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Sara Ackerman is a student at NYU, whose liberal faggot loving professor, Dr. Zaloom, forced her to risk life and limb to interview degeneratesubhumans at the Occupy Wall Street protests. Little did Dr. Zaloom know, Sara is quite intelligent and well connected, and has decided to make this injustice public via Facebook.
This seven page email was sent to NYU staff, after Sara fought with them for months. Knowing that OWS is full of drug addicts, criminals, rapists, and crazy people, she wanted to stay far away. Even the alternative assignment, which involved interviewing police officers who dealt with OWS, meant dealing with dirty working class people. Negotiations apparently broke down before a third alternative assignment could be considered.
"Professor Caitlin Zaloom forced myself, and my classmates to do an ethnographic assignment on Occupy Wall Street a few months ago.
*No alternatives were offered, and we were instructed to interview only those people who were participating in the OWS movement– that means anyone, including criminals,drug addicts, mentally ill people, and of course, the few competent, mentally stable people that stationed themselves at Zuccotti Park
(**note: I did not meet any of the supposedly mentally sound, non-delusional people at Zucotti Park. All of the interviews that I conducted are on video, and clearly show that each person I interviewed—and believe me, for my own safety, I tried to interview the most seemingly normal people there—was either mentally disturbed or dangerous, scary or masked, or misogynistic and rude. I was cat- called at, gawked at, ogled, and called derogatory names.)"
„
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Although it went against my core values, moral beliefs, and also made me feel unsafe, I ultimately did go to Occupy Wall Street with my class group—–two other young girls, who are quite attractive and thin, and don’t look particularly physically fit enough to take on a potential predator, rapist, paranoid schizophrenic, etc.—-just to see if I was being as melodramatic as Professor Zaloom made me feel I was.
***I won’t go into detail here, but let me just tell you that if anything, I had previously underestimated how awful Occupy Wall Street was, and I left the park feeling as though I had escaped an extremely dangerous—and even, life-threatening—situation.***
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During Jen’s 2nd and 3rd lectures, she mostly refused to call on me, even when Iwas the only student raising my hand.
Other times, I kept my hand up for about 75 seconds—a long time to keep one’s arm raised, by the way —and Jen still did not call on me, or she dismissed my questions, thoughts, and opinions.
Furthermore, when Jen did call on me, she was incredibly hostile, rude, and condescending—she acted in a completely different manner than she had before,and she seemed to change her behavior only towards me.
„
“
Now would be a good time to step in---unless of course, you still think that I am bluffing about going to the press--remember, I know people--close family friends, in fact--who work for:
1.WSJ
2.The NY Observer
3.NYT
4.The Washington Post
I have already written the op-ed, and a draft has been approved by one of the reputable newspapers listed above.
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“
I have also cc'd Jen Heerwig---I don't particularly care about what she has to say,as taking on an immature grad student on a power-trip really doesn't fall high on my list of priorities.
However, I would like to remind you that I have 2 classmates who are willing to testify about Jen's discriminatory behavior that I have described above.
So Jen, please think carefully if you are questioned, as this may very well go to court.
„
“
Lastly, I have over 1,000 friends on facebook, and if Professor Zaloom does not resign, or is not fired by 9 am tomorrow morning, I will publish every single email exchange we have had, on my facebook account.
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Again though, because you have wasted so much of my vacation time, and impinged on my study time during finals week by not helping me, this still is not enough.
Starting right now, I will post a status regarding this situation on my facebook wall---I will not name any names, but after 9 am tomorrow, I will start naming people and I will publicize that Professor Zaloom was a spousal hire---
„
“
Again, because you wasted my time these last few weeks, and have also, in turn, forced me to extend the deadline for the op-ed to be published, I will have to make up for that 'publicity' in some other way---this will be via hourly facebook status updates, which will keep all identities of those involved anonymous until tomorrow, January 4, 2012, at 9:00am.
„
The Facebook
On Facebook, Sara begs for publicity for her cause. She also ponders the deeper things in life, such as why liberal dirtbags abandoned their hero, Anthony Weiner. She likes to post TL;DR shit, and never misses a chance to turn a conversation into a pissing match. For some reason, she's losing Facebook friends since this scandal broke. Just like always, it was a social experiment.
Spoiled Rich Kids at Blogspot provides screenshots for those without a Facebook.
“
I DON'T MEAN TO MAKE A CIRCUS OUT OF THIS VERY SERIOUS SITUATION, BUT CAN NO ONE ELSE SEE THE PARALLELS BETWEEN MY LIFE... AND THE HARRY POTTER SERIES.
"DID SOMEONE JUST CALL ME 'A CHUBBY MIDDLE-CLASS GIRL'??? NOW I'M PISSED"
"I WANT TO KNOW YOUR THOUGHTS, YOUR DREAMS, YOUR OPINIONS!" Sound Familiar?
"I LEAKED THIS TO PRESS---AN EMAIL IN WHICH I DEFEND JAMIE DIMON TO THAT BIGOT ZALOOM"
"I listen to at least one rap song, every single day now."
"It goes without saying that Zaloom is Voldermort"
Sara begs late night comedians for help.
Sara begs late night comedians for help.
Sara begs late night comedians for help.
Sara begs late night comedians for help.
Sara reveals the terrible truth about Zaloom.
Sara reveals the terrible truth about Zaloom.
TL;DR pissing match
TL;DR pissing match about North Korea
TL;DR pissing match about North Korea
TL;DR pissing match about North Korea
Sara is VERY SMART, don't forget it.
It's always a SOCIAL EXPERIMENT when you get defriended.
The internet's solution to Sara's problems.
It wouldn't be an internet drama without this.
Sara is not a conservative.
Sara is not crazy.
The way every internet drama ends: pretentious copypasta
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]
{{{5}}}
The Fallout
The school suspended Sara and her school email account. She posted several more TL;DR emails. 1 The public generally remains unappreciative of her harrowing almost raped experiences.
A thoughtless note from NYU staff
The truth about public education
"THOUGH SHE MAY HAVE A HIGH IQ (THIS HAS NOT YET BEEN CONFIRMED)"
Facebook blocked her from adding friends in her hour of need.
Comparing her cause to Anthony Weiner
"DID SOMEONE JUST CALL ME 'A CHUBBY MIDDLE-CLASS GIRL'??? NOW I'M PISSED"
"I WANT TO KNOW YOUR THOUGHTS, YOUR DREAMS, YOUR OPINIONS!" Sound Familiar?
"I LEAKED THIS TO PRESS---AN EMAIL IN WHICH I DEFEND JAMIE DIMON TO THAT BIGOT ZALOOM"
"I listen to at least one rap song, every single day now."
"It goes without saying that Zaloom is Voldermort"
Sara begs late night comedians for help.
Sara begs late night comedians for help.
Sara begs late night comedians for help.
Sara begs late night comedians for help.
Sara reveals the terrible truth about Zaloom.
Sara reveals the terrible truth about Zaloom.
TL;DR pissing match
TL;DR pissing match about North Korea
TL;DR pissing match about North Korea
TL;DR pissing match about North Korea
Sara is VERY SMART, don't forget it.
It's always a SOCIAL EXPERIMENT when you get defriended.
The internet's solution to Sara's problems.
It wouldn't be an internet drama without this.
Sara is not a conservative.
Sara is not crazy.
The way every internet drama ends: pretentious copypasta
