View source for Al Gore


{{quote|During my service in the United States Congress I took the initiative in creating the Internet [as well as taking place in making up [[bullshit|Global Warming]]].|AL Gore|on CNN, March 1999}}


[[Image:Gore_stfu_internet.jpg|thumb|left|Plz refrain from angering Al.]]
[[Image:Gore_Turd.gif|thumb|Gore's speech is closed captioned for the hearing impaired]]
[[Image:Gorespeshul.jpg|thumb|Al Gore strikes a blow for all Special Needs children]]
[[Image:Gore_al.jpg|thumb|Al Gore raising a fist on a helpless child (not pictured)]]
[[Image:Algoreloli.jpg|thumb|Al Gore with his [[Jailbait|favorite audience]]]]

=Who Exactly is Al Gore?=
[[Image:AlGore-PolarBearAffair.jpg|thumb]]

'''Al Gore''', or [[Cereal Guy]] is the Emperor of the his own country, [[Gorea]], inventor of the [[Internets]], circa 1992 and the inventor of the pokeball. He has ridden the mighty Moon Worm and slain the ferocious [[pedobear|manbearpig]] with extreme [[furry|fury]]. He ran for President of USA but lost to a [[W|Monkey]] over which he was seriously [[butthurt]] and grew a really creepy beard. It's rumored that Gore uses unnecessarily elongated words to compensate for his [[asian|incredibly small]] penis.

He is a very boring person. Sometimes, when he talks at people, they commit [[suicide]] because he's so boring, however, little do they know they are [[doing it wrong]]. [[Dying alone|He also has no friends because of this]], and because he constantly uses the word "cereal".

Al won an Oscar, an Emmy and a Nobel Peace Prize all in the same year, basically for being the guy who [[fail|lost]] to George Bush. After winning the Nobel Prize he spent the fucking night [[masturbation|wanking]]. This is because his wife, Tipper Whore, is a cyborg with a stainless steel vagina (clang clang).

[[Government|They]] have recently started marketing a new [[death|sleep aid]] in form of [[boring|video]] entitled [[Gay|"The Inconcievable Truth"]], featuring [[Douchebag|the man himself]]. This has been [[truth|proven]] [[rape|effective]] and [[lie|sales have gone up]].

[[Image:YiUZCJbgcp albundyya0.jpg|thumb|right|The similarities are astounding...]]

= Humongous Hypocrisy =

[[Image:Al's_Humongus_Hypocracy.jpg‎]]

How's that for a Fucking Inconvenient Truth  
[[Over 9000|"IT'S OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND!"]]

= Rise Of The Anti-Christ =


In [[ASCII]] code, "al gore" = 97 + 108 + 32 + 103 + 111 + 114 + 101 = 666, therefore Al Gore is the anti-Christ.

=Al's Initiatives=
=== Global Warming ===
[[Image:Goreah.jpg|thumb|left|Al Gore- The Original [[Wapanese]]]]
[[Image:Ysocereal.jpg|thumb|[[Why So Serious?|Why so cereal?]]]]
[[Image:Polarbearcanhasalgore.jpg|center|150px]]

Al Gore invented '''[[Global Warming]]''' [[over 9000]] years ago to kill off [[emo|emotards]] and Jews. He admits it in this quote: "During my service in the United StatesCongress, I took the initiative in creating the Global Warming." How he managed to do such a feat remains a mystery today; [[allege|some allege]] while standing on his porch in [[Tennessee]], he threw a lasso around the Sun and pulled it closer to Earth. Others say he was standing on the Sun and threw a lasso around the Earth and pulled it closer to him. The real explanation is lost to the sands of [[time]], unfortunately.

As Al began to [[troll's remorse|regret]] taking the initiative to create Global Warming, he decided to have a concert to raise Global Warming awareness called "Live Earth". It was held on 7/07/07, and 74,500 tons of carbon dioxide gas were produced by the event. Thanks Al.

