Final Fantasy VIII - Revision history

imported>AlGore: /* Gallery of Lulz */

2017-11-19T20:26:48Z

Gallery of Lulz

← Older revision		Revision as of 20:26, 19 November 2017
Line 158:		Line 158:
	Image:Ff8tranny2.jpg		Image:Ff8tranny2.jpg
	Image:Ff8tranny.jpg		Image:Ff8tranny.jpg
			File:FF8 Favorite Game.jpg
	Image:Sailor_Mooooon!.JPG\|The secret last Limit ability, or whatever the fuck they're called.		Image:Sailor_Mooooon!.JPG\|The secret last Limit ability, or whatever the fuck they're called.
	Image:Circumcisionsquall.JPG\|Oh lawds, segregatin' the [[God Hates Fags\|heathens!]]		Image:Circumcisionsquall.JPG\|Oh lawds, segregatin' the [[God Hates Fags\|heathens!]]

imported>Hagibor: /* Doomtrain! */

2017-07-28T05:41:36Z

Doomtrain!

← Older revision		Revision as of 05:41, 28 July 2017
Line 99:		Line 99:

	===[[F40PH\|Doomtrain!]]===		===[[F40PH\|Doomtrain!]]===
	The only manly character in the game. When summoned he kills all your emo characters ~~and~~ you ~~play~~ a new game called "Doomtrain!: Quest for Lulz!" [[Image:doomtrain.jpg\|thumb\|right\|Screenshot of Doomtrain being angry.]]		The only manly character in the game. When summoned he calls forth Don Cornelius to engineer him down the tracks to the sounds of classic [[Retro\|70s]] funk and kills all your emo characters while you start a new game called "Doomtrain!: Quest for Lulz!" [[Image:doomtrain.jpg\|thumb\|right\|Screenshot of Doomtrain being angry.]]

	Is also the crappiest GF evar, since there was no plagiarisms used in the creation process		Is also the crappiest GF evar, since there was no plagiarisms used in the creation process. None at all.

			<center><youtube>zCnKFM3hXEk</youtube></center>

	===Bahamut===		===Bahamut===

imported>Hagibor: /* Difficulty? What difficulty? */

2017-06-07T00:08:13Z

Difficulty? What difficulty?

← Older revision		Revision as of 00:08, 7 June 2017
Line 137:		Line 137:

	==Difficulty? What difficulty?==		==Difficulty? What difficulty?==
	In Final Fantasy VIII, enemy levels are determined by your party's average level. It doesn't take a degree in rocket science to figure out that if you run from every battle and never level up, then the enemies are ridiculously easy throughout all four discs. Oh, and if you kill everyone in your party except for Squall, then those dead party members remain at Level 1 and automatically keep your average level down, so as Squall levels up the monsters' levels are anchored down by your dead party members, basically allowing Squall to become obscenely powerful in comparison to them. And if that doesn't make the game easy enough for you, then how about this: although one normally needs to be at low health in order to access this total game-breaker of an attack called a Limit Break (which allow a character to do [[over 9,000]] damage [[over 9,000]] times within a single turn at no cost to anything in your inventory except for Irvine's ammo), when only one party member is alive the game will let you perform Limit Breaks even at full health -- the same effect as one of the game's most useful spells (Aura) without actually casting it. So you are basically battling monsters that are one-third your level while using the most powerful attacks in the game that were originally intended as a crutch for RPG-[[n00bs]] who can't win boss fights without them because they are too stupid to make effective use of the [[shit\|Junction System]]. Oh, and if you sit down and do nothing but play cards for the first 25 hours of the game, all the while reset-spamming your PlayStation to prevent any and all card losses from every occurring, then you can obtain the endgame weapon on Disc 1, which opens up the most powerful Limit Break in the game, rendering the whole experience of playing Final Fantasy VIII essentially one of walking the globe in total God-mode, [[Star Wars\|taking out low-level forest creatures with the Death Star]].		In Final Fantasy VIII, enemy levels are determined by your party's average level. It doesn't take a degree in rocket science to figure out that if you run from every battle and never level up, then the enemies are ridiculously easy throughout all four discs. Oh, and if you kill everyone in your party except for Squall, then those dead party members remain at Level 1 and automatically keep your average level down, so as Squall levels up the monsters' levels are anchored down by your dead party members, basically allowing Squall to become obscenely powerful in comparison to them. And if that doesn't make the game easy enough for you, then how about this: although one normally needs to be at low health in order to access this total game-breaker of an attack called a Limit Break (which allow a character to do [[over 9,000]] damage [[over 9,000]] times within a single turn at no cost to anything in your inventory except for Irvine's ammo), when only one party member is alive the game will let you perform Limit Breaks even at full health -- the same effect as one of the game's most useful spells (Aura) without actually casting it. So you are basically battling monsters that are one-third your level while using the most powerful attacks in the game that were originally intended as a crutch for RPG-[[n00bs]] who can't win boss fights without them because they are too stupid to make effective use of the [[shit\|Junction System]]. If you don't want to walk around hauling corpses, you could always spam the square button and have a limit break every turn with every character because the programers left that cheat in because they thought Americans needed the extra help. Believe it or not, most fantards will call hauling corpses around as cheating but spamming the square button is A-Ok because the programmers left it in. Oh, and if you sit down and do nothing but play cards for the first 25 hours of the game, all the while reset-spamming your PlayStation to prevent any and all card losses from every occurring, then you can obtain the endgame weapon on Disc 1, which opens up the most powerful Limit Break in the game, rendering the whole experience of playing Final Fantasy VIII essentially one of walking the globe in total God-mode, [[Star Wars\|taking out low-level forest creatures with the Death Star]].

