Baseball - Revision history

imported>Shapilier: /* 2004: MLB Kills Expos */

2019-03-10T18:50:48Z

2004: MLB Kills Expos

← Older revision		Revision as of 18:50, 10 March 2019
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	== 2004: MLB Kills Expos ==		== 2004: MLB Kills Expos ==
	The Montreal Expos was perhaps the [[fact\|greatest baseball team ever made]], which would rival its [[1337\|English-speaking]] neighbors the [[Bird\|Toronto Blue Jays]]. It had stars such as Tim Wallach, Tim Rains, Tim Burke, Tim Foli, Larry Walker (not a Tim ironically), and Pedro Martinez. In all seriousness, they averaged about two million fans per year in the 1980's, ranking them in the top five overall. But 1994 saw a player's strike where all of them became [[butthurt]] over the fact that they were being paid a few million bucks and not a few more million bucks each fucking year. So, baseball cut the season short, then decided it didn't like [[Canadians]] and killed the Expos' cash flow. They were forced to get rid of a lot of their players for [[crap]]. Crowds started to dwindle, owners were hired who would rather [[masturbate\|masturbate to a mountee fucking a duck]] than run a team, and baseball continuously blamed the Spos for all their problems. So, in 2003, baseball (illegally) bought the team from the then-illegal owner Jeff Loria, made them play in [[Mexico\|Puerto Rico]] and refused them to make any call-ups that year, despite the team being in first place as late as August. Baseball then moved the Expos to Washington and branded them with the gayest name in professional sports: the [[fags\|Nationals]]. It's the third time Washington's had a team, and [[shit no one cares about\|still no one cares]].		The Montreal Expos was perhaps the [[fact\|greatest baseball team ever made]], which would rival its [[1337\|English-speaking]] neighbors the [[Bird\|Toronto Blue Jays]]. It had stars such as Tim Wallach, Tim Rains, Tim Burke, Tim Foli, Larry Walker (not a Tim ironically), and Pedro Martinez. In all seriousness, they averaged about two million fans per year in the 1980's, ranking them in the top five overall. But 1994 saw a player's strike where all of them became [[butthurt]] over the fact that they were being paid a few million bucks and not a few more million bucks each fucking year. So, baseball cut the season short, then decided it didn't like [[Canadians]] and killed the Expos' cash flow. They were forced to get rid of a lot of their players for [[crap]]. Crowds started to dwindle, owners were hired who would rather [[masturbate\|masturbate to a mountee fucking a duck]] than run a team, and baseball continuously blamed the Spos for all their problems. So, in 2003, baseball (illegally) bought the team from the then-illegal owner Jeff Loria, made them play in [[Mexico\|Puerto Rico]] and refused them to make any call-ups that year, despite the team being in first place as late as August. Baseball then moved the Expos to Washington and branded them with the gayest name in professional sports: the [[fags\|Nationals]]. It's the third time Washington's had a team, and [[shit no one cares about\|still no one cares]]. Until suddenly the Nationals went through an infinite loop of either choking the NLDS or barely beijg able to qualify. [[Will this perpetual state of misery]] continue? Perhaps.

	== Roid Era ==		== Roid Era ==

imported>Cobaltcat: /* Gallery of Baseball */

2018-01-23T11:23:41Z

Gallery of Baseball

← Older revision		Revision as of 11:23, 23 January 2018
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	== Gallery of Baseball ==		== Gallery of Baseball ==
	{{cg\|\|baseballgallery\|center\|<gallery>		{{cg\|Don't go to the ballgame\|baseballgallery\|center\|<gallery>
	File:Children Baseball.gif		File:Children Baseball.gif
	Image:Baseballrule34.jpg\|There's a reason why people don't watch [[wapanese]] baseball.		Image:Baseballrule34.jpg\|There's a reason why people don't watch [[wapanese]] baseball.
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	File:Rustykuntz.jpg		File:Rustykuntz.jpg
	File:Slipnslide Baseball.jpg		File:Slipnslide Baseball.jpg
			File:BatFlying.jpg
	</gallery>}}		</gallery>}}

