Email - Revision history

imported>Caku at 16:41, 14 August 2021

2021-08-14T16:41:30Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 16:41, 14 August 2021
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	There are 3 kinds of [[Screen name\|email addresses]]:		There are 3 kinds of [[Screen name\|email addresses]]:

	The normal kind with a name and maybe a number ([[Ron Jeremy\|ronjeremy@hotmail.com]]), the [[otherkin\|"other" kind]] ({{@\|yellow_jelly_beans333@hotmail.com}}) and the kind which you just want to sign up for massive amounts of gay porn hint hint ({{@\|speedydvv@gmail.com}})		The normal kind with a name and maybe a number ([[Ron Jeremy\|ronjeremy@hotmail.com]]), the [[otherkin\|"other" kind]] ({{@\|yellow_jelly_beans333\|hotmail.com}}) and the kind which you just want to sign up for massive amounts of gay porn hint hint ({{@\|speedydvv\|gmail.com}})
	<br>		<br>
	<br>		<br>

imported>Sidecar: + intro pic (nigerian prince)

2019-01-28T21:40:16Z

+ intro pic (nigerian prince)

← Older revision		Revision as of 21:40, 28 January 2019
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			{{warning\|text=As of 2006, the government is watching [[Your Email\|your emails]], so you'd better stop e-flirting with that 13 y/o tranny, you fucking pervert.}}
	{{needsmore\|Whores and Spam}}		{{needsmore\|Whores and Spam}}
	~~{{warning~~\|~~text=As~~ of ~~2006~~, the ~~government is watching~~ [[~~Your~~ Email\|~~your emails~~]], so you~~'d better stop e-flirting~~ with that ~~13 y/o tranny,~~ you ~~fucking pervert~~.}}		<br>
			[[File:Pipe-smoking negro sending emails when dinosaurs roamed the earth.jpg\|thumb\|right\|A Nigerian prince, emailing you, yesterday]]
			Email is a service of the [[Internets]] that reminds you what drugs you need to buy to fix the parts of your body that are too small (your [[penis]], [[boobs]] and butt) and the parts that are too big (everything else).

			Email also lets you know about important investment opportunities such as insider stock tips, [[419 Nigerian Email Scams\|super-safe nigerian banking deals]], and totally real Rolex watches. Email is also the only place you can buy peniz pillz, which make your peniz ready for [[surprise sex]]. It is the only medium with which the hundreds of organizations that randomly select an email address to award a cash prize to can contact you.

	Email is a service of the [[Internets]] that reminds you what drugs you need to buy to fix the parts of your body that are too small (your [[penis]], [[boobs]] and butt) and the parts that are too big (everything else). Email also lets you know about important investment opportunities such as insider stock tips, [[419 Nigerian Email Scams\|super-safe nigerian banking deals]], and totally real Rolex watches. Email is also the only place you can buy peniz pillz, which make your peniz ready for [[surprise sex]]. It is the only medium with which the hundreds of organizations that randomly select an email address to award a cash prize to can contact you. Al Gore puts these essential messages in the "Junk" folder to trick you. Sometimes the folder is called "[[Spam]]". This is because email tastes like crap. All other messages are useless and go in the inbox.		Al Gore puts these essential messages in the "Junk" folder to trick you. Sometimes the folder is called "[[Spam]]". This is because email tastes like crap. All other messages are useless and go in the inbox.

	There are 3 kinds of [[Screen name\|email addresses]]:		There are 3 kinds of [[Screen name\|email addresses]]:

	The normal kind with a name and maybe a number ([[Ron Jeremy\|ronjeremy@hotmail.com]]), the [[otherkin\|"other" kind]] ({{@\|yellow_jelly_beans333@hotmail.com}}) and the kind which you just want to sign up for massive amounts of gay porn hint hint ({{@\|speedydvv@gmail.com}})		The normal kind with a name and maybe a number ([[Ron Jeremy\|ronjeremy@hotmail.com]]), the [[otherkin\|"other" kind]] ({{@\|yellow_jelly_beans333@hotmail.com}}) and the kind which you just want to sign up for massive amounts of gay porn hint hint ({{@\|speedydvv@gmail.com}})
	.		<br>
			<br>
			__TOC__
			{{clear}}
	==Beginnings==		==Beginnings==

