Created page with "{{AOTN|Luka Magnotta|LUKA MAGNOTTA 0-with-exif.jpg| '''Luka Rocco Magnotta''', born '''Eric Clinton Kirk Newman''', is a former Toronto area hooker, kitten..."
'''Luka Rocco Magnotta''', born '''Eric [[Hillary Clinton|Clinton]] Kirk Newman''', is a former Toronto area hooker, kitten torturer, and snuff film set designer, whose dream of becoming a porn star was shattered when he found that nobody cared to view his pencil-dick. After failing to become a pornstar, he turned to prostitution to make a living. By age 27 Magnotta had aged out of twink status, and no longer appealed to [[old people|his target demographic]], so he decided to make a name for himself by uploading videos of himself torturing cats, and using their corpses as sex toys.
For as long as there have been [[Christian]]s, there have been those who [[YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG|kinda went the completely opposite direction]], and worshiped [[Satan]], as opposed to [[God]] - someone always has to root for the losing team. These [[Fag|rebels]] have come to be known as '''Satanists'''. Just like Christians, they're overly defensive about their beliefs, and ''will'' bitch about you on their [[LiveJournal|LiveJournals]], should you ever cross them. Note: the vast majority of Satanists don't even worship the devil; they're basically just egotistical atheists that set out to worship themselves as "gods". Even the guy with the hairiest slab of fat below his chin doesn't have as classy a fedora that most Satanists possess.
Being the exact definition of an IRL [[internet tough guy]], on December 21, 2010,<s>[http://www.ottawacitizen.com/news/Internet/6711382/story.html]</s>{{archive|GFeAt}} Fagnotta took two kittens, put them in a vacuum bag, and slowly suffocated them while playing John Lennon's ''Happy Christmas (War Is Over)''. Later, pix surfaced that appeared to show Magnotta using the tongues of the dead kittens to stimulate his penis. Then in 2011 he [[vore|fed another one alive to his pet python]] while playing ''Little Drummer Boy''. Later in 2011, he taped a cat to a stick and drowned it in a bath tub.
In an attempt to prove they are real [[atheists|freethinkers]] while still relying on the righteous justice known as [[religion]], people have dismissed Satan's story as being a damned [[lie]] and [[fanfiction|replaced it with their own]], stating that Satan was, in fact, a [[retard|great mind]] who was cast out of heaven for daring to question [[God]], thus making him [[unwarranted self-importance|a martyr among the sheep known as the Lord's angels.]]
On May 25, 2012, a video called [http://encyclopediadramatica.rs/flowplayer/vid/lukaroccomagnotta/1-lunatic-1-ice-pick.flv 1 Lunatic 1 Ice Pick] surfaced which depicts the dismemberment of Lin Jun, a 33 year old student at Concordia University, who was reported missing on May 24, 2012. [http://www.bestgore.com/murder/luka-magnotta-perpetrator-behind-1-lunatic-1-ice-pick/ E-detectives recognized] Magnotta as the person in the video. Fagnotta was arrested in Berlin and extradited to Canada where he was charged with first-degree murder, making threats to members of Parliament, and interfering with the dignity of a dead body. However, Fagnotta [[necrophilia|has feelings for dead bodies]]; to the point where he blogs about taking an embalmed corpse home ([[:File:Luka-magnotta-necroblog-2.png|screencap of deleted blog]]), watching a DVD together and going out for a picnic before taking the corpse to bed with him for some McLovin. Therefore Luka plans to treat a corpse with extreme [[Gay|TLC]] before taking its dignity away from it again.
On December 23, 2014, Magnotta was found guilty of first degree murder, and sentenced to 25 years without parole. His accomplice remains at large.
|GAY PORN STAR GONE WILD|SCP Foundation|Garfield|Halloween (franchise)}}
For as long as there have been Christians, there have been those who kinda went the completely opposite direction, and worshiped Satan, as opposed to God - someone always has to root for the losing team. These rebels have come to be known as Satanists. Just like Christians, they're overly defensive about their beliefs, and will bitch about you on their LiveJournals, should you ever cross them. Note: the vast majority of Satanists don't even worship the devil; they're basically just egotistical atheists that set out to worship themselves as "gods". Even the guy with the hairiest slab of fat below his chin doesn't have as classy a fedora that most Satanists possess.
