Internet killers - Revision history

Psychotic Dictatorship at 14:08, 17 September 2025

2025-09-17T14:08:30Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 14:08, 17 September 2025
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	Despite the confusing title, no one has yet managed to kill someone ''via'' the internet. Fortunately, with the aid of the [[Internet Hate Machine]] channeled through the fourth dimensional warp-fields made possible by quantum computing, this is becoming a more likely scenario in the coming decades. And it's about fucking time.		Despite the confusing title, no one has yet managed to kill someone ''via'' the internet. Fortunately, with the aid of the [[Internet Hate Machine]] channeled through the fourth dimensional warp-fields made possible by quantum computing, this is becoming a more likely scenario in the coming decades. And it's about fucking time.

			== See Also ==
			* [[Kill count by website]]
			* [[Craigslist Killer]]
			* [[LJ killers]]

	[[Category:Internet Killers\| ]]		[[Category:Internet Killers\| ]]
	[[Category:People]]		[[Category:People]]

imported>Carpice at 17:37, 16 July 2022

2022-07-16T17:37:59Z

imported>Lolyunohavgudsoftware at 23:40, 23 October 2015

2015-10-23T23:40:05Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:40, 23 October 2015
Line 1:		Line 1:
	{{Killers}}		{{Killers}}
			{{TOCright}}

	'''Internet killers''' are a group of l33t h4x0rz intent on causing [[IRL]] [[pwning]]. They will eat your liver and blow up your van. That's assuming their intense need to share their [[butthurt]] over their miserable lives hasn't already caused fatal damage to everyone around them.		'''Internet killers''' are a group of l33t h4x0rz intent on causing [[IRL]] [[pwning]]. They will eat your liver and blow up your van. That's assuming their intense need to share their [[butthurt]] over their miserable lives hasn't already caused fatal damage to everyone around them.

	Life. Death. Intar-net. Leading experts in the field consider internet killers to be the martyrs of our generation, having eschewed self-sacrifice in favor of homicide. As the list of internet killers grows steadily with time, many wait patiently for the first internet serial killer, hoping perhaps to be amongst the victims, or enjoy a [[Armin_Meiwes\|romantic penis dinner]].		Life. Death. Intar-net. Leading experts in the field consider internet killers to be the martyrs of our generation, having eschewed self-sacrifice in favor of homicide. As the list of internet killers grows steadily with time, many wait patiently for the first internet serial killer, hoping perhaps to be amongst the victims, or enjoy a [[Armin_Meiwes\|romantic penis dinner]].

	===Brave Prometheus===		== Brave Prometheus ==

	Adventurers swarmed from IRL, as much enemies of the one race as of the other, to cozen, beguile, and use the internet. And at the time, it truly was the internet (singular), because this was back in the day before the other nets had been manufactured in the factories and mills of a young America. It was 1996, and the nation was still reeling from the pain of a great Civil War that had consumed the continent and caused so much stress on the head of the president that it exploded as he watched a heartwarming rendition of Last Action Hero, performed entirely in black face. It was during these halcyon days that [[Sharon Lopatka]], an "internet entrepreneur" too obese to have run a successful porn site posted a request searching for a man to torture and kill her. Although many came forth to answer the call, few actually had the guts to serve their country and keep their word, that is, until Robert Frederick Glass bravely strangled her with a nylon cord after raping and torturing her for a few days.		Adventurers swarmed from IRL, as much enemies of the one race as of the other, to cozen, beguile, and use the internet. And at the time, it truly was the internet (singular), because this was back in the day before the other nets had been manufactured in the factories and mills of a young America. It was 1996, and the nation was still reeling from the pain of a great Civil War that had consumed the continent and caused so much stress on the head of the president that it exploded as he watched a heartwarming rendition of Last Action Hero, performed entirely in black face. It was during these halcyon days that [[Sharon Lopatka]], an "internet entrepreneur" too obese to have run a successful porn site posted a request searching for a man to torture and kill her. Although many came forth to answer the call, few actually had the guts to serve their country and keep their word, that is, until Robert Frederick Glass bravely strangled her with a nylon cord after raping and torturing her for a few days.
Line 10:		Line 12:
	Although both Sharon and Robert lived out their fantasy, only Sharon's would have a happy ending. Robert was later convicted of voluntary manslaughter and was found to be in possession of child pornography, ensuring plenty of shower room sodomy at the hands of HIV infested niggers.		Although both Sharon and Robert lived out their fantasy, only Sharon's would have a happy ending. Robert was later convicted of voluntary manslaughter and was found to be in possession of child pornography, ensuring plenty of shower room sodomy at the hands of HIV infested niggers.

