Encyclopedia Dramatica - Things to revert [en]

Talk:Intellectual Checkmate

2026-03-22T04:54:36Z

Lazarus:

The OhInternet [[youtube]] video says nothing about goronchev in anyway. Seems pointless to be on there [[User:Lazarus|Lazarus]]

Benos sent me this email of goronchev(who sent this to his dad) trying to get benos off the internet, obviously, benos didn't [[an_hero]].
L.a. Bomb6:33am Jun 14th

Beware [[TL;DR]] and pretend [[moralfag|moralfagging]]

''''''Goronchev's butthurt cry for help''''''

'''I've known of your son Ben for a good while via his Internet activities, and I'm quite concerned for him. I didn't know what else to do to get him help besides going to you. I figured you didn't know the things I'm about to reveal about Ben, and I felt it was my moral obligation to tell you those things about him. Circumstances regarding his online activities have reached a boiling point, laws have been broken, and I fear for your son's well-being-- both mentally and physically.

'''There is no easy way I can put this... Ben has been harassing YouTube users since at least as far back as 2008. He fixates on certain users obsessively, he has mocked them, he has threatened them, and he has tried to get their phone numbers and addresses to try to take things to the next level-- offline with threats of phone harassment, and threats of in-person harassment.'''

'''As a result of his behavior, certain people decided to strike back at him and track him down-- which was successful. While I don't know all the details of what happened, Ben's identity, location of residence, and places where he physically goes have been identified by many people online who seem to want to see him get hurt in real life. Things have gone too far already, and I wanted to do my part to warn you and try my best to help this situation-- before it's too late.'''

'''While I'm worried about your son's physical safety, I'm also worried about his mental state. Recently, Ben exposed himself on his webcam and uploaded it to YouTube. He also has repeatedly fixated on certain teenage users, as one can see on some of his Internet pages I link to later in this email.'''

'''I suspect you are a good man Keith. What you did in support of Allen Rea indicated that to me. I suspect you might be able to fix this situation with your son Ben. Personally, I suggest you have stern talks with Ben and remove his Internet access for a long time-- both to let the situation cool down for Ben's safety and mental state, and to teach Ben a lesson so he doesn't continue down the same road. Also, an apology video from Ben might go a long way towards eradicating the animosity many people have towards him. If you have love for your son and have his best interests in mind, it is crucial that you remove his Internet access.'''

'''For the sake of you getting relevant information on this situation, I will provide the url to all of Ben's web-pages I'm aware of where he has attacked people:'''

http://www.facebook.com/l/9ed597E7417r4WkkTN1wgIQP_iQ/www.youtube.com/benos (here's his main Internet content creation place where he makes videos attacking people. You'll recognize your son on video here, but you may not recognize his behavior.)

http://www.facebook.com/l/9ed59omfP9l4Zm2FuwjO9LkwM_g/twitter.com/%23!/goronchevisafag (here Ben attacks people via text exclusively.)

http://www.facebook.com/l/9ed59PVF3FA6awmdUMcY8GDuPFQ/benosblogofthings.blogspot.com/ (here Ben attacks various YouTube users via blog.)

http://www.facebook.com/l/9ed59ABWAIs-uJme0o0ARwGvftw/www.youtube.com/mastrobatorify (this was the account where he recently exposed himself on webcam; he has since removed that video, but someone downloaded it and saved it. He also attacks users on this channel, and pretends it's not him operating the channel-- but it was already proven Ben made the videos on the channel and operates it.)

http://www.facebook.com/l/9ed59GWn7vB6SX94Hk_Uin9IzOw/www.youtube.com/TrollTroller77 (Ben also attacks people on this channel, and pretends to be someone else. It was shown to be Ben operating the channel.)

http://www.facebook.com/l/9ed59_R5AysjyiTQr6hGrdTDaWg/www.facepunch.com/members/178502-benos (this seems to be his favorite forum.)

'''I'm sorry I had to bring bad news to you, but I felt it was the ethical thing to do in order to prevent even worse things from occurring.Thank you for your time Keith. You and Ben are in my thoughts, and I hope things work out for the best in the end.'''
And that's pretty much it. Benos lives to tell the tale from the gayest blogger alive.'''

Though he can't prove shit, and he did was advertise anything that ben did on the internet.

I know this wouldn't worthy for the main page because it's [[tl;dr]] but, the lesli confession here, benos blogspotted it:

'''http://benosblogofthings.blogspot.com/2011/06/leslis-confession-is-back.html?'''

Goronchev recently edited his message in a previous video about benos a friend in mine in real life, his no.1 stalker.

'''*Update: He apparently recently got this video removed from multiple sites via complaints/flagging/false DMCAs. Apparently I hurt him so bad by revealing the truth about him that he censored my content. Once again he's proven to be a hypocrite because he criticized me for allegedly being anti-free speech because I turned off comments years ago on my videos, and yet he's taken some of my videos down giving my opinion on him and proving things about him. It's also hypocritical that he heavily criticizes Brett Keane for doing things that he (Ben) does.

'''His trying to censor my videos is tantamount to waving the white flag of surrender, and is yet another way in which he pwned himself and made himself look a fool. Intellectual checkmate you lying, welfare receiving, small penis showing man-child with Asperger's syndrome named Ben Alan Kelley who lives at 26 {censored) St. in Rockhampton, Queensland, Australia. You got owned harder than anyone I ever saw get owned online!'''

Goronchev, BUTTHURT much? Hypocritical and liar who never cleared the evidence of proving nothing of his Lesli girlfriend that he thinks is fake or conversations he had with her. User:Benosisdead

AI artwork

2025-10-18T11:09:20Z

Lazarus: /* Various AI Artwork Sites and programs */

[[File:AI cant even draw hands 338.png|250px|right]]
Once upon a time, the field of lazy illustrated ''[[art]]work'' was achieved solely by ''real [[autists|human beans]]'' on material, and by the early 21st century, mostly on [[Tumblr]], [[DeviantART]] and other obscenely caged platforms, all requiring extreme aspie capacity. But this changed in mid-2022, after suitable development of [[Skynet]] sentience came about by the means of [[Artificial Intelligence]] and it's machine learning, with programs such as [https://openai.com/dall-e DALL-E], [https://stability.ai/ Stable Diffusion], and various others going viral online for being able to generate on demand shitty distorted "artwork", all with a couple of presses on a keyboard.

This is a [[problem, officer?|problematic]] challenge for "career artists", and the entire scene of artwork creation is currently (and [[LOLWUT|maybe]] rightfully so) shitting their pants. With that said, and being the [[Where is your X now?|unparalleled pinnacle of truths that is Encyclopedia Dramatica]], the following should be noted before proceeding: [[Truth|'''art does not exist''']].

==The Future is Now!==
What was unimaginable just [[Last Thursday|10 years ago]] is now a saucy and existential reality – artificial intelligence is creating "art" and a number of them don't suck complete ass. Naturally this fact has had several [[lulzy]] effects which will only continue to transcend as our robot overlords continue to evolve and improve, and remove all unwanted labor from humanity.

The most obvious one was the [[shitting bricks|brick-shitting]] done by artists once they realized that major corps AND ordinary users had the means at their disposal to dispose of them. This was especially traumatic for pr0n artists who could make quite a nice living by catering to degenerate coomers thirsty for that sweet sweet porn, but not anymore! Now every [[retard]] will be able to punch a few buttons on their keyboard and get all the smut they ever wanted with endless varieties = endless cum = ?? = endless profit. "[[pussy|Clean]]" artists are not much better off either as all those corporations/jews who used to pay for them decorating their ads/homes/objects can now just use an AI to whip something up in a few minutes knowing that the public will eat it up regardless of where it came from.

Furthermore, there are now projects underway to make AI that can write and compose music. with "animation AI" also being slated for the near future, so if you are an artist, YOU ARE FUCKED! (Unless you are a big music corp in which case even the fucking AI will back off from your army of lawyers and small corporate assassins, good for you.) To add insult to injury, the said AIs' are being fed tens of thousands of images crawled from various places online, chances are that if you're an artist who posts online your own artwork was or will be used to train your replacement, ain't that a doozy?

Another effect which is even more lulzworthy due to the nature of AI likely causing such a glut of art and content that it may fuck over our digital civilization for decades, and here's how! Imagine if you one day decided to get off of your [[fat]] ass and tried to draw something, or compose a piece of music, or write as shittyless fanfic as you aspergerd brain could allow you to. Well too bad since unless you made it for your own sake or to share with your family and IRL friends (this is a theoretical scenario so you can at least pretend that you do), you will find that hardly anyone can even see it since every social media site or online art gallery like [[DeviantArt]] or [[Furaffinity]] are now drowned with content that is only increasing by the second.

Seeing this loltastic development, certain parties have taken steps to try and stem the tide of digital pee-AI-siss that are readying to ram themselves into their proverbial asses. The aforementioned sites and others included instituted a ban on any AI artwork with acid baths and castration for [[1337|machine-lovers]] who bird copyrights. Others have been bellowing for tighter control of what and where the AIs take as "inspiration" but since that's going against big corps and from a bunch of mere artists, don't expect that to have much effect.

Lastly, a particular strain of retard has emerged called "AI whisperer" who think that they will be able to make a living via telling present and future AIs what to draw using specialized strings of words (prompts), but what they don't realize is that either someone will find a good string on their own, or they will train the AIs to produce artwork well enough to only require little or no input beyond pushing a button.

So in cumclusion, if you are a coomer, rejoice all the porn you ever wanted, at the cost of the entire human creative endeavor, and if you are an artist, there's really only one thing you can do now: [[Dune|Butlerian]][[Jihad]]! Run before they can create humanity.

AI has also proved to be a nearly unlimited source of [[lulz]] as it mere mention causes all [[artists]] to rage uncontrollably and start crying about how they cant get commissions.

==Various AI Artwork Sites and programs==
*'''[https://www.midjourney.com/home Midjourney]''' - an AI algorithm that is able to create bad art from text-description prompts.
*'''[https://stability.ai/ Stable Diffusion]''' - created by the team at '''Stability AI''', and it can do the same thing as Midjourney but also can use base images as prompts. ''Mostly just used for [[anime]] rule 34. And weird ass art of celebrities that many want to fap over or kill themselves''
*'''[https://openai.com/index/dall-e/ DALL-E]''' '''[https://openai.com/index/dall-e-2/ 2]''' - another text-to-generation AI model that is often used. DALL-E is created by the nerds on the '''OpenAI''' team.
*'''[https://www.craiyon.com/ Craiyon]''' (formerly '''DALL-E Mini''') - another text-to-image algorithm. Out of all the sites listed here, this is probably the most well-known; most likely because it doesn't require an account, and the pictures it generated are [[Cursed Images|cursed]] as hell.
*'''[https://novelai.net/ NovelAI Diffusion]''' - Some [[greedy]] generator, also used for animu shit. [https://blog.novelai.net/image-generation-announcement-807b3cf0afec See more]
*'''[https://pornpen.ai/ PornPen]''' - AI image generator for [[Forever alone|coomers]].
*'''[https://www.deviantart.com/dreamup DreamUp]''' - [[DeviantArt|DeviantShart]]'s [https://www.deviantart.com/team/journal/Create-AI-Generated-Art-Fairly-with-DreamUp-933537821 own AI image generator since November 2022]. unsurprisingly, this only screwing up the site even more, and even majority of the tarlets hate it, mainly because the [[fact]] that AI "artwork" isn't art, and it can lead to more [[Art theft]] that is rampant on the site.
*'''[https://www.mage.space/ Mage Space]''' - Free but, also optionally a average paywall site that won't draw you porn anymore. Except maybe only nudity.
*'''[https://thisxdoesnotexist.com/ This X Does Not Exist]''' - series, in particular '''[https://thisanimedoesnotexist.ai/ This Anime Doesn't Exist]''' and '''[https://www.thiswaifudoesnotexist.net/ This Waifu Doesn't Exist]'''.
*'''[https://openart.ai/create Openart]'''.
*'''[https://stablediffusion.fr/ Stable Diffusion AI online]''' - Generate them like the french girls until they ban your account for porn flooding it.
*<s>'''[https://waifus.nemusona.com/ Nemu's Waifu Generator]''' - OMG Make your disturbed anime gurls you sick fucks.</s> '''Dead'''.
*'''[https://yodayo.com/text-to-image/ Yodayo]''' - Animu waifu maker.
*<s>'''[https://deepfloyd-if.hf.space/ DeepFloyd IF]'''</s> '''space is paused'''
*<s>'''[https://pornx.ai/ Pornx AI]''' - Limited generation shit for free that no one cares about, has a paywall, but good to use undress more often if you want to make a girl naked that you can't talk to IRL.</s> '''Dead.'''
*'''[https://www.promeai.pro/ PromeAI]''' - The funny thing about the site, when you try to inpainting for porn, it draws more [[BBC]] can think about, the [[jew|owner]] must be a massive [[cuck]] and [[troll]].
*'''[https://civitai.com/ CivitAI]''' - All the model shit, you'll properly download alot furry stuff, you sick fuck.
*'''[https://perchance.org/ai-character-generator Perchance picture generator]''' - sometimes nsfw
*'''[https://grok.com/imagine/ Grok Imagine]''' [[Elon_Musk]]'s New AI which is just another gooning for celeb gens which now made more censored after it is just another station for lewding.

{{clear}}

==The three types of AI art==
<center>[[File:The three types of AI Art 721.jpeg|500px]]</center>

==AI-created [[Rule 34]]==
It goes without saying that if you give the interwebs' <strike>netizens</strike> DENIZENS any kind of web-generator app, that it eventually will be used maliciously, in this case it didn't take long for the web to start abusing the programs to create [[Rule 34|Eros-type art]]. '''{{KYM|memes/cultures/hentai-diffusion|Even MOAR info is available on KYM *Gasp*}}'''.
{{cg|Gallery|gallery1|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:AI model - Waifu Diffusion - artist - AIPicMaker - AI Art Semi-lewd.jpg
File:Original using novelai - df05711003412a5d8e38b6b492a9eeee.png|Original character, we guess? - Software used: NovelAI
File:Diffusionwaifuhentai masked class AI Artwork sample-58a179acfe0d8b2bd73895715ffb48fa.jpg
File:D.va (overwatch) using novelai - d9bfb1d0fae1eeb58e9e31657711fe73.png|[[Overwatch]] AI-generated [[Rule 34]] 1 - Software used: NovelAI
File:D.va (overwatch) using novelai - 39bffd082aa62fdbb28350fa1ba938cd.png|[[Overwatch]] AI-generated [[Rule 34]] 2 - Software used: NovelAI
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:AIASS.jpg
File:Hatsune miku (vocaloid) - 0f657fb42b14e1b80558a6271107fb94.jpg
File:May (pokemon and 1 more) using novelai - b6dd91979e5d43162011f2806473be7f.png|[[Pokemon|Gotta 'fuck em all!]] - Software used: NovelAI
File:Hatsune miku (vocaloid) generated by berryneko using novelai - ee377aabccc24cf7ec5b2f0c6c38277b.png|Hatsune Miku as a slime-girl - Software used: NovelAI
File:Original generated by robotliar using waifu diffusion - AI hent.png|'nother "[[Original character|original character]]" - Software used: Waifu Diffusion
</gallery>}}

==Galleries of Borg art==

===DALL-E/DALL-E Mini "art"===
{{cg|Gallery|gallery2|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Dalle Mini - Uncle Sam eating infants.png
File:Dalle Mini - Byzantine Mosaic Shrek.JPG
File:Dalle Mini - Tubgirl.JPG
File:Dalle Mini 2girls1cup.JPG
File:Big Bird being Crucified - AI artwork.JPG
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Dalle Mini - The beginning.png
File:Dalle Mini - The end.png
</gallery>}}

===Stable Diffusion "art"===
{{cg|Gallery|gallery3|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Stable Diffusion - nature 83e.jpg
File:Stable Diffusion - Daily Dose of Old Video Games 315.png|[[Piccolo Dick]]
File:Stable diffusion AI Artwork - daily dose of nature.png
File:Stable diffusion September Cake - AI artwork 7f5.png
File:Stable Diffusion - Elon Musk in GTA 6f6.png
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Stable Diffusion - In the Airplane Over the Sea - 649.png
File:Stable Diffusion Realistic lofi girl f8c.jpg
File:Stable Diffusion - Nowareno.png
File:Hoshizora rin (love live!) generated by dual1020 using stable diffusion.png
File:Stable Diffusion - Pepe Stable Diffusion Painting 78b.png
File:Stable Diffusion - Happy Cat 289.jpg
</gallery>}}

===Tencent QQ AI "art"===
<center><gallery>
File:Kiwi Farms QQ tencent AI Anime Artwork Chris Chandler 1.jpeg
File:Kiwi Farms QQ tencent AI Anime Artwork black white old city.jpeg
</gallery></center>

===Other Assorted AI-generated "artwork" and related images===
{{cg|Gallery|gallery4|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Pumpkin party.png
File:Original generated by faia92 - e2e177c59bcd975246a8b300d75c39af.png
File:AI Art - 'Loss' meme POV edition 579.jpg
File:AI art - AI art will never be able to render dog girls smoking cigarettes with the care that a moody unemployed 25 year old can 739.png
File:Negative prompts vs stable diffusion 037.png
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:AI art bad at drawing hands - as teacher so student cd9.jpg
File:AI Art - AI art is an amazing advancement 7af.jpg
File:Mona Lisa AI Boobs.png
</gallery>}}

==External Links==
*'''{{KYM|memes/cultures/ai-art|AI Art on KnowYourMeme}}'''
*[https://www.vice.com/en/article/stable-diffusion-stability-ai-nsfw-ai-generated-porn/ This AI Tool Is Being Used to Make Freaky, Machine-Generated Porn - VICE magazine online] {{archive|kem2m}}
*[https://aibooru.online/ AI-Booru]
*[https://harishgarg.com/writing/do-not-use-these-banned-words-in-dall-e-prompts/ Incomplete list of banned DALL-E words/prompts] {{archive|80c4H}}
*[https://www.lesswrong.com/posts/uKp6tBFStnsvrot5t/what-dall-e-2-can-and-cannot-do What DALL-E 2 can and cannot do - LessWrong.com] {{wayback|https://www.lesswrong.com/posts/uKp6tBFStnsvrot5t/what-dall-e-2-can-and-cannot-do|20221112102034|title=(Archived)}}
{{softwarez}}
{{memes}}
[[Category:2022]]
[[Category:Memes]]
[[Category:Web 3.0]]
[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]]
{{Timeline|Featured Article for November 22 and 23, 2022|[[Neopronouns]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Anderson Lee Aldrich]]}}

Dexter

2025-05-30T03:56:07Z

Lazarus: /* Season 10 "Resurrections" */ in progress

{{spoiler|Before Dexter is killed by his own son, his brother is the ice truck killer and Dexter [[pwns]] him. Doakes (bay harbour butcher) and Rita (killed by trinity killer) and Debra and Vogal (killed by brain surgeon) and Lay "best blows" Guerta all fucking die an excruciatingly painful death.
'''Deb finds her urges to [[incest|fuck Dex]] and instead finds out Dex's urges to [[sociopath|kill people]]. Deb kills LaGuerta to save Dex's truth and gets PTSD! Happy New Year! He fakes his death because his [[over 9000|9001th]] girlfriend (Hannah McGay) and son are apparently bound to die because of him.. – becoming a [[shit no one cares about|lumberjack]]. How [[house|original]]. 10 years later his son finds him after mother Hannah dies of cancer for some reason, Dexter then finds his son somehow also has killing urges, and then Dexter gets caught. THE END!!1112'''}}
[[File:Sorry wrong person Dexter.jpg|right|300px]]
[[Image:Dex lab.jpg|thumb|No, not that Dexter]]

'''''Dexter''''' is a TV series (based from book) about a moral [[serial-killer]]/[[sick fuck]] in [[Miami]] named ''Dexter Morgan'', or by friends just ''Dex''. By day he's a forensic [[blood]]-[[squirting|spatter]] analyst who works for the [[pigs|cops]] of Florida. But, much like every [[superhero]] he stalks/vets out and catches criminals, except he ends with [[murder|slaughter]]ing them; by [[aspergers syndrome|aspie]] monologue and thrusting deep into their organs with his long hard blade and inner [[black cock|big black passenger]].