	[[tl;dr]] - The game punishes trying and rewards laziness.		[[tl;dr]] - The game punishes trying and rewards laziness.

imported>Hagibor: /* Squall */

2017-06-06T23:57:12Z

Squall

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:57, 6 June 2017
Line 10:		Line 10:
	==Characters==		==Characters==
	===Squall===		===Squall===
	Squall is one of the shittiest main characters to exist, [[evar]]. His last name is Leonhart, meaning "Lion Heart," meaning "fucking [[furfag]]." The player is supposed to think he's an cool, enigmatic [[an hero\|hero]], but he just comes off as a whiny bitch. [[At least 100]] lines of his dialogue consists of an ellipsis; Sometimes two if he's feeling especially [[Jewish]]. Squall is basically Cloud from [[Final Fantasy 7\|Final Fantasy]] [[over 9000\|9000]] (in which Aeris [[lol\|dies]]), but with brown hair and a scar on his face ~~from being~~ a ~~total~~ [[moot\|pussy]]. The reason he has this is because he sucks with his "[[penis\|gunblade]]" in one of the intro FMV's and gets cut in the face by a baby-eating [[an hero\|superhero]] named Seifer. Of course, every woman loves a guy who loses a fight so this [[azn]] [[whore]] named Rinoa gets fucking wet every time she's around Squall, making the [[13-year-old boy\|13-year-old]] player [[masturbate]] every time she makes the slightest [[Asking for it\|pass at him]].		Squall is one of the shittiest main characters to exist, [[evar]]. His last name is Leonhart, meaning "Lion Heart," meaning "fucking [[furfag]]." The player is supposed to think he's an cool, enigmatic [[an hero\|hero]], but he just comes off as a whiny bitch. [[At least 100]] lines of his dialogue consists of an ellipsis; Sometimes two if he's feeling especially [[Jewish]]. Squall is basically Cloud from [[Final Fantasy 7\|Final Fantasy]] [[over 9000\|9000]] (in which Aeris [[lol\|dies]]), but with brown hair and a scar on his face that is meant to be a metaphor for vagina but all it really does is remind us that he is a [[moot\|pussy]]. The reason he has this scar is because he sucks with his "[[penis\|gunblade]]" in one of the intro FMV's and gets cut in the face by a baby-eating [[an hero\|superhero]] named Seifer. Of course, every woman loves a guy who loses a fight so this [[azn]] [[whore]] named Rinoa gets fucking wet every time she's around Squall, making the [[13-year-old boy\|13-year-old]] player [[masturbate]] every time she makes the slightest [[Asking for it\|pass at him]].

	===Seifer===		===Seifer===

imported>Hagibor: /* Seifer */

2017-06-06T23:53:37Z

Seifer

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:53, 6 June 2017
Line 13:		Line 13:

	===Seifer===		===Seifer===
	A blonde [[German]] guy who considers Squall his best butt-buddy. They both have gunblades, and they both have scars. [[Yaoi]] [[slashfic]] ensues.		A blonde [[German]] guy who considers Squall his best butt-buddy. They both have gunblades, and they both have scars. [[Yaoi]] [[slashfic]] ensues. Sorceress Edea is his mother. I would have said spoilers but most people wont make it far enough in the game to find out that Seifer is going through a major [[Oedipus Complex]] and only wants to protect his mommy or that Laguna Loire is Squall's father

	===Quistis===		===Quistis===

imported>Hagibor: /* Selphie */

2017-06-06T23:44:57Z

Selphie

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:44, 6 June 2017
Line 23:		Line 23:

	===Selphie===		===Selphie===
	A dumb whore who wears a tight spandex skirt/shirt-thing found in a trunk of a strip club. Only technique in battle is swinging her double-chained-[[dildo\|dildos]] at unsuspecting construction workers. [[Asperger's syndrome\|She loves trains]]. One of her character defining moments is when she redirects nuclear missiles from striking the fortified military base she calls home to explode harmlessly in a heavily populated city. Some fanfiction deals with her potential relation to Kefka. Completely useless to play with because if you want her 1 good ability, you'd better grind the first mission you have with her or you will never get it. Also a total [[lesbian\|lesbian]]. she has no tits and sports an ugly 70's hair style. She's portrayed as being clumsy so you can expect a lot of panty shots from her when she trips.		A dumb whore who wears a tight spandex skirt/shirt-thing found in a trunk of a strip club. Only technique in battle is swinging her double-chained-[[dildo\|dildos]] at unsuspecting construction workers. [[Asperger's syndrome\|She loves trains]]. One of her character defining moments is when she redirects nuclear missiles from striking the fortified military base she calls home to explode harmlessly in a heavily populated city. Some fanfiction deals with her potential relation to Kefka. Completely useless to play with because if you want her 1 good ability, you'd better grind the first mission you have with her or you will never get it. Also a total [[lesbian\|lesbian]]. she has no tits and sports an ugly 70's hair style. She's portrayed as being clumsy so you can expect a lot of panty shots from her when she trips, and trust me, because of lazy writing and refusing to give her a more interesting character flaw - she trips a whole fucking lot.

