View source for Drug

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[[Image:Stash3.jpg|center|400px]]
<br>
[[Image:Holyshittrippinballsawesome.gif|frame|Drugs are pretty [[awesome]].]]
[[Image:Holy shit im tripping balls.jpg|thumb|Like wow, man.]]
[[Image:Wtf201.jpg|thumb|This makes sense when you are on drugs.]]
[[Image:Antidrugbooty.jpg|thumb|It's even better on drugs]]
[[Image:Real_mario_close.jpg‎|thumb|This is why you never do Meth.]]
[[Image:Coke for kids.gif|thumb|These were popular among kids [[no more than 99]] years ago.]]
[[Image:michaelkbrandow.jpg|thumb|[[Lie|This man is definitely not on drugs.]]]]

According to a very [[bullshit|reliable]] [[TOW|source]], a '''drug''' is any chemical substance which changes the [[normal]] function of the [[human]] body. While [[Truth|drugs are used by nearly everyone]] and being high is a hoot and a holler, the discussion of drugs is the source of much [[drama]] on the [[Interbutts]].

The drama generally starts with drug users who [[Spam|post while high]], and [[whine]] endlessly about [[Shit nobody cares about|the legalization and decriminalization]] of [[Jenkem|their drug of choice]]. Their reasons range from the general [[truth|harmlessness]] of being stoned to their beliefs that tripping balls provides [[batshit crazy|legitimate cognitive benefits]], as opposed to simply [[truth|being fun]]. These morons generally piss off the rest of the druggie community (the ones with functional nervous systems, at least) by making them all look like ignorant burn-outs.

On the opposite end of the spectrum are those who [[Anti-lulz|hate drugs]]; these types claim to not see [[fun|the point]] of taking a drug, regardless of it being harmful or not and regardless of the fact they they most likely chain-smoke and are alcoholic, coffee addicts, who chronically [[masturbate]] to their child [[porn]]. Despite the glaring hypocrisy, these upstanding citizens are too burnt out from their mentally onerous worship of social fascism to even acknowledge their own cognitive dissonance. Dr. Park N. Stones has studied this phenomenon and claims that these people are either lamers, [[larpers]], [[underage B&]]s, [[troll]]s, [[fundies]], [[straight edge]]rs, or people that took Reefer Madness way too seriously. Particularly in the United States the [[Christians]] fear that if people, especially children, started to do drugs then they would turn away from [[bullshit|religion]] and there simply would not be enough adolescent semen for their [[idiot|Evangelical]] overlords to guzzle. Furthermore, the subset of these [[morons|geniuses]] that are not trolling are the same people responsible for the [[war on drugs]] as well as the genocide in [[Darfur]].

A special mention should be given to sXer's, who tend to view themselves as analogues of John Wayne and therefore TOO independent and self-sustaining to ever rely on chemicals, you weakling. A MAN IS NOT AN ISLAND. Channeling the snide countenance of Vegeta and acting like they have reached the height of Darwinian perfection, they walk stolidly into their giant parties of disaffected whiny youth DRUG-FREE. To these folks, drugs are an anathema. On the other hand, insidious bitching about a harmless toker or wishing genuine violence on a contrived archenemy alliance of potsmokers/rapists/atheists is considered a healthy social activity.

==Drugs &rarr; Creativity &rarr; WIN==
<center>'''When [[azn|Azns]] take drugs'''</center>
<center> <youtube>yaKcTfE3Bso</youtube></center>
Just ask William Burroughs, [[Cyberpunk|Philip K Dick]], and every other writer worth a damn. Drugs, be they good or bad, cause you to think outside the box and thus be [[creative]]. Because you're so fucked out of your head you won't rip off other people's ideas and with the right ego-enhancing compounds, you will have enough self-belief to pull off that great novel that everyone's got inside them. S'true!  Everything's ripped off of everyone. Nothing is truly original anymore. Just look at [[tvtropes]], which could be considered a drug itself.

