David Cameron - Revision history

HellenicTrapstar: Reverted edit by Edgar181's sock puppet 6 (talk) to last revision by imported>ElSegCunt

2024-08-20T13:18:24Z

Reverted edit by Edgar181's sock puppet 6 (talk) to last revision by [[User:imported>ElSegCunt|imported>ElSegCunt]]

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Edgar181's sock puppet 6 at 11:44, 20 August 2024

2024-08-20T11:44:21Z

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imported>ElSegCunt: /* Controversy */

2018-07-11T00:23:07Z

Controversy

← Older revision		Revision as of 00:23, 11 July 2018
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	==[[Controversy]]==		==[[Controversy]]==
	[[File:David-Cameron.jpg\|thumb]]		[[File:David-Cameron.jpg\|thumb]]
	*"Dave" is strongly suspected to have coked up back in his university days after dodging questions about it on television. As a rich, white, old Etonian though this shouldn’t have taken people by surprise. However, seeing as Dave was proposing a crackdown on [[Drug\|cocaine]] users this angered some people. The few intelligent people in England were angered however at the general public being surprised that Dave is a cokehead or a hypocrite. Cocaine is cool anyway though, so back teh fuck off dude.		*"Dave" is strongly suspected to have coked up back in his university days after dodging questions about it on television. As a rich, white, old Etonian though this shouldn’t have taken people by surprise. However, seeing as Dave was proposing a crackdown on [[Drug\|cocaine]] users this angered some people. The few intelligent people in England were angered however at the general public being surprised that Dave is a cokehead or a hypocrite. Cocaine is [[shit\|cool]] anyway though, so back teh fuck off dude.
	*"Dave" was a member of the controversial Bullingdon Dining Club, a group of posh elitist twats that act as the British version of the [[Illuminati\|Skull and Bones society]], making him in essence a more inbred, British version of [[George W Bush]].		*"Dave" was a member of the controversial Bullingdon Dining Club, a group of posh, elitist twats that act as the British version of the [[Illuminati\|Skull and Bones society]], making him in essence a more inbred, British version of [[George W Bush]].
	*Many political commentators have compared David to Tony Blair over his lack of political opinions and need to be perceived as cool. Some have gone so far as to call "Dave" a Blair clone. Well fucking done Sherlocks.		*Many political commentators have compared David to Tony Blair over his lack of political opinions and need to be perceived as cool. Some have gone so far as to call "Dave" a Blair clone. Well fucking done, Sherlocks.
	*In a eerie coincidence with the first episode of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Black_Mirror_episodes Black Mirror] while in Oxford David Cameron [http://www.express.co.uk/news/politics/606695/David-Cameron-dead-pig-private-part-Oxford-University-student-Prime-Minister stuck his greasy cock in a dead pig's mouth] and someone out there haz pix.		*In a eerie coincidence with the first episode of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Black_Mirror_episodes Black Mirror] while in Oxford David Cameron [http://www.express.co.uk/news/politics/606695/David-Cameron-dead-pig-private-part-Oxford-University-student-Prime-Minister], stuck his greasy cock in a dead pig's mouth] and someone out there haz pix.
	*After it was leaked to the News of the World newspaper that "Dave" once bought a copy of Hulk Hogan’s rap album Macho Man Randy Savage has targeted "Dave" for death in his vendetta against the Hulkster. Because of this, Dave's people had Macho Man Randy Savage killed.		*After it was leaked to the News of the World newspaper that "Dave" once bought a copy of Hulk Hogan’s rap album Macho Man Randy Savage has targeted "Dave" for death in his vendetta against the Hulkster. Because of this, Dave's people had Macho Man Randy Savage killed.
	*He [[trying_too_hard\|tries too hard]] to be just like your [[sick_fuck\|average bloke]], when he's really just an [[emo]] toff		*He [[trying_too_hard\|tries too hard]] to be just like your [[sick_fuck\|average bloke]], when he's really just an [[emo]] toff.
	*Probably stole Gordon's glass eyeball to make him feel like a right [[chav\|dick]] at the UN.		*Probably stole Gordon's glass eyeball to make him feel like a right [[chav\|dick]] at the UN.
	*"Dave" thinks that [[pedophilia]] is exactly the same thing as [[homosexuality]].		*"[[cunt\|Dave]]" thinks that [[pedophilia]] is exactly the same thing as [[homosexuality]].