	===Important traits of internet killers===		== Important traits of internet killers ==

	Internet killers have blogs. Nobody [[IRL]] has a blog, so this is the most important means of detecting these killers. If you know someone in the real world who has a blog, they are probably getting ready to kill you. Plz [[buy a dog]] at the next earliest convenience.		Internet killers have blogs. Nobody [[IRL]] has a blog, so this is the most important means of detecting these killers. If you know someone in the real world who has a blog, they are probably getting ready to kill you. Plz [[buy a dog]] at the next earliest convenience.
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	Some killers evade prison by becoming [[an hero]]. Sadly, most of them are too chickenshit to step up and off themselves, so they settle for [[cutting]] and continuing to whine until numerous [[nigra]] [[cock]]s get stuffed in their face and ass in prison.		Some killers evade prison by becoming [[an hero]]. Sadly, most of them are too chickenshit to step up and off themselves, so they settle for [[cutting]] and continuing to whine until numerous [[nigra]] [[cock]]s get stuffed in their face and ass in prison.

	===Future breakthroughs in internet killing===		== Future breakthroughs in internet killing ==

	[[Image:Dr_Who_loves_diz.jpg\|thumb~~\|left~~\|Internet Hate Machine is here to help!]]		[[Image:Dr_Who_loves_diz.jpg\|thumb\|Internet Hate Machine is here to help!]]

	Despite the confusing title, no one has yet managed to kill someone ''via'' the internet. Fortunately, with the aid of the [[Internet Hate Machine]] channeled through the fourth dimensional warp-fields made possible by quantum computing, this is becoming a more likely scenario in the coming decades. And it's about fucking time.		Despite the confusing title, no one has yet managed to kill someone ''via'' the internet. Fortunately, with the aid of the [[Internet Hate Machine]] channeled through the fourth dimensional warp-fields made possible by quantum computing, this is becoming a more likely scenario in the coming decades. And it's about fucking time.

	[[Category:Internet ~~killers~~\| ]]		[[Category:Internet Killers\| ]]
	[[Category:People]]		[[Category:People]]

imported>Lolyunohavgudsoftware at 23:37, 23 October 2015

2015-10-23T23:37:12Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:37, 23 October 2015
Line 5:		Line 5:

	===Brave Prometheus===		===Brave Prometheus===

	Adventurers swarmed from IRL, as much enemies of the one race as of the other, to cozen, beguile, and use the internet. And at the time, it truly was the internet (singular), because this was back in the day before the other nets had been manufactured in the factories and mills of a young America. It was 1996, and the nation was still reeling from the pain of a great Civil War that had consumed the continent and caused so much stress on the head of the president that it exploded as he watched a heartwarming rendition of Last Action Hero, performed entirely in black face. It was during these halcyon days that [[Sharon Lopatka]], an "internet entrepreneur" too obese to have run a successful porn site posted a request searching for a man to torture and kill her. Although many came forth to answer the call, few actually had the guts to serve their country and keep their word, that is, until Robert Frederick Glass bravely strangled her with a nylon cord after raping and torturing her for a few days.		Adventurers swarmed from IRL, as much enemies of the one race as of the other, to cozen, beguile, and use the internet. And at the time, it truly was the internet (singular), because this was back in the day before the other nets had been manufactured in the factories and mills of a young America. It was 1996, and the nation was still reeling from the pain of a great Civil War that had consumed the continent and caused so much stress on the head of the president that it exploded as he watched a heartwarming rendition of Last Action Hero, performed entirely in black face. It was during these halcyon days that [[Sharon Lopatka]], an "internet entrepreneur" too obese to have run a successful porn site posted a request searching for a man to torture and kill her. Although many came forth to answer the call, few actually had the guts to serve their country and keep their word, that is, until Robert Frederick Glass bravely strangled her with a nylon cord after raping and torturing her for a few days.

