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ForeverKailyn
"ForeverKailyn" aka Kailyn Marie Wilcher-Hughes (fka KaiKhaod, LilKaiKaiz, KailynsKreations, SincerelyKailyn) is a fat, lazy, white trash 23-year-old self-proclaimed YouTube Beauty Guru, Socialite and Makeup Artist from Bowie, Maryland. To the rest of the world, she is a source of lulz, scandals, and retard drama.
The most notoriety linked to Kai was her feature on Vh1's Best Week Ever blog for her signature "Hey Everyjuan" video intro phrase, and her segment in Willam's Beatdown: Episode 9.
—Kailyn Marie Wilcher Hughes | ||
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Sunflower Associations
Personal Life & Family
Disability ass demon Kailyn Marie Wilcher (aka Kai (kay), ForeverFailyn, Kailyn Wilsher, Demon Kai, Kween Kai, Kaka, Kaivman, Gorilla, FAS rere, Potato-head Retarded thing, etc.) was birthed on May 18th 1990 to Lisa Sokoloski Wilcher (aka Mama Wilsher, Mama Wheelchair, Mama Alchy) and dirty ape beaner Michael Wilcher (aka Papa Wilcher, Papa Wilsher). Kailyn was born with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome and Asperger's Syndrome which has made her slow but has also given her a lulzy speech impediment. Kai's parents are separated, and Kai lives as a "stay-at-home daughter" with Lisa in a Bowie (aka Booie) mansion decked out in nothing but the most glamorous 1970's decor, and the finest of dinnerware, flatware and drink ware: paper plates, and plastic utensils and cups.
As soon as Mama Wilsher found out her precious potato head was retarded and deformed, Kai was doomed forever. Mama Wilsher tried enrolling Kai in various elementary schools before pulling her out of retard classes so she could do all of Kai's homework and let Kai rot in the Lavender Dungeon known as her room (formally Pink Dungeon), which has resulted in Kai having the reading level of a 2nd grader. Due to her moron of a mother, Kai has never been told she has any disabilities even though she has a hockey-stick palmar crease, a symptom belonging to only those with FAS, and was thoroughly retard-tested as a small demon.
Lisa works from an in-home salon Lisa's Hair Shanty twice a week doing old lady perms for the neighborhood hags while getting inebriated. Kailyn says that her dead-beat, enabling mother is her best friend, but in reality she's her caregiver and scapegoat for when a Kai scandal breaks. To support his pride and joy, Michael works at a courthouse cleaning air vents and is forced to live off microwave dinners in his shitty shack to ensure Lisa and Kai live a subsidized life.
Kai's extended uselessness of a family includes her Uncle Stephen E. Sokoloski (aka Uncle-Papa Stephen), his wife, and kai's archenemy, her 5 year old cousin, Eli who all live with granny, Dorothy Sokoloski. Her grandfather, Stephen R. Sokoloski, passed away at the Wilcher estate sometime in 2007 in the midst of Kai's $500 monthly MAC makeup hoard-hauling.
The Kween blamed uncle Stephen for giving her pizza face genes, while Papa Wilcher's family is blamed for her being a walrus.
Diet & Hygiene
Kailyn has admitted she does not use a shower and she does not wash her own hair because she gets shampoo in her eyes. Mama Alchy hoses Kai off in the driveway once a week and washes her hair in the Shanty's shampoo bowl.
To add to the smell, the Kween has been steadily been gaining weight since her start on Youtube. Every year the trolls harp on the obese whale and the following year they're more surprised than ever with her weight gain. At 5'2", the trolls estimate Kween Kai was nearing 200lbs in 2013 and are convinced she's well over 200lbs as she has moved into plus-sized clothing and was forced to move up to a size 10 shoe due to her obese flippers.
See Imgur album of the Kween's favorite foods.
Bella
Lisa bought Kai her one and only friend, Bella, a derpy mutt sold to them for thousands of dollars under the guise of being a purebred Yorkie. When Bella is not shitting and pissing all over the Wilcher mansion because she never gets to go outside, she is whimpering under the retard-strength of her owner. For entertainment purposes, Kai often sprays air freshener in Bella's face to make her "act silly".
Friends
Besides superficial friendships with fellow failures on youtube, Kai has only ever mentioned having a single friend, who is no longer her friend because she's a darkie.
David (Boyfriend, 2006-2011)
David (aka Davit) is Kai's only love. They started dating when Kai was a mouth full of teeth attached to a 15-year old retarded potato-head thing. Davit is a fatass who liked to party, drink and dabble in drugs, and was the only person to ever introduce Kai to socialization. Early in their relationship Kai and her mullet became pregnant with Avery Juan 1.0 but ended up being aborted at Davit and Mama Wilcher's demand. Throughout their 5 years together, Kai began her scandal timeline including camming, shoving her saggy gorilla tits in his friends' faces, having a 3-some with Davit and his friend "hot dave", and targeting craigslist for trannies and dykes to calm her retard-hypersexuality. But in the end, Kai's retard-hypersexuality and selfishness ruined their relationship. In 2011 Kai broke up with Davit on blog-tv to appease trolls telling her to do it for the lulz, and soon after ended the relationship for good.
