Encyclopedia Dramatica - Things to revert [en]

Cambodia

2026-05-15T15:55:48Z

Gooksu: /* see also */

{{crapstub}}
{{Warzone}}
'''Cambodia''' is a shithole country known for tons of [[gooks]]. It is similar to neighboring [[Vietnam]] in that it's a commie-run shithole country run by azn cryptojews. It is a puppet state of [[China]] and run by a stoner named [[Pol Pot]] and Nuon Chea. The chief of navy is Meas Muth. All are convicted war criminals and they don't want it any other way.
[[File:Khmer_Rogue_Massacre.jpg|thumb|Some Khmer soldiers with a souvenir from the massacre]]

The main business of the Cambodian economy is receiving tribute from [[Chink]] criminal organizations in exchange for condoning their kidnapping of foreigners and committing [[Scam|Scams]].
== see also ==
* [[Azn]]
* [[Scam]]
* [[Thailand]]
* [[Vietnam]]
* [[China]]

{{commonwealth}}
{{azn}}
{{Qing}}

File:Russian man and South Korean woman.jpg

2026-05-15T14:03:40Z

Gooksu:

China

2026-05-15T13:58:47Z

Gooksu: /* Military */

{{spoiler|CHINESE CAN HAVE <s>TWO</s> THREE KIDS NOW! LET THE CHINK FUCKATHON BEGIN}}
 
{{Offended}}
 
<center>[[File:ED-China-Flag.png|350px|link=]][[Image:TibetFlag.png|350px|link=]]
China's National Flags</center>
 
[[File:Chinesewomanatwork.gif|thumb|What Chinese women do best.]]
[[File:Real map of China.jpg|right|300px]]
[[Image:Chinese_Roller_Coaster.jpg|thumb|Riding a roller coaster into a [[AIDS|baby formula]] processing facility.]]
[[Image:Preasetoshowpapers.jpg|thumb|YOU NO HAVE RIGHTS HERE WHITE DEVIR (and neither do we, tee hee!)]]
[[File:blaxygirls.jpeg|thumb|Only approved K-Pop group in China because of [[moonspeak|秦香莲三十二岁那状告当朝驸马郎欺君王瞒皇上悔婚男儿招东床]].]]

Meet the only race [[Divide by 0|that can out-Jew]] a Jew (without being or having jews). '''China''', known to many of its inhabitants as the [[hubris|center of the world]] [[shit nobody cares about|(in Chinese, China is 中国 [zhongguo] which literally means "center country")]],or [[Mordor|Middle Kingdom]] (or the asian version of [[US]] for the rest of the world) is a giant industrial park in [[Asia]]. It has [[OVER 9000|so many people]] that they've instituted a [[Dead babies|One-child policy]]. One of Amurka's [[Walmart|largest trading partners]], China has been known to export [[Lulz|defective and dangerous products]], an unfortunate result of their religious adherence to their retarded [[Capitalism|"manufacture uber-cheap, sell uber-cheap, FUCK EVERYTHING ELSE, CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP"]] universal manufacturing standards that the US still loves to buy.

It is also very important to note that the [[moonspeak|Engrish]] manuals that Chinese products come with are, for the most part, examples of the greatest heights of Engrish grammar and prose. They're so great, in fact, most people would feel their head aching on reading the first few lines, while others feel a sudden urge to hurt someone. Also, [[some argue]] that the Chinese are [[Lolwut|inscrutable]]. [[Eurofags|Others]] would say [[Americunts]] are shitting their pants when hearing of the country.

{{quote|The only good Chink is a dead Chink.|[[common knowledge]]}}

One may refer to the people of China by many names, including:

*Pre-viral lifeform
*[[Oriental]]
*Chinaman or Chinawoman
*Chiggers (Chink + nigger)
*Rice niggers
*Chink
*Chiamese
*Chine
*Chino
*Ching Chong
*[[Taiwan]]ese
*[[Asia|Gooks]]
*Jackie Chan (Fact: Every Chinaman is Jackie Chan or an impersonator of him.)
*The Jews of Asia
*The country that [[buttrape]]d the US economy without lube (in sweety dreams of Eurofags)
*Asian [[Jews|Hebrews]]. For reference, [[Japanese]] are [[Nazi|Germans]], [[Indonesia|Austro]][[Malaysia|nesians]] are Black South Africans and Arabs, [[Koreans]] are [[Palestine|Palestinians]], [[Communists|Southeast Asians]] (Mainlanders) are [[Slav|Eastern Europeans]] and the Filipinos are Mexicans
*[[Chris-chan|Vagina]]

==Yellow soup==
[[Image:Spreadem.jpg|thumb|[[Over 9,000]] years of Chinese wisdom has much to teach us.]]
[[Image:ZhWikipediaLiuxinyu970226.png|thumb|Typical Wikipedia userpage of a PRC nationalist.]]

Ancient Chinese secret! Yellow soup is shit soup! [[Wikipedia:Fecal bacteriotherapy|China invent]]. Bery good. You food poison? You diarrhea so bad? Eat shit [[Brb, soup|soup]]! Eat my [[shit]]! China know for 4th century! Steel after twelve hunderd year [[Fact|Li Shizhen use shit soup treat bad abdomen]]! True story! Make stomach strong! Chinese medicine work! No listen Western medicine! So stupid! Bad for you! Antibiotic make superbug! Western medicine make superbug bad for you! Shit soup is answer! Shit soup is golden syrup!

[[Image:China map.jpg|thumb|The map of China. See the non-white space? THAT'S China!!!]]

'''Recipe for shit soup''': I shit bowl, just add water. You drink! Drink up! Is cure for you! Fresh soup bery hot. No bowl? I shit in mouth! No die diarrhea. No die dysentery. Shit soup good for all things! Drink my shit! Cure autoimmune disease! Cure fatness! Cure diabetes! Cure MS! Cure Parkinsons! China know cure for century! You have cholera? You have typhoid fever? You have plague? Eat shit or die! Animal shit good also. Camel shit work also. [[Nazi]] soldier in [[Africa]] know this! Why you think [[dog]] eat shit? Even dog know this! Dog know more than Western doctor!

Warning! Not all shit good for eat. No shit from sick person. Bad shit. Bad shit make sick, good shit make well. So simple! Need good shit. Shit healthy person. [[Truth|FDA agree]]! [[Fact|Human shit experimental drug since 2013]]! Donate at shit bank! China know for century. My shit good. You eat! You drink! Drink my shit! Good for you! China #1 exporter good shit! My shit medicine for you! No like shit soup? I shit, I freeze dry, put in pill, you eat! Shit pill cure you! Shit pirr cure famiry! I prescribe shit pill for you! Eat my shit dayree! Home remedy prepare for sickness: healthy person shit, store in freezer. Illness? Eat own good shit. No lie! No freezer no problem. Warm fresh shit often best medicine! China cure epidemic! Try many shit over many year. Have [[Ebola]]? Eat shit person survive Ebola. So easy. Many animal eat dung. Animal more wise than Western doctor! Panda elephant hippo koala all eat mother shit. China know shit. Shit soup best medicine. So wise Panda. Thank you Panda teach China.

==Chinese People==

[[File:Meanwhile... in china.jpg|thumb|Meanwhile, in China...]]

Many have pondered the [[Sex|reason for China's incredible population size]], only to be baffled by the obvious [[ugly|ugliness]] of the [[women]], but chinese men are much ulgier. The [[UK|United Kingdom's]] greatest [[philosopher]], Prince Philip, declared Chinese women to be the "[[Fugly|ugliest in the world]]". Out of all types of [[azn]], chinks are by far the ugliest. Only 1 person out of every 1,000 people born of the abominable Chinese race is worth looking at.

[[image:Kinkajou_Chinkajou.jpg|thumb|There IS a difference.]]

The Chinese population has more than doubled, from 563 million in 1950 to over 1.3 billion in 2005. This makes the Communist Party's Republic of China severely overpopulated. As such, the Chinese Communist Party has mastered the art of sacrificing Chinese people with campaigns like the Great Leap Forward (1959–1961),[[I did it for the lulz|which killed 30-40 million people, and the Cultural Revolution
(1966–1976) with 7–8 million casualties.]] Also the first Chinese sport is Nikes manufacturing.

[[File:Chinese kid stomping on Japanese flag.jpg|thumb|left|300px|How the Chinese show their love for Japan.]]

The Han Chinese are proud of their ancient heritage of being ruled over by foreigners during non-Chinese dynasties like the British Empire who pwned their way into Hong Kong with LULZ.

Despite the big cultural and linguistic diversity in China, they try to maintain the homogeneous population myth, and [[Liberal|lay claim to lands that historically never belonged to China proper (e.g. Taiwan)]].

Much like niggers with their basketball, spics with their menial labor and whites with their faggotry, chiggers (aka Rice Niggers) have their own special array of talents. At a young age, many boys are forced to engage in a life of studying the Confucian rites and being able to apply all that bullshit to the math and physics they're forced to cram for on a study night.

[[image:ChineseFemale.png|thumb|A typical Chinese female.]]
[[image:domathfast.jpg|thumb|Another typical Chinese [[math]] plantation.]]
[[Image:Crazyasianlady.jpg|thumb|Chinese women are known for their unique beauty and intelligence.]]

China actually had a interesting culture 100 years ago. But like everything else, Japanese culture invaded and now Chinese also have to display the peace sign in every photograph they take. Nowadays, Chinese people copy from American, European and Japanese culture. China [[b/|no longer displays original content]].

The Chinese countryside is dotted with sweatshops full of [[loli|child laborers]]. It is said that the sound of their shoemaking can be heard from Mars. However, the years of labor they endure is all worth it, as on payday they are each given a small sum of sand and a handful of dog hairs.

Exactly 100% of Chinamen spend most of their lives as slaves in math plantations.

*To be honest and frank, have you ever met a worthy Chinaman? Hmm? No? Didn't think so...