Looking to be a writer/musician (to write lyrics hurr durr)? Try these drugs until you find one that works for you!
#'''[[Alcohol]]''' - Stands the test of time, no justification necessary.
#*''Users:'' "The Lost Generation", including Hemingway, Faulkner, and Fitzgerald, and every [[funny]] [[comedian]].
#'''[[Opioids#Heroin|Heroin]]''' - Find out what it means to be [[Dextromethorphan|truly detached]] from everything!
#*''Users:'' Ray Charles, Lou Reed, Charlie Parker, every rock star/jazz musician ever. [[Straight Edge|sXe doesn't count]] because emo music sucks anyway. 
#'''[[Amphetamines]]''' - Churn out ideas as rapidly as possible; statistically speaking, you'll eventually write something good. 
#*''Users:'' Lemmy from Motörhead, The Beatles. [[Wikipedia:The Beatles in Hamburg|No, seriously]]. And apparently [[Britney Spears]]. 
#'''[[Weed]]''' - If you reach this point you probably weren't meant to be a writer, you'll either be inspired or hungry...
#*''Users:'' All the [[cooldude|cool kids]]; every [[Fat Larry's Band|musician]] (AKA John Mayer), [[artist]] and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED]] user
#'''[[LSD]]''' - You'll trip balls (read: hallucinate you're [[Shadow|talking to your dead dog's disembodied head]]) and be able to, like, totally ''feel'' music. [[O RLY|Ya rly]]. You'll literally feel, taste, smell, and/or see music. [[Wikipedia:Synesthesia|Synesthesia]] FTW! Think Dazzler from X-Men. You might also become the internets.
#*''Users:'' Every goddamn pop culture icon from the '60s and early '70s. [[Hippies]], [[psychiatrist]]s, musicians, the [[CIA]], mad [[scientist]]s and more.
#'''[[Salvia]]''' - Basically LSD lite, but without the cool synesthesia and lasts for only 5 minutes.
#*''Users:'' Rich kids on Spring Break in Ocean City looking to "rebel" against their rich white parents.
#'''[[Shrooms]]''' - An organic LSD, if you will.  Allows you to experience the novel sensation of tiny fungi grabbing a hold of your brain's receptors and small aliens pulling the switches and levers known as synapses, seemingly at random.  Far more likely to cause a psychotic break or a de-railing of the psyche than LSD (well, if the fungus is any -GOOD-).  Most of the fun feelings and hallucinations of LSD in a "healthy", organic sense.  After-effects are no more severe than your average body poisoning and accompanied by feelings of extreme relief (I ALMOST DIED MAN) and/or a falsely inflated ego and delusions of being God/the creator of the universe.
#*''Users:'' Used by magical dwarves as a cash crop, by Northern [[Israel]]i psychedelic-trance bands of the infected vareity, and by '''Neil Patrick Harris''' as an appetizer.
#'''[[DMT]]''' - Dimethyltryptamine.  This is like the final boss of hallucinogenic drugs.  If you've ever wanted to hurdle through a kaleidoscopic gateway into 10th dimensional hyperspace whilst talking to Buddha, space-faring bees, aliens, Jesus, and super-intelligent basketballs, all in the timespan of 15 minutes, this is your dope.  
#*''Users:''  Technically everyone, but especially Amazonian shamans shitting themselves in tents and grimy teenagers at music festivals shitting themselves in tents.
#'''[[Oil#Gasoline|Gasoline]]''' - If you think you're moderately hip like me, you might have gone your whole life in America and never know the awesome mind-numbing properties of ordinary gasoline.  Only though the awesome educational power of Encyclopedia Dramatica did I learn that Australian Aboriginals have harnessed the enourmous dreamtime-inducing potential of this everyday substance!  And you thought they were duffucks.
#*''Users:''  Australian aboriginals and doubtless a few other people at the thick end of the wedge in the drug culture-war.  Usually it's inhaled, but try smoking it for a special experience.
#*''Legality:''  As part of Australia's [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Opal_fuel war on petrol], gasoline will soon be illegal.  ''(what do you expect from a country that bans ED?)''  This is not actually expected to reduce the use, but it gives them a great excuse to give taxpayer money to BP in exchange for them taking the trouble to establish a monopoly on sales of a special gasoline substitute.  ''(I'm not making this up...)''
#'''[[Pussy]]''' - Probably the most costly and mania-inducing drug known to mankind. Pussy will make a man do things no crackhead or LSD shitface would dream of doing in 1 million drug induced years. Pussy in it's natural state is wet, furry, and smells slightly of dead fish. Be warned, if you buy some bad pussy, you could end up with [[aids|aids]].
#'''[[Penis]]''' - Only used by females. Males who do penis are looked down from their peers considering them a disgrace to society unless other male penis users are present. An extremely cheap drug that populates 99.8% of the earth; the other 2% are pussy and tits. Known to cause high libido and an intense euphoria. Can be inhaled or put into any orifice of the female anatomy. Like all drugs, penises come in different sizes, taste, prices, and colors. If constantly abusing this drug, you will end up with AIDS and various kinds of viruses, diseases, or both.

