|
|
| (30 intermediate revisions by 17 users not shown) |
| Line 1: |
Line 1: |
| {{spoiler|Donald Trump has already won the Presidency! [https://www.sbstatesman.com/2016/02/23/political-science-professor-forecasts-trump-as-general-election-winner/]}}
| | [[File:DonaldTrump-HomeAlone2.jpg|right|thumb|251px|Picture of Donald J. Trump, who is an average human being, helping out a perfectly normal human child.]] |
|
| |
|
| {{FactAlert|President Donald Trump bought a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.}}
| | '''Donald John Trump''' is a [[You're A Fucking White Male|white American male]] and the 45th and 47th President of the [[United States]]. He was born on June 14th, 1946, and has an estimated net worth of $5.5 billion. He is married to Melania Trump, and his children include Donald Jr., Ivanka, Eric, Tiffany, and Barron. He also appeared in the movie ''Home Alone 2'' as a friendly but otherwise average human being. |
| [[File:Couldnt_Stop_Trump.jpg|center]] | |
|
| |
|
| {{quote|I would look her in that fat, ugly face of hers and say 'Rosie, you're fired!'|President Donald Trump}}
| | This is about as neutral and unbiased as we can get about him. If you want to read a completely biased and absolutely one-sided article about Trump, check out these articles: |
|
| |
|
| [[File:Trumpenis.jpg|thumb|Make America great again!]] | | * '''[[The Donald]]''' — for all the [[white nationalist]] [[Kekistan]]i [[alt-right]] [[racist]]s who voted for Trump and are therefore the reason why the US has turned into Nazi Germany 2: [[Electric Boogaloo]]. |
| | * '''[[Donald Drumpf]]''' — for all the [[white guilt]]-filled [[nu-male]] [[soyboy]]s living in [[San Francisco]] who can't understand why their screaming at the sky for hours every day didn't change anything. |
|
| |
|
| '''The Donald''', or '''President Donald Jesus Trump''' ([[Hitler did nothing wrong|Did Nothing Wrong]]), is a [[Bullshit|god amongst men]]. Never half-piss around when President Donald is around cause he'll [[rape]] you for not fully pissing around, fire you for being unproductive, sue you for [[libel]], and pillage your clan of its cattle. President Donald Trump is a fucking genius. One fact that proves just how much of a genius The Donald is, he has personally gone bankrupt '''four fucking times'''. [http://www.businessinsider.com/donald-trump-i-have-never-gone-bankrupt-2015-8 Wrong, faggot.]He's pissed away billions of dollars and yet people ''still'' get in line to give this [[asshole]] their money. In addition to the power to dupe [[Jews]] and [[You|goyim]] out of their money, President Trump also has the ability to suspend time itself. This amazing power means that even though he continues to get older, his girlfriends never age beyond 23. This power is also known as "money," and allows even an ugly, paunchy, used car salesman like President Trump to score more tail than [[you]] ever will. [[You|Fags]] at ED stand behind him every step of the way.
| | If neither of these articles suit your needs... then |
| | [[Where do you think we are?|what are you doing here]]? |
|
| |
|
| He also has his own world renowned television show, in which he makes [[niggers]] and [[women]] do his work for him. Recently President Trump is running for [[president]] and has, surprisingly, [[Lulz|been supported by many]]. On the other hand, many [[lulz]] were had at his expense. The Donald is a primordial source of [[lulz]], for example he was what caused Loki to cut off Sif's golden hair because The Donald only deserves the best in toupées.
| | ==Related Articles== |
| [[File:Trump Tweets.jpg|right|thumb|Just another day on President Trump's Twitter account.]] | | * [[Hillary Clinton]] |
| | * [[Joe Biden]] |
| | * [[Kamala Harris (prostitute)|Kamala Harris]] |
| | * [[Thedonald.win]] |
|
| |
|
| __TOC__
| | ==External Links== |
| | | * {{twitter|realDonaldTrump}} — His personal Twitter account |
| {{clear}}
| | * {{twitter|POTUS45}} — His official Presidential Twitter account |
| | | * {{facebook|DonaldTrump}} — His personal Facebook account |
| == ED Approved == | | * {{facebook|POTUS45}} — His official Facebook account |
| [[image:Trumphattomoko.png|right|230px]]
| | * {{instagram|realdonaldtrump}} — His Instagram page |
| {{approve|Rosie}} | | * {{yt|c|UCAql2DyGU2un1Ei2nMYsqOA|Donald J Trump}} — His YouTube account |
| | | |
| The Donald gets the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] seal of approval.