imported>Cobaltcat: /* Gallery of Baseball */

2016-09-18T11:51:19Z

Gallery of Baseball

← Older revision		Revision as of 11:51, 18 September 2016
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	Image:Bbbatdildo.jpg		Image:Bbbatdildo.jpg
	File:Rustykuntz.jpg		File:Rustykuntz.jpg
			File:Slipnslide Baseball.jpg
	</gallery>}}		</gallery>}}

imported>VX: /* External Links */

2015-09-06T17:59:35Z

External Links

← Older revision		Revision as of 17:59, 6 September 2015
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	== External Links ==		== External Links ==
	*[http://www.mlb.com Obvious site is obvious]		*[http://www.mlb.com Obvious site is obvious]
	*[http://www.knucklecurve.com/category/roid-rage/ Roid Rage claims another]		*<s>[http://www.knucklecurve.com/category/roid-rage/ Roid Rage claims another]</s>
	*{{twitter\|JoseCanseco\|@JoseCanseco}} - The juiced up meathead writes some incoherent and hilarious tweets		*{{twitter\|JoseCanseco\|@JoseCanseco}} - The juiced up meathead writes some incoherent and hilarious tweets

	{{Olympics}}		{{Olympics}}
	[[Category:Gaming]]		[[Category:Gaming]]

imported>CheapNigerian at 20:55, 6 September 2014

2014-09-06T20:55:02Z

← Older revision	Revision as of 20:55, 6 September 2014
(No difference)

imported>CheapNigerian at 20:55, 6 September 2014

2014-09-06T20:55:02Z

← Older revision	Revision as of 20:55, 6 September 2014
(No difference)

imported>CheapNigerian at 20:55, 6 September 2014

2014-09-06T20:55:02Z

← Older revision	Revision as of 20:55, 6 September 2014
(No difference)

imported>CheapNigerian at 20:55, 6 September 2014

2014-09-06T20:55:02Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 20:55, 6 September 2014
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	[[File:ThrowBat.gif\|right\|frame\|This gets you bonus points in baseball.]]		[[File:ThrowBat.gif\|right\|frame\|This gets you bonus points in baseball.]]

	Regarded as the cure for insomnia, '''baseball''' is a sport [[at least 100]] years old that involves fun things to do with bats and balls. You can swing a [[dildo\|bat]]. You can hit a ball. You can catch a ball. You can throw a ball. You can watch people catch, throw, and hit balls. It is an incredibly exciting game, lasting for on average three hours of your life that will never come back. The game would actually go faster if the players didn't provide extra talent at no cost, such as [[STD\|scratching themselves]], juicing up, and spitting a load of [[shit]] on the field. And the teams do this over 150 times each year, just in case the first ten games were wayyy too exciting for the common viewer.		Regarded as the cure for insomnia, '''baseball''' is a sport [[at least 100]] years old that involves fun things to do with bats and white balls. You can swing a [[dildo\|bat]]. You can hit a ball. You can catch a ball. You can throw a ball. You can watch people catch, throw, and hit balls. It is an incredibly exciting game, lasting for on average three hours of your life that will never come back. The game would actually go faster if the players didn't provide extra talent at no cost, such as [[STD\|scratching themselves]], juicing up, and spitting a load of [[shit]] on the field. And the teams do this over 150 times each year, just in case the first ten games were wayyy too exciting for the common viewer.

