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Fake News: Difference between revisions
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{{spoiler|EVERYTHING [[OTI]] and [[IRL]] IS FAKE NEWS!!!111}} | {{spoiler|EVERYTHING [[OTI]] and [[IRL]] IS FAKE NEWS!!!111}} | ||
[[File:CampaignOver.jpg|thumb|right|The [[2016 Presidential Election]] had a lot of fake news]] | {{withjews|fake news}} | ||
'''Fake | [[File:CampaignOver.jpg|300px|thumb|right|The [[2016 Presidential Election|2016 presidential election]] had a lot of fake news.]] | ||
[[File:Trump-fakenews.jpg|250px|thumb|[[The Donald|President Trump]] knows [[CNN|fake news]] when he sees it.]] | |||
'''Fake news'''{{jew}}, formerly known as ''[[The Daily Show]]'', is [[Duh|news that is fake]], oddly enough. Thanks to the [[Interweb]]s, fake news has taken over the world, just like [[Mark Twain|Samuel Langhorne Clemens]] predicted. [[Before the Internets]], Clemens famously said that fake news can travel the world and [[cuck|fuck your wife]] while [[you]] are still putting your boots on. He wasn't talking about you though, everyone knows [[you]] are [[dying alone]]. For example, telling people you have a [[girlfriend]] is fake news. | |||
Fake | Fake news is a [[lulzy]] entity that spreads like the [[Zika]] virus. Determining the [[Jew|source]] of fake news is often [[problematic]], as difficult as figuring out who a [[fag]] on [[Grindr]] got [[AIDS]] up his [[Goatse|butthole]] from. | ||
Despite reports that only [[Jews|some people]] make fake news, everyone in the history of the world is guilty of making fake news. Telling people someone loves you is fake news. Telling people you have a reason to live is fake news. Telling people you're happy and love your life is fake news. [[Lies]] are fake news. [[Facebook|Fakebook]] and [[Instagram]] is the fake news that people show the world in order to [[troll]] people into believing they have their shit together. Social life in general consists almost entirely of fake news. Telling people you like them is fake news. Telling people you're glad to see them is fake news. Laughing at people's jokes is fake news. When a [[pet]] acts like it loves you and isn't just using you for [[food]], that too is fake news. Your phony username is fake news. | Despite reports that only [[Jews|some people]] make fake news, everyone in the history of the world is guilty of making fake news. Telling people someone loves you is fake news. Telling people you have a reason to live is fake news. Telling people you're happy and love your life is fake news. [[Lies]] are fake news. [[Facebook|Fakebook]] and [[Instagram]] is the fake news that people show the world in order to [[troll]] people into believing they have their shit together. Social life in general consists almost entirely of fake news. Telling people you like them is fake news. Telling people you're glad to see them is fake news. Laughing at people's jokes is fake news. When a [[pet]] acts like it loves you and isn't just using you for [[food]], that too is fake news. Your phony username is fake news. | ||
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==Invention== | ==Invention== | ||
[[File: | {{main|The Jews and Their Lies}} | ||
Fake | [[File:The jewish press - front page (gulf war) february 21, 1991.gif|right|220px|thumb|The Jews and their lies: nevar forget.]] | ||
Fake news was invented in [[at least 100]] BC by [[Jews]], with the popular fake news publication the [[Torah]], known for its tagline "With Jews you fake news," and for popularizing the [[capitalism|worship]] of [[shekels|money]]. That book of fake news by Jews had several controversial and anti-Semitic spinoffs, like The [[Bible]] and the [[Koran]]. | |||
But it's [[the current year]], so how is fake news still a thing? [[Comedy Central]] needed a token black guy to host a show after [[Dave Chappelle]] went to [[Africa]] to find Paul Mooney's parents, but he found a South African instead because all of the really [[black people]] scared him and he moved back to Amerifat be a [[marijuana]] farmer in [[Ohio]]. | Carrying on the long Jewish tradition of fake news, ''The Daily Show'' debuted in 1996 with asexual icon and Sportscenter host Craig Kilborn, but we all know his fake news was written by Jews. Jonathan Stuart Leibowitz took over the show in 1999 before [[Y2K]], long before his [[Twitter]] war with [[The Donald]] in the middle of the night. During Leibowitz's tenure, many [[redundant|Hollywood Jews]] gave his fake news show written by Jews many trophies made with [[Jew gold]]. In 2015, Leibowitz was replaced with an [[unfunny]] black guy from [[South Africa]] simply because he had the Jewish name Noah [[diversity|and was black]]. | ||
But it's [[the current year]], so how is fake news still a thing? [[Comedy Central]] needed a token black guy to host a show after [[Dave Chappelle]] went to [[Africa]] to find Paul Mooney's parents, but he found a South African instead because all of the really [[black people]] scared him and he moved back to Amerifat to be a [[marijuana]] farmer in [[Ohio]]. | |||
{{clear}} | {{clear}} | ||
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===In the military=== | ===In the military=== | ||
[[File:Typicalmarine.jpg|thumb|right| | [[File:Typicalmarine.jpg|200px|thumb|right|Nice camo]] | ||
