Allah - Revision history

Pinoywaffen: /* History */

2024-08-08T11:20:25Z

History

← Older revision		Revision as of 11:20, 8 August 2024
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	==History==		==History==
	[[Way before the internets]], Muhammad, a [[Arab\|towelhead]] living in the city of Makkah in what is now [[Saudi Arabia]], began to receive [[AIM\|IM]]s from Allah, who was using the screenname "Jibril." The messages were mostly [[pedophilia\|requests to cyber and a/s/l]], but Mohammad saw the potential for [[epic]] [[trolling]] and [[lulz]], so he compiled them into a gigantic [[Microsoft]] word document called qur'an.doc. Muhammad distributed it to his [[Myspace]] top 10(including [[Tom Anderson\|Tom]]) who posted it to a bulletin, causing innumerable [[Flamewar\|flame wars]]. Eventually, Jihad was declared upon [[Jesus\|Mr.Jesus]]. The purpose of which was to spread the word of [[Senator Barack Hussein Obama\|Allah]] by any means necessary to the rest of the world.		[[Way before the internets]], Muhammad, a [[Arab\|towelhead]] living in the city of Makkah in what is now [[Saudi Arabia]], began to receive [[AIM\|IM]]s from Allah, who was using the screenname "Jibril." The messages were mostly [[pedophilia\|requests to cyber and a/s/l]], but Mohammad aka the founder kebab saw the potential for [[epic]] [[trolling]] and [[lulz]], so he compiled them into a gigantic [[Microsoft]] word document called qur'an.doc. Muhammad distributed it to his [[Myspace]] top 10(including [[Tom Anderson\|Tom]]) who posted it to a bulletin, causing innumerable [[Flamewar\|flame wars]]. Eventually, Jihad was declared upon [[Jesus\|Mr.Jesus]]. The purpose of which was to spread the word of [[Senator Barack Hussein Obama\|Allah]] by any means necessary to the rest of the world.

	==Interesting Facts==		==Interesting Facts==

Gerda Arendt: /* Interesting Facts */ Most male suicide bombers get 72 virgins BUT THEY ARE ALL MALE VIRGINS.

2024-06-30T10:13:57Z

Interesting Facts: Most male suicide bombers get 72 virgins BUT THEY ARE ALL MALE VIRGINS.

← Older revision		Revision as of 10:13, 30 June 2024
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	==Interesting Facts==		==Interesting Facts==
	* Allah is the central focus of terrorism.		* Allah is the central focus of terrorism.
	* Allah promises 72 virgins (most likely [[Trap\|traps]]) if you become [[an hero]] for him (Read the Qu'ran for handy bomb making tips, and ways to becoming [[an hero]]).		* Allah promises 72 virgins (most likely [[Trap\|traps]]) if you become [[an hero]] for him (Read the Qu'ran for handy bomb making tips, and ways to becoming [[an hero]]). Most male suicide bombers get 72 virgins BUT THEY ARE ALL MALE VIRGINS.
	* Allah planned [[9/11]], and then blamed a mentally retarded Jew named [[Osama Bin Laden]] who couldn't tell a bomb from his own left testicle.		* Allah planned [[9/11]], and then blamed a mentally retarded American Jew named [[Osama Bin Laden]] who couldn't tell a bomb from his own left testicle.
	* Although forbids the depiction of [[Mohammad]] in art, he is commonly depicted in much of the Danish press as an elderly man with a beard, towels wrapped around his head, [[Terrorism\|and a bomb jacket strapped to him.]]		* Although forbids the depiction of [[Mohammad]] in art, he is commonly depicted in much of the Danish press as an elderly man with a beard, towels wrapped around his head, [[Terrorism\|and a bomb jacket strapped to him.]]
	* In a dream, [[Mohammad]] was told by Allah to inform the people that in his honor they shall serve Allah-Carte in all cafeterias in the holy land.		* In a dream, [[Mohammad]] was told by Allah to inform the people that in his honor they shall serve Allah-Carte in all cafeterias in the holy land.
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	*Allah works in a black cubicle in Mecca, except for Friday, on Friday he answers prayers and customer complanits.		*Allah works in a black cubicle in Mecca, except for Friday, on Friday he answers prayers and customer complanits.
	*Allah is a cousin of Nurgle, and the Brother of Horus.		*Allah is a cousin of Nurgle, and the Brother of Horus.

