Satan Claus - Revision history

Paul in the Mall at 13:56, 25 December 2025

2025-12-25T13:56:42Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 13:56, 25 December 2025
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			[[Image:Santathreat.jpg\|right\|link=]]
	{{an hero}}		{{an hero}}
	{{quote\|[[Futurama\|You better watch out, you better not cry, better not pout, I'm telling you why: Satan Claus is gunning you down. He's making a list, and checking it twice; Gonna find out who's naughty and nice. Satan Claus will burn your house down.]]\|Traditional Americunt Xmas song}}		{{quote\|[[Futurama\|You better watch out, you better not cry, better not pout, I'm telling you why: Satan Claus is gunning you down. He's making a list, and checking it twice; Gonna find out who's naughty and nice. Satan Claus will burn your house down.]]\|Traditional Americunt Xmas song}}
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	{{Ibend}}		{{Ibend}}
	[[Image:Santa-pardo-delivers-heat.jpg\|thumb\|left\|Temperatures were in the 30ºs.]]		[[Image:Santa-pardo-delivers-heat.jpg\|thumb\|left\|Temperatures were in the 30ºs.]]
	~~[[Image:Santathreat.jpg\|right]]~~
	[[Image:Golden iPod satan claus.jpg\|thumb\|200px\|[[Winnar]] of the [[2008]] [[Golden iPod]]]]		[[Image:Golden iPod satan claus.jpg\|thumb\|200px\|[[Winnar]] of the [[2008]] [[Golden iPod]]]]
	[[Image:A-pardo-xmas.jpg\|thumb\|Authorities remove unopened Xmas gifts from the house.]]		[[Image:A-pardo-xmas.jpg\|thumb\|Authorities remove unopened Xmas gifts from the house.]]

Paul in the Mall at 00:48, 4 December 2024

2024-12-04T00:48:07Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 00:48, 4 December 2024
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	{{an hero}}		{{an hero}}
	{{quote\|[[Futurama\|You better watch out, you better not cry, better not pout, I'm telling you why: Satan Claus is gunning you down. He's making a list, and checking it twice; Gonna find out who's naughty and nice. Satan Claus will burn your house down.]]\|Traditional Americunt Xmas song}}		{{quote\|[[Futurama\|You better watch out, you better not cry, better not pout, I'm telling you why: Satan Claus is gunning you down. He's making a list, and checking it twice; Gonna find out who's naughty and nice. Satan Claus will burn your house down.]]\|Traditional Americunt Xmas song}}
			{{ib\|[[File:BruceJeffreyPardo.jpg\|200px]]}}
			{{Ibhead\|<big>'''Bruce Jeffrey Pardo'''</big>}}
			{{Ibrow\|'''Born'''\|March 23, 1963}}
			{{Ibrow\|'''Died'''\|December 24, 2008 (aged 45)}}
			{{Ibrow\|'''Nationality:'''\|[[Americunt]]  [[File:MiniflagUSA.png]]}}
			{{Ibrow\|'''[[high score\|Highscore]]'''\|Killed 9, injured 3 (2 by gunfire)}}
			{{Ibrow\|'''Top 50?'''\|No}}
			{{Ibrow\|'''Style'''\|FPS, Single player}}
			{{Ibrow\|'''[[An Hero]]?'''\|Yes}}
			{{Ibend}}
	[[Image:Santa-pardo-delivers-heat.jpg\|thumb\|left\|Temperatures were in the 30ºs.]]		[[Image:Santa-pardo-delivers-heat.jpg\|thumb\|left\|Temperatures were in the 30ºs.]]
	[[Image:Santathreat.jpg\|right]]		[[Image:Santathreat.jpg\|right]]

imported>Paul in the Mall at 20:07, 29 March 2024

2024-03-29T20:07:20Z

← Older revision	Revision as of 20:07, 29 March 2024
(No difference)

imported>Paul in the Mall at 20:07, 29 March 2024

2024-03-29T20:07:20Z

@@ Line 57: / Line 57: @@
 ==The incident as told by [[Weird Al]]==
 {|style="margin: auto;"
-|<youtube>Tb-Mce9VpmY</youtube>
+|<youtube>HTGlUMvbhSw</youtube>
 |}
@@ Line 77: / Line 77: @@
 == Graded Score ==
-<center>'''Lulziest Christmas Party Ever'''</center>
+{{GradedScore|9| |18|Only 2 injured from gunfire|20|Christmas Eve Massacre!|10|Sadly isn't a well known shooting, only talked about mostly in [[California]]|20|Bonus for dressing up as Santa, and using A FUCKING FLAMETHROWER!|[[77]]|C+|Lulziest Christmas Party Ever}}
-<center>
+{{Wanted|3}}
 ==See Also==

