Registration has been disabled and the moderation extension has been turned off.
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.

Brett Keane: Difference between revisions

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigation Jump to search
imported>KingNippleFish666
imported>KingNippleFish666
 
(17 intermediate revisions by the same user not shown)
Line 390: Line 390:
If you have the time, feel free to file a report against his YouTube channel and see for yourself. He is being protected by YouTube, he will never be banned.
If you have the time, feel free to file a report against his YouTube channel and see for yourself. He is being protected by YouTube, he will never be banned.


===Brett Keane vs. The Drunken Peasants===
==Brett Keane vs. The Drunken Peasants==


From 2014 to now, Brett Keane's videos were and still are featured on The Drunken Peasants Podcast countless times where he's been exposed for being a massive fucking retard and LOLcow. The best of the saga was from 2014-2017. This saga has revived what meager relevance Brett had to begin with and produced some of the best YouTube gold ornline.
From 2014 to now, Brett Keane's videos were and still are featured on The Drunken Peasants Podcast countless times where he's been exposed for being a massive fucking retard and LOLcow. The best of the saga was from 2014-2017. This saga has revived what meager relevance Brett had to begin with and produced some of the best YouTube gold ornline.
Line 404: Line 404:




'''EPISODE 166:''' The catalyst for the Great Drama War of 2016. Brett would come on solo and get brutally buttfucked by DP. DP'd by DP but 4 vs. 1 instead with TJ, Paul, Scotty and Ben all taking turns refuting Brett Keane and ripping the retarded manatee a new, stanky asshole. It was a beatdown situation. The Peasants covered Brett's e-begging, chronic lying, attention whoring, plagiarizing, idiotic actions, framing [[FakeSagan]] by calling his kids waterheads and totally destroyed Brett on the whole "like father, like son" mindset. Brett cowardly went after TJ's father (who was dead and unable to defend himself) for scamming people. His argument was that because TJ's father was a scammer, so was TJ. The Peasants once again destroyed the fat retard. It was this episode that "French Vanilla situation" emerged. For those of you who are unaware, this was Brett's code for bathroom break. Anyone who was not a complete retard knew that Brett was actually crying like a little bitch to Dorn. Now DP viewers knew that Brett was not only retarded and a landlocked manatee but was also profoundly scummy and a massive pussy. Terrible combo. The drama war would kick off very quickly after. The gloves were off now in the situation. After this point, anytime the Peasants covered Brett it was less about an intellectual exchange of ideas and more about fighting with Brett and ripping him a new one and milking him for the LOLcow that he was, is and always will be. The Peasants saw the manatee as content and milked the fuck out of him.
'''EPISODE 166:''' The catalyst for the Great Drama War of 2016. Brett would come on solo and get brutally buttfucked by DP. DP'd by DP but 4 vs. 1 instead with TJ, Paul, Scotty and Ben all taking turns refuting Brett Keane and ripping the retarded manatee a new, stanky asshole. It was a beatdown situation. The Peasants covered Brett's e-begging, chronic lying, attention whoring, plagiarizing, idiotic actions, framing [[FakeSagan]] by calling his kids waterheads and totally destroyed Brett on the whole "like father, like son" mindset. Brett cowardly went after TJ's father (who was dead and unable to defend himself) for scamming people. His argument was that because TJ's father was a scammer, so was TJ. The Peasants once again destroyed the fat retard. It was this episode that "French Vanilla situation" emerged. For those of you who are unaware, this was Brett's code for bathroom break and it conveniently came up every time the Peasants brought up a good point against him. Anyone who was not a complete retard knew that Brett was actually crying like a little bitch to Dorn. Now DP viewers knew that Brett was not only retarded and a landlocked manatee but was also profoundly scummy and a massive pussy. Terrible combo. The drama war would kick off very quickly after. The gloves were off now in the situation. After this point, anytime the Peasants covered Brett it was less about an intellectual exchange of ideas and more about fighting with Brett and ripping him a new one and milking him for the LOLcow that he was, is and always will be. The Peasants saw the manatee as content and milked the fuck out of him.


'''EPISODE 219:''' On the post show, TJ declared that he was done with Brett and that Brett was officially on his shitlist. TJ went off on a tirade about how Brett was a piece of shit for false-flagging and false DMCAing.
'''EPISODE 219:''' On the post show, TJ declared that he was done with Brett and that Brett was officially on his shitlist. TJ went off on a tirade about how Brett was a piece of shit for false-flagging and false DMCAing.
Line 415: Line 415:


'''EPISODE 236:''' The Manatee is paid $1000 for showing his gums and toothless mouth. Gormjorb giver confirmed.
'''EPISODE 236:''' The Manatee is paid $1000 for showing his gums and toothless mouth. Gormjorb giver confirmed.
'''EPISODE 240:''' Brett challenges 30 atheists to a fight. BIG LOL. The Peasants covered it with Jaclyn Glenn as a guest and thoroughly dismantled him, again.