	==Friends of Allah==		==Friends of Allah==
	[[Image:Allahburgerking.jpg\|thumb\|right\|The name of Allah appears [[It is a mystery\|mysteriously]] on a Burger King label in [[England]].]]		[[Image:Allahburgerking.jpg\|thumb\|right\|The name of Allah appears [[It is a mystery\|mysteriously]] on a Burger King label in [[England]].]]

imported>MarioMario456 at 05:51, 15 August 2021

2021-08-15T05:51:36Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 05:51, 15 August 2021
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			{{OffendedMuslims}}
	[[Image:Allah Ackbar.jpg\|150px\|thumb\|right\|God, as worshiped by the Muslims. The slogan "Allah Ackbar" translates literally from the Arabic as "Allah is [[Admiral Ackbar\|(Admiral) Ackbar]]."]]		[[Image:Allah Ackbar.jpg\|150px\|thumb\|right\|God, as worshiped by the Muslims. The slogan "Allah Ackbar" translates literally from the Arabic as "Allah is [[Admiral Ackbar\|(Admiral) Ackbar]]."]]
	'''Allah''' is the sand-language word for ''God'', and almost universally refers to the '''God of Raep and Terrorism worshipped in Islam'''. Technically speaking, there is no difference in saying "God" and "Allah", and some Arab Christian use the word to describe [[God\|Normal God]]. In reality however, Allah is very different from God, as God is generally displeased by [[terrorism]]. Allah's "[[religion]]" is properly referred to as I Slam Beer or simply '[[Islam]]' (Arabic for submission/[[rape]]). Its adherents are called "[[Muslims]]" (or ''sand [[heroes]]''). The central tenet of Islam is that there are no other gods (e.g., [[Jesus]], [[Raptor Jesus]], [[Flying Spaghetti Monster]], [[Cthulhu]], [[Mudkips]], [[Etc\|Etc.]]) except for Allah and that [["Prophet" Muhammad\|Muhammad]] was his [[profit\|prophet]]. Allah inspires his [[fanboys]] around the world to become [[an_hero\|heroes]] in his holy name, but only if it involves killing a shitload of other people in the process. Fewer [[fandom\|fictional characters]] have more [[fundamentalist\|devoted]] followers than Allah. When Muslims mention Allah, they must say ''Subhanahu wa taʿala'' - abbreviated as ''SAW'' - each time (the phrase means "May he be praised and exalted"). The punishment for failing to do this is [[death]].		'''Allah''' is the sand-language word for ''God'', and almost universally refers to the '''God of Raep and Terrorism worshipped in Islam'''. Technically speaking, there is no difference in saying "God" and "Allah", and some Arab Christian use the word to describe [[God\|Normal God]]. In reality however, Allah is very different from God, as God is generally displeased by [[terrorism]]. Allah's "[[religion]]" is properly referred to as I Slam Beer or simply '[[Islam]]' (Arabic for submission/[[rape]]). Its adherents are called "[[Muslims]]" (or ''sand [[heroes]]''). The central tenet of Islam is that there are no other gods (e.g., [[Jesus]], [[Raptor Jesus]], [[Flying Spaghetti Monster]], [[Cthulhu]], [[Mudkips]], [[Etc\|Etc.]]) except for Allah and that [["Prophet" Muhammad\|Muhammad]] was his [[profit\|prophet]]. Allah inspires his [[fanboys]] around the world to become [[an_hero\|heroes]] in his holy name, but only if it involves killing a shitload of other people in the process. Fewer [[fandom\|fictional characters]] have more [[fundamentalist\|devoted]] followers than Allah. When Muslims mention Allah, they must say ''Subhanahu wa taʿala'' - abbreviated as ''SAW'' - each time (the phrase means "May he be praised and exalted"). The punishment for failing to do this is [[death]].

imported>Suleiko: Cleaned up crappy attempted semicolon use, fixed bad grammar and added a few lines with some info.

2019-02-06T22:27:32Z

Cleaned up crappy attempted semicolon use, fixed bad grammar and added a few lines with some info.