	=="Dave" on Conservatism==		=="Dave" on Conservatism==

imported>ElSegCunt: /* Rise to power */

2018-07-11T00:16:44Z

Rise to power

← Older revision		Revision as of 00:16, 11 July 2018
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	[[Image:Cameron-bullingdon-dining-club2 468x420.jpg\|thumb\|left\|Young Dave with some [[rich\|ordinary]], working class [[cunts\|people]], who later took over the UK]]		[[Image:Cameron-bullingdon-dining-club2 468x420.jpg\|thumb\|left\|Young Dave with some [[rich\|ordinary]], working class [[cunts\|people]], who later took over the UK]]
	Prior to the 2005 general erection "Dave" used to snatch children away in the night for Tory leader Count Dracula. Despite Count Dracula championing popular [[British]] issues such as crime, [[education]], [[cricket]] and driving the independent state of <strike>Leicest India</strike> Multinationalistan (archaically known as Leicester, which is now an utter shit-hole, [[Shit_nobody_cares_about\|I know because I live there]]) into the sea he had an ulterior motive for becoming Prime Minister. It was his true aim to unleash the demonic powers of the Hellmouth situated under 10 Downing Street to bring about the destruction of the world. However, [[Tony Blair]], Guardian of the Hellmouth, was able to destroy Count Dracula with help from his Slayer, Cherie Blair, and the Tories were defeated.		Prior to the 2005 general erection "Dave" used to snatch children away in the night for Tory leader Count Dracula. Despite Count Dracula championing popular [[British]] issues such as crime, [[education]], [[cricket]] and driving the independent state of <strike>Leicest India</strike> Multinationalistan (archaically known as Leicester, which is now an utter shit-hole, [[Shit_nobody_cares_about\|I know because I live there.]]) into the sea he had an ulterior motive for becoming Prime Minister. It was his true aim to unleash the demonic powers of the [[Cthulhu\|Hellmouth]] situated under 10 Downing Street to bring about the destruction of the world. However, [[Tony Blair]], Guardian of the Hellmouth, was able to destroy Count Dracula with help from his Slayer, Cherie Blair, and the Tories were defeated.

	With a vacuum of power now at the top of the Tory Party, ambitious "Dave" was able to mount a challenge for leadership. He was originally mocked for going for the leadership with critics pointing to the lack of any political opinions of his own and having a weak, pale and flabby face, the kind you just want to punch. As the weeks passed though and potential leaders were voted out of the [[Big_Brother\|Big Brother]] house by the public, "Dave" was still hanging on. "Dave" managed to reach Week 11 and in the final defeated [[Zombie\|Enoch Powell]] and Geordie 70s dancer Anthony to emerge victorious. He was then, in a grand ceremony, installed with all the customary [[Magick\|magic powers]] of the Tory leader by being anointed in the blood of [[Margaret_Thatcher\|Margaret Thatcher]] by Lord Voldemort. Hes fucking epic and yo know it.		With a vacuum of power now at the top of the Tory Party, ambitious "Dave" was able to mount a challenge for leadership. He was originally mocked for going for the leadership with critics pointing to the lack of any political opinions of his own and having a weak, pale and flabby face, the kind you just want to punch. As the weeks passed though and potential leaders were voted out of the [[Big_Brother\|Big Brother]] house by the public, "Dave" was still hanging on. "Dave" managed to reach Week 11 and in the final defeated [[Zombie\|Enoch Powell]] and Geordie 70s dancer Anthony to emerge victorious. He was then, in a grand ceremony, installed with all the customary [[Magick\|magic powers]] of the Tory leader by being anointed in the blood of [[Margaret_Thatcher\|Margaret Thatcher]] by Lord Voldemort. Hes fucking epic and yo know it.

imported>ElSegCunt: /* DC = "Did coke" */

2018-07-11T00:13:54Z

DC = "Did coke"

← Older revision		Revision as of 00:13, 11 July 2018
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	He was even [http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/david-cameron-asked-cocaine-use-2814183 asked about his charlie-chasing in Parliament] and refused to answer.		He was even [http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/david-cameron-asked-cocaine-use-2814183 asked about his charlie-chasing in Parliament] and refused to answer.

