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DJ KEEMSTAR
DJ Keemstar (Real name: Daniel Keem, also known by his government name Rat Gnome) is a known pedophile, sex offender, and leader of a clan on XBox Live made up of 12 year olds known as the Federation of Asshole Gamers or the F@G. He has gained a following of underage Halo fanboys who call their dungeon master "Halo's #1 Trashtalker". IRL, he's a butthurt father with an extreme amount of USI. Keem spends his life on Xbox Live, BlogTV, and YouTube where he has 50,000 subscribers from dick riding machinima directors and Cunt of Duty commentators. He was the #1 most subscribed commentator on BlogTV, which he accomplished by raging to his fans that it's his life goal to be the most subscribed on the entire fucking website. If you think about it, it's not that hard to be the #1 most subscribed on a shitty web site that no one uses. It is extremely likely that he will at some point stumble upon this article and turn it into another excuse for him to fap to his own name.
The retard behind the online retard
DJ and his Ego
From becoming a minuscule internet celebrity, DJ has become filled with unwarranted self importance to compensate for his lack of talent. He rants about shit no one cares about on the internet; some argue that he just has his head up his ass but they are usually just butthurt because he won't let them suck his tiny penis. The most common explanation is that he fancies himself the king of the Internets due to the surplus of 12-year-old boys at his sexual disposal. Experts believe he is aware of what a loser he is but to him it's AWWRIGHT!
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BlogTV show
Every day, DJ broadcasts a live show at this location which amazingly racks up hundreds to thousands of viewers at any given time. He plays his shitty music that he made during these shows. After playing his music until your ears bleed, DJ will either do one of two things for the remaining time in the stream: rage about shit nobody cares about for extended periods of time, or attempt to impress his fans by trash talking kids half his age on a shitty FPS game. The entire viewing of the show is listening to the enormous faggot ramble about how he's famous, blocking communications with every fanboy who sends him a message over Xbox Live saying how much they love his videos. DJ will also beg everyone watching his stream to donate to his Paypal account; he needs money because he doesn't have a real job. His sad excuse for a "job" is slowly transforming YouTube into a steaming pile of shit. Then, after doing all his faggotry, DJ advertises to his fans that they can buy a friend slot or moderator position on the BlogTV chat for a mere $20.00. Should you pay $20 to be on DJs friend list, you should know that he will remove you if you do anything "annoy" him. No srsly.
Some reasonable ways to get on his nerves include:
- Wanting to play with him.
- Messaging him multiple times because you paid $20 and he won't play with you.
- Betraying him.
- Verbally pwning him in a trash-talking stream. He cannot handle anything that might pwn his image and will rage hard at you if you say anything as such.
If you paid $20.00 to be a mod of the Blog TV chat you can expect similar treatment. You can also lose your $20.00 title for posting his girlfriends number or links in public chat, specifically links to this article. It should also be said that because DJ lets any loser with $20.00 to their name moderate chat, rather than choosing someone remotely competent for the job, they all abuse their power and boot anyone who isn't worshiping the faggot; especially for stating disapproval of any copyrighted material that he broadcasts.
—DJ KEEMSTAR every night on his stream begging his fans to pay him or else he cant pay his bills and his girlfriend will leave him. |
This loyal fag paid $20.00 for mod powers and got them taken away.
How to Trash Talk like Kumstar
The following is a simple and accurate guide so that anyone can sound like Halo 3's #1 trashtalker.
- First you should lurk matchmaking until you find a young child, someone with a speech impediment, or a sexually unexposed teenage girl. Don't worry about being reported. You're famous so Microsoft can't ban you!
- Next, you will want to insult your targets entire team based on their color as chosen automatically and randomly by the Halo Matchmaking System. If they are the red team, call them names such as Elmo fluffers, tomato fuckers, or furfags. Similarly, the Blue Team can be called smurfs, blue dildos, or other unfunny shit. As long as it is overflowing with profanity and high volume it is sure to be a success.