[[File:TV series inspirations.png|thumb|Dexter has inspired many]]

His mother got [[pwnt]] into pieces with a chainsaw in front both him and his older brother Brian, left in a literal pool of blood for days. Causing them to be traumatized for life. However, a [[stereotypical]] policeman, Harry, had guilt's [[trolls remorse|sympathy]] because it was his fault Dexter's mom was murdered, so he adopted him, but left Brian because he was already fucked. And eventually to Harry's dismay Dexter was also one sick fuck!! After Harry commits [[suicide]], Dexter is downcast for approximately 9 seconds. because his reject sister is alive and he has a girlfriend that makes him [[sammich]] and has little children to distract him with and has Long story short, he kills criminals [[For the lulz|because he can]].

==Season storylines==
===Season 1===
[[File:Julie_Benz.jpg|thumb|150px|Dexter's hot girlfriend. [[homosexual|Don't like?]]]]

It all starts with Dexter killing people and trying to find this other serial killer is also a pretty cool guy, talks with fellow [[cops]] (who are mostly [[spics]] because it's Miami.) gets accused of beign a [[sick fuck]] by a [[nigger]] cop, monologues and kills random ass criminals for 20 episodes while trying to fight his homosexuality enough to fuck his girlfriend and [[rape|play with]] her kids.
It turns out his brother is actually the other serial killer and offers Dexter to join him and be killers but Dexter says no and [[pwns]] him, which makes no fucking sense.

===Season 2===
[[File:Lilah-west 480x640.jpg|thumb|[[A challenger appears]].]]

Secret's out and lots of dead bodies are found. A [[party van|FBI]] agent is called in and wants to hit Dexter's sister; Dexter wants the same. This makes our hero very jealous. His girlfriend thinks he's chasing the dragon so she sends him to rehab. In rehab he meets a woman who has da hots for him, but instead of getting it on with her he dumps her, making her stalk him. A black cop finds out Dexter is the bad guy, and tries to stop him, because Dexter realizes he is a sick fuck, he agrees, but the cop is later killed by the crazy stalker ex, who is then killed by Dexter. The black cop gets blamed for the crime, but that's ok since he was a goddamn lazy nigger anyway. Also, the FBI agent, after [[fuck|tapping]] the sister's sweet ass ([[Awesome|who was less than half his age]]), kicks it out into the street.

===Season 3===

Lots of filler, the highlight of the season is when Dexter gets a [[mexican|spic]] sidekick and tries to teach him things, but then the spic starts acting [[retarded]] and so Dexter decides to kill his ass, but the spic tries to kill him back, but then he [[fails]] and is killed like he should have been the moment he illegally entered the country.

===Season 4===
[[File:Oh! The darkness you can dream by DrFaustusAU.png|285px|right]]

Even more filler, also Dexter's baby is demented, and the guy he kills at the end killed his wife, [[lulz]]. The FBI guy returns to tap Deb's ass once more, only to get [[pwned]] in the second episode. [[Nobody cares|The two main spics get married to each other]]. Basically, the main message of this season '[[O rly?|Serial killers shouldn't have children]]'.

===Season 5===
It all gets interesting when a group of men [[rape|raep]] loads of womens, and some [[sick fuck]]s at the FBI watch videos of them being tortured and raped. Dexter also begins to fuck one of the victims, while getting pissed off at some bible bashing babysitter. This series concludes with his sister almost finding him out while not opening up the curtains, because [[anonymous]] used [[hack]] sheets to counter her bitch cop instincts. Oh yeah, and the rape victim bitch leaves Dexter at the end, rendering the whole season completely fucking pointless with the ending scene making him transformed into a smiling assassin.
[[File:LumenReturnsToHerPlanet.gif|center|Lumen returns to her planet.]]

===Season 6===
Some [[christfag]] decides to [[Batshit_insane|recreate doom's day and kills many pplz]] with his professor [[Time_paradox|WHO'S BEEN DEAD BEFORE THE WHOLE SHIT'S EVEN BEGUN]] but gets [[pwnt]]. Meanwhile Dexter meets some [[nigger]] who [[Duh|dies after some episodes]], his sister goes [[emo]].
At the very end his sister finally decides to care and she finds out who [[Sick_fuck|he really is]]. A gimmick for the [[Retards|fans]] to [[Shit_brix|shit their pants]] waiting the next [[Shit|excellent]] season.

===Season 7===
[[File:Got My Eyes On You.gif|thumb|Got mah eyes on you...]]
In an attempt to render Season 6 almost as pointless as Season 5, both the new PD nigger and the [[Otaku|creepy]], [[Computer Science III|Techno-Wizard]] [[newfag]] is unceremoniously killed off by some [[gangster|mobster]] [[ruskie]]s (okay, "[[Shit nobody cares about|The Ukrainian Mafia]]", [[no one|but who the fuck can tell the difference]]?), who's leader, a [[britfag]] [[Trying too hard|giving his best attempt]] at a Russian accent, will apparently be the ineffectual villain of this season. Meanwhile Debra makes a half-hearted attempt to dissuade Dexter from his serial-killing ways, that lasts the whole of one-and-a-half episode. Expect the writers to ramp up the juicy [[incest]] angle and milk it for all it is worth. It also makes her [[cum|wet]] when Dexter tells her he killed [[Cunt|Spetzler]], plus for extra [[lulz]], when he yells [[Fuck]] to troll Spetzler while acting totally [[batshit insane]]. Stay tuned for next week's episode when he crosses with [[britfag]] the terminator and [[bitch|LaGuerta]] as she begins to give a shit about Dexter's habit and we hope she gets shot to death by Debra in the series finale.

Don't forget more [[incest]], it'll keep the [[rednecks]] pleased. Previously, [[England|Issac]] goes apeshit and kills everyone in a bar because he was being [[trolled]] by [[pretty_cool_guy|Dexter]], and ends up in [[prison]], meanwhile him and fugly [[sister]] share a room, but she wasn't totally [[asking for it]] yet. And it was too predictable enough for Debra to burn away the evidence enough for Dexter to keep up his [[sick_fuck|sick fuckery]]. Which would piss off [[bitch|LaGuerta]] because [[nigger|Doakes]] isn't alive to surprise [[motherfuckers]].

Once again, Dexter fucks another blonde named Hannah aka Sarah who properly never regained her memory and become a psycho killer, and because Dexter wants to [[rape]] hot women on the table, which will properly make her [[dead|an hero]] by the end of the season. Nice job. Issac, the fake accent russian mafia boss does nothing of [[Unwarranted Self-Importance]] by killing Colombians for [[lulz]]. Also Debra dates a [[300|Spartan]], some guy who wants to rape Hannah as well, it's pretty much a raping season from here on out. [[lol]] Debra's boytoy for a couple of episodes gets [[pwn|fucked]] by Hannah McKay with poison ivy or some shit, because she properly wants a [[threesome]] with [[Incest|Deb and Dexter]] and was [[jealous]]. Hannah's dad comes by to visit, dies in one episode, because fuck no, Dexter has to ruin his shit and dump him in the ocean. Because he can. The Dark Passenger is fucked, so Dexter can kill everything in his path without consequences, cause [[John Locke]] will join him on his crusade. LaBitch is still on Dexter's ass, hopefully enough for Debra to rape her [[spic]][[nigger]] shitter off the finale. Everything went according to plan, because it scares us terribly we knew this would happen, after the first episode when LaBitch went on a search to clear Doakes' name with the help of a [[oldfag]] (who hilariously insults her every conversation), so Dexter and Deb walk aimlessly though the new year to make us cream for the next season. SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER, Doakes comes back to show us things we already knew that he was onto Dexter. :| Sadly, Dex and Deb didn't fuck.

<center><youtube>4mWRkg4C6ek</youtube> '''[[Batshit_Insane|Lulzy Scene From Season 7]]'''</center>

===Season 8===

The season starts off with Dexter free from killing [[bitch|LaGuerta]], but his sister turned into a [[sick fuck]] and doesn't want to talk him or have [[incest]]. Some guy grabs her ass, which makes Dexter jealous and wasn't alpha male enough. And confronts her slutty ass that he wasn't on top six months earlier. Then we meet some [[oldfag]] named Vogel who doesn't want to be [[raped]] by some invisible surgeon, that reveals she helped Harry create the code to see where the sick fuckery started. Though it's horribly pointless. Then Dexter and Deb go in a "you're lost, no you're lost" [[the game]]. So immature. When Dexter wanted to kill some Mexican faggot, Deb got in the way and shot the fucker dead to show she wants to be like Dexter. To skip through all this shit, [[Swearing|Debra]] [[trolls]] Dexter into driving with him, but they end up [[I_see_what_you_did_there|"swimming deep"]]. The rest of the season is actually them being dead in Purgatory. I'm not kidding. And oh Hannah kidnaps little boys to show how serious she is and heads off to some city you'll never visit. And molests him, the end. But of course, Dexter kills Debra in the end by drowning her carcass into the sea. [[TL;DR]], Dexter ends up living [[forever_alone]], so he can survive do more sick fuckery in the next season that ruins the show even more. To repeat what you thought was a better finale to this shit.

===Season 9 "New Blood"===

Dexter comes back to our screens in a reboot, [[at least 100]] years later, for more emo bloody shit, since he's guilt ridden after pwning his sister. More sick fuckery ensures when new serial killer [[KFC|Clancy Brown]](Yeah, the main villan is a Colonel Sanders lookalike) as goes head to head as the new villian of sick fuckery, because it wasn't enough for Dexter to do what he does, to cause some more [[lulz]]. Except, his dumb ass son comes back to troll him because Hannah, his hot piece of ass step mother who got pwned by [[cancer]] told him to go find his sick fuck father in [[Oregon]] so they can do more sick fuck stuff together, seeing as he's so fucked up like his father. Nonetheless, [[tl;dr]], Dexter and his son flee from the [[police]], after Dexter killed a [[nigger]] that no one gives a shit about when being caught by his bitch girlfriend, Angela. Being the dumbass, Dexter asks his son to pwn him. Harrison is given money by the only bitch cop that doesn't know shit about Harrison also being a [[sick fuck]] to start a new life to continue Dexter's sick fuckery, rendering the entire series, pointless. And yeah, they're making a spinoff about the little shit, can't wait to [[tl;dr]] this article. NOPE, Dexter ressurrects once again in his new series, since they can't let this shit go.

===Season 10 "Resurrection"===
Since you couldn't get enough of Dexter and wanted to kill yourself for watching the shit that was New Blood, they go for another cashgrab to milk it all its' worth. He's in New York City this time, and didn't have enough time to do [[9/11]]

==Memorable quotes==

{{quote|Surprise, Motherfucker!|Doakes (Season 1, Episode 12)}}

{{quote|UhhhhhuhuhhuhhhuhhhhhaaaaaAAHAHAHAHAAAAHHHHHH! HUAHHHHUH!|Dexter (Season 4, Episode 1) [[Retard|Srsly]].}}

{{quote|You Get What You Fucking Deserve.|Dexter (Season 6, Episode 9)}}

===Shitty Fresh Prince Rewrite===
[[File:Dexter killed you.JPG|thumb]]
'''''Humble Beginnings'''''

Now this is the story all about how 
My life got flipped, turned upside down 
An' I'd like to take a minute just sit right there< 
I'll tell you how I became The Bay Harbor Butcher 

[[Casey Anthony|Sanford, Florida born and raised]] 
Killing animals's how I spent most my days 
Chilling out maxing relaxing killing a duck 
Till my dad Harry noticed that i was a sick fuck 
And started teaching me this code of rules 
I killed one little crook and my dad got scared 
And said "oh lawds ima have a big heart attack" 

I whistled for a cab and when it came near 
The license plate said blood and had a knife in the mirror 
If anything, I thought that this cab was [[Awesome|kool]] 
So fuck it, I said, take me to a medical school 

After learning how to cut I realised that 
I should be a cop instead of a [[Doctor|white hat]] 
Looked at my life and realised I was there 
To kill every fucker until [[noone]] was left 

==Gallery==

<center>
<gallery>
File:Dexter blood sugar advice.jpg
File:Dexterpointy.JPG
File:YouTube double ads inventor grave.jpg
File:Dexter and Dee Dee.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

==Videos==

{{videoframe|DexVids|background-color: #FF6666;|font-weight: bold;
|
<youtube>WM5_pac-4Is</youtube>''Dexter in 60 Seconds''
|
<youtube>5vzizY_JLrk</youtube>''Dexter and Brian [[Masturbating]] With [[Swearing|Deb]]''}}

==See also==
*[[Brokeback Mountain]]
*[[Law & Order]]
*[[Sociopath]]
*[[Murder]]
*[[Pretty cool guy]]
*[[Wincest]]
{{Television}}

Dexter

2025-05-30T03:54:28Z

Lazarus: /* Season 9 "New Blood" */

{{spoiler|Before Dexter is killed by his own son, his brother is the ice truck killer and Dexter [[pwns]] him. Doakes (bay harbour butcher) and Rita (killed by trinity killer) and Debra and Vogal (killed by brain surgeon) and Lay "best blows" Guerta all fucking die an excruciatingly painful death.
'''Deb finds her urges to [[incest|fuck Dex]] and instead finds out Dex's urges to [[sociopath|kill people]]. Deb kills LaGuerta to save Dex's truth and gets PTSD! Happy New Year! He fakes his death because his [[over 9000|9001th]] girlfriend (Hannah McGay) and son are apparently bound to die because of him.. – becoming a [[shit no one cares about|lumberjack]]. How [[house|original]]. 10 years later his son finds him after mother Hannah dies of cancer for some reason, Dexter then finds his son somehow also has killing urges, and then Dexter gets caught. THE END!!1112'''}}
[[File:Sorry wrong person Dexter.jpg|right|300px]]
[[Image:Dex lab.jpg|thumb|No, not that Dexter]]

'''''Dexter''''' is a TV series (based from book) about a moral [[serial-killer]]/[[sick fuck]] in [[Miami]] named ''Dexter Morgan'', or by friends just ''Dex''. By day he's a forensic [[blood]]-[[squirting|spatter]] analyst who works for the [[pigs|cops]] of Florida. But, much like every [[superhero]] he stalks/vets out and catches criminals, except he ends with [[murder|slaughter]]ing them; by [[aspergers syndrome|aspie]] monologue and thrusting deep into their organs with his long hard blade and inner [[black cock|big black passenger]].

[[File:TV series inspirations.png|thumb|Dexter has inspired many]]

His mother got [[pwnt]] into pieces with a chainsaw in front both him and his older brother Brian, left in a literal pool of blood for days. Causing them to be traumatized for life. However, a [[stereotypical]] policeman, Harry, had guilt's [[trolls remorse|sympathy]] because it was his fault Dexter's mom was murdered, so he adopted him, but left Brian because he was already fucked. And eventually to Harry's dismay Dexter was also one sick fuck!! After Harry commits [[suicide]], Dexter is downcast for approximately 9 seconds. because his reject sister is alive and he has a girlfriend that makes him [[sammich]] and has little children to distract him with and has Long story short, he kills criminals [[For the lulz|because he can]].

==Season storylines==
===Season 1===
[[File:Julie_Benz.jpg|thumb|150px|Dexter's hot girlfriend. [[homosexual|Don't like?]]]]

It all starts with Dexter killing people and trying to find this other serial killer is also a pretty cool guy, talks with fellow [[cops]] (who are mostly [[spics]] because it's Miami.) gets accused of beign a [[sick fuck]] by a [[nigger]] cop, monologues and kills random ass criminals for 20 episodes while trying to fight his homosexuality enough to fuck his girlfriend and [[rape|play with]] her kids.
It turns out his brother is actually the other serial killer and offers Dexter to join him and be killers but Dexter says no and [[pwns]] him, which makes no fucking sense.

===Season 2===
[[File:Lilah-west 480x640.jpg|thumb|[[A challenger appears]].]]