Line 10:		Line 11:

	===Important traits of internet killers===		===Important traits of internet killers===

	Internet killers have blogs. Nobody [[IRL]] has a blog, so this is the most important means of detecting these killers. If you know someone in the real world who has a blog, they are probably getting ready to kill you. Plz [[buy a dog]] at the next earliest convenience.		Internet killers have blogs. Nobody [[IRL]] has a blog, so this is the most important means of detecting these killers. If you know someone in the real world who has a blog, they are probably getting ready to kill you. Plz [[buy a dog]] at the next earliest convenience.

	If the killer is under the age of twenty, they invariably use either [[tumblr]] or [[Facebook]] to whine about how hard their middle-class, suburbanite lives are and to make themselves feel popular. Older killers typically hang out on [[Usenet]]s, [[blogger]], or communicate the old fashioned way - through [[email]].		If the killer is under the age of twenty, they invariably use either [[tumblr]] or [[Facebook]] to whine about how hard their middle-class, suburbanite lives are and to make themselves feel popular. Older killers typically hang out on [[Usenet]]s, [[blogger]], or communicate the old fashioned way: through [[email]].

	All internet killers are [[furfag]]s or [[otherkin]]. Sometimes both. They often kill to act out their bestial fantasies, citing insurmountable supernatural forces and insisting that they are not subject to human laws due to their superiority as a magical being.		All internet killers are [[furfag]]s or [[otherkin]]. Sometimes both. They often kill to act out their bestial fantasies, citing insurmountable supernatural forces and insisting that they are not subject to human laws due to their superiority as a magical being.
Line 19:		Line 21:

	===Future breakthroughs in internet killing===		===Future breakthroughs in internet killing===

	[[Image:Dr_Who_loves_diz.jpg\|thumb\|left\|Internet Hate Machine is here to help!]]		[[Image:Dr_Who_loves_diz.jpg\|thumb\|left\|Internet Hate Machine is here to help!]]

	Despite the confusing title, no one has yet managed to kill someone ''via'' the internet. Fortunately, with the aid of the [[Internet Hate Machine]] channeled through the fourth dimensional warp-fields made possible by quantum computing, this is becoming a more likely scenario in the coming decades. And it's about fucking time.		Despite the confusing title, no one has yet managed to kill someone ''via'' the internet. Fortunately, with the aid of the [[Internet Hate Machine]] channeled through the fourth dimensional warp-fields made possible by quantum computing, this is becoming a more likely scenario in the coming decades. And it's about fucking time.

			[[Category:Internet killers\| ]]
	[[Category:People]]		[[Category:People]]

imported>Zew0: changed myspace and lj references to something current

2015-05-30T04:19:50Z

changed myspace and lj references to something current

← Older revision		Revision as of 04:19, 30 May 2015
(No difference)

imported>Zew0: changed myspace and lj references to something current

2015-05-30T04:19:50Z

changed myspace and lj references to something current

← Older revision		Revision as of 04:19, 30 May 2015
(No difference)

imported>Zew0: changed myspace and lj references to something current

2015-05-30T04:19:50Z

changed myspace and lj references to something current

← Older revision		Revision as of 04:19, 30 May 2015
(No difference)

imported>Zew0: changed myspace and lj references to something current

2015-05-30T04:19:50Z

changed myspace and lj references to something current

← Older revision		Revision as of 04:19, 30 May 2015
Line 1:		Line 1:

	{{Killers}}		{{Killers}}
	'''Internet killers''' are a group of l33t h4x0rz intent on causing [[IRL]] [[pwning]]. They will eat your liver and blow up your van. That's assuming their intense need to share their [[butthurt]] over their miserable lives hasn't already caused fatal damage to everyone around them.		'''Internet killers''' are a group of l33t h4x0rz intent on causing [[IRL]] [[pwning]]. They will eat your liver and blow up your van. That's assuming their intense need to share their [[butthurt]] over their miserable lives hasn't already caused fatal damage to everyone around them.
Line 13:		Line 12:
	Internet killers have blogs. Nobody [[IRL]] has a blog, so this is the most important means of detecting these killers. If you know someone in the real world who has a blog, they are probably getting ready to kill you. Plz [[buy a dog]] at the next earliest convenience.		Internet killers have blogs. Nobody [[IRL]] has a blog, so this is the most important means of detecting these killers. If you know someone in the real world who has a blog, they are probably getting ready to kill you. Plz [[buy a dog]] at the next earliest convenience.

