[Anal|electronic gadgets in their asses]], [[CP|who look 13]], racism, sexism, retards, faggots, heads split open, dead cats, and TONS of shit you won't understand.
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| pic related. it's a nigger dick.
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| oh and here's a video of a guy being murdered with a hammer...''|Anonymous}}
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| {{quote|''This is fucking disturbing...all these pictures of children...but for some strange reason I got a boner while looking through those pics.''|Anonymous}}
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| {{quote|''/b/ is quite unusual. The people on /b/ collect and distribute child pornography. /b/ is desensitized to any violence or sexuality. Not a day goes by on /b/ without someone being told to kill themselves. If you harm a cat and /b/ finds out about it, though, your life is about to be over.''|Anonymous}}
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| {{squote|''"hey guy's i think after 23 years I've finally realized i am gay or maybe partially i dunno. this is scary but in a way liberating. I woke up one day after having a dream about an orgy with men. It bothered me for the last week every time i would think about it i got horny. I started looking at craigslist listings for a sexual experience, well tonight a guy came over, we made out first, i was never hornier in my life. He unzipped my pants and flipped me over on the sofa and started licking my anus, that got me so hard. He then started jerking me off while shoving his tongue down my anus. I've never came so fast, i felt so embarrassed but he was very reassuring, he licked me clean. I was so afraid that after i came i would regret what i have done, but i didn't, i was just a little more relaxed, the lust for the cock was still there, i just wasn't as nervous now. Anyway i didn't want to blow him because i told him i was afraid of the aids, so he put on a condom and began to fuck me from behind. I've had anal experiences before, my girlfriend (she's back home for summer break, we go to school together, more about her later) used a strap on on me a number of times and when I'm alone at home sometimes lurking /b/ I'd have a butt plug in me. But wow, this is a whole different experience, i was being fucked by man who knew what he was doing, anal with my girlfriend was pleasurable but compared to this guy her thrusts were awkward and without the control that a person growing up with a {{wordfilter|text=PENIS}} all his life.''|Anonymous}}
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| {{quote|''so, i see you've taken a small, 4-5 year old retard kid, and shopped jizzing {{wordfilter|text=PENIS}}es around his smiling face so it looks like a manga bukkake party. God bless you anonymous. That could only happen here on /b/''|Anonymous}}
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| {{squote|''I just ate some fried chicken.
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| ''The breasts were juicy, and the buns were soft and warm.
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| ''Afterwords, the division manager of Popeye's came up to my table and asked me how the meal was. I said I was satisfied, but the meal lacked a certain je ne sais quoi. He apologized profusely, and said he had something to show me that would make up for it.
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| ''He lead me to the back of the Popeye's, to a room soaked from floor to ceiling in blood. In the center of it was a live horse, chained by all four legs to the structural supports of the warehouse like room. As I watched, employees of the Popeye's cut large sections from the horse, which was whinnying and screaming in horror. The Popeye's employees took the chunks of horseflesh and sliced them into pieces, then they rooted around through the bags of trash strewn around the room to find discarded chicken bones. They quickly tenderized the meat with sledgehammers and fed it into a machine which formed the horsemeat around the bones, then they breaded and deepfried it.
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| ''I asked the division manager why he had led me back to this place, and he pointed at the steed's rump, the asshole puckering rhythmically with terror. "We're just about to use that section, would you like a crack at it first?"
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| ''I quickly unzipped my pants and wasted no time jamming my erect {{wordfilter|text=PENIS}} into the stallion's defenseless asshole. I came just as the horse died. I was delighted. Popeye's definitely went the extra mile to make me a satisfied customer.|Anonymous}}
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| {{squote|'''Wow, I was a patron of /b/ for many months before I found the wonders of SA. To me /b/ has been like an abusive but loving internet father/little sister. When I finally managed to wrap my mind around what /b/ has done I felt many a shiver run down my spine. /b/ is a tainted and twisted primeval force that strikes with torrent of filth so brutal and terrible that nothing can escape its grasp unharmed. This man has lost his career and support from his fellow racists due to an angry and violent hive mind who's only purpose is to corrupt and infuriate outsiders. While I don't support either side because they both have done some fucked up shit, I stand in fear and awe at the power /b/ wields. I have always stood in awe at colossal forces. A tidal wave, a hurricane, a nuclear explosion, all destroy totally and nothing else because that is what they do. Like the fires of hell that brutally lash forth to ravish what we hold dear, this dramatic impact on the real world has left me shaken. What my mind keeps looping back to is the fact that /b/ has destroyed a public icon. A man who was living his dream and passionately pursuing it day by day was laid low because part of the internet felt like it. He wasn't taken down by use of traditional protest or a nonprofit organization that wanted publicity, but the manic hatred of Anonymous. /b/ is the raw heart of the internet, and it has claimed a victim. I can only stand in awe as /b/ laughs with glee at its blood smeared palms, not even fully comprehending the size of what it has wrought upon the world. HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS.'''|Anonymous}}
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| {{squote|''I just spent the last twenty minutes rubbing a twelve year old girl's bare chest.
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| ''"How?" you ask. Well apparently there are a select few contexts within which such an action is acceptable. For instance, if your niece has a hacking cough and your sister asks you to "put some of this on her" while she calls the doctor.''
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| ''"Putting some of this on her" meant using my bare hands to rub this vapor ointment shit all over her BARE NAKED CHEST. My heartbeat is still all erratic from it. I had a boner the size of Manhattan the entire time. She's sleeping now and I guess she feels better because she stopped coughing.''
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| ''Details: She's about 5 feet tall, has long brown hair, a cute face, a thin waist and long skinny legs. She's in jammies I think because although I'm pretty shaken up right now I know I unbuttoned something before I went at it.''
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| ''God I feel so great. I just rubbed my hands all over her FUCKING TITS, you guys. Well the puffy parts of her chest anyway. Her nipples got hard. I just about wept tears of joy.''
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| ''I didn't do anything else because I'm a coward and rubbing was enough. Plus it was legal and I didn't technically do anything wrong, so I'm in the clear.''
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| ''I'd write more but I seriously have to go fap while the memory is fresh in my head.''|Anonymous}}
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| ==Related==
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| *[[Anonymous]]
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| */[[b]]/
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| *[[*chan]]
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| {{chans}}
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| <br/>{{Stub}}
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