	'''Pls to be noting''': by "charlie-chasing in Parliament" we do most emphatically not mean that Mr Cameron is alleged to have snorted fairy-dust in the hallowed chambers of the Mother of Democracy itself. That would be very wrong indeed, and there is absolutely [[lies\|no evidence]] to connect Mr Cameron to the fact that [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2362866/Corridors-powder-Drug-scandal-Houses-Parliament-traces-cocaine-toilets-Palace-Westminster.html Parliamentary toilets have been proven as boltholes for elected and taxpayer-funded cokeheads].		'''Pls to be noting''': by "charlie-chasing in Parliament" we do most emphatically not mean that Mr Cameron is alleged to have snorted fairy-dust in the hallowed chambers of the Mother of Democracy itself. That would be very wrong indeed, and there is absolutely [[lies\|no evidence]] to connect Mr Cameron due to the fact that [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2362866/Corridors-powder-Drug-scandal-Houses-Parliament-traces-cocaine-toilets-Palace-Westminster.html Parliamentary toilets have been proven as boltholes for elected and taxpayer-funded cokeheads].

	The real culprits, therefore, remain unidentified.		The real culprits, therefore, remain unidentified.

imported>Sidecar: /* 'Dave' Is Cool */

2016-11-15T19:51:15Z

'Dave' Is Cool

← Older revision		Revision as of 19:51, 15 November 2016
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	=='Dave' Is Cool==		=='Dave' Is Cool==
			[[File:David cameron looks like a train.jpg\|right\|160px\|thumb\|Dave is a [[YouTube Thomas Club\|YT Thomas Club]] member]]
	'Dave' recognizes that because the British public are so [[inbred]], [[retarded\|mentally deficient]] and ignorant it doesn’t matter what policies he has and as such, he has none. What matters is that he is perceived as being [[cool]]. This theory is supported by Coolometer readings of [[Over_9000\|over 9,000]] [[Fonzie\|MicroFonzies]] for Tony Blair in the run-up to the 1997 General Election, which he won in a landslide, compared to the reading of 6.4 MicroFonzies for John Major. Dave was said to have been emitting readings of around 7,500 MicroFonzies as of September 2006 showing his increasing popularity.		'Dave' recognizes that because the British public are so [[inbred]], [[retarded\|mentally deficient]] and ignorant it doesn’t matter what policies he has and as such, he has none. What matters is that he is perceived as being [[cool]]. This theory is supported by Coolometer readings of [[Over_9000\|over 9,000]] [[Fonzie\|MicroFonzies]] for Tony Blair in the run-up to the 1997 General Election, which he won in a landslide, compared to the reading of 6.4 MicroFonzies for John Major. Dave was said to have been emitting readings of around 7,500 MicroFonzies as of September 2006 showing his increasing popularity.

imported>Tim Yenmore at 07:09, 1 July 2016

2016-07-01T07:09:08Z

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	[[File:ImagesCA97HMG0.jpg\|thumb\|right\|conservitive-liberal = oxy-moron]]		[[File:ImagesCA97HMG0.jpg\|thumb\|right\|conservitive-liberal = oxy-moron]]

	The Right Honourable '''~~[[Cunt\|~~David~~]] “Just call me Dave”~~ Cameron''' is the ~~jerk~~ who stuck his dick into a dead pig and managed to destroy the United Kingdom while trying to fix it in 2016. Just over one year into his second term of office, he held a gun to his own head and said: "Vote for me or I pull the trigger." The public crept up behind him and shouted "BOO!" and he shat himself and pulled the trigger by accident. Britain decided to leave the [[EU]], [[Scotland]] decided to leave the [[UK]], thousands of [[English]] people decided to leave England and millions of immigrants realised that they were eventually going to be leaving something-or-other.		The Right Honourable '''David Levita Cameron'''{{Jew}} is the bloke who stuck his dick into a dead pig and managed to destroy the United Kingdom while trying to fix it in 2016. Just over one year into his second term of office, he held a gun to his own head and said: "Vote for me or I pull the trigger." The public crept up behind him and shouted "BOO!" and he shat himself and pulled the trigger by accident. Britain decided to leave the [[EU]], [[Scotland]] decided to leave the [[UK]], thousands of [[English]] people decided to leave England and millions of immigrants realised that they were eventually going to be leaving something-or-other.