imported>Crossbow at 17:46, 23 March 2024

2024-03-23T17:46:43Z

← Older revision	Revision as of 17:46, 23 March 2024
(No difference)

imported>Crossbow at 17:46, 23 March 2024

2024-03-23T17:46:43Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 17:46, 23 March 2024
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	[[Category:People\|Claus, Satan]]		[[Category:People\|Claus, Satan]]
			[[Category:An Heroes]]
	[[category:Events]]		[[category:Events]]
	[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]]		[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]]
	[[Category:2008]]		[[Category:2008]]

imported>Glitchedblood at 18:20, 18 September 2021

2021-09-18T18:20:24Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 18:20, 18 September 2021
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			{{an hero}}
	{{quote\|[[Futurama\|You better watch out, you better not cry, better not pout, I'm telling you why: Satan Claus is gunning you down. He's making a list, and checking it twice; Gonna find out who's naughty and nice. Satan Claus will burn your house down.]]\|Traditional Americunt Xmas song}}		{{quote\|[[Futurama\|You better watch out, you better not cry, better not pout, I'm telling you why: Satan Claus is gunning you down. He's making a list, and checking it twice; Gonna find out who's naughty and nice. Satan Claus will burn your house down.]]\|Traditional Americunt Xmas song}}

imported>Neo2001: /* Graded Score */

2018-09-19T20:27:10Z

Graded Score

← Older revision		Revision as of 20:27, 19 September 2018
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	[[Image:Santa-pardo-delivers-heat.jpg\|thumb\|left\|Temperatures were in the 30ºs.]]		[[Image:Santa-pardo-delivers-heat.jpg\|thumb\|left\|Temperatures were in the 30ºs.]]
	[[Image:Santathreat.jpg\|~~thumb\|200px~~]]		[[Image:Santathreat.jpg\|right]]
	[[Image:Golden iPod satan claus.jpg\|thumb\|200px\|[[Winnar]] of the [[2008]] [[Golden iPod]]]]		[[Image:Golden iPod satan claus.jpg\|thumb\|200px\|[[Winnar]] of the [[2008]] [[Golden iPod]]]]
	[[Image:A-pardo-xmas.jpg\|thumb\|Authorities remove unopened Xmas gifts from the house.]]		[[Image:A-pardo-xmas.jpg\|thumb\|Authorities remove unopened Xmas gifts from the house.]]
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	==Naughty or Nice?==		==Naughty or Nice?==
	{{quote\|[[lies\|It's just not something we see here at any time of the year]] -- especially during Christmas.\|Covina police Lieutenant Pat Buchanan}}		{{quote\|[[lies\|It's just not something we see here at any time of the year]] -- especially during Christmas.\|Covina police Lieutenant Pat Buchanan}}


	Santa ('''sɑːt ʊˈn''') opened fire as he entered the house, first shooting an [[loli\|8-year-old girl]] who answered the door '''[[Headshot\|in the face]]''' with one of his five semi-automatic pistols. He then managed to [[pwn]] nine people and wound several more, including his [[16-year-old]] fat and sassy stepdaughter (who he shot in the back), his in-laws and most of their family before burning the house down with Napalm on a chilly Christmas Eve in Southern California.		Santa ('''sɑːt ʊˈn''') opened fire as he entered the house, first shooting an [[loli\|8-year-old girl]] who answered the door '''[[Headshot\|in the face]]''' with one of his five semi-automatic pistols. He then managed to [[pwn]] nine people and wound several more, including his [[16-year-old]] fat and sassy stepdaughter (who he shot in the back), his in-laws and most of their family before burning the house down with Napalm on a chilly Christmas Eve in Southern California.
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	[[Last Thursday]], a rented car parked outside the property was discovered to be loaded with 300 rounds of ammunition and a [[ATHF\|pipe bomb]] that had been [[Sup Dawg\|nigrigged]] to take out first responders. The [[Exploding Van\|car was blown to hell]] after bomb disposal experts moved in and discovered the trip-wires.		[[Last Thursday]], a rented car parked outside the property was discovered to be loaded with 300 rounds of ammunition and a [[ATHF\|pipe bomb]] that had been [[Sup Dawg\|nigrigged]] to take out first responders. The [[Exploding Van\|car was blown to hell]] after bomb disposal experts moved in and discovered the trip-wires.