'''EPISODE 260:''' The Peasants spend an hour going onto Brett's GamesULove channel and heckling him as he fucked up the game and acted like a meandering retard. "Give me a gumjob Brett" was the main heckle.
'''EPISODE 260:''' The Peasants spend an hour going onto Brett's GamesULove channel and heckling him as he fucked up the game and acted like a meandering retard. "Give me a gumjob Brett" was the main heckle.
Line 571: Line 573:
*'''[[The Drunken Peasants]]''' - A podcast that has spent COUNTLESS hours punking Brett's bitch ass and exposing him for the fat, sociopathic, mouth-breathing retard that he is.
*'''[[The Drunken Peasants]]''' - A podcast that has spent COUNTLESS hours punking Brett's bitch ass and exposing him for the fat, sociopathic, mouth-breathing retard that he is.
*'''[[CultOfDusty]]''' - Edgy motherfucker that stirs the drama pot and starts controversy on the internet. Fucks hot bitches and is the bane of Pauly Morus' existence.
*'''[[CultOfDusty]]''' - Edgy motherfucker that stirs the drama pot and starts controversy on the internet. Fucks hot bitches and is the bane of Pauly Morus' existence.
*'''[[Coughlan666]]''' - Another one of the OGs of YouTube atheism in the 2006-2007 era of YouTube atheism. Has since turned into a whiny feminist [[your dad|faggot]]. One of Brett's mass false flagging victims.  
*'''[[Coughlan666]]''' - Another one of the OGs of YouTube atheism in the 2006-2007 era of YouTube atheism. Has since turned into a whiny feminist [[your dad|faggot]]. One of Brett's mass false flagging victims. Brett of course denied this, only to admit it later on like the weasly rotund scumfuck that he is.
*'''[[HappyCabbie]]''' - His best friend who has died.  
*'''[[HappyCabbie]]''' - His best friend who has died.  
*'''[[Devon Tracey]]''' - Bald wannabe alpha male. Brett kissed his ass only to be cucked and rejected by Devon. Amazing. Brett minor detractor.
*'''[[Devon Tracey]]''' - Bald wannabe alpha male. Brett kissed his ass only to be cucked and rejected by Devon. Amazing. Brett minor detractor.
Line 580: Line 582:
*'''[[TommyFromTheBronx]]''' - Actual tough guy and all-around badass. Tried really hard to be Brett's friend. Brett's too much of a scumfuck to keep friends.  
*'''[[TommyFromTheBronx]]''' - Actual tough guy and all-around badass. Tried really hard to be Brett's friend. Brett's too much of a scumfuck to keep friends.  
*'''[[VonHelton]]''' - Fellow gormjorb giver and YouTube gord-believer individual. Dumb as a box of [[Food|cocks]].
*'''[[VonHelton]]''' - Fellow gormjorb giver and YouTube gord-believer individual. Dumb as a box of [[Food|cocks]].
*'''[[NephilimFree]]''' - Another Brett Keane lapdog that doesn't know how or when to shut the fuck up and/or hold a conversation. Constantly interrupts and is a complete retard of epic proportions. Espouses offensively easy to debunk talking points.
*'''[[NephilimFree]]''' - Another Brett Keane lapdog that doesn't know how or when to shut the fuck up and/or hold a conversation. Constantly interrupts and like Brett, is a complete retard. Espouses offensively easy to debunk talking points and is a joke in debates. Very annoying individual.
*'''[[Renetto]]''' - Fellow YouTube has-been that pines away for 2006-2007 YouTube, much like Brett. However, unlike Brett, Renetto still produces semi-interesting content every once in a while and does something with his life.
*'''[[Renetto]]''' - Fellow YouTube has-been that pines away for 2006-2007 YouTube, much like Brett. However, unlike Brett, Renetto still produces semi-interesting content every once in a while and does something with his life.
*'''[[ShannyByChrist]]''' - Associate of Brett's. Quite possibly the dumbest person of all time. She does not believe the Moon exists and believes the stars are angels. Even G-man and other creationists question her, which speaks volumes. Has a diamond mole constellation on her face LOL.
*'''[[ShannyByChrist]]''' - Associate of Brett's. Quite possibly the dumbest person of all time. She does not believe the Moon exists and believes the stars are angels. Even G-man and other creationists question her, which speaks volumes. Has a diamond mole constellation on her face LOL.
*'''[[Hacking Team]]''' - David Vincenzetti is a proto-Brett but with less fail.
*'''[[Hacking Team]]''' - David Vincenzetti is a proto-Brett but with less fail.
*'''[[NadiaChambers]]''' - Transgendered individual situation. Brett used them as a prop.
*'''[[NadiaChambers]]''' - Transgendered individual. Brett used them as a prop to virtual signal during his "good" part of the Brett Keane cycle as half-assed ammo against DP.
*'''[[Jaclyn Glenn]]''' - Frenemy to DP. Another guest who immediately saw through Brett Keane's bullshit.
*'''[[Jaclyn Glenn]]''' - Frenemy to DP. Another guest who despite being a fellow plagiarist, immediately saw through Brett Keane's bullshit. However, unlike Brett, at least Jaclyn is hot as fuck and has a decent personality outside of that one mishap.
*'''[[Jenny McDermott]]''' - The female equivalent of Brett, but 100x dumber and more obnoxious. Brett Keane associate.
*'''[[Jenny McDermott]]''' - The female equivalent of Brett, but 100x dumber and more obnoxious. Brett Keane associate.
*'''Pauly Morus''' - Brett Keane's apprentice. Hangs out in Brett Keane's Google hangouts and thinks he's in a position to lecture people when he has a Microsoft Paint chinpube beard and is a self-admitted failure and hopeless retard. Jealous of Dusty and the Peasants' ability to get pussy.
*'''Pauly Morus''' - Brett Keane's apprentice. Hangs out in Brett Keane's Google hangouts and thinks he's in a position to lecture people when he has a Microsoft Paint chinpube beard and is a self-admitted failure and hopeless retard. Jealous of Dusty and the Peasants' ability to get pussy while he whines and laments.


==External links==
==External links==

Latest revision as of 02:46, 1 May 2024

100 shekkels (or more if you have good shit) is currently being offered
to anyone who can prove they know Brett IRL


Message The Drunken Peasants with proof for your money
This person is dying of an unknown terminal disease situation, which randomly causes the eyes to stop working, and impairs the ability to work or walk outside. Please comfort him in his final moments by making sure he dies as painfully as possible.
The most hated God Believer on YouTube
Brett Keane and his friends.


BEHOLD: The biggest loser you'll most likely ever come across in your life. In a sea of misfits and degeneracy, Brett Keane is arguably the biggest, most vile repugnant pile of scumfuck to ever (dis)grace the internet. With the constant lying, retardation, fail, underhandedness, projection and scams, Brett Keane is the best argument for anti-natalism that one could ever need. Just know that if you are ever feeling bad about your own failures and shortcomings as an individual, at least you're not Brett Keane. Below are a bunch of instances and reasons why that is the case. Happy reading!

Who is Brett Keane?

No Emos Allowed.... Well, Except for Brett Himself.
Another day and another account situation for the scrub individjul.