	In the late 20th century, [[at least 100 years ago]], people finally got hip to the realization that the $3000 486SX Packard Bell PC they bought wouldn't allow them to hack into NORAD's mainframe and start World War III, à la David Lightman in ''Wargames''. Feeling slighted on their costly purchases, they decided to phone up [[Al Gore]], Governor of the [[United States]] of [[Tennessee]], to bug him for a solution. Unfortunately, they couldn't, [[fail\|because Motorola RAZRS hadn't been invented yet]]. So they enlisted the help of introverted, gun-toting, [[murder\|homicidal]]/[[suicidal]] maniacs, also known as the [[terrorist\|U.S. Postal Service]], to pester Gore. Gore answered the prayers of the people and created Skynet. After Skynet blew up the world in a [[lollercaust\|nuclear holocaust]] and created a race of human-killing [[robots]], which were later defeated by John Connor (portrayed in an Oscar-award winning documentary by Edward Furlong), Gore was able to distract the public's attention from this disaster with a new invention known as [[Teh]] [[Internets]]. With the internets came a new method of communication:

	~~Email.~~

	[[Image:gorephone.jpg\|thumb\|Our Lord And Savior, Creator of the Internets, Al Gore.]]		[[Image:gorephone.jpg\|thumb\|Our Lord And Savior, Creator of the Internets, Al Gore.]]
	[[Image:Yergunnagetraped.jpg\|thumb\|Email is a great way to [[CP\|share your pictures]].]]		[[Image:Yergunnagetraped.jpg\|thumb\|Email is a great way to [[CP\|share your pictures]].]]
			[[Image:John_Holmes_Cock.jpg\|thumb\|He's happy with his new internet penis, and you can be too. [[HeadOn\|Apply Directly to the Forehead.]] ]]
			In the late 20th century, [[at least 100 years ago]], people finally got hip to the realization that the $3000 486SX Packard Bell PC they bought wouldn't allow them to hack into NORAD's mainframe and start World War III, à la David Lightman in ''Wargames''. Feeling slighted on their costly purchases, they decided to phone up [[Al Gore]], Governor of the [[United States]] of [[Tennessee]], to bug him for a solution. Unfortunately, they couldn't, [[fail\|because Motorola RAZRS hadn't been invented yet]]. So they enlisted the help of introverted, gun-toting, [[murder\|homicidal]]/[[suicidal]] maniacs, also known as the [[terrorist\|U.S. Postal Service]], to pester Gore. Gore answered the prayers of the people and created Skynet. After Skynet blew up the world in a [[lollercaust\|nuclear holocaust]] and created a race of human-killing [[robots]], which were later defeated by John Connor (portrayed in an Oscar-award winning documentary by Edward Furlong), Gore was able to distract the public's attention from this disaster with a new invention known as [[Teh]] [[Internets]]. With the internets came a new method of communication, and it was called...

			{{RainbowSlant\|Email}}
			<br>
	Bored [[Lesbian bed death\|housewives]] and geriatrics who wanted to look technologically advanced without grasping new concepts jumped on this concept immediately in order to cheaply and effectively communicate with people who had moved far away from them so as to avoid personal contact and interaction with them.		Bored [[Lesbian bed death\|housewives]] and geriatrics who wanted to look technologically advanced without grasping new concepts jumped on this concept immediately in order to cheaply and effectively communicate with people who had moved far away from them so as to avoid personal contact and interaction with them.