| | <div style="background-color:#f8f8f8; border:1px solid #dddddd; padding:.5em; margin-top:35px;" class="notice">This is a '''disambiguation''' page — <choose> |
| [[Image:Trumphair.jpg|left|thumb|Sif's hair toupée.]]
| | <option>it is the best disambiguation page ever, no other disambiguation page is better than this.</option> |
| | | <option>you're fired.</option> |
| == Life of Leisure ==
| | <option>we're building a disambiguation page, and Uncyclopedia will pay for it.</option> |
| [[Image:Trumpcream.jpg|right|thumb|President Trump during his [[OM NOM NOM|daily routine]].]]
| | <option>grab 'em by the disambiguation page!</option> |
| President Trump spends his days in his [[Manhattan]] home, eating [[Delicious Cake|delicious cake]] and playing with himself. He dreams of [[Jessi Slaughter]] and [[faps]] his 24 karat gilded five inch penis. In recent years he has begun to lure in [[Shotacon|little boys]] with wads of [[money|cash]] to have sex with him. President Trump, being the latent homosexual that is his agenda, is the sole financial source behind [[Boku no Pico]]. [[True|It is rumored that the plot is inspired by President Trump's childhood]], but given how much President Trump brags about his accomplishments, if he did have such an awesome childhood--he'd never shut the fuck up about it. It is speculated that he will pander to [[Apple|militant homosexuals]] after he [[Cocks|locks]] up the [[NAMBLA|GOP]] nomination. He also has an extensive wardrobe, which ranges from [[nigger|green business]] [[suit]]s to [[Slut|skimpy, black]] [[panties]]. It should be noted that President Trump has managed to bankrupt his entire business empire, ''twice'', the first time it was a chain of casino resorts, which even those with the most tenuous grasp on economics, will tell you is '''fucking impossible''' unless you <s>are a</s> hire complete and utter retards. Both times President Trump got back on his feet again, from a combination of giving blowjobs to his [[neo-con]] friends (including the Clintons) and begging for [[Bailout Plan|bailouts]] from the government. The joke is on you cause he has "fuck you" money many times over and [[poor|you are reading this not fully clothed]].
| | </choose></div> |
| | | |
| == The Apprentice ==
| | [[Category:Disambiguation]] |
| President Trump's [[shitty|great]] reality television show is called ''The Apprentice''. The show also has a [[retarded]] brother called "The Celebrity Apprentice." This show has been home to many stars, including [[nigger|Lil' Jon]], [[Michael Jackson|La Toya Jackson]], and that one [[Fatman27183141|fat guy]]. President Donald Trump has also been seen extorting money from other contestants including rock singer [[food|Meatloaf]]. [[Arnold Schwarzenegger]] [http://money.cnn.com/2015/09/14/media/arnold-schwarzenegger-apprentice-nbc/ will be hosting the next The Celebrity Apprentice] because even President Donald Trump's job has been stolen by an immigrant.
| | [[Category:TV and Movies]] |
| | | [[Category:America]] |
| == 2012 Presidential Election ==
| |
| {{quote|I do not know what the 13 stripes represent [on the US flag].|President Donald Trump [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/385916/may-10-2011/difference-makers---donald-trump on The Colbert Report]}} | |
| | |
| ==2016 Presidential Election==
| |
| {{Spoilers|Donnie will <s>not</s> win}} | |
| [[File:Donald_Trump_RAPE.png|right|thumb|Self Explanatory.]]
| |
| [[File:Unstumpable_Trump.jpg|left|thumb|[[Mantrain|The Trump Train]] has no brakes!]]
| |
| [[File:Huffington_Post_on_Trump.jpg|left|thumb|If only pundits were as aware as this meme regarding Trump's rise.]]
| |
| [[File:Trumpvsbernie.jpg|right|thumb|150px|This is what stormfags actually beleive.]]