===National Anthem===
 
{{frame|<youtube>Qv9wk5lgGFo</youtube>|border=yellow|background=red|margin=auto}}
 
===Chinese Hobbies===
[[File:Asianlolz.jpg|thumb|Get your own chinky-eye grasses; hurry up whire suppries rast!]]
[[File:JONES_vs_CHINKS.gif|thumb|Dr. Jones demonstrates the correct way to handle a Chinese chinamen, they ''no rikey''.]]

*Inspecting [[cunts]] through voyeurism.
*Pretending not to speak English
*Chopping off peoples penises to get eunuchs.
*Eating anything that moves and shitting epidemics. See [[SARS]] and [[AIDS]].
*Shouting in loud, annoying voices with a horrible sounding language.
*Preparing for sweatshop work at age 3.
*Wishing their dicks were bigger.
*Manufacturing inscrutably low-quality, knock-off products that break upon use.
*Manufacturing malfunctioning weapons to other countries who are at war with each other only to make money. See [[Russia]] and [[USA]].
*Doing [[math]].
*Playing [[Genshin Impact]] and trying to have sex
*Butchering the English language by trying to adopt [[Ebonics]].
*Counter-Racism
*Being just like [[Jews]]
*Farming virtual [[World of Warcraft|gold]] to sell to [[basement dwellers]].
*Surpassing the [[The Jewnited States of Americunts|U.S.]] as being the most environmentally-destructive, air and water-polluting nation on the planet.
*Hating [[Niggers]] better than [[americunts]] (especially the [[India|Curry Nigger]] and [[Indonesia|Shore Nigger]])
*Sending butthurt, stupid, smelly Indonesian Muslims to help the Jew-sent, Syrian Rapefugees rape Europe to death.
*Taking a shit in holes
*Standing on toilet bowls to shit
*Shitting in another country
*Justify the meaning of"支那"
*Being nippy
*[https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2867219/Inside-Chinese-fur-farms-breed-raccoon-dogs-tiny-cages-skin-alive-make-luxury-coats-sold-West.htmll Skinning animals alive]
*Videotape [[Wang Jue|themselves]] crushing cats to death for [[sick fuck|fap material]].
*Use shitty carcinogenic '''{{ytlink|e7S7r31cjAQ|gutter oil}}''' to cook noodles and sell them on the streets.

=== 2008 Beijing Orimpics ===

Main article: [[LOLympic Games]] 

[[Image:OrympicShoopSinger.jpg|thumb|China's amazing Shoop-da-Mexican, used to make Mexicans from nothing. [[Pedobear|PEDOBEAR]] APPROVES.]]

[[Image:Happy Happy Happy.jpg|thumb|A typical slave to the Dalai Lama.]]

[[Image:TeamBWWOOOOONG.jpg|thumb|Team China has their eyes on the ball...and the gold.]]

Beijing was fortunate enough to <strike>win</strike> purchase the bid for the 2008 Orimpic Games, and they have delivered on a promise to give the world an amazing competition.

The August 8th Opening Ceremony of the Orimpics started off with a bang. The nation that invented fireworks gave the world the most impressive display of photoshopped fireworks ever seen. The fun did not stop there; after ¥1 Billion Renminbi and years of hard work, Chinese computer engineers managed to create a program able to shoop an attractive child over an [[ugly]] child with talent.

As the Orimpics got underway, Team China dominated the in the child labor competition, winning the gold with two of the youngest loli to have ever competed. It wasn’t long before everyone was asking how China managed to train some of the best underage athletes in the world. The Chinese reveled their forced labor training camps where loli are selected at the tender age of 3 for rigorous training in making high quality Nikes and lead-covered sports equipment for other teams. (Team Wal-Mart was disappointed in the Chinese decision to reveal secret training exercises.)

While performing well in the child labor competition, the U.S.of fucking A. try-hard "Redeem "Shitfaced" Team" has hurt China's chances of earning the gold in the Orimpic Basketball Tournament. However, hopes still ride on Yao Ming to bring home a metal. The Chinese state-sponsored coaching staff hopes by training Ming into the ground and destroying his career as a basketball player, they will be victorious in earning the gold for Team China. In a statement to the press Ming said, "If I don' bring home the gorrd they wirr kirr my famiry and reprace me wit any one of severar mirrions erigibre Chinese basketba' praya." You can bet that Ming's famiry will be cheering for him during the games.

China did however excel in spitting, bottle peeing, and shitting in holes. Unfortunately, none of these activities are recognized Olympic events. Regardless, the Chinese moved forward, with each day in the events producing more spit, urine and feces than one could ever have possibly imagined. These events climaxed with the closing ceremonies, where Chinese performers ended the games with a series of enormous bowl movements, the drowning of several Chinese "dissidents" in a spit / urine pool, and a secondary invasion of Taiwan.

The Chinese government broadcast the events on live TV, then quickly denied the incident ever occurred, right after calling Google to ask for another "favor".

[[Image:Kexin platinum.jpg|thumb|400px|center|[[In_Soviet_Russia...|In Communist China]], loli destroys [https://nastialiukin.com/ ''your''] life.]]

===Things They Don't Want You to Know===
[[File:Chinese claw machine.jpg|thumb|right|100% of China's youth are chain smokers.]]
*Fact: China's National Motto? China: The Land of Spit and Tobacco.
*Fact: Chinese city workers can't dig up roads to repair pipe systems as the natural instinct for a Chinese person when they see an open hole in the ground is to shit in it. It is estimated that the Chinese population could fill the Grand Canyon is less than three minutes.
*Fact: Anything a Chinese person can pee in WILL be peed in. Example: empty water bottles, plastic sandwich baggies, purses, the pocket of a stranger, rectums, vaginas, open sewers (AKA: China)
*Fact: Chinese pussy is hairy and sideways.
*Fact: China almost got nuked in the Sino-Soviet border conflict.
*Fact: Chinese [[women]] have small [[breasts]]. Any Chinese [[women]] you see with normal or large breasts has implants. The [[men]], like all [[azn|asians]], have small [[penis|penises]].
*Fact: The [[ED]] website is not censored in China.
*Fact: Chinese families name their newborn babies by gathering their whole family together and smash glass plates on the floor.
*Fact: The Chinese take pleasure in gobbing on pavements, in restaurants and on each other for that matter. This frequent transfer of bodily fluids is considered more effective in getting woman pregnant. Even children, amirite?
*Fact: What the fuck is a [[Taiwan]]?

===Chinese Childcare===

Children in China are treated like crap. They are either eaten as a staple food, chained to posts like animals and/or brutally molested as a sport. Those "lucky" enough to survive till the age of 3 are given the privilege of being [[socialism|socially sold]] into mandatory slavery for the greater glory of the country in a sweatshop.

{{cg|Chinklets||center|<gallery perrow="6">
Image:Fetus soup 2.jpg|Fetuses are often revered as a Chinese delicacy.
Image:BabyDog.jpg| "HOW FAR CAN I GO ON CHAIN?"
Image:ChineseCarryOut.jpg|--Ancient traditional Chinese method of [[child abuse|transportation]].-- Actually, the baby in the plastic bag is actually a picture taken in [[good Korea]]
Image:Catburger.jpg
Image:China_-_Raw_Puppy_Eats.jpg
Image:Babysoup5.jpg|Yummy!
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="6">
</gallery>
|}}

[[PROTIP]]: Google "Chen Chuanliu".

Chinese babies don't wear diapers, as they're far too expensive for 3rd world bordering chinky chip slave laborers only making 10 cents an hour to churn out [[Apple]] and [[My Little Pony]] crap. As such parents rely on "split pants", letting the child just shit and piss all over the floor and themselves. As a result, most chinklets are treated like animals and caged or tied up outdoors. The "split pants" also offer a unique "double feature" in that it allows for "easy access" to China-men who recreationally molest young children, which is in fact a national sport in China.

{{cg|Split Pants||center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:China_-_Split_Pants_-_01.jpg
Image:China_-_Split_Pants_-_02.jpg
Image:China_-_Split_Pants_-_03.jpg
Image:China_-_Split_Pants_-_04.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
</gallery>
|}}

===Famous Chinese===
#[[Confusion|Confucius]]
#Winnie the Pooh
#Lin Zhong Min
#Guan Yin
#[[Kill Bill|Pai Mei]]
#Bruce Lee (and clones Bruce Li, Bruce Lei, Blues Ree etc)
#Christopher Lee
#[[Pokemon|Hitmonlee]]
#[[Pokemon|Hitmonchan]]
#[[Pokemon|Hitmontop]]
#Mao Ze [[loldongs|Dong]]
#[[Kill Bill|O-ren Ishii]]
#[[Elliot Rodger]]
#Zhang Zongchang (AKA Dogmeat General, Infamous Warlord who made a tons of lulzy Poems, Seriously. Look em up.)
#Yao Ming
#Ho-Ming Mee Sao
#Wang Wei (The pilot who took down an American plane and made them apologize)
#Ming The Merciless
#Fu Manchu
#Yin-Yang Twins
#Lao Tse
#[[Goatse|Goa Tse]]
#[[Edison Chen]] (the hero with many jpegs to back him up)
#David Carradine
#Ms. Wang ([https://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/17/us/17student.html Infamous traitor of China that was exposed by the Internet and the New York Times])
#Sum-ting Wong
#Wi-tu Lo
#Hoo-lee Fuk
#Bang-ding Ow
#O-chin Chin
#Lu-Bu
#Lu-Wi
#Helen Yoo
#Long-Ho
#Hu-Dat
#Jackie Chan
#Chris Rock
#Donnie Yen
#Stephen Chow
#Ching Chong
#Cheng Chang
#Peter Chao (The guy who rubbed his own crap on a building)
#Kim Jung Il
#That white guy from Kung Pow
#[[Bill Clinton]]
#[[Chuck Norris]]
#[[Belgium|Jean Claude Van Damme]]
#[[Kevin Rudd]]
#Long Le
#Steven Segal
#[[Street Fighter|Chun-Li]]
#William Hung
#William Fu
#Jason Statham
#Jet Li
#[[Pokemon|Brock]]
#Yung Shin Boys
#[[Michael Phelps]]
#Lo Wang (Fictional character from Shadow Warrior, made by the same guys that made [[Duke Nukem 3D]].)
#Wei Shen (Protagonist of Sleeping Dogs, Made by the same guys behind the True Crime series.)
#[[Pwnt|Dalai Lama]]
#[[Christopher Walken]]
#[[hippy|Tommy Chong]]
#Hu Flung Dung
#Adolf Hitler
#[[George Bush]]
#[[The Matrix|Agent Smith]]
#[[Geert Wilders]]
#Wu Tang Clan
#[[Batman|Mr. Lau]]
#[[You|Yu]]
#Wowkie Zhang
#Pagan Min (The faggy antagonist of [[Far Cry|Far Cry 4]].)
#[[Touhou|Hong Meiling]]
#[[RWBY|Yang Xiao Long]]
#[[John Cena|John Xina]]
#[[Dwayne Johnson|The Wok]]

==Government==

[[Image:ChinasRedArmyFly1.jpg|thumb|HOLY SHI- They can FLY?]]