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	It has been proven that one can enlarge their [[penis]], [[man]] or [[woman]], by responding to any and all offers sent to them in their emails. This is how John Holmes got his start in the porn industry. Ron Jeremy [[I accidentally X\|accidentally]] responded to the offer incorrectly, mailing his response to someone at [[Nintendo]], and while he got his bigger penis, he was doomed forever to look like [[Mario]].		It has been proven that one can enlarge their [[penis]], [[man]] or [[woman]], by responding to any and all offers sent to them in their emails. This is how John Holmes got his start in the porn industry. Ron Jeremy [[I accidentally X\|accidentally]] responded to the offer incorrectly, mailing his response to someone at [[Nintendo]], and while he got his bigger penis, he was doomed forever to look like [[Mario]].

	~~[[Image:John_Holmes_Cock.jpg\|thumb\|He's happy with his new internet penis, and you can be too. [[HeadOn\|Apply Directly to the Forehead.]] ]]~~

	==Now==		==Now==

imported>MW2UTUBER: Email link templates

2018-10-08T11:45:50Z

Email link templates

← Older revision		Revision as of 11:45, 8 October 2018
Line 6:		Line 6:
	There are 3 kinds of [[Screen name\|email addresses]]:		There are 3 kinds of [[Screen name\|email addresses]]:

	The normal kind with a name and maybe a number ([[Ron Jeremy\|ronjeremy@hotmail.com]]), the [[otherkin\|"other" kind]] (~~[mailto:yellow_jelly_beans333~~@~~hotmail.com~~ yellow_jelly_beans333@hotmail.com]) and the kind which you just want to sign up for massive amounts of gay porn hint hint (~~[mailto:speedydvv~~@~~gmail.com~~ speedydvv@gmail.com])		The normal kind with a name and maybe a number ([[Ron Jeremy\|ronjeremy@hotmail.com]]), the [[otherkin\|"other" kind]] ({{@\|yellow_jelly_beans333@hotmail.com}}) and the kind which you just want to sign up for massive amounts of gay porn hint hint ({{@\|speedydvv@gmail.com}})
	.		.
	==Beginnings==		==Beginnings==

imported>Mu.ollin: Reverted edits by H64 (talk) to last revision by Dustbunny

2011-11-13T01:23:07Z

Reverted edits by H64 (talk) to last revision by Dustbunny

← Older revision		Revision as of 01:23, 13 November 2011
(No difference)

imported>Mu.ollin: Reverted edits by H64 (talk) to last revision by Dustbunny

2011-11-13T01:23:07Z

Reverted edits by H64 (talk) to last revision by Dustbunny

← Older revision		Revision as of 01:23, 13 November 2011
(No difference)

imported>Mu.ollin: Reverted edits by H64 (talk) to last revision by Dustbunny

2011-11-13T01:23:07Z

Reverted edits by H64 (talk) to last revision by Dustbunny

← Older revision	Revision as of 01:23, 13 November 2011
(No difference)

imported>Mu.ollin: Reverted edits by H64 (talk) to last revision by Dustbunny

2011-11-13T01:23:07Z

Reverted edits by H64 (talk) to last revision by Dustbunny

← Older revision		Revision as of 01:23, 13 November 2011
Line 47:		Line 47:

	{{Language}}		{{Language}}
			[[Category: Communicae]] [[Category: Internets Phenomena]]
	[[Category: Internets Phenomena]]

imported>H64: replacing :category:Communicae with

2011-10-31T06:04:31Z

replacing category:Communicae with

← Older revision		Revision as of 06:04, 31 October 2011
Line 47:		Line 47:

	{{Language}}		{{Language}}
	~~[[Category: Communicae]]~~ [[Category: Internets Phenomena]]
			[[Category: Internets Phenomena]]

imported>Dustbunny at 16:46, 30 September 2011

2011-09-30T16:46:14Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 16:46, 30 September 2011
Line 1:		Line 1:
			{{needsmore\|Whores and Spam}}
	{{warning\|text=As of 2006, the government is watching your emails, so you'd better stop e-flirting with that 13 y/o tranny, you fucking pervert.}}		{{warning\|text=As of 2006, the government is watching [[Your Email\|your emails]], so you'd better stop e-flirting with that 13 y/o tranny, you fucking pervert.}}