Brett Keane is a 47 year old retarded sociopath, thief, liar, deadbeat, wife-beating, piglike, rapidly aging Goth kid welfare cheat with a pear-head and a sharpied-on mustachio. He lives in a trailer in Festus, Missouri, together with JDub where he spends all day playing Elder Scrolls Ornline and making YouTube videos every five minutes, while his heavily bruised and injured wife works welfares to support the family.
Some may point to people like FakeSagan, Coughlan666, TheAmazingAtheist and Inmendham as examples of atheists who are self-centered, lying twats...but they got nothing on the Keane. Unsurprisingly, Brett does not have any serious socio-political or ideological loyalties, as demonstrated by how he went back and forth from being an atheist to a Christian and back again (and even dabbled in Islam) all in the pursuit of eWelfare. If there's one thing he is loyal too, it's money from gullible fucktards on the internet.

A Little Internet History

How Brett escapes depression

Born illegitimately December 21st 1976 (seriously, he's only 47) to a family of unemployed white trash, an upbringing of domestic violence, drug abuse and emotional, physical trauma and other tumult during childhood and adolescence was unavoidable and has shaped the personality him today.


Somewhere around 2000, Brett Keane first infected the internet (like a fungal rash), with several half-baked websites and message board accounts, where he tried peddling his illiterate Christian Goth "novels" and incompetent attempts at "music".


Unexpectedly, he got banned from every single site his ugly mug appeared on.
He therefore tried to hide his fat head, and use pseudonyms such as Damion Andrews.
Brett Keane started off his YouTube career with surprisingly mundane videos about science and atheism without even showing his face and in the most inoffensive way possible. As his videos started getting more attention, this single feeble iota of power went to his bloated head, and he began appearing on camera (to the displeasure of everyone), proclaiming himself "the sexiest YouTube atheist" and making 400,000 videos a day.


He began posting insulting insultive videos mocking random YouTubers for not being atheists. Then he made videos on every topic in existence. Politics, video games, fitness, there wasn't a topic this genius wouldn't pontificate about, not because he gave a shit or knew anything about this stuff, he just did it because he wanted to get his videos to be the top rated in every subject.


Brett began to build a (very, very small) cult following. Soon, the other 99.9999999% of YouTube (that existed outside of the microscopic Brett Keane Tonguebath Cult) began to criticize him for his shallow, dull and inane videos. Manbearpig lost his shit like a Gorilla on a strict diet of All-bran and Ex-Lax.


He began blocking and insulting everyone, foolishly believing his ass was bulletproof. It got so deranged, even his former fans crusaded against him. This led to the paranoid fatass releasing personal info on other (sometimes random) YouTube channels that he blamed for all his troubles. In Brett's fevered imagination, it's always a cabal of two or three people that are behind his failures to thrive.


This led to a righteous Banhammer smiting, and his migrating in disgrace to other websites, such as LiveVideo before his antics led to bans there as well. Eventually, he tried several times to come back to YouTube, only to be told to GTFO.

He has obtained a cheated youtube partnership from FattyCabbie, so he can supplement his welfare checks with JewTube dollars, because that is totally allowed.

To see that every accusation against Brett is true


 
 

"What's next? What are you gonna do now? You gonna pawn me, ask me some more stupid questions, about something you think happened years ago, or whatever? I don't care. I am wasting my time with you, d0pe. No more attention for you kid."
 


 

How he became the most hated man on the internet

Plagiarizing

Lightfingered Brett never met an anything he wouldn't gladly steal. Considering how he has everything just handed to him by the Gubmint and his dull-witted fanbase...he doesn't see why everything else shouldn't be free for the taking as well. Speaking of his fanbase, most of them are his own sock puppets. Pathetic. The remaining individuals are Drunken Peasants fans who are only there to laugh at Brett's loser ass. He's been caught claiming ownership of an essay that he merely copypasted. He's been caught claiming ownership of poems that he merely copypasted. He's been caught claiming ownership of Here's a non-YouTube mirror song lyrics that he merely copypasted. To him, anything that can be acquired through Ctrl+C and Ctrl+V is same as a valid purchase.

His most famous copypasta moment was when he stole the work of female Judy Burnette, really a good choice with his newly found feminism.

Use scrollbar to see the full text

So many image race through my mind

whenever I speak your name
It seems without you in my life things will never be the same

What happened to those days When I was just a child
The Innocence When my life was consumed in you. In your life and in your smile

What happened to all those times when I always looked to you
No matter what happened in my life You always got me through

I turn to see your face Yet in my turning...it seems
the sound has been erased when life does not make sense

Who will be there to hold me close when the pieces just don't fit
if I could turn back time and once more hear your voice

I would tell you always know I love you and no one can take your place
Years may come and go but your memory will never be erased

Brett's "original" text


Use scrollbar to see the full text

Dad...so many images come to mind

whenever I speak your name;
It seems without you in my life things have never been the same.

What happened to those lazy days when I was just a child;
When my life was consumed in you in your love, and in your smile.

What happened to all those times when I always looked to you;
No matter what happened in my life you could make my gray skies blue.

Dad, some days I hear your voice and turn to see your face;
Yet in my turning...it seems the sound has been erased.

Dad, who will I turn to for answers when life does not make sense;
Who will be there to hold me close when the pieces just don't fit.

Oh, Dad, if I could turn back time and once more hear your voice;
I'd tell you that out of all the dads you would still be my choice.

Please always know I love you and no one can take your place;
Years may come and go but your memory will never be erased.

Today, Jesus, as You are listening in your home above;
Would you go and find my dad and give him all my love.

Judy Burnett's poem



The original theft

Stealing from other people

How he stole lyrics from HIM


  • Brett copy-pasted the entirety of this in a song he called Life Is A Prison
  • Brett copy-pasted the entirety of this in a song he called When Is It Time
  • Brett copy-pasted the entirety of Stupid Game Of Me in a song he called Marching into Hell, that featured the iconic Hell March theme from Red Alert.
  • Brett copy-pasted the entirety of the lyrics written by a 15 year old girl (Still better at English than Brett will ever be)
  • Brett spliced together another YouTubers videos and passed them off as his own
  • Brett used to host a website where he ripped off news and passed them off as his own, without ever giving a source
  • Brett couldn't make his own shitty YouTube background so he stole one.
  • Brett copy-pasted the entiry of a rotten.com article into a video and passed it off as his own. To top it off he even put it on top of Slayer's South of Heaven, that was played in full.
  • Brett copy-pasted an article from Yahoo Finance
  • There are countless other examples of Brett stealing full lyrics, riffs, news, backgrounds, videos, whatever you can imagine.