| |
| {{quote|To understand today’s Republican Party, you have to understand that despite the fact that they had on the stage five governors, three senators, and a retarded neurosurgeon, first and foremost they wanted to get the opinion of President Donald Trump—a ham-colored cartoon character from I Love the ‘80s. Once you accept that, the rest of the night makes perfect sense. | |
| | |
| That’s all they have to sell: fear. Hope and change meet pee and poo. The entire slate of them up there seemed entirely unaware of the fact that women can now vote. Megyn Kelly asked President Trump right off the bat about President Trump calling women ‘fat pigs,’ ‘slobs,’ and ‘dogs.’ Trump’s answer? ‘I don’t have time for political correctness.’ He’s like one of those construction workers from the ‘70s who goes, ‘Nice tits. Oh, what? I can’t compliment a lady anymore?’ It’s crazy.”| --[http://www.salon.com/2015/08/08/bill_maher_unloads_on_nasty_boorish_sexist_ignorant_smug_donald_trump/ Bill Maher,] a typical libtard who can't be more mature than "pee and poo."}}
| |
| | |
| {{quote|Sorry, Trump! I'm not voting for you and I don't think anybody else will, either.|[[Chris-chan]] [http://sonichu.com/cwcki/$50_for_a_video_holiday_greeting! stumps the Trump]. (Now that Chris-chan's a shemale, he's a leftist.)}} | |
| | |
| More on why Trump will win ==> [https://medium.com/@DylanBleier/trump-will-win-the-2016-election-101a60edbaa6]
| |
| {{clear}} | |
| | |
| ===Trump vs Trump===
| |
| <center><youtube>WpKiP_gmDS8</youtube></center>
| |
| | |
| ===Trump 'Make America Great Again' Hat Meme===
| |
| In 2015, President Trump introduced his campaign swag bearing the slogan 'Make America Great Again'.
| |
| By the end of 2016, it is expected that everyone in America who isn't a SJW or ISIS member will be sporting the popular 'Make America Great Again' ballcap | |
| <center><youtube>Jv4Ubp0hdEU</youtube></center> | |
| | |
| === Rick Wilson === | |
| | |
| [[File:RickWilsonCuck.jpg|right|thumb|150px|Dopey cuckservative, father of aspiring piss-pimp.]]
| |
| | |
| [[File:RickWilson.jpg|left|thumb|250px|Wilson smeared Trump supporters, leading to a scathing Gawker/Buzzfeed expose of his son's racist piss erotica.]]
| |
| | |
| Within the frigid depths of January, [[2016]], Republican media consultant and adviser to multiple failed candidates Rick Wilson railed against Trump the only way he knew how. During a [[old media|television interview]], Wilson denounced Trump's younger supporters as childless men who fap to anime and will never amount to anything. Though none can deny the obvious truth of such a statement, said lack of refutation did nothing to deter something along the lines of [[CIA|blowback]].
| |
| | |
| Watchful and doubtlessly butthurt Trumpenkriegers almost immediately discovered that Wilson's son was a 19 year old layabout whose primary activity was writing and publishing [http://rachelvaltrexacote.kinja.com/when-a-gop-pundit-attacked-trolls-responded-what-they-1754204712 blatantly cringeworthy snuff and rape fapfiction]. In particular, Rick Wilson's son, Andrew Wilson, enjoys fantasizing about brutally beating and raping prostitutes and pissing down their throats. It appears as though Wilson has yet to realize the [[hypocrisy]] of the situation, as his own deviant wastrel is no better than the weeaboos he openly loathes.
| |
| | |
| == Products and companies President Trump asks you to boycott ==
| |
| * Oreo cookies
| |
| * Carrier Air Conditioners
| |
| * Pfizer Pharmaceuticals
| |
| * Starbucks
| |
| * Apple
| |
| * Mexican Drugs
| |
| * Chinese Products
| |
| | |
| ==Videos==
| |
| | |
| {{center|
| |
| {{fv|Videos|background-color:#COCOCO;text-align:center;|font-weight:bold;
| |
| |<youtube>5UO3nn7awUk</youtube>
| |
| ;The notorious suppressed 1991 documentary
| |
| |<youtube>DT55Jt4mS2g</youtube>
| |
| ;Don't go stealing Donald's Thunder
| |
| |<youtube>kvB4rBI4MtA</youtube>
| |
| ;Trump supporter telling it like it is!
| |
| |<youtube>_fAQ_j-DqXw</youtube>
| |
| ;Donald Trump is ISIS' [[fact|number one recruiter]].
| |
| |<youtube>ZC7aYLBqevc</youtube>
| |
| |<youtube>G59mNNfLZx8</youtube>}}
| |
| }}
| |
| | |
| ==The Gallery==
| |
| {{cg|President Trump Gallery|trump|center|<gallery>
| |
| Image:Plaque in Hebrew in Donald Trump's office.png|Hebrew writing plaque in Donald Trump's office - another proof that he into Jewry
| |
| Image:Donald Trump handshaking with Jared Kushner.png|Trump giving handshake to Jewred Kushner
| |
| Image:Trump_Waifu.jpeg|Avoiding answering the hard questions like any insider politician.
| |
| Image:Dtrumpmolest.jpg|Pre-gaming for the Bohemian Grove.
