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Mike Tyson's Punch Out: Difference between revisions
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[[Image:You gonna get raped 2.jpg|thumb|left|175px|[[YGGR|trudat]]!]] | |||
[[Image:Punchout.jpg|thumb|right|An actual screenshot from the original release.]] | |||
'''''Mike Tyson's Punch Out''''' is the timeless tale of how a bland, emotionless [[white]] guy can brutally overcome any and all [[racist|racially offensive]] stereotype ever concieved. Coached by [[Nigga stole my bike|Al Roker]], the hero (Little Albert) uppercuts his way to become the Mismatched Weight Class [[You win the prize|Champion of the World]]! This is probably one of the easiest [[Nintendo]] games to beat ever released. Every day some NES [[fucktard]] [[fanboy]] [[nostalgia|remembers]] how sweet this game used to be and forces his little buddies to watch him play this antiquated, racist, offensive game until he gets bored and invariably moves on to reminisce about ''Little Nemo the Dream Master'' for 20 minutes. [[YTMND]] has had [[over 9000]] [[stupid]] parodies of it. black person stole my- SHUT THE FUCK UP THE FAD DIED YEARS AGO. [[Mike Tyson]] starred in it before he raped a bunch of [[16-year-old girls]] and [[Nintendo]] decided to replace him with a generic white guy who somehow wasn't [[Lowtax]]. | |||
[[ | <center>{{frame|[[File:Mike_Tyson_Punch_Out_Comic.gif|POW!]]|border=black|background=white}}</center> | ||
{{clear}} | {{clear}} | ||
== | == Character Roster == | ||
[[Image:Mike Tyson's Punchout.gif|thumb | [[Image:Mike Tyson's Punchout.gif|thumb|150px|Kill Whitey.]] | ||
[[Image:Niggergotowned.jpg|thumb|150px|The upcoming remake offers ultra-realistic PunchBlack™ action... <font size=5>☻</font>]] | |||
[[Image: | {| class="wikitable" | ||
|- | |||
'''Glass Joe''' | !Name | ||
actually stays in the ring until he's knocked out. | !Information | ||
|- | |||
'''Von Kaiser''' | |'''Glass Joe''' | ||
|[[Newfag|Unseasoned]] boxer with a record of [[LOLWUT|1-99]] (whoever lost to him deserves to be maimed, tortured, and reaped because he is terrible). His attacks consist of getting punched 10+ times and falling down. Nintendo claim he's [[French]], but we call bullshit, since he actually stays in the ring until he's knocked out. | |||
'''Piston Honda''' | |- | ||
|'''Von Kaiser''' | |||
'''Don Flamenco''' | |The closest thing to [[Hitler]] that Nintendo would allow. He has a bad heart and his super attack is [[fifty Hitler post|'Final Solution']]. | ||
|- | |||
'''King Hippo''' | |'''Piston Honda''' | ||
|[[Gook]] champion of the [[pussy|Beginners]] circuit. He attacks by utilizing some possibly illegal karate-punching. | |||
|- | |||
|'''Don Flamenco''' | |||
|Some faggot from [[Spain]]. He holds a rose in his mouth and attempts to molest you. | |||
|- | |||
|'''King Hippo''' | |||
|A fatass everybody thought was hard until they figured out his obvious [[pussy|weak spot]]. | |||
|- | |||
|'''Great Tiger''' | |||
|A [[Paki]] who spins around and attacks you with [[magic|SPESHUL MAGICZZ!!!]] then has a seizure like a [[retard]]ed monkey exposed to rapidly [[Party hard|flashing-lights]]. | |||
|- | |||
|'''Bald Bull''' | |||
|A secret [[muslim]] from Turkey. His 'Bull Charge' is pretty impressive but unfortunately it does not make up for his lack of personality... the drapes match the curtains. | |||
|- | |||
|'''Vodka Drunkenski''' | |||
|Russian [[pedophile]] who attempts to spread the joys of communism; Nintendo actually changed his name to "Soda Popinski" as they were afraid [[Concerned mother|butthurt parents]] might bawww otherwise. | |||
|- | |||
|'''Mr. Sandman''' | |||
|A negro who wants to [[ass rape|put Mac to sleep]]; attacks by being an asshole and playing the race-card. | |||
|- | |||
|'''Super Macho Man''' | |||
|[[Randy Savage|RELEASE THE BOGUS!]] | |||
|- | |||
|'''Mr. Dream''' | |||
|Nintendo's Jew tactic after dumping Tyson from the game for going on a [[rape|rampage]] so that they can [[capcom|re-release the same fucking game a million times]] and inadvertantly proving once and for all that the White-man will always be the dominant race. | |||