	{{quote\|I heard he had two guns. We need the stats on the guns, ammo and kill ratio to consider Santa Pardo for legendary pwnage status.\|/[[b]]/}}		{{quote\|I heard he had two guns. We need the stats on the guns, ammo and kill ratio to consider Santa Pardo for legendary pwnage status.\|[[b/\|/b/]]}}

	But ol' Satan Nick's story reached beyond just the internets. The Jews running Hollywood were apparently so moved by this tragedy, that they dedicated several films to the memory of Mr. Pardo.		But ol' Satan Nick's story reached beyond just the internets. The Jews running Hollywood were apparently so moved by this tragedy, that they dedicated several films to the memory of Mr. Pardo.

	~~<center>~~		{\|style="margin: auto;"
	{{fv\|creepy\|background-color: white;\|font-weight: bold; \|<youtube>FKrsAFWPnl4</youtube>\|<youtube>~~DUdozUqZXxc~~</youtube>}}		\|{{fv\|creepy\|background-color: white;\|font-weight: bold; \|<youtube>FKrsAFWPnl4</youtube>\|<youtube>xUruOrh_b6Y</youtube>}}
	~~</center>~~		\|}

	==The incident as told by [[Weird Al]]==		==The incident as told by [[Weird Al]]==
	~~<center>~~<youtube>Tb-Mce9VpmY</youtube>~~</center>~~		{\|style="margin: auto;"
			\|<youtube>Tb-Mce9VpmY</youtube>
			\|}

	==Gallery==		==Gallery==

	<center><gallery>		{{center\|
			<gallery>
	Image:Psycho santa 01.png\|Amiga already predicted this in the early 90s		Image:Psycho santa 01.png\|Amiga already predicted this in the early 90s
	Image:Crazysanta.jpg\|HO HO HO, You're coming with me.		Image:Crazysanta.jpg\|HO HO HO, You're coming with me.
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	Image:Santa_study.jpg\|Santa's [[Bible\|bible]].		Image:Santa_study.jpg\|Santa's [[Bible\|bible]].
	Image:Flamethrower used by satan claus.jpg\|The flamethrower used by Satan Claus [http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28385277/page/2/ DELICIOUS SAUCE]		Image:Flamethrower used by satan claus.jpg\|The flamethrower used by Satan Claus [http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28385277/page/2/ DELICIOUS SAUCE]
	~~Image~~:~~SatanClaus_shooterGame~~.png\|~~Christmas through the eyes of Satan Claus~~		</gallery>
	</~~gallery~~></center>		}}

			== Graded Score ==
			{\| style="{{roundy\|18px}}{{gradlinear\|red\|orange}}box-shadow:0 3px 6px gray;padding:1em;margin:0 auto 1em auto;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="2" border="0"
			\|-
			! colspan="2" style="{{roundy\|9px}}background-color:red;box-shadow:0 3px 6px orange;" \| <big>Graded score</big>
			\|-
			\| colspan="2" style="height:9px;overflow:hidden;" \|
			\|-
			! style="text-align:right;" \| Kill count:
			\|9/20
			\|-
			! style="text-align:right;vertical-align:top;" \| Accuracy:
			\|18/20 ''Only 2 injured from gunfire''
			\|-
			! style="text-align:right;" \| Style:
			\|20/20 ''Christmas Eve Massacre!''
			\|-
			! style="text-align:right;" \| Butthurt:
			\|10/20 ''Sadly isn't a well known shooting, only talked about mostly in [[California\|California]]''
			\|-
			! style="text-align:right;vertical-align:top;" \| Bonus:
			\|20/20 ''Bonus for dressing up as Santa, and using A FUCKING FLAMETHROWER!''
			\|-
			! colspan="2" style="{{roundy\|9px}}background-color:orange;box-shadow:0 3px 6px yellow;" \| <big>Total score: [[Anders Behring Breivik\|77]]/100 ('''C+''')</big>
			\|}

			<center>'''Lulziest Christmas Party Ever'''</center>
			<center>'''[[High Score\| See full ranking]]'''</center>