== Why Drugs Are [[Good]] ==

[[Image:3y3kklt.jpg|thumb|Drugs [[Paris Hilton|are hot]].]]
[[File:Ninjette_senior.png|thumb|That [[ICP|Wicked]] Puff!]]
It r a common known fact that drugs are mostly good for social settings. They can make men and women alike easy to sleep with, and they tend to have no problem blowing hundreds of thousands of hours of your life away (which judging by the fact that you're reading this, you would be doing anyway). You didn't really need them anyway. Drugs are great for laying back and not doing anything, which is great if you're in high school and won't be passing anyway, or if you plan on dropping out of college anyway because your life is really meaningless otherwise. Drugs are also good for making your shitty day great (while you're on them anyway), and they take the pain away from very minuscule happenings, such as losing your omg bf u datd so llong :( (Or [[PTSD]] but you're not in the [[Army]] and you never will be, little bitch.) 

Drugs also make you think you're funnier than you really are, or more talented. Which is great when you're the only one in the room on drugs. While the crowd won't agree, you're the [[Fat Larry's Band|greatest guitarist]] or the most [[masturbation|masterful debater]] in the room around you.

[[Pussy|Less potent]] substances, such as marijuana and alcohol, are common among many [[Dumbfuck|average]] [[Americans]], most notably [[College|youths]]. Recreational drugs, much like having [[Virgin|sex]] or driving their parent's car fast, liberate [[You|kids]] from [[Parents|social constraints]] and let peers know that they're [[White|fun, cool, and down]]. In reality, everyone but [[Loser|you]] has smoked weed.

So go ahead: there really is no reason NOT to take drugs. Unless you're Michael Phelps and some [[douchebag]] is there with a camera.

'''[[PROTIP]]''': If you edit while under the influence, make sure to use the preview button before saving. This can save your username from having a string of edits in the article history of [[Roman Showers]] or other sick shit that you are expert in, you [[sick fuck]].

==Real drugs==
*[[Absinthe]]
*[[Alcohol]]
*[[Amphetamines|Meth, Ritalin and Speed]]
*[[Bananadine]]
*[[Benadryl|Benadryl and Dramamine]]
*[[Benzos|Benzos (Xanax, Valium, etc)]]
*[[Caffeine]]
*[[South_Park|Cat pee]]
*[[Cocaine|Coke and crack]]
*[[Dextromethorphan|Cough syrup (DXM, robo)]]
*[[Datura|Datura and Belladonna]]
*[[DMT|DMT, 5-MeO-DMT, and toad licking]]
*[[Ecstasy|Ecstasy (MDMA)]]
*[[Jenkem]]
*[[LSD]]
*[[Nutmeg]]
*[[Opioids|Heroin, Oxycodone, Vicodin, Codeine, and more!]]
*[[PCP]]
*[[Peyote]]
*[[Salvia]]
*[[Shrooms]]
*[[Special K]]
*[[House|Vicodin]]
*[[Weed|Weed, marijuana, ganja, mary jane, green, chronic, devil's lettuce, sticky icky, etc.]]
*[[Inhalants|Whippets and other stuff you huff]]

==Fake drugs==
===Melange or Spice===
[[Image:Dune-cat.jpg|thumb|Delicious spice]]
This drug makes you live longer, endows you with psychic abilities, and increases the size of your penis. Oh, and mutate you into a large [[cock|worm]] or [[man the harpoons|space whale]]. It tastes like cinnamon, [[Jesus]]' boomstick, and those crazy Bene Gesserit bitches use it like crazy. It's made of sand worm [[crap]], costs a hella' lot and is only available on the desert planet of Arrakis, also known as [[science fiction|Dune]]. If you use it, make sure you use Visine so that your mom won't bust you for having glowing blue eyes.   A more powerful derivative of Spice is the Water of Life, which is refined Sand Worm Piss, and can only be safely consumed by the one who is foretold in prophecy and if you are expect one hell of a trip. It also makes dumping the body of [[Osama Bin Laden]] into the sea with all your [[faggot]] prancing navy sailor friends a more enjoyable experience, [http://www.reuters.com/article/2011/10/20/us-sailors-discharged-drugs-idUSTRE79J8XA20111020 IN THE NAVYYYY]

Do not confuse genuine spice with the knockoff "Spice". This fake Spice is the synthetic cannabinoid JWH-018 and is a perfectly legal "drug" in most European countries. Fake Spice is fairly cheap as it's made out of shit herbs like [[lol|marshmallows]] (sic!) and flowers and easy to order thanks to the magic of the internetz. It's effects include uncool shit like drooling and that intense burning feeling in your throat/lungs. If you can smoke enough without your lungs falling out, Side effects may include smells of turqoise, sounds of green and some memorable hardcore anal pain after being lovingly [[sodomized]].