<s>One of the few remaining [[Communist]] regimes in the world, China's leader is always a member of the Communist Party of China.</s> China is now "[[Socialist]]". While the Democratic Party of China, founded in 1998, tried to make a go of it, their leaders were [[Pwnt|promptly detained]] and sent to [[Holocaust|"correction facilities"]].

[[Fascist|President]] Hu Jintao, when he's not busy stomping on kittens, has overseen the rise of China from a third world nation to an [[Wal-Mart|economic superpower]] (but still third world nation). lulwut? Open mouth insert truck of cocks you dumb piece of shit, after the Hilarious Chinacost that oldskool commies unleashed during the Cultural Revolution it was for Deng Xiao Ping to divert the chinacide to what outcummed as an economic development, hence, China finally stopped sucking cock and became [[Wal-Mart|economic superpower]]. There is more to that, If you weren't smoking pot during Elmo Street, you'd know that during WWII China got raeped hard by the Japan niggaz. Back then Commies were nothing but your average Fallout 3 wastelander hobos, living on sucking Russia's delicious cock, Republic of China with Chiang Kai-shek as the Leader owned the street cred in the back days.
[[Image:Chinamastercard.jpg|thumb|Chinese Electricians]] So, when Japz went partying hard at Shanghai and especially at Nanking, Commies and Kuominttangs didn't give a flying fuck and continued to saw out each other. Eventually they "united" and fought back. Little did they know, that after the war, casualties were counted and bricks of uranium were said to be shat, for it turned out, that the Japz lost hardly 1.3 million samurais, 700 000 of which were ass fucked as POW's by glorious IVAN's army in Korea, and China managed to get their dicks cut by 30 000 000 (thirty million) people. 1.3 million to 30 millions, kinda tells a lot 'bout chinese army, amirite. So, after the war ended, Chinks had a small civil war between Commies and Kuomintang ended with Chiang Kai-shek GTFO to Taiwan with all the gold and hookers, thus on 1st October of 1949 People's Republic of China was born. USSR, UK, even Germany were quickly recovering form WWII, but China was still in mid 16th century, having no industry, no telecom and no 4chan, but as they were commies they pledged for some hard soviet cock in their tight azn pussies and so a glorious path to Prosperity began. [[File:Chink government.jpg|right|300px]] To cut a long story short, Chinks got a fuckton of OIL in factories, telecom, 2ch, 4ch, Chris Hansen, education and even nukes from USSR, 'till Stalin decided to GTFO forever, with Khurshev being Steve Ballmer, Mao got pissed with USSR, they even attacked USSR's border posts in 1969 scoring some frags. And there was but one country, that rejoiced at such an outcome - the US of A. Back in China with no Soviet cock, commie leaders initiated Chinacide, so when Deng Xiao Ping finally got some street cred, he had a fucking great Idea - If we can't have some delicious Soviet Penis, we could ask for PHAT AMERICUNT DONGS in our asses, as it happened with President Nixon's Shocking visit to PRC in 1973. Which brings us to the beggings - Deng Xiao Ping is responsible for China's economic growth and the fact, that China WILL ALWAYS CRAVE FOR PHAT COCKS.

China's government is also known for its [[Lie|sterling Human Right's]] record, treating more diverse members of its society such as Falun Gong adherents and Tibetan Buddhists with the utmost [[torture|dignity]] and [[Party_van|respect]].

===Military===
[[File:Great Wall of Doge.jpg|thumb|Built in 6th century BC, the Great Wall of Doge is a testament to Chinese militarism.]]
While China was famous in the past for [[Epic_fail|losing hard]] to the [[Japanese]], [[Korean]], [[Russians]], [[Mexicans]], [[Vietnamese]], Martians, homosexuals, and 3rd grade girls, the latter half of the 20th Century saw a dramatic turnabout in China's ability to wage war.

In [[Korea]] and [[Vietnam]] they were notorious for their [[Zerg Rush]]es against [[Americunt]] forces.

Recent advances include:

*The selling of Nuclear Arms secrets to China by [[Bill Clinton]] (thanks a lot, asshole).
*The selling of uranium to China by [[Australia|drunk convicts]].
*The purchasing of diesel-electric submarines that can sneak up on unsuspecting [[Americunt]] ships.

'''Disadvantages of the China Zerg Rush:'''
[[File:Second opium warb17fec93446e2bf26b74.jpg|thumb|right|The Chinese military gets bitch-slapped by Europe's [[awesome|epic military power]] during the 2nd Opium Wars]]
It costs the Chinese government approximately $1 to give their soldiers a cheap uniform and a basic two-day training course. That is not difficult. However, it is quite expensive to produce weapons, even if they are cheap, unreliable pieces of shit. Thus, the government forced everyone to learn Kung Fu in hopes that they might have rare chance of winning if they ever get close enough to engage in hand to hand combat. In a group of five Chinamen, there will be one or two with rifles the rest might be armed with Dao swords and Three-section staffs,lol! The others will just throw fireballs at you and hope you die like a low budget Kung Fu film. China often parades its military equipment since they've made some progress since the "great leap forward" but most of their weapons are outdated. It's a ploy to convince its neighbors that attacking China is foolhardy but the truth is that China only has its massive infantry division as an asset. When the world and China's neighbors realize that China is in reality actually a very weak country with only the power to only oppress its citizens, China will get pimp-slapped like an overdosed hooker as it has been in the past.

[[Image:ChinasRedArmyFly3.jpg|thumb|Harry Potter is speechless...]]
[[Image:Koreanwarchinks.jpg|thumb|Chinese troops taken prisoner during the Korean War and begging for their lives from South Korean soldiers]]

'''Advantages:'''
No country has unlimited ammunition. If a country is unprepared and doesn't have reserves while a group of troops is firing at the [[Zerg_Rush|never ending horde]], a Chinaman will fly around the back and Kung Fu their [[ass]] up.

Fuck with one, fuck with them all, and you're bound to get Kung Fu-cked Up. <strike>Why bother messing with them?</strike> [[HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS|HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT I EAT DOG]].

'''Nukes'''

China has nukes, but like every other country with nukes it knows that if it is dumb enough to use 'em, the USA will pwn their entire country to glass and then shit on the radioactive remains from a great height.

==Economy==
[[File:China Loli Rd.png|thumb|right|250px|Chinese equivalent of Wall St.]]
[[File:China Bacon Apartment.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Fresh meats can be purchased from your neighbor.]]
The people of China are willing to work hard for little money, from a [[Children|young age]] until they drop dead. Without their hard work, most people in places like [[Australia]], [[Canada]] and [[United States]] would be [[Wal-Mart|naked, living in trees, and eating berries]].

Chinese spies spent years studying the American economy from secret bases in Chinatowns. They copied the capitalistic economy, while keeping the dictatorial political system.

The Chinese mastered the art of sleazy economic competition. They deliberately pegged their Yuan currency to the Dollar so Chinese products always stay cheaper than American, and other developed countries.
It ensures massive Chinese product exports so America and co. are swamped with cheap crap and cannot compete in this unfair trade scheme.
Much of America's industry and jobs has been outsourced to eager Chinese sweatshops.

The United States turned into an unsustainable consumer country of primarily Chinese products. This dirty trick created an enormous trade deficit and national debt for America.
The American leaders are oblivious to the perils, and spend like drunken sailors, addicted to everything Made in China. Especially the mail in waifus from china. Bitch will make my sandwich and suck my small asian wee wee.

1.00 USD = 7 Chinese Yuan (also known as "one month's wages").

'''Opinion of Chinafag:''' A little known fact is that China Likes Big American Cock. They way it tastes like shit reminds me of how my mom tasted after the Tiananmen Square Massacre. When my friends say to me eat her dead body and ask, "wing wang. What the fuck are you doing?" I replied, "My food stamps ran out. The government was displeased by my -A in math, so I needed to eat my mom to survive."

===Economic Policy===
The three step economic policy used by China:
*[[Accidentally]] the paint.
*????
*PROFIT!!!

===Exports===
[[File:Opium merchant.jpg|right|300px]]
Some notable Chinese exports include:
*[[McDonald's]] Happy Meal toys
*[[My Little Pony]] toys.
*Lead paint
*Diseased chicken
*[[AIDS|Bird Flu]]
*Fleshlights
*[[Irony|American Flags]]
*African Genocide
*Your local congressman
*Pirated copies of anything and everything
*Rice
*Orange chicken, chow mein, and wontons
*<s>Chinese food</s> urban myth, Chinese food is actually made in [[Wisconsin]], land of the [[Norway|nordcucks]] and [[Sweden|swedesluts]] (arguably more cheaper and obedient then chinese)
*Stuntmen
*Chinatowns that take up all the local jobs
*Malware such as Nimda
*Everything else

==History==

[[Image:GreatFirewall.jpg|thumb|right|The last Great Wall didn't work any better...]]
{{quote|The [[death]] toll stands at nine thousand, and that number looks certain [[Over 9000|to rise]].|BBC 6 PM News, 12 May 2008 on the Great Sichuan Earthquake.}}
The People's Republic of China is not an inheritor of previous dynasties which were created by foreign barbarians. The PRC has false imperialistic claims to territories that never belonged to China proper ([[Tibet]], Taiwan, Manchuria). Despite that, the Chinese Communist Party led by [[Hitler|Mao]] still managed to [[Pwn|conquer]] the two countries of Tibet. Adding to the humiliation is the fact that China was a mainly aggrarian country when said countries were conquered.