Secret's out and lots of dead bodies are found. A [[party van|FBI]] agent is called in and wants to hit Dexter's sister; Dexter wants the same. This makes our hero very jealous. His girlfriend thinks he's chasing the dragon so she sends him to rehab. In rehab he meets a woman who has da hots for him, but instead of getting it on with her he dumps her, making her stalk him. A black cop finds out Dexter is the bad guy, and tries to stop him, because Dexter realizes he is a sick fuck, he agrees, but the cop is later killed by the crazy stalker ex, who is then killed by Dexter. The black cop gets blamed for the crime, but that's ok since he was a goddamn lazy nigger anyway. Also, the FBI agent, after [[fuck|tapping]] the sister's sweet ass ([[Awesome|who was less than half his age]]), kicks it out into the street.

===Season 3===

Lots of filler, the highlight of the season is when Dexter gets a [[mexican|spic]] sidekick and tries to teach him things, but then the spic starts acting [[retarded]] and so Dexter decides to kill his ass, but the spic tries to kill him back, but then he [[fails]] and is killed like he should have been the moment he illegally entered the country.

===Season 4===
[[File:Oh! The darkness you can dream by DrFaustusAU.png|285px|right]]

Even more filler, also Dexter's baby is demented, and the guy he kills at the end killed his wife, [[lulz]]. The FBI guy returns to tap Deb's ass once more, only to get [[pwned]] in the second episode. [[Nobody cares|The two main spics get married to each other]]. Basically, the main message of this season '[[O rly?|Serial killers shouldn't have children]]'.

===Season 5===
It all gets interesting when a group of men [[rape|raep]] loads of womens, and some [[sick fuck]]s at the FBI watch videos of them being tortured and raped. Dexter also begins to fuck one of the victims, while getting pissed off at some bible bashing babysitter. This series concludes with his sister almost finding him out while not opening up the curtains, because [[anonymous]] used [[hack]] sheets to counter her bitch cop instincts. Oh yeah, and the rape victim bitch leaves Dexter at the end, rendering the whole season completely fucking pointless with the ending scene making him transformed into a smiling assassin.
[[File:LumenReturnsToHerPlanet.gif|center|Lumen returns to her planet.]]

===Season 6===
Some [[christfag]] decides to [[Batshit_insane|recreate doom's day and kills many pplz]] with his professor [[Time_paradox|WHO'S BEEN DEAD BEFORE THE WHOLE SHIT'S EVEN BEGUN]] but gets [[pwnt]]. Meanwhile Dexter meets some [[nigger]] who [[Duh|dies after some episodes]], his sister goes [[emo]].
At the very end his sister finally decides to care and she finds out who [[Sick_fuck|he really is]]. A gimmick for the [[Retards|fans]] to [[Shit_brix|shit their pants]] waiting the next [[Shit|excellent]] season.

===Season 7===
[[File:Got My Eyes On You.gif|thumb|Got mah eyes on you...]]
In an attempt to render Season 6 almost as pointless as Season 5, both the new PD nigger and the [[Otaku|creepy]], [[Computer Science III|Techno-Wizard]] [[newfag]] is unceremoniously killed off by some [[gangster|mobster]] [[ruskie]]s (okay, "[[Shit nobody cares about|The Ukrainian Mafia]]", [[no one|but who the fuck can tell the difference]]?), who's leader, a [[britfag]] [[Trying too hard|giving his best attempt]] at a Russian accent, will apparently be the ineffectual villain of this season. Meanwhile Debra makes a half-hearted attempt to dissuade Dexter from his serial-killing ways, that lasts the whole of one-and-a-half episode. Expect the writers to ramp up the juicy [[incest]] angle and milk it for all it is worth. It also makes her [[cum|wet]] when Dexter tells her he killed [[Cunt|Spetzler]], plus for extra [[lulz]], when he yells [[Fuck]] to troll Spetzler while acting totally [[batshit insane]]. Stay tuned for next week's episode when he crosses with [[britfag]] the terminator and [[bitch|LaGuerta]] as she begins to give a shit about Dexter's habit and we hope she gets shot to death by Debra in the series finale.

Don't forget more [[incest]], it'll keep the [[rednecks]] pleased. Previously, [[England|Issac]] goes apeshit and kills everyone in a bar because he was being [[trolled]] by [[pretty_cool_guy|Dexter]], and ends up in [[prison]], meanwhile him and fugly [[sister]] share a room, but she wasn't totally [[asking for it]] yet. And it was too predictable enough for Debra to burn away the evidence enough for Dexter to keep up his [[sick_fuck|sick fuckery]]. Which would piss off [[bitch|LaGuerta]] because [[nigger|Doakes]] isn't alive to surprise [[motherfuckers]].

Once again, Dexter fucks another blonde named Hannah aka Sarah who properly never regained her memory and become a psycho killer, and because Dexter wants to [[rape]] hot women on the table, which will properly make her [[dead|an hero]] by the end of the season. Nice job. Issac, the fake accent russian mafia boss does nothing of [[Unwarranted Self-Importance]] by killing Colombians for [[lulz]]. Also Debra dates a [[300|Spartan]], some guy who wants to rape Hannah as well, it's pretty much a raping season from here on out. [[lol]] Debra's boytoy for a couple of episodes gets [[pwn|fucked]] by Hannah McKay with poison ivy or some shit, because she properly wants a [[threesome]] with [[Incest|Deb and Dexter]] and was [[jealous]]. Hannah's dad comes by to visit, dies in one episode, because fuck no, Dexter has to ruin his shit and dump him in the ocean. Because he can. The Dark Passenger is fucked, so Dexter can kill everything in his path without consequences, cause [[John Locke]] will join him on his crusade. LaBitch is still on Dexter's ass, hopefully enough for Debra to rape her [[spic]][[nigger]] shitter off the finale. Everything went according to plan, because it scares us terribly we knew this would happen, after the first episode when LaBitch went on a search to clear Doakes' name with the help of a [[oldfag]] (who hilariously insults her every conversation), so Dexter and Deb walk aimlessly though the new year to make us cream for the next season. SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER, Doakes comes back to show us things we already knew that he was onto Dexter. :| Sadly, Dex and Deb didn't fuck.

<center><youtube>4mWRkg4C6ek</youtube> '''[[Batshit_Insane|Lulzy Scene From Season 7]]'''</center>

===Season 8===

The season starts off with Dexter free from killing [[bitch|LaGuerta]], but his sister turned into a [[sick fuck]] and doesn't want to talk him or have [[incest]]. Some guy grabs her ass, which makes Dexter jealous and wasn't alpha male enough. And confronts her slutty ass that he wasn't on top six months earlier. Then we meet some [[oldfag]] named Vogel who doesn't want to be [[raped]] by some invisible surgeon, that reveals she helped Harry create the code to see where the sick fuckery started. Though it's horribly pointless. Then Dexter and Deb go in a "you're lost, no you're lost" [[the game]]. So immature. When Dexter wanted to kill some Mexican faggot, Deb got in the way and shot the fucker dead to show she wants to be like Dexter. To skip through all this shit, [[Swearing|Debra]] [[trolls]] Dexter into driving with him, but they end up [[I_see_what_you_did_there|"swimming deep"]]. The rest of the season is actually them being dead in Purgatory. I'm not kidding. And oh Hannah kidnaps little boys to show how serious she is and heads off to some city you'll never visit. And molests him, the end. But of course, Dexter kills Debra in the end by drowning her carcass into the sea. [[TL;DR]], Dexter ends up living [[forever_alone]], so he can survive do more sick fuckery in the next season that ruins the show even more. To repeat what you thought was a better finale to this shit.

===Season 9 "New Blood"===

Dexter comes back to our screens in a reboot, [[at least 100]] years later, for more emo bloody shit, since he's guilt ridden after pwning his sister. More sick fuckery ensures when new serial killer [[KFC|Clancy Brown]](Yeah, the main villan is a Colonel Sanders lookalike) as goes head to head as the new villian of sick fuckery, because it wasn't enough for Dexter to do what he does, to cause some more [[lulz]]. Except, his dumb ass son comes back to troll him because Hannah, his hot piece of ass step mother who got pwned by [[cancer]] told him to go find his sick fuck father in [[Oregon]] so they can do more sick fuck stuff together, seeing as he's so fucked up like his father. Nonetheless, [[tl;dr]], Dexter and his son flee from the [[police]], after Dexter killed a [[nigger]] that no one gives a shit about when being caught by his bitch girlfriend, Angela. Being the dumbass, Dexter asks his son to pwn him. Harrison is given money by the only bitch cop that doesn't know shit about Harrison also being a [[sick fuck]] to start a new life to continue Dexter's sick fuckery, rendering the entire series, pointless. And yeah, they're making a spinoff about the little shit, can't wait to [[tl;dr]] this article. NOPE, Dexter ressurrects once again in his new series, since they can't let this shit go.

===Season 10 "Resurrections"===
Since you couldn't get enough of Dexter, they go for another cashgrab to milk it all its' worth. He's in New York City this time, and didn't have enough time to do [[9/11]]

==Memorable quotes==

{{quote|Surprise, Motherfucker!|Doakes (Season 1, Episode 12)}}

{{quote|UhhhhhuhuhhuhhhuhhhhhaaaaaAAHAHAHAHAAAAHHHHHH! HUAHHHHUH!|Dexter (Season 4, Episode 1) [[Retard|Srsly]].}}

{{quote|You Get What You Fucking Deserve.|Dexter (Season 6, Episode 9)}}

===Shitty Fresh Prince Rewrite===
[[File:Dexter killed you.JPG|thumb]]
'''''Humble Beginnings'''''

Now this is the story all about how 
My life got flipped, turned upside down 
An' I'd like to take a minute just sit right there< 
I'll tell you how I became The Bay Harbor Butcher 

[[Casey Anthony|Sanford, Florida born and raised]] 
Killing animals's how I spent most my days 
Chilling out maxing relaxing killing a duck 
Till my dad Harry noticed that i was a sick fuck 
And started teaching me this code of rules 
I killed one little crook and my dad got scared 
And said "oh lawds ima have a big heart attack" 

I whistled for a cab and when it came near 
The license plate said blood and had a knife in the mirror 
If anything, I thought that this cab was [[Awesome|kool]] 
So fuck it, I said, take me to a medical school 

After learning how to cut I realised that 
I should be a cop instead of a [[Doctor|white hat]] 
Looked at my life and realised I was there 
To kill every fucker until [[noone]] was left 

==Gallery==

<center>
<gallery>
File:Dexter blood sugar advice.jpg
File:Dexterpointy.JPG
File:YouTube double ads inventor grave.jpg
File:Dexter and Dee Dee.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

==Videos==

{{videoframe|DexVids|background-color: #FF6666;|font-weight: bold;
|
<youtube>WM5_pac-4Is</youtube>''Dexter in 60 Seconds''
|
<youtube>5vzizY_JLrk</youtube>''Dexter and Brian [[Masturbating]] With [[Swearing|Deb]]''}}

==See also==
*[[Brokeback Mountain]]
*[[Law & Order]]
*[[Sociopath]]
*[[Murder]]
*[[Pretty cool guy]]
*[[Wincest]]
{{Television}}

Dexter

2025-05-30T03:51:47Z

Lazarus: /* Season 9 "New Blood" */

{{spoiler|Before Dexter is killed by his own son, his brother is the ice truck killer and Dexter [[pwns]] him. Doakes (bay harbour butcher) and Rita (killed by trinity killer) and Debra and Vogal (killed by brain surgeon) and Lay "best blows" Guerta all fucking die an excruciatingly painful death.
'''Deb finds her urges to [[incest|fuck Dex]] and instead finds out Dex's urges to [[sociopath|kill people]]. Deb kills LaGuerta to save Dex's truth and gets PTSD! Happy New Year! He fakes his death because his [[over 9000|9001th]] girlfriend (Hannah McGay) and son are apparently bound to die because of him.. – becoming a [[shit no one cares about|lumberjack]]. How [[house|original]]. 10 years later his son finds him after mother Hannah dies of cancer for some reason, Dexter then finds his son somehow also has killing urges, and then Dexter gets caught. THE END!!1112'''}}
[[File:Sorry wrong person Dexter.jpg|right|300px]]
[[Image:Dex lab.jpg|thumb|No, not that Dexter]]

'''''Dexter''''' is a TV series (based from book) about a moral [[serial-killer]]/[[sick fuck]] in [[Miami]] named ''Dexter Morgan'', or by friends just ''Dex''. By day he's a forensic [[blood]]-[[squirting|spatter]] analyst who works for the [[pigs|cops]] of Florida. But, much like every [[superhero]] he stalks/vets out and catches criminals, except he ends with [[murder|slaughter]]ing them; by [[aspergers syndrome|aspie]] monologue and thrusting deep into their organs with his long hard blade and inner [[black cock|big black passenger]].

[[File:TV series inspirations.png|thumb|Dexter has inspired many]]

His mother got [[pwnt]] into pieces with a chainsaw in front both him and his older brother Brian, left in a literal pool of blood for days. Causing them to be traumatized for life. However, a [[stereotypical]] policeman, Harry, had guilt's [[trolls remorse|sympathy]] because it was his fault Dexter's mom was murdered, so he adopted him, but left Brian because he was already fucked. And eventually to Harry's dismay Dexter was also one sick fuck!! After Harry commits [[suicide]], Dexter is downcast for approximately 9 seconds. because his reject sister is alive and he has a girlfriend that makes him [[sammich]] and has little children to distract him with and has Long story short, he kills criminals [[For the lulz|because he can]].

==Season storylines==
===Season 1===
[[File:Julie_Benz.jpg|thumb|150px|Dexter's hot girlfriend. [[homosexual|Don't like?]]]]

It all starts with Dexter killing people and trying to find this other serial killer is also a pretty cool guy, talks with fellow [[cops]] (who are mostly [[spics]] because it's Miami.) gets accused of beign a [[sick fuck]] by a [[nigger]] cop, monologues and kills random ass criminals for 20 episodes while trying to fight his homosexuality enough to fuck his girlfriend and [[rape|play with]] her kids.
It turns out his brother is actually the other serial killer and offers Dexter to join him and be killers but Dexter says no and [[pwns]] him, which makes no fucking sense.

===Season 2===
[[File:Lilah-west 480x640.jpg|thumb|[[A challenger appears]].]]

Secret's out and lots of dead bodies are found. A [[party van|FBI]] agent is called in and wants to hit Dexter's sister; Dexter wants the same. This makes our hero very jealous. His girlfriend thinks he's chasing the dragon so she sends him to rehab. In rehab he meets a woman who has da hots for him, but instead of getting it on with her he dumps her, making her stalk him. A black cop finds out Dexter is the bad guy, and tries to stop him, because Dexter realizes he is a sick fuck, he agrees, but the cop is later killed by the crazy stalker ex, who is then killed by Dexter. The black cop gets blamed for the crime, but that's ok since he was a goddamn lazy nigger anyway. Also, the FBI agent, after [[fuck|tapping]] the sister's sweet ass ([[Awesome|who was less than half his age]]), kicks it out into the street.

===Season 3===

Lots of filler, the highlight of the season is when Dexter gets a [[mexican|spic]] sidekick and tries to teach him things, but then the spic starts acting [[retarded]] and so Dexter decides to kill his ass, but the spic tries to kill him back, but then he [[fails]] and is killed like he should have been the moment he illegally entered the country.

===Season 4===
[[File:Oh! The darkness you can dream by DrFaustusAU.png|285px|right]]

Even more filler, also Dexter's baby is demented, and the guy he kills at the end killed his wife, [[lulz]]. The FBI guy returns to tap Deb's ass once more, only to get [[pwned]] in the second episode. [[Nobody cares|The two main spics get married to each other]]. Basically, the main message of this season '[[O rly?|Serial killers shouldn't have children]]'.

===Season 5===
It all gets interesting when a group of men [[rape|raep]] loads of womens, and some [[sick fuck]]s at the FBI watch videos of them being tortured and raped. Dexter also begins to fuck one of the victims, while getting pissed off at some bible bashing babysitter. This series concludes with his sister almost finding him out while not opening up the curtains, because [[anonymous]] used [[hack]] sheets to counter her bitch cop instincts. Oh yeah, and the rape victim bitch leaves Dexter at the end, rendering the whole season completely fucking pointless with the ending scene making him transformed into a smiling assassin.
[[File:LumenReturnsToHerPlanet.gif|center|Lumen returns to her planet.]]

===Season 6===
Some [[christfag]] decides to [[Batshit_insane|recreate doom's day and kills many pplz]] with his professor [[Time_paradox|WHO'S BEEN DEAD BEFORE THE WHOLE SHIT'S EVEN BEGUN]] but gets [[pwnt]]. Meanwhile Dexter meets some [[nigger]] who [[Duh|dies after some episodes]], his sister goes [[emo]].
At the very end his sister finally decides to care and she finds out who [[Sick_fuck|he really is]]. A gimmick for the [[Retards|fans]] to [[Shit_brix|shit their pants]] waiting the next [[Shit|excellent]] season.

===Season 7===
[[File:Got My Eyes On You.gif|thumb|Got mah eyes on you...]]
In an attempt to render Season 6 almost as pointless as Season 5, both the new PD nigger and the [[Otaku|creepy]], [[Computer Science III|Techno-Wizard]] [[newfag]] is unceremoniously killed off by some [[gangster|mobster]] [[ruskie]]s (okay, "[[Shit nobody cares about|The Ukrainian Mafia]]", [[no one|but who the fuck can tell the difference]]?), who's leader, a [[britfag]] [[Trying too hard|giving his best attempt]] at a Russian accent, will apparently be the ineffectual villain of this season. Meanwhile Debra makes a half-hearted attempt to dissuade Dexter from his serial-killing ways, that lasts the whole of one-and-a-half episode. Expect the writers to ramp up the juicy [[incest]] angle and milk it for all it is worth. It also makes her [[cum|wet]] when Dexter tells her he killed [[Cunt|Spetzler]], plus for extra [[lulz]], when he yells [[Fuck]] to troll Spetzler while acting totally [[batshit insane]]. Stay tuned for next week's episode when he crosses with [[britfag]] the terminator and [[bitch|LaGuerta]] as she begins to give a shit about Dexter's habit and we hope she gets shot to death by Debra in the series finale.