===Adrenochrome===
Adrenachrome is a form of oxidized adrenaline that is difficult to make, impossible to obtain and that [http://www.erowid.org/chemicals/adrenochrome/adrenochrome_info1.shtml just might make you trip balls]. Its effects include: dysphoria, increased heart rate, increased respiration rate, increased blood pressure, increased chance of death, and just maybe ''[[psychotic]] hallucinations''. [[Some argue|Purportedly]], you feel as if you are right on the threshold of [[death]], having [[sex]] and being beaten senseless by [[asspies]], all at the same time.

According to famous [[scientist]] Hunter S. Thompson, using the drug will cause you to have no memory of what occurs while under its influence, so duct-taping a tape recorder or video camera to your chest would be advisable. If you're retarded enough to buy [[Advertisement|100% REAL ADRENOCHROME]] off your local drug dealer, your only two sensible options are to resell it to middle-schoolers or to admit that you paid $200 for some dried NyQuil cut with meth.

===Cake===
[[Image:Brasseyecake.jpg|thumb|David Amess & Noel Edmunds preach the dangers of "Cake".]]

"[[Cake]]" was created by legendary [[English]] troll, [[Chris Morris]], as part of his "Brass Eye" TV series (like the [[Colbert Report]], only better).  The episode in question, featured Morris posing as a journalist,then  interviewing celebrities regarding what they knew of "cake".  Once their [[Shameless_self_promotion|moral outrage]] had been suitably fired up, Morris gave them a set of ridiculous "anti-cake" messages to read on camera, which they happily did.   

{{squote|One young kiddie on cake cried all the water out of his body. Just imagine how his mother felt.| Bernard Manning knows that cake is [[serious_business|SRS BIZNS]]}}

The [[cunt|Tory]] [[politician]] David Amess M.P, was so fooled by this prank, he even brought the issue up in [[government|parliament]], bringing further [[lulz]], a transcript of the parliamentary hearing can be found [http://www.parliament.the-stationery-office.co.uk/pa/cm199596/cmhansrd/vo960723/text/60723w10.htm here.]  You those wanting to know more, you can see the clip [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WwylBRucU7w here]
 
In conclusion, [[you]] can be assured that the cake is a lie. You can also be assured the cake is a spy!

[[Bill Clinton]] tried it in college but didn't swallow... the first time.

===Catnip===
Catnip is what [[stoner]]s smoke when they are all out of weed, kief, resin and stems. It's best when you're all out of your dirty schwag weed, but it tastes like rotten [[vagina]] and burns the fuck out of your throat. But I mean c'mon!  Look how happy and shit that cat is, man!  That must be some good shit!

===UPN===
[[Image:Vancouver-drugs_1.jpg|thumb|The typical [[unemployed]] [[16 year old girl]] stoned off her ass]]

UPN, not to be confused with the [[television]] network for niggers, is short for ureaphenylnitrate, a potent yet quickly metabolized hallucinogen and stimulant. Its discovery is relatively recent (see various publications in the European Journal of Clinical Pharmacology), yet it is gaining [[OL]] notoriety in such [[LJ]] communities as {{ljcomm|stoner_girls}} and {{ljcomm|drugwar}}. Preparation is nearly trivial: The intended user accumulates approximately 1 liter of urine in a small Nalgene container (the source of the phenyl group via the naturally flaked bisphenol A); which is permitted to completely evaporate. The urea particles are resuspended in a small volume (< 5mL) of water, and another small (< 5g) amount of saltpeter is added. The resulting mixture contains a significant amount of UPN, so should be tested for specific effects using a Q-Tip on the edge of the nostril before either snorting or inserting directly into the [[anus]] for maximum effect. 
While certainly not addressed in the reputable publications, it is speculated that the discovery of this drug should be attributed to the esoteric S&M [[babyfur]]s, who discovered the drug during a noble journey of self-awareness involving piss, cutting, and explosives, during some kind of hiking adventure, which makes absolutely no fucking sense, because babyfurs are justifiably afraid of the sun (it is their pervert god that judges them).

Detailed instructions can be found here ([http://www.google.com/search?client=safari&rls=en&q=urea+nitrate+explosions&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8m 100WaysToGetHigh]) or see [[Party Van]]

===[[Alternative Medicine]]===
<small>For a full breakdown see [[Alternative Medicine|this page]]</small>

Alternative medicine is like real medicine, but instead of containing drugs it contains [[lies]]. If you find out you have two months to live, don't spend your time and money doing anything listed above, waste it on alternative treatments. It's exactly as effective as a placebo, particularly expensive, and you've got to give your money to a scam artist masquerading as a hippie.

