HellenicTrapstar: /* Uses For Rats */ Target pratice

2024-08-15T15:50:48Z

Uses For Rats: Target pratice

← Older revision		Revision as of 15:50, 15 August 2024
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	{{fv\|Ratsvids\|background-color: white; margin: auto;\|font-weight: bold;\|<center><youtube>RTJS92IDEKA</youtube> <br> Arabic Space Program</center>\|<center><youtube>csCqPYea-aI</youtube> <br> Wait for it...</center>\|<center><youtube>726VO_ZPHwA</youtube></center> <br> Read the comment section kek\|<center><youtube>A-9BpqaQwQE</youtube> <br> Snake drowns and eats a rat while clueless retard narrates</center>\|<center><youtube>965vYG-4Cws</youtube> <br> Decapitation!</center>\|<center><youtube>YTKNahASSDI</youtube> <br> A ratfag's love song.</center>\|<center><youtube>Vw0HJlBbkpw</youtube> <br> A true story about rats. </center>\|<center><youtube>_tBO5JikbAs</youtube> <br> Rats being boiled alive in oil. </center>}}		{{fv\|Ratsvids\|background-color: white; margin: auto;\|font-weight: bold;\|<center><youtube>RTJS92IDEKA</youtube> <br> Arabic Space Program</center>\|<center><youtube>csCqPYea-aI</youtube> <br> Wait for it...</center>\|<center><youtube>726VO_ZPHwA</youtube></center> <br> Read the comment section kek\|<center><youtube>A-9BpqaQwQE</youtube> <br> Snake drowns and eats a rat while clueless retard narrates</center>\|<center><youtube>965vYG-4Cws</youtube> <br> Decapitation!</center>\|<center><youtube>YTKNahASSDI</youtube> <br> A ratfag's love song.</center>\|<center><youtube>Vw0HJlBbkpw</youtube> <br> A true story about rats. </center>\|<center><youtube>_tBO5JikbAs</youtube> <br> Rats being boiled alive in oil. </center>}}

	* Target practice. We suggest .22lr ratshot.		* Target practice. We suggest .22lr ratshot or .177 airguns.
	* [[Science\|Subjects for medical experients]] - ideally [[lulzy\|cruel]] ones.		* [[Science\|Subjects for medical experients]] - ideally [[lulzy\|cruel]] ones.
	* Food for a proper pet, such as a cat, [[Happy Snake\|snake]], bird of prey, or some kind of [[Battletoads\|large, carnivorous toad]].		* Food for a proper pet, such as a cat, [[Happy Snake\|snake]], bird of prey, or some kind of [[Battletoads\|large, carnivorous toad]].

HellenicTrapstar: /* Gallery */

2024-08-15T15:50:12Z

Gallery

← Older revision		Revision as of 15:50, 15 August 2024
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	File:Baby rats.jpg		File:Baby rats.jpg
	File:Dirtyassmouse.jpg\|The other kind of mouse		File:Dirtyassmouse.jpg\|The other kind of mouse
			File:RatTrap.jpeg
	File:Excuse me how much for that rat.jpg\|Excuse me how much for that rat?		File:Excuse me how much for that rat.jpg\|Excuse me how much for that rat?
	</gallery>\|}}		</gallery>\|}}

HellenicTrapstar: /* Gallery */

2024-08-15T15:47:04Z

Gallery

← Older revision		Revision as of 15:47, 15 August 2024
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	File:Mouse Crucifixion.jpg		File:Mouse Crucifixion.jpg
	File:Rat Standing.jpg		File:Rat Standing.jpg
	~~File:Haha rat look like penis.png~~
	File:Ratkilled.gif		File:Ratkilled.gif
	File:Ratfug.png		File:Ratfug.png
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	File:Rat Attack.jpg\|A typical rat attack.		File:Rat Attack.jpg\|A typical rat attack.
	File:Hamster.gif\|Hamsters are better anyway		File:Hamster.gif\|Hamsters are better anyway
	~~File:Haha rat looks like penis.jpg~~
	File:Hamster 2.gif		File:Hamster 2.gif
	File:Hamster 3.gif		File:Hamster 3.gif

imported>AlGore: /* Gallery */

2017-08-26T15:14:02Z

Gallery

Show changes

imported>Vermin: we got a page for dat

2015-02-23T22:19:57Z

we got a page for dat

← Older revision	Revision as of 22:19, 23 February 2015
(No difference)