Starting in 1959, the Chinese started dying from famine on a massive scale. One of the consequence is that there are few to no pets in China. Despite [[PETA|what some retards]] say, [[cat|cats]] and [[dogs]] are just food there. One more reason why the Chinese found a way to make just about anything digestible. It is estimated that over 30 million people died. The famine was ended in 1961 by [[Lmao_Zedong|Mao Zedong]] importing grain from the [[capitalist]] countries and making a law that every Chinese can have a handful of rice per day, thus, thwarting [[evolution]].

===Chinese Inventions===
[[File:Potn china starts televising the sunrise.jpg|right|thumb|Eat that, [[Japan|Land of the Rising Sun]].]]
[[Lie| The centuries of foreign rule over China means many inventions and achievements were made possible thanks to their foreign overlords. Were it not for their generous intervention, they'd still be living in igloos and hunting jellyfish.]] Actually, they discovered and invented a lot of cool things like paper, the printing press, silk, compasses, and most importantly gunpowder BUT the Arabs were smart enough to [[steal|burrow]] these inventions from the Chinese. They then assraped China at the Battle of Talas in 751. Then the Arabs converted the entire Central Asia to [[Islam]] and screwed China's plans at raping the shit out of the place. Then during the Crusades, the Europeans lived the raping shit out of the ME and stole the inventions from the Arabs. [[Image:Evony.jpg|thumb|Chinese contribution to the Internets...note that there are no boobs in the {{archive|akCxS|''actual''}} game. The developer is a Chinese-American and this is supposed to be a scam-knock off of Civilization, a game very popular among basement dwellers. AZNs love these games because many of them happen to be the luckless gold farmers.]] Thus the "barbarian" Europeans eventually harnessed and improve on those originally Chinese inventions to [[rape|pwn the living shit out of]]the whole world during the age of Imperialism. And even to this day, the Chinese are still butthurt over the imperialistic rape and pwnage they created an <s>[http://www.humen.com/english/info/humeninfo7-2.htm entire museum dedicated to imperialism/buttrape].</s> [[LOL|ROR]] [[404]] '''{{archive|p1qom|(Archived)}}'''

===The Great Wall of China===
[[File:China_No_Foresigners.jpg|thumb|right|Modern incarnations of the Great Wall are still prevalent throughout China.]]
[[100_years_ago|At least 100 hundred years]] ago, the Great Wall was built to stave off invading drug lords. It never actually worked, because the drug lords simply bribed the gatekeepers. They killed them too when they came through.

On the other hand, ordering that a great wall be built has turned out to be a very effective form of [[Birth control|population control]], as it is estimated that [[OVER 9000|millions of people died]] constructing the wall over the span of thousands of years and several dynasties.

On a side note, anyone who believes the myth that a 20-foot wide dirt colored wall can be seen from space is fucking retarded. See: '''{{wikilink|Great_Wall_of_China#From_low_Earth_orbit|FACT}}'''

===Later History===

[[File:Fuckingtestfrogtranks.jpg|thumb|right|Joey "Tank Man" Johnson takes his pack of tanks for a walk.]]

[[Image:InvisibleExecution.jpg|thumb|right|Invisible Execution!]]

Either China made Marco Polo famous, or Marco Polo made China famous. At any rate, now we know what to say when wandering around a dark room. China is known for contributing spaghetti ([[YA RLY]]!), deadly diseases, and useless products to the western civilization.

In the latter half of the 20th Century, China has had [[Lie|good relations]] with its neighboring country, [[Japan]]. In fact, whenever you meet a Chinese person, repeatedly refer to them as Japanese. This will ensure your ability to make many Chinese [[e-pal]]s.

Inexplicably, the Chinese also get extremely offended when they are mistaken for Taiwanese, which, technicly, they are. To [[Lulz|demonstrate your knowledge and understanding of their culture]], always be sure to tell them you are aware that [[Mexico]] is NOT part of China and is in fact an entirely different country.

Deng Xiaoping, China's version of [[Reagan]], was [[Lolwut|inscrutable]]. Was he a stalwart [[Communist]] or [[Capitalist]] reformer? Did he hate our freedom like all <s>[[Communist]]</s> [[capitalist|Capitalists]], or did he love money like a Jew?

====Chinese Imperialism:====
 
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===Great Firewall of China===
[[Last Thursday]], China embarked on a [[Epic fail|monumental project]] to [[Party Van|protect its citizens]] from the [[CP|evils]] of the [[internets]]. Called the Golden Shield project, every communication is routed through a [[Fail|government firewall]], where it is blocked if it attempts to connect to a [[No|site banned in China]]. Naturally, it [[Epic_fail|works just as well as the last Great Wall]].

P.S:
[[File:Illegal-flower-halt.jpg]]

===Unit 731===
[[File:Japanese Woman cuts off Chinese penis.gif|thumb|eight|Japanese conducted torture and mass experiments of Chinese during [[World War II]], and castrated the entire Chinese male population. Here a Japanese woman cuts off a [[Chinese]] man's [[penis]].]]
There have been countless atrocities throughout history many ignored which we can learn from but whenever you're talking a chink you'll be sure to have this mentioned. Hilariously enough many of histories atrocities were committed notoriously by the Chinese themselves including cruel Chinese emperors, Chinese imperial expansionism, Lingchi:death by a 1000 cuts, violent cultural revolutions, Chinese gulags, artificial famines, mass genocide by Mao Zedong, invading and plundering Africa and Latin America, etc.. The list could go on forever...Instead of learning from Unit 731 as a humbling experience for china to never be belligerent again. China became worse and more aggressive, now china had a reason to adopt a victim mentality(while others who have been persecuted move on)furthering their agenda for imperialism and world domination covertly. Whenever you mention any of China's bad points they will immediately BAAAWWW!!! and bring UNIT 731 up.

[[Image:Unit731-logs.jpg|thumb|left|A Unit 731 Log Inspector]]Unit 731 was a [[epic]] underground complex full of [[4chan|sekret stuffs]], and if you don't know what it is you should probably Google it, because its full of epic win and [[CP]], but to sum it up...

Unit 731 (pronounced CHING-CHONG NIP NONG NONG) was a [[Lulz|covert biological and chemical warfare]] research and development unit of the [[Sick fuck|Imperial Japanese Army]] that undertook [[Tentacle rape|lethal human experimentation]] during World War II. It was responsible for some of the most hilarious war crimes carried out by Japanese personnel, including the killing of thousands of logs.

There is some question to whether UNIT 731 was an actual event or not many times throughout history we hear a one sided story mainly told by the victors of wars and China during WW2 was part of the allied powers. Many in Japan call into question UNIT 731 as an actual event because China is known for its dubious claims especially about history. Interestingly enough many Koreans joined the Japanese when they invaded china. The Chinese are known for propaganda especially the Chinese cinema which is very famous in continent of asia and in the United States because Chinks have infested [[Hollywood]].

==Culture==

[[Image:2139_baby.jpg|thumb|Authentic Beaner food sold in the local china town in Germany.]]

[[Image:Hello_Kitty_7-11.jpg|thumb|Chinese love Slurpees and Hello Kitty all in one!]]

[[Image:Vram-Win.jpg|thumb|Kai Yat Sai, [[for great justice]].]]

While the Chinese [[government]] is surprisingly [[Atheist|non-religious]], those who are [[retarded|religious]] must adhere to one of the [[Yes|state-sanctioned]] [[religion|religions]], such as [[Buddhism]], Taoism, Confucianism, or [[Christianity]] and even they are imprisoned sometimes. Members of [[No|non-sanctioned]] religions such as Falun Gong are [[Party Van|V&]] and sent to [[Jail|correction facilities]], where their vital organs are harvested and [[Profit|sold on the black market]]. Although things are looking to change as religion is now flourishing in china.

According to [[John Lennon]], [[win|''If you go carrying pictures of Chairman Mao, you ain't gonna make it with anyone anyhow.'']]

The average Chinese is [[over 9000]]% racist. This is mainly directed at [[Blacks]], especially the Negro equivalent of the [[Mexican]], the [[Curry nigger]].. However, in all circumstances this racist rage can boil over and be directed towards anyone, especially other Chinese. This manifests itself in a variety of ways, from being admonished for tipping to throwing yourself in front of cabs otherwise the don't stop for [[Whitey]].

The average Chinese street is piled with the dead bodies of pedestrians who couldn't look both ways before crossing the street because in China that's how you yield right of way. 'THEY SAW ME. THEY SHOULD HAVE STOPPED.' [[srsly]]. Luckily dem Commies cracked down on [[IRL]] carmageddeon and now you can only hit ONE jaywalker scott free.

Average Chinese [[children]] spend [[Over_9000|up to 200%]] of their time in sweatshops. They have most likely created your shoes, braces, computers, houses, electronics and food. [[Owned|The average sweatshop laborer receives a maximum of ten grains of rice per day.]] The Chinese think that having a daughter is very unfortunate, which is obviously [[loli|wrong]]. When [[Obama]] went to China to discuss the issues the people were facing, all they could think about was the fact that he had two daughters in a row.

{{quote|You already have 2 daughters. Will you try for a third? And if it is still a daughter, what would you think about that?|Lzm048 asks [[Obama]] a hard one}}

===Food===

Many [[American]]s think of [[cock|eggrolls]], General Tsao's (or Tso's, Gau's, Zor's, Chau's) [[chicken fight|chicken]], and chop suey as Chinese food. However, all of this is untrue. "Chicken" is actually made from the stray cats in the alleys of Chinatowns while chop suey is in fact a traditional [[Armenia]]n dish popularized by the band [[System of a Down]].

To easily sum up most oriental foods, if its incredibly disgusting, rare, or endangered, they will consume it in mass quantities.