After their break-up in 2011, Kailyn made a tell-all video about their relationship. Painting herself as an innocent victim, she said Davit was the one who made her get into the partying lifestyle. Davit responded with a rebuttal video, owning up to a few hard truths, but adding that she was both manipulative and a liar, and that everything she did was of her own free will.
Matt (Husband, 2011-Current)
Matthew Todd Hughes (aka Matt Drost, Madd, Hubby) is a fat, dough-faced, retarded fag-lover living in Maryland's "country" working as a cart-pusher at Wallyworld. Kai met Matt in the fall of 2011 on Plenty of Fish, when he was still dating Maureen Lewis. Mama Wilcher drove Kai to meet Matt for a date at Starbucks while supervising them from the parking lot. 3 short months later, Matt proposed to Kai with a fashion ring from Wal-Mart.
On April 13th 2012, Friday the Thirteenth, lulz were had. Kai and Matt arrived in their most dazzling attire to be wed at the elegant St. Mary's County courthouse. Kai wore a hideous ill-fitted $20 dress from Kohl's with with a dollar store tiara, while Matt simply rolled out of bed and dress in a Vintage McDonald's employee uniform. Matt has shown sexual interest in the gays by pseudo-hating them, and even making his potatohead wife go to church to cure her of bisexualism.
Mooren
Maureen Elizabeth Lewis (aka Mooren, Momo, Nignog, Nigger, Niggereen, Ape, Chimp) was first introduced to the internets after Kailyn and Matt began dating. She is a batshit insane welfare nigger with naturally drunk eyes, slurred speech, and, like Kai, a lulzy speech impediment. Matt denied knowing the wild ape, but was dating and having sex with her for several months before his new deformed retard, Kai, came into the picture [1][2]. Upon Kai's arrival, Matt ignored the nignog and lulzy obsessed stalking ensued. [3]
—The ravishing phrase Mooren repeated while stalking Madd at his work | ||
Mooren found forums and blogs online dedicated to trolling the FAS queen and started posting dirt on them herself. At her stalking peak, Mooren showed up at Wal-Mart several times a week and finally filmed her encounter with her ex, Matt. The crazy nignog has since slowed down, but is still stalking the couple. Trolls will only bait her for the lulz.
Married Life (2012-Current)
As of 2014, Kai and Madd live separately with their parents. Kai continues to live with her caregiver in Bowie while Matt lives with his white trash parents, Mary C. Hughes and Todd D. Hughes, and 27-year old Kai-esque sister, Amber, in Leonardtown. In the past, Matt would drive to Booie to visit Kai several times a month, but has since realized his wife is a hideous whale and visits once a month at most to pump his whale full of sperm. When confronted by the trolls about her shitty marriage, Kai insisted Matt lived with her in the glamorous Wilcher mansion. In the midst of yet another lie, Kai was caught after trolls found her uploading to instagram with geotags in Madd's location. In the beginning, Matt thought Kai was internet famous and thought he would get worshipped. Trolls have since drove him off the internet for good. Matt started to control Kai's internet access and if Kai disobeyed, mandatory beatings were had.
Pregnancy (2013)
The FAShionista had just turned 23 and having been a waste of space, she was desperate for a purpose. Fortunately, Avery Juan 2.0 aborted itself in March of 2013. Months later, our FAS queen succeeded in conceiving an Avery Juan 3.0 and is expecting her fatass, middle-aged stans to buy her shit for her soon-to-be government leech. Kai continues to purchase hundreds of dollars worth of makeup to add to her hoard every month despite the anticipation of her retarded potato spawn's arrival. Of course, it was almost impossible to get a good profile shot pre-pregnancy because she didn't want people to see how big her gut had gotten. Now she's so proud of her FUPA and loves to show it off.
Since Kai has no friends, Mama Alchy will be holding a baby shower involving their 5 family members and another was claimed to be hosted by the in-laws' church, Callaway Baptist Church. The church has since denied the claims and is disgusted that it has being associated with such a retarded potato-head thing.
The Beginning: KaiKhaod, KailynsKreations
KaiKhaod [chaos] began her Youtube career in 2007 with a misspelled user name and the most lulzy wtfery to grace the Youtube makeup community. The FAS teen made her appearance with a beautiful, bleached mullet doing makeup reviews and tutorials while being high as a motherfucking kite which only emphasized her tard talk. She is a fan of makeup-turned-mommy vlogger,xSparkage, and aspires to be just like her. Coincidentally, Kai and xSparkage became pregnant at the same time.
KaiKaod was eventually rage-deleted, paving the way for KailynKreations, which was again rage-deleted when new a scandal emerged.
The YouTube Sensation
ForeverKailyn (Currently Deleted)
Kailyn's lifeblood, her bread and butter. Boasting a high of almost 13,000 subscribers and average views receiving 1,000-3,000 views, it has taken Kai several years to get to such shitty success. Kai had her Google ad revenue disabled almost as soon as it was granted due to the Kween clicking her own ads in hopes for bigger paychecks[4] (which of course denied or threw her fail-mom under the bus for). Her uploaded videos include 20 minute foundation applications, Wal-Mart and Target clothing hauls and, in the past, outfit of the day (OOTD) videos which have ceased due to her overexerting her fatass to show an outfit. Rating are always disabled on her channels because the rating bar is always red.
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