imported>Vermin: we got a page for dat

2015-02-23T22:19:57Z

we got a page for dat

← Older revision		Revision as of 22:19, 23 February 2015
(No difference)

imported>Vermin: we got a page for dat

2015-02-23T22:19:57Z

we got a page for dat

← Older revision		Revision as of 22:19, 23 February 2015
(No difference)

imported>Vermin: we got a page for dat

2015-02-23T22:19:57Z

we got a page for dat

New page

[[File:PwnedRat.jpg|thumb|right|A rat that has been [[pwned]].]]
[[File:Giant rat.jpg|thumb|right|Lord Almighty, look at the size of that big bastard!]]
The '''rat''', or [[Jew|Jew-mouse]], is a filthy, plague-carrying creature that [[lurker|lives amongst, but generally out of the sight of]] humans.

On average, rats measure about [[Six Inch Foxdick|six inches]] long from the end of their snouts to the tips of their disgusting, twitching, scaly and hairless [[cocks|tails]], although there are cases of them growing much, much larger, with some reaching the size of a small [[dog]]. Unlike [[you]], rats have a lot of [[sex]] and so breed prolifically, eventually resulting in [[newfags|infestation]]. Rats are also extremely adaptable, hardy creatures, able to scratch a living just about anywhere, so long as there's a reliable food source nearby (which isn't hard, as rats eat fucking anything, [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=idG1Z1nM_x0 including themselves]). Because of this, no matter where you are on the planet Earth, you are never more than six feet away from a rat.

If you have rats in your house, it is generally a good sign that you are a fucking slob who should clean moar. Rats spend their days eating and/or shitting in your food, gnawing through wiring in your walls and [[watersports|pissing all over everything]] as a way of leaving [[social networking|messages]] for other rats that might be in the vicinity (And believe me, there ''will'' be other rats in the vicinity).

Thankfully, [[God]] created the rat's archnemesis that preys on it: the [[cat]].

==Rats As Pets==
[[File:Crispin Glover as Willard Stiles.jpg|thumb|right|A typical rat owner.]]
{{quote|[[Dogs]] may be [[bff|man's best friend]], but rats are his [[stalker|constant companion]].}}

Bizarrely, [[sick fucks|some people]] actually choose to live with rats voluntarily, keeping the dirty vermin as pets. These individuals, hereafter referred to as 'ratfags', are universally disturbed in some way and should be treated with suspicion, if not outright hostility, because they are doubtless [[serial killer|up to something nefarious]]. <s>Nutcases like these often tend to be inferior to those who reside with ferrets</s> Disregard that, [[ferret]]s are just as bad - stinking weaselly little bastards that they are.

Notable ratfags include:

* [[Emilie Autumn]]
* [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Copeland David Copeland]
* [[Paris Hilton]]
* [[Michael Jackson]]
* [[Emo Cutter Girl]]
* [[Angelina Jolie]]
* [[Unabomber|Theodore Kaczynski]]
* [[Metal|Marilyn Manson]]
* [[FanFic Critic|Megan Wessels]]
* [[steampunk|Queen Victoria]]
* [[Lexi Bee]]
* [[Harry Potter|Ron Weasley]]
* [[Russia|Grigori Rasputin]]
* Willard Stiles

Ratfags will invariably [[lie]] about their disgusting pets, claiming them to be very clean and affectionate animals, however, we at [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] know better. [[Some argue|Some theorize]] that perhaps there is some kind of psychoactive chemical in rat shit and that, by [[Eat Da Poo Poo|eating food contaminated with their droppings]], ratfags actually have their minds altered by their revolting pets and so see them as [[Lies|cute, playful and hygienic little critters]], rather than the [[truth|disgusting, ugly, soulless pests that they actually are]].

==Disease==
[[File:Mummified rat.jpg|thumb|right|Ewww, gross.]]
[[File:Dead rat skeleton in computer pc.jpg|thumb|left|Oh, so ''that'''s what that stench was...]]