- Make sure your target has their microphone plugged in because now it has become time to make fun of their gamertag. That's right, every gamers highest pride and joy is their gamertag so the most epic lulz can be achieved by making fun of it.
- Your target will realize how hard they have been trolled and will try to retort. By now, the game will undoubtedly have started and you should begin betraying them mercilessly.
- From this point, you will want to speak loudly and incoherently so that nobody can understand what the fuck your victim is saying. This accomplishes a definite win in the dispute and leads to the final conclusion.
- Pretend to start betraying them and, instead, let them betray you. Ask them a "clever" question to get them to say the word boot before you boot them from the game.
Congratulations, you are now one of Halo's best shit talkers.
Keemstar Nation
"Keemstar Nation" is the moronic name DJ gave to his fans. The demographic who find him relatable grew up with out a father figure to pwn any trash talker they encountered over XBOX Live. They found a troll with many YouTube views and decided to follow him until their balls dropped and they found something better to do. Every KKK Nation member can't handle bad things being said by their deity due to his demagogic nature. The common reaction to anything short of Keemstar worship is attempting to vandalize ED: a stupid and pointless thing to try. Half of the time, DJ says he does everything for his fans and the other half, he claims he does it for the money. This raises much confusion as he has never done much of anything apart from ranting and posting gameplay videos on YouTube. Should you tune into his Blog TV channel, you will undoubtedly hear him rambling about how he brightens every emo faggots day, being the "clever troll" that he is.
You can troll Keemstar Nation at this URL.
Trolling DJ
- It won't matter what you say. This faggot will rage over anything!
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—DJ KEEMSTAR |
The Underage Sex Scandal
In the Summer of 2018 on July 4th, the Police Department's Sexually Exploited Child Unit began a criminal investigation on Keem. The same day, his best friends wife, told police that she did believe Keem had molested her son. On July 6th, a search warrant was issued, allowing police to search Keem's filthy, rat infested home. Police questioned 30 children who were friends of Keem and in his "clan", with all stating that Keem was indeed a child molester. A police officer involved in the investigation told The media that plenty of evidence (medical, photographic and video) could be found, supporting criminal filing. The same day the allegations were made public. He is currently now awaiting trial.
Tale of Demise
Rise to Flame
One of the other G@Y members, Deranker, found DJ in a matchmaking game where he was yelling at the other players like any other butthurt Halo 3 player. From there, they slowly gained an internet following by convincing 12-year-olds their XBOXs were getting hacked and pretending to masturbate to girls over Halo 3 matchmaking. DJ has been doing this whole F@G thing, unaware that asshole isn't an adjective, for almost 2 years now. How did he get so popular? Well, if you haven't noticed, not like the other F@G leaders, F@G is DJ's life. He needs to prostitute himself to make a living so he can please his 12-year-old fanbase; thus boosting the loser's self-esteem since he has no friends IRL. He whores himself out via the use of an anonymous 20-something-year-old Hispanic male who pretends to be a robot under the gamertag THE BAD ROBOT. Despite its apparent success in fooling children, it is painfully obvious to be a text-to-speech program found on most Windows OS called Microsoft Michelle. Everyone knows that DJ Keemstar would be a nobody if not for his audience considering what he does, ANYONE can do.
Artistically Trolled
DJ is extremely proud of his fabulous YouTube channel. It has viewers in the thousands. But most of all he's proud of the BlogTV banner he paid a professional for. I'm not shitting you. This egomaniac Guido paid some Britfag designer who has skills in flash that could be comprised within an afternoon of wanking and basic tutorials. You can view the immense amount of suck here. Of course, it's understandable as to why DJ would pay someone to create shit for him and get ripped off like the idiot he is. He's too busy streaming his live show.
Pwnd? Pwnd.
Before DJ was dick riding everyone in Machinima and only had around 15,000 subscribers, he had to figure out a way to get more famous on the internet. DJ had spammed trash talking fights to establish himself as a champion so when he scored an audience with some MLG trashtalker named Walshy, he thought he had convinced the world that he was, in fact, serious business. This video amassed many views as all the faggots who worship DJ thought he pwnd MLG. Not long after the videos release, his cameraman uploaded an unedited version of the video showing that it was just someone with a modded gamertag being talked through the video and agreeing to be publicly pwnd. This caused much butthurt to all of the F@G and lulz among the fanboys.