Showing his wife love...with his fists

It was bad enough suspecting that he beats his wife; but MOM also felt the loving care of his amateur ass-kicking. Here's Brett trying to tell two different, mutually contradictory versions of why his wife filed a restraining order against Mr. Toad and his Pummeling Fists of Marital Bliss.

Apparently, the Grungy Huffalump has a Mean Streak


 
 

"This is really fucking sick"
 


 

Brett Keane not realizing he is talking about his own trifling ass.
Brett's "strangle teh wife" pose.

When backed into a corner, Brett will -- completely out of nowhere -- accuse his detractors of "attacking his wife"; which is cracked, because the only person people bitch about is Brett himself. He has made this accusation hundreds of times, but only one time has anyone ever said an unkind word about Dawn.
And here's it is, right from their sister-in-law....

Use scrollbar to see the full text

i have known brett for at least 18 years, Dawn for at least 20 years ( because she is my step sister). The truth about Brett and Dawn is that they are both LIARS. They where a match made in heaven. They will never amount to anything in there life except for being shit bums. Everything that comes out of there mouths is a lie. The only thing that they have to do in life is sit on the computer and spew there psyco babble bull shit. And trust me thats all it is is BULL SHIT. In this video they are dogging the step mother but that same mother bought them a car, moved them to a new state, took care of the kids when Dawn left Brett multiple times, took them money when ever they needed it. So ill let you make you own assumption about my mother. The only reason they are blaming her is because she cut them off. Now they are loosing there home and who do they call my mother. Asking to move in with her. So if one person is sooooo bad why in the hell would you ask a question like that. Again they are USERS and LOOSERS. So hopefully every one will get the message. And call them out on all the lies they have told"



Brett Keane The Musician Individual


The original E-beggar

June 2010
His house was supposedly going on auction. Begged for money.

Fall 2010
The Xbox360 slim is released. Fatty decides he needs one. Probably why he made up the story about getting shit-canned in the first place.

October 2010
Apparently forgets to pay rent from this month.

December 2010
Highlights his Amazon wish list in a video. Mentions how his kid already has an Xbox 360 Slim, and would like a Wii. The list totals $2,300

January 2011
Makes a video crying about how he is going to get evicted, for not paying rent since October. Magically the money needs $2,300. lines up perfectly with how much his Amazon wish list came to.

February 2011
Adds yet another item to his wish-list

March 2011
Now his new contract is up, and he could be evicted at any time. And he needs your money, so his family doesn't starve to death. How are they supposed to eat without a brand new Wii?


I'm rich and you bitch

Faking agoraphobia

Agoraphobia is fear of open spaces. So when Brett claims to suffer from this one shouldn't be expecting to see him

In a wide open forest
Brett Keane Outside9.jpg
Outside this mansion in a wide open space
Brett Keane Outside17.jpg
Strolling down this street,
without a care in the world
At this park in the middle of St. Louis
Brett Keane Outside9.jpg
Outside this mansion in a wide open space
Brett Keane Outside17.jpg
Strolling down this street,
without a care in the world


[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Being worse at gaming than DarkSydePhil

   
 
Since I am pretty well-known in the gaming world, out there, a lot of people have watched my videos in the past. I find whenever I play MMO's or games like this, having to do with other users online, I tend to run into people, who have watched my videos, who like my work, and then they feel they wanna protect me and defend me and all that. I can't tell you one time playing a RTS game where an army has been able to kick my ass, because so many people have wanted to protect my little empires and shit.
 

 
 

—Brett Keane, I'm Building an Empire and I Won't Be Defeated.

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

World Of Warcraft

   
 
Yes ladies and gentlemen, I am back to playing World Of Warcraft.
 

 
 

Brett Keane and family getting destroyed in WoW, by one guy

Blocked J-dubs over WoW



[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]
Wanted a mount, so he e-begged

The X-53 Touring Rocket is a scam mount created by Blizzard, in order to get stupid WoW players into recruiting their friends, or using their details, in order to get a mount. And of course Brett wanted in on that action. More important than getting a job. Having already used all of his options in terms of friends, meaning he already used their details, he was unable to get this DLC. So off to YouTube and e-beg and cry. And somewhere some pathetic lonely basement dweller actually decided to pay money for this game, just so Brett could fly around before getting ganked repeatedly.

Brett_Keane_WoW_Please_Suck_My_Rocket.jpg
Please help me not get a job
Brett_Keane_WoW_Suck_My_Rocket_Video.jpg
The video
Brett_Keane_WoW_Brettkeane_Warrior_On_Rocket.jpg
Look at me not getting a job

Created fake book reviews for his retarded books

Brett is an arthur. Not an author, that would require him to be able to spell it. His books read like they were written by a dyslexic 6th grader who had one hour to turn in a 20 page assignment. None of his books got sold, as they are the worst thing ever put to paper. So he had to find out a new way to pawn off his Christian goth edgelord novels onto unsuspecting customers. The idea was to misuse Amazon.com's review system, by making up fake websites, or just downright posing as those, and writing positive reviews.

Brett's reviews of his own book
   
 
Detective Reznor is by far the greatest detective I have ever read about.
 

 
 

—Brett pretending to be detectivelovers.org

   
 
Finally a book that gives life to demons & vampires
 

 
 

—Brett pretending to be Horror.com

   
 
Gommorah the witch is my favorite character. She is intellingent & cunning.
 

 
 

—Brett pretending to be Pagans.com

   
 
The book is a Hellish rollercoaster that I had the pleasure of riding!
 

 
 

—Brett pretending to be Brett's own website www.serpentscradle.com

Actual reviews of his book

Eternal Undying Love
   
 
...this is one of the three worst books for sale on Amazon. The other two are also in this series.

The book is poorly written. The plot is woeful. The dialogue seems to be written by children...

Please, please, please do not waste your money buying this book or your time reading it.
 


