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| ==Howard Unruh==
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| '''[[Powerword|Howard Barton Unruh]]''' (January 21, [[Old|1921]] – October 19, [[Lolwut|2009]]), was a [[Faggot|deeply closeted]] [[Oldfag|World War II veteran]], and the [[Epic Win|first mass shooter in Amerimutt history]]. He managed [[Win|13 kills and 3 injuries]] with a [[Gun|Lüger]] in only [[GOTTA GO FAST|twelve minutes]]! While not as impressive as [[Adam Lanza|other]] [[Cho Seung-hui|mass]] [[Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold|shooters]], he laid out the groundwork for future [[You|edgy faggots who want to take out their frustration on other people]].
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| His [[At least 100 years|1949]] [[New Jersey]] chimpout was the deadliest shooting for 17 YEARS, until [[Charles Whitman's Tumor|Charlie Whitman]] stepped up and managed [[Holy shit|17 kills and 31 injuries]] in [[Texas]], on [[Last thursday|1966]].
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| ==Howie's Early Life==
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| Howie was born to [[Your dad|Sam Unruh]] and [[Your mom|Freda]] [[Balls|Vollmer]]. He also had a [[13-year-old boy|younger brother named James]].
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Latest revision as of 08:57, 13 July 2022
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