	There's baseball all around the world, but it's most popular in [[Japan]] and the [[United States\|U.S.A...U.S.A.]], with other major [[pirates\|constituents]] in the Caribbean. This article will focus mainly on American baseball since [[Japs\|waps]] do very few things well and their sport is just too [[boring]] (not enough McGwire's and Barroids, [[amirite]]?).		There's baseball all around the world, but it's most popular in [[Japan]] and the [[United States\|U.S.A...U.S.A.]], with other major [[pirates\|constituents]] in the Caribbean. This article will focus mainly on American baseball since [[Japs\|waps]] do very few things well and their sport is just too [[boring]] (not enough McGwire's and Barroids, [[amirite]]?).

imported>Mrmarsh9 at 18:04, 2 February 2014

2014-02-02T18:04:20Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 18:04, 2 February 2014
Line 2:		Line 2:
	[[File:ThrowBat.gif\|right\|frame\|This gets you bonus points in baseball.]]		[[File:ThrowBat.gif\|right\|frame\|This gets you bonus points in baseball.]]

	Regarded as the cure for insomnia, '''baseball''' is a sport [[at least 100]] years old ~~and~~ involves fun things to do with bats and balls. You can swing a [[dildo\|bat]]. You can hit a ball. You can catch a ball. You can throw a ball. You can watch people catch, throw, and hit balls. It is an incredibly exciting game, lasting for on average three hours of your life that will never come back. The game would actually go faster if the players didn't provide extra talent at no cost, such as [[STD\|scratching themselves]], juicing up, and spitting a load of [[shit]] on the field. And the teams do this over 150 times each year, just in case the first ten games were wayyy too exciting for the common viewer.		Regarded as the cure for insomnia, '''baseball''' is a sport [[at least 100]] years old that involves fun things to do with bats and balls. You can swing a [[dildo\|bat]]. You can hit a ball. You can catch a ball. You can throw a ball. You can watch people catch, throw, and hit balls. It is an incredibly exciting game, lasting for on average three hours of your life that will never come back. The game would actually go faster if the players didn't provide extra talent at no cost, such as [[STD\|scratching themselves]], juicing up, and spitting a load of [[shit]] on the field. And the teams do this over 150 times each year, just in case the first ten games were wayyy too exciting for the common viewer.

	There's baseball all around the world, but it's most popular in [[Japan]] and the [[United States\|U.S.A...U.S.A.]], with other major [[pirates\|constituents]] in the Caribbean ~~love~~. This article will focus mainly on American baseball since [[Japs\|waps]] do very ~~little~~ things well and their sport is just too [[boring]] (not enough McGwire's and Barroids, [[amirite]]?).		There's baseball all around the world, but it's most popular in [[Japan]] and the [[United States\|U.S.A...U.S.A.]], with other major [[pirates\|constituents]] in the Caribbean. This article will focus mainly on American baseball since [[Japs\|waps]] do very few things well and their sport is just too [[boring]] (not enough McGwire's and Barroids, [[amirite]]?).

	== Early Years ==		== Early Years ==
	~~Baseball has its~~ origins ~~dating~~ way back to ancient Egypt, but who cares about what they did. Officially, it was invented by Abner Doubleday, and the first professional ball club formed [[last Thursday\|twenty years later in 1869]], called the Cincinnati [[Commies\|Reds]]. For a while, there was nothing. Some teams would come and go, players would hit balls and kill other players, fans would sit in coliseums and watch the players as they battled lions, tigers, cubs, pirates, [[native American\|Indians]], slews of birds, beaneaters, and various trolls dressed in different colored socks. All of this was for the [[Hitler\|president]], who would sit in the stands and determine which players fight which. When a player was subdued, the loser "struck out" after a baseball bat to the noggin. Much disorder was witnessed, and many brave ballplayers sacrificed their very beings battling epically in these death matches that would make a ''Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles'' episode look more pathetic than what it actually is.		Baseballs origins go way back to ancient Egypt, but who cares about what they did. Officially, it was invented by Abner Doubleday, and the first professional ball club formed [[last Thursday\|twenty years later in 1869]], called the Cincinnati [[Commies\|Reds]]. For a while, there was nothing. Some teams would come and go, players would hit balls and kill other players, fans would sit in coliseums and watch the players as they battled lions, tigers, cubs, pirates, [[native American\|Indians]], slews of birds, beaneaters, and various trolls dressed in different colored socks. All of this was for the [[Hitler\|president]], who would sit in the stands and determine which players fight which. When a player was subdued, the loser "struck out" after a baseball bat to the noggin. Much disorder was witnessed, and many brave [[faggots\|ballplayers]] sacrificed their very beings battling epically in these death matches that would make a ''Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles'' episode look more pathetic than what it actually is.