 
 

—C. VEAR

   
 
This book is self published and it shows. The writing is choppy, the plot is disconnected and Mr. Keane's punctuation and grammar need serious work. Dialogue is not even comic book worthy.
 

 
 

—jan hicks

   
 
Brett keane is well known on youtube as a liar. He has accounts that he uses for flagging so i bet that he has some accounts on amazon to promote his book. Some of his reviews are most likely fake.
 

 
 

—Brian McGee

   
 
I bought a copy of this book through Amazon. The writing is extremely poor. This "author" doesn't even know how to divide text into paragraphs, so he inserts blank lines, right in the middle of sentences, to create the appearance of paragraphs on the page. That's how bad it is.
 

 
 

—Doug Jones

   
 
I love scifi. I thought I'd love this, but it sucks. Looks like it was written for a child and by a child, I mean like 10 yrs old. Who does the proof reading of these books? The author must've had all his friends vote for this book, cuz it stinks. So, now I'm back to reading Steven King books only. Is there a place I can return it?
 

 
 

—A Kid's Review

   
 
Brett Keane needs to learn how to punctuate and use paragraphs properly. To be 100% honest. I've seen young children to better....

It's just that quite of the book is written somewhat like this: Tom said "I hate you" Jim shook his head "I don't like you either" "FINE be that way" "Behave!" Mother called out. "I don't want to behave" "If you don't behave I'll kill you" "Go way!".

Who's saying what? It's easy to get lost.... Each one of those pieces of dialogue should be a paragraph of their own.
 


 
 

—Orphan

   
 
It's bad! I read a few pages before buying, not worth pirating for free much less 15 bucks.
 

 
 

—Chip

   
 
Worst book ever made! 0/10!
 

 
 

—Peace

   
 
I don't know how this got published, but whoever considered it worth publishing was clearly polluted with the same mental sludge as the author. My peers were writing better stories, using better grammar, than this back when we were 10.
 

 
 

—Liam Reilly

   
 
I bought this book at a used bookstore for $2.00. I read two chapters of this book before promptly throwing it into the recycling bin. There is nothing about those two chapters worth mentioning except that it completely sucked. A few websites mention the fact that this book's editorial reviews were faked or fabricated. Save your money, don't buy this book.
 

 
 

—CATAHA

   
 
Brett Keane is a terrible writer. The characterizations are weak, the plot makes no sense, the prose makes E. L. James look like William Shakespeare, and the pacing is choppy and all over the place.

DO NOT READ THIS BOOK by the indivijul we like to call brett "The Manatee" Keane situation.
 


 
 

—christchin020


False flagging, DMCAing and blocking everyone who disagrees with him

This video is no longer available due to a copyright claim by Brett Keane


Plagiarism, fake book reviews, wife beating, horrible gaming, e-begging what else could Brett possibly do that make himself more unlikable? Well, flag down anyone who dares to criticize him, of course. And if that doesn't work, send a DMCA, hope they counter-claim and use it to dox them. So was the case when straightd0pe made a video exposing him, and Brett was quick to retaliate by firing off the DMCA's.


And there are literally dozens of examples of Brett Keane DMCAing people.
And that's before we get to him and his butt-buddy JDubs flagging everyone. When the DMCA was successful all Burger Keane had to do was wait in order for the people affected to counter-notice, using their legal name, so he could proudly present it to the world. As was the case with straightd0pe, when he tried to claim that his real name was Edward. He later changed that story into that he found this name by doing a Google search. He later changed that story into that Gimmabreakman mentioned it in a video. A complete hackjob of a video. And he has obviously used this on myriads of other people as well.

So many examples About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Debating the Brett Keane Way

If you were to ask Brett (of even if you DON'T ASK) he'll gladly tell you about his perfect record of never being defeated in a debate. This perfect record, of course, skips all of those times he has been defeated in debate. Which happens every time he debates someone.

Want to "Pawn" all the trolls telling hurtful truths about you and your eBegggin', ego-strokin' self?

Pawn Trolls
This is how to "Pawn" Trolls.
Simplified
A simple plan for a simple man.
UberSimplified
A simple plan for a simple caveman, printed sloppily in crayon on drool-proof paper.


Brett Keane is being protected by Individuals At YouTube.com

Looks like Brett Keane sucked enough YouTube jannys' cocks, making him unbannable on the platform. If anyone reports his channel nothing will happen. Even though YouTube knows he often violates YouTube's terms of service by bullying others or bashing their religious beliefs, he is still unbannable.

If you have the time, feel free to file a report against his YouTube channel and see for yourself. He is being protected by YouTube, he will never be banned.

Brett Keane vs. The Drunken Peasants

From 2014 to now, Brett Keane's videos were and still are featured on The Drunken Peasants Podcast countless times where he's been exposed for being a massive fucking retard and LOLcow. The best of the saga was from 2014-2017. This saga has revived what meager relevance Brett had to begin with and produced some of the best YouTube gold ornline.


From 2014 to 2015 most of Brett's content was covered by DP in an intellectual way, debunking his stupidity. The Peasants, most notably The Amazing Atheist and his cohost and brother Scotty would rip Brett Keane a new asshole by reviewing his videos, all of which were complete dogshit. Early on in 2014, Brett and the Peasants had two debates. Because Brett was such a pussy and such a lightweight, he brought on his buddies NephilimFree, G-man, J-dubs, TrueEmpiricism and ShannyByChrist on as back-up. What ensued was a hilarious clusterfuck of epic proportions. All of them gave Christianity an even worse name that it already had by being the biggest gaggle of fucktards imaginable. Much to no one's surprise, none of them could adequately defend their positions as they were all soundly defeated. I'd have more confidence hiring a bunch of Down syndrome individuals to defend Christianity, as they would do better. If Brett had any self-respect, you'd think he'd end contact here but you'd be sorely mistaken.

Brett, being a glutton for punishment, had another debate with the Peasants and the same thing happened. Brett was now on DP's radar. Big mistake for the manatee. For the rest of 2014 through mid-2015, the Peasants would cover Brett's videos in a mostly intellectual way, with some drama. Personal attacks and drama were usually not at the forefront but did naturally escalate over time as insults and internet mudslinging increased.