Don't forget more [[incest]], it'll keep the [[rednecks]] pleased. Previously, [[England|Issac]] goes apeshit and kills everyone in a bar because he was being [[trolled]] by [[pretty_cool_guy|Dexter]], and ends up in [[prison]], meanwhile him and fugly [[sister]] share a room, but she wasn't totally [[asking for it]] yet. And it was too predictable enough for Debra to burn away the evidence enough for Dexter to keep up his [[sick_fuck|sick fuckery]]. Which would piss off [[bitch|LaGuerta]] because [[nigger|Doakes]] isn't alive to surprise [[motherfuckers]].

Once again, Dexter fucks another blonde named Hannah aka Sarah who properly never regained her memory and become a psycho killer, and because Dexter wants to [[rape]] hot women on the table, which will properly make her [[dead|an hero]] by the end of the season. Nice job. Issac, the fake accent russian mafia boss does nothing of [[Unwarranted Self-Importance]] by killing Colombians for [[lulz]]. Also Debra dates a [[300|Spartan]], some guy who wants to rape Hannah as well, it's pretty much a raping season from here on out. [[lol]] Debra's boytoy for a couple of episodes gets [[pwn|fucked]] by Hannah McKay with poison ivy or some shit, because she properly wants a [[threesome]] with [[Incest|Deb and Dexter]] and was [[jealous]]. Hannah's dad comes by to visit, dies in one episode, because fuck no, Dexter has to ruin his shit and dump him in the ocean. Because he can. The Dark Passenger is fucked, so Dexter can kill everything in his path without consequences, cause [[John Locke]] will join him on his crusade. LaBitch is still on Dexter's ass, hopefully enough for Debra to rape her [[spic]][[nigger]] shitter off the finale. Everything went according to plan, because it scares us terribly we knew this would happen, after the first episode when LaBitch went on a search to clear Doakes' name with the help of a [[oldfag]] (who hilariously insults her every conversation), so Dexter and Deb walk aimlessly though the new year to make us cream for the next season. SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER, Doakes comes back to show us things we already knew that he was onto Dexter. :| Sadly, Dex and Deb didn't fuck.

<center><youtube>4mWRkg4C6ek</youtube> '''[[Batshit_Insane|Lulzy Scene From Season 7]]'''</center>

===Season 8===

The season starts off with Dexter free from killing [[bitch|LaGuerta]], but his sister turned into a [[sick fuck]] and doesn't want to talk him or have [[incest]]. Some guy grabs her ass, which makes Dexter jealous and wasn't alpha male enough. And confronts her slutty ass that he wasn't on top six months earlier. Then we meet some [[oldfag]] named Vogel who doesn't want to be [[raped]] by some invisible surgeon, that reveals she helped Harry create the code to see where the sick fuckery started. Though it's horribly pointless. Then Dexter and Deb go in a "you're lost, no you're lost" [[the game]]. So immature. When Dexter wanted to kill some Mexican faggot, Deb got in the way and shot the fucker dead to show she wants to be like Dexter. To skip through all this shit, [[Swearing|Debra]] [[trolls]] Dexter into driving with him, but they end up [[I_see_what_you_did_there|"swimming deep"]]. The rest of the season is actually them being dead in Purgatory. I'm not kidding. And oh Hannah kidnaps little boys to show how serious she is and heads off to some city you'll never visit. And molests him, the end. But of course, Dexter kills Debra in the end by drowning her carcass into the sea. [[TL;DR]], Dexter ends up living [[forever_alone]], so he can survive do more sick fuckery in the next season that ruins the show even more. To repeat what you thought was a better finale to this shit.

===Season 9 "New Blood"===

Dexter comes back to our screens in a reboot, [[at least 100]] years later, for more emo bloody shit, since he's guilt ridden after pwning his sister. More sick fuckery ensures when new serial killer [[KFC|Clancy Brown]](Yeah, the main villan is a Colonel Sanders lookalike) as goes head to head as the new villian of sick fuckery, because it wasn't enough for Dexter to do what he does, to cause some more [[lulz]]. Except, his dumb ass son comes back to troll him because Hannah, his hot piece of ass step mother who got pwned by [[cancer]] told him to go find his sick fuck father in [[Oregon]] so they can do more sick fuck stuff together, seeing as he's so fucked up like his father. Nonetheless, [[tl;dr]], Dexter and his son flee from the [[police]], after Dexter killed a [[nigger]] that no one gives a shit about when being caught by his bitch girlfriend, Angela. Being the dumbass, Dexter asks his son to pwn him. Harrison is given money by the only bitch cop that doesn't know shit about Harrison also being a [[sick fuck]] to start a new life to continue Dexter's sick fuckery, rendering the entire series, pointless. And yeah, they're making a spinoff about the little shit, can't wait to [[tl;dr]] this article. NOPE, disgread that, Dexter resurrects once again in another new series, since they can't let this shit go, since no one seems to liked that ending. AGAIN!. What a bunch of pussies.

==Memorable quotes==

{{quote|Surprise, Motherfucker!|Doakes (Season 1, Episode 12)}}

{{quote|UhhhhhuhuhhuhhhuhhhhhaaaaaAAHAHAHAHAAAAHHHHHH! HUAHHHHUH!|Dexter (Season 4, Episode 1) [[Retard|Srsly]].}}

{{quote|You Get What You Fucking Deserve.|Dexter (Season 6, Episode 9)}}

===Shitty Fresh Prince Rewrite===
[[File:Dexter killed you.JPG|thumb]]
'''''Humble Beginnings'''''

Now this is the story all about how 
My life got flipped, turned upside down 
An' I'd like to take a minute just sit right there< 
I'll tell you how I became The Bay Harbor Butcher 

[[Casey Anthony|Sanford, Florida born and raised]] 
Killing animals's how I spent most my days 
Chilling out maxing relaxing killing a duck 
Till my dad Harry noticed that i was a sick fuck 
And started teaching me this code of rules 
I killed one little crook and my dad got scared 
And said "oh lawds ima have a big heart attack" 

I whistled for a cab and when it came near 
The license plate said blood and had a knife in the mirror 
If anything, I thought that this cab was [[Awesome|kool]] 
So fuck it, I said, take me to a medical school 

After learning how to cut I realised that 
I should be a cop instead of a [[Doctor|white hat]] 
Looked at my life and realised I was there 
To kill every fucker until [[noone]] was left 

==Gallery==

<center>
<gallery>
File:Dexter blood sugar advice.jpg
File:Dexterpointy.JPG
File:YouTube double ads inventor grave.jpg
File:Dexter and Dee Dee.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

==Videos==

{{videoframe|DexVids|background-color: #FF6666;|font-weight: bold;
|
<youtube>WM5_pac-4Is</youtube>''Dexter in 60 Seconds''
|
<youtube>5vzizY_JLrk</youtube>''Dexter and Brian [[Masturbating]] With [[Swearing|Deb]]''}}

==See also==
*[[Brokeback Mountain]]
*[[Law & Order]]
*[[Sociopath]]
*[[Murder]]
*[[Pretty cool guy]]
*[[Wincest]]
{{Television}}

Intellectual Checkmate

2025-01-06T01:54:42Z

Lazarus: /* Gallery */

{{cleanup}}
[[Image:AgoronchekVandal.jpg|center]]
[[Image:Moronchev.jpg|thumb|Goronchev, pitifully declaring war against the [[Internet Hate Machine]].]]
[[Image:Gay gon.jpg|thumb|Ladies and gentlemen, meet the [[lol|Sexiest Man in the World]]!]]
[[Image:Check mate.jpg|thumb|Moar liek Intellectually Challenged amirite]]
'''Goronchev''' (AKA Smugfag, MrThreePercent, Ron Lamp, Andy Ross and "Ass Lamp") is a 30-something, balding, closeted [[homosexual]] born in 17 Oct(March 12?), as a cancer survivor without testicles who plays Quasimodo in [[basement-dweller|his parents' basement]] in [[Hollywood]], [[California|CA]] who spends his life combating [[DOX|doc_droppers]] because he is so [[9/11|brave]]. Having lived in his basement his whole life with a lonely, beautiful and ultimately pure terabyte of [[child pornography]] to [[Fap|be his friend]], Goronchev realized that the only way [[TsimFuckis|someone like him]] could survive would be to post [[TL;DW]] videos of himself [[Attention whore|flexing his steroid-induced muscles]] and rubbing his asshole, while pretending to have knowledge of very [[intellectual]] topics such as [[Shit nobody cares about|religion, sex and video games]]. When not posing as the illegitimate, cancer-ridden son of Penn Jillete, he can often be found lurking on sites like [[Stickam]], attempting to bait [[16-year-old girls]] with minimal understanding of the English language and green cards into checking out his [[Bullshit|"above average"]] penis.

[[Some argue|Some would argue]] that he is not only a [[Slavery|keen mind of the West]], but the greatest [[troll]] known to Anon. That is assuming, of course, if "some" constituted an [[Watchmen|abattoir of retarded children]], who also believe the nuts in their shit has the [[Do i have potential|potential]] for homemade Nutella. Take heed, however, as combating this individual online will surely lead to one's demise! Well, at least it might lead to slight embarassment in his erotic chat party, if he's the only one talking. If that hurdle is crossed, then he will just resort to being the ultimate badass by contacting your parents, asking them to tell you to stop. If that doesn't work, then he will use his [[DotA|ultimate]] by contacting your local news media, hoping that "arguing with someone on the internet" is a hideous federal offense in your country.

{{Quote|My penis is so big it reaches from A - Z on the keyboard!|Goronchev, literally stating his penis is about ONE CENTIMETER LONG}}

==The Saga==
===Smugfag Begins===
[[Image:SeriousCat oscar wilde.jpeg|left|thumb|[[Serious Cat]] detects [[serious business]]]]
[[Image:Virtual bitchslap.jpg|thumb|Smugfag is smuuuuuuuuuuug.]]
Goronchev appeared on [[4chan]] in June of 2007 when a video of him was posted on [[B|/b/]] in which he claimed victory over the "misc. section". Paranoid [[Newfag|baby Anonymous]] ceased fapping to [[lolicon]] long enough to gangrape his [[YouTube]] with negative feedback and video responses, all while noisily banging their keyboards to produce spam comments (Consisting of [[DESU|DESU DESU DESU]] in natural /b/tard fashion). As things turned out, he was actually attacking the Misc. section at bodybuilding.com. Goronchev's attack on the Misc. section described his "intellectual checkmate" of Misc. by, as he put it, "using them like a condom." /b/ was slow to realize that they were not his target and [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tpSQmfBhUAg initially believed this was an insult], albeit a hilariously inept one. Even after the mistake was discovered, the attacks continued as his smugness made him an instant hit with /b/tards, who enjoyed making fun of his balding head, Minnie Mouse voice, and ridiculous claims about his [[Lie|sex life]] and intellectual prowess.

Trolls and rubberneckers at the time were delighted over Goronchev's [[Narcissism|obsession with his body]]. Of course, Goronchev was so concerned about maintaining his 3% body fat that he completely forgot about his round, balding head. Goronchev continued to feed the flames by claiming that his penis was [[LOL|almost nine inches long]] but not showing it off to prove his point. To this day Goronchev continues to make spurious claims about his member, though it is obvious to anyone with half a brain that this man is more full of shit than [[Tubgirl]].
[[Image:Retractedmicrowang.jpg|thumb|Actual photo of Goronchev's penis.]]
A [[YouTube]] user named Kbob08 used to plague Goronchev with video responses. Almost all of Kbob's videos were video responses to [[Faggot|Goronchev]] with the exception of his very first video which was just a [[retarded]] loogie of [[fail]] where he showed his bad taste in [[games]]. One day, feeling daring, Kbob decided to [[flame]] Goronchev using a video response. This prompted Goronchev to [[man the harpoons]] and end their relationship. Goronchev thoroughly "skewered and exposed" Kbob in a [[LOL WUT|video response to a video response for his video]]. Kbob deleted all Goronchev-related videos when TwinsanityNtranced was bashing on Kbob about being an attention leech. This victory by Goronchev only served to increase his already inflated ego and [[HUEG]] sense of [[unwarranted self-importance]]. He hired a [[Prostitute|publicist]], contacted Faux News, telling them that a new sensation was in town, who was sure to be just as funny as Jay Leno and started referring to his YouTube account as a television show.

===Operation: Intellectual Checkmate===
After a few months of inactivity, he returned in October of 2007. With a titanic ego and infinitesimal dick, he shed a tear of shame and admiration when he read this page. He then gathered himself together, mustered [[Cum|courage]] into his [[Cock|veins]] and declared war upon ED, posting a video in which he later admitted [[My mom just died|his mother is dead]]. "This was most likely suicide caused by the realization that she had given birth to such a grotesque creature instead of letting the doctor [[falcon punch]] her when he revealed that the baby might have a hazardous amount of smug cells," Dr. Anonymous states.

In a truly pathetic testament, Goronchev felt that his domination over ED was the greatest rape he was involved with since that one special time his dad needed help in the basement. For thirteen minutes, Goronchev read quotes from various ED articles that he felt were racist towards black people- as if this were something new. Going down the list of facts about him, he denied the claims to a minimal extent by adjusting minute details that he felt made the claims invalid. Of these claims, the one that he helt most offended by was that he attended a community college in Northern California, as he had never attended college and he never made it farther North than his dad's penis. Wow, by overestimating him for a worthless achievement, we really lost all credibility.

<center><youtube>qq01I8UzaHE</youtube></center>
{{Quote|They had no idea I was that good at shit-talking live, in-the-moment|Goronchev has mad skills.}}

Some interesting tidbits from this video include:

*Goronchev has the ability to read [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]].
*The only thing smaller than a Jew's penis is a negro's "To Do" list.
*[[Jews did WTC]].
*Someone whose primary source of income is performing menial chores around the house has time too [[Bullshit|precious to waste on ED]].
*Even the intellectually superior can sometimes miss the point.
*His head resembles a 6 foot penis.
*Goronchev made ED even funnier.
[[TL;DR]]: Smugfag needs to learn [[English]], [[satire]], and the basics of a [[wiki]].

We responded by putting on a rubber glove and with a flick of our dick, Goronchev was suspended. He grew up in a suburban neighborhood, though, so he was tough like Mitt Romney and returned as MrThreePercent, (in honor of his penis size, which is [[At least 100|97%]] smaller than average). He began to make [[moar]] videos about the imaginary groups of [[In beta|beautiful]] "women" taking trans-continental road trips to rendezvous with his flesh balloon. Shortly afterwards, Goronchev disappeared from the internet and his account, "MrThreePercent," was suspended due to [[copyright infringement]].

At this time, Smugfag's favorite phrase, "Intellectual Checkmate" became a [[meme|mini-meme]] on /b/. Assuming that "Intellectual Checkmate" means something along the lines of using your wit during a debate to back your opponent into a corner from which they cannot retaliate, he does just the opposite by backing himself into a corner from which he cannot escape, so he disables comments on his videos in the hope that he will never actually have to debate with anyone. His logic would be [[Codey Porter|air tight]], were it not for the inconvenience that other humans happen to have the ability to respond.

When every other video site doesn't work out for you and your support and views have dwindled to nothing, what do you do? That's right! [[You]] make your ''very own'' website! Actually, you have a friend make your very own website. Actually, you have your friend make a channel for your very own website. Actually, you have your friend create a channel with your name on it for a corporate website and call it yours. FUCK YES! And when Brett Keane's channel goes down because the science he doesn't quite have the knowledge for didn't do the work for him, you make like Abraham Lincoln and [[Epic Fail|you try again]].

===The Final Goodbye===
After claiming in his last ED video that he wasn't going to make a new video on ED because they are not worth his time, he suffered the consequences of a mammy naively trying to sustain a diet and gave into the temptation with a seven minute video absolutely DESTROYING ED once again. He knows he's got top game, since he doesn't have any psychological disorders that his <s>mother</s> (lol dead), dad has let on about. To celebrate himself, he went to a print shop with his lucky baseball cap and asked the Mexican behind the counter if he could take a stupid pseudonym like "Goronchev" and make it look cool. The Mexican winked at him and put in red italics the coolest thing- the name of his YouTube account.

Goronchev, having been beaten into oblivion, saw his bleeding as a sure sign of triumph and marched away from YouTube, with his head held high and his thumb up his anus. The only contact he had with us was when Encyclopedia Dramatica was [[baleeted]] in mid-2011, he praised the vile actions of [[Girlvinyl|Sherrod DeHippo]] and her horrid third trimester abortion of a website [[Ohinternet]]. It seems he was hoping that this article would be gone forever. However, he failed to realize that on the internet, nothing ever goes away.

Today, Goronchev continues to make videos of himself flexing his sphincter in his father's basement while talking shit about people in chat rooms with his only friends... which he's never met face-to-face. Though he says he no longer bothers with h8ers like Anonymous and Encyclopedia Dramatica, whenever a [[troll]] shows up at his doorstep he takes time out of his day to make fun of them by writing up a [[TL;DR]] "exposé" on his "victim." This generally revolves around teasing somebody for being of a different race, or else emailing their parents, asking them to stop. He has even gone as far as [http://goronchev.blogspot.com/2010/07/k-thor-jensen-plagiarist-hack-writer.html making fun of a comedy writer by posting pictures of his kids and calling them "deformed,"] thus cementing Smugfag's status as an petulant, balding manbaby douchebag.

Smugfag met his nemesis in Benos, another stay-at-home manbaby with terminal Asperger's. Yes, the person he marked as his equal is, quite appropriately, somebody who can't even function in a social setting. When most others are busy raising families and living responsible, independent lives, Goronchev focuses upon challenging autistic live-with-parent men online, to prove that he is the best Goronchev in a world of Goronchevs. As the story goes, Benos couldn't stand Goronchev from the moment he laid eyes on him and felt the greatest frustration since the time that one kid with cerebral palsy spilled his juice box. So, Goronchev the Cancer Survivor put his lucky red cap on, while Benos the Aspie-Lord put on his goggles and the two fought a war of calling the other one the bigger idiot, neither realizing at any point in the debacle that [[Truth|they are both massive retards]]. Goronchev, knowing that the most-fulfilling [[victory|game]] involves desperate measures, contacted Benos' dad and cried about how much Benos had hurt his feelings. When Benos' dad told his son to behave to no avail, Goronchev did what any mature adult would do and contacted [[Fox_News|Australian news media]], which of course is a lie. Or anyone willing to be goronchev's slave because the lazy faggot couldn't do it himself , and [[X is not your personal army]]. Obviously Goronchev believes he wants people call up Benos' dad, which will fail, because no one really cares. Smugfag also called Benos an [[racist|Australian Arab]] on video because he doesn't understand people's accents or race, and everything went quiet for awhile, but overall, Goronchev remains a cunt. The irony of it all: [[faggot|he watched and recorded an entire video of a man jacking off]], without realizing watching a solo jack off session is [[gay]].