—DJ KEEMSTAR trying to look legit |
Machinima was M-M-M-MEAN TO ME
Bungie Studios had a nasty virus in their system. The F@G wasted no time in taking advantage of said glitch and stealing Halo: Reach Beta codes several days before it's public release. DJ promptly put in his beta code, despite his account being banhammered at the time, to play Halo: Reach with all of the people who were privileged enough to receive a Beta code legitimately. DJ immediately began betraying people left and right like the team player he is until he pissed off someone who was a bigger name than he, known as "f1stdacuffs".
DJ became butthurt because Machinima would not let him upload the video of f1stdacuffs betrayal and so began their petty YT rage battle like the immature assholes they are. DJ made an unfunny parody character of f1stdacuffs: whom he dubbed "f1stdabutts".
Getting hacked
DJ got hacked countless times during his shitty pathetic lifespan. Some of the script kiddies who played an OTI round of weep-the-guido were:
- Vv3AsOne - A l33t hecker who got DJ's accounts on a bunch of social networks.
- The Most Regal - Sold the IP and password database of all 1,250 of his fans in April, '10 when he quit.
- KnOwN As FrOsTy - Proved DJ's phone number by calling during a live stream for all to see, and called in a swat team on keemstar.
- CaLL Me MaXWeLL - Told DJ a secret way of getting his gamertag unbanned, knowing that he would change the gamertag and get it banned, it was a success. See more in DJ KEEMSTAR#DJ Vs. XBL-Enforcement Team.
Notable hackers that fucked up Keemstar
Vv3AsOne
An internet tough guy who:
- Hacked DJ's Twitter.
- Perma-banned his facebook.
- Got himself AssholeGamers.com Account/Mod privileges
- Goatse'd Keemstar.com
- Shared the YouTube channel, and helped upload a shitload to it.
- Hacked his Machinima account, he had to get a brand new contract.
- Has dox on DJ flowing in a constant stream out of his arsehole.
- Recently found an exploit on the filmon.com server which allowed him to steal disc space/bandwidth in the gigs in a matter of minutes.
- Trolled DJ by giving him what he thought was his address.
- Contacted DJ's ISP and successfully shut down his home phone, internet, and TV services.
After it was discovered, he created a curl script, and released it open sourced. It lasted about an hour before Alki discovered that he had taken around 10 gigs of disc space, and 30 gigs of bandwidth with it. And who could forget how he shut him down while streaming for about a month almost everyday in a constant quest for the lulz.
The Most Regal
DJ's next unlucky web encounter was with The Most Regal who been tortured by DJ the longest (masochist) in his basement of secrets. Three months to be exact. Regal bought keemstarnation.com, djkeemstar.com, and haloderanker.com and took over on federationofassholegamers.com. Regal is the one who turned DJ into what he is today; a respectable and generous human being. When Regal showed DJ how to get google ads on websites, (DJ spelled it 'websight'). DJ went batshit crazy on making sure his personal army of faggots spam clicked everything. DJ quit his job due to the income this generated: about $250 per day. He gave a quarter to Regal and kept a quarter but said he reinvested the other half when he blew it on cigarettes for his girlfriend.
Eventually Regal and DJ got in fights due to Regal being just as much of a money grubbing Jew. He would make the f@ggot look like a newf@g on his own live stream. It wasn't long before Regal got bored of being DJ's BDSM whore and wanted to do something for the lulz. He was given a moderator position on DJ's popular BlogTV stream. Regal's troll face immediately came out and he banned hundreds of people including DJ's IP address. He changed the background to Miley Cyrus pics, forcing DJ to ragequit OVER 9000 times. Consequences were never the same because Regal decided to delete the site with 1,250 members on it. The extensive lulz didn't end there! He took the databases which contained everyone's IP addresses and passwords. He started hacking whomever crossed his path, officially pwning the entirety of the f@ggots.