	Email is a service of the [[Internets]] that reminds you what drugs you need to buy to fix the parts of your body that are too small (your [[penis]], [[boobs]] and butt) and the parts that are too big (everything else). Email also lets you know about important investment opportunities such as insider stock tips, [[419 Nigerian Email Scams\|super-safe nigerian banking deals]], and totally real Rolex watches. Email is also the only place you can buy peniz pillz, which make your peniz ready for [[surprise sex]]. It is the only medium with which the hundreds of organizations that randomly select an email address to award a cash prize to can contact you. Al Gore puts these essential messages in the "Junk" folder to trick you. Sometimes the folder is called "[[Spam]]". This is because email tastes like crap. All other messages are useless and go in the inbox.		Email is a service of the [[Internets]] that reminds you what drugs you need to buy to fix the parts of your body that are too small (your [[penis]], [[boobs]] and butt) and the parts that are too big (everything else). Email also lets you know about important investment opportunities such as insider stock tips, [[419 Nigerian Email Scams\|super-safe nigerian banking deals]], and totally real Rolex watches. Email is also the only place you can buy peniz pillz, which make your peniz ready for [[surprise sex]]. It is the only medium with which the hundreds of organizations that randomly select an email address to award a cash prize to can contact you. Al Gore puts these essential messages in the "Junk" folder to trick you. Sometimes the folder is called "[[Spam]]". This is because email tastes like crap. All other messages are useless and go in the inbox.
Line 42:		Line 42:
	*[[Spam]]		*[[Spam]]
	*[[BCC]]		*[[BCC]]
			*[[Your Email]]

	{{clear}}		{{clear}}
	~~{{needsmore\|Whores and Spam}}~~
	{{Language}}		{{Language}}
	[[Category: Communicae]] [[Category: Internets Phenomena]]		[[Category: Communicae]] [[Category: Internets Phenomena]]

imported>Unknown: Created page with " {{warning|text=As of 2006, the government is watching your emails, so you'd better stop e-flirting with that 13 y/o tranny, you fucking pervert.}} Email is a service of the [[I..."

2011-04-16T03:19:11Z

Created page with " {{warning|text=As of 2006, the government is watching your emails, so you'd better stop e-flirting with that 13 y/o tranny, you fucking pervert.}} Email is a service of the [[I..."

New page

{{warning|text=As of 2006, the government is watching your emails, so you'd better stop e-flirting with that 13 y/o tranny, you fucking pervert.}}

Email is a service of the [[Internets]] that reminds you what drugs you need to buy to fix the parts of your body that are too small (your [[penis]], [[boobs]] and butt) and the parts that are too big (everything else). Email also lets you know about important investment opportunities such as insider stock tips, [[419 Nigerian Email Scams|super-safe nigerian banking deals]], and totally real Rolex watches. Email is also the only place you can buy peniz pillz, which make your peniz ready for [[surprise sex]]. It is the only medium with which the hundreds of organizations that randomly select an email address to award a cash prize to can contact you. Al Gore puts these essential messages in the "Junk" folder to trick you. Sometimes the folder is called "[[Spam]]". This is because email tastes like crap. All other messages are useless and go in the inbox.

There are 3 kinds of [[Screen name|email addresses]]:

The normal kind with a name and maybe a number ([[Ron Jeremy|ronjeremy@hotmail.com]]), the [[otherkin|"other" kind]] ([mailto:yellow_jelly_beans333@hotmail.com yellow_jelly_beans333@hotmail.com]) and the kind which you just want to sign up for massive amounts of gay porn *hint* *hint* ([mailto:speedydvv@gmail.com speedydvv@gmail.com])
.
==Beginnings==