Every time Al Gore testifies on Capitol Hill on global warming, mother nature sends a big snowstorm or hailstorm to welcome him.  This has happened so many times it has been nicknamed the "Gore Effect".  Mother nature enjoys making Al Gore look like an idiot because mother nature [[shit nobody cares about|does not care]] what Al Gore thinks the sea level should be.  When he speaks at MIT, mother nature doesn't need to do anything to make him look like an idiot since the science [[geek]]s there will just play a round of [[lulz|Buzzword Bingo]] at his expense. 

The former vice president's 20-room home and pool house devoured nearly 221, 000 kilowatt-hours in 2006, more than 20 times the national average of 10, 656 kilowatt-hours. This, of course, is why he wants you to conserve electricity. He wants it all for himself.

Al Gore increases global temperature 5 degrees every time he takes his shirt off. Mmmm....oh yes, and he flies around everywhere in his own private jet which contradicts his whole global warming scheme.

=== World Domination ===

# Create the Internets
# Invent Global Warming
# [[????]]
# PROFIT!!!

=Quotations=

* "1000101, [[lol]]."
* "[[BRB]] bio break."
* "[[How do I shot web]]?"
* "Ask not what [[Mudkipz]] can do for your country, ask what [[Mudkipz]] can do for you."

=Al Gore and Science=
Al Gore was awarded a Nobel Prize for making his power point presentation, "An Inconvenient [[Lie|Truth]]".  He used his "scientific background" to make this film.  Al has a Bachelor of the Arts degree in Government and he took a class on [[Computer Science III|climate science]] in college.  This puts his movie at about the same level as a Junior High science fair project. 

[[Shit Nobody Cares About|We need to save the planet. Carbon Dioxide is killing us. Polar bears are dying.]].

Al Gore claims that he is inventor of the the [[internet]]. Although it is also reported that the internet was born in 1970, via immaculate conception through Al Gore's gaping [[man-gina]]. This is a more likely scenario, as it is common knowledge that anyone can follow their land line to the their Isp trunk. Effectively, all trunks are linked up to a giant [[Belkin]] router located inside Al Gore's man-gina. The internet is a series of tubes, and goes where ever Al Gore roams. 

===Al Gore Knows Him Some Words===
[[Image:Chubby gore.jpg|thumb|Mr. Gore after consuming said helpless child]]
[[Image:MANBEARPIG.jpg|thumb|right|Al Gore is the original [[furry]] hunter. I'm totally cereal (not serial, retards.)]]
[[Image:IRLsasquatch.JPG|right|thumb|Manbearpig IRL ]]

[[Image:Gorehighfive.jpg|thumb|right|Gore gives himself a high five after winning first prize in the Miss World contest]]
[[Image:reverend lovejoy 2.jpg|thumb|Gore is a frequent guest on the [[Simpsons]] (although [http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Reverend_Timothy_Lovejoy&diff=115576577&oldid=114467550 "Scorpion0422" ignores this fact]).]]More quotes from the master of the internet and the environment.  These are all true. '''''[[PROTIP]]:''''' Bringing up any of these quotes to a Gore fanatic will yield the famous "taken out of context" argument so many assholes like to use when they're getting pwnd in an argument.  In short, Al Gore is a professional at pwning himself.  Smirk inwardly, for you have won at this point.

{{frame|{{morphquote|mqtest4|background-color: white; width: 600px; height: 300px;|font-weight: bold;
|“If we don’t succeed, we run the risk of [[fail|failure]].”| –Al Gore
|“Democrats understand the importance of [[BDSM|bondage]] [[incest|between a mother and child]].”| - Vice President Al Gore
|“Welcome to President Clinton, Mrs. Clinton, and my fellow astronauts.”| – Vice President Al Gore
|“Mars is essentially in the same orbit… Mars is somewhat the same distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, & water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe.”| – Vice President Al Gore, 8/11/94

|“The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation’s history. I mean in this century’s history. But we all lived in this century. I didn’t live in this century.”| — Vice President Al Gore, 9/15/95