	His [[John Major\|major]] mistake was allowing his party to spend several decades telling the public that all their problems were caused by being in the EU (immigrants, poverty, unemployment, immigrants, daft laws about bananas, immigrants, and immigrants; roughly in that order), and then expecting people to vote to keep Britain in the EU. He now enters the history books a few rungs below [[WWII\|Neville Chamberlain]] in terms of disastrous prime ministers - and even [[Tony Blair]] is said to be grinning with relief. But then, he grins at everything, like a wanking Jap.		His [[John Major\|major]] mistake was allowing his party to spend several decades telling the public that all their problems were caused by being in the EU (immigrants, poverty, unemployment, immigrants, daft laws about bananas, immigrants, and immigrants; roughly in that order), and then expecting people to vote to keep Britain in the EU. He now enters the history books a few rungs below [[WWII\|Neville Chamberlain]] in terms of disastrous prime ministers - and even [[Tony Blair]] is said to be grinning with relief. But then, he grins at everything, like a wanking Jap.

imported>Sidecar at 21:54, 27 June 2016

2016-06-27T21:54:24Z

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	{{quote\|'''Why should I do all the hard shit?'''\|David Cameron, 24 June 2016, [http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/eu-referendum-brexit-resignation-david-cameron-reportedly-asks-aides-why-should-i-do-the-hard-st-a7102431.html quitting right after destroying the UK]}}<br>		{{quote\|'''Why should I do all the hard shit?'''\|David Cameron, 24 June 2016, [http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/eu-referendum-brexit-resignation-david-cameron-reportedly-asks-aides-why-should-i-do-the-hard-st-a7102431.html quitting right after destroying the UK]}}<br>

	[[File:~~What A Fucking Cunt~~.jpg\|thumb\|left\|~~What a fucking cunt.~~]]		[[File:Cameron's brexit sadface.jpg\|thumb\|left\|So, how's that all working out?]]
	[[File:cameron_notwant.jpg\|thumb\|right\|Dave smells poor people]]		[[File:cameron_notwant.jpg\|thumb\|right\|Dave smells poor people]]
			[[File:What A Fucking Cunt.jpg\|thumb\|right\|What a fucking cunt.]]
	[[File:Majoron.jpg\|thumb\|A Tory PM destroyed by Europe? [[John Major\|Oh, yes!]]]]		[[File:Majoron.jpg\|thumb\|A Tory PM destroyed by Europe? [[John Major\|Oh, yes!]]]]
	[[File:ImagesCA97HMG0.jpg\|thumb\|right\|conservitive-liberal = oxy-moron]]		[[File:ImagesCA97HMG0.jpg\|thumb\|right\|conservitive-liberal = oxy-moron]]

imported>Sidecar at 20:32, 27 June 2016

2016-06-27T20:32:50Z

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	{{spoiler\|he only had to hold two referendums and [[Brexit\|he did them in the wrong order]]}}<br>		{{spoiler\|he only had to hold two referendums and [[Brexit\|he did them in the wrong order]]}}<br>
	[[File:David cameron facepalm.jpg\|thumb\|center\|500px\|David Cameron's [[Facepalm\|face]] when 24 June 2016]]		[[File:David cameron facepalm.jpg\|thumb\|center\|500px\|David Cameron's [[Facepalm\|face]] when 24 June 2016]]
	{{quote\|'''~~[[Freudian slip\|We Tories resent~~ the ~~poor]]~~'''\|David Cameron, [http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/~~conservative~~-~~party~~-~~conference~~-david-cameron-~~accidentally~~-~~says~~-~~tories~~-~~resent~~-the-~~poor~~-~~9768106~~.html ~~Conservative Party Conference speech, 1 October 2014~~]}}		{{quote\|'''Why should I do all the hard shit?'''\|David Cameron, 24 June 2016, [http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/eu-referendum-brexit-resignation-david-cameron-reportedly-asks-aides-why-should-i-do-the-hard-st-a7102431.html quitting right after destroying the UK]}}<br>

