Clitoris

Proper stimulation of the clitoris.

Artist's rendition of what the clitoris might look like.

Not to be confused with Pokémon

The clitoris is the most sensitive part of the human body, containing 8,000 times more nerve endings than the male Penis. In developmental biology this developed from a woman's equivalent to a cock, but because as women are of course inferior to men, theirs are smaller and infinitely more sensitive, but when stimulated it can drive a girl to the state of near-insanity and absolute euphoria. A never-ending cycle that is sex

	“	The world is divided into three categories of men: those who know where the clitoris is, those who don’t, and those who are still looking. Most men worldwide fall into the last two categories.	„
	— the first category represents men who are batshit crazy. Everyone else is mostly sane.

Like Bigfoot, there are a lot of fake pictures on the internets showing the clitoris. These pictures are usually blurry or, in the case of video, too shaky to make out any detail. Most anatomical pictures show something labeled as a clitoris. This is done purely for the lulz, as every REAL gynecologist knows that there is no such thing. Anyone who tries to tell you where the clitoris resides is probably an e-doctor. Any bumps around the cunt are definitely a sign of herpesyphigonohepachlamitaids, and one should proceed to panic. 10% of all people who manage to remove the bump are cured, however the remaining 393% die instantly.

Legends Surrounding the Clitoris

Like most mythical beings, the clitoris is said to have magical powers.

The "Female Cock" Myth

The clitoris has been used as a rallying cry for feminists. They believe that the clitoris is the female version of the cock. This idea is of course absurd as they only believe such ridiculous nonsense to try and prove they are equal to men - even if the clitoris did exist, its minute size, high sensitivity and extreme fragility shows that god made all women inferior to males.

Scientists who have been trying to study this elusive entity have concluded that the clitoris has no purpose other than to give pleasure to the female. This makes the fact that some men enjoy snipping them off all the more lulzy.

Female Ejaculation

If discovered and successfully stimulated, the clitoris may make the female's head spin around.

Because women don't produce semen (including you Thomas Beatie) just what exactly they are ejaculating is a mystery. She's probably just pissed on you. If a so-called female ejaculates on you, chances are she's a trap, transvestite or transexual (maybe Chyna). If you only notice this after s/he has experienced orgasm, chances are you are either blind or a sick fuck who enjoys these abominations of nature.

As you can tell, when women pay too much attention to the clitoris it can grow to unbelievable proportions, thus evolving them into dickgirls. This only goes to prove that raging feminazis and lesbians secretly yearn to become men. Luckily there is a solution to this problem.

Female Circumcision

Moar info: Circumcision#Female circumcision.

What to do when you spot the clitoris.

Circumcised Vaginas are also smooth as fuck!

Some cultures circumcise women to get rid of the clitoris's natural habitat, usually out of fear. Strangely enough most of these acts are preformed in Africa. The reason for this is simple - in order to keep up the myth of large negro cocks they must eliminate the competition, and that includes clits barely half an inch long.

Some argue that if this is true, why don't chinks and japs (well-known for their incredibly small penii) do the same? This answer to this is that the Japanese are also well-known for their sexual perversions. Believing in such strange things as the clitoris probably turns them on.

Fun Facts

• The Spanish name for the Clitoris is El Chupacabra, or goat sucker. Legend has it that a clitoris once sucked the blood out of a goat, or whatever.
• Because the female spotted hyena's clitoris is 90% the size of the male spotted hyena's penis, their clitoris is called a "pseudo-penis", and they urinate, mate, and giving birth through it. Giving birth through this enlarged erectile clitoris is really like giving birth through your penis:

“	Her clitoris, which contains the birthing canal, protrudes 7 inches from her body. [...] "It's really weird genitalia, but it seems to work. Although giving birth through a 'penis' isn't a trivial problem." The clitoris' birth canal is only an inch in diameter, and the tissue often tears as a 2-pound cub squeezes through the narrow opening. The rip can be fatal, as evidenced by the high death rate for first-time mothers	„
—"The Painful Realities of Hyena Sex" at livescience.com

The female spotted hyena also has a "pseudo-scrotum".[1] Female spotted hyenas have ballsacks; they are fucking weird.

Gallery

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  Your mom's clitoris
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  Beware a clit on the property bladder
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  Doctors have found the clitoris is more often located deep within the throat.
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  A clit collector

External Links

• www.the-clitoris.com ("Congrats! You've Finally Found It!")
• How to find the clitoris

See Also

• Cock - VERY self-evident
• Cunt
• Ejaculate
• Female Circumcision
• Feminism

Clitoris is part of a series on Sex Visit the Sex Portal for complete coverage.