There are a wide variety of alternative or 'complementary' medicines and they're all as retarded as the last. They're a bit like [[Darwin Awards]] in that they make stupid people die quickly.

Heroin 
Shoot this up and have some FUN


===[[Jenkem]]===

Jenkem is a very rough high that first consists of wanting to kill yourself intensely followed by a very long period of total body numbness. It is a very strong body high that lasts approximately 7 hours. On the down, you just kinda feel like your regaining consciousness after being dead for years. If you have sex on this drug, you will die, then spontaneously implode. This drug is made by pissing and shitting into a plastic container whereupon you must be able to stretch a plastic balloon (standard size!) over the top. Wait approximately 7 to 9 days, to allow for fermentation and shit,where the balloon will fill up with a truly noxious gas. This gas is then to be inhaled though the nostrils. While on this high, it is recomended to find yourself a filthy homosexual and curb stomp him to death.

===Medipacks/Healthpacks/Stimpacks===
[[Image:Stimpack.gif|thumb|125px|[[Starcraft|10 hp, but ohh so delicious. "Tsst, Ahh, Thats the stuff."]]]]
Medipacks are highly [[addict|addictive]], take away 10hp, and you never have enough of them. You'd [[KILL_IT_WITH_FIRE|kill]] entire [[Alien|alien]] [[army|armies]], suck leprous [[cock|cocks]] or [[srsly]] [[John_Locke|fuck it up]] with [[something awful|demons from hell]], just to get your [[Mr._Hands|hands]] on you next "Pack". How they work actually [[noone]] knows, but as far as modern science can say, you have to WALK OVER THEM. Maybe the most dangerous thing about Medipacks is, that you can use them while having both hands occupied, for example while killing aliens or [[Fap|fapping]] while [[goatse|goatseing]] your [[anus]]. Somehow makes guns shoot faster.

===[[I-Dosing|Idoser]]===
[[Image:Idoser.jpg|thumb|The best thing since [[W|Bush]] was kicked off the presidential pedestal.]]
{{squote|'''Idoser''' is this shit that is FUCKING AWESOME.It sends sound beats through your brain and you actually get the effects of the drug you choose (not to mention it has every illegal and legal drug out there).IT'S ALSO FREE!!!! You don't have to bother with trying to save up a shitload of cash just for a little bit of drugs, GET IDOSER AND BE PREPARED TO HAVE THE RIDE OF YOUR FUCKING LIFE!| [[13 year old boy|a 13 year old boy]]}}

Note: Idoser is total bullshit, unless already tr0pn bawlz.

Note: it may be complete shit, but it'll kill some time.

==Drugs and [[Wikipedia]]==
[[Image:Winnerdrugs.jpg|thumb|BRB FBI]]
For first time users who are unsure of the correct methods to inject drugs, Wikipedia is very well versed in the subject. Their article on [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Drug_injection drug injection] details the many ways to insert illicit drugs into one's body. For example, did you know that women are able to insert drugs into their vagina with much the same effect as a suppository? You do now! Thanks to [[Wikipedia]]!

==Drugs That Don't Have Articles Yet==

===2C-B/2C-E/2C-I/2-C-T-7/2C-Whatever===
Psychedelic research chemicals that burn like the unholy bowels of [[Hell]] when snorted up the nose and also taste like rotten [[Indian]] food, paint thinner, and year-old [[jenkem]].  For best results, stick them up your [[pooper]] (no, really).  For a while, these chemicals were used legally at [[rave]]s instead of the illegal [[ecstasy]], but, like all good things, the [[government|vast right-wing conspiracy]] eventually criminalized them as well.  Drugs like these research chemicals have interesting side effects that have been recorded.  In addition to [[http://weirdnews.aol.com/2011/05/03/man-sexually-assaults-pygmy-goat_n_856985.html#s288823&title=Dumb_Crime_Masterminds| raping and killing your neighbors goat], the growth of dreadlocks, attendance at burning man, and having ugly [[hippie]] girlfriends is often a direct side effect of the use of these and similar drugs.  Furthermore, you may listen to repetitive dubsteb with awful repeating robot sounds, and other forms of [[psytrance|horrible sounds which may or may not pass as music ]].  If you become heavily addicted, as most people who use these horrible substances do, you may find yourself thinking you know something about the nature of [[Carl Sagan|GOD]], thinking anyone gives a shit about your [[bullshit|deep thoughts]], and posting your [[Shit no one cares about|experiences]] on [[420chan|420chan's /psy/ board.]]