Rats carry a number of dangerous diseases that frequently result in [[death]], including Weil's disease, [http://www.adelaidenow.com.au/news/south-australia/alert-on-pet-rats-kiss-of-death/story-e6frea83-1226275197440 rat bite fever], [[yellow fever]], cryptosporidiosis, [[GOTIS]], [[Creepypasta/Retarded Creepypasta#Day Of All The Bloods|viral hemorrhagic fever]], Q fever, [[bug chasers|AIDS]], hantavirus pulmonary syndrome, toxoplasmosis, trichinosis and the [[Resident Evil|T-Virus]].

[[At least 100|At least one hundred years ago]], The Black Death, one of the most deadly pandemics in human history was caused by rats. Ratfags like to get pedantic about this and point out that, [[shit nobody cares about|actually it was the fleas that travelled on the backs of the rats, not the rats themselves]], but what they fail to realize is that even if that was the case, the plague wouldn't have fucking happened if the rats hadn't have been there in the first place.

[[TL;DR]]: Rats will kill you fucking dead and then laugh about it with their friends as they're gnawing on your cold, decaying flesh.

==Uses For Rats==
[[File:Labrat.jpg|thumb|right|Go get 'em, science!]]
[[File:Dead-rat-slippers.jpg|thumb|right|Some enterprising individual has turned these rats into some very fetching footwear.]]
[[File:The Rats by James Herbert.jpg|thumb|right|A factual account of a rat infestation in [[Londonistan|London]].]]

{{fv|Ratsvids|background-color: white; margin: auto;|font-weight: bold;|<center><youtube>csCqPYea-aI</youtube> Wait for it...</center>|<center><youtube>_Mh0gYQVacI</youtube></center> Mexican kids drown a rat, hopefully next they'll drown each other|<center><youtube>A-9BpqaQwQE</youtube> Snake drowns and eats a rat while clueless retard narrates</center>|<center><youtube>965vYG-4Cws</youtube> Decapitation!</center>|<center><youtube>YTKNahASSDI</youtube> A ratfag's love song.</center>|<center><youtube>Vw0HJlBbkpw</youtube> A true story about rats. </center>|<center><youtube>_tBO5JikbAs</youtube> Rats being boiled alive in oil. </center>|<center><youtube>MD-YgAGSojc</youtube> Huge, squealing rat gets beaten to death. </center>|<center><youtube>PglqYSoPP3M</youtube> Moar slow and painful drowning. </center>}}

* Target practice.
* [[Science|Subjects for medical experients]] - ideally [[lulzy|cruel]] ones.
* Food for a proper pet, such as a cat, [[Happy Snake|snake]], bird of prey, or some kind of [[Battletoads|large, carnivorous toad]].
* Starving them, before using them to [[Torture|torture people]].
* [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rat-baiting Rat-baiting]
* Launching into [[space]].
* [[American Psycho|Shoving into the cunt of a prostitute after you've nailed her to the floor.]]
* [[Dungeons & Dragons|Something for 1st level adventurers to kill]].
* Feeding to celebrities on reality TV shows.
* [[Pirates|People]] used to use dried rat intestines to make fuses for gunpowder, back in [[1990s|the old days]].
* Greasing up and inserting into your anus, if you are a [[homosexual]].

==Rat Facts==
[[File:Scat Rat.jpg|thumb|right|[[Pedopals|Scat Rat is one of Pedobear's best pals.]]]]
* An adult rat can squeeze into your home through a hole as small as the size of a quarter.
* Rats are not kosher, as [[Jews]] find the idea of [[cannibalism]] repugnant.
* Rats [[scat|eat shit]]. In fact, some rats love the taste of feces so much that they've been known to crawl up sewage pipes and into toilets in their search for more of the stuff.
* Rats multiply so quickly that in eighteen months, two rats could, literally, have [[over 9,000]] descendents. We are [[fucked|outnumbered]].
* Like the [[rednecks]] from ''The Texas Chainsaw Massacre'' or [[Fritzl|a certain Australian national treasure]], rats are [[incest|incestuous]] and eagerly breed with their own families.
* Some rats have wings and can fly. These are called 'pigeons'.
* Some rats are large and [[ginger]] and are fapped over by furries. These are called '[[Fox|foxes]]'.
* Some rats have been specially bred by enterprising [[Mexicans]] who have sold them to [[Paris Hilton|skanks]] as expensive fashion accessories. These are called '[[Chihuahuas]]'.
* [[India|Indian people]], who are known for their [[HA HA HA, OH WOW|meticulous hygiene]], consider rats to be sacred, as one of their silly animal-headed gods rides on a giant rat. As a result, it is considered a terrible sin to kill a rat and the little furry bastards can frequently be seen in that shit-smelling country, crawling and shitting all over everything and stealing food off people's plates without fear of reprisal.
* Rats smell fucking awful.
* A rat's strong teeth enable them to chew through glass, cinderblock, wire, aluminum and lead.
* Mice are scared of rats, likely for similar reasons that [[white people]] are wary of [[Jews did WTC|Jews]].
* Like [[Americans]] and [[niggers]], rats are at their most dangerous when they are hungry.
* Rats do not have thumbs and so are unable to operate firearms. For now.
* Rats can [[Jesus|walk on water]].
* Rats are fucking crazy fighters, able to take on creatures up to three times their size and possibly larger, if working together.
* Rats eat one fifth of the world's food supply each year, making them responsible for the deaths of millions in famines.
* On the [[Great Britain|Isle of Man]], the word 'rat' is considered terribly offensive and, as such, the creatures are called '[[lolwut|long-tails]]'. Anybody who calls a rat a rat will be punished, via a [[banhammer]].
* If a rat ever got the chance, he'd kill you and everyone you care about.