	The chaos ended in 1901, when the American League formed alongside the National League. Some teams were destroyed, some where kept, others were [[God\|created]]. One such created team was in Pittsburgh, where they literally stole a few key players from other teams and named themselves the Pirates (srsly, [[Do it faggot\|look it up]]). They happened to win baseball's first championship. They were also in the first World Series played two years later when [[Boston\|Bahhhstin]] beat them 5-3 (and without relying on a senator too!).		The chaos ended in 1901, when the American League formed alongside the National League. Some teams were destroyed, some where kept, others were [[God\|created]]. One such created team was in Pittsburgh, where they literally stole a few key players from other teams and named themselves the Pirates (srsly, [[Do it faggot\|look it up]]). They happened to win baseball's first championship. They were also in the first World Series played two years later when [[Boston\|Bahhhstin]] beat them 5-3 (and without relying on a senator too!).
Line 51:		Line 51:

	[[Image:Ha-ha-barroid.jpg\|thumb\|250px\|No caption needed.]]		[[Image:Ha-ha-barroid.jpg\|thumb\|250px\|No caption needed.]]
	Nope, no roids there. As a matter of fact, baseball did an "investigation" lead by congress, specifically a US Senator named George Mitchell, who also owned the [[trolls\|Red Sox]]. A few years passed, and allegations ~~flied~~ back and forth. Towards the end of the 2007 season, when his beloved Red Sox were on the verge of losing a game seven to the Cleveland Indians, Mitchell in ever-classy way released that the Indians' Starter Paul Byrd had been "illegally" taking HGH. About twenty-four hours later, when the Red Sox [[Hax\|won]], it was proven Byrd did in fact have permission by MLB to take the drugs. Mitchell then went on to say Matt Holiday, star Left Fielder of the World Series team Colorado Rockies also took HGH, but this was dropped because Mitchell didn't want to look too much like an [[ass]].		Nope, no roids there. As a matter of fact, baseball did an "investigation" lead by congress, specifically a US Senator named George Mitchell, who also owned the [[trolls\|Red Sox]]. A few years passed, and allegations flew back and forth. Towards the end of the 2007 season, when his beloved Red Sox were on the verge of losing a game seven to the Cleveland Indians, Mitchell in his ever-classy way released that the Indians' Starter Paul Byrd had been "illegally" taking HGH. About twenty-four hours later, when the Red Sox [[Hax\|won]], it was proven Byrd did in fact have permission by MLB to take the drugs. Mitchell then went on to say Matt Holiday, star Left Fielder of the World Series team Colorado Rockies also took HGH, but this was dropped because Mitchell didn't want to look too much like an [[ass]].

	The roid investigation was released in December 2007 as the Mitchell Report (cause Mitchell did everything in it, MMKAY?). The report, which was basically one huge [[TL;DR]], named stars [[lie\|everyone knows about]] such as FP Santangelo, Randy Velarde, and Marvin Bernard. And the Red Sox were basically the only team not to have a current player listed in the report. It seems as though players like David Ortiz just woke up one day and had muscles...[[ATHF\|must be something in the water]]. Roger Clemens was also named in the report, as was Jason Giambi, but in Clemen's report, so the papers read, [[retarded\|he took roids when he pitched in Toronto, went off them when he moved back to Boston, then went on them again when he signed to New York]]. But so far, there's been no retribution for this [[faggotry]].		The roid investigation was released in December 2007 as the Mitchell Report (cause Mitchell did everything in it, MMKAY?). The report, which was basically one huge [[TL;DR]], named stars [[lie\|everyone knows about]] such as FP Santangelo, Randy Velarde, and Marvin Bernard. And the Red Sox were basically the only team not to have a current player listed in the report. It seems as though players like David Ortiz just woke up one day and had muscles...[[ATHF\|must be something in the water]]. Roger Clemens was also named in the report, as was Jason Giambi, but in Clemen's report, so the papers read, [[retarded\|he took roids when he pitched in Toronto, went off them when he moved back to Boston, then went on them again when he signed to New York]]. But so far, there's been no retribution for this [[faggotry]].