	If the killer is under the age of twenty, they invariably use either [[~~LiveJournal~~]] or [[~~MySpace~~]] to whine about how hard their middle-class, suburbanite lives are and to make themselves feel popular. Older killers typically hang out on [[Usenet]]s, [[blogger]], or communicate the old fashioned way - through [[email]].		If the killer is under the age of twenty, they invariably use either [[tumblr]] or [[Facebook]] to whine about how hard their middle-class, suburbanite lives are and to make themselves feel popular. Older killers typically hang out on [[Usenet]]s, [[blogger]], or communicate the old fashioned way - through [[email]].

	All internet killers are [[furfag]]s or [[otherkin]]. Sometimes both. They often kill to act out their bestial fantasies, citing insurmountable supernatural forces and insisting that they are not subject to human laws due to their superiority as a magical being.		All internet killers are [[furfag]]s or [[otherkin]]. Sometimes both. They often kill to act out their bestial fantasies, citing insurmountable supernatural forces and insisting that they are not subject to human laws due to their superiority as a magical being.

imported>Mantequilla: Reverted edits by H64 (talk) to last revision by Unknown

2011-10-31T20:33:00Z

Reverted edits by H64 (talk) to last revision by Unknown

← Older revision		Revision as of 20:33, 31 October 2011
Line 24:		Line 24:
	Despite the confusing title, no one has yet managed to kill someone ''via'' the internet. Fortunately, with the aid of the [[Internet Hate Machine]] channeled through the fourth dimensional warp-fields made possible by quantum computing, this is becoming a more likely scenario in the coming decades. And it's about fucking time.		Despite the confusing title, no one has yet managed to kill someone ''via'' the internet. Fortunately, with the aid of the [[Internet Hate Machine]] channeled through the fourth dimensional warp-fields made possible by quantum computing, this is becoming a more likely scenario in the coming decades. And it's about fucking time.

			[[Category:People]]
	~~{{Slept with rubberduc}}~~

imported>H64: replacing :category:People with template:Slept with rubberduc

2011-10-31T07:33:28Z

replacing category:People with template:Slept with rubberduc

← Older revision		Revision as of 07:33, 31 October 2011
Line 24:		Line 24:
	Despite the confusing title, no one has yet managed to kill someone ''via'' the internet. Fortunately, with the aid of the [[Internet Hate Machine]] channeled through the fourth dimensional warp-fields made possible by quantum computing, this is becoming a more likely scenario in the coming decades. And it's about fucking time.		Despite the confusing title, no one has yet managed to kill someone ''via'' the internet. Fortunately, with the aid of the [[Internet Hate Machine]] channeled through the fourth dimensional warp-fields made possible by quantum computing, this is becoming a more likely scenario in the coming decades. And it's about fucking time.

	~~[[Category:People]]~~
			{{Slept with rubberduc}}

← Older revision		Revision as of 17:37, 16 July 2022
Line 2:		Line 2:
	{{TOCright}}		{{TOCright}}

	'''Internet killers''' are a group of l33t h4x0rz intent on causing [[IRL]] [[pwning]]. They will eat your liver and blow up your van. That's assuming their intense need to share their [[butthurt]] over their miserable lives hasn't already caused fatal damage to everyone around them.		'''Internet killers''' are a group of [[Anonymous\|l33t h4x0rz]] intent on causing [[IRL]] [[pwning]]. They will eat your liver and blow up your van. That's assuming their intense need to share their [[butthurt]] over their miserable lives hasn't already caused fatal damage to everyone around them.

	Life. Death. Intar-net. Leading experts in the field consider internet killers to be the martyrs of our generation, having eschewed self-sacrifice in favor of homicide. As the list of internet killers grows steadily with time, many wait patiently for the first internet serial killer, hoping perhaps to be amongst the victims, or enjoy a [[Armin_Meiwes\|romantic penis dinner]].		Life. Death. Intar-net. Leading experts in the field consider internet killers to be the martyrs of our generation, having eschewed [[An Hero\|self-sacrifice]] in favor of homicide. As the list of internet killers grows steadily with time, many wait patiently for the first internet [[serial killer]], hoping perhaps to be amongst the victims, or enjoy a [[Armin_Meiwes\|romantic penis dinner]].