One must travel to China to find true, authentic Chinese food. Feast on such mouth-watering delicacies as:
*Everything's uterus
*Cat and Dog
*Donkey Curry
*Stinky Tofu (Odor of belly button and foot-ass)
*Beef tripe
*Fried eel
*Really expensive Pizza Hut
*Really sketchy McDonalds
*Starbucks and Kentucky Fried Chicken on every corner
*Tiger penis
*Internal Organs of [[victim complex|Persecuted]] [[fundie|Falun Gong]] followers.
*Swallow bird's nest
*Shark fin
*Chicken gizzards
*The best fake meat for vegetarians (Only at temples)
*Marinated squid and jellyfish [[tentacle rape|tentacles]]
*Roast pigeon
*Dog soup
*[[Coronavirus|Bat Soup]]
*Fried / Boiled / Raw Centipedes
*Cockroaches
*<s>[http://www.ispub.com/ostia/index.php?xmlFilePath=journals/ijto/vol2n1/eggs.xml Artificially made eggs]</s> Broke ass link '''{{archive|CScPl|(Archived)}}'''
*'''{{archive|hhK4R|Cardboard buns}}'''

The Chinese, enamored to the magical delicacy of American invented [[Slurpee]]s, have allowed Western convenience stores to infiltrate the shit hole province of Guangzhou and it's Specially Economical Zone of Shenzhen. [[Last Thursday]], thousands of [[7-11]]s sprouted up in all sizes from kiosk to full size store.

===Strange Chinese Dishes===

Some Chinese eat Baby Soup which contains a deceased human fetus and costs about $4000. Chinese eat Baby Soup to increase overall health, stamina and the power of sexual performance.

===Medicine===
Chinese medicine is based around the notion of Chi, which is complete bullshit on the order of the four humours of ancient Greek medicine. Simply wrong. Although they have some rudimentary knowledge of anatomy, it's garbled by the fact that the sole concern of Chinese medicine is the smallness of Chinese penises. For instance, Chinese medicine is certain that the kidneys have something to do with sex. This is what is going on when the Chinese doctor or apothecary suggests something to "strengthen the kidney". They are not talking about urinary function.

With the exception of acupuncture and hanging weights off your cock, Chinese medicine consists of eating, drinking, or probably snorting anything even vaguely penis-shaped or somehow related to penises in the hopes of getting a boner. Tigers are being driven extinct by the market for tiger-penis soup. Rhinoceroses are being driven extinct by the market for powdered rhino horn. Priceless dinosaur fossils are ground to powder and sold as "dragon bone". And it's all because the Chinese can't get it up, and when they do it's disappointing.

===DERRICK UH SHEE===
Chinks eat fucking everything as a delicacy. Especially human dong. The ancient Chinese proverb "Ching chong ding dong" from the Hai Chang roughly translates to "Dirty Chinaman chew this penis." Other scholars translate "chong" as "chomp" or "chow down." In fact, the term "chow down" comes from the traditional Chinese garbage soup Chao Daon. Every animal penis and every animal part is used as "medicine" in China. '''EVERY SINGLE FUCKING ONE'''. The Chinese alone keep every poacher in business worldwide. Shark fin. Rhino horn. Tiger balls. Zebra penis. Kangaroo pouch. Platypus nostrils. Orangutan fingernails. Panda liver. Porcupine lymph nodes. Elephant thyroid. Musk ox pancreas. Lion ovaries. Cheetah tear ducts. Slug semen. Electric eel stomach. Jellyfish testicles. THE CHINESE WANT TO EAT IT. NO EXCEPTIONS. The most popular menus in China are the Endangered Species Act and the IUCN Red List of Threatened Species. Melamine is another delicacy in China and they always use it in place of wheat, rice, corn, soy, milk, and baby formula. Make kidney strong like bull!

The world's largest penis museum was required by a UN treaty to be set in Reykjavík, Iceland simply to prevent the Chinese from consuming the museum's entire collection. Every museum worker at the Icelandic Phallological Museum quakes in fear when they see Chinese tourists approaching. Most museums have signs like "Do not touch" or "No leaning on the glass", but due to the Chinese, the Iceland penis museum has had to put up multiple "Do not eat" signs written in multiple variants of Chinese: Mandarin, Wu, Yue, Min, Jin, Huayu, Shanghainese, Huizhou, Gan, Xiang, Amoy, Teochew, Zhuyin fuhao, Pinyin, Xiao'erjing, Dungan, Zhongwen, Chingchong, Pingpong, Fengwang, Hoju, Heihachi, Gon, Lo Wang, etc. As a result, the Icelandic Phallological Museum has become one of the world's foremost experts on the Chinese language simply as a means of survival and continuity of operations. Plaques with pictograms meaning "do not eat penis" have also been permanently affixed in the museum. Some very rare penises are kept in a fortified basement vault with armed guards. The Iceland penis museum has considered banning all Chinese visitors, but since gooks are their major source of ticket revenue it's a catch-22. The Icelandic military's sole mission is to protect their national penis museum from Chinese tourists.

There have been multiple extinction events in the history of life on Earth, but none has been as devastating as The Chinese. China is currently Zerg rushing all land and sea animals and bioconverting them into slanteyes. For the Chinese, seeing any eyeball on another living thing that isn't constantly squinting is deeply offensive and drives their murderousness. Quite often, the Chinese instinct to violently kill everything with eyes is expressed as elementary school knife massacres, subway gas attacks, [[Virginia Tech Massacre|VTEC]], and [[Elliot Rodger|supreme gentlemen]]. Chink on chink crime can be explained by overpopulation, hunger, and self-hatred due to the medical condition Guangdong Min Dong, Latin for "Grown Man Have Baby Penis."

If you're ever walking on a beach and see some monstrous horror washed up, it is always true to say "That's a delicacy in China." If you're hitchhiking along an interstate and see two dead animals violently fused together by tires, it is always true to say "That's a delicacy in China." If you visit an abortion clinic and open a biohazard bin, it is always true to say "That's a delicacy in China." If you've ever seen a picture on the Internet of eyeball soup, it came from China. Placenta lasagna? Made in China. Fetus stew? Made in China. Penis dumplings? Made in China. Spaghetti and testicles? Made in China. THIS IS NOT A FUCKING JOKE. This no game Daniel-san, this for real.

===Morality===
Morality in China is no different from other godless ex-commie countries (like [[Russia]]). They run over their children first with a truck to soften the meat before consuming them.

'''Confucius says:''' If child is dying in agony, keep walking.

====Lying====
In Chinese culture, there is no concept that truth-telling is in itself virtuous. The Chinese feel that the only people who reflexively tell the truth are children or the mentally defective. Consequently, the Chinese lie all the time. They will lie even when it would serve them better to tell the truth, because they know that the other Chinese will assume that they are lying, so the truth would not be believed. This is the source of that famous Chinese "inscrutability". They never tell the truth about anything at all, they regard just coming out and saying what you mean as being at the very least in bad taste, so it's always a game to work out what someone is really trying to say.

====Money====
The Chinese do not regard fraud as wrong. It's just not a crime at all (rather like the way that [[muslims]] hold that [[rape]] and [[murder]] of kaffir is a non-crime). To the contrary, who a person who deceives another person is "clever" and "smart", to be praised and imitated. A person who lets themselves be deceived, particularly if money is involved, is stupid and was [[asking for it]].

Many people have pointed out that the Chinese - individually and corporately - tend to ignore intellectual property. It goes further than that: the Chinese do not regard IP as a thing at all. There is still the influence of communist philosophy, which holds that private persons cannot "own" the means of production. The Chinese are baffled by the idea that a person can have a useful, moneymaking idea and then insist that because they thought of it, the idea itself becomes theirs. To them, it's ridiculous. IP theft is not theft at all, and "Intellectual Property" is a nonsense phrase. Property is something like your shoes, maybe your house. Not an abstract thing like an idea.

====Sex====
Sexual morality in China lies at the confluence of two great streams of Chinese thought and character. Firstly, Confucianism, which holds that duty to family is the paramount virtue. Secondly, that bone deep, ineradicable Chinese avarice. In China, a young girl who is neither disrespectful nor lazy will dutifully begin bringing money into the clan as soon as it is possible to do so. And her family will of course not object to her bringing some money in exactly the same way that her mother, her sisters, and her aunts did. To the contrary - her family will [[whore]] her out the second there's fuzz on the [[vagoo|peach]]. "Mama San" is almost certainly a female relative, possibly actually the girl's mother. The Chinese will not trust any person other than close family with money.

Consequently, every Chinese woman has been a teenage whore, and every Chinese man - what in our legal system would be - a statutory rapist. It's just normal. The Chinese penis is not small at all - it's exactly the right size for fucking a 14-year-old girl.

This explains why there are so damn many Asian brothels, and why there are so damn many Chinese. The girls spend (and are expected to spend) their most fertile young years fucking for money. The bastard children become third-class members of the clan, basically slaves for life. This is the foundation of Chinese rural life, the way that China grows enough food for itself.

===Sports===
[[Image:POTN_China_Swimmers.jpg|right|thumb|Not sure if swimming or [[North Korea|Arirang Festival]].]]
The Chinese are notoriously great at martial arts, ping pong, gymnastics, figure skating, diving, synchronized diving, synchronized marching, rikshaw pulling, Qui-Gon Jinn, stuntmen and putting people before firing squads. However, their prowess in Western [[sports]] is [[Basketball|limited to the freakishly tall Yao Ming.]] The Chinese especially seem to excel at sports when the event is held in china with Chinese judges where they seem to become world champions with a history of winning consecutively. A more obvious reason behind this is the presence of a large number of Chinese labs experimenting in mixing chemical meths with steroids.

===Language===
The entire Chinese language consists of two syllables: ''[[Rosie O'Donnell|cheech]]'' and ''[[Rosie O'Donnell|chong]]''. Linguistic scholars[[[Citation_needed|''citation not needed'']]] believe this to be the origin of the term "[[Azn|Ching Chong Chinaman]]." Even to a [[Cunnilingus|cunning linguist]] who sees differences with types of words, even with the approximately five different tone inflections, there still is an irritatingly huge number of homophones. Fortunately, lulz can be harvested; the symbol for slave [[pimp|looks like the symbol of a woman near the symbol of a right hand]], and the literal translation for their name of Africa, fei zhou, is "wrong continent". Not necessarily ugly, but the Chinese language generally sounds like cats trying to imitate a drum set.