	[[File:What A Fucking Cunt.jpg\|thumb\|left\|What a fucking cunt.]]		[[File:What A Fucking Cunt.jpg\|thumb\|left\|What a fucking cunt.]]
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	He was leader of the [[Tory\|Tories]] (also known as the [[4chan\|Party of Evil]] or [[anon\|Party of First Born Baby Killers]]) and is charged with making the [[Lemonparty\|Lemon Party]] a.k.a. Labour and [[Gordon Brown]] look like a God in comparison to his own [[Faggotry\|incompetence]]. He has been successful in causing a double dip and appointing of [[goatse\|Bum Nose]] [[George Osborne\|Gideon Osborne]] as Chancellor.		He was leader of the [[Tory\|Tories]] (also known as the [[4chan\|Party of Evil]] or [[anon\|Party of First Born Baby Killers]]) and is charged with making the [[Lemonparty\|Lemon Party]] a.k.a. Labour and [[Gordon Brown]] look like a God in comparison to his own [[Faggotry\|incompetence]]. He has been successful in causing a double dip and appointing of [[goatse\|Bum Nose]] [[George Osborne\|Gideon Osborne]] as Chancellor.
			{{quote\|'''[[Freudian slip\|We Tories resent the poor]]'''\|David Cameron, [http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/conservative-party-conference-david-cameron-accidentally-says-tories-resent-the-poor-9768106.html Conservative Party Conference speech, 1 October 2014]}}

	On May 12th, 2010, he didn't win the General election but still he became the new Prime Minister of the UK thanks to the Jews (also known as the [[drugs\|Liberal Democrat Party]]). You see, he didn't have enough Parliamentary seats for a clearcut majority so he's only now living in 10 Downing Street courtesy of [[Nick Clegg]] aka [[jesus\|Judas Iscariot]], who sold his soul to the Devil for 10 pieces of silver and a [[blowjob]] from David Cameron's wife, [[tv\|Samantha Cameron]] a.k.a [[man\|Horse Face]]. Clegg the leader of the [[pussies\|Liberal Democrat]] Party who squeaked out a paltry amount of seats in the election that was enough for Clegg to play cockblocker in allowing Cameron to reign supreme. After all, [[Retard\|why bother]] deciding on the future of one of the most powerful countries in the world when [[Shit\|X Factor]] is coming on?		On May 12th, 2010, he didn't win the General election but still he became the new Prime Minister of the UK thanks to the Jews (also known as the [[drugs\|Liberal Democrat Party]]). You see, he didn't have enough Parliamentary seats for a clearcut majority so he's only now living in 10 Downing Street courtesy of [[Nick Clegg]] aka [[jesus\|Judas Iscariot]], who sold his soul to the Devil for 10 pieces of silver and a [[blowjob]] from David Cameron's wife, [[tv\|Samantha Cameron]] a.k.a [[man\|Horse Face]]. Clegg the leader of the [[pussies\|Liberal Democrat]] Party who squeaked out a paltry amount of seats in the election that was enough for Clegg to play cockblocker in allowing Cameron to reign supreme. After all, [[Retard\|why bother]] deciding on the future of one of the most powerful countries in the world when [[Shit\|X Factor]] is coming on?

imported>McBastard: /* Controversy */

2016-06-27T19:24:19Z

Controversy

← Older revision		Revision as of 19:24, 27 June 2016
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	*"Dave" was a member of the controversial Bullingdon Dining Club, a group of posh elitist twats that act as the British version of the [[Illuminati\|Skull and Bones society]], making him in essence a more inbred, British version of [[George W Bush]].		*"Dave" was a member of the controversial Bullingdon Dining Club, a group of posh elitist twats that act as the British version of the [[Illuminati\|Skull and Bones society]], making him in essence a more inbred, British version of [[George W Bush]].
	*Many political commentators have compared David to Tony Blair over his lack of political opinions and need to be perceived as cool. Some have gone so far as to call "Dave" a Blair clone. Well fucking done Sherlocks.		*Many political commentators have compared David to Tony Blair over his lack of political opinions and need to be perceived as cool. Some have gone so far as to call "Dave" a Blair clone. Well fucking done Sherlocks.
	*In a eerie coincidence with the first episode of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Black_Mirror_episodes Black Mirror] while in Oxford David Cameron [http://www.express.co.uk/news/politics/606695/David-Cameron-dead-pig-private-part-Oxford-University-student-Prime-Minister stuck his greasy cock in a dead pig's mouth, and someone out there haz pix.		*In a eerie coincidence with the first episode of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Black_Mirror_episodes Black Mirror] while in Oxford David Cameron [http://www.express.co.uk/news/politics/606695/David-Cameron-dead-pig-private-part-Oxford-University-student-Prime-Minister stuck his greasy cock in a dead pig's mouth] and someone out there haz pix.
	*After it was leaked to the News of the World newspaper that "Dave" once bought a copy of Hulk Hogan’s rap album Macho Man Randy Savage has targeted "Dave" for death in his vendetta against the Hulkster. Because of this, Dave's people had Macho Man Randy Savage killed.		*After it was leaked to the News of the World newspaper that "Dave" once bought a copy of Hulk Hogan’s rap album Macho Man Randy Savage has targeted "Dave" for death in his vendetta against the Hulkster. Because of this, Dave's people had Macho Man Randy Savage killed.
	*He [[trying_too_hard\|tries too hard]] to be just like your [[sick_fuck\|average bloke]], when he's really just an [[emo]] toff		*He [[trying_too_hard\|tries too hard]] to be just like your [[sick_fuck\|average bloke]], when he's really just an [[emo]] toff