—DJ KeemStarOfDavid in his Jew quest to steal Google's money |
DJ Vs. XBL-Enforcement Team
Last Thursday, DJ woke up one morning to turn on the good old Xbox. At that given moment, his gamer-tags started to get locked. They were under investigation by Microsoft. DJ was in rage mode over this; especially when he found out trolls were calling in Xbox-live and reporting ownership of his gamertags and calling him a hacker. The F@G community went under a brief moment of panic and became very butthurt. As DJ was yelling in his mic on the live stream, the chatters started spamming up a shitstorm as usual. The solution?
- Make a JewTube video.
- Call up all the F@G fan boys.
- Give a dramatic speech that the world is AIDS.
- Gather his army of delusional fans who think they can change how the world works.
- Tell them to call up Microsoft and do the same thing to other people's gamertags as well.
After the so called storm on Xbox-live had finished, and the world had changed according to Keemstar, Xbox-live changed their policy so people wouldn't be so easily social engineered. The fan boys popped boners and were all treated to a speech saying that if it weren't for the fans none of this would have happened. "20 dollars PayPal to [email protected]". Well, during the phone calls the F@G fans made to Xbox live support, one of the mods of the live show reported that his gamertag was hacked. He went by the name of WingsofRedemption: which happens to be a popular name in the gaming community and a victim of Keemstars rise to fame. WingsOfRedemption didn't want to take any more of DJ's faggotry and wanted to end him once and for all. Wings proceeded to tell other big Machinima directors (and Machinima itself) the truth behind DJ: how much of a Jew he really is. Keemstar got wind of the situation and made a butthurt YouTube video. Now, with DJ calling him out, Wings became very nervous. The f@ggots had a reputation for raiding and shutting down YouTube channels. To cover his ass, Wings called up the gods of Xbox-live and showed everything that was wrong with DJ KreamlovingFaggot.
Nothing happened for several days. Eventually, Xbox-live Enforcement Team caught wind of the situation and began to view Haloahole videos on YouTube. The Xbox-Live Gods were very disappointed to see the faggotry that was taking place on their motha' fuckin' networks. The almighty Microsoft raised it's ban hammer for the 9000th time and, thus, Deranker, 2 Bucks, DJ, and DJ's fake robot account would all have to be transferred to a brand new console. Of course, DJ accomplished this by begging for money on the live stream. What DJ didn't know is that the enforcement team was monitoring the show and banning whatever account he violated the rules of Xbox-live with. The Xbox-live enforcement team director, Stepto, was the main individual banning/suspending DJ's gamertags. In no time at all Stepto became a God among all the people who hate and despise Keemstar. Keemstar began raging even more. He threatened Stepto with legal action claiming his retarded inbred brother is a lawyer who would pick up the case. DJ's big plan was to sue Microsoft; thinking he could collect his Jew gold on the damages of so-called "harassment". The stupid guido fuck forgot to read the Xbox-Live Code of Conduct and Terms of Use every single time he agreed to them. Hey now, DJ did know what he was talking about since his last job was to use scare tactics into getting people to pay off debts they owed to the government.
Being the lolcow he is, DJ called his personal army onto the live stream; telling them to spam Steptos Twitter and mention Bill Gates. Apparently, he thought someone would give an abortion's ass. Around four-hundred fans from the live stream began to spam and then promptly became bored and quit. It didn't stop there! DJ called up his good YouTube pal, Ishatonu, who actually had a semi-intelligent fan base. He tried to explain the situation "in his own way." It soon turned into incoherent rambling about how Microsoft was harassing him and banning his accounts because he's gay. The gay jokes wouldn't stop coming from DJ, which brought about many lulz because Stepto is a flaming homosexual IRL. DJ begged Shat to tell his fans to get in the live show and help alleviate the situation. Shat didn't want to touch the retard's problems with a 10-foot pole so he made DJ a thread on /b/ and bowed out. Unfortunately for DJ, the thread looked like a personal army request. Once DJ saw the thread he began to get wet thinking anonymous would fix everything for him... but as the thread unraveled it read only "not your personal army". Trolls began to drop DJ's dox taking full advantage of a back raid. DJ, being the fail guy that he is, watched the thread and stated that only three people were repeating the same stuff over and over. He thought he was invincible from anon because he brought up a good word about them on the live stream and even made a freestyle days before: saying "anony anony anony" over and over again. The thread aged and aged, and as it sunk into the darkest pits of /b/, it took DJ's hopes and dreams with it. Helpless and at a loss for words, DJ tried to lol and get back to being the biggest retard on BlogTV.