imported>Disassemblyline: /* External Links */

2013-08-16T23:21:27Z

External Links

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:21, 16 August 2013
Line 97:		Line 97:
	*[http://www.mlb.com Obvious site is obvious]		*[http://www.mlb.com Obvious site is obvious]
	*[http://www.knucklecurve.com/category/roid-rage/ Roid Rage claims another]		*[http://www.knucklecurve.com/category/roid-rage/ Roid Rage claims another]
			*{{twitter\|JoseCanseco\|@JoseCanseco}} - The juiced up meathead writes some incoherent and hilarious tweets

	{{Olympics}}		{{Olympics}}
	[[Category:Gaming]]		[[Category:Gaming]]

← Older revision		Revision as of 20:55, 6 September 2014
Line 2:		Line 2:
	[[File:ThrowBat.gif\|right\|frame\|This gets you bonus points in baseball.]]		[[File:ThrowBat.gif\|right\|frame\|This gets you bonus points in baseball.]]

	Regarded as the cure for insomnia, '''baseball''' is a sport [[at least 100]] years old that involves fun things to do with bats and balls. You can swing a [[dildo\|bat]]. You can hit a ball. You can catch a ball. You can throw a ball. You can watch people catch, throw, and hit balls. It is an incredibly exciting game, lasting for on average three hours of your life that will never come back. The game would actually go faster if the players didn't provide extra talent at no cost, such as [[STD\|scratching themselves]], juicing up, and spitting a load of [[shit]] on the field. And the teams do this over 150 times each year, just in case the first ten games were wayyy too exciting for the common viewer.		Regarded as the cure for insomnia, '''baseball''' is a sport [[at least 100]] years old that involves fun things to do with bats and white balls. You can swing a [[dildo\|bat]]. You can hit a ball. You can catch a ball. You can throw a ball. You can watch people catch, throw, and hit balls. It is an incredibly exciting game, lasting for on average three hours of your life that will never come back. The game would actually go faster if the players didn't provide extra talent at no cost, such as [[STD\|scratching themselves]], juicing up, and spitting a load of [[shit]] on the field. And the teams do this over 150 times each year, just in case the first ten games were wayyy too exciting for the common viewer.

	There's baseball all around the world, but it's most popular in [[Japan]] and the [[United States\|U.S.A...U.S.A.]], with other major [[pirates\|constituents]] in the Caribbean. This article will focus mainly on American baseball since [[Japs\|waps]] do very few things well and their sport is just too [[boring]] (not enough McGwire's and Barroids, [[amirite]]?).		There's baseball all around the world, but it's most popular in [[Japan]] and the [[United States\|U.S.A...U.S.A.]], with other major [[pirates\|constituents]] in the Caribbean. This article will focus mainly on American baseball since [[Japs\|waps]] do very few things well and their sport is just too [[boring]] (not enough McGwire's and Barroids, [[amirite]]?).

← Older revision		Revision as of 18:04, 2 February 2014
Line 2:		Line 2:
	[[File:ThrowBat.gif\|right\|frame\|This gets you bonus points in baseball.]]		[[File:ThrowBat.gif\|right\|frame\|This gets you bonus points in baseball.]]