[[File:FeedingYourOwnFaceToTheDogs.jpg|thumb|right| 400px| This is why you shouldn`t do drugs kiddies...seriously show this pic to [[Noobs| kindergartens]] in your next [[Anti-lulz| Anti-Drug]] Campaign to [[Troll|benefically educate]] them!]] 

===AMT===
Compare to above.  AMT has a similar legal history, but different effects.  Basically, you'd be better off taking 4 ecstasy pills, eating a bag of shrooms, dropping 5 tabs of acid, snorting, smoking two joints laced with PCP, and watching a horror movie about killer cops.

===Amphetamines===
Amphetamine is best done daily as it makes you lose weight and eventually start to see weird shit, which is cool as fuck. Retarded kids take it for ADD or something. It takes away the ability to shut the fuck up and removes the need for sleep until it wears off, at which point you will want to kill yourself.

===Barbituates===
Downers have been known to make one second last 3 hours and make going to the bathroom an ordeal.  You know those retarded commercials where "pot" users are fading into the couch?  Well, obviously, that's bullshit.  Pot won't make you fade into the couch.  But downers will.

===BZP===
A designer drug that was eventually made illegal along with TFMPP.  Legal does not mean weak, however.  These things are like fucking meth pills.  And, best of all, you'll feel like [[shit]] coming down from it.

===Cathinone and Methcathinone===
White powder that will make you feel like [[Jesus]]' son for 10 minutes.  Then you'll wake up and realize that you're the same [[loser]] you were before you snorted it.

===Chloroform===
As a simple, effective way to [[rape|knock someone out]], chloroform stands the test of time.  Just put some on a rag, walk up to that [[whore]], and ask her if your rag smells funny.  [[????]]  [[PROFIT!]]

===DiPT===
The psychedelic drug for blind people.  It will make your hearing so fucked up, you'll think you're [[crazy|schizophrenic]].  An audio trip.

===DOB/DOC/DOM/DOI/DO-Whatever===
Super-acid that often lasts over 24 hours.  If your "acid" trip lasts a day and a half, you were sold DOB.

===DPT===
A psychedelic known for being used as the Eucharist of the Temple of the True Inner Light, which worships psychedelics as the "Flesh of God".  And the government lets them.  "Separation of Church and state" my ass.

===Ephedrine and Pseudoephedrine===
A stimulant that is technically still legal, so grab it up before those [[police|pigs]] take it from you.

===Ether===
Some kind of chemical that was used as an alcohol replacement during Prohibition.  May be mixed with alcoholic drinks, but why the fuck anyone would want to do that is beyond human comprehension.

===Herbal Ecstasy===
Similar to synthetic weed.  This is for [[pussies]] who can't get real ecstasy.  Also, the effects ARE NOTHING LIKE ECSTASY AT ALL.

===Foxy===
Hyper-ecstasy that will cause you to spasm on the floor and have sex with glow sticks.  Yet another drug that was used as a legal ecstasy replacement and sold on the [[Internet]] until the [[government]] outlawed it in 2003.

===GHB===
May be used as a club drug or [[rape|slipped into someone's drink]].  Usually the latter. <b>PROTIP:</b> Good for raping if you don't want to get caught.

===Kava Kava===
If you eat enough of this godawful [[shit|brown stuff]], you will be rewarded with nausea and depression.  AND IT REALLY WORKS, TOO!

===Khat===
Chewed by Somalians for years, khat contains cathinone and tastes worse than [[vomit]] mixed with charcoal and gasoline.  Causes mania and delusions (but [[you]] don't need a drug for that, now, do you?)

===Krocodil===
Krocodil is a drug made in soviet [[russia]] that [[OM NOM NOM NOM|EATS YOUR FUCKING SKIN]].[http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/europe/krokodil-the-drug-that-eats-junkies-2300787.html] Flesh goes grey and peels away to leave bones exposed. But [[you|your'e]] bored, so why not give it a whirl. [[zombie|What's the worst that could happen?]]

===LSA===

Soft-core version of LSD; kind of a [[fail|natural]] version, the high is not as intense. Fail. Used only by teenagers [[trying too hard|trying to look cool]], [[Newgrounds]] users, and [[You]]

===MDA===
A more psychedelic ecstasy.

===MDAI===
Pretty much the same as below, but legal.  May be found on the [[interwebs]].

===MDE===
A less stimulating, more [[pussy]] ecstasy.

===Qualuudes===
Used by [[everyone]] (especially college kids and [[your mom]]) during the 1970s, these have virtually faded into oblivion since they stopped being manufactured in 1983.  Some sweaty [[Mexicans]] can still get you some illegally-made Qualuudes if you know [[ghetto|where to look]], however.