==[[not gay|Not Gay]]==
[[Image:Smugdyke mtf.jpg|thumb|His <strike>girl</strike>boyfriend.]]
[[Image:Mated.jpg|thumb|Totally . . .]]

Goronchev is very, ''very'' insecure about his sexuality. Goronchev is [[Denial|so adamant about his supposed heterosexuality]] that he often pulls wild and "true" sex stories out of his asshole to make himself sound straight. In most cases, the sex stories are so generic that it is very obvious they were ripped straight from a [[porn]] scene. In other cases, the stories are so vague that all instances of "she" and "her" can easily be replaced with "he" and "him" and it wouldn't make a difference.

{{Quote|[[Lies|I LOVE '''VAGINA & BREASTS]]''', and I'm straighter than a laser ([[Unwarranted Self-Importance|Hopefully, that will reduce the number of gay perverts after me]])|Methinks Goronchev doth protest too much}}

Smugfag apparently has a [[girlfriend]], and states that according to HOTorNOT, she is a perfect ten.

On February 27th, 2008 at approximately 10:15 PM EST, Goronchev was spotted in the CAM or GTFO chatroom of Stickam.com. At this time, he openly made a challenge towards a female member concerning his superiority over females in giving oral stimulation of the penis. This proved to be a landmark achievement in Goronchev's quest in proving that he is not gay.
{{quote|My dick is actually just long enough for me to get my tongue on it without too much effort|Smugfag, remarking on his favorite activity.}}

Also note that one of his favorite music stars is [[Gwen Stefani]], a homewrecking gutter slut and common love of all [[gay|straight]] white males across the globe.

==Smugfacts==
[[Image:SITEZ.png|thumb|Uhhh...wow...yeah...]]
*Fitter than the entire US Marine Corps.
*[[Bukkake|Beat up thirty guys at the same time]].
*Obtained offers of [[prostitute|employment]] from YouTube
*Intellectually checkmated ED.
*Had sex... like, more than once.
*Possesses a "larger than average penis". Seriously.
*Had repugnant sex with BigGayAl, his #1 internet-lover.
*Had a [[girlfriend]] instead of his hand, rumors still persist this is his [[faghag]]. [http://archive.fo/JrTWm]
*Transmogrified into [[Picard|Mr. Clean]] with steroid enhanced features [http://www.stickam.com/viewMedia.do?mId=191388327]
*Metaphorically provided homosexuals with a dicking so deep that he was able to hook ''their'' cocks and draw them out through their annihilated rectums before then lovingly holding them aloft and licking off the cum. *See far top of his Blogspot for a normal version*
*Watched a man fap on cam [[LOL WUT|to prove he isn't gay]].
*Cheated on a girl named Lesli after he slept with another [[trap|girl]] to prove he's less of an [[asshole]] and in denial about facts like a true faggot on the [[internets]] but proved nothing in a video he made about [[retard|Benos]] when backing up [[lol|evidence]].
*Goronchev with his best American accent, pronounces [[Aspergers]] as [[Stupid|Oss-pergers]] making Benos look less retarded.
*Was on K Thor Jensen's internet losers of the week [http://archive.fo/jIpmJ]

== Myths About Goronchev ==

'''Myth: "Goronchev doesn't work for his parents"'''

'''FALSE.''' Goronchev does, in fact, live in his father's basement. He and his father often videotape themselves having incestuous relations, with Goronchev taking his father's creamy load in his ass and then playing the rusty trombone.

 

'''Myth: "Goronchev has had sex with many women."'''

'''FALSE.''' Goronchev is too infected with teh gay to be attracted to vagina. He has tried, however, to have sex with men, though most gay men are smart enough to stay away.

 

'''Myth: "Goronchev is not a pedophile."'''

'''FALSE.''' We have the pictures, videos, and eye witness testimonies to prove it. Click [http://goronchev.on.nimp.org/ here] to see it.

 

'''Myth: "Goronchev is as healthy as a horse."'''

'''FALSE.''' It is a widely-known fact that Goronchev has superAIDS, and will likely die in a matter of months.

 

'''Myth: "Goronchev's penis is 8 and 3/4 inches long."'''

'''FALSE.''' Goronchev said himself that his penis reaches from A to Z on a QWERTY keyboard, meaning his penis is approximately one centimeter long.

 

'''Myth: [[George Bush doesn't care about black people|"Goronchev cares about black people"]] '''

'''FALSE,''' as proven by the below quote by Goronchev himself:

{{squote|A half ape, half human creature devolved from chimpanzees, who eats fried chicken, watermelon, and collared greens, write songs about raping white woman and stealing welfare checks from grandmothers...Niggers are lazy, dumb, and worst of all smell after taking a shower...Jews are a subhuman species...Jews did the World Trade Center attacks...I have no penis|Smugfag}}

 

'''Myth: "Goronchev can fight two guys at once."'''

'''SOMEWHAT TRUE,''' assuming that "fighting" means "double anal secksing."

 

'''Myth: "Goronchev is a compulsive liar.'''"

'''TRUE.''' One look at his actions and facial expressions in his videos and you can easily tell that he is lying out of his ass.

 

'''Myth: "Goronchev is cool."'''

'''HAHAHAHAHAHA NO'''

 

'''Myth: "People watch his videos."'''

'''FALSE.''' Goronchev is the only one who takes himself seriously, and thus he thinks people actually like him and watch his videos.

==Psychological Analysis==

The following is a detailed psychological analysis by acclaimed e-psychologist Dr. David Anonymous, PhD:

{{squote|From an entirely psychological standpoint, all of his arguments just go to show how intellectually and physically inferior he feels to other people, as demonstrated by his need to go out of his way to try to outperform the "best" he can find at everything.

"I want to feel good about my body. Who is the strongest guy I can outperform?"
USMC Recruits.

"I didn't say I could outperform the entire USMC. I just went to the USMC recruiting station and did 26 pull-ups; more than any of them could do." Not that he had any intention of actually *joining* the USMC, just needed to reassure himself that he was physically superior than everyone around him. As a note... Recruits? "Recruit" is military terminology for "a civilian who will soon be joining the military." I.E. He beat a bunch of guys straight off the street, who had not been to Boot Camp yet. They were likely fresh out of HS.

To address his need to defend his phallic aptitudes: when you defend your PENIS by citing a statistic, it just shows how insecure you are about it. Yes, every guy gets insecure about how long or thick his PENIS is at least once. Totally normal. But to say, "My PENIS is ABOVE average" is just stating that either:

1. I believe everything my girlfriend says to me. 
2. I looked up average PENIS size on the internet and compared mine to it. 
3. I stood in the men's restroom and checked out people's dicks.

I admit to doing #2- mostly because I know you can't place much faith in #1, and #3 will get you beaten up. If 4.25" is 'average', then 'above average' is anything above 4.25. Even 4.26. Whoopty-fucking-doo. Congratulations, smugfag.

Furthermore, his need to go out of his way to put everyone he meets into "intellectual checkmate" just further demonstrates his intellectual inferiority complex.|Dr. David Anonymous, PhD}}

==Smugfag and the [[Old Media]]==
[[Image:Smugcapmaybe.JPG|thumb|IRREFUTABLE PROOF...more or less...that Goronchev WAS ALREADY A FAUX NEWS DARLING]]
Goronchev made an appearance on [[Faux News]] to [[Leave me alone|discuss]] [[Megan Meier|cyber-bullying]] and [[Anonymous]]. He is now an "[[liar|expert]]" on cyberbullying. Smugfag gets about 9 seconds worth of face-time. He earlier promoted his television premiere on his [[Jewtube]] and suggested that [[unwarranted self importance|perhaps the Fox people would post the rest of his interview on the website]].

Just remember, kids: [[bulling is rabbit]] on the internets.

In one of his videos bragging about this [[fag|incredible feat]], he claims that he was "chosen" do an interview, despite the fact that Fox asks people to call in to be screened for these interviews.

<center><youtube>PNfVhoKVx7Q</youtube></center>
{{Quote|These people are extremely organized...|Goronchev, referring to this page written by a 16-year-old on the shitter.}}

Though this appears to be Smugfag's first news appearance, it might be possible that he has appeared on Fox before. You be the judge:

1) Watch the smash-hit of summer 2007, "Anon vs. Faux News" again [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DNO6G4ApJQY]

2) Pay particular attention to the [[fag|leet haXXor]] in silhouette at 1:45, 1:57 ("they get what they call 'lulz'...") and 3:02

3) NOTICE BASEBALL CAP AND COLLARED SHIRT - official uniform of the International Association of Smugfags, as shown in his armada of motherfucking YouTube videos.

4)<s> Watch the 2008 cult classic "Brett Keane interviews Goronchev" (only the first 30 seconds, it's a fucking epic a la Battlefield Earth otherwise) [http://youtube.com/watch?v=WAVMmfPo_NM]</s> baleeted

5) Note this delicious nugget of dialogue:

*'''SMUGFAG:''' Rupert Murdoch is all over this sweet, young, tight ass, yes indeed.
*'''BURGER KEANE:''' So what exactly is the Fox News going to be doing with you, bro?
*'''SMUGFAG:''' Yeah, well here's the deal: '''we already did a thing'''. You may not know this, but...

In conclusion - it's him. Amirite or amirite?

== Videos ==

<center>{{fv|meenvids1|background-color: lightgray;|font-weight: bold;

|<youtube>2jRlcqn7M74</youtube>
Goronchev is Moar Racist.
|<youtube>cSGJo3CFLKQ</youtube>
He is bothered by hypocrisy while at the same time practicing it; he has only one option, BUT IT DOESN'T END THERE. Goronchev haet hypocrisy even moar:
|<youtube>-1595TOu_So</youtube>
He's a sicko. 
|<youtube>qOb8cyE4a0A</youtube>
Smugfag returns for more hate and trolling on [[youtube|internet peoples]]; doesn't realize,
he's being [[rape|used like the condom himself]], so other users can get more [[popular|whoring]],
please thank goronchev for his [[Boring|TL;DR]] videos
|<youtube>kWSP5TVBIQI</youtube>
Smugfag critical of anti scifag [[hate]](Commentary)
|<youtube>6-AzSCCJR_s</youtube>
Chris Crocker talks to smugfag on the phone.
|<youtube>sE0YNmgGnf4</youtube>
Smugfag tries to prove he's got a high [[IQ]] in [[no|intelligence]], but prank calls like he's an
[[13_year_old_boy]]
|<youtube>zG9xn1TLLQ8</youtube>
The [[irony]] of this video is that he wacked off to porn(though faked), but tried to expose
benos for jerking off on cam.
|<youtube>qRg7dZMNwbU</youtube>
Major butthurt when Goronchev gets flagged on youtube.
Goronchev is interviewed by The Burger Keane
|<youtube>a5qAJtZaacc</youtube>
LOL
}}



</center>

== Gallery ==

{{cg|Gallery of Intellect|intelgallery|center|<gallery>
Image:ICchess.jpg|Intellectual Checkmate is now a meme.
Image:Gaysha.JPG|
Image:Gaysha2.JPG|HOLY SHIT! IT IS!
Image:360goronchevclose2.jpg|[[360 kid|The great thing about Intellectual Checkmate isn't destroying ED, it's showing everyone on YouTube that I did.]]
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:Goronchev.jpg|@Smugfag...[[INTERNET HATE MACHINE|you have our attention.]]
Image:YES!POPULAR!.jpg|SNIGGITY SNAP
Image:Goronchev.png|
Image:Bald.png|Fgt is losing his hair lol.
Image:Combover.jpg|[[bald|FOLLICLY CHECKMATED!]]
Image:Smugness.jpg|[[Otaku|Dressed like a geisha]] (Moar liek GAY-sha, [[amirite|amirite]]?)
Image:34 on smugfag.jpg|[[34]] on Smugfag
Image:goronchev_victim.jpg|[[Victim complex|VICTIM]]
Image:SmugfagGF.jpg|[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n5GLbkKEzT8 Smugdyke], Smugfag's [http://www.hotornot.com/r/?eid=SMHRRUK&key=JWV 10/10] MTF "girlfriend"
Image:Smugfag4.jpg|Smugfag: Uses people like a condom.
Image:GoronchevsDick.jpg|[http://goronchev.blogspot.com/2008/01/common-myths-about-me-on-internet-damn.html Goronchev using a dildo to fool people to believing his dick is hueg].
Image:Goronchev straighter than lazer.PNG|Yeah...
Image:Supergay.jpg|Supergay!
Image:Intellectual Faggot.jpg|The losing black piece fits him so well.
Image:SmugfagA ZSCALE.JPG|Hitting on the ladies again with your A-Z scale huh?
Image:Dawguxp5.jpg|Photofunia's version of [[Fail|Smuggod]].
Image:itresembles.jpg|RESEMBLANCE.
Image:Smugfag_adopted.jpg|
Image:Goronchev_wetdream.jpg|Sharing a dream
Image:Smugfag_Claming_Fake_Superority_all_over_again.jpg|Making shitty claims
Image:Smugsleepy.jpg|...Yep, he's straight.
Image:Goronchev BBQ.png|Not shooped.
Image:Weaponsofmasssteroids.jpg|Balding Steroid Abuser ready for action.
Image:Picture_goronchevsuspsended.png|Jewtube finally got the message to him.
Image:Smugfag_douche.JPG|Uses an ear syringe to douche [[santorum]] from his [[micropenis]].
Image:Acatisfinetoogoronchev.jpg|Following the footsteps of [[Kenny Glenn]] his national [[an hero]]. [[A_cat_is_fine_too]]
Image:Goronchev-faggot-demotivational-poster-1211030195.jpg|
Image:Goronchevbaw.png|Smugfag crying over a bodybuilding member trollin him over his dead mum. thread for extra [[lulz]]: old bodybuilding.com site http://tinyurl.com/7mvh8ed link dead
Image:Goronchev_drugs.jpg| What he does before making videos.
Image:Goronchevgayblackguy.png| Being hit on by gay [[black_people|niggers]]. Maybe goronchev wants black people to have some [[cum|vanilla]] after all.
Image:27911556.jpg| Keanu is always right.
Image:Mr3bitchslap-1.jpg| Goronchev has a dirty fetish.
Image:Anewchallengerappears.png| The ultimate [[retard]] battle has begun!
File:Goronchev1.jpg
File:Intellectual Checkmate 3.png
File:360goronchev.jpg
File:Speshul.jpg
File:Durrrr.JPG
File:Smugfag.JPG
File:360goronchevclose.jpg
File:Goronchev lulz.JPG
File:Intellectual Checkmate 2.jpg
File:Intellectual Checkmate.jpg
File: GoronchevracistruinedUntitled.png
</gallery>|0}}

== External Links ==
*[https://archive.ph/juAz Goronchev hater group]
*[https://discord.com/channels/607393960301821965/607821077711683584 Discord]
*[https://www.tiktok.com/@themrbomb When it could be worse while acting smug, he joins this shit site where everyone acts like faggots on camera]
*[https://spacehey.com/profile?id=72575 A account no really would care about anyway]
*[https://www.facebook.com/BrawnyRonnie His new facebook to hide from himself again where he flexes his gay body] [https://www.youtube.com/BrawnyRonnie Youtube new Main same old shit:BrawnyRonnie]
[https://www.facebook.com/people/La-Bomb/100000509592396 His facebook is hidden or baleeted due to the exposing of benos revealing facebook chats that goronchev had with his dad]
*<s>[http://brettkeanevideo.com/view_channel.php?user=GhostGoronchev</s> He now resides in brett keane's rectum] Beat up a guy yet not proven to be [[anonymous]] IRL, but only a lie to think he's bigger then [[4chan]] [[Truth|We know he runs scared if someone pulled a knife at him, he's too busy trying to pwn a possible furry named benos on the interweb that no one really cares about]]</s> '''DEAD'''
*[http://twitter.com/goronchev Goronchev's Twatter] [[twitter|twatter]] that he updates for his stickam and other bullshit. He recently tried to [[butthurt|protect his tweets]], because of benos trolling his ass, yet, [[realistic_expectations|they can be still found by searching his name on the website]].
*[http://tinychat.com/goronchev/ Tell how much you love his tiny penis], beware; this is all lies, as he has none.
*[http://www.myspace.com/goronchev Smugfag's MySpace]
*<s>[http://www.myspace.com/ronlamp Smugfag's OTHER MySpayce]</s> Lol private
*[http://tinychat.com/mrsexbomb Goronchev's Tinycock] After [[Stickam]] decided to [[an_hero]], smugfag had to relocate to a smaller [[tinychat|dick]].
*<s>[http://www.stickam.com/profile/goronchev Smugfag's Stickam]</s> Stickam pwned themselves, now goronchev has to rebuild his e-peen once again.
*<s>[http://www.stickam.com/profile/thezone Smugfag's OTHER Stickam made to hide from anon]</s> Same as above
*<s>[http://www.stickam.com/profile/goronchev_live Smugfag's 3rd Stickam profile made to hide from himself]</s> No more dickam!
*<s>[http://www.youtube.com/user/goronchev Smugfag's YouTube]</s> '''SUSPENDED. FOR THE LULZ. Finally.'''
*<s>[http://youtube.com/user/MrThreePercent Smugfag's OTHER YouTube]</s> Lol suspended
*<s>[http://youtube.com/user/smugfagg Spoof YouTube created by a /b/tard]</s> Suspended
*<s>[http://www.livevideo.com/Goronchev Smugfag's LiveVideo]</s> Dead
*<s>[http://yourvision.magnify.net/ yourvision.magnify.net his failed video site]</s> Failed site dead.
*[http://goronchev.blogspot.com/ Gayspot] [[LOL]] [[Butthurt|Invite only]] because benos' been taking down his failed videos.
*<s>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzvkWNy3OzQ][http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u-KVtA3lJp8][http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQ-OS9lQ7OI] Smugfag declaring war on various chans</s> ZOMG Private? How are we going to stroke your e-peen now???
*[http://www.myfoxla.com/myfox/pages/Home/Detail;jsessionid=4D800A279B3CEAD006A31E0876588922?contentId=5647826&version=4&locale=EN-US&layoutCode=VSTY&pageId=1.1.1&sflg=1 Smugfag on FOX11 NEWS] He calls himself a [[Lulz|'victim']].
*[http://youtube.com/SubVLPer Another possible socket account with stickam chats. Though, he cannot stick to many accounts already, that faggot]
*http://gorenchev.blogspot.com A satirical blog created by Benos
*[https://www.facebook.com/pages/Goronchev-the-worst-vlogger-who-ever-lived/310607445617221 An anti-Goronchev Facebook group. Join for the lulz!]
*[https://www.youtube.com/user/LaRoathTheGoat Iliketofuckgoats ] Possible socket account with many of goronchev's old vids, just trying to be your [[lame|average]], everyday, [[white_people|white]] guy.
See lulzy background with a obsession with the goronchev and benos drama that still wages on once and awhile.
*[http://www.pornolize.com/translate/?lang=en&url=https://encyclopediadramatica.online/Goronchev Goronchev Pornolized] If you want to see how gay goronchev can get while pornolized.
*<s>[http://facepunch.com/member.php?u=144999 Facepunch account ] Possible account on facepunch/or hoping to troll his number 1 fan Benos by stalking him. There is proof of that in his [[fail|exposing]] video.</s> DEAD