In the late 20th century, [[at least 100 years ago]], people finally got hip to the realization that the $3000 486SX Packard Bell PC they bought wouldn't allow them to hack into NORAD's mainframe and start World War III, à la David Lightman in ''Wargames''. Feeling slighted on their costly purchases, they decided to phone up [[Al Gore]], Governor of the [[United States]] of [[Tennessee]], to bug him for a solution. Unfortunately, they couldn't, [[fail|because Motorola RAZRS hadn't been invented yet]]. So they enlisted the help of introverted, gun-toting, [[murder|homicidal]]/[[suicidal]] maniacs, also known as the [[terrorist|U.S. Postal Service]], to pester Gore. Gore answered the prayers of the people and created Skynet. After Skynet blew up the world in a [[lollercaust|nuclear holocaust]] and created a race of human-killing [[robots]], which were later defeated by John Connor (portrayed in an Oscar-award winning documentary by Edward Furlong), Gore was able to distract the public's attention from this disaster with a new invention known as [[Teh]] [[Internets]]. With the internets came a new method of communication:

Email.

[[Image:gorephone.jpg|thumb|Our Lord And Savior, Creator of the Internets, Al Gore.]]
[[Image:Yergunnagetraped.jpg|thumb|Email is a great way to [[CP|share your pictures]].]]

Bored [[Lesbian bed death|housewives]] and geriatrics who wanted to look technologically advanced without grasping new concepts jumped on this concept immediately in order to cheaply and effectively communicate with people who had moved far away from them so as to avoid personal contact and interaction with them.

The original implementation of email was involved typing a message out on your computer, packing it in cardboard and Styrofoam peanuts, and shipping it via UPS to the person you wanted to talk to. They would then type out their reply on your computer and send it back. Unfortunately, the recipients of the message usually never sent the computer back, leaving the owner SOL.

Then some [[basement dweller|lonely soul]] created a program called Lynx, which could only be used on [[Linux]]. This was the turning point in communications. It meant that sending a whole computer was no longer necessary. With Lynx, it was possible to send ugly, garbled ASCII messages to loved ones/[[Internet stalking|stalking]] targets, and was, for a while, confined only to Linux users, who reveled in the glory that they could implement a system of communication based on an operating system no one cared about or wanted to learn how to use, even if it was free.

==Windows==

[[Satan]] created the concept of teh [[Windows]] email with a Virus called [[MySpace]]. It cost [[I see what you did there|$666]] per month and incurred several surcharges on a user's credit card, all the while implanting thoughts of suicide, pre-marital [[sex]], and investment banking in one's head. The drawbacks were immense, but it did allow Windows 3.1 users to actually ''send'' email without having to learn Linux, therefore giving up all human interaction, becoming obese, losing their hair, adopting glasses and suspenders as their daily fashion choices, and having sex with [[furries]] and [[underage]] [[cutters]] as normal, everyday activity. Realizing that this would probably work better in a mass market, Satan removed all Satanic things in his [[virus]], and called it [[AOL|America Online]].

Even though big corporations now own [[AOL]] and have apparently [[lie|cleaned it up]], they've left the [[pedophilia]] and [[girl#girls|internet crossdressing]] in, and you can still hear Satan's voice saying, "You've Got Mail!"

==Penis Enlargement==

It has been proven that one can enlarge their [[penis]], [[man]] or [[woman]], by responding to any and all offers sent to them in their emails. This is how John Holmes got his start in the porn industry. Ron Jeremy [[I accidentally X|accidentally]] responded to the offer incorrectly, mailing his response to someone at [[Nintendo]], and while he got his bigger penis, he was doomed forever to look like [[Mario]].

[[Image:John_Holmes_Cock.jpg|thumb|He's happy with his new internet penis, and you can be too. [[HeadOn|Apply Directly to the Forehead.]] ]]

==Now==

Today, [[over 9000|bazillions of]] people take advantage of the great things email can offer. Free [[IPOD|iPods]], [[video games|PSP's]], [[penis]] enlargement, [[Viagra]] clones, and [[basement dweller|working at home]] are some of the wonderful things you too can experience with this [[awesome]] tool. Unfortunately, so-called "[[spam]] filters" are being implemented by obvious [[Communist]] elements, who would like nothing better than to rob us of these perks.
==See Also==
*[[Spam]]
*[[BCC]]

{{clear}}
{{needsmore|Whores and Spam}}
{{Language}}
[[Category: Communicae]] [[Category: Internets Phenomena]]