This explains the non-stop, cacophonous jibber-jabber so typical of any crowd of Chinese. 90% of the noise is "what?", "what did you say?", backtracking and correcting the hilarious misunderstandings, and arguing at cross-purposes.

The most useful Chinese words are 不要 ( buyao / búyào ) Roughly pronounced boo-yow with a falling inflection it means "[[DO NOT WANT]]" ([[srsly]]) and is used by yelling it at the [[Assholes|Chinese]] trying to electrocute you in the subway/ take your picture/ sell you crap/ selling sex from weird massage parlors/ begging for money/ asking if you're a wrestler/ being racist at you. More useful words are 出口 (Chūkǒu) pronounced chew-kow and means "Exit." This can be used to your advantage as most exits anywhere in China or china-adjacent are brightly marked with Coat Rack/T.V. for speedy escape from thundering hordes of Chinese bent on taking everything nice from you while rejecting such foreign concepts such as "lining up" or "personal space".

The Chinese language does not have tenses in it, which is why all the food is raw. It's impossible to asked for "cooked" meat - meat that was being cooked in the recent past but is now no longer being cooked. It's also impossible to ask for "boiled water" - water which has been boiled but is now no longer hot. In Chinese, the water either is or is not boiling. This is why bottled water - "water in a bottle" - is the only way to get safe drinking water and is responsible for a great deal of waste.

On the other hand, people who natively speak languages like this routinely make better long-term decisions than those who speak languages with tenses. It seems there us an up-side to not being able to put worries off until tomorrow.

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===List of Chinese Pastimes===
[[File:Chinese Panda Dog.jpg|thumb|[[Sparkledogs|Painted dogs]]: so much easier than saving the [[Panda]].]]
[[Image:From_nikonfans.jpg|thumb|Picture from a typical Chinese website, advertising for a restaurant.]]
[[Image:Abortionlol.gif|thumb|Japanese soldier solving overpopulation.]]

*Pretending to give two shits about the environment
*Attempting to piss off [[Americans]] (but failing at it)
*Playing "which button makes the nuke explode?" (for nobles only)
*Opening Chinese restaurants
*[[Kung fu]]
*Exporting Chinese whores to spread disease in other countries and regions like North America, Western Europe, Russia, Israel and Japan
*Speaking [[Engrish]]
*Playing '[[Where's Waldo?]]: China', which is far more difficult than other versions because all chinese people look the same
*Making [[McDonald's]] Happy Meal toys
*Working at the local [[Wal-Mart]]
*Manufacturing [[SARS]] (and possibly other deadly diseases for export to the rest of the world)
*Stealing American and European [[job]]s through outsourced [[slave]] labor.
*Chinese fire drills
*Traveling overseas as tourists to Europe, Canada, Australia and America and pissing off the locals.
*Killing and eating babies.
*Violating quarantine laws in other countries by smuggling items like dead cat heads or diseased plants through the border.
*Smuggling heroin to other countries.
*Sticking it to the [[White]] [[The Man|Man]]
*Playing ping pong
*[[World of Warcraft|Farming Gold]]
*Spitting on sidewalks
*Picking their flat noses.
*Scaring America with [[communism]] and failing at it!
*Scaring America with [[capitalism]] with massive success
*Engineering man-made viruses such as SARS and the Avian Flu in hopes of thinning out their population by 75%.
*[[win|Executing people for simply having any kind of religious faith which is considered a "threat to national security"]]
*Executing political prisoners and then charging the deceased's families for the cost of the bullets
*[[Death penalty|Executing people in general]]
*[[Pwn|Running people over with tanks]]
*Having the filthiest and most polluted environment in the world
*Having filthy living standards
*Bragging about their massive arsenal but most of their weapons are faulty and used for propaganda purposes
*Framing Tibetan monks for "bomb plots" and then promptly executing them
*[[Awesome|Holding the record for THE most murderous regime in all of human history, having murdered over 250,000,000 people]]
*Murdering people who claim to have cured [[cancer]]
*Kidnapping and [[Murder|murdering]] people to harvest their organs
*Having [[Capitalism|no safety and sanitation laws]]
*[Romance of the Three Kingdoms|Being a true hero of the Three Kingdoms!]]
*Telling stories around the labor-campfire

===[[I accidentally X|Accidents]]===

[[Image:Chines.jpg|thumb|right|Me so horrny! Me ruvv you rong time!.]]
[[Image:Fetus_soup_2.jpg|thumb|right|Chinese eat human fetus to "increase" their sexual performance.]]

According to a [[shit nobody cares about|report]] [[over 9000|at least 100,000,000]] Chinese died in accidents in 2007, this is a dramatic 10% drop from the previous year. Some officials cite less hazards in the workplace such as two inspections per year rather than just one, a [[doing it wrong|gun]] to encourage factory workers to do it right, and signs that replace 'do <s>not</s> touch this' with images of [[buttsecks|smiley communist pandas describing what can happen with images of a mangled worker]]. 

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== Education ==

China is known to have one of the worst fucking education systems in history, with the famous "Gaokao" exam that determines whether or not one's going to be an underpaid factory worker.

==U.S.-China Relations==
The Chinese word for [[America]] is 美國, pronounced meiguo, a transliteration which means literally "beautiful country". This would seem to be overtly flattering; however, the first character 美 (mei), though it does mean beautiful, is a vertical combination of the characters 大 (da) and 羊 (yang), meaning, respectively, "large" and "sheep".

The contrast between the conspicuous "beautiful" and the subtler "big sheep" contains a hidden truth and tells you everything you need to know about China's [[Rich_and_beautiful|public]] versus [[Dumbass|private]] opinions of [[Americunts|America and Americans]]. Rightly so. It is also well known China is slowly taking over the world. Most Experts suggest that they will make their move when America collapses, some think it is when they finally figure out how to open their eyes.

[[Image:OlympicLesbianAssFingering.jpg|thumb|400px|center|American Ali Bernard [[asking for it|getting raped in the ass]] by Chinese Wang Jiao.Typical Chink unsportsmanlike behavior.]]

==How to Troll the Chinese==

*Point out the many, many times the Great Wall failed them.
*Mention the period of Mongolian foreign rule
*Tell them the Manchu ran their country better than they ever did
*Predict that India will surpass them
*Claim that Western and Japanese corporations will sue their economy into oblivion.
*Support Tibetan freedom
*Support Uighur separatism
*Support Hong Kong democracy
*Support Taiwan
*Yell "TAIWAN NUMBA WAN!"
*Buy Taiwanese goods.
*Tell them that Taiwan is, in fact, a country.
*Tell them [[Lmao Zedong|Mao]] killed more people by accident than [[Adolf Hitler|Hitler]] and [[Rainbow Stalin|Stalin]] could on purpose.
*Tell them [[North Korea]] will betray them sooner or later.
*Tell them the [[Rape|Nanjing massacre]] never happened and the Japs [[dindu nuffin]].
*Tell them Chinese people are Southeast Asia's best-selling product
*Calling everything Chinese things "支那(Zhina)"—people, games, language...
*Claim that another Century of Humiliation is coming.
*Make fun of their attempts at hegemony.
*Make fun of their military
*Say they'll never get control of the Easter and South China Sea
*Tell them Japan will recover and outdo them.
*Tell them Confucius was full of shit.
*Ask them why Sun Tzu couldn't be bothered to write more.
*Remind them [[America|who]] saved their tiny asses in [[World War 2]]
*Diss communism
*Send them this:
{{quote|"动态网自由门天安門天安门法輪功李洪志 Free Tibet 六四天安門事件 The Tiananmen Square protests of 1989 天安門大屠殺 The Tiananmen Square Massacre 反右派鬥爭 The Anti-Rightist Struggle 大躍進政策 The Great Leap Forward 文化大革命 The Great Proletarian Cultural Revolution 人權 Human Rights 民運 Democratization 自由 Freedom 獨立 Independence 多黨制 Multi-party system 台灣臺灣 Taiwan Formosa 中華民國 Republic of China 西藏土伯特唐古特 Tibet 達賴喇嘛 Dalai Lama 法輪功 Falun Dafa 新疆維吾爾自治區 The Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Region 諾貝爾和平獎 Nobel Peace Prize 劉暁波 Liu Xiaobo 民主言論思想反共反革命抗議運動騷亂暴亂騷擾擾亂抗暴平反維權示威游行李洪志法輪大法大法弟子強制斷種強制堕胎民族淨化人體實驗肅清胡耀邦趙紫陽魏京生王丹還政於民和平演變激流中國北京之春大紀元時報九評論共産黨獨裁專制壓制統一監視鎮壓迫害侵略掠奪破壞拷問屠殺活摘器官誘拐買賣人口遊進走私毒品賣淫春畫賭博六合彩天安門天安门法輪功李洪志 Free Tibet 劉曉波动态网自由门}}
This will instantly boot them from whatever platform you sent it to them through it and will get them sent to a Maoist gulag [[IRL]] where [[Bubba|Bubba Bing Dong]] will stuff them full of [[Cock|chopsticks]]

==Actually other Asian countries hates china==
In fact, other Asian countries also hate China. Chinese bastards are ruining the image of Asians. In particular, [[Good Korea]], [[Japan]], [[Taiwan]], [[Hong Kong]], [[Singapore]],
[[Vietnam]], [[Indonesia]], [[Phillipines]], [[Malaysia]] are the most hated for China. They all want to [[Genocide|massacre]] the Chinese