==Gallery==
{{cg||Gallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Rat bath.gif|No matter how much you scrub, you'll never be clean.
File:Mouse fight.gif
File:Skateboard Mouse.gif
File:Rat Enjoying A Meal.jpg
File:Mouse and Snake.gif
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Mouse food.jpg
File:Typical Rat Fan.gif|Typical ratfag.
File:Rat Attack.jpg|A typical rat attack.
File:Hamster.gif|Hamsters are better anyway
File:Hamster 2.gif
File:Hamster 3.gif
File:Hamster 4.gif
File:Hamster 5.gif
File:Rice Hamster.gif
File:Omnomnom.gif
File:Play dead Hamster.gif
File:I'm coming hamster.gif
File:No stopping.gif
File:Baby rats.jpg
File:Dirtyassmouse.jpg|The other kind of mouse
File:Excuse me how much for that rat.jpg|Excuse me how much for that rat?
</gallery>}}

==External Links==
*[http://www.orlandorats.com/howtokillrats.htm How to kill rats.]
*[http://voices.yahoo.com/rat-island-alaska-like-scene-horror-flick-610890.html Rats can fuck up the environment just as badly as humans can, as the people of Rat Island will tell you.]
*[http://news.sky.com/home/strange-news/article/16213384 Some old coot in England kills a giant rat]
*[http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2589961/Monster-15-inch-rat-terrorises-Swedish-family-chewing-CONCRETE-wall-make-home-kitchen.html In Sweden, they have enormous great fucking rats called 'Viking rats'. This is because they raid monasteries, rape and pillage.]
*[http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2964210/March-cat-sized-RATS-Homeowner-s-horror-finding-giant-rodent-upmarket-London-home-pest-controllers-reveal-shocking-epidemic-mutants-UK.html Mutant rats the size of cats infesting Londanistan.]
*[http://ratfanclub.org/news.html The Web 1.0-tastic website of The Rat Fan Club.]

==See Also==
* [[Rat chan]] - The hero we deserve.
* [[Jews]]
* [[Chavs]]
* [[Wolfaboo|Wolves]] - Another horrible, destructive pest with a retarded fanbase of human sympathizers.
* [[Stinkrat|Ferrets]]
* [[Chihuahuas]]
* [[Fox|Foxes]]
* [[Furries]]
* [[Emilie Autumn#Fans|Plague Rats]]
* [[Warhammer|Skaven]] - Ask /[[tg/]] about these fuckers and they'll be sure to educate you.
* [[Bidoof]]
* [[Ray Jones]] - This man likes to fuck rats.
* [[Rangerphile]]
* [[Redwall]]

{{animals}}
[[Category:Animals]][[Category:Jews]]

Rat - Revision history

HellenicTrapstar: /* Uses For Rats */ Target pratice

HellenicTrapstar: /* Gallery */

HellenicTrapstar: /* Gallery */

imported>AlGore: /* Gallery */

imported>Vermin: we got a page for dat

imported>Vermin: we got a page for dat

imported>Vermin: we got a page for dat

imported>Vermin: we got a page for dat