|} | |||
''' | <br /> | ||
<center>'''Secret Cheat:''' ↑, ↑, ↓, ↓, ←, →, ←, →, B, A, B, A, Start - This will give your character a super-sweet [[tattoo|face-tattoo]]!</center> | |||
== Parodies == | == Parodies == | ||
<center> | |||
'''Michael Jackson's Punch-Out!''' | '''Michael Jackson's Punch-Out!''' | ||
<youtube>ILjJDcI2Em8</youtube><br> | <youtube>ILjJDcI2Em8</youtube><br> | ||
Line 48: | Line 61: | ||
'''Punch-Out!! Trailer - Nintendo Short Cuts''' | '''Punch-Out!! Trailer - Nintendo Short Cuts''' | ||
<youtube>SiBER4iVwCw</youtube><br> | <youtube>SiBER4iVwCw</youtube><br> | ||
</center> | |||
==See Also== | ==See Also== | ||
[[Image:Loltyson.gif|thumb|right|[[Unrealistic expectations|Use your 120lb boxer to defeat Mike Tyson in his prime.]]]] | |||
*[[Boxing]] | |||
*[[Mike Tyson]] | *[[Mike Tyson]] | ||
*[[NES]] | |||
*[[Nigga stole my bike]] | *[[Nigga stole my bike]] | ||
{{ | {{Nintendo}} | ||
{{gaming}} | {{gaming}} | ||
[[Category:Gaming]] | [[Category:Gaming]] | ||
{{stub}} |
Latest revision as of 15:54, 29 December 2016
Mike Tyson's Punch Out is the timeless tale of how a bland, emotionless white guy can brutally overcome any and all racially offensive stereotype ever concieved. Coached by Al Roker, the hero (Little Albert) uppercuts his way to become the Mismatched Weight Class Champion of the World! This is probably one of the easiest Nintendo games to beat ever released. Every day some NES fucktard fanboy remembers how sweet this game used to be and forces his little buddies to watch him play this antiquated, racist, offensive game until he gets bored and invariably moves on to reminisce about Little Nemo the Dream Master for 20 minutes. YTMND has had over 9000 stupid parodies of it. black person stole my- SHUT THE FUCK UP THE FAD DIED YEARS AGO. Mike Tyson starred in it before he raped a bunch of 16-year-old girls and Nintendo decided to replace him with a generic white guy who somehow wasn't Lowtax.
Character Roster
Name | Information |
---|---|
Glass Joe | Unseasoned boxer with a record of 1-99 (whoever lost to him deserves to be maimed, tortured, and reaped because he is terrible). His attacks consist of getting punched 10+ times and falling down. Nintendo claim he's French, but we call bullshit, since he actually stays in the ring until he's knocked out. |
Von Kaiser | The closest thing to Hitler that Nintendo would allow. He has a bad heart and his super attack is 'Final Solution'. |
Piston Honda | Gook champion of the Beginners circuit. He attacks by utilizing some possibly illegal karate-punching. |
Don Flamenco | Some faggot from Spain. He holds a rose in his mouth and attempts to molest you. |
King Hippo | A fatass everybody thought was hard until they figured out his obvious weak spot. |
Great Tiger | A Paki who spins around and attacks you with SPESHUL MAGICZZ!!! then has a seizure like a retarded monkey exposed to rapidly flashing-lights. |
Bald Bull | A secret muslim from Turkey. His 'Bull Charge' is pretty impressive but unfortunately it does not make up for his lack of personality... the drapes match the curtains. |
Vodka Drunkenski | Russian pedophile who attempts to spread the joys of communism; Nintendo actually changed his name to "Soda Popinski" as they were afraid butthurt parents might bawww otherwise. |
Mr. Sandman | A negro who wants to put Mac to sleep; attacks by being an asshole and playing the race-card. |
Super Macho Man | RELEASE THE BOGUS! |
Mr. Dream | Nintendo's Jew tactic after dumping Tyson from the game for going on a rampage so that they can re-release the same fucking game a million times and inadvertantly proving once and for all that the White-man will always be the dominant race. |
Parodies
Michael Jackson's Punch-Out!
Barack Obama Punches Out Rush Limbaugh
Punch-Out!! Trailer - Nintendo Short Cuts
See Also
Mike Tyson's Punch Out is part of a series on Visit the Gaming Portal for complete coverage. |