|“I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change.”| – Vice President Al Gore, 5/22/98
|“One word sums up probably the responsibility of any vice president, & that one word is ‘to be prepared’.”| – Vice President Al Gore, 12/6/93
|“Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things.”| – Vice President Al Gore, 11/30/96
|“I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future.”| - Vice President Al Gore
|“The future will be better tomorrow.”| - Vice President Al Gore
|“We’re going to have the best-educated American people in the world.”| – Vice President Al Gore, 9/21/97
|“People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and have a tremendous impact on history.”| — Vice President Al Gore
|“I stand by all the misstatements that I’ve made.”| – Vice President Al Gore to Sam Donaldson, 8/17/93
|“We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe.”| — Vice President Al Gore
|“Public speaking is very easy.”| - Vice President Al Gore to reporters in 10/95
|“I am not part of the problem. I am a Democrat.”| – Vice President Al Gore
|“A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.”| — Vice President Al Gore
|“When I have been asked who caused the riots and the killing in L.A., my answer has been direct & simple: Who is to blame for the riots? The rioters are to blame. Who is to blame for the killings? The killers are to blame."| – Al Gore
|“Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having it.”| – Vice President Al Gore, 5/20/96
|“We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur.”| — Vice President Al Gore, 9/22/97
|“For NASA, space is still a high priority.”| – Vice President Al Gore, 9/5/93
|“Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children.”| – Vice President Al Gore, 9/18/95
|“The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that Al Gore may or may not make.”| – Vice President Al Gore
|“We’re all capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on the mistakes we may or may not have made.”| - Vice President Al Gore
|“It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment. It’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.”| — Vice President Al Gore
|“[It’s] time for the human race to enter the solar system.”| — Vice President Al Gore
|“As many of you know, I was very instrumental in the founding of the Internet”| – Al Gore to Katie Couric 3/99
|“After extensive research it is safe to say 1.21 jiggawatts is not enough to time travel”| - Al Gore 13/99
|“The internet is not some tangible object for people to hack and poke jokes, I would know, after all, I created it”| - Al Gore 12/31/00}}|color=blue}}

[[Some argue]] that most of these are just [[Dan Quayle]] quotes with the names changed, but [[nobody gives a shit]].

=Media=
===Gallery===
{{cg|Goreophobia Scrapbook|AlGoreGallery|center|<gallery>
Image:Darklordgore.jpg|The Dark Lord
Image:Goresmug.jpg|Gore rolling in his own smugness
Image:Goreworld.jpg|Gore shows how he can save the Earth with his bare hands
Image:Gorefan.jpg|One of Gore's groupies
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:Gorepower.jpg|Gore casts a spell over his Earth children
Image:Tibia Manbearpig.jpg|Female version of the Manbearpig
Image:Al Gore energyball.jpg|Gore making an energy ball using the soul of a child
Image:Gore Shoop.jpg|Gore only hours after the blessed event of motherhood.
Image:Lolgore.jpg|Bucket Gore.
Image:Al Gore Captain Planet.jpg|By your powers combined, I am...
Image:Gore killed Heston.JPG|Recently, Gore totally [[pwnd]] Charlton Heston for the [[lulz]].
Image:Al_Gore_FGSFDS.jpg
</gallery>}}

===Videos===
<youtube>IJ_XveGMdEY</youtube>

=Related Articles & Links=
===See Also ===
*[[Environmentalism]]
*[[Greenpeace]]
*[[Global Warming]]
*[[Bill Clinton]]
*[[South Park]]
*[[Internets]]
*[[Serious Cat|Cereal Cat]]
*[[Serious Business|Cereal Business]]
*[[Climategate]]

=== Links ===
*[http://learning.cc.hccs.edu/Members/cschweitzer/images/angryal.jpg Angry Al Gore]
*[http://www.manbearpig.net Official Manbearpig Web Site]
*[http://www.thinkgene.com/scientists-successfully-create-human-bear-pig-chimera Scientists successfully create human-bear-pig chimera (for real!)]
[[Category:People|Gore, Al]]
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{{Timeline|Featured article August 10, [[2008]]|[[404 Girl]]|[[{{PAGENAME}}]]|[[Chris-chan]]}}

[[Category:People|Gore, Al]]