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Luigi Mangione
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Conspiracy Alert The subject of this article is the victim of a massive conspiracy by the Social Mafia. You should trust noone and come to your own conclusions after careful consideration of the facts. |
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This article is paid for by taxpayers like you. Thanks, America. |
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If you live in the New York area, law enforcement would like you to know that it is very important that you do not educate yourself on jury nullification. |
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| Luigi Mangione | |
| Born | May 6, 1998 (26 years old) |
| Nationality: | Americunt 
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| Class | Paladin |
| Highscore | Minibosses: 1 |
| Exp. | $49 Million - ? Billion |
| Unlocked | Infinite Pussy |
| Top 50? | Yes |
| Style | FPS, Single player |
| An Hero? | No |
| Motive | Retaliation against United Healthcare |
—Luigi Mangione | ||
In the sleek halls of midtown Manhattan's business district, where power suits and overpriced lattes reign supreme, few dared to question the untouchable fortress that is corporate America—until Luigi Nicholas "Mangina" Mangione decided to write his own chapter.
Gameplay Footage
A Modern-Day Teddy K?
Mangione, a valedictorian with CompSci degrees from the University of Pennsylvania, seemed destined for the Silicon Valley dream: stock options, a standing desk, and ethically dubious startup ventures. But somewhere between algorithm optimization and attending fraternity mixers, Luigi had an epiphany. Why dismantle the system through code when you can take a more... direct approach?
Armed with a "ghost gun" (because traditional firearms are so passé), Mangione allegedly set out to challenge the corporate overlords one CEO at a time. His target? Brian Thompson, a titan in the healthcare industry and embodiment of the capitalist ideal. The execution—both literal and figurative—was as calculated as any boardroom merger: wait, strike, and vanish into the crowd, leaving the NYPD scratching their heads balls.
Brian Thompson was an evil man because he didn't give every "hard-working" American free infinite gender affirming and/or gastric bypass surgeries from Harvard-educated doctors.
Setup
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The “Why” Heard Around the Boardroom
Recovered from Mangione’s belongings was a manifesto—a three-page, handwritten ode to disillusionment with corporate America. Described as a cross between a hacker's diary and a philosophy undergrad’s late-night rant, it painted Mangione not as a criminal, but as a misunderstood artist taking a bold stand against the oppressive machine.
High Tech, Higher Drama
The weapon of choice, a 3D-printed ghost gun, speaks volumes about Mangione’s innovative spirit. Why settle for a store-bought firearm when you can disrupt the weapons industry too? Add a suppressor for flair, and you’ve got a plotline worthy of a Netflix true-crime docuseries.
McBetrayal
While Luigi was savoring the smokey flavor of a delicious McRib, a McDonald's employee called 911 (not the hotline) and cashed in on the $60,000 reward got absolutely nothing. OOPS. As a consolation prize they will go the rest of their life knowing they're a class traitor who, after delivering (allegedly) the most wanted man in America on a silver McPlatter, got screwed over by the cops just the same.
Luigi's arrest in a Pennsylvania McDonald’s gave the cops plenty of opportunity to plant evidence, like the supposed manifesto. Because, y'know, he'd just have that on him. Why not? The irony of him being brought to the authorities by a useful idiot controlled by short sighted greed is not lost on anyone, except Brian Thompson, who is still dead from a terminal case of being that very thing. The tech-savvy renegade was caught munching fries, betrayed by a fast-food worker who doesn't deserve the minimum wage they're not getting, while the corporate machine closed in.
Legacy of Lunacy
Now awaiting trial, Mangione’s story is less a cautionary tale and more a bizarre chapter in the annals of corporate drama. Is he a martyr for the disenchanted masses or just another cog in the machine, destined to be forgotten once the next scandal hits Wall Street? Only time—and Netflix ratings—will tell. He seemingly was a big Ted Kaczynski fan.
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Breloom used Bullet Seed! It's super effective! -
Solid Review, 10/10
Gallery
See Also
- Gian Luigi Ferri - Another Italian-American High Scorer who shares a name with the man in green.
- Susan Wojcicki - Another former CEO who died in 2024 (from cancer).
- Health Care Rage
- Civilization VI - Programmed parts of this game.[1]
External Links
TOW coverage- TOW coverage on the shooting
EDF thread- EDF thread on his arrest
Obligatory Kiwi Farms thread
PepMangione
Pep- His Github
- His resume
- Archive of his Facebook page shows friend likes for further digging.
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Luigi Mangione is part of a series on Visit the Truth Portal for complete coverage. |
| Luigi Mangione is part of a series on serious business |
Serious Concepts
Free Speech • Identity theft • Irony • Internet asshole • Internet Celebrities • Internet disease • Internet drama • Internet humanitarians • Internet Law • Internet lawsuit • Internet lawyer • Internet stalking • Internet tough guy • Internet Vigilante Group • Operation Falcon Punch • Swatting • Vandalism • World Wide Web Consortium People & Organizations
2cash • Alan Turing • Casey Serin • David Hockey • Dear Cis People • Doxbin • Fast Eddie • Grace Saunders • Hallcats Squadron • Jessi Slaughter • Mary Bell • Meek Mill • Kittens • Maja Schmidt • Missy • Niggest Crook Force • Psychopath • Vloggerheads • WEB SHERIFF |
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 Luigi Mangione is part of a series on Pokémon [Who’s that Pokémon?] | |||||||
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[Sing Me The Song Of My People]
399BC: First recorded troll-banning |
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Luigi Mangione is a Good New Article. See the template page for more info. |
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| Featured article December 14, 2024 | ||
| Preceded by Destiny |
Luigi Mangione | Succeeded by Adam Lanza |