Some [[Greek]] [[faggot]] supposedly said the first casualty of [[war]] is [[truth]]. However, that itself was fake news, he didn't say that. Naturally, war depends on fake news. [[Military|Militaries]] have used fake news since the oldest of [[old meme]]s. The Trojan Horse was fake news. Flying a false flag was fake news and a [[troll|ruse]] of war used by [[Piracy|pirate ships]] and in naval warfare. Camouflage is fake news. Landmines and booby traps are fake news. [[Che Guevara|Guerrilla warfare]] uses fake news. [[Propaganda]], misinformation, and disinformation is fake news. Denial campaigns use fake news. Psyops and [[Infowars|information warfare]] use fake news. Ambushes often depend on fake news. [[Troll|Phony communications]] is fake news. [[Spies]] and [[James Bond|secret agents]] often use fake news. Dummy weapons or vehicles or buildings are fake news. Fake guns that get [[black]] kids shot by [[cop]]s are fake news. | Some [[Greek]] [[faggot]] supposedly said the first casualty of [[war]] is [[truth]]. However, that itself was fake news, he didn't say that. Naturally, war depends on fake news. [[Military|Militaries]] have used fake news since the oldest of [[old meme]]s. The Trojan Horse was fake news. Flying a false flag was fake news and a [[troll|ruse]] of war used by [[Piracy|pirate ships]] and in naval warfare. Camouflage is fake news. Landmines and booby traps are fake news. [[Che Guevara|Guerrilla warfare]] uses fake news. [[Propaganda]], misinformation, and disinformation is fake news. Denial campaigns use fake news. Psyops and [[Infowars|information warfare]] use fake news. Ambushes often depend on fake news. [[Troll|Phony communications]] is fake news. [[Spies]] and [[James Bond|secret agents]] often use fake news. Dummy weapons or vehicles or buildings are fake news. Fake guns that get [[black]] kids shot by [[cop]]s are fake news. | ||
One ancient [[Chinese]] secret is The Art of War, with chapter six about illusion and reality, and chapter thirteen about spies and espionage. [[Fgas|Deception]] is fake news. The Art of War is widely used by the [[Putin|KGB]], [[capitalism|corporations]], [[sport]]s coaches, and in e-sports. | One ancient [[Chinese]] secret is ''The Art of War'', with chapter six about illusion and reality, and chapter thirteen about spies and espionage. [[Fgas|Deception]] is fake news. ''The Art of War'' is widely used by the [[Putin|KGB]], [[capitalism|corporations]], [[sport]]s coaches, and in e-sports. | ||
{{quote|All warfare is based on deception. Hence, when we are able to attack, we must seem unable; when using our forces, we must appear inactive; when we are near, we must make the enemy believe we are far away; when far away, we must make him believe we are near.|Sun Tzu, on the art of fake news}} | {{quote|All warfare is based on deception. Hence, when we are able to attack, we must seem unable; when using our forces, we must appear inactive; when we are near, we must make the enemy believe we are far away; when far away, we must make him believe we are near.|Sun Tzu, on the art of fake news}} | ||
===In the wild=== | ===In the wild=== | ||
Even [[animal]]s make fake news. Mimicry is fake news. Camouflage is fake news. [[Cephalopods]], like [[ | Even [[animal]]s make fake news. Mimicry is fake news. Camouflage is fake news. [[Cephalopods]], like [[Octopus|octopussies]] and [[tentacle|squids]] and cuttlefish, and [[chameleon]]s are perhaps the most striking examples of fake news in the wild kingdom. Other fake news animals include walking sticks, walking leaves, flounders, leopards, etc. Fake news in the wild also includes alligators and [[hippo]]s hiding in water holes, [[spiders]], big [[cat]]s [[Pokémon|hiding in tall grass]], etc. | ||
===In business=== | ===In business=== | ||
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===In print=== | ===In print=== | ||
Sources say the oldest fake news magazine in the world was invented by [[Polandball]] in 1816, known as [[Truth|"Gutter Rag News"]] | Sources say the oldest fake news magazine in the world was invented by [[Polandball]] in 1816, known as [[Truth|"Gutter Rag News,"]] in order to use fake news to dispel the truth behind Pollack jokes. Other [[Old media|dead tree fake news magazines]] that [[Shit nobody cares about|nobody cares about]] include ''[[France|La Caricature]]'' in 1830, ''[[UK|Punch]]'' in 1841, ''[[UK|Fun]]'' in 1861, ''The [[Yale]] Record'' in 1872, ''The [[Harvard]] Lampoon'' in 1876, ''[[Private Eye]]'' in 1961, ''[[Charlie Hebdo]]'' in 1969, ''Weekly World News'' in 1979, ''[[US|Spy]]'' in 1986, ''[[The Onion]]'' in 1988, and ''[[UK|The Oxymoron]]'' in 2007. Although often accused of spreading fake news, [[tabloid]]s are actually reliable sources. ''Weekly World News'' is notable for warning the public about the genetic freak, Bat Boy. | ||
[[File:Batboy_Steals_MINI.jpg|center|thumb]] | [[File:Batboy_Steals_MINI.jpg|center|thumb]] | ||