To add even more lulz icing on the bawwwww cake, DJ was under the assumption that Stepto was, purposefully without reason, harassing him when, in truth, by creating each account with the purpose to troll and cause drama over Xbox-Live, he was violating Xbox-Live's code of conduct. Due to his and F@G's publicly-streamed repeated offenses, he was setting himself up for the ban hammer. It wasn't over yet. He announced that he would sue Stepto for taking away his "right to free speech". Unbeknownst to DJ, Stepto was acting on behalf of Microsoft and couldn't be sued solely. He would have been suing Microsoft which has as much chance of winning as DJ has of getting laid.
Now that DJ and F@G had caught Xbox-Live Enforcement's attention, F@G would no doubt end in a lulzy demise.
Lulzy Demise
Thanks to the efforts of those with a sense of lulz and a little help from /b/, DJ had been harassed. His IRL Dox had been found out and advertised for all of 4chan and Encyclopedia Dramatica to see. Because of their efforts, the Xbox LIVE moderators had stumbled across his fail and gotten on his case. It was only a matter of time before the shit hit the fan.
On August 24 2014, DJ KEEMSTAR gave up on fighting Live and announced the end of F@G. He played one last game on the Blogtv stream, which ended with another banhammer. He gave a last goodbye and then removed moderator privileges from everyone. All of the fanboys became butthurt because they couldn't power trip with the $20 they gave him. A fanboy by the name of gangstaJ007 decided to retract around 2000 dollars from DJ's Paypal; making the account go negative and frozen. With a negative PayPal account, and his moniez all gone, DJ was forced to return to work as a librarian or else make his 1 year old daughter homeless.
It seems DJ's sexual robot slave is going to the PS3 (not like he'll find that many people with a mic to troll anyway). DJ later announced that he will be not quitting. He and the rest of F@G, such as Denigger, Fagbot, and 2 Cocks, will continue making videos. Instead of wreaking havoc, they decided they woould take clips of halo players becoming LOL RAGE and send them to Xbox; basically becoming what they so much despised. DJ has acquired a new ass slave by the name of bluepoint951: who agreed to handle his PayPal (a classic move by DJ: putting all his trust in a completely incompetent stranger). Eventually, bluepoint had enough and ragequit as well. You see, bluepoint is a legitimate homosexual who has a 7-inch uncircumcised penis. Therefore, he needs a man who is bigger; however, he ended up being the receiver of rage and DJ's 1.3 inch penis. A game of "just the tip in" for bluepoint would be full insertion for DJ. So after DJ had gotten back on his feet, bluepoint fucked off.
You're Fired & I'm Laying the Law Down!
On October 30, 2010, DJ accused bluepoint951 of stealing his money and fucking with the PayPal when it was nearly time to pay his bills. His girlfriend had recently quit his dick for not being able to make enough money; thereby forcing her out of the kitchen and into the real world. In an attempt to "create" entertainment out of being fuck'd in the asshole by a vagina and his online accountant, DJ convinced the hive mind that they were the victim of thought control from bluepoint951, ironically. Apparently bluepoint951 had been planning a mutiny with several other Moderators to overthrow DJ from his fictional seat of power. BUT WAIT! He was also having a gay online relationship with an underage BlogTV user by the name of crossfaaade. DJ's claim to prove this supposed relationship was a fan sign of them together.