← Older revision		Revision as of 00:16, 11 July 2018
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	[[Image:Cameron-bullingdon-dining-club2 468x420.jpg\|thumb\|left\|Young Dave with some [[rich\|ordinary]], working class [[cunts\|people]], who later took over the UK]]		[[Image:Cameron-bullingdon-dining-club2 468x420.jpg\|thumb\|left\|Young Dave with some [[rich\|ordinary]], working class [[cunts\|people]], who later took over the UK]]
	Prior to the 2005 general erection "Dave" used to snatch children away in the night for Tory leader Count Dracula. Despite Count Dracula championing popular [[British]] issues such as crime, [[education]], [[cricket]] and driving the independent state of <strike>Leicest India</strike> Multinationalistan (archaically known as Leicester, which is now an utter shit-hole, [[Shit_nobody_cares_about\|I know because I live there]]) into the sea he had an ulterior motive for becoming Prime Minister. It was his true aim to unleash the demonic powers of the Hellmouth situated under 10 Downing Street to bring about the destruction of the world. However, [[Tony Blair]], Guardian of the Hellmouth, was able to destroy Count Dracula with help from his Slayer, Cherie Blair, and the Tories were defeated.		Prior to the 2005 general erection "Dave" used to snatch children away in the night for Tory leader Count Dracula. Despite Count Dracula championing popular [[British]] issues such as crime, [[education]], [[cricket]] and driving the independent state of <strike>Leicest India</strike> Multinationalistan (archaically known as Leicester, which is now an utter shit-hole, [[Shit_nobody_cares_about\|I know because I live there.]]) into the sea he had an ulterior motive for becoming Prime Minister. It was his true aim to unleash the demonic powers of the [[Cthulhu\|Hellmouth]] situated under 10 Downing Street to bring about the destruction of the world. However, [[Tony Blair]], Guardian of the Hellmouth, was able to destroy Count Dracula with help from his Slayer, Cherie Blair, and the Tories were defeated.

	With a vacuum of power now at the top of the Tory Party, ambitious "Dave" was able to mount a challenge for leadership. He was originally mocked for going for the leadership with critics pointing to the lack of any political opinions of his own and having a weak, pale and flabby face, the kind you just want to punch. As the weeks passed though and potential leaders were voted out of the [[Big_Brother\|Big Brother]] house by the public, "Dave" was still hanging on. "Dave" managed to reach Week 11 and in the final defeated [[Zombie\|Enoch Powell]] and Geordie 70s dancer Anthony to emerge victorious. He was then, in a grand ceremony, installed with all the customary [[Magick\|magic powers]] of the Tory leader by being anointed in the blood of [[Margaret_Thatcher\|Margaret Thatcher]] by Lord Voldemort. Hes fucking epic and yo know it.		With a vacuum of power now at the top of the Tory Party, ambitious "Dave" was able to mount a challenge for leadership. He was originally mocked for going for the leadership with critics pointing to the lack of any political opinions of his own and having a weak, pale and flabby face, the kind you just want to punch. As the weeks passed though and potential leaders were voted out of the [[Big_Brother\|Big Brother]] house by the public, "Dave" was still hanging on. "Dave" managed to reach Week 11 and in the final defeated [[Zombie\|Enoch Powell]] and Geordie 70s dancer Anthony to emerge victorious. He was then, in a grand ceremony, installed with all the customary [[Magick\|magic powers]] of the Tory leader by being anointed in the blood of [[Margaret_Thatcher\|Margaret Thatcher]] by Lord Voldemort. Hes fucking epic and yo know it.