Drunken Peasants v. Brett Keane: The Great Drama War of 2016

The drama war would not kick off until PaulsEgo would become a co-host. Paul claimed to be a Brett Keane historian and would epically pawn Brett, revealing his scumfuckery for the world to see. This couldn't be further apparent in Episode 166. Brett can claim all he wants that 2006 era of YouTube was the highlight of his channel and existence on the internet but it was really this era. Brett's too much of an oblivious retard to see that this is both the best and worst thing that happened to him. Below is an approximate timeline of major events, detailing this timeless content goldmine:


EPISODE 166: The catalyst for the Great Drama War of 2016. Brett would come on solo and get brutally buttfucked by DP. DP'd by DP but 4 vs. 1 instead with TJ, Paul, Scotty and Ben all taking turns refuting Brett Keane and ripping the retarded manatee a new, stanky asshole. It was a beatdown situation. The Peasants covered Brett's e-begging, chronic lying, attention whoring, plagiarizing, idiotic actions, framing FakeSagan by calling his kids waterheads and totally destroyed Brett on the whole "like father, like son" mindset. Brett cowardly went after TJ's father (who was dead and unable to defend himself) for scamming people. His argument was that because TJ's father was a scammer, so was TJ. The Peasants once again destroyed the fat retard. It was this episode that "French Vanilla situation" emerged. For those of you who are unaware, this was Brett's code for bathroom break and it conveniently came up every time the Peasants brought up a good point against him. Anyone who was not a complete retard knew that Brett was actually crying like a little bitch to Dorn. Now DP viewers knew that Brett was not only retarded and a landlocked manatee but was also profoundly scummy and a massive pussy. Terrible combo. The drama war would kick off very quickly after. The gloves were off now in the situation. After this point, anytime the Peasants covered Brett it was less about an intellectual exchange of ideas and more about fighting with Brett and ripping him a new one and milking him for the LOLcow that he was, is and always will be. The Peasants saw the manatee as content and milked the fuck out of him.

EPISODE 219: On the post show, TJ declared that he was done with Brett and that Brett was officially on his shitlist. TJ went off on a tirade about how Brett was a piece of shit for false-flagging and false DMCAing.

EPISODE 232: Ben cucks TJ and plays an old-school garage video where TJ fellates Brett. PaulsEgo laughs his ass off at TJ simping over the manatee.

EPISODE 234: Brett challenges DP. TJ counter-challenges by offering Bretty boo-boo a grand to flash them gums.

EPISODE 235: The Peasants interrogate Brett on his new alliance with Joseph Martelli who stalked DP like the psycho that he was and is. Brett weasels his way out like always by failing to give a straight answer.

EPISODE 236: The Manatee is paid $1000 for showing his gums and toothless mouth. Gormjorb giver confirmed.

EPISODE 240: Brett challenges 30 atheists to a fight. BIG LOL. The Peasants covered it with Jaclyn Glenn as a guest and thoroughly dismantled him, again.

EPISODE 260: The Peasants spend an hour going onto Brett's GamesULove channel and heckling him as he fucked up the game and acted like a meandering retard. "Give me a gumjob Brett" was the main heckle.

EPISODE 288.5: The Peasants announce that they offered to pay Brett a $1000 to come on to be interrogated. This was after Scotty destroyed the camera.

EPISODE 289: The Peasants try and fail to get Brett on the show. They raid his livestream and are met with PomJam and JDubs who take turns kissing Brett's ass and making themselves even lower than Brett. Beta cucks.

EPISODE 302: The Peasants would have Brett on with TommyFromTheBronx as a guest. Ben, who was normally very chill, laid into Brett like never before. Very similar to Episode 166 but with Ben's fury at the forefront. This last point shows you how intense this drama war was at this stage where the chillest member of DP raged at the fat retarded manatee.

EPISODE 311: It is revealed by a furious PaulsEgo that Brett Keane doxed Paul, his then girlfriend and their dog Dinoaur by giving Joseph Martelli their address. The Peasants were furious. Brett's scumfuckery couldn't be more apparent in this moment. The catalyst for kneecapping the drama war and starving the manatee.

EPISODE 313: It was announced that the Peasants would no longer cover Brett for a 3-month hiatus, thus knee-capping and ending The Great Drama War of 2016 as the episode was streamed at the end of December anyway.

The Comprehensive List of KNOWN Keaneisms

The term "Keaneism" derives from the Drunken Peasants. A Keaneism is where Brett Keane completely butchers the English language, has a brain shart and makes a total retard of himself. Below are a list of KNOWN things Brett has said over the years where he completely butchers the English language and makes anyone paying any attention to him lose what meager faith they had in humanatee to begin with:


