imported>LIOD at 11:47, 29 December 2016

2016-12-29T11:47:03Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 11:47, 29 December 2016
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	*Jerry Seinfeld		*Jerry Seinfeld
	*White Australians playing the didgeridoo and trying to convince [[Redundant\|fat Americans]] that it's somehow [[Bullshit\|cool]].		*White Australians playing the didgeridoo and trying to convince [[Redundant\|fat Americans]] that it's somehow [[Bullshit\|cool]].
			*Entering a secured [[scam\|MotoGP]] rider's room to deliver [[child abuse\|Ebola]] forgetting that [[Anons]] bugged your phone. Followed by acting like [[you]] don't care to [[illusion\|remain winning]].

imported>Mr Jonzz: {{life}}

2013-09-08T21:58:43Z

← Older revision	Revision as of 21:58, 8 September 2013
(No difference)

imported>Mr Jonzz: {{life}}

2013-09-08T21:58:43Z

← Older revision	Revision as of 21:58, 8 September 2013
(No difference)

imported>Mr Jonzz: {{life}}

2013-09-08T21:58:43Z

← Older revision	Revision as of 21:58, 8 September 2013
(No difference)

imported>Mr Jonzz: {{life}}

2013-09-08T21:58:43Z

New page

What happens when your local [[hippies|hippie]] coffee bar (would you give a liquor license to a stoner?) installs a PA. Only [[anti-lulz|fail]] occurs. Like the internet, Open Mic night is [[Srs bsns]]. No matter how hard the amateur comedians try to be like their heroes, they will ultimately only produce unfunny shit, only stoned frat boys will find funny. Comedy clubs are the greatest producers of the fail, since the comedians there have a sense of [[unwarranted self-importance]].
[[Image:Sheep.jpg|thumb| Hippie [[Fursona]]]]

Many horrible things can happen. Here's a short list:

*Poetry reading
*Shitty indie bands playing
*Unfunny faggots with names like "Howard" making jokes about "frozen lavatory waste"
*Bongo playing
*Jerry Seinfeld
*White Australians playing the didgeridoo and trying to convince [[Redundant|fat Americans]] that it's somehow [[Bullshit|cool]].

When a comedian comes on stage to do "[[shit|comedy]]", the microphone/speakers/phonograph will NEVER, EVER, work. Resulting in tons of screechy feedback sounds that are unavoidable and can be heard within a 5-mile radius. Sometimes, it will result in the speakers simply not producing any form of sound, ending in the allegedly "renowned" performer into screaming at the mic for [[moar]] sound. This, in turn, will have lulzy results.

When 1 out of the 30 acoustic guitar hipsters comes on to play, he'll usually take 30 minutes trying to set up because his "guitar doesn't seem to work with the sound system". He'll [[Bawwwww]] about how much his voice went out from the [[lie|previous gig that he had before this one]], because his voice sounds like a whispering vagina. He'll sing some dumb song about how the government is out to get his money, his children, and his shitty guitar. Followed by shitty guitar covers of even shittier pop songs.

While you ask for the sweet release of death to take you away as you suffer through another acoustic guitar players bawfest, it finally ends. But what follows is much, much worse. Not only do you have to maneuver through smelly drunks, and some [[16-year-old girl|dumb hot chick]] who refuses to leave without meeting that one cute guy who made that joke, you then have to go through the very people who you had to [[Hell|suffer]] through. They get uncomfortably close and try to sell you their cheaply burned CD's, ironed on T-shirts, and crappy bumper stickers that you will never put anywhere but to wipe your dog's ass with.

{{life}}
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[[Category: Communicae]]
{{DISPLAYTITLE:Open Mic}}

Open mic - Revision history

imported>LIOD at 11:47, 29 December 2016

imported>Mr Jonzz: {{life}}

imported>Mr Jonzz: {{life}}

imported>Mr Jonzz: {{life}}

imported>Mr Jonzz: {{life}}