	== Brave Prometheus ==		== Brave Prometheus ==

	Adventurers swarmed from IRL, as much enemies of the one race as of the other, to cozen, beguile, and use the internet. And at the time, it truly was the internet (singular), because this was back in the day before the other nets had been manufactured in the factories and mills of a young America. It was 1996, and the nation was still reeling from the pain of a great Civil War that had consumed the continent and caused so much stress on the head of the president that it exploded as he watched a heartwarming rendition of Last Action Hero, performed entirely in black face. It was during these halcyon days that [[Sharon Lopatka]], an "internet entrepreneur" too obese to have run a successful porn site posted a request searching for a man to torture and kill her. Although many came forth to answer the call, few actually had the guts to serve their country and keep their word, that is, until Robert Frederick Glass bravely strangled her with a nylon cord after raping and torturing her for a few days.		Adventurers swarmed from IRL, as much enemies of the one race as of the other, to cozen, beguile, and use the internet. And at the time, it truly was the internet (singular), because this was back in the day before the other nets had been manufactured in the factories and mills of a young [[America]]. It was 1996, and the nation was still reeling from the pain of a great Civil War that had consumed the continent and caused so much stress on the head of the president that it exploded as he watched a heartwarming rendition of Last Action Hero, performed entirely in [[Niggers\|black face]]. It was during these halcyon days that [[Sharon Lopatka]], an "internet entrepreneur" too obese to have run a successful [[porn]] site posted a request searching for a man to torture and kill her. Although many came forth to answer the call, few actually had the guts to serve their country and keep their word, that is, until Robert Frederick Glass bravely strangled her with a nylon cord after [[raping]] and torturing her for a few days.

	Although both Sharon and Robert lived out their fantasy, only Sharon's would have a happy ending. Robert was later convicted of voluntary manslaughter and was found to be in possession of child pornography, ensuring plenty of shower room sodomy at the hands of HIV infested niggers.		Although both Sharon and Robert lived out their fantasy, only Sharon's would have a happy ending. Robert was later convicted of voluntary manslaughter and was found to be in possession of [[child pornography]], ensuring plenty of [[Anal rape\|shower room sodomy]] at the hands of [[HIV]] infested niggers.

	== Important traits of internet killers ==		== Important traits of internet killers ==
Line 16:		Line 16:
	Internet killers have blogs. Nobody [[IRL]] has a blog, so this is the most important means of detecting these killers. If you know someone in the real world who has a blog, they are probably getting ready to kill you. Plz [[buy a dog]] at the next earliest convenience.		Internet killers have blogs. Nobody [[IRL]] has a blog, so this is the most important means of detecting these killers. If you know someone in the real world who has a blog, they are probably getting ready to kill you. Plz [[buy a dog]] at the next earliest convenience.

	If the killer is under the age of twenty, they invariably use either [[tumblr]] or [[Facebook]] to whine about how hard their middle-class, suburbanite lives are and to make themselves feel popular. Older killers typically hang out on [[Usenet]]s, [[blogger]], or communicate the old fashioned way: through [[email]].		If the killer is under the age of twenty, they invariably use either [[tumblr]] or [[Facebook]] to whine about how hard their middle-class, suburbanite lives are and to make themselves feel popular. [[Older]] killers typically hang out on [[Usenet]]s, [[blogger]], or communicate the old fashioned way: through [[email]].

	All internet killers are [[furfag]]s or [[otherkin]]. Sometimes both. They often kill to act out their bestial fantasies, citing insurmountable supernatural forces and insisting that they are not subject to human laws due to their superiority as a magical being.		All internet killers are [[furfag]]s or [[otherkin]]. Sometimes both. They often kill to act out their [[bestial]] fantasies, citing insurmountable [[Schizophrenia\|supernatural forces]] and insisting that they are not subject to human laws due to their superiority as a [[Retard\|magical being]].

	Some killers evade prison by becoming [[an hero]]. Sadly, most of them are too chickenshit to step up and off themselves, so they settle for [[cutting]] and continuing to whine until numerous [[nigra]] [[cock]]s get stuffed in their face and ass in prison.		Some killers evade prison by becoming [[an hero]]. Sadly, most of them are too [[chickenshit]] to step up and off themselves, so they settle for [[cutting]] and continuing to whine until numerous [[nigra]] [[cock]]s get stuffed in their face and [[ass]] in [[prison]].

	== Future breakthroughs in internet killing ==		== Future breakthroughs in internet killing ==