  • "A lot of you guys committed suicide" = Brett not knowing how death or continuity works. What a fucking R-E-T-A-R-D LOL.
  • "Annolf Hidler" = Adolf Hitler. C'mon the fuck on Brett.
  • "Apalegy" = Apology
  • "Arsenary" = Arsenal
  • "Blow-up Dowel" = Blow-up doll
  • "Charistics" = Characteristics
  • "Chat GBD" = Chat GPT; It's a fucking acronym Brett. He can't even get a fucking acronym right.
  • "Consciousness" = Conscience; something a certain individual is clearly lacking
  • "Crona Virus" = Coronavirus
  • "Dickless Penises" = Brett Keane's failed attempt at mocking The Drunken Peasants' name
  • "Diploma Mills" = Not knowing what a Diploma mill is
  • "Dorn" = Dawn, his Mac & cheese and chili bitch; Stepford wife sole breadwinner individual
  • "Dowel" = Doll
  • "Drop a TJ and Scotty off at the pool" = Taking a shit and a piss
  • "Drug seller" = Drug dealer
  • "Duplicious" = Duplicitous
  • "During the rind of Zayo Da Dong.. what a fucked up name that guy's got!" = The most ridiculously retarded Keaneism of all time
  • "Even Holyfield" = Evander Holyfield
  • "Fallaxy" = Fallacy
  • "French vanilla situation" = Piss and shit
  • "Gord" = God
  • "Gord believer" = Theist
  • "Gorn" = Gone
  • "Hello everybody this is the Stallion" = Brett trying and failing to be funny
  • "I keep on asking myself, c'mon Gord" = Brett inadvertently admitting his Gord complex situation
  • "Individual situation" = All-time Brett Keane classic
  • "Invention" = Volition
  • "Investigative" = Intriguing?
  • "Insultive" = Insulting
  • "Kran" = Quran
  • "Lawrence Cross" = Lawrence Krauss
  • "Liability and slander" = Libel and slander
  • "Lucy-Anna" = Louisiana
  • "Mind quote" = Quote mine
  • "Mr. HoeVined" = Kent Hovind
  • "Muslamic Turbine" = Islamic turban
  • "Narcism" = Narcissism
  • "No cheese" = Brett being an ungrateful individual
  • "Nukaler" = Nuclear
  • "Old Scotsman Story" = No True Scotsman Fallaxy
  • "Orn" = On
  • "Paradoy" = Parody
  • "Pawned" = Pwned
  • "Popshots" = Potshots
  • "Quander" = Question + Ponder
  • "Rind" = Reign
  • "Scim bag" = Scumbag
  • "Sittin' there" = Sitting there
  • "Spirichality" = Spirituality
  • "Stalin's Rine" = Stalin's Reign
  • "Stibulations" = Stipulations
  • "TJ's micromanagement" = Brett's gay obsession with TJ's micropenis
  • "Trickle down sense of humor" = Down to earth sense of humor
  • "Truffles of atheists" = Gaggles of atheists
  • "Ulttahmaytumm" = Ultimatum
  • "V.I." = Via
  • "Violtes" = Violates
  • "When life deals you a curveball" = When life throws you a curveball
  • "Wicklepedia" = Wikipedia
  • "Working on all cinderblocks" = Fire on all cylinders
  • "Zayo De Dong" = Mao Zedong


Brett Keane Vs. Highdeology & DEEP FAT FRIED/ONION NUGGETS (2023)

Brett Keane, being the giant rotting herpe sore that he is, still lingers on the internet and namely YouTube in 2023 at 46 years old. Yes, you heard me correctly, Brett's still trying despite the mountain of failure that is his existence. This sad pathetic fact is a catalyst for the latest and much more recent and therefore relevant drama situation. On February 10, 2023, the boys at Deep Fat Fried: TJ, Paul and Scotty were doing an Onion Nuggets show. Brett and a fake Brett account (aka his alt or some smartass troll) were talking a bunch of shit in chat. This was clearly an attempt by the Brettster to make a name for himself again and get some internet brownie points. What an attention whore individual. Brett was subsequently dunked on for a couple minutes and then banned by Paul.

An hour or so later, Paul's channel, Highdeology aka the original PaulsEgo channel (that had been on YouTube since 2007) was suddenly banned for no reason. The reasons given by YouTube were multiple "violations" of the BS YouTube TOS, namely "hate speech", which if you know anything about the situation with this PaulsEgo individual, you'd know that that is complete bullshit. The only logical explanation was that in an act of revenge from being banned in chat, Brett went back to his old ways and mass-flagged Highdeology into oblivion. There is surely more to follow!

Brett Keane's Allies and Detractors

  • Brett Keane - Our hero. The most pathetic person on YouTube, and quite possibly planet Earth. At least you're not Brett Keane!
  • Dorn - Brett Keane's Mac & Cheese bitch, slave, wife and punching bag. Complicit in Brett's bullshit and lacks any self-respect or intelligence. She sounds like she smokes 10 packs of Newports a day.
  • Waterheads - Brett Keane's children. Brett being able to reproduce is one of the many reasons why incels have no excuse.
  • JDubs - Brett's fat and retarded lap dog sycophant. Imagine sucking up to Brett Keane LOL.
  • TheAmazingAtheist - An all-around cool guy. King edge-lord. One of the last of the OG YouTube atheists still standing. He saw Brett as an inspiration back in the day, a man who stood on the rocks as the waves crashed against him.
  • PaulsEgo - The Brett Keane historian and situation extraordinaire. Can pawn Brett like no other.
  • The Drunken Peasants - A podcast that has spent COUNTLESS hours punking Brett's bitch ass and exposing him for the fat, sociopathic, mouth-breathing retard that he is.
  • CultOfDusty - Edgy motherfucker that stirs the drama pot and starts controversy on the internet. Fucks hot bitches and is the bane of Pauly Morus' existence.
  • Coughlan666 - Another one of the OGs of YouTube atheism in the 2006-2007 era of YouTube atheism. Has since turned into a whiny feminist faggot. One of Brett's mass false flagging victims. Brett of course denied this, only to admit it later on like the weasly rotund scumfuck that he is.
  • HappyCabbie - His best friend who has died.
  • Devon Tracey - Bald wannabe alpha male. Brett kissed his ass only to be cucked and rejected by Devon. Amazing. Brett minor detractor.
  • PomJam - Retard that tried to play both Brett and The Drunken Peasants. He either sounds like he's falling asleep or cumming in his fucking pants whenever he talks. He is as boring as Shanny is dumb; staggeringly so. Adds nothing to the conversation.
  • G-Man - Loudmouth retard YouTube creationist. Regardless of his fucktardation, he is still an entertaining person who is ultimately harmless. Denies starving children exist in the world. "Owns" people in arguments and is CLEARLY the quintessential logician. The Kanye West of YouTube creationism.
  • FakeSagan - Brett's frenemy. Like Brett, a pathetic YouTube has-been. Former enemy of Brett, later sucked his cock and became Brett's toadie and ballwasher and then hated him again during the final stages of The Great Drama War of 2016. Pulled a gun on TheAmazingAtheist.
  • Joseph Martelli - Fake tough guy. Fellow DP detractor and Brett's henchman; the two teamed up to dox PaulsEgo. Claims to be a former faggot (no such thing). Sucks a lot of sissy boy dick.
  • TommyFromTheBronx - Actual tough guy and all-around badass. Tried really hard to be Brett's friend. Brett's too much of a scumfuck to keep friends.
  • VonHelton - Fellow gormjorb giver and YouTube gord-believer individual. Dumb as a box of cocks.
  • NephilimFree - Another Brett Keane lapdog that doesn't know how or when to shut the fuck up and/or hold a conversation. Constantly interrupts and like Brett, is a complete retard. Espouses offensively easy to debunk talking points and is a joke in debates. Very annoying individual.
  • Renetto - Fellow YouTube has-been that pines away for 2006-2007 YouTube, much like Brett. However, unlike Brett, Renetto still produces semi-interesting content every once in a while and does something with his life.
  • ShannyByChrist - Associate of Brett's. Quite possibly the dumbest person of all time. She does not believe the Moon exists and believes the stars are angels. Even G-man and other creationists question her, which speaks volumes. Has a diamond mole constellation on her face LOL.
  • Hacking Team - David Vincenzetti is a proto-Brett but with less fail.
  • NadiaChambers - Transgendered individual. Brett used them as a prop to virtual signal during his "good" part of the Brett Keane cycle as half-assed ammo against DP.
  • Jaclyn Glenn - Frenemy to DP. Another guest who despite being a fellow plagiarist, immediately saw through Brett Keane's bullshit. However, unlike Brett, at least Jaclyn is hot as fuck and has a decent personality outside of that one mishap.
  • Jenny McDermott - The female equivalent of Brett, but 100x dumber and more obnoxious. Brett Keane associate.
  • Pauly Morus - Brett Keane's apprentice. Hangs out in Brett Keane's Google hangouts and thinks he's in a position to lecture people when he has a Microsoft Paint chinpube beard and is a self-admitted failure and hopeless retard. Jealous of Dusty and the Peasants' ability to get pussy while he whines and laments.