| |
| Image:Trump_is_Jesus.jpg|People will literally die for Trump.
| |
| Image:Dturmp.jpg|It's real like your waifu's orgasms.
| |
| Image:Shitty_antiTrump_Meme.jpg|The inability to make good memes is why the leftists will lose in 2016.
| |
| Image:Trump_and_Rand_2.jpg|Not shooped.
| |
| </gallery>|<gallery> | |
| <!>----------------NEW PICS GO BELOW THIS LINE YOU DOGFUCKING DEGENERATE!!! ----------------</!> | |
| | |
| | |
| Image:King_Trump.jpg|President Trump with his personal staff.
| |
| Image:Trump2.jpg|i think teh donald is a [[pretty cool guy]]. eh demands birth certificate and doesnt afraid of Chinese.
| |
| Image:Hail_Trump_Everyday.jpg|[[HAIL SATAN EVERYDAY|Another sort of people also support Trump.]]
| |
| Image:Dtrump1.jpg
| |
| Image:Trump3.jpg|You Mad?
| |
| Image:Trump-president-2012.gif|[[Obama|"Change Niggaz!"]]
| |
| Image:Trump1.jpg
| |
| Image:Donald-trump-fired.jpg|O rly?
| |
| Image:Trump.jpg|Pew pew pew pew
| |
| Image:Trumpsteak.jpg|Proof that you can ruin food by simply pointing at it.
| |
| Image:Trump Nazi SS.jpg|[https://archive.is/X26Ep Trump, putting the "ss" back in "business".
| |
| Image:Donald_Cat.jpg|Donald's cat.
| |
| Image:YourfiredRat.jpg|Donald's rat.
| |
| Image:Fired.jpg|Setting the standard.
| |
| Image:Trump_and_Rand.jpg
| |
| Image:Trump_hell_toupee.jpg
| |
| Image:Shitbrix_trump.png|When you see it, you'll shit brix.
| |
| Image:Trumpin.jpg|He's in your sky, ruining your views.
| |
| Image:Rosie0.jpg|Rosie O'Donnell, the Donald's only natural enemy.
| |
| <!--Missing Image:Donald-duck.gif|Not to be confused.-->
| |
| Image:Twitter_-_Trump_Gets_Pwned.png|Trump gets pwned on [[Twitter]].
| |
| Image:Rudy in drag on snl in 2000.jpg|Trump pals around with his friend [[Rudy Ghouliani]].
| |
| Image:Trump_Pepe.jpg
| |
| File:Trump-anchor.jpg
| |
| File:Donald_trump_hair_fire.gif
| |
| File:Donald_trump_monkey_pee_mouth.gif
| |
| File:Donald_trump_penis.gif
| |
| Image:Trump_On_Jon_Stewart.png|Trump's position on the Jews is mixed.
| |
| Image:Biff Tannen Donald Trump.jpg|Donald Trump back in 1985
| |
| Image:EmperorTrump.png|God Emperor Trump
| |
| </gallery>}} | |
| | |
| == See Also ==
| |
| | |
| * [[Uncle Dolan|''Dolan'' Trump]]
| |
| * [[Bernie Madoff]]
| |
| * [[Bernie Sanders]]
| |
| * [[Business]]
| |
| * [[Blaming China]]
| |
| * [[Fired]]
| |
| * [[God]]
| |
| * [[Jews]]
| |
| * [[Money]]
| |
| * [[Rosie]]
| |
| * [[The Man]]
| |
| * [[Ceiling Cat|The True God]]
| |
| | |
| == External Links ==
| |
| * [http://blog.dilbert.com/post/126589300371/clown-genius Trump the Master Persuader Wizard]
| |
| * [http://stumptrump2016.com/ Now you too can stump the trump]
| |
| * {{youtube|xGZaCnfNgLE|The Donald VS. Rosie - Trump calls Rosie a failure.}}
| |
| * [http://www.etonline.com/tv/news/38140/index.html Entertainment Tonight covers Trump/Rosie drama] - lol
| |
| * [http://trumpdonald.org/ Trump the Donald] literally.
| |
| | |
| | |
| {{jewseries}}
| |
| {{Trolls}}
| |
| {{timeline|Featured article September 16 & 17, [[2015]]|[[Shamwow]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[RationalWiki]]}}
| |
| | |
| [[Category:People|Trump, Donald]] | |
realDonaldTrump — His personal Twitter account
DonaldTrump — His personal Facebook account
realdonaldtrump — His Instagram page
Donald J Trump — His YouTube account