The granddaddy of fake news magazines made by Jews is | The granddaddy of fake news magazines made by Jews is [[MAD magazine]] which began as a comic book for EC Comics (publishers of the original Tales From the Crypt comics) in 1952 and was written and edited by Brooklyn Jew Harvey Kurtzman, back when "comic book" meant funny paper rather than capeshit written by Jews. [[Old meme|Alfred E. Neuman]], itself a variant of an older "Me Worry?" meme, appeared on the cover in December 1956 as a write-in candidate for president, preceding [[Deez Nuts]] and Giant Meteor by [[Fact|six decades]]. [[Some argue]] ''MAD'' magazine was the original [[redpill]] in the 1950s, setting the formula for all Amerifat satire that came after. Although, the [[alt-right]] may argue it was the original blue pill, as a vehicle for Jews to spread degeneracy throughout society which culminated in [[hippies]] and [[feminism]] and eventually the [[SJW|social justice warrior]]. ''MAD'' magazine promoted [[Penn and Teller|skepticism]] of everything, and influenced [[The Simpsons|Harry Shearer]], [[Monty Python|Terry Gilliam]], [[Robert Crumb]] and all underground comix, [[Weird Al]], even [[Roger Ebert|Roger "Jaws No More" Ebert]]. By reading ED, [[you]] are a piece of shit that owes ''MAD'' magazine a [[Hahaha no|debt of gratitude]]. In its 400th issue, it said "The second issue of ''MAD'' goes on sale on December 9, 1952. On December 11, the first-ever letter complaining that ''MAD'' 'just isn't as funny and original like it used to be' arrives." ''MAD'' was the original "[[B|/b/]] was [[When /b/ was good|never good]]." ''MAD'' magazine preceded [[Fark]] and [[Something Awful]] and [[4chan]] by decades, until loaning its brand to a [[MAD tv|TV show]] that had nothing to do with it. | ||
The | ''The Harvard Lampoon'' and its writers are also notable for spawning a massive shitload of fake news. ''The National Lampoon Radio Hour'' featured The Six-Fingered Man, Mr. Burns, and Chevy Chase. | ||
===In television=== | ===In television=== | ||
Harvard Lampoon veterans went on to write for [[unfunny|Saturday Night Live, The Simpsons, Beavis and | [[File:I_cant_believe_is_the_current_year.jpg|thumb|right|200px|John Oliver hosts the fake news show [[The Current Year]]]] | ||
''Harvard Lampoon'' veterans went on to write for [[unfunny|''Saturday Night Live'', ''The Simpsons'', ''Beavis and Butt-Head'', ''Futurama'', ''Late Night with David Letterman'', ''Seinfeld'', ''Friends'', ''NewsRadio'', ''The Office'', ''30 Rock'', ''Parks and Recreation'', and at least four Chevy Chase vacation movies]]. | |||
''Weekend Update'' is a fake news program that has aired in Amerifat from the beginning of ''[[Saturday Night Live]]'' in 1975, created by [[Jew|Lorne Michaels]]. ''SNL'' has received at least fifty Jew gold statues over the years. ''Weekend Update's'' first fake news anchor Chevy Chase set a trend for fake news anchors going on to get their own fake news talk shows. The show's fake news reporters have included: [[shit nobody cares about|Chevy Chase, Jane Curtin, Buck Henry, Dan "Crystal Skull" Aykroyd, Bill Murray, Charles Rocket, Gail Matthius, Jonathan Lear, Brian Doyle-Murray, Mary Gross, Christine Ebersole, Brad Hall, Billy Crystal, Joe Piscopo, Christopher Guest, Dennis Miller, Kevin Nealon, Norm Macdonald, Colin Quinn, Jimmy Fallon, Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Horatio Sanz, Seth Meyers, Cecily Strong, Colin Jost, and Michael Che]]. Fake news anchor [[Norm Macdonald]] would begin the segment by saying "I'm Norm Macdonald, and now the fake news." [[Jimmy Fallon]] got his own fake news talk show, and so did [[Jew|Seth Meyers]]. Former ''SNL'' writer [[Conan O'Brien]] also got his own fake news talk show, like three different times. Protip: The fake news show ''Weekend Update'' suggested that [[PizzaGate]] was invented by [[crackhead]]s, but that was just [[copypasta]] from the fake news site ''The New York Times''. | |||
With fake news reporter Stephen Colbert getting his own fake news talk show, late night talk shows in Amerifat are dominated by fake news written by Jews. [[Britbong]]s like Craig "[[Mythbusters|Robot Skeleton Pal]]" Ferguson and James "Carpool Karaoke" Corden have also tried their hand at fake news in Amerilard, but nobody gives a shit. | |||
Many people who worked on the fake news show ''The Daily Show'' went on to have their very own fake news shows. After appearing on ''The Dana Carvey Show'' which featured an impersonation of [[Bill Clinton]] [[Srsly|breastfeeding several puppies or some shit]], Stephen Colbert joined the fake news show ''The Daily Show'', before getting his own fake news show ''[[The Colbert Report]]'', before getting his own fake news show ''The Late Show''. John Oliver got the fake news show ''Last Week Tonight with John Oliver''. Samantha Bee got the fake news show ''[[Nude|Full Frontal]]''. Due to [[White guilt|underrepresentation]], even Larry Wilmore got the fake news program ''The Nightly Show with Larry Wilmore'' before it was canceled. | |||
Many people who worked on the fake news show | |||
[[Joe Rogan]] used to work on the fake news show NewsRadio before he went all [[marijuana|DUDE WEED LMAO]]. Other fake news shows include: [[ | [[Joe Rogan]] used to work on the fake news show ''NewsRadio'' before he went all [[marijuana|DUDE WEED LMAO]]. Other fake news shows include: ''[[Shit nobody cares about|Murphy Brown]]'', ''The Newsroom'', ''[[Australia|The Weekly]]'', ''[[Canada|The Beaverton]]'', ''[[Germany|heute-show]]'', ''[[Pakistan|Banana News Network]]'', ''[[UK|Have I Got News For You]]'', and ''[[UK|Mock the Week]]''. | ||
===On the Internets=== | ===On the Internets=== | ||
{{spoiler|[[Hillary|HILLARY]] WARNS OF FAKE NEWS EPIDEMIC AFTER TOP DONOR [[Israel|HAIM SABAN]] BOUGHT A STAKE IN FAKE NEWS WEBSITE THE ONION}} | {{spoiler|[[Hillary|HILLARY]] WARNS OF FAKE NEWS EPIDEMIC AFTER TOP DONOR [[Israel|HAIM SABAN]] BOUGHT A STAKE IN FAKE NEWS WEBSITE THE ONION}} | ||