Over the next several days, DJ accused bluepoint951's squadron of being a stream full of trolls; guilty of betrayal and were trying to ruin his show. He proceeded to "fire" several mods and "law the law down" on the rest of his stream. DJ attempted to send several of his best moderators and fans as spies to watch for an "attack" from bluepoint951's blogTV stream; however, nothing of the sort succeeded and the attempt to "troll the trolls" failed. As everyone on bluepoint951's stream discovered as the days past, "DJ is right 100% of the time always" and "will one day be on G4 TV." A true monument of his own glory. You can see these conversations at this URL.
Guys, Show Some Respect. Chuck is Dead.
On November 4, 2010 at 6:30PM EST, DJ announced that he was going to be sponsored by FilmOn.com. He would never need any more donations from his viewers! To celebrate his increased sell-out status, was going to give valuable items away for free: a whole collection of his old banned Xbox 360 Slims.
—DJ KEEMSTAR masturbating to a picture of himself |
The site began to get mass amounts of views from fans spamming the Special link. DJ, being his usual self, started gloating about how his fame crashed the website. This faggotry went on for about an hour until the creator of FilmOn.com, Alki David, called DJ and told him that Vv3AsOne and friends had been DDoSing the fuck out of him via an exploit that skull-fucks bandwidth. Alki was quick to assure DJ that the police had been contacted and the perpetrators had been arrested. Not long after, DJ was playing Xbox Live as usual until he received a phone call. He returned to the show to announce that he had just learned of a death in the family. Chuck Keem, his brother, had just entered necrophilia territory. After announcing the death, some other f@ggot became co-host of the show as DJ went away from keyboard to baw. After announcing his brothers "death", he told his slave-bit moderators to link to a bot site so he could sell e-mails overseas; allowing access to all his fans credit information. His blogtv show was hacked and shutdown by a troll streaming gay pron on 11/16/2010.
—DJ's basement-dwelling moderators |
Brb, Cyber Police
On November 19, the Holland New York police department was cleverly deceived by someone who DJ claims to be MiZ Fr0sTi (his greatest cumdumpster nemesis), but was probably just anon, called the pigs and claimed to be a deaf person being held hostage in a bathroom at DJ's address. The police were also told that DJ was wearing a razor blade necklace and was about to an hero. Being relatively unexposed to trolling, the police could not simply say lol internet. They dispatched a SWAT team and several police cars in order to save the hearing impaired from having to bathe in the Keem residence. DJ was out having a smoke when the cops arrived and held him at gunpoint. His wife and 1 year old daughter were next out of the house, and it was around this time that DJ realized that he was being trolled. His response was the same as always: make a YouTube video, display a massive case of victim complex, and tell the internet that YA DUN GOOF'D.
Notice the disguised ED article? Previous Video | Next Video |
The cancer comes back
January 18, 2011, after three months of hiatus and making extremely shitty videos they called "classics", F@G declared they were coming back. This of course meant that DJ Keemstar and company would make more videos of yelling at 13 year old boys and stroking their e-peen. They were still terribly unfunny unless you were prepubescent. In their debut video, DJ pulled out one of his dumb ass personalities, DJ Redneck. He tried really hard to troll a kid but he, once again, makes himself look stupid as hell. The kid didn't even rage. He also forgets David beat Goliath.
—DJ Keemstar confirming he is a pedo |
MinecraftStars
Minecraftstars was a Minecraft "community" for his fans. DJ being DJ tried to use it for making money. Fans had to pay 100$ to get on a server which was run by two people known as Dylan and Brien. However, This idea crashed in a sea of piss after 2 months when Dylan went batshit crazy and replaced the website and DJ's forums with his landlord's Facebook and DJ's real address over how DJ treats his "slaves". DJ claimed that Dylan stole $7,000 from him which was proven false when DJ bought a brand new flat screen TV and shitty DJ set by sheer coincidence.