← Older revision		Revision as of 07:09, 1 July 2016
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	[[File:ImagesCA97HMG0.jpg\|thumb\|right\|conservitive-liberal = oxy-moron]]		[[File:ImagesCA97HMG0.jpg\|thumb\|right\|conservitive-liberal = oxy-moron]]

	The Right Honourable '''~~[[Cunt\|~~David~~]] “Just call me Dave”~~ Cameron''' is the ~~jerk~~ who stuck his dick into a dead pig and managed to destroy the United Kingdom while trying to fix it in 2016. Just over one year into his second term of office, he held a gun to his own head and said: "Vote for me or I pull the trigger." The public crept up behind him and shouted "BOO!" and he shat himself and pulled the trigger by accident. Britain decided to leave the [[EU]], [[Scotland]] decided to leave the [[UK]], thousands of [[English]] people decided to leave England and millions of immigrants realised that they were eventually going to be leaving something-or-other.		The Right Honourable '''David Levita Cameron'''{{Jew}} is the bloke who stuck his dick into a dead pig and managed to destroy the United Kingdom while trying to fix it in 2016. Just over one year into his second term of office, he held a gun to his own head and said: "Vote for me or I pull the trigger." The public crept up behind him and shouted "BOO!" and he shat himself and pulled the trigger by accident. Britain decided to leave the [[EU]], [[Scotland]] decided to leave the [[UK]], thousands of [[English]] people decided to leave England and millions of immigrants realised that they were eventually going to be leaving something-or-other.

	His [[John Major\|major]] mistake was allowing his party to spend several decades telling the public that all their problems were caused by being in the EU (immigrants, poverty, unemployment, immigrants, daft laws about bananas, immigrants, and immigrants; roughly in that order), and then expecting people to vote to keep Britain in the EU. He now enters the history books a few rungs below [[WWII\|Neville Chamberlain]] in terms of disastrous prime ministers - and even [[Tony Blair]] is said to be grinning with relief. But then, he grins at everything, like a wanking Jap.		His [[John Major\|major]] mistake was allowing his party to spend several decades telling the public that all their problems were caused by being in the EU (immigrants, poverty, unemployment, immigrants, daft laws about bananas, immigrants, and immigrants; roughly in that order), and then expecting people to vote to keep Britain in the EU. He now enters the history books a few rungs below [[WWII\|Neville Chamberlain]] in terms of disastrous prime ministers - and even [[Tony Blair]] is said to be grinning with relief. But then, he grins at everything, like a wanking Jap.

← Older revision		Revision as of 21:54, 27 June 2016
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	{{quote\|'''Why should I do all the hard shit?'''\|David Cameron, 24 June 2016, [http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/eu-referendum-brexit-resignation-david-cameron-reportedly-asks-aides-why-should-i-do-the-hard-st-a7102431.html quitting right after destroying the UK]}}<br>		{{quote\|'''Why should I do all the hard shit?'''\|David Cameron, 24 June 2016, [http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/eu-referendum-brexit-resignation-david-cameron-reportedly-asks-aides-why-should-i-do-the-hard-st-a7102431.html quitting right after destroying the UK]}}<br>

	[[File:~~What A Fucking Cunt~~.jpg\|thumb\|left\|~~What a fucking cunt.~~]]		[[File:Cameron's brexit sadface.jpg\|thumb\|left\|So, how's that all working out?]]
	[[File:cameron_notwant.jpg\|thumb\|right\|Dave smells poor people]]		[[File:cameron_notwant.jpg\|thumb\|right\|Dave smells poor people]]
			[[File:What A Fucking Cunt.jpg\|thumb\|right\|What a fucking cunt.]]
	[[File:Majoron.jpg\|thumb\|A Tory PM destroyed by Europe? [[John Major\|Oh, yes!]]]]		[[File:Majoron.jpg\|thumb\|A Tory PM destroyed by Europe? [[John Major\|Oh, yes!]]]]
	[[File:ImagesCA97HMG0.jpg\|thumb\|right\|conservitive-liberal = oxy-moron]]		[[File:ImagesCA97HMG0.jpg\|thumb\|right\|conservitive-liberal = oxy-moron]]