==Gallery==
 
{{cg|Gallery|chinaGallery|center|<gallery>
Image:Chinaiswin.jpg|"Foorish imperiarists. China wins this round."
Image:WasntChicken.jpg|An all-too-common experience.
Image:MAN FUK.jpg|Typical Chinese taxi driver. [[Rape]] is imminent.
Image:Doge dies.gif|China kills [[Doge]]
Image:HamsterDance.jpg|The [[old meme|only English website allowed in China]].
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:madpwnt.gif|Foothurt
Image:Everyformrape.jpg|It comes in different flavors!
Image:Translateservererror.jpg|Chinese trying to put up a sign in [[Engrish|English]].
Image:Pedo_only9.jpg|Even [[Pedobear]] put in an application.
Image:Edison-chen-cecelia-cheung-gillian-chung-02a.jpg|Chinaman [[Edison Chen]] getting his dick licked before having it chopped off. Notice Pedobear is present.
Image:Death_Train.JPG|The Chinese have trains now.
Image:All_look_same.jpg|The Chinese Council disapprove of your shenanigans. You better believe that'll result in a lower social credit score
Image:Edison-chen-09.jpg|Chinaman [[Edison Chen]] eating cunt, once his dick was removed by Gillian's teeth.
Image:Azian.jpg|Typical Chinese Beauty.
Image:Penis.jpg|Traditional Chinese toothbrush
Image:popstation.JPEG|China's amazing [[Fail|originality]].
File:Big shit.jpg
Image:ChineseSOB.png|Those Chinese sons of a bitches are going down.
Image:Forbid.jpg|Shut up.
Image:ChinasRedArmyFly2.jpg|Great Firewall of China...more like great faggotwall, amirite?
Image:TankManHacker.jpg|China's hackers on steroids can block tanks. Who knew?
Image:Gungagalunga.jpg|Even drunken louts can share in the wisdom of the Dali Lama.
Image:Soup_3.jpg|China is full of sick fucks.
Image:Chinese_fetus.jpg|China's so called "beautiful" culture.
Image:Chinese_execution.jpg|Example of the government benefits the Chinese can expect.
Image:Cunt_examination.jpg|Nice use of +1,000 year old Anglo-Saxon terminology.
Image:Skidknee.jpg|Azns are known to want it [[up the butt]].
Image:Wtfisthislee.jpg|Bruce Lee is not amused.
Image:Chinese_dude.jpg|OH, I SEE A COCK.
Image:Jimbo in red.jpg|The future of U.S.-China relations.
Image:China mad.jpg|Don't fuck with China.
Image:Chinese_babies.jpg|Space exploration propaganda, or solution to [[over_9000|massive population]]?
Image:China_segways.jpg|China's nerd patrol.
Image:Taiwan.jpg|Delicious Chinese food.
Image:Toy dead cat.jpg|The chinese [[hate|loooooooove]] cats.
Image:stonerchan.png|Stoner Chan, brother of Jackie Chan. Master of Stoner Kung Fu.
Image:China_-_Negotiations.jpg|Chinese hostage negotiator at work.
File:POTN China Wheelchair.jpg
File:ChinawomenridesPWC.jpg|Fucking white guys is a typical freetime actitvity of an average Chinawoman
File:Grocery_Gross_Dog_Heads.jpg|Typical Chinese cuisine.
File:Grocery_Gross_Tuna_Eye.jpg|How about some dessert?
File:ChinaGathersForUSDebt.jpg
File:Chinaownsyoubitch.jpg
File:Veryhotchinesechick.jpg|Very hot chinese chick
File:Anasianslut.gif
File:Kai-Lan.png|Your typical Chinese cartoon girl.
File:GookGirlTongTongWu.jpg|Typical Chinese woman named [[LOL|Tong Tong Wu]]
File:A young Chinese woman.jpg
File:JadeKush.jpg
</gallery>}}
 
==See Also==
*[[Anti-CNN]]
*[[Afghanistan]]
*[[Asia]]
*[[Azn]]
*[[Chyna]]
*[[China Guy]]
*[[Communism]]
*[[COVID-19]]
*[[Death Van]]
*[[Eingee.com]]
*[[India]]
*[[Indonesia]]
*[[Malaysia]]
*[[Singapore]]
*[[Human flesh search engine]]
*[[Japan]]
*[[Kazakhstan]]
*[[Mizhi County No. 3 Middle School Attack]]
*[[North Korea]]
*[[Olympic Flame]]
*[[Pakistan]]
*[[Russia]]
*[[Taiwan]]
*[[Tajikistan]]
*[[Tibet]]
*[[Vietnam]]
*[[Wang Jeu|Wang Jew]]

==External links==
*'''{{archive|jxQ4E|Chinese Habbo Hotel closed permanently thanks to AIDS.}}'''
*'''{{archive|l6CJR|Chinese sell couches labeled as nigger-brown.}}''' At last, a quality product.
*[https://www.wired.com/2010/04/google-china-and-censorship-a-wiredcom-faq/ '''Fired !'''] ''from Google - what did you expect, you honorable imperialist cunt ?''
*[https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0006QY4WS Ways that are dark.] A fine book on China from the 1930's. Available on Amazon, because I'm sure good people like you would never just find a free copy on the web.

{{azn}}
{{commonwealth}}
{{Takedown}}
{{Unitedstates}}
{{Qing}}

[[Category: Locations]]

China

2026-05-15T13:58:25Z

Gooksu: /* Military */

{{spoiler|CHINESE CAN HAVE <s>TWO</s> THREE KIDS NOW! LET THE CHINK FUCKATHON BEGIN}}
 
{{Offended}}
 
<center>[[File:ED-China-Flag.png|350px|link=]][[Image:TibetFlag.png|350px|link=]]
China's National Flags</center>
 
[[File:Chinesewomanatwork.gif|thumb|What Chinese women do best.]]
[[File:Real map of China.jpg|right|300px]]
[[Image:Chinese_Roller_Coaster.jpg|thumb|Riding a roller coaster into a [[AIDS|baby formula]] processing facility.]]
[[Image:Preasetoshowpapers.jpg|thumb|YOU NO HAVE RIGHTS HERE WHITE DEVIR (and neither do we, tee hee!)]]
[[File:blaxygirls.jpeg|thumb|Only approved K-Pop group in China because of [[moonspeak|秦香莲三十二岁那状告当朝驸马郎欺君王瞒皇上悔婚男儿招东床]].]]

Meet the only race [[Divide by 0|that can out-Jew]] a Jew (without being or having jews). '''China''', known to many of its inhabitants as the [[hubris|center of the world]] [[shit nobody cares about|(in Chinese, China is 中国 [zhongguo] which literally means "center country")]],or [[Mordor|Middle Kingdom]] (or the asian version of [[US]] for the rest of the world) is a giant industrial park in [[Asia]]. It has [[OVER 9000|so many people]] that they've instituted a [[Dead babies|One-child policy]]. One of Amurka's [[Walmart|largest trading partners]], China has been known to export [[Lulz|defective and dangerous products]], an unfortunate result of their religious adherence to their retarded [[Capitalism|"manufacture uber-cheap, sell uber-cheap, FUCK EVERYTHING ELSE, CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP"]] universal manufacturing standards that the US still loves to buy.

It is also very important to note that the [[moonspeak|Engrish]] manuals that Chinese products come with are, for the most part, examples of the greatest heights of Engrish grammar and prose. They're so great, in fact, most people would feel their head aching on reading the first few lines, while others feel a sudden urge to hurt someone. Also, [[some argue]] that the Chinese are [[Lolwut|inscrutable]]. [[Eurofags|Others]] would say [[Americunts]] are shitting their pants when hearing of the country.

{{quote|The only good Chink is a dead Chink.|[[common knowledge]]}}

One may refer to the people of China by many names, including:

*Pre-viral lifeform
*[[Oriental]]
*Chinaman or Chinawoman
*Chiggers (Chink + nigger)
*Rice niggers
*Chink
*Chiamese
*Chine
*Chino
*Ching Chong
*[[Taiwan]]ese
*[[Asia|Gooks]]
*Jackie Chan (Fact: Every Chinaman is Jackie Chan or an impersonator of him.)
*The Jews of Asia
*The country that [[buttrape]]d the US economy without lube (in sweety dreams of Eurofags)
*Asian [[Jews|Hebrews]]. For reference, [[Japanese]] are [[Nazi|Germans]], [[Indonesia|Austro]][[Malaysia|nesians]] are Black South Africans and Arabs, [[Koreans]] are [[Palestine|Palestinians]], [[Communists|Southeast Asians]] (Mainlanders) are [[Slav|Eastern Europeans]] and the Filipinos are Mexicans
*[[Chris-chan|Vagina]]

==Yellow soup==
[[Image:Spreadem.jpg|thumb|[[Over 9,000]] years of Chinese wisdom has much to teach us.]]
[[Image:ZhWikipediaLiuxinyu970226.png|thumb|Typical Wikipedia userpage of a PRC nationalist.]]

Ancient Chinese secret! Yellow soup is shit soup! [[Wikipedia:Fecal bacteriotherapy|China invent]]. Bery good. You food poison? You diarrhea so bad? Eat shit [[Brb, soup|soup]]! Eat my [[shit]]! China know for 4th century! Steel after twelve hunderd year [[Fact|Li Shizhen use shit soup treat bad abdomen]]! True story! Make stomach strong! Chinese medicine work! No listen Western medicine! So stupid! Bad for you! Antibiotic make superbug! Western medicine make superbug bad for you! Shit soup is answer! Shit soup is golden syrup!

[[Image:China map.jpg|thumb|The map of China. See the non-white space? THAT'S China!!!]]

'''Recipe for shit soup''': I shit bowl, just add water. You drink! Drink up! Is cure for you! Fresh soup bery hot. No bowl? I shit in mouth! No die diarrhea. No die dysentery. Shit soup good for all things! Drink my shit! Cure autoimmune disease! Cure fatness! Cure diabetes! Cure MS! Cure Parkinsons! China know cure for century! You have cholera? You have typhoid fever? You have plague? Eat shit or die! Animal shit good also. Camel shit work also. [[Nazi]] soldier in [[Africa]] know this! Why you think [[dog]] eat shit? Even dog know this! Dog know more than Western doctor!