== See Also ==
*[[TheSockDetective]]
*[[MrFetch]]
*[[Unwarranted self-importance]]
*[[Internet tough guy]]
*[[Not Gay]]
*[[Lolcow]]
*[[Asking for it]] (is saying too little)
*[[GreenTeaGirlie]]
*[[Ugly]]
*[[Pedophile]]
*[[Failure]]
*[[Idiot]]
*[[Derek Smart]]

{{Takedown}}
{{ytseries}}
{{chans}}

{{Timeline|Featured article December 14, [[2007]]|[[Penis Nosed Fox]]|Intellectual Checkmate|[[Robert Hawkins]]}}

[[Category:Abnormal_Psych]]
[[Category:Internets Phenomena]]
[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Memes]]
[[Category:Chans]]
[[Category:2007]]

Dexter

2024-11-27T10:44:30Z

Lazarus: /* Season 9 "New Blood" */

{{spoiler|Before Dexter is killed by his own son, his brother is the ice truck killer and Dexter [[pwns]] him. Doakes (bay harbour butcher) and Rita (killed by trinity killer) and Debra and Vogal (killed by brain surgeon) and Lay "best blows" Guerta all fucking die an excruciatingly painful death.
'''Deb finds her urges to [[incest|fuck Dex]] and instead finds out Dex's urges to [[sociopath|kill people]]. Deb kills LaGuerta to save Dex's truth and gets PTSD! Happy New Year! He fakes his death because his [[over 9000|9001th]] girlfriend (Hannah McGay) and son are apparently bound to die because of him.. – becoming a [[shit no one cares about|lumberjack]]. How [[house|original]]. 10 years later his son finds him after mother Hannah dies of cancer for some reason, Dexter then finds his son somehow also has killing urges, and then Dexter gets caught. THE END!!1112'''}}
[[File:Sorry wrong person Dexter.jpg|right|300px]]
[[Image:Dex lab.jpg|thumb|No, not that Dexter]]

'''''Dexter''''' is a TV series (based from book) about a moral [[serial-killer]]/[[sick fuck]] in [[Miami]] named ''Dexter Morgan'', or by friends just ''Dex''. By day he's a forensic [[blood]]-[[squirting|spatter]] analyst who works for the [[pigs|cops]] of Florida. But, much like every [[superhero]] he stalks/vets out and catches criminals, except he ends with [[murder|slaughter]]ing them; by [[aspergers syndrome|aspie]] monologue and thrusting deep into their organs with his long hard blade and inner [[black cock|big black passenger]].

[[File:TV series inspirations.png|thumb|Dexter has inspired many]]

His mother got [[pwnt]] into pieces with a chainsaw in front both him and his older brother Brian, left in a literal pool of blood for days. Causing them to be traumatized for life. However, a [[stereotypical]] policeman, Harry, had guilt's [[trolls remorse|sympathy]] because it was his fault Dexter's mom was murdered, so he adopted him, but left Brian because he was already fucked. And eventually to Harry's dismay Dexter was also one sick fuck!! After Harry commits [[suicide]], Dexter is downcast for approximately 9 seconds. because his reject sister is alive and he has a girlfriend that makes him [[sammich]] and has little children to distract him with and has Long story short, he kills criminals [[For the lulz|because he can]].

==Season storylines==
===Season 1===
[[File:Julie_Benz.jpg|thumb|150px|Dexter's hot girlfriend. [[homosexual|Don't like?]]]]

It all starts with Dexter killing people and trying to find this other serial killer is also a pretty cool guy, talks with fellow [[cops]] (who are mostly [[spics]] because it's Miami.) gets accused of beign a [[sick fuck]] by a [[nigger]] cop, monologues and kills random ass criminals for 20 episodes while trying to fight his homosexuality enough to fuck his girlfriend and [[rape|play with]] her kids.
It turns out his brother is actually the other serial killer and offers Dexter to join him and be killers but Dexter says no and [[pwns]] him, which makes no fucking sense.

===Season 2===
[[File:Lilah-west 480x640.jpg|thumb|[[A challenger appears]].]]

Secret's out and lots of dead bodies are found. A [[party van|FBI]] agent is called in and wants to hit Dexter's sister; Dexter wants the same. This makes our hero very jealous. His girlfriend thinks he's chasing the dragon so she sends him to rehab. In rehab he meets a woman who has da hots for him, but instead of getting it on with her he dumps her, making her stalk him. A black cop finds out Dexter is the bad guy, and tries to stop him, because Dexter realizes he is a sick fuck, he agrees, but the cop is later killed by the crazy stalker ex, who is then killed by Dexter. The black cop gets blamed for the crime, but that's ok since he was a goddamn lazy nigger anyway. Also, the FBI agent, after [[fuck|tapping]] the sister's sweet ass ([[Awesome|who was less than half his age]]), kicks it out into the street.

===Season 3===

Lots of filler, the highlight of the season is when Dexter gets a [[mexican|spic]] sidekick and tries to teach him things, but then the spic starts acting [[retarded]] and so Dexter decides to kill his ass, but the spic tries to kill him back, but then he [[fails]] and is killed like he should have been the moment he illegally entered the country.

===Season 4===
[[File:Oh! The darkness you can dream by DrFaustusAU.png|285px|right]]

Even more filler, also Dexter's baby is demented, and the guy he kills at the end killed his wife, [[lulz]]. The FBI guy returns to tap Deb's ass once more, only to get [[pwned]] in the second episode. [[Nobody cares|The two main spics get married to each other]]. Basically, the main message of this season '[[O rly?|Serial killers shouldn't have children]]'.

===Season 5===
It all gets interesting when a group of men [[rape|raep]] loads of womens, and some [[sick fuck]]s at the FBI watch videos of them being tortured and raped. Dexter also begins to fuck one of the victims, while getting pissed off at some bible bashing babysitter. This series concludes with his sister almost finding him out while not opening up the curtains, because [[anonymous]] used [[hack]] sheets to counter her bitch cop instincts. Oh yeah, and the rape victim bitch leaves Dexter at the end, rendering the whole season completely fucking pointless with the ending scene making him transformed into a smiling assassin.
[[File:LumenReturnsToHerPlanet.gif|center|Lumen returns to her planet.]]

===Season 6===
Some [[christfag]] decides to [[Batshit_insane|recreate doom's day and kills many pplz]] with his professor [[Time_paradox|WHO'S BEEN DEAD BEFORE THE WHOLE SHIT'S EVEN BEGUN]] but gets [[pwnt]]. Meanwhile Dexter meets some [[nigger]] who [[Duh|dies after some episodes]], his sister goes [[emo]].
At the very end his sister finally decides to care and she finds out who [[Sick_fuck|he really is]]. A gimmick for the [[Retards|fans]] to [[Shit_brix|shit their pants]] waiting the next [[Shit|excellent]] season.

===Season 7===
[[File:Got My Eyes On You.gif|thumb|Got mah eyes on you...]]
In an attempt to render Season 6 almost as pointless as Season 5, both the new PD nigger and the [[Otaku|creepy]], [[Computer Science III|Techno-Wizard]] [[newfag]] is unceremoniously killed off by some [[gangster|mobster]] [[ruskie]]s (okay, "[[Shit nobody cares about|The Ukrainian Mafia]]", [[no one|but who the fuck can tell the difference]]?), who's leader, a [[britfag]] [[Trying too hard|giving his best attempt]] at a Russian accent, will apparently be the ineffectual villain of this season. Meanwhile Debra makes a half-hearted attempt to dissuade Dexter from his serial-killing ways, that lasts the whole of one-and-a-half episode. Expect the writers to ramp up the juicy [[incest]] angle and milk it for all it is worth. It also makes her [[cum|wet]] when Dexter tells her he killed [[Cunt|Spetzler]], plus for extra [[lulz]], when he yells [[Fuck]] to troll Spetzler while acting totally [[batshit insane]]. Stay tuned for next week's episode when he crosses with [[britfag]] the terminator and [[bitch|LaGuerta]] as she begins to give a shit about Dexter's habit and we hope she gets shot to death by Debra in the series finale.

Don't forget more [[incest]], it'll keep the [[rednecks]] pleased. Previously, [[England|Issac]] goes apeshit and kills everyone in a bar because he was being [[trolled]] by [[pretty_cool_guy|Dexter]], and ends up in [[prison]], meanwhile him and fugly [[sister]] share a room, but she wasn't totally [[asking for it]] yet. And it was too predictable enough for Debra to burn away the evidence enough for Dexter to keep up his [[sick_fuck|sick fuckery]]. Which would piss off [[bitch|LaGuerta]] because [[nigger|Doakes]] isn't alive to surprise [[motherfuckers]].

Once again, Dexter fucks another blonde named Hannah aka Sarah who properly never regained her memory and become a psycho killer, and because Dexter wants to [[rape]] hot women on the table, which will properly make her [[dead|an hero]] by the end of the season. Nice job. Issac, the fake accent russian mafia boss does nothing of [[Unwarranted Self-Importance]] by killing Colombians for [[lulz]]. Also Debra dates a [[300|Spartan]], some guy who wants to rape Hannah as well, it's pretty much a raping season from here on out. [[lol]] Debra's boytoy for a couple of episodes gets [[pwn|fucked]] by Hannah McKay with poison ivy or some shit, because she properly wants a [[threesome]] with [[Incest|Deb and Dexter]] and was [[jealous]]. Hannah's dad comes by to visit, dies in one episode, because fuck no, Dexter has to ruin his shit and dump him in the ocean. Because he can. The Dark Passenger is fucked, so Dexter can kill everything in his path without consequences, cause [[John Locke]] will join him on his crusade. LaBitch is still on Dexter's ass, hopefully enough for Debra to rape her [[spic]][[nigger]] shitter off the finale. Everything went according to plan, because it scares us terribly we knew this would happen, after the first episode when LaBitch went on a search to clear Doakes' name with the help of a [[oldfag]] (who hilariously insults her every conversation), so Dexter and Deb walk aimlessly though the new year to make us cream for the next season. SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER, Doakes comes back to show us things we already knew that he was onto Dexter. :| Sadly, Dex and Deb didn't fuck.

<center><youtube>4mWRkg4C6ek</youtube> '''[[Batshit_Insane|Lulzy Scene From Season 7]]'''</center>

===Season 8===

The season starts off with Dexter free from killing [[bitch|LaGuerta]], but his sister turned into a [[sick fuck]] and doesn't want to talk him or have [[incest]]. Some guy grabs her ass, which makes Dexter jealous and wasn't alpha male enough. And confronts her slutty ass that he wasn't on top six months earlier. Then we meet some [[oldfag]] named Vogel who doesn't want to be [[raped]] by some invisible surgeon, that reveals she helped Harry create the code to see where the sick fuckery started. Though it's horribly pointless. Then Dexter and Deb go in a "you're lost, no you're lost" [[the game]]. So immature. When Dexter wanted to kill some Mexican faggot, Deb got in the way and shot the fucker dead to show she wants to be like Dexter. To skip through all this shit, [[Swearing|Debra]] [[trolls]] Dexter into driving with him, but they end up [[I_see_what_you_did_there|"swimming deep"]]. The rest of the season is actually them being dead in Purgatory. I'm not kidding. And oh Hannah kidnaps little boys to show how serious she is and heads off to some city you'll never visit. And molests him, the end. But of course, Dexter kills Debra in the end by drowning her carcass into the sea. [[TL;DR]], Dexter ends up living [[forever_alone]], so he can survive do more sick fuckery in the next season that ruins the show even more. To repeat what you thought was a better finale to this shit.

===Season 9 "New Blood"===

Dexter comes back to our screens in a reboot, [[at least 100]] years later, for more emo bloody shit, since he's guilt ridden after pwning his sister. More sick fuckery ensures when new serial killer [[KFC|Clancy Brown]](Yeah, the main villan is a Colonel Sanders lookalike) as goes head to head as the new villian of sick fuckery, because it wasn't enough for Dexter to do what he does, to cause some more [[lulz]]. Except, his dumb ass son comes back to troll him because Hannah, his hot piece of ass step mother who got pwned by [[cancer]] told him to go find his sick fuck father in [[Oregon]] so they can do more sick fuck stuff together, seeing as he's so fucked up like his father. Nonetheless, [[tl;dr]], Dexter and his son flee from the [[police]], after Dexter killed a [[nigger]] that no one gives a shit about when being caught by his bitch girlfriend, Angela. Being the dumbass, Dexter asks his son to pwn him. Harrison is given money by the only bitch cop that doesn't know shit about Harrison also being a [[sick fuck]] to start a new life to continue Dexter's sick fuckery, rendering the entire series, pointless. And yeah, they're making a spinoff about the little shit, can't wait to [[tl;dr]] this article. NOPE, Dexter ressurrects once again in his new series, since they can't let this shit go.

==Memorable quotes==

{{quote|Surprise, Motherfucker!|Doakes (Season 1, Episode 12)}}

{{quote|UhhhhhuhuhhuhhhuhhhhhaaaaaAAHAHAHAHAAAAHHHHHH! HUAHHHHUH!|Dexter (Season 4, Episode 1) [[Retard|Srsly]].}}

{{quote|You Get What You Fucking Deserve.|Dexter (Season 6, Episode 9)}}

===Shitty Fresh Prince Rewrite===
[[File:Dexter killed you.JPG|thumb]]
'''''Humble Beginnings'''''

Now this is the story all about how 
My life got flipped, turned upside down 
An' I'd like to take a minute just sit right there< 
I'll tell you how I became The Bay Harbor Butcher 

[[Casey Anthony|Sanford, Florida born and raised]] 
Killing animals's how I spent most my days 
Chilling out maxing relaxing killing a duck 
Till my dad Harry noticed that i was a sick fuck 
And started teaching me this code of rules 
I killed one little crook and my dad got scared 
And said "oh lawds ima have a big heart attack" 

I whistled for a cab and when it came near 
The license plate said blood and had a knife in the mirror 
If anything, I thought that this cab was [[Awesome|kool]] 
So fuck it, I said, take me to a medical school 

After learning how to cut I realised that 
I should be a cop instead of a [[Doctor|white hat]] 
Looked at my life and realised I was there 
To kill every fucker until [[noone]] was left 

==Gallery==

<center>
<gallery>
File:Dexter blood sugar advice.jpg
File:Dexterpointy.JPG
File:YouTube double ads inventor grave.jpg
File:Dexter and Dee Dee.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

==Videos==

{{videoframe|DexVids|background-color: #FF6666;|font-weight: bold;
|
<youtube>WM5_pac-4Is</youtube>''Dexter in 60 Seconds''
|
<youtube>5vzizY_JLrk</youtube>''Dexter and Brian [[Masturbating]] With [[Swearing|Deb]]''}}

==See also==
*[[Brokeback Mountain]]
*[[Law & Order]]
*[[Sociopath]]
*[[Murder]]
*[[Pretty cool guy]]
*[[Wincest]]
{{Television}}

Intellectual Checkmate

2024-10-05T05:31:36Z

Lazarus: /* The Final Goodbye */

[[Image:AgoronchekVandal.jpg|center]]
[[Image:Moronchev.jpg|thumb|Goronchev, pitifully declaring war against the [[Internet Hate Machine]].]]
[[Image:Gay gon.jpg|thumb|Ladies and gentlemen, meet the [[lol|Sexiest Man in the World]]!]]
[[Image:Check mate.jpg|thumb|Moar liek Intellectually Challenged amirite]]
'''Goronchev''' (AKA Smugfag, MrThreePercent, Ron Lamp, Andy Ross and "Ass Lamp") is a 30-something, balding, closeted [[homosexual]] born in 17 Oct(March 12?), as a cancer survivor without testicles who plays Quasimodo in [[basement-dweller|his parents' basement]] in [[Hollywood]], [[California|CA]] who spends his life combating [[DOX|doc_droppers]] because he is so [[9/11|brave]]. Having lived in his basement his whole life with a lonely, beautiful and ultimately pure terabyte of [[child pornography]] to [[Fap|be his friend]], Goronchev realized that the only way [[TsimFuckis|someone like him]] could survive would be to post [[TL;DW]] videos of himself [[Attention whore|flexing his steroid-induced muscles]] and rubbing his asshole, while pretending to have knowledge of very [[intellectual]] topics such as [[Shit nobody cares about|religion, sex and video games]]. When not posing as the illegitimate, cancer-ridden son of Penn Jillete, he can often be found lurking on sites like [[Stickam]], attempting to bait [[16-year-old girls]] with minimal understanding of the English language and green cards into checking out his [[Bullshit|"above average"]] penis.