← Older revision		Revision as of 22:27, 6 February 2019
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	[[Image:Allah Ackbar.jpg\|150px\|thumb\|right\|God, as worshiped by the Muslims. The slogan "Allah Ackbar" translates literally from the Arabic as "Allah is [[Admiral Ackbar\|(Admiral) Ackbar]]."]]		[[Image:Allah Ackbar.jpg\|150px\|thumb\|right\|God, as worshiped by the Muslims. The slogan "Allah Ackbar" translates literally from the Arabic as "Allah is [[Admiral Ackbar\|(Admiral) Ackbar]]."]]
	[[God]], ~~from Arabic transliteration~~. ~~So actually~~ there's no difference in saying "God" and "Allah", ~~yet diseased mountain goats like Albanians still prefer~~ the ~~arabic version~~. Allah's [[religion]] is properly referred to as I Slam Beer or simply '[[Islam]]' (Arabic for submission/[[rape]]~~; its~~ adherents are called "[[Muslims]]", or sand [[heroes]]. The central tenet of Islam is that there are no other gods (e.g., [[Jesus]], [[Raptor Jesus]], [[Flying Spaghetti Monster]], [[Cthulhu]], [[Mudkips]], [[Etc\|Etc.]]) except for Allah and that ~~Mohammad~~ was his [[profit\|prophet]]. Allah inspires his [[fanboys]] around the world to become [[an_hero\|heroes]] in his holy name. Fewer [[~~fandoms~~]] have more [[fundamentalist\|devoted]] followers. See [[Islam]]		'''Allah''' is the sand-language word for ''God'', and almost universally refers to the '''God of Raep and Terrorism worshipped in Islam'''. Technically speaking, there is no difference in saying "God" and "Allah", and some Arab Christian use the word to describe [[God\|Normal God]]. In reality however, Allah is very different from God, as God is generally displeased by [[terrorism]]. Allah's "[[religion]]" is properly referred to as I Slam Beer or simply '[[Islam]]' (Arabic for submission/[[rape]]). Its adherents are called "[[Muslims]]" (or ''sand [[heroes]]''). The central tenet of Islam is that there are no other gods (e.g., [[Jesus]], [[Raptor Jesus]], [[Flying Spaghetti Monster]], [[Cthulhu]], [[Mudkips]], [[Etc\|Etc.]]) except for Allah and that [["Prophet" Muhammad\|Muhammad]] was his [[profit\|prophet]]. Allah inspires his [[fanboys]] around the world to become [[an_hero\|heroes]] in his holy name, but only if it involves killing a shitload of other people in the process. Fewer [[fandom\|fictional characters]] have more [[fundamentalist\|devoted]] followers than Allah. When Muslims mention Allah, they must say ''Subhanahu wa taʿala'' - abbreviated as ''SAW'' - each time (the phrase means "May he be praised and exalted"). The punishment for failing to do this is [[death]].
			<br>
			(See [[Islam]] for more)



	==History==		==History==
	[[Way before the internets]], ~~Mohammad~~, a [[Arab\|towelhead]] living in the city of Makkah in what is now [[Saudi Arabia]], began to receive [[AIM\|IM]]s from Allah, who was using the screenname "Jibril." The messages were mostly [[pedophilia\|requests to cyber and a/s/l]], but Mohammad saw the potential for [[epic]] [[trolling]] and [[lulz]], so he compiled them into a gigantic [[Microsoft]] word document called qur'an.doc. Muhammad distributed it to his [[Myspace]] top 10(including [[Tom Anderson\|Tom]]) who posted it to a bulletin, causing innumerable [[Flamewar\|flame wars]]. Eventually, Jihad was declared upon [[Jesus\|Mr.Jesus]]. The purpose of which was to spread the word of [[Senator Barack Hussein Obama\|Allah]] by any means necessary to the rest of the world.		[[Way before the internets]], Muhammad, a [[Arab\|towelhead]] living in the city of Makkah in what is now [[Saudi Arabia]], began to receive [[AIM\|IM]]s from Allah, who was using the screenname "Jibril." The messages were mostly [[pedophilia\|requests to cyber and a/s/l]], but Mohammad saw the potential for [[epic]] [[trolling]] and [[lulz]], so he compiled them into a gigantic [[Microsoft]] word document called qur'an.doc. Muhammad distributed it to his [[Myspace]] top 10(including [[Tom Anderson\|Tom]]) who posted it to a bulletin, causing innumerable [[Flamewar\|flame wars]]. Eventually, Jihad was declared upon [[Jesus\|Mr.Jesus]]. The purpose of which was to spread the word of [[Senator Barack Hussein Obama\|Allah]] by any means necessary to the rest of the world.

	==Interesting Facts==		==Interesting Facts==

imported>Memememememe: /* Things Done in the Name of Allah */

2017-10-30T11:44:32Z