[[File: | [[File:"what's next for hillary clinton?" - the onion, february 4, 2017.png|thumb|right|200px|''"The Onion - Fair and Balanced"'']] | ||
Fake News has had a long presence on the Internets, going back at least to the creation of [[alt.religion.scientology]] on [[newsgroup]]s. After [[Eternal September]] and the [[WWW|world wide web]] was invented, fake news really took off. Perhaps the most notable fake news website is | Fake News has had a long presence on the Internets, going back at least to the creation of [[alt.religion.scientology]] on [[newsgroup]]s. After [[Eternal September]] and the [[WWW|world wide web]] was invented, fake news really took off. | ||
Perhaps the most notable fake news website is ''The Onion'', started in 1996. In early [[2016]], 40% of ''The Onion'' was bought by [[Mexico|Univision]], headquartered in [[New York City]] and co-owned by [[Hillary Clinton]]'s top donor [[Israel]]i [[Zionist]] Haim [[Power Rangers|Saban]]. Saban and his wife have [[Truth|donated]] [[over 9000]] dollars to Hillary's campaigns and to the Clinton Foundation, where Cheryl Saban sits, which explains newer [[unfunny|headlines]] such as "Female Presidential Candidate Who Was United States Senator, Secretary Of State Told To Be More Inspiring." | |||
Other [[shit nobody cares about|notable fake news websites]] include Private Eye in 1996, [[Landover Baptist Church]] in 1998, Borowitz Report in 2001, [[Cracked]] in 2007, Weekly World News in 2009, | Other [[shit nobody cares about|notable fake news websites]] include [[Private Eye]] in 1996, [[Landover Baptist Church]] in 1998, Borowitz Report in 2001, [[Cracked]] in 2007, Weekly World News in 2009, [[The Onion|ClickHole]] in 2014 and [[World News Daily Report]], which has existed since 2013. | ||
[[Clickbait]] is usually fake news. Also everything on [[Facebook]] run by [[Mark Zuckerberg]]. [[YouTube]] and [[Twitter]] also have fake news, if you can believe it, just like most sites that feature [[UGC]]. | [[Clickbait]] is usually fake news. Also everything on [[Facebook]] run by [[Mark Zuckerberg]]. [[YouTube]] and [[Twitter]] also have fake news, if you can believe it, just like most sites that feature [[UGC]]. But fear not! Liberal democracy's patron saint, trillionaire [[George Soros|George Soros,]] has stepped in and provided [[Jewgold|vast sums of money]] to help Fecesbook [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4041910/Clinton-mega-donor-George-Soros-leads-line-liberal-billionaires-funding-Facebook-s-fake-news-fact-checker.html stem the tide of fake news.] Because, you know, Zuckerberg got a parking ticket this month and so things were a bit tight and obviously he couldn't be expected to cover internal corporate expenditure all on his own. | ||
<br><br> | |||
<center> | |||
{{frame|[[File:Soros-zuckerberg jew "anti-fake news" scheme graphic.png|500px|thumb|center|Yes, between them (((these men))) will ensure you get [[Israeli|trustworthy]] [[Propaganda|news]]]]|border=gold|background=gold}} | |||
<br> | |||
{{frame|{{quote|Controlling the world's sources of news, [the Jew] can always prepare the minds of the people for its next move. The greatest exposure yet to be made is the way that news is manufactured and the way in which the mind of whole nations is molded for a purpose. When the powerful Jew is at last traced and his hand revealed, then comes the ready cry of persecution and it echoes through the world press.|Henry Ford, [https://archive.org/stream/TheInternationalJew/InternationalJew_djvu.txt ''The International Jew'', chapter two]}}|border=gold|background=white}} | |||
</center> | |||
<br> | |||
===In religion=== | ===In religion=== | ||
Besides [[Judaism|all]] the [[Christianity|fake news]] [[Islam|religions]] that spawn from [[Jew|Abraham]], fake news is a feature of all [[religion]]s, especially [[Scientology]]. | Besides [[Judaism|all]] the [[Christianity|fake news]] [[Islam|religions]] that spawn from [[Jew|Abraham]], fake news is a feature of all [[religion]]s, especially [[Scientology]]. | ||
Some [[Injuns|religions]] feature a "trickster god" | Some [[Injuns|religions]] feature a "trickster god," where the god is a [[troll|rusemaster]] who torments humanity with fake news. | ||
{{quote|Upon realizing that reality itself is fake news, you will be enlightened. [[Nirvana]] is the state of being free of fake news.|Guatama [[Buddha]], in the Diamond Sutra}} | {{quote|Upon realizing that reality itself is fake news, you will be enlightened. [[Nirvana]] is the state of being free of fake news.|Guatama [[Buddha]], in the Diamond Sutra}} | ||
In [[Islam]], crowds do enjoy fake news all day long. They accept lies and never question anything as long as it does sound [[good]]. Most fake news media outlets in Islam are owned by [http://www.alwaleed.com.sa Saudi wannabe-King PlayBoy Prince](who owns [[Fox News]] already) and off-spring royals from [[Dubai|UAE]]. | |||
<center><youtube>Qus1VLdFyhI</youtube> <youtube>qu6l7q6bLEs</youtube><br> | |||
''[[Jew]] Arabs owners of fake news troll viewers with more fake news.''</center> | |||
==List of things that are fake news== | ==List of things that are fake news== | ||
[[File:Caitlyn_Jenner.jpg|200px|thumb|right]] | |||
*[[You]] are loved | *[[You]] are loved | ||
*People like you and like to be around you | *People like you and like to be around you | ||
