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Keely Villar
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Every day, embarrassing pictures are uploaded to the internetz. One, however, caught Anonymous' attention. A single Anon, intrigued by a picture of a girl (unknown to Anon, at the time of posting, to be Keely Villar) having her cunt hair waxed while her friends lol'd, shared it with his fellow /b/rethren on 7chan on July 12, 2009. This sparked a quest to find out who the girl in the picture really was.
Luckily for our heroes, they had one fateful clue to point them in the right direction: The Lady Spartans. The girl in question was wearing a shirt with the name of her school's soccer team on it. From there, Anonymous split up to scour the internets for further clues. They found the Lady Spartans' Webpage, complete with a roster of girls who played for the team. They also found out the team was from East Ascension High School in Gonzales, Louisiana.
In The Beginning
Anon utilized the roster and the process of elimination to narrow down the possibilities. There was no other way to do it than to rule out girls who obviously weren't OP's prey and compile a list of the ones that might be a match. After some digging around, the crack team of scientists at 7chan believed there were only 2 candidates: Amanda Woodward and Tabitha Babin.
Amanda Woodward
Most believed they had finally pinpointed their suspect, dismissing Tabitha as being a possibility anymore. Amanda was now being tracked through Anon's laser-guided scopes. Anon was almost ready to pounce, and once he found her and her friends' Facebook pages, he did.
Anonymous on MySpace and Facebook
After 48 hours, Anon started creating MySpace and Facebook accounts to stalk and troll Amanda. The most notable of these were Chinga Gaboo, GO LADY SPARTANS!, and Jeffrey McMann.
Chinga Gaboo
Under the name Chinga Gaboo, Anon created a Facebook and devised a plan to epically troll Amanda. The plan was to post the vag-wax picture as his default, then send as many friend requests to students at East Ascension in hopes they would all see the picture once they received the request. The process was slow and the anticipation was painful, but it was a good source of lulz while Anonymous prepared itself for the shitstorm that was believed to soon ensue.
GO LADY SPARTANS!
A MySpace account named GO LADY SPARTANS! was created by Chinga Gaboo behind over 9000 proxies for the same reason he made the Facebook. He was much more successful with the MySpace account than the Facebook account. This MySpace page of Anon's was taken down halfway through the incident, but only an hour later, a new page with the same name was up, being protected by an even greater barrier of proxies. The page currently receives questions and hate mail from Keely and her friends.
Jeffrey McMann, A.K.A. Agent 007chan
Known as GO LADY SPARTANS! on MySpace, the brave Anon soon donned the disguise of Jeffrey McMann and pretended to be a graduate of East Ascension and a friend of Amanda's so he could attempt to dig up more information. He began instant messaging a girl in Amanda's class through Facebook, named Chelsea Haydel.
In the messages sent, Jeffrey feigned concern for his "friend" and asked Chelsea to verify whether or not it was Amanda. He said that if it was Amanda in the picture, her life could be ruined. Chelsea told Jeffrey that the girl in the picture wasn't Amanda, though, so Jeffrey pried harder to try and get the real identity. After talking with Chelsea for a while, Chelsea starting becoming suspicious and looked through the yearbooks for Jeffrey. After she figured out he wasn't really a student, she stopped giving him information. Although Jeff didn't figure out who was in the picture, he could return to his /b/rothers on 7chan with the conclusion that it wasn't Amanda, unaware that they had already figured that out.
Keely Reveals Herself
While sending requests to Amanda's friends, GO LADY SPARTANS! received a message from a Keely Villar, being all butthurt about the picture. Anonymous shat bricks as they realized they had been targeting the wrong girl the entire time, at which point they immediately turned their attention to Keely.
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Keely BAWWWWWs about the picture.
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Anon's response to Keely's tears.
Taylor Bourque
The girl in the gray shirt doing the waxing is Taylor Bourque. She's not on the Lady Spartans soccer team, but she is an EAHS cheerleader.
Trolling Keely
Keely, not understanding who she was dealing with or how far her picture had already spread, begged for the picture to be taken down. Anon, seeing this golden opportunity, took down the picture and demanded noodz if they were to keep it down. Keely didn't comply on time, so the picture was put back up. Keely returned, begging again, only to get the response from anon, "you know what to do." Anonymous is currently patiently awaiting the fap-material they demanded and have yet to see results.
—Anonymous |
Guise, Keely Needs Halp
Much like Anonymous was hoping, word got out to friends of Keely on MySpace and, at slow-as-fuck speed, they messaged the Undercover MySpace Anon in control of the GO LADY SPARTANS! account with lulzy questions and hate mail.
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plz dlt kthx
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Where's the love?
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Anon gives Shane the answer he probably wasn't looking for.
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Shane fires back with anti-lulz.
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Anon has self-inflicted issues.
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Rawr.
Drew Villar
With Keely's MySpace name set to keely (rest in peace drewber), Anonymous became interested as to who was this mentioned "drewber" person she was exposing to the internets. Originally unbeknownst to Anonymous, Andrew "Drewber" Villar was Keely's older brother and a 2007 EAHS graduate. He went on to play football at Tulane University in New Orleans, LA, but kicked the bucket on April 30, 2009. The news (along with some links discovered through Google Magic) was delivered right back to the Keely thread on 7chan. This explains the "too much going on in my life right now" claim, which probably doubled the amounts of butthurt she was feeling. Who knows what crazy shenanigans will befall her next? Maybe she'll get knocked up.
Keely's Age
Keely graduated from EAHS is June 2009, which would make her of legal age and NOT CP jailbait, but due to uncertainty, the original two pictures from that glorious night have been removed from this article, so you'll have to deal with the edited ones, faggots.
External Links
- Keely's MySpace (Private)
- Keely's Facebook (Also Private)
- GO LADY SPARTANS!
- "Jeffrey McMann's" Facebook
- Drew Villar's Facebook
- Cool death, bro
- Moar news on The Drewberator's IRL pwnage
- The Lady Spartans Official Webpage
Keely Villar is part of a series on Visit the Whores Portal for complete coverage. |
Keely Villar is part of a series on Visit the Chans Portal for complete coverage. |