===Nitrous Oxide===
Laughing gas that [[hippies]] steal from dentists' office and use like fucking crack.  [[Fellatio|Sucking]] on nitrous-filled balloons while listening to [[The Grateful Dead]] is a true sign of being a hippie.  Whipped cream chargers contain nitrous and may be used by [[13 year old boys]] who don't know [[ghetto|where to find]] other drugs or [[Mexicans|who to get them from]].  Often called "hippie crack" because of the way these canisters fill up VW buses outside of Phish concerts, Nitrous is incredibly psychically addictive, and hippies have been known to find jobs, vote republican, and listen to music that doesn't suck just so they can get their fix.

===MXE/MKet/Methoxetamine===
A drug invented [[last thursday]] that is 'kinda like ketamine.'  Was designed when wannabe [[hippies]] and [[ravers]] grew a bit older and decided that raiding the local pharmacy for robitussin highs was too [[13 year old boy|middle school]], but couldn't get real [[Ketamine]].  Has only been around for a short time yet has caused massive lulz because every [[fucktard]] who orders it assumes it's [[fact|JUST LIKE THE REAL THING]], prepares a "K hole" sized dose, and ends their night attempting to eat a table or [[beastiality|bone the dog]].  [[Protip]]: since MXE is cheap and available on the internet, it is completely safe and non-addictive, so you must consume as much as possible.  [[bullshit|Any negative side effects or cravings are entirely in your head!]]  '''This drug is actually completely legal in the USA because Ketamine is schedule 3 meaning the analog act doesn't apply.''' (no, really)

===PMA===
The worst drug ever.  Taking even a [[penis|tiny]] amount will cause you to spaz out, overheat, and die.  May be mixed with ecstasy for especially [[death|lethal]] fun.

===Poppers===
'''Poppers''' (also known as '''the [[goatse]] drug''') is used exclusively by [[gay]] faggots during episodes of partying and playing (PNP) who want to be able to fit huge cocks in their [[ass]]. All you have to do is pop off the cap, sniff the aromatic contents of the bottle, and your anus will [[goatse|magically expand]] and be able to stretch to lengths never before thought possible! This is accompanied by a brief high (a minute or two) and increased libido and [[orgasm potency]] so you and your gay friends can have a massive gay orgy together!  Poppers, sold in porn shops, usually are administered using a cloth soaked in the bottle's aromatic contents and then inhaled.  Spilling the bottle is embarrassing and smelly and irritates the skin.  Poppers are often part of the PNP practice, used conjunctively with amphetamines and ecstasy-type chemicals with one drug enhancing the other.  Persons on viagra to overcome the erectile dysfunction (e.g. crystal dick) that sometimes occurs need to avoid poppers.  They can cause a sudden drop in blood pressure that can be fatal if taken to extremes.  Viagra + amphetamines + Poppers = a real black out.  

Known users of this drug:
*[[Freddie Mercury|George Michael]]
*[[Your dad]]
*[[Faggot|Hyper-faggots]]
*[[You]]

===Steroids===
Used by every athlete alive.  These will cause rapid muscle growth as well as facial hair on women, [[tits]] on men (no, not the kind you already have), shrunken testicles, and [[rage|flipping the fuck out]].

===Synthetic Weed (Spice, K2, ect.)===
Government weed that is made from a variety of spices and chemicals. Stronger than regular weed as well meaning one or two puffs from this shit is enough to get you stoned. Exceeding more puffs than needed either leads to a nasty paranoid trip to the point you think you're in hell, being in a hospital room, or death. It's recommended that you smoke regular weed instead.

===TFMPP===
Similar to BZP.  Jesus powder that only lasts for a short period of time before you feel like you just got run over by a [[you|30,000-pound]] steamroller.

===Yohimbine===
May be used as a stimulant, but is usually sold as an aphrodisiac for [[you|lonely old men who can't get an erection]].

==High Scores==
[[Image:Winehouse.jpg|thumb|Holy crack binge, Batman]]
*[[The Netherlands|Amsterdam]]
*[[Heath Ledger]]
*[[Ripper]]
*[[L. Ron Hubbard]]
*[[DXM|DXM Ben]]
*[[Hunter S. Thompson]]
*[[Amy Winehouse]]
*[[Michael Jackson]]
*[[Joseph Evers]]
*[[House]]
*[[Rick James]]
*[[W]]
*[[Britney Spears]]
*[[Anna Nicole Smith]]
*[[Pete Doherty]]
*[[Barack Obama]]
*[[An Heroine|Stephanie Michelle Brown]]
*[[You]]
*[[retard|derp]]