*Your dad works for [[Nintendo]] | *Your dad works for [[Nintendo]] | ||
*Your dad can beat up my dad | *Your dad can beat up my dad | ||
*[[You]] | *[[You]] having a bigger [[penis]] than anyone | ||
*You are not a [[retard]] | *You are not a [[retard]] | ||
*[[Nazi|The Reichstag fire]] | *[[Nazi|The Reichstag fire]] | ||
*Colin Powell saying [[Iraq]] had [[WMD]] (the yellow[[cake]] was a lie) | *Colin Powell saying [[Iraq]] had [[WMD]] (the yellow[[cake]] was a lie) | ||
*The Gulf of Tonkin incident leading to the [[Vietnam War]] with [[Japan]] | *The Gulf of Tonkin incident leading to the [[Vietnam War]] with [[Japan]] | ||
*Brian Williams of NBC lying about shit and getting replaced with Lester Holt | |||
*[[Fashion]] | |||
*Makeup | |||
*[[Fat Girl Angle Shot]] | |||
*Breast [[implants]] | |||
*[[Plastic Surgery|Plastic surgery]] | |||
*[[Zionist|Sharjah Ruler]] caring and giving [[terrorism|explosive]] shit about [[Children|children]] by passing laws that protect [[Child Abuse|children]] while he pimps on [[kids]] right this moment to his [[Jewish]] friends. | |||
*That thing that [[Hillary Clinton]] ranted about in her first speech after the [[2016 Presidential Election|2016 presidential election]] where she lost to [[The Donald]] | |||
*[[Transgender]]ism | |||
*[[Trap]]s | |||
*[[Crossdresser|Cross-dressing]] | |||
*Clothes | |||
*"Handles" | |||
*[[Wikipedia Hoaxes|Wikipedia hoaxes]] | |||
*[[Conspiracy#Famous_Conspiracy_Theories|Famous conspiracy theories]] | *[[Conspiracy#Famous_Conspiracy_Theories|Famous conspiracy theories]] | ||
*[[GamerGate]] are [[Zoe Quinn|woman]]-hating ISIS terrorists. | |||
==Gallery== | ==Gallery== | ||
<center><gallery> | <br> | ||
File: | <center> | ||
File: | {{frame|<gallery perrow=4> | ||
</gallery></center> | File:Sinking uss maine headline february 1898.jpg|Spanish terrorists spark war (February 1898) | ||
File:Titanic completes maiden voyage, christian science monitor 15 apr 1912.jpg|Titanic completes maiden voyage (April 1912) | |||
File:Saint george witnessed by WWI british troops, new york times 17 oct 1915.jpg|Miracle witnessed on battlefield (October 1915) | |||
File:'german corpse factory' WWI propaganda Sheffield Evening Telegraph 18 Apr 1917.jpg|Holocaust begins in Germany (April 1917) | |||
File:Hitler tamed by prison NYT 14 oct 1924.jpg|Shamed German troublemaker seeks obscurity (October 1924) | |||
File:Neville chamberlain "peace in our time" daily mail 1 oct 1938.jpg|World War II averted (October 1938) | |||
File:Fake news about Orson Welles's "War of the Worlds" (story 31 oct 1938).jpg|War with Mars declared (October 1938) | |||
File:Los Angeles Examiner “War Extra” of Feb. 25, 1942.gif|Axis powers invade California (February 1942) | |||
File:Flying saucer captured, Roswell Daily Record 8 jul 1947.jpg|Contact established with space aliens (July 1947) | |||
File:Dewey beats truman headline 3 nov 1948.jpg|President Dewey elected (November 1948) | |||
File:The sunday times begins serialization of 'the hitler diaries' 24 apr 1983.jpg|Hitler's secret diary published (April 1983) | |||
File:Rupert murdoch the sun hillsborough disaster headline 19 April 1989.png|Football fans kill 96 and desecrate their corpses (April 1989) | |||
File:"millennium bug" british government public advisory billboard 1999.jpg|Global civilisation collapses (January 2000) | |||
File:Daily mirror iraqi abuse by british troops 2 may 2004.jpg|British soldiers piss on Iraqis (May 2004) | |||
File:Amanda knox conviction upheld 3 oct 2011.png|[[Foxy Knoxy|Amanda Knox]] guilty {{archive|F13lJ|(October 2011)}} | |||
File:Michael sheen fake news montage dec 2016.png|Michael Sheen quits (December 2016) | |||
</gallery>|border=red|background=yellow}} | |||
</center> | |||
<br> | |||
==Videos== | |||
<center><youtube>2RqglwnF4AI</youtube></center> | |||
==Quotes== | |||
{{quote|Fake news is now on the verge of getting someone killed.|[[Mick|Lawrence O'Donnell]], after the [[PizzaGate]] gunman either shot or didn't shoot any bullets at Comet Ping Pong}} | |||
<center> | |||
{{frame|{{morphquote|morphquote|background-color: white; margin: auto;|font-weight: bold; | |||
|Of all the content on [[Facebook]], more than 99% of what people see is fake news and hoaxes.|[[YHBT|Mark Zuckerberg]] | |||
|Of all the content on [[Facebook]], more than 99% of what people see is authentic. Only a very small amount is fake news and hoaxes.|[[Lies|Mark Zuckerberg]]|}}|border=gold|background=gold}} | |||
</center> | |||
==See also== | ==See also== | ||
* | [[File:Jew zuckerberg "fake news" FB 15 December 2016 decoded by experts.png|250px|thumb|right|Translated from E-Hebrew]] | ||
*[[ | *[[BuzzFeed]] | ||
*[[ | *[[Clickbait]] | ||
*[[Cloward Piven Strategy]] | |||
*''[[The Daily Show]]'' | |||
*[[Facebook]] | *[[Facebook]] | ||
*[[Hypernormalization]] | |||
*[[Internets]] | *[[Internets]] | ||
*''[[Mein Kampf]]'' - A book universally hated by all fake news. | |||
*[[Old media]] | |||
*''[[Private Eye]]'' | |||
*[[Bad Vlad|Putin, Vlad the -]] | |||
*[[Video Game Journalism|Video game journalism]] | |||
*[[World News Daily Report]] | |||
{{clear}} | |||
==External links== | ==External links== | ||
[[File:Fake_news_100_years_ago.jpg|thumb|right|220px|"Stand aside! Guardians of democracy coming through!"]] | |||
*[https://www.google.com The Google], find fake news here | *[https://www.google.com The Google], find fake news here | ||