	Regarded as the cure for insomnia, '''baseball''' is a sport [[at least 100]] years old ~~and~~ involves fun things to do with bats and balls. You can swing a [[dildo\|bat]]. You can hit a ball. You can catch a ball. You can throw a ball. You can watch people catch, throw, and hit balls. It is an incredibly exciting game, lasting for on average three hours of your life that will never come back. The game would actually go faster if the players didn't provide extra talent at no cost, such as [[STD\|scratching themselves]], juicing up, and spitting a load of [[shit]] on the field. And the teams do this over 150 times each year, just in case the first ten games were wayyy too exciting for the common viewer.		Regarded as the cure for insomnia, '''baseball''' is a sport [[at least 100]] years old that involves fun things to do with bats and balls. You can swing a [[dildo\|bat]]. You can hit a ball. You can catch a ball. You can throw a ball. You can watch people catch, throw, and hit balls. It is an incredibly exciting game, lasting for on average three hours of your life that will never come back. The game would actually go faster if the players didn't provide extra talent at no cost, such as [[STD\|scratching themselves]], juicing up, and spitting a load of [[shit]] on the field. And the teams do this over 150 times each year, just in case the first ten games were wayyy too exciting for the common viewer.

	There's baseball all around the world, but it's most popular in [[Japan]] and the [[United States\|U.S.A...U.S.A.]], with other major [[pirates\|constituents]] in the Caribbean ~~love~~. This article will focus mainly on American baseball since [[Japs\|waps]] do very ~~little~~ things well and their sport is just too [[boring]] (not enough McGwire's and Barroids, [[amirite]]?).		There's baseball all around the world, but it's most popular in [[Japan]] and the [[United States\|U.S.A...U.S.A.]], with other major [[pirates\|constituents]] in the Caribbean. This article will focus mainly on American baseball since [[Japs\|waps]] do very few things well and their sport is just too [[boring]] (not enough McGwire's and Barroids, [[amirite]]?).

	== Early Years ==		== Early Years ==
	~~Baseball has its~~ origins ~~dating~~ way back to ancient Egypt, but who cares about what they did. Officially, it was invented by Abner Doubleday, and the first professional ball club formed [[last Thursday\|twenty years later in 1869]], called the Cincinnati [[Commies\|Reds]]. For a while, there was nothing. Some teams would come and go, players would hit balls and kill other players, fans would sit in coliseums and watch the players as they battled lions, tigers, cubs, pirates, [[native American\|Indians]], slews of birds, beaneaters, and various trolls dressed in different colored socks. All of this was for the [[Hitler\|president]], who would sit in the stands and determine which players fight which. When a player was subdued, the loser "struck out" after a baseball bat to the noggin. Much disorder was witnessed, and many brave ballplayers sacrificed their very beings battling epically in these death matches that would make a ''Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles'' episode look more pathetic than what it actually is.		Baseballs origins go way back to ancient Egypt, but who cares about what they did. Officially, it was invented by Abner Doubleday, and the first professional ball club formed [[last Thursday\|twenty years later in 1869]], called the Cincinnati [[Commies\|Reds]]. For a while, there was nothing. Some teams would come and go, players would hit balls and kill other players, fans would sit in coliseums and watch the players as they battled lions, tigers, cubs, pirates, [[native American\|Indians]], slews of birds, beaneaters, and various trolls dressed in different colored socks. All of this was for the [[Hitler\|president]], who would sit in the stands and determine which players fight which. When a player was subdued, the loser "struck out" after a baseball bat to the noggin. Much disorder was witnessed, and many brave [[faggots\|ballplayers]] sacrificed their very beings battling epically in these death matches that would make a ''Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles'' episode look more pathetic than what it actually is.