==Gallery==
{{cg||chatroulettegallery|center|<gallery>
Image:LSD-FLESH-OF-DEVIL.jpg|Hmmmm, tell me more about this '''L'''<u> </u>'''S'''<u> </u>'''D'''
Image:Chickenpotpie.jpg|Dogs love it, too.
Image:2vvmmbo.jpg|oh my
Image:Claudia_thorn_gets_fucked.JPG|Claudia Thorn works hard to support her meth habit.
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:1241252978910.jpg|There's a reason some shrooms taste like ass
Image:N64bong.jpg|The newest Wii accessory
Image:2rddfgl.jpg|Fact: Nicole Richie licks her coke.
Image:Chris Crocker Is A Crazy Faggot.gif|[[Chris Crocker|Faggy McBAWWW]] getting high before making the infamous Leave Britney Alone video.
Image:Cokehayfever.jpg|Cocaine is a well-known remedy for hay fever
Image:FaceMelt.gif|Don't take the brown acid, man.
Image:YOUonPCP.jpg|This is a black person
Image:Chipmunk Pipe.jpg|DO NOT sort the chipmunk out! He is a fucking freeloader
Image:Drugsmoarplz.jpg|enough said.
Image:Jugocannbis.jpg|Now in convenient 40-ounce bottles
Image:Cocaine yummy.jpg|Remedy for many ills
Image:Cigarettes.jpg|Smoking makes you look [[cool|COOL]]
Image:Crackpiperoses.jpg|[[series of tubes]]
Image:Chore boy.gif|don't forget this
Image:Bushit.jpg|[[W]] is a coke sniffin machine
Image:Lol drugs.gif|This is why you should do drugs.
Image:Egg.jpg|Typical brain on drugs. Order up!
Image:Fuck im high.jpg|Prolly the only way he can get through filming the show.
image:Junkie.jpg|Typical junkie
Image:Highcat.gif|I'm freaking out, man...
Image:Trippin Balls.gif|A religious experience
Image:Rockin-highcat.gif|I can SEE the music!
Image:Balls1.jpg|I think I took too much
Image:10-14wtf.gif|Drugs in a pinch
Image:Trippin BALLS.jpg
Image:Cokeheadreportingin.jpg|ED users like drugs.
Image:Blackpowder.jpeg|Why you shouldn't do drugs.
Image:Pokedad4.jpg|Gengar, giving free advice
Image:Cannabis.jpg
Image:Classy_White_Trash.jpg|Pot raises IQ by millions.
Image:White Trash Bong.jpg|Remember kids; Don't do drugs.
File:Epilepsynice.gif|What you see when you take drugs
File:Jerkcity1097.gif
</gallery>|}}

== See Also ==
<!-- Plz to be adding more: 
      PEOPLE (e.g. Michael Phelps), 
      COMMUNITIES AND WEBSITES (e.g. Erowid, 420chan) and 
      RELATED ARTICLES e.g. Hookers and blow -->
* [[Alcohol|Booze]]
* [[PCP]]
* [[Erowid]]
* [[420chan]]
* [[Grass City]]
* [[totse]]
* [[Hookers and blow]]
* [[Dying Alone]]
* [[LFG]]
* [[Jeff Hardy]]
* [[Brad McQuaid]]
* [[Michael Phelps]]
* [[Pickles]]
* [[Michael Jackson]]
* [[Billy Mays]]
* [[Alternative Medicine]]
* [[Rush Limbaugh]]

== External Links ==
* [http://www.fap-roulette.com/2010/01/hot-girls-420-godlike-internet-win.html Girls Gettin' High]
* {{youtube|1DUfxQcxK4k|Instructional Video on Selling Drugs}}
* [http://www.ljdrama.org/index.php?cat=3 Alcoholic drama on LJ]
* [http://www.ljdrama.org/index.php?cat=13 LJ Drug abuse stories]
* [http://www.iht.com/articles/2007/01/14/america/web.0113soldier.nytMAG.php?page=3 Brown-Brown] = cocaine mixed with gunpowde; snorted FTF.
* [http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1009471/shrooms/ Educational music video on shrooms]
* [http://www.montanameth.org 15 BUCKS FOR SEX ISN'T NORMAL] 
:::: '''[http://www.montanameth.org/ads/run/Sex.jpg BUT ON METH IT IS]'''

{{Drugs}}
{{politics}}
{{science}}
{{Timeline|Article of the Nao May 4, [[2011]]|[[Arabs]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Pope]]}}
[[Category:Drugs| ]]
[[Category:Abnormal Psych]]
[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]]
[[Category:Fandom Stuff]]