*[[The Guardian]] is utterly caught out deliberately distorting and misquoting [[Julian Assange]] to make it seem like he works for [[Putin]] but doesn't correct the article ((((by Ben Jacobs))) [[ISWYDT|until it's already gone viral on social media]] [https://theintercept.com/2016/12/29/the-guardians-summary-of-julian-assanges-interview-went-viral-and-was-completely-false/] (Dec 29, 2016) | |||
*[[Amazon.com|''The Washington Post'']] inflates a virus detected on a single offline laptop in Vermont into a full-scale Russian attack on the local electricity network, [[ISWYDT|without actually bothering to contact the power companies to check whether it's true.]] (December 30, 2016) [http://www.forbes.com/sites/kalevleetaru/2017/01/01/fake-news-and-how-the-washington-post-rewrote-its-story-on-russian-hacking-of-the-power-grid/amp/][https://theintercept.com/2017/01/04/washpost-is-richly-rewarded-for-false-news-about-russia-threat-while-public-is-deceived/] | |||
*[http://newslines.org/blog/lets-talk-about-fake-news/ A short article] about [[old media|the real "fake news"]] | |||
*Wikipedia is in the vanguard of online censorship with [http://www.forbes.com/sites/kalevleetaru/2017/02/10/what-wikipedias-daily-mail-ban-tells-us-about-the-future-of-online-censorship/#17a525bd5c36 its ban] of ''[[The Daily Mail]]'' | |||
* [https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2018/07/facebook-says-infowars-valid-opinion-and-analysis-but-what-about-the-martian-slave-colony.html (((Facebook says Alex Jones is a reliable source of non-fake news)))] (Archived: {{archive|7GlEI|1}} {{wayback|https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2018/07/facebook-says-infowars-valid-opinion-and-analysis-but-what-about-the-martian-slave-colony.html|title=2}}) | |||
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{{Timeline|Featured article December 14 & December 15, [[2016]]|[[Oliver D. Smith Brothers]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Pizzagate]]}} | |||
{{timeline|Featured article November 28 & November 29, [[2017]]|[[Sweden]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Pet Shaming]]}} | |||
[[Category:2016]] | [[Category:2016]] |
Latest revision as of 06:41, 7 April 2022
WARNING: With Jews, fake news! |
Fake news✡, formerly known as The Daily Show, is news that is fake, oddly enough. Thanks to the Interwebs, fake news has taken over the world, just like Samuel Langhorne Clemens predicted. Before the Internets, Clemens famously said that fake news can travel the world and fuck your wife while you are still putting your boots on. He wasn't talking about you though, everyone knows you are dying alone. For example, telling people you have a girlfriend is fake news.
Fake news is a lulzy entity that spreads like the Zika virus. Determining the source of fake news is often problematic, as difficult as figuring out who a fag on Grindr got AIDS up his butthole from.
Despite reports that only some people make fake news, everyone in the history of the world is guilty of making fake news. Telling people someone loves you is fake news. Telling people you have a reason to live is fake news. Telling people you're happy and love your life is fake news. Lies are fake news. Fakebook and Instagram is the fake news that people show the world in order to troll people into believing they have their shit together. Social life in general consists almost entirely of fake news. Telling people you like them is fake news. Telling people you're glad to see them is fake news. Laughing at people's jokes is fake news. When a pet acts like it loves you and isn't just using you for food, that too is fake news. Your phony username is fake news.
Since you are a phony and a fraud and your life is built upon a pack of lies, if you get the chance you should probably kill yourself kthx.
Invention
Moar info: The Jews and Their Lies.
Fake news was invented in at least 100 BC by Jews, with the popular fake news publication the Torah, known for its tagline "With Jews you fake news," and for popularizing the worship of money. That book of fake news by Jews had several controversial and anti-Semitic spinoffs, like The Bible and the Koran.
Carrying on the long Jewish tradition of fake news, The Daily Show debuted in 1996 with asexual icon and Sportscenter host Craig Kilborn, but we all know his fake news was written by Jews. Jonathan Stuart Leibowitz took over the show in 1999 before Y2K, long before his Twitter war with The Donald in the middle of the night. During Leibowitz's tenure, many Hollywood Jews gave his fake news show written by Jews many trophies made with Jew gold. In 2015, Leibowitz was replaced with an unfunny black guy from South Africa simply because he had the Jewish name Noah and was black.
But it's the current year, so how is fake news still a thing? Comedy Central needed a token black guy to host a show after Dave Chappelle went to Africa to find Paul Mooney's parents, but he found a South African instead because all of the really black people scared him and he moved back to Amerifat to be a marijuana farmer in Ohio.
History of fake news
Besides the King James Bible and the Koran, history is full of fake news. Some argue that the alphabet was invented for the sole purpose of spreading fake news. That's why other written languages that you don't speak all look like fake news.