— Big faggot asking for help from his slave |
After the whole deal with Dylan, Brien came out as a troll and changed the password to the YouTube channel and HIS PayPal
The END to his Youtube or faggotry
On September 1st, 2011 The main channel "Haloaholes" was shut down after Google caught on that he was selling partnership to people. This upset Google because it's illegal and against their terms of service, but we all know how DJ feels about terms of service. DJ claims that the 50 dollars for the partnership was a "deposit" to make sure that no one would upload pr0nz and get his account suspended. Either way Google did the internet a great service in killing some of the cancer.
- Youtube.com/haloaholes - Banned.
- Youtube.com/KEEM5TAR - Banned.
- Youtube.com/flagmyvids - Banned.
- Youtube.com/thekeemstarnetwork - Banned.
- Youtube.com/HappyGriefday - Banned.
- Youtube.com/FAGreborn F@G Channel - Banned.
Now, being the over-dramatic tard that DJ is, he had to make a self-promotion video about his channel's shutdown.
The only people who follow him now are 12 year olds with nothing else to do in their day. Oh wait, they already were. He also has a lonely ass blog channel where he satisfies his continuous urge to have buttsex with his trolls and anyone else on his channel, being the natural attention whore that he is. Did I mention that he loves Ron Paul?
LiveaRoo hacked
On March 16th, 2012, DJ KEEMSTAR declared war on Team Avolition via Twitter for unknown reasons. After several messages were exchanged between the two, DJ KEEMSTAR refused to admit Team Avolition's worthiness of ice cream on a Skype call. His website, http://www.livearoo.com, was defaced less than an hour after the call ended.
The contents of his website were replaced with an image of the Twitter message that started the confrontation and a video taunting DJ KEEMSTAR. At the time of this writing, his reaction to the incident is unknown because he has not answered any phone calls. In all likelihood, he will become an hero. Nope He's still being the greedy attention whore he's known for being
DJ vs. LifeInATent
Last Thursday, DJ ultimately decided it would be a great idea to call out fellow attention whore, MeganSpeaks (LIATs well known Spawn/Girlfriend). Since another man talked with his wimminz, rallied his YouTube robot army and B& ALL OF HIS ACCOUNTS INTO OBLIVION JUST AS HIS NEW CO-HOST MOVED IN
LIAT, for the first and only time in his life, was the hero. He had left DJ without YouTubes yet again.
DJ, soon after getting his just deserts, called his personal army to shut down LIATs twitter. Just like most recent 4chan raids, it was disorganized. They tried doxing him using typical doxing methods did not do proper fact checking. Feeling sad and depressed at the lack of means to whore himself, it became a daily routine for DJ to show up on Google Hangouts late at night, drunk and high beyond comprehension, like all good parents. It is likely the only thing keeping Keem in our realm are his undying fanboys, Mia, and his mentally lacking Hispanic Robot. He will soon likely end up becoming an hero.
Rust
Come August 2013, Keemstar had yet again surfaced on another miserable account (even trying to create a game) so that he could gather more money; eventually just recording footage of a new game called Rust. Keemstar got attacked by a group of people and killed in the game; culminating in a huge callout on his faggotry (including him having been proved to hack the game). He spent time in this period ranting on his 50th Twitter account where he has been shown liking his own videos to feed his ego. In an even more miserable attempt to keep his ego in check, he posted and abruptly removed this video shortly before pursuing other endeavours.
On 1/9/14, Keem finally got free VACation by Valve and went on twitter to complain to Garry Newman. His fans invaded the official forums to protest his ban because their dear leader could do no wrong.
DramaAlert and FaZe
After getting tired of Rust, BadKidsPodcast, and getting banned on most servers for trying to annoy children, Keemstar started up a new way to express his ego in the best way possible: trying to be a journalist. He started up a new channel under the name of DramaAlert with the help of a "fan" to prevent Google from banning it. Of course, Keem spiced his "news" up to make himself great in every way possible and most of the time, he was involved in his own "drama".
iDubbbzTV roasts Keemstar
On May 5th, 2016, cancer survivor, and dildo unboxer, iDubbbzTV, made a video. However, the only dildo and/or cancer featured in this video was our good friend, the Keem. In said video, iDubbbz exposes Keemstar's true identity as a garden gnome with a stupid beanie, and roasts the slimy manipulative cunt for his long history of hypocrisy. Watch the utter destruction here.