[[Some argue|Some would argue]] that he is not only a [[Slavery|keen mind of the West]], but the greatest [[troll]] known to Anon. That is assuming, of course, if "some" constituted an [[Watchmen|abattoir of retarded children]], who also believe the nuts in their shit has the [[Do i have potential|potential]] for homemade Nutella. Take heed, however, as combating this individual online will surely lead to one's demise! Well, at least it might lead to slight embarassment in his erotic chat party, if he's the only one talking. If that hurdle is crossed, then he will just resort to being the ultimate badass by contacting your parents, asking them to tell you to stop. If that doesn't work, then he will use his [[DotA|ultimate]] by contacting your local news media, hoping that "arguing with someone on the internet" is a hideous federal offense in your country.

{{Quote|My penis is so big it reaches from A - Z on the keyboard!|Goronchev, literally stating his penis is about ONE CENTIMETER LONG}}

==The Saga==
===Smugfag Begins===
[[Image:SeriousCat oscar wilde.jpeg|left|thumb|[[Serious Cat]] detects [[serious business]]]]
[[Image:Virtual bitchslap.jpg|thumb|Smugfag is smuuuuuuuuuuug.]]
Goronchev appeared on [[4chan]] in June of 2007 when a video of him was posted on [[B|/b/]] in which he claimed victory over the "misc. section". Paranoid [[Newfag|baby Anonymous]] ceased fapping to [[lolicon]] long enough to gangrape his [[YouTube]] with negative feedback and video responses, all while noisily banging their keyboards to produce spam comments (Consisting of [[DESU|DESU DESU DESU]] in natural /b/tard fashion). As things turned out, he was actually attacking the Misc. section at bodybuilding.com. Goronchev's attack on the Misc. section described his "intellectual checkmate" of Misc. by, as he put it, "using them like a condom." /b/ was slow to realize that they were not his target and [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tpSQmfBhUAg initially believed this was an insult], albeit a hilariously inept one. Even after the mistake was discovered, the attacks continued as his smugness made him an instant hit with /b/tards, who enjoyed making fun of his balding head, Minnie Mouse voice, and ridiculous claims about his [[Lie|sex life]] and intellectual prowess.

Trolls and rubberneckers at the time were delighted over Goronchev's [[Narcissism|obsession with his body]]. Of course, Goronchev was so concerned about maintaining his 3% body fat that he completely forgot about his round, balding head. Goronchev continued to feed the flames by claiming that his penis was [[LOL|almost nine inches long]] but not showing it off to prove his point. To this day Goronchev continues to make spurious claims about his member, though it is obvious to anyone with half a brain that this man is more full of shit than [[Tubgirl]].
[[Image:Retractedmicrowang.jpg|thumb|Actual photo of Goronchev's penis.]]
A [[YouTube]] user named Kbob08 used to plague Goronchev with video responses. Almost all of Kbob's videos were video responses to [[Faggot|Goronchev]] with the exception of his very first video which was just a [[retarded]] loogie of [[fail]] where he showed his bad taste in [[games]]. One day, feeling daring, Kbob decided to [[flame]] Goronchev using a video response. This prompted Goronchev to [[man the harpoons]] and end their relationship. Goronchev thoroughly "skewered and exposed" Kbob in a [[LOL WUT|video response to a video response for his video]]. Kbob deleted all Goronchev-related videos when TwinsanityNtranced was bashing on Kbob about being an attention leech. This victory by Goronchev only served to increase his already inflated ego and [[HUEG]] sense of [[unwarranted self-importance]]. He hired a [[Prostitute|publicist]], contacted Faux News, telling them that a new sensation was in town, who was sure to be just as funny as Jay Leno and started referring to his YouTube account as a television show.

===Operation: Intellectual Checkmate===
After a few months of inactivity, he returned in October of 2007. With a titanic ego and infinitesimal dick, he shed a tear of shame and admiration when he read this page. He then gathered himself together, mustered [[Cum|courage]] into his [[Cock|veins]] and declared war upon ED, posting a video in which he later admitted [[My mom just died|his mother is dead]]. "This was most likely suicide caused by the realization that she had given birth to such a grotesque creature instead of letting the doctor [[falcon punch]] her when he revealed that the baby might have a hazardous amount of smug cells," Dr. Anonymous states.

In a truly pathetic testament, Goronchev felt that his domination over ED was the greatest rape he was involved with since that one special time his dad needed help in the basement. For thirteen minutes, Goronchev read quotes from various ED articles that he felt were racist towards black people- as if this were something new. Going down the list of facts about him, he denied the claims to a minimal extent by adjusting minute details that he felt made the claims invalid. Of these claims, the one that he helt most offended by was that he attended a community college in Northern California, as he had never attended college and he never made it farther North than his dad's penis. Wow, by overestimating him for a worthless achievement, we really lost all credibility.

<center><youtube>qq01I8UzaHE</youtube></center>
{{Quote|They had no idea I was that good at shit-talking live, in-the-moment|Goronchev has mad skills.}}

Some interesting tidbits from this video include:

*Goronchev has the ability to read [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]].
*The only thing smaller than a Jew's penis is a negro's "To Do" list.
*The only thing on a [[negro]]'s "To Do" list is a Jew's small penis.
*[[Jews did WTC]].
*Someone whose primary source of income is performing menial chores around the house has time too [[Bullshit|precious to waste on ED]].
*Even the intellectually superior can sometimes miss the point.
*His head resembles a 6 foot penis.
*Goronchev made ED even funnier.
[[TL;DR]]: Smugfag needs to learn [[English]], [[satire]], and the basics of a [[wiki]].

We responded by putting on a rubber glove and with a flick of our dick, Goronchev was suspended. He grew up in a suburban neighborhood, though, so he was tough like Mitt Romney and returned as MrThreePercent, (in honor of his penis size, which is [[At least 100|97%]] smaller than average). He began to make [[moar]] videos about the imaginary groups of [[In beta|beautiful]] "women" taking trans-continental road trips to rendezvous with his flesh balloon. Shortly afterwards, Goronchev disappeared from the internet and his account, "MrThreePercent," was suspended due to [[copyright infringement]].

At this time, Smugfag's favorite phrase, "Intellectual Checkmate" became a [[meme|mini-meme]] on /b/. Assuming that "Intellectual Checkmate" means something along the lines of using your wit during a debate to back your opponent into a corner from which they cannot retaliate, he does just the opposite by backing himself into a corner from which he cannot escape, so he disables comments on his videos in the hope that he will never actually have to debate with anyone. His logic would be [[Codey Porter|air tight]], were it not for the inconvenience that other humans happen to have the ability to respond.

When every other video site doesn't work out for you and your support and views have dwindled to nothing, what do you do? That's right! [[You]] make your ''very own'' website! Actually, you have a friend make your very own website. Actually, you have your friend make a channel for your very own website. Actually, you have your friend create a channel with your name on it for a corporate website and call it yours. FUCK YES! And when Brett Keane's channel goes down because the science he doesn't quite have the knowledge for didn't do the work for him, you make like Abraham Lincoln and [[Epic Fail|you try again]].

===The Final Goodbye===
After claiming in his last ED video that he wasn't going to make a new video on ED because they are not worth his time, he suffered the consequences of a mammy naively trying to sustain a diet and gave into the temptation with a seven minute video absolutely DESTROYING ED once again. He knows he's got top game, since he doesn't have any psychological disorders that his <s>mother</s> (lol dead), dad has let on about. To celebrate himself, he went to a print shop with his lucky baseball cap and asked the Mexican behind the counter if he could take a stupid pseudonym like "Goronchev" and make it look cool. The Mexican winked at him and put in red italics the coolest thing- the name of his YouTube account.

Goronchev, having been beaten into oblivion, saw his bleeding as a sure sign of triumph and marched away from YouTube, with his head held high and his thumb up his anus. The only contact he had with us was when Encyclopedia Dramatica was [[baleeted]] in mid-2011, he praised the vile actions of [[Girlvinyl|Sherrod DeHippo]] and her horrid third trimester abortion of a website [[Ohinternet]]. It seems he was hoping that this article would be gone forever. However, he failed to realize that on the internet, nothing ever goes away.

Today, Goronchev continues to make videos of himself flexing his sphincter in his father's basement while talking shit about people in chat rooms with his only friends... which he's never met face-to-face. Though he says he no longer bothers with h8ers like Anonymous and Encyclopedia Dramatica, whenever a [[troll]] shows up at his doorstep he takes time out of his day to make fun of them by writing up a [[TL;DR]] "exposé" on his "victim." This generally revolves around teasing somebody for being of a different race, or else emailing their parents, asking them to stop. He has even gone as far as [http://goronchev.blogspot.com/2010/07/k-thor-jensen-plagiarist-hack-writer.html making fun of a comedy writer by posting pictures of his kids and calling them "deformed,"] thus cementing Smugfag's status as an petulant, balding manbaby douchebag.

Smugfag met his nemesis in Benos, another stay-at-home manbaby with terminal Asperger's. Yes, the person he marked as his equal is, quite appropriately, somebody who can't even function in a social setting. When most others are busy raising families and living responsible, independent lives, Goronchev focuses upon challenging autistic live-with-parent men online, to prove that he is the best Goronchev in a world of Goronchevs. As the story goes, Benos couldn't stand Goronchev from the moment he laid eyes on him and felt the greatest frustration since the time that one kid with cerebral palsy spilled his juice box. So, Goronchev the Cancer Survivor put his lucky red cap on, while Benos the Aspie-Lord put on his goggles and the two fought a war of calling the other one the bigger idiot, neither realizing at any point in the debacle that [[Truth|they are both massive retards]]. Goronchev, knowing that the most-fulfilling [[victory|game]] involves desperate measures, contacted Benos' dad and cried about how much Benos had hurt his feelings. When Benos' dad told his son to behave to no avail, Goronchev did what any mature adult would do and contacted [[Fox_News|Australian news media]], which of course is a lie. Or anyone willing to be goronchev's slave because the lazy faggot couldn't do it himself , and [[X is not your personal army]]. Obviously Goronchev believes he wants people call up Benos' dad, which will fail, because no one really cares. Smugfag also called Benos an [[racist|Australian Arab]] on video because he doesn't understand people's accents or race, and everything went quiet for awhile, but overall, Goronchev remains a cunt. The irony of it all: [[faggot|he watched and recorded an entire video of a man jacking off]], without realizing watching a solo jack off session is [[gay]].

==[[not gay|Not Gay]]==
[[Image:Smugdyke mtf.jpg|thumb|His <strike>girl</strike>boyfriend.]]
[[Image:Mated.jpg|thumb|Totally . . .]]

Goronchev is very, ''very'' insecure about his sexuality. Goronchev is [[Denial|so adamant about his supposed heterosexuality]] that he often pulls wild and "true" sex stories out of his asshole to make himself sound straight. In most cases, the sex stories are so generic that it is very obvious they were ripped straight from a [[porn]] scene. In other cases, the stories are so vague that all instances of "she" and "her" can easily be replaced with "he" and "him" and it wouldn't make a difference.

{{Quote|[[Lies|I LOVE '''VAGINA & BREASTS]]''', and I'm straighter than a laser ([[Unwarranted Self-Importance|Hopefully, that will reduce the number of gay perverts after me]])|Methinks Goronchev doth protest too much}}

Smugfag apparently has a [[girlfriend]], and states that according to HOTorNOT, she is a perfect ten.

On February 27th, 2008 at approximately 10:15 PM EST, Goronchev was spotted in the CAM or GTFO chatroom of Stickam.com. At this time, he openly made a challenge towards a female member concerning his superiority over females in giving oral stimulation of the penis. This proved to be a landmark achievement in Goronchev's quest in proving that he is not gay.
{{quote|My dick is actually just long enough for me to get my tongue on it without too much effort|Smugfag, remarking on his favorite activity.}}

Also note that one of his favorite music stars is [[Gwen Stefani]], a homewrecking gutter slut and common love of all [[gay|straight]] white males across the globe.

==Smugfacts==
[[Image:SITEZ.png|thumb|Uhhh...wow...yeah...]]
*Fitter than the entire US Marine Corps.
*[[Bukkake|Beat up thirty guys at the same time]].
*Obtained offers of [[prostitute|employment]] from YouTube
*Intellectually checkmated ED.
*Had sex... like, more than once.
*Possesses a "larger than average penis". Seriously.
*Had repugnant sex with BigGayAl, his #1 internet-lover.
*Had a [[girlfriend]] instead of his hand, rumors still persist this is his [[faghag]]. [http://archive.fo/JrTWm]
*Transmogrified into [[Picard|Mr. Clean]] with steroid enhanced features [http://www.stickam.com/viewMedia.do?mId=191388327]
*Metaphorically provided homosexuals with a dicking so deep that he was able to hook ''their'' cocks and draw them out through their annihilated rectums before then lovingly holding them aloft and licking off the cum. *See far top of his Blogspot for a normal version*
*Watched a man fap on cam [[LOL WUT|to prove he isn't gay]].
*Cheated on a girl named Lesli after he slept with another [[trap|girl]] to prove he's less of an [[asshole]] and in denial about facts like a true faggot on the [[internets]] but proved nothing in a video he made about [[retard|Benos]] when backing up [[lol|evidence]].
*Goronchev with his best American accent, pronounces [[Aspergers]] as [[Stupid|Oss-pergers]] making Benos look less retarded.
*Was on K Thor Jensen's internet losers of the week [http://archive.fo/jIpmJ]

== Myths About Goronchev ==

'''Myth: "Goronchev doesn't work for his parents"'''

'''FALSE.''' Goronchev does, in fact, live in his father's basement. He and his father often videotape themselves having incestuous relations, with Goronchev taking his father's creamy load in his ass and then playing the rusty trombone.

 

'''Myth: "Goronchev has had sex with many women."'''

'''FALSE.''' Goronchev is too infected with teh gay to be attracted to vagina. He has tried, however, to have sex with men, though most gay men are smart enough to stay away.

 

'''Myth: "Goronchev is not a pedophile."'''

'''FALSE.''' We have the pictures, videos, and eye witness testimonies to prove it. Click [http://goronchev.on.nimp.org/ here] to see it.

 

'''Myth: "Goronchev is as healthy as a horse."'''

'''FALSE.''' It is a widely-known fact that Goronchev has superAIDS, and will likely die in a matter of months.

 

'''Myth: "Goronchev's penis is 8 and 3/4 inches long."'''

'''FALSE.''' Goronchev said himself that his penis reaches from A to Z on a QWERTY keyboard, meaning his penis is approximately one centimeter long.

 

'''Myth: [[George Bush doesn't care about black people|"Goronchev cares about black people"]] '''

'''FALSE,''' as proven by the below quote by Goronchev himself:

{{squote|A half ape, half human creature devolved from chimpanzees, who eats fried chicken, watermelon, and collared greens, write songs about raping white woman and stealing welfare checks from grandmothers...Niggers are lazy, dumb, and worst of all smell after taking a shower...Jews are a subhuman species...Jews did the World Trade Center attacks...I have no penis|Smugfag}}

 

'''Myth: "Goronchev can fight two guys at once."'''

'''SOMEWHAT TRUE,''' assuming that "fighting" means "double anal secksing."

 

'''Myth: "Goronchev is a compulsive liar.'''"

'''TRUE.''' One look at his actions and facial expressions in his videos and you can easily tell that he is lying out of his ass.

 

'''Myth: "Goronchev is cool."'''

'''HAHAHAHAHAHA NO'''

 

'''Myth: "People watch his videos."'''

'''FALSE.''' Goronchev is the only one who takes himself seriously, and thus he thinks people actually like him and watch his videos.

==Psychological Analysis==

The following is a detailed psychological analysis by acclaimed e-psychologist Dr. David Anonymous, PhD:

{{squote|From an entirely psychological standpoint, all of his arguments just go to show how intellectually and physically inferior he feels to other people, as demonstrated by his need to go out of his way to try to outperform the "best" he can find at everything.

"I want to feel good about my body. Who is the strongest guy I can outperform?"
USMC Recruits.

"I didn't say I could outperform the entire USMC. I just went to the USMC recruiting station and did 26 pull-ups; more than any of them could do." Not that he had any intention of actually *joining* the USMC, just needed to reassure himself that he was physically superior than everyone around him. As a note... Recruits? "Recruit" is military terminology for "a civilian who will soon be joining the military." I.E. He beat a bunch of guys straight off the street, who had not been to Boot Camp yet. They were likely fresh out of HS.

To address his need to defend his phallic aptitudes: when you defend your PENIS by citing a statistic, it just shows how insecure you are about it. Yes, every guy gets insecure about how long or thick his PENIS is at least once. Totally normal. But to say, "My PENIS is ABOVE average" is just stating that either:

1. I believe everything my girlfriend says to me. 
2. I looked up average PENIS size on the internet and compared mine to it. 
3. I stood in the men's restroom and checked out people's dicks.

I admit to doing #2- mostly because I know you can't place much faith in #1, and #3 will get you beaten up. If 4.25" is 'average', then 'above average' is anything above 4.25. Even 4.26. Whoopty-fucking-doo. Congratulations, smugfag.

On one further note; you said, and I quote, "just because you perhaps can't get laid in a Tijuana whorehouse doesn't mean it's that way for all of us." Now, what the fuck? Does this statement provide that fallingcryss, MagicalSexZebra, ae16weirdo and the rest of those beasty bitches were found in Tijuana whorehouses?

Furthermore, his need to go out of his way to put everyone he meets into "intellectual checkmate" just further demonstrates his intellectual inferiority complex.|Dr. David Anonymous, PhD}}

==Smugfag and the [[Old Media]]==
[[Image:Smugcapmaybe.JPG|thumb|IRREFUTABLE PROOF...more or less...that Goronchev WAS ALREADY A FAUX NEWS DARLING]]
Goronchev made an appearance on [[Faux News]] to [[Leave me alone|discuss]] [[Megan Meier|cyber-bullying]] and [[Anonymous]]. He is now an "[[liar|expert]]" on cyberbullying. Smugfag gets about 9 seconds worth of face-time. He earlier promoted his television premiere on his [[Jewtube]] and suggested that [[unwarranted self importance|perhaps the Fox people would post the rest of his interview on the website]].