	The chaos ended in 1901, when the American League formed alongside the National League. Some teams were destroyed, some where kept, others were [[God\|created]]. One such created team was in Pittsburgh, where they literally stole a few key players from other teams and named themselves the Pirates (srsly, [[Do it faggot\|look it up]]). They happened to win baseball's first championship. They were also in the first World Series played two years later when [[Boston\|Bahhhstin]] beat them 5-3 (and without relying on a senator too!).		The chaos ended in 1901, when the American League formed alongside the National League. Some teams were destroyed, some where kept, others were [[God\|created]]. One such created team was in Pittsburgh, where they literally stole a few key players from other teams and named themselves the Pirates (srsly, [[Do it faggot\|look it up]]). They happened to win baseball's first championship. They were also in the first World Series played two years later when [[Boston\|Bahhhstin]] beat them 5-3 (and without relying on a senator too!).
Line 51:		Line 51:

	[[Image:Ha-ha-barroid.jpg\|thumb\|250px\|No caption needed.]]		[[Image:Ha-ha-barroid.jpg\|thumb\|250px\|No caption needed.]]
	Nope, no roids there. As a matter of fact, baseball did an "investigation" lead by congress, specifically a US Senator named George Mitchell, who also owned the [[trolls\|Red Sox]]. A few years passed, and allegations ~~flied~~ back and forth. Towards the end of the 2007 season, when his beloved Red Sox were on the verge of losing a game seven to the Cleveland Indians, Mitchell in ever-classy way released that the Indians' Starter Paul Byrd had been "illegally" taking HGH. About twenty-four hours later, when the Red Sox [[Hax\|won]], it was proven Byrd did in fact have permission by MLB to take the drugs. Mitchell then went on to say Matt Holiday, star Left Fielder of the World Series team Colorado Rockies also took HGH, but this was dropped because Mitchell didn't want to look too much like an [[ass]].		Nope, no roids there. As a matter of fact, baseball did an "investigation" lead by congress, specifically a US Senator named George Mitchell, who also owned the [[trolls\|Red Sox]]. A few years passed, and allegations flew back and forth. Towards the end of the 2007 season, when his beloved Red Sox were on the verge of losing a game seven to the Cleveland Indians, Mitchell in his ever-classy way released that the Indians' Starter Paul Byrd had been "illegally" taking HGH. About twenty-four hours later, when the Red Sox [[Hax\|won]], it was proven Byrd did in fact have permission by MLB to take the drugs. Mitchell then went on to say Matt Holiday, star Left Fielder of the World Series team Colorado Rockies also took HGH, but this was dropped because Mitchell didn't want to look too much like an [[ass]].

	The roid investigation was released in December 2007 as the Mitchell Report (cause Mitchell did everything in it, MMKAY?). The report, which was basically one huge [[TL;DR]], named stars [[lie\|everyone knows about]] such as FP Santangelo, Randy Velarde, and Marvin Bernard. And the Red Sox were basically the only team not to have a current player listed in the report. It seems as though players like David Ortiz just woke up one day and had muscles...[[ATHF\|must be something in the water]]. Roger Clemens was also named in the report, as was Jason Giambi, but in Clemen's report, so the papers read, [[retarded\|he took roids when he pitched in Toronto, went off them when he moved back to Boston, then went on them again when he signed to New York]]. But so far, there's been no retribution for this [[faggotry]].		The roid investigation was released in December 2007 as the Mitchell Report (cause Mitchell did everything in it, MMKAY?). The report, which was basically one huge [[TL;DR]], named stars [[lie\|everyone knows about]] such as FP Santangelo, Randy Velarde, and Marvin Bernard. And the Red Sox were basically the only team not to have a current player listed in the report. It seems as though players like David Ortiz just woke up one day and had muscles...[[ATHF\|must be something in the water]]. Roger Clemens was also named in the report, as was Jason Giambi, but in Clemen's report, so the papers read, [[retarded\|he took roids when he pitched in Toronto, went off them when he moved back to Boston, then went on them again when he signed to New York]]. But so far, there's been no retribution for this [[faggotry]].