In the military
Some Greek faggot supposedly said the first casualty of war is truth. However, that itself was fake news, he didn't say that. Naturally, war depends on fake news. Militaries have used fake news since the oldest of old memes. The Trojan Horse was fake news. Flying a false flag was fake news and a ruse of war used by pirate ships and in naval warfare. Camouflage is fake news. Landmines and booby traps are fake news. Guerrilla warfare uses fake news. Propaganda, misinformation, and disinformation is fake news. Denial campaigns use fake news. Psyops and information warfare use fake news. Ambushes often depend on fake news. Phony communications is fake news. Spies and secret agents often use fake news. Dummy weapons or vehicles or buildings are fake news. Fake guns that get black kids shot by cops are fake news.
One ancient Chinese secret is The Art of War, with chapter six about illusion and reality, and chapter thirteen about spies and espionage. Deception is fake news. The Art of War is widely used by the KGB, corporations, sports coaches, and in e-sports.
—Sun Tzu, on the art of fake news |
In the wild
Even animals make fake news. Mimicry is fake news. Camouflage is fake news. Cephalopods, like octopussies and squids and cuttlefish, and chameleons are perhaps the most striking examples of fake news in the wild kingdom. Other fake news animals include walking sticks, walking leaves, flounders, leopards, etc. Fake news in the wild also includes alligators and hippos hiding in water holes, spiders, big cats hiding in tall grass, etc.
In business
Advertising is fake news. Fine print enables fake news. Product placement in shows is fake news.
In print
Sources say the oldest fake news magazine in the world was invented by Polandball in 1816, known as "Gutter Rag News," in order to use fake news to dispel the truth behind Pollack jokes. Other dead tree fake news magazines that nobody cares about include La Caricature in 1830, Punch in 1841, Fun in 1861, The Yale Record in 1872, The Harvard Lampoon in 1876, Private Eye in 1961, Charlie Hebdo in 1969, Weekly World News in 1979, Spy in 1986, The Onion in 1988, and The Oxymoron in 2007. Although often accused of spreading fake news, tabloids are actually reliable sources. Weekly World News is notable for warning the public about the genetic freak, Bat Boy.
The granddaddy of fake news magazines made by Jews is MAD magazine which began as a comic book for EC Comics (publishers of the original Tales From the Crypt comics) in 1952 and was written and edited by Brooklyn Jew Harvey Kurtzman, back when "comic book" meant funny paper rather than capeshit written by Jews. Alfred E. Neuman, itself a variant of an older "Me Worry?" meme, appeared on the cover in December 1956 as a write-in candidate for president, preceding Deez Nuts and Giant Meteor by six decades. Some argue MAD magazine was the original redpill in the 1950s, setting the formula for all Amerifat satire that came after. Although, the alt-right may argue it was the original blue pill, as a vehicle for Jews to spread degeneracy throughout society which culminated in hippies and feminism and eventually the social justice warrior. MAD magazine promoted skepticism of everything, and influenced Harry Shearer, Terry Gilliam, Robert Crumb and all underground comix, Weird Al, even Roger "Jaws No More" Ebert. By reading ED, you are a piece of shit that owes MAD magazine a debt of gratitude. In its 400th issue, it said "The second issue of MAD goes on sale on December 9, 1952. On December 11, the first-ever letter complaining that MAD 'just isn't as funny and original like it used to be' arrives." MAD was the original "/b/ was never good." MAD magazine preceded Fark and Something Awful and 4chan by decades, until loaning its brand to a TV show that had nothing to do with it.
The Harvard Lampoon and its writers are also notable for spawning a massive shitload of fake news. The National Lampoon Radio Hour featured The Six-Fingered Man, Mr. Burns, and Chevy Chase.
In television
Harvard Lampoon veterans went on to write for Saturday Night Live, The Simpsons, Beavis and Butt-Head, Futurama, Late Night with David Letterman, Seinfeld, Friends, NewsRadio, The Office, 30 Rock, Parks and Recreation, and at least four Chevy Chase vacation movies.
Weekend Update is a fake news program that has aired in Amerifat from the beginning of Saturday Night Live in 1975, created by Lorne Michaels. SNL has received at least fifty Jew gold statues over the years. Weekend Update's first fake news anchor Chevy Chase set a trend for fake news anchors going on to get their own fake news talk shows. The show's fake news reporters have included: Chevy Chase, Jane Curtin, Buck Henry, Dan "Crystal Skull" Aykroyd, Bill Murray, Charles Rocket, Gail Matthius, Jonathan Lear, Brian Doyle-Murray, Mary Gross, Christine Ebersole, Brad Hall, Billy Crystal, Joe Piscopo, Christopher Guest, Dennis Miller, Kevin Nealon, Norm Macdonald, Colin Quinn, Jimmy Fallon, Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Horatio Sanz, Seth Meyers, Cecily Strong, Colin Jost, and Michael Che. Fake news anchor Norm Macdonald would begin the segment by saying "I'm Norm Macdonald, and now the fake news." Jimmy Fallon got his own fake news talk show, and so did Seth Meyers. Former SNL writer Conan O'Brien also got his own fake news talk show, like three different times. Protip: The fake news show Weekend Update suggested that PizzaGate was invented by crackheads, but that was just copypasta from the fake news site The New York Times.
With fake news reporter Stephen Colbert getting his own fake news talk show, late night talk shows in Amerifat are dominated by fake news written by Jews. Britbongs like Craig "Robot Skeleton Pal" Ferguson and James "Carpool Karaoke" Corden have also tried their hand at fake news in Amerilard, but nobody gives a shit.