← Older revision		Revision as of 20:32, 27 June 2016
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	{{spoiler\|he only had to hold two referendums and [[Brexit\|he did them in the wrong order]]}}<br>		{{spoiler\|he only had to hold two referendums and [[Brexit\|he did them in the wrong order]]}}<br>
	[[File:David cameron facepalm.jpg\|thumb\|center\|500px\|David Cameron's [[Facepalm\|face]] when 24 June 2016]]		[[File:David cameron facepalm.jpg\|thumb\|center\|500px\|David Cameron's [[Facepalm\|face]] when 24 June 2016]]
	{{quote\|'''~~[[Freudian slip\|We Tories resent~~ the ~~poor]]~~'''\|David Cameron, [http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/~~conservative~~-~~party~~-~~conference~~-david-cameron-~~accidentally~~-~~says~~-~~tories~~-~~resent~~-the-~~poor~~-~~9768106~~.html ~~Conservative Party Conference speech, 1 October 2014~~]}}		{{quote\|'''Why should I do all the hard shit?'''\|David Cameron, 24 June 2016, [http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/eu-referendum-brexit-resignation-david-cameron-reportedly-asks-aides-why-should-i-do-the-hard-st-a7102431.html quitting right after destroying the UK]}}<br>

	[[File:What A Fucking Cunt.jpg\|thumb\|left\|What a fucking cunt.]]		[[File:What A Fucking Cunt.jpg\|thumb\|left\|What a fucking cunt.]]
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	He was leader of the [[Tory\|Tories]] (also known as the [[4chan\|Party of Evil]] or [[anon\|Party of First Born Baby Killers]]) and is charged with making the [[Lemonparty\|Lemon Party]] a.k.a. Labour and [[Gordon Brown]] look like a God in comparison to his own [[Faggotry\|incompetence]]. He has been successful in causing a double dip and appointing of [[goatse\|Bum Nose]] [[George Osborne\|Gideon Osborne]] as Chancellor.		He was leader of the [[Tory\|Tories]] (also known as the [[4chan\|Party of Evil]] or [[anon\|Party of First Born Baby Killers]]) and is charged with making the [[Lemonparty\|Lemon Party]] a.k.a. Labour and [[Gordon Brown]] look like a God in comparison to his own [[Faggotry\|incompetence]]. He has been successful in causing a double dip and appointing of [[goatse\|Bum Nose]] [[George Osborne\|Gideon Osborne]] as Chancellor.
			{{quote\|'''[[Freudian slip\|We Tories resent the poor]]'''\|David Cameron, [http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/conservative-party-conference-david-cameron-accidentally-says-tories-resent-the-poor-9768106.html Conservative Party Conference speech, 1 October 2014]}}

	On May 12th, 2010, he didn't win the General election but still he became the new Prime Minister of the UK thanks to the Jews (also known as the [[drugs\|Liberal Democrat Party]]). You see, he didn't have enough Parliamentary seats for a clearcut majority so he's only now living in 10 Downing Street courtesy of [[Nick Clegg]] aka [[jesus\|Judas Iscariot]], who sold his soul to the Devil for 10 pieces of silver and a [[blowjob]] from David Cameron's wife, [[tv\|Samantha Cameron]] a.k.a [[man\|Horse Face]]. Clegg the leader of the [[pussies\|Liberal Democrat]] Party who squeaked out a paltry amount of seats in the election that was enough for Clegg to play cockblocker in allowing Cameron to reign supreme. After all, [[Retard\|why bother]] deciding on the future of one of the most powerful countries in the world when [[Shit\|X Factor]] is coming on?		On May 12th, 2010, he didn't win the General election but still he became the new Prime Minister of the UK thanks to the Jews (also known as the [[drugs\|Liberal Democrat Party]]). You see, he didn't have enough Parliamentary seats for a clearcut majority so he's only now living in 10 Downing Street courtesy of [[Nick Clegg]] aka [[jesus\|Judas Iscariot]], who sold his soul to the Devil for 10 pieces of silver and a [[blowjob]] from David Cameron's wife, [[tv\|Samantha Cameron]] a.k.a [[man\|Horse Face]]. Clegg the leader of the [[pussies\|Liberal Democrat]] Party who squeaked out a paltry amount of seats in the election that was enough for Clegg to play cockblocker in allowing Cameron to reign supreme. After all, [[Retard\|why bother]] deciding on the future of one of the most powerful countries in the world when [[Shit\|X Factor]] is coming on?