External links

http://grooveshark.com/#!/brettkeanemusic/broadcast http://www.fastswf.com/uzxzXZI Have fun making brett keane look more stupid in this soundboard. https://youtu.be/AnP_aJUg8jg

Brett's Own Accounts and sockpuppets

https://www.youtube.com/c/GodTvRadioShow Brett's current channel as of July 2022. The Manatee doesn't know when to quit.

UCL-1Xa8vXblDQvKa9_6pWKg Theist Brett Keane. He returns, he trolls, he fucks off, history repeats itself. Assume it's the same channel, but the name is changed, to try and look important. Just another shit show for the Drunken Peasants to troll him again.

UCBK0ImkwyIuQ6bxGuymSHMA GodTvRadioInternal Just another whoring youtube account to suck on Donald_Trump's teat and shitty attempt to come out of retirement. Then he dies again and gains more weight to throw up another channel.

  • GamesULoveAnother channel along with Jdubs who hasn't tried to an_hero yet again for his attention seeking and being brett's pet. Channels gorn

down so soon. Rest in pieces of shit.

  • BrettKeaneHollywood With a name that he has delusional celebrity status. Even if it's for beating his wife, false flagging, pissing off his haters and trolls. Obviously

targeted for termination in the next days or months on. Banned for spambait

  • Sub2KeaneVlogs Another one. He's also back, how long will his fat fingers last if he starts false_flagging? But he's not even relevant anymore since 2007. Even so he's just advertisting his brother's band Flagged for trying to pwn MrRepzion. Shit He has his wife on there at gunpoint trying to whore out his cheated partnered channel.
  • blackdethmetal His brother's band, nothing of importance. Maybe a song about ebegging or beating your wife would be suitable.
  • Gforlife77 Socketpuppet alert! Closed. Obviously.
  • KeaneVlogs HOLY FUCKING SITUATION THE FAT FUCK GOT PWNED BY MIZZSTAR, THOUGH WE'LL EXCEPT HIS FAT ASS RETURN SOONER OR LATER 2013 SMACKDOWN SITUATION SPECIAL: BACK FOR MORE Unwarranted_self_importance DRAMA THIEF ALERT !!! Make sure to double check for any PLAGIARISM!!!It might be and so he can talk about shit_no_one_cares_about all over again. Also back on his channel. Hoping he'll start shit with the haters and trolls again.
  • BrettKeaneVidz Apparently a fan boy or his socket account made so when he gets butthurt over haters and trolls. He goes over there to cry about it.
  • AliCross510 Socket account to harass and troll William Ga's Google hangout, because Brett wants to be the little girl.
  • BrettKeane2HOT4YT(Meaning he's too hot for older women and wants his pedophile) He's now friends with HappyCabbie, BFF, after removing two of his strikes that were meant to be on his channel for being a huge retarded blob, and they can go both get cancer, meanwhile while MimicVendetta, portraying anonymous has caused a shitstorm, to make brett look like a fool by having other dude pretend to be his white_knight. Brett's response is just him being butthurt while golf clapping. Meaning ready to smack his wife afterwards. This account was too much cancer for youtube.
  • PopeLovesCandy Brett's Newest Channel (first two videos is his introduction and some failed trolling attempt against a user named Benos and ShredderNeverDies, which also predicts he's going to make videos on another users that said bad and truthful things about him, because his cyber bullying site wasn't enough.] Well gaydubs obviously is the first one to comment on his vids, because he wants to fuck brett rape. Closed until he shits out a another new main account
  • MrEvilution777 Click the Link. It clearly states he closed the account himself.
  • BrettKeaneWarcraft His channel devoted to the World of Warcraft he insists he never plays anymore. CLOSED!

Failed Websites

LOL GORN AGAIN. When you thought he was gorn. Even when he failed to retire from life. His retirement from youtube or anything else don't last very long. Like his weight gain.

  • http://brettkeanevideo.com/ NOPE FALSE ALARM, IT'S BACK UP The site was dead, looks like it's time for the ebegging season to begin. Because he's so shit at keeping a website together, because he has no real job to begin with. He's too busy white knighting Onision as to getting into other people's dramas. Note: Don't go to his website, all it'll do is give him money. Arvixe the webhoster pwned him for cyberstalking and like every brettkeanevideo webhoster pwned him for the millionth time.
  • http://keanevlogs.blogspot.com Apparently, the blog was hacked to make brett look less badass.
  • Golgothica One of his many failed websites.

His "Exposing Cyber-Bullies" Page (note the self-fellating URL.)

Gallery

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Brett Keane is part of a series on YouTube.

Visit the YouTube Portal