Just remember, kids: [[bulling is rabbit]] on the internets.

In one of his videos bragging about this [[fag|incredible feat]], he claims that he was "chosen" do an interview, despite the fact that Fox asks people to call in to be screened for these interviews.

<center><youtube>PNfVhoKVx7Q</youtube></center>

Though this appears to be Smugfag's first news appearance, it might be possible that he has appeared on Fox before. You be the judge:

1) Watch the smash-hit of summer 2007, "Anon vs. Faux News" again [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DNO6G4ApJQY]

2) Pay particular attention to the [[fag|leet haXXor]] in silhouette at 1:45, 1:57 ("they get what they call 'lulz'...") and 3:02

3) NOTICE BASEBALL CAP AND COLLARED SHIRT - official uniform of the International Association of Smugfags, as shown in his armada of motherfucking YouTube videos.

4)<s> Watch the 2008 cult classic "Brett Keane interviews Goronchev" (only the first 30 seconds, it's a fucking epic a la Battlefield Earth otherwise) [http://youtube.com/watch?v=WAVMmfPo_NM]</s> baleeted

5) Note this delicious nugget of dialogue:

*'''SMUGFAG:''' Rupert Murdoch is all over this sweet, young, tight ass, yes indeed.
*'''BURGER KEANE:''' So what exactly is the Fox News going to be doing with you, bro?
*'''SMUGFAG:''' Yeah, well here's the deal: '''we already did a thing'''. You may not know this, but...

In conclusion - it's him. Amirite or amirite?

== Videos ==

<center>{{fv|meenvids1|background-color: lightgray;|font-weight: bold;

|<youtube>2jRlcqn7M74</youtube>
Goronchev is Moar Racist.
|<youtube>cSGJo3CFLKQ</youtube>
He is bothered by hypocrisy while at the same time practicing it; he has only one option, BUT IT DOESN'T END THERE. Goronchev haet hypocrisy even moar:
|<youtube>-1595TOu_So</youtube>
He's a sicko. 
|<youtube>qOb8cyE4a0A</youtube>
Smugfag returns for more hate and trolling on [[youtube|internet peoples]]; doesn't realize,
he's being [[rape|used like the condom himself]], so other users can get more [[popular|whoring]],
please thank goronchev for his [[Boring|TL;DR]] videos
|<youtube>kWSP5TVBIQI</youtube>
Smugfag critical of anti scifag [[hate]](Commentary)
|<youtube>6-AzSCCJR_s</youtube>
Chris Crocker talks to smugfag on the phone.
|<youtube>sE0YNmgGnf4</youtube>
Smugfag tries to prove he's got a high [[IQ]] in [[no|intelligence]], but prank calls like he's an
[[13_year_old_boy]]
|<youtube>zG9xn1TLLQ8</youtube>
The [[irony]] of this video is that he wacked off to porn(though faked), but tried to expose
benos for jerking off on cam.
|<youtube>qRg7dZMNwbU</youtube>
Major butthurt when Goronchev gets flagged on youtube.
Goronchev is interviewed by The Burger Keane
|<youtube>a5qAJtZaacc</youtube>
LOL
}}



</center>

== Gallery ==

{{cg|Gallery of Intellect|intelgallery|center|<gallery>
Image:ICchess.jpg|Intellectual Checkmate is now a meme.
Image:Gaysha.JPG|
Image:Gaysha2.JPG|HOLY SHIT! IT IS!
Image:360goronchevclose2.jpg|[[360 kid|The great thing about Intellectual Checkmate isn't destroying ED, it's showing everyone on YouTube that I did.]]
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:Goronchev.jpg|@Smugfag...[[INTERNET HATE MACHINE|you have our attention.]]
Image:YES!POPULAR!.jpg|SNIGGITY SNAP
Image:Goronchev.png|
Image:Bald.png|Fgt is losing his hair lol.
Image:Combover.jpg|[[bald|FOLLICLY CHECKMATED!]]
Image:Smugness.jpg|[[Otaku|Dressed like a geisha]] (Moar liek GAY-sha, [[amirite|amirite]]?)
Image:34 on smugfag.jpg|[[34]] on Smugfag
Image:goronchev_victim.jpg|[[Victim complex|VICTIM]]
Image:SmugfagGF.jpg|[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n5GLbkKEzT8 Smugdyke], Smugfag's [http://www.hotornot.com/r/?eid=SMHRRUK&key=JWV 10/10] MTF "girlfriend"
Image:Smugfag4.jpg|Smugfag: Uses people like a condom.
Image:GoronchevsDick.jpg|[http://goronchev.blogspot.com/2008/01/common-myths-about-me-on-internet-damn.html Goronchev using a dildo to fool people to believing his dick is hueg].
Image:Goronchev straighter than lazer.PNG|Yeah...
Image:Supergay.jpg|Supergay!
Image:Intellectual Faggot.jpg|The losing black piece fits him so well.
Image:SmugfagA ZSCALE.JPG|Hitting on the ladies again with your A-Z scale huh?
Image:Dawguxp5.jpg|Photofunia's version of [[Fail|Smuggod]].
Image:itresembles.jpg|RESEMBLANCE.
Image:Smugfag_adopted.jpg|
Image:Goronchev_wetdream.jpg|Sharing a dream
Image:Smugfag_Claming_Fake_Superority_all_over_again.jpg|Making shitty claims
Image:Smugsleepy.jpg|...Yep, he's straight.
Image:Goronchev BBQ.png|Not shooped.
Image:Weaponsofmasssteroids.jpg|Balding Steroid Abuser ready for action.
Image:Picture_goronchevsuspsended.png|Jewtube finally got the message to him.
Image:Smugfag_douche.JPG|Uses an ear syringe to douche [[santorum]] from his [[micropenis]].
Image:Acatisfinetoogoronchev.jpg|Following the footsteps of [[Kenny Glenn]] his national [[an hero]]. [[A_cat_is_fine_too]]
Image:Goronchev-faggot-demotivational-poster-1211030195.jpg|
Image:Goronchevbaw.png|Smugfag crying over a bodybuilding member trollin him over his dead mum. thread for extra [[lulz]]: http://tinyurl.com/7mvh8ed
Image:Goronchev_drugs.jpg| What he does before making videos.
Image:Goronchevgayblackguy.png| Being hit on by gay [[black_people|niggers]]. Maybe goronchev wants black people to have some [[cum|vanilla]] after all.
Image:27911556.jpg| Keanu is always right.
Image:Mr3bitchslap-1.jpg| Goronchev has a dirty fetish.
Image:Anewchallengerappears.png| The ultimate [[retard]] battle has begun!
File:Goronchev1.jpg
File:Intellectual Checkmate 3.png
File:360goronchev.jpg
File:Speshul.jpg
File:Durrrr.JPG
File:Smugfag.JPG
File:360goronchevclose.jpg
File:Goronchev lulz.JPG
File:Intellectual Checkmate 2.jpg
File:Intellectual Checkmate.jpg
File: GoronchevracistruinedUntitled.png
</gallery>|0}}

== External Links ==
*[https://archive.ph/juAz Goronchev hater group]
*[https://discord.com/channels/607393960301821965/607821077711683584 Discord]
*[https://www.tiktok.com/@themrbomb When it could be worse while acting smug, he joins this shit site where everyone acts like faggots on camera]
*[https://spacehey.com/profile?id=72575 A account no really would care about anyway]
*[https://www.facebook.com/BrawnyRonnie His new facebook to hide from himself again where he flexes his gay body] [https://www.youtube.com/BrawnyRonnie Youtube new Main same old shit:BrawnyRonnie]
[https://www.facebook.com/people/La-Bomb/100000509592396 His facebook is hidden or baleeted due to the exposing of benos revealing facebook chats that goronchev had with his dad]
*<s>[http://brettkeanevideo.com/view_channel.php?user=GhostGoronchev</s> He now resides in brett keane's rectum] Beat up a guy yet not proven to be [[anonymous]] IRL, but only a lie to think he's bigger then [[4chan]] [[Truth|We know he runs scared if someone pulled a knife at him, he's too busy trying to pwn a possible furry named benos on the interweb that no one really cares about]]</s> '''DEAD'''
*[http://twitter.com/goronchev Goronchev's Twatter] [[twitter|twatter]] that he updates for his stickam and other bullshit. He recently tried to [[butthurt|protect his tweets]], because of benos trolling his ass, yet, [[realistic_expectations|they can be still found by searching his name on the website]].
*[http://tinychat.com/goronchev/ Tell how much you love his tiny penis], beware; this is all lies, as he has none.
*[http://www.myspace.com/goronchev Smugfag's MySpace]
*<s>[http://www.myspace.com/ronlamp Smugfag's OTHER MySpayce]</s> Lol private
*[http://tinychat.com/mrsexbomb Goronchev's Tinycock] After [[Stickam]] decided to [[an_hero]], smugfag had to relocate to a smaller [[tinychat|dick]].
*<s>[http://www.stickam.com/profile/goronchev Smugfag's Stickam]</s> Stickam pwned themselves, now goronchev has to rebuild his e-peen once again.
*<s>[http://www.stickam.com/profile/thezone Smugfag's OTHER Stickam made to hide from anon]</s> Same as above
*<s>[http://www.stickam.com/profile/goronchev_live Smugfag's 3rd Stickam profile made to hide from himself]</s> No more dickam!
*<s>[http://www.youtube.com/user/goronchev Smugfag's YouTube]</s> '''SUSPENDED. FOR THE LULZ. Finally.'''
*<s>[http://youtube.com/user/MrThreePercent Smugfag's OTHER YouTube]</s> Lol suspended
*<s>[http://youtube.com/user/smugfagg Spoof YouTube created by a /b/tard]</s> Suspended
*<s>[http://www.livevideo.com/Goronchev Smugfag's LiveVideo]</s> Dead
*<s>[http://yourvision.magnify.net/ yourvision.magnify.net his failed video site]</s> Failed site dead.
*[http://goronchev.blogspot.com/ Gayspot] [[LOL]] [[Butthurt|Invite only]] because benos' been taking down his failed videos.
*<s>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzvkWNy3OzQ][http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u-KVtA3lJp8][http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQ-OS9lQ7OI] Smugfag declaring war on various chans</s> ZOMG Private? How are we going to stroke your e-peen now???
*[http://www.myfoxla.com/myfox/pages/Home/Detail;jsessionid=4D800A279B3CEAD006A31E0876588922?contentId=5647826&version=4&locale=EN-US&layoutCode=VSTY&pageId=1.1.1&sflg=1 Smugfag on FOX11 NEWS] He calls himself a [[Lulz|'victim']].
*[http://youtube.com/SubVLPer Another possible socket account with stickam chats. Though, he cannot stick to many accounts already, that faggot]
*http://gorenchev.blogspot.com A satirical blog created by Benos
*[https://www.facebook.com/pages/Goronchev-the-worst-vlogger-who-ever-lived/310607445617221 An anti-Goronchev Facebook group. Join for the lulz!]
*[https://www.youtube.com/user/LaRoathTheGoat Iliketofuckgoats ] Possible socket account with many of goronchev's old vids, just trying to be your [[lame|average]], everyday, [[white_people|white]] guy.
See lulzy background with a obsession with the goronchev and benos drama that still wages on once and awhile.
*[http://www.pornolize.com/translate/?lang=en&url=https://encyclopediadramatica.online/Goronchev Goronchev Pornolized] If you want to see how gay goronchev can get while pornolized.
*<s>[http://facepunch.com/member.php?u=144999 Facepunch account ] Possible account on facepunch/or hoping to troll his number 1 fan Benos by stalking him. There is proof of that in his [[fail|exposing]] video.</s> DEAD

== See Also ==
*[[TheSockDetective]]
*[[MrFetch]]
*[[Unwarranted self-importance]]
*[[Internet tough guy]]
*[[Not Gay]]
*[[Lolcow]]
*[[Asking for it]] (is saying too little)
*[[GreenTeaGirlie]]
*[[Ugly]]
*[[Pedophile]]
*[[Failure]]
*[[Idiot]]
*[[Derek Smart]]

{{Takedown}}
{{ytseries}}
{{chans}}

{{Timeline|Featured article December 14, [[2007]]|[[Penis Nosed Fox]]|Smugfag|[[Robert Hawkins]]}}

[[Category:Abnormal_Psych]]
[[Category:Internets Phenomena]]
[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Memes]]
[[Category:Chans]]
[[Category:2007]]

CatboyKami

2024-10-03T10:11:06Z

Lazarus:

{{SickFuck}}
{{ib|[[File:Kami.png|400px]]}}
{{Ibhead|Tor Gustafsson Brookes (CatboyKami)}}
{{Ibrow|'''Born'''|July 5th, 1998}}
{{Ibrow|'''Nationality'''|[[Australia|Fockin' 'Strayan Cunt]]  [[File:MiniflagAustralia.png]]}}
{{Ibrow|'''Residence'''|Brisbane, [[Australia|'Straya]]  [[File:MiniflagAustralia.png]]}}
{{Ibrow|'''Ethnicity'''|[[Cowboy|'Strayan]]}}
{{Ibrow|'''Gender'''|Male}}
{{Ibrow|'''Political Preference'''|[[Nazi|Nigger-Hatin' Conservative]]}}
{{Ibrow|'''Sexuality'''|[[Bisexual]]}}
{{Ibrow|'''Occupation'''|Streamer}}
{{Ibend}}

'''CatboyKami''' ([[Powerword]]: '''Tor Gustafsson Brookes''') also known as [[pedophile|'''lolisocks''']] is a {{age|1998|07|05}}-year-old [[Nazi|far right]], [[White nationalist|White Nationalist]] streamer and edgy retard cunt from [[Australia|'Straya]] who is known for his live streams of going on Omegle and screaming racial slurs at random kids to save the white race and defeat the ZOG. Kami`s knowledge of his politics and da joos purely consists of overused talking points anyone can find on a typical [[pol|/pol/]] thread.

[[File:FuckboyKami.jpg|thumb|right|250px|"Savior of the white race"]]
[[File:Pedoboykami.jpeg|thumb|right|200px|Kami IRONICALLY defending lolis]]

Though Kami would like you to believe that he is trying to awaken and save his [[KKK|fellow white people]], hes actually just an [[Attention whore|attention seeking freak]]. Kami loves to scream about how the [[Jews|joos]] are trying to spread degeneracy and pollute and corrupt the white race when in reality, Kami himself is a huge degenerate freak who [[Faggot|cross dresses]], proudly admits to jerking off to [[hentai]] and [[loli]] porn, and fucks transgenders.

Whats even worse is that Kami isn't ashamed to openly admit to doing any of those things. We should also add that Kami is currently dating a [[Literally|literal]] [[Femboy|trap]]. His bedroom wall is also [[Ironically|(ironically)]] completely flooded with posters of lolis and transgender anime waifus. But of course Kami is ONLY PRETENDING and does all of this IRONICALLY, right?

== Personal Life ==
While streaming on omegle, Kami seems like a perfectly normal lad who just wants to "redpill" and "educate" people on the evils of ZOG and to make fun of minorities. This couldn't be further from the truth as Kami is an absolute freak behind closed doors and is the complete opposite of what he preaches once that webcam goes off. His many pastimes include [[cross dressing|cosplaying as women]], hitting on 15 year olds, watching loli porn, and hooking up with transgenders and femboys. The fact that this kid's username is [[Furfag|"Catboy"]] should have really been a red light for his fanbase.

== CatboyKami: the beginning ==
Kami had his humble beginnings as a typical lets play gaming commentary youtuber starting back in 2016. This was until one day in 2019, Kami met his soulmate, [[Nick Fuentes]], a typical white nationalist who unsurprisingly is also a complete homosexual degenerate that fucks men. Kami and Fuentes naturally started hitting it off and they IRONICALLY went on a romantic date for a whole day while Kami was rocking his cat ears and a maid dress. From there on, Kami just like his sexual partner Fuentes figured he could follow Nicholas`s same path and become a white nationalist streamer purely for attention whoring purposes.

== Kami's omegle fuckery ==
During the peak of the worldwide George Floyd chimpout, [[transracial|transnigga]] Kami decided to go stream himself on omegle wearing blackface, rocking nigger clothing while speaking in a thick [[ebonics|gorilla]] accent as part of his act as a stereotypical [[nigger]]. This act solicited a lot of lulzy reactions of all kinds and Kami quickly became a folk hero in the [[faggot|white nationalist community]] and [[4chan]] and went viral around the internet.

Along with this, butthurt petitions and constant kvetching from the [[Jews|Anti Defamation League]] and from niggers rapidly circulated on the internet begging to deplatform Kami and ban him from the internet. This of course did nothing but inspire Kami to do more for the lulz. Kami went on to play more offensive and stereotypical characters such as a orthodox rabbi, Derek Chauvin, and a stereotypical gook wearing yellow face while [[coronavirus|eating bat soup]].

==Kami's Rape Allegation==
After the viewers of America first were upset about bringing this [[pedo|pedophile]] on the show, Kami went on the Weekly sweat podcast to get street cred. He ended up staying at Princehubris/Sean Mcaffrey's house, where he raped a passed out girl at a house party. This resulted in Hubris leaving the internet for good after it came out he had [[gay]] sex with Kami in front of his girlfriend, who is also [[Baked_Alaska|Baked Alaska's]] former manager.

==Kick Stream Channel==
https://kick.com/notcatboykami

{{collapsegallery|Tor's Omegle Adventures|cg1|center|<gallery>
File:Transnigga.jpg|He is a transnigga.
File:Transnigga2.jpg|See what I said?
File:Chauvin.jpg|Kami's bootlicking.
File:Transgook.jpg|And a [[Covid|bat-soup eating]] [[azn|chink]].
File:Jewishpig.jpg|Of course he can also be a j00. Complete with circumsised babies.
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:GayKami.png|Pretending to be a [[trap]] or living up to his name.
File:NiggaKamiArt.jpg|Artist's impression.
File:Transnigga3.jpg|How the omegle encounters went down.
</gallery>
}}

{{Portals|anime|gaming|gay}}
{{Pedoseries}}

[[Category:People|Hedley, Philip]]