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Internal Applause: Difference between revisions
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A quiet [[masturbation|self-congratulations]] for some, the most powerful way to say, "I love you," for others. Internal applause is the biggest thing in [[sex|sexual expression]] right now. When you are having fantastic sex with your lover, and you are overcome with the urge to scream, "Fuck yes this is awesome," instead, turn them around, shove both of your fists lovingly into the orifice of your choice, and applaud. Applaud the fuck out of their insides. <3 | A quiet [[masturbation|self-congratulations]] for some, the most powerful way to say, "I love you," for others. Internal applause is the biggest thing in [[sex|sexual expression]] right now. When you are having fantastic sex with your lover, and you are overcome with the urge to scream, "Fuck yes this is awesome," instead, turn them around, shove both of your fists lovingly into the orifice of your choice, and applaud. Applaud the fuck out of their insides. <3 | ||
Latest revision as of 12:15, 28 August 2015
A quiet self-congratulations for some, the most powerful way to say, "I love you," for others. Internal applause is the biggest thing in sexual expression right now. When you are having fantastic sex with your lover, and you are overcome with the urge to scream, "Fuck yes this is awesome," instead, turn them around, shove both of your fists lovingly into the orifice of your choice, and applaud. Applaud the fuck out of their insides. <3
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Local Varieties
While the man would have you believe that you can only perform internal applause in the privacy of your own home and in the rectum of your lover, we have it on firm ground that you can, in fact, internally applaud complete strangers, at any time, in any place. This is a common practice in cybersexual encounters. For example:
Prima: Oh my god you are so hot I love you harder yes oh god.
Secunda: If you really loved me, you'd applaud my efforts.
Prima: *Applauds*
Secunda: ...Internally.
Prima: ...
Secunda: ... D:
Prima: *Lovingly inserts his/her fists into Secunda's love canal of choice*
Secunda: I love you.
While normally the applause is all done in one cavity, if you happen to be praising a woman or a corpse, you have the option of applauding through the wall dividing two orifices, doubling the celebration.
Internal Handjob
An alternative to internal applause is an internal handjob, wherein one will insert a large cock into an orifice before sending a clapping apparatus in after it to finish the job. Typical responses to internal handjobs include "A++" and "Top seller, will fuck again." Zen masters have reported this as the height of sexual pleasure.
It is generally understood that to get any sort of meaningful praise on DeviantART you must forcefully grab the cock of one of the higher ups and shove it into your gaping whore of a vagina, then give the best damn internal handjob of that higher up's life. Any tartlet can achieve the greatest levels of artistic integrity with this proven method.
Gallery of <3
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He reaches in, and... -
Whoa! That's amazing! -
High five! -
Now you're thinking with portals! -
When is it too much? When could loving someone ever be too much? -
Internal pat-a-cake is the greatest praise a whore can receive. -
Well this seems all in order... -
OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO YOU -
You are doing it wrong.
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Internal Applause is part of a series on Visit the Sex Portal for complete coverage. |