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Daniel Iskandar: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 22:35, 9 October 2014
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Nobody has heard of this person, but whoever they are, vandalizing this article only makes us want to learn more... |
Daniel Iskandar (8th of November 1979) is a half-pint, fundamentalist Christian of Arab-Italian decent. Born in Sydney, Australia, Danny - as he is known to his friends - currently resides in the suburb of Mount Druitt where he claims to own his own house. Once a fat bastard, Danny decided to lose weight and build muscle so he can just be a bastard due to both of his parents being dead. The cause of his parents' death is unknown but they most likely committed suicide after realizing their son is a retard.
Career
From April 2011 to August 2012, Danny worked for Australia Post. He now aspires to be a fitness instructor.
Religious Views
Danny, a religious zealot and bigot, was witnessed posting on a Islam-related video where he told Muslims they were believing in the wrong God and referred to Islam as "the abomination".
Whenever Danny's minuscule brain encounters a problematic issue, he consults the Bible for an answer due to him not having the intelligence to resolve issue on his lonesome - he is obviously a man who would still be living with his mother and seeking her guidance if she wasn't being swallowed-up by worms.
Although Danny lives in Sydney, Australia, he is a member of the Westboro Baptist Church and an admirer of Pastor Fred Phelps. Danny can be frequently witnessed using homophobic slurs, such as "faggot", just like his idol Fred Phelps.
Danny is also a creationist despite him being living proof that we evolved from apes.
Homophobia
Like any real Christian (the fundamentalists are proper Christians), Danny absolutely loathes homosexuals; so much so, that he often accuses heterosexuals of being gay just so he can take advantage of the opportunity to use homophobic slurs at God's behest.
Physical Attributes
Danny is the typical muscle-head - being all brawn and no brains; however, Danny possesses two physical inadequacies which he perceives have always held him back:
- He is only 5' 4" (163cm)
- He injured his penis in a motorcycle accident in 2010.
Danny has black hair.
Once a fat, little bastard, Danny put down the cheeseburgers and picked up some dumbbells. He worked himself into reasonably good shape, but is still let down by his lack of height.
Despite being very ugly and short, Danny has a great deal of vanity as he is always taking selfies and posting them on the internet. He seems to be completely oblivious to the fact that he bares striking resemblance to an inbred, AIDS-infected chimpanzee and should be ashamed of his appearance.
Leg Lengthening Surgery
In August 2012, Danny quit his job at Australia Post to have cosmetic leg lengthening surgery. He arrived in New Delhi in October and joined members of Make Me Taller in Dr. Sarin's guesthouse. Once there, he began a diary on MMT to share his experience.
Danny's diary was heavily criticized for being uninformative, as he mostly wrote about boxing and mixed martial arts. Due to his low level of intelligence, it was also littered with spelling, punctuation and grammatical errors.
Danny had to cut his leg lengthening phase short as he suffered from a nerve issue. He achieved 6cm of lengthening, but his bones later compressed to give him 5cm of extra height. This brings his final height to 5' 6" (168cm), which is still very short.
Penis Enlargement Surgery
Danny was very insecure about his penis size, he would often psychologically project his small penis size onto other people when arguing with them (See examples of Danny stupidity below). During his consolidation phase, Danny traveled to the city of Mumbai in India to have penis enlargement surgery by having fat surgically removed his back and then added to his small penis.
Hobbies
His hobbies include motorbiking, playing computer games, exercising and boxing. Danny once bragged he beat up a 90kg bodybuilder and got charged for it. The likely story is: he got beat up and arrested for starting a fight with someone much bigger than him because he is really short and regularly punches above his weight due to him thinking he's hardcore just because he hits a punching bag once a week.
Views on Society
Danny abhors the police. He believes they are all corrupt and generalizes them as "revenue raisers". He bases this on past experiences with the police where he witnessed his parents being dragged off to prison for having the TV on too loud. He also believes that one cop caught smoking ice means they're all up to something.
Danny had his driver's license suspended for over a year, which comes as no surprise due to his immature personality.
Conspiracy Theorist
Danny believes 9/11 was an inside job. Little is known as to why he believes this, but being as gullible and as stupid as he is, he mostly likely heard/read someone mention the words "9/11 is an inside job" and took their word for it. This is of course wrong, as everyone knows that Jews did 911.
Gallery
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Loves taking pictures of himself -
Clearly a narcissist, doesn't realize how ugly he is -
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Using his fists to prop-up his biceps to make them look bigger -
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Stupid-looking big-hair to make him look taller -
Zealotry -
His ape-like appearance is concrete proof we evolved from monkeys -
Homo habilis in its natural habitat -
Homo habilis enjoying Homo sapiens fluids -
This timeline shows how far Danny has evolved and explains why he is so short.
Examples of Danny's Extreme Stupidity
Danny Idiot - Download and double-click on file to open in your browser