	===Zell===		===Zell===

imported>Hagibor: /* Irvine */

2017-06-06T23:41:56Z

Irvine

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:41, 6 June 2017
Line 31:		Line 31:

	===Irvine===		===Irvine===
	The womanizing/maninizing drunken [[Brokeback Mountain\|cowboy]] who serves absolutely no part in the storyline, other than to act mildly insulted for about half a second upon realizing that all of the other characters are too [[retard\|completely fucking retarded]] to remember growing up with him. Beyond that, just a token character with a gun. A shame he ~~wasn~~'t [[black]].		The womanizing/maninizing drunken [[Brokeback Mountain\|cowboy]] who serves absolutely no part in the storyline, other than to act mildly insulted for about half a second upon realizing that all of the other characters are too [[retard\|completely fucking retarded]] to remember growing up with him. Beyond that, just a token character with a gun. A shame he couldn't have Laguna's machine gun and be [[black]].

	[[Image:Zell.gif\|Zell, everyone's reason for playing this game]]		[[Image:Zell.gif\|Zell, everyone's reason for playing this game]]

imported>Hagibor: /* Selphie */

2017-06-06T23:39:21Z

Selphie

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:39, 6 June 2017
Line 23:		Line 23:

	===Selphie===		===Selphie===
	A dumb whore who wears a tight spandex skirt/shirt-thing found in a trunk of a strip club. Only technique in battle is swinging her double-chained-[[dildo\|dildos]] at unsuspecting construction workers. [[Asperger's syndrome\|She loves trains]]. One of her character defining moments is when she redirects nuclear missiles from striking the fortified military base she calls home to explode harmlessly in a heavily populated city. Some fanfiction deals with her potential relation to Kefka. Also a total [[lesbian\|lesbian]]. she has no tits and sports an ugly 70's hair style		A dumb whore who wears a tight spandex skirt/shirt-thing found in a trunk of a strip club. Only technique in battle is swinging her double-chained-[[dildo\|dildos]] at unsuspecting construction workers. [[Asperger's syndrome\|She loves trains]]. One of her character defining moments is when she redirects nuclear missiles from striking the fortified military base she calls home to explode harmlessly in a heavily populated city. Some fanfiction deals with her potential relation to Kefka. Completely useless to play with because if you want her 1 good ability, you'd better grind the first mission you have with her or you will never get it. Also a total [[lesbian\|lesbian]]. she has no tits and sports an ugly 70's hair style. She's portrayed as being clumsy so you can expect a lot of panty shots from her when she trips.

	===Zell===		===Zell===

imported>Hagibor: /* Quistis */

2017-06-06T23:34:53Z

Quistis

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:34, 6 June 2017
Line 16:		Line 16:

	===Quistis===		===Quistis===
	The sexy, sexy, sexy hermaphrodite teacher who [[Sexual_Harassment\|has the hots]] for her students, like Squall, throughout the game. She constantly tries [[slut\|opening her legs]] to Squall, but Squally dumps her for a dumber bitch. Using a whip Quistis teaches many students about the finer arts of being [[BDSM\|mercenaries]]. Her multitasking abilities are only hampered by the total amount of clothing she is currently wearing.		The sexy, sexy, sexy hermaphrodite teacher who [[Sexual_Harassment\|has the hots]] for her students, like Squall, throughout the game. She constantly tries [[slut\|opening her legs]] to Squall, but Squally is either too dumb or too gay to understand what she's after. Later, Squally dumps her for a dumber trendy fucker [[retard\|fantard]] bitch that thinks it's uber cool to wear angel wings, basicly every other girl that watches [[anime]]. Using a whip Quistis teaches many students about the finer arts of being [[BDSM\|mercenaries]]. Her multitasking abilities are only hampered by the total amount of clothing she is currently wearing.
	[[Image:Quistissex.jpg\|thumb\|right\|Have questions about the junction system? Quistis will walk you through it! Just don't press Triangle!]]		[[Image:Quistissex.jpg\|thumb\|right\|Have questions about the junction system? Quistis will walk you through it! Just don't press Triangle!]]

imported>AlGore: /* Gallery of Lulz */

2017-01-21T09:14:56Z

Gallery of Lulz

← Older revision		Revision as of 09:14, 21 January 2017
Line 162:		Line 162:
	Image:Final_Fantasy_8_03.jpg		Image:Final_Fantasy_8_03.jpg
	Image:Final_Fantasy_8_04.jpg		Image:Final_Fantasy_8_04.jpg
			File:Squall Whatever.jpg
	</gallery>		</gallery>
	\|}}		\|}}