In a desperate attempt to save face, Keem immediately took to Twitter. Knowing there was nothing he could say to make himself appear less loathsome, the gnome did his best to play the video off as a joke.
<a href="https://twitter.com/KEEMSTAR/status/728321838493925376"></a>
Keem called it quits (again) shortly after this. iDubbbz's comeback? A fucking music video parodying; "Smash Mouth - All Star":
#RIP DRAMAALERT
JoeySalads' Investigation
Pyrocynical was the first to upload a large-scale "exposed" video, going over many topics involving Keemstar and what he's done to Pyro. Previous Video | Next Video |
His family
Mia aka Future Whore in
This is his pride and joy who he swears on every time he makes a to-be-broken promise. She will be a whore just like his girlfriend, Melissa. Just wait until she turns 13. She will turn out to be like Bish from battlecam: fucking everyone she can just for drugs because her dad spends his time shit talking instead of parenting her.
It's quite clear that Keem has all the intent of raising her to be a crack-whore. He often brings her into the arguments like a FATHER OF THE YEAR would do; usually blaming someone else for it and threatening to murder them for it.
—DJ Keemstar and his genius Parenting skills at work. |
Melissa
His girlfriend, Melissa, is a stupid blonde bitch who works for some crackhead cleaning company who has been with him for +5 years. She constantly goes out drinking with other men and woman with no mention of him on her Facebook. With photos to boot. Keem has often used her as a punching bag while drunk or high.
—Straight from the whore herself. |
His gamertags
- DJ KEEMSTAR - Banned.
- KEEMSTAR DJ - Banned.
- xDJ KEEMSTAR - Banned.
- DJ KEEMSTAR 911 - Banned.
- SPARKLES RAP - Banned.
- KEEMSTAR - Banned.
- LOVE me Stepto - Banned.
- GAY RIGHTS Ftw - Banned.
- PUNT a KITTY - Banned. (username not allowed)
- FEDERATION4LIFE - Banned.
- DJ KEEMSTAR 4ev - Banned.
- Heart Keemstar - Banned.
- KEEMSTAR vs U - Banned.
- Keemstar Legend - Banned.
- DJ KEEMSTAR FTW - Banned.
- x keemstar x - Banned.
- CJ DIPPA
- Try Hard Team
- ButtholeLicker9971
- Red Dead Gay
- ProTrashTalker
- pants on the gr
- AZiggy15
- Pit Stain99
- THE HAPPY ROBOT
- K22 Lives
- LORD KEEMSTA - Banned.
- KEEMSTAR 15BANS - Banned.
- King KEEMSTAR - Banned.
- DJ KEEMSTAR yes - Banned.
- iKEEMSTAR - Banned.
- X manger - Banned.
- KILL KEEMSTAR - Banned.
- YES HELP - Current gamertag.
F@G Gallery
See Also
External Links
- His ED account when he tried blanking Leafy's article
- Current Twitter (watch this one get banned too)
- Inactive for half a year
- Newest upcoming channel. Prepare your anus
- I give this one a month at most.
- Inactive - His failed minecraft community channel
- Battlecam.com Channel
- Old Myspace Gallery
- Proof of DJ's lack of understanding
Email addresses
Feel free to go spam the shit out of these:
- [email protected]
- [email protected]
- [email protected]
- [email protected]
- [email protected]
- [email protected]
- [email protected]
- [email protected]
- [email protected]
- [email protected]
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DJ KEEMSTAR is part of a series on Visit the Gaming Portal for complete coverage. |
DJ KEEMSTAR is part of a series on Visit the Trolls Portal for complete coverage. |
Featured article October 12, 2010 | ||
Preceded by MicahFennec |
DJ KEEMSTAR | Succeeded by Online Roleplaying |
Featured article May 6 & May 7, 2016 | ||
Preceded by Abu Hajaar |
DJ KEEMSTAR | Succeeded by San Francisco |