Many people who worked on the fake news show The Daily Show went on to have their very own fake news shows. After appearing on The Dana Carvey Show which featured an impersonation of Bill Clinton breastfeeding several puppies or some shit, Stephen Colbert joined the fake news show The Daily Show, before getting his own fake news show The Colbert Report, before getting his own fake news show The Late Show. John Oliver got the fake news show Last Week Tonight with John Oliver. Samantha Bee got the fake news show Full Frontal. Due to underrepresentation, even Larry Wilmore got the fake news program The Nightly Show with Larry Wilmore before it was canceled.
Joe Rogan used to work on the fake news show NewsRadio before he went all DUDE WEED LMAO. Other fake news shows include: Murphy Brown, The Newsroom, The Weekly, The Beaverton, heute-show, Banana News Network, Have I Got News For You, and Mock the Week.
On the Internets
Fake News has had a long presence on the Internets, going back at least to the creation of alt.religion.scientology on newsgroups. After Eternal September and the world wide web was invented, fake news really took off.
Perhaps the most notable fake news website is The Onion, started in 1996. In early 2016, 40% of The Onion was bought by Univision, headquartered in New York City and co-owned by Hillary Clinton's top donor Israeli Zionist Haim Saban. Saban and his wife have donated over 9000 dollars to Hillary's campaigns and to the Clinton Foundation, where Cheryl Saban sits, which explains newer headlines such as "Female Presidential Candidate Who Was United States Senator, Secretary Of State Told To Be More Inspiring."
Other notable fake news websites include Private Eye in 1996, Landover Baptist Church in 1998, Borowitz Report in 2001, Cracked in 2007, Weekly World News in 2009, ClickHole in 2014 and World News Daily Report, which has existed since 2013.
Clickbait is usually fake news. Also everything on Facebook run by Mark Zuckerberg. YouTube and Twitter also have fake news, if you can believe it, just like most sites that feature UGC. But fear not! Liberal democracy's patron saint, trillionaire George Soros, has stepped in and provided vast sums of money to help Fecesbook stem the tide of fake news. Because, you know, Zuckerberg got a parking ticket this month and so things were a bit tight and obviously he couldn't be expected to cover internal corporate expenditure all on his own.
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In religion
Besides all the fake news religions that spawn from Abraham, fake news is a feature of all religions, especially Scientology.
Some religions feature a "trickster god," where the god is a rusemaster who torments humanity with fake news.
—Guatama Buddha, in the Diamond Sutra |
In Islam, crowds do enjoy fake news all day long. They accept lies and never question anything as long as it does sound good. Most fake news media outlets in Islam are owned by Saudi wannabe-King PlayBoy Prince(who owns Fox News already) and off-spring royals from UAE.
Jew Arabs owners of fake news troll viewers with more fake news.
List of things that are fake news
- You are loved
- People like you and like to be around you
- Your dad works for Nintendo
- Your dad can beat up my dad
- You having a bigger penis than anyone
- You are not a retard
- The Reichstag fire
- Colin Powell saying Iraq had WMD (the yellowcake was a lie)
- The Gulf of Tonkin incident leading to the Vietnam War with Japan
- Brian Williams of NBC lying about shit and getting replaced with Lester Holt
- Fashion
- Makeup
- Fat Girl Angle Shot
- Breast implants
- Plastic surgery
- Sharjah Ruler caring and giving explosive shit about children by passing laws that protect children while he pimps on kids right this moment to his Jewish friends.
- That thing that Hillary Clinton ranted about in her first speech after the 2016 presidential election where she lost to The Donald
- Transgenderism
- Traps
- Cross-dressing
- Clothes
- "Handles"
- Wikipedia hoaxes
- Famous conspiracy theories
- GamerGate are woman-hating ISIS terrorists.
Gallery
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Videos
Quotes
—Lawrence O'Donnell, after the PizzaGate gunman either shot or didn't shoot any bullets at Comet Ping Pong |
Previous Quote | Next Quote |
See also
- BuzzFeed
- Clickbait
- Cloward Piven Strategy
- The Daily Show
- Hypernormalization
- Internets
- Mein Kampf - A book universally hated by all fake news.
- Old media
- Private Eye
- Putin, Vlad the -
- Video game journalism
- World News Daily Report
External links
- The Google, find fake news here
- The Guardian is utterly caught out deliberately distorting and misquoting Julian Assange to make it seem like he works for Putin but doesn't correct the article ((((by Ben Jacobs))) until it's already gone viral on social media [1] (Dec 29, 2016)
- The Washington Post inflates a virus detected on a single offline laptop in Vermont into a full-scale Russian attack on the local electricity network, without actually bothering to contact the power companies to check whether it's true. (December 30, 2016) [2][3]
- A short article about the real "fake news"
- Wikipedia is in the vanguard of online censorship with its ban of The Daily Mail
- (((Facebook says Alex Jones is a reliable source of non-fake news))) (Archived: 1 2)
Fake News is part of a series on Visit the Television Portal for complete coverage. |
Fake News is part of a series on Language & Communication | |
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Languages and Dialects • Grammar, Punctuation, Spelling, Style, and Usage • Rhetorical Strategies • Poetry •
The Politics of Language and Communication • Media • Visual Rhetoric
Click topics to expand |
Fake News is part of a series on Donald Trump. You're gonna love this article, believe me. |
Featured article December 14 & December 15, 2016 | ||
Preceded by Oliver D. Smith Brothers |
Fake News | Succeeded by Pizzagate |
Featured article November 28 & November 29, 2017 | ||
Preceded by Sweden |
Fake News | Succeeded by Pet Shaming |