			<center>
			<div style="{{roundy\|10px}}border:2px solid #000;width:30%;background:linear-gradient(#e18f80, #666c05);background:-moz-linear-gradient(#002db3, #4da6ff);background:-webkit-linear-gradient(#002db3, #4da6ff);background:-o-linear-gradient(#e18f80, #666c05);padding:10px;font-weight:bold;font-size:larger">
			<span style="font-size:16pt;">'''Wanted Level:'''</span>
			<br>
			<span> ___________________ </span>
			{\|align="center"
			\|[[File:Wantedstar.png\|40px]]
			\|[[File:Wantedstar.png\|40px]]
			\|[[File:Wantedstar.png\|40px]]
			\|}
			<span> ___________________ </span>
			<br>
			{\|align="center"
			\|[[File:Wanted4swat.png\|128px]]
			\|}
			<br>
			<span style="font-size:12pt;">'''Vice Squad'''</span>
			</div><br>
			</center>

	==See Also==		==See Also==
			*[[Adam Lanza]] - The ultimate Christmas Grinch
	*[[Santa Claus]]		*[[Santa Claus]]
	*[[Christmas]]		*[[Christmas]]
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	*[[Cho Seung-Hui\|The Chominator]]		*[[Cho Seung-Hui\|The Chominator]]
	*[[KILL IT WITH FIRE]]		*[[KILL IT WITH FIRE]]
			*[[Krampus]]

	==External Links==		==External Links==
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	*[http://www.newsweek.com/id/185440 He was a "family annihilator"]		*[http://www.newsweek.com/id/185440 He was a "family annihilator"]
	{{clear}}		{{clear}}


	{{anheroes}}		{{anheroes}}
	{{religion}}		{{religion}}
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	{{Timeline\|Featured article December 25, [[2010]]\|[[Clayranger89]]\|{{PAGENAME}}\|[[Online Roleplaying]]}}		{{Timeline\|Featured article December 25, [[2010]]\|[[Clayranger89]]\|{{PAGENAME}}\|[[Online Roleplaying]]}}
	{{Timeline\|Featured article December 24 & December 25, [[2011]]\|[[Jesus]]\|{{PAGENAME}}\|[[The Dan Lirette Story]]}}		{{Timeline\|Featured article December 24 & December 25, [[2011]]\|[[Jesus]]\|{{PAGENAME}}\|[[The Dan Lirette Story]]}}
	[[Category: People\|Claus, Satan]]
			[[Category:People\|Claus, Satan]]
	[[category:Events]]		[[category:Events]]


	[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]]		[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]]
	[[Category:2008]]		[[Category:2008]]

imported>Oddguy: /* External Links */

2015-05-26T13:49:03Z

External Links

← Older revision	Revision as of 13:49, 26 May 2015
(No difference)

imported>Oddguy: /* External Links */

2015-05-26T13:49:03Z

External Links

← Older revision		Revision as of 13:49, 26 May 2015
(No difference)

← Older revision		Revision as of 00:48, 4 December 2024
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	{{an hero}}		{{an hero}}
	{{quote\|[[Futurama\|You better watch out, you better not cry, better not pout, I'm telling you why: Satan Claus is gunning you down. He's making a list, and checking it twice; Gonna find out who's naughty and nice. Satan Claus will burn your house down.]]\|Traditional Americunt Xmas song}}		{{quote\|[[Futurama\|You better watch out, you better not cry, better not pout, I'm telling you why: Satan Claus is gunning you down. He's making a list, and checking it twice; Gonna find out who's naughty and nice. Satan Claus will burn your house down.]]\|Traditional Americunt Xmas song}}
			{{ib\|[[File:BruceJeffreyPardo.jpg\|200px]]}}
			{{Ibhead\|<big>'''Bruce Jeffrey Pardo'''</big>}}
			{{Ibrow\|'''Born'''\|March 23, 1963}}
			{{Ibrow\|'''Died'''\|December 24, 2008 (aged 45)}}
			{{Ibrow\|'''Nationality:'''\|[[Americunt]]  [[File:MiniflagUSA.png]]}}
			{{Ibrow\|'''[[high score\|Highscore]]'''\|Killed 9, injured 3 (2 by gunfire)}}
			{{Ibrow\|'''Top 50?'''\|No}}
			{{Ibrow\|'''Style'''\|FPS, Single player}}
			{{Ibrow\|'''[[An Hero]]?'''\|Yes}}
			{{Ibend}}
	[[Image:Santa-pardo-delivers-heat.jpg\|thumb\|left\|Temperatures were in the 30ºs.]]		[[Image:Santa-pardo-delivers-heat.jpg\|thumb\|left\|Temperatures were in the 30ºs.]]
	[[Image:Santathreat.jpg\|right]]		[[Image:Santathreat.jpg\|right]]