Warning! Not all shit good for eat. No shit from sick person. Bad shit. Bad shit make sick, good shit make well. So simple! Need good shit. Shit healthy person. [[Truth|FDA agree]]! [[Fact|Human shit experimental drug since 2013]]! Donate at shit bank! China know for century. My shit good. You eat! You drink! Drink my shit! Good for you! China #1 exporter good shit! My shit medicine for you! No like shit soup? I shit, I freeze dry, put in pill, you eat! Shit pill cure you! Shit pirr cure famiry! I prescribe shit pill for you! Eat my shit dayree! Home remedy prepare for sickness: healthy person shit, store in freezer. Illness? Eat own good shit. No lie! No freezer no problem. Warm fresh shit often best medicine! China cure epidemic! Try many shit over many year. Have [[Ebola]]? Eat shit person survive Ebola. So easy. Many animal eat dung. Animal more wise than Western doctor! Panda elephant hippo koala all eat mother shit. China know shit. Shit soup best medicine. So wise Panda. Thank you Panda teach China.

==Chinese People==

[[File:Meanwhile... in china.jpg|thumb|Meanwhile, in China...]]

Many have pondered the [[Sex|reason for China's incredible population size]], only to be baffled by the obvious [[ugly|ugliness]] of the [[women]], but chinese men are much ulgier. The [[UK|United Kingdom's]] greatest [[philosopher]], Prince Philip, declared Chinese women to be the "[[Fugly|ugliest in the world]]". Out of all types of [[azn]], chinks are by far the ugliest. Only 1 person out of every 1,000 people born of the abominable Chinese race is worth looking at.

[[image:Kinkajou_Chinkajou.jpg|thumb|There IS a difference.]]

The Chinese population has more than doubled, from 563 million in 1950 to over 1.3 billion in 2005. This makes the Communist Party's Republic of China severely overpopulated. As such, the Chinese Communist Party has mastered the art of sacrificing Chinese people with campaigns like the Great Leap Forward (1959–1961),[[I did it for the lulz|which killed 30-40 million people, and the Cultural Revolution
(1966–1976) with 7–8 million casualties.]] Also the first Chinese sport is Nikes manufacturing.

[[File:Chinese kid stomping on Japanese flag.jpg|thumb|left|300px|How the Chinese show their love for Japan.]]

The Han Chinese are proud of their ancient heritage of being ruled over by foreigners during non-Chinese dynasties like the British Empire who pwned their way into Hong Kong with LULZ.

Despite the big cultural and linguistic diversity in China, they try to maintain the homogeneous population myth, and [[Liberal|lay claim to lands that historically never belonged to China proper (e.g. Taiwan)]].

Much like niggers with their basketball, spics with their menial labor and whites with their faggotry, chiggers (aka Rice Niggers) have their own special array of talents. At a young age, many boys are forced to engage in a life of studying the Confucian rites and being able to apply all that bullshit to the math and physics they're forced to cram for on a study night.

[[image:ChineseFemale.png|thumb|A typical Chinese female.]]
[[image:domathfast.jpg|thumb|Another typical Chinese [[math]] plantation.]]
[[Image:Crazyasianlady.jpg|thumb|Chinese women are known for their unique beauty and intelligence.]]

China actually had a interesting culture 100 years ago. But like everything else, Japanese culture invaded and now Chinese also have to display the peace sign in every photograph they take. Nowadays, Chinese people copy from American, European and Japanese culture. China [[b/|no longer displays original content]].

The Chinese countryside is dotted with sweatshops full of [[loli|child laborers]]. It is said that the sound of their shoemaking can be heard from Mars. However, the years of labor they endure is all worth it, as on payday they are each given a small sum of sand and a handful of dog hairs.

Exactly 100% of Chinamen spend most of their lives as slaves in math plantations.

*To be honest and frank, have you ever met a worthy Chinaman? Hmm? No? Didn't think so...

===National Anthem===
 
{{frame|<youtube>Qv9wk5lgGFo</youtube>|border=yellow|background=red|margin=auto}}
 
===Chinese Hobbies===
[[File:Asianlolz.jpg|thumb|Get your own chinky-eye grasses; hurry up whire suppries rast!]]
[[File:JONES_vs_CHINKS.gif|thumb|Dr. Jones demonstrates the correct way to handle a Chinese chinamen, they ''no rikey''.]]

*Inspecting [[cunts]] through voyeurism.
*Pretending not to speak English
*Chopping off peoples penises to get eunuchs.
*Eating anything that moves and shitting epidemics. See [[SARS]] and [[AIDS]].
*Shouting in loud, annoying voices with a horrible sounding language.
*Preparing for sweatshop work at age 3.
*Wishing their dicks were bigger.
*Manufacturing inscrutably low-quality, knock-off products that break upon use.
*Manufacturing malfunctioning weapons to other countries who are at war with each other only to make money. See [[Russia]] and [[USA]].
*Doing [[math]].
*Playing [[Genshin Impact]] and trying to have sex
*Butchering the English language by trying to adopt [[Ebonics]].
*Counter-Racism
*Being just like [[Jews]]
*Farming virtual [[World of Warcraft|gold]] to sell to [[basement dwellers]].
*Surpassing the [[The Jewnited States of Americunts|U.S.]] as being the most environmentally-destructive, air and water-polluting nation on the planet.
*Hating [[Niggers]] better than [[americunts]] (especially the [[India|Curry Nigger]] and [[Indonesia|Shore Nigger]])
*Sending butthurt, stupid, smelly Indonesian Muslims to help the Jew-sent, Syrian Rapefugees rape Europe to death.
*Taking a shit in holes
*Standing on toilet bowls to shit
*Shitting in another country
*Justify the meaning of"支那"
*Being nippy
*[https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2867219/Inside-Chinese-fur-farms-breed-raccoon-dogs-tiny-cages-skin-alive-make-luxury-coats-sold-West.htmll Skinning animals alive]
*Videotape [[Wang Jue|themselves]] crushing cats to death for [[sick fuck|fap material]].
*Use shitty carcinogenic '''{{ytlink|e7S7r31cjAQ|gutter oil}}''' to cook noodles and sell them on the streets.

=== 2008 Beijing Orimpics ===

Main article: [[LOLympic Games]] 

[[Image:OrympicShoopSinger.jpg|thumb|China's amazing Shoop-da-Mexican, used to make Mexicans from nothing. [[Pedobear|PEDOBEAR]] APPROVES.]]

[[Image:Happy Happy Happy.jpg|thumb|A typical slave to the Dalai Lama.]]

[[Image:TeamBWWOOOOONG.jpg|thumb|Team China has their eyes on the ball...and the gold.]]

Beijing was fortunate enough to <strike>win</strike> purchase the bid for the 2008 Orimpic Games, and they have delivered on a promise to give the world an amazing competition.

The August 8th Opening Ceremony of the Orimpics started off with a bang. The nation that invented fireworks gave the world the most impressive display of photoshopped fireworks ever seen. The fun did not stop there; after ¥1 Billion Renminbi and years of hard work, Chinese computer engineers managed to create a program able to shoop an attractive child over an [[ugly]] child with talent.

As the Orimpics got underway, Team China dominated the in the child labor competition, winning the gold with two of the youngest loli to have ever competed. It wasn’t long before everyone was asking how China managed to train some of the best underage athletes in the world. The Chinese reveled their forced labor training camps where loli are selected at the tender age of 3 for rigorous training in making high quality Nikes and lead-covered sports equipment for other teams. (Team Wal-Mart was disappointed in the Chinese decision to reveal secret training exercises.)

While performing well in the child labor competition, the U.S.of fucking A. try-hard "Redeem "Shitfaced" Team" has hurt China's chances of earning the gold in the Orimpic Basketball Tournament. However, hopes still ride on Yao Ming to bring home a metal. The Chinese state-sponsored coaching staff hopes by training Ming into the ground and destroying his career as a basketball player, they will be victorious in earning the gold for Team China. In a statement to the press Ming said, "If I don' bring home the gorrd they wirr kirr my famiry and reprace me wit any one of severar mirrions erigibre Chinese basketba' praya." You can bet that Ming's famiry will be cheering for him during the games.

China did however excel in spitting, bottle peeing, and shitting in holes. Unfortunately, none of these activities are recognized Olympic events. Regardless, the Chinese moved forward, with each day in the events producing more spit, urine and feces than one could ever have possibly imagined. These events climaxed with the closing ceremonies, where Chinese performers ended the games with a series of enormous bowl movements, the drowning of several Chinese "dissidents" in a spit / urine pool, and a secondary invasion of Taiwan.

The Chinese government broadcast the events on live TV, then quickly denied the incident ever occurred, right after calling Google to ask for another "favor".

[[Image:Kexin platinum.jpg|thumb|400px|center|[[In_Soviet_Russia...|In Communist China]], loli destroys [https://nastialiukin.com/ ''your''] life.]]

===Things They Don't Want You to Know===
[[File:Chinese claw machine.jpg|thumb|right|100% of China's youth are chain smokers.]]
*Fact: China's National Motto? China: The Land of Spit and Tobacco.
*Fact: Chinese city workers can't dig up roads to repair pipe systems as the natural instinct for a Chinese person when they see an open hole in the ground is to shit in it. It is estimated that the Chinese population could fill the Grand Canyon is less than three minutes.
*Fact: Anything a Chinese person can pee in WILL be peed in. Example: empty water bottles, plastic sandwich baggies, purses, the pocket of a stranger, rectums, vaginas, open sewers (AKA: China)
*Fact: Chinese pussy is hairy and sideways.
*Fact: China almost got nuked in the Sino-Soviet border conflict.
*Fact: Chinese [[women]] have small [[breasts]]. Any Chinese [[women]] you see with normal or large breasts has implants. The [[men]], like all [[azn|asians]], have small [[penis|penises]].
*Fact: The [[ED]] website is not censored in China.
*Fact: Chinese families name their newborn babies by gathering their whole family together and smash glass plates on the floor.
*Fact: The Chinese take pleasure in gobbing on pavements, in restaurants and on each other for that matter. This frequent transfer of bodily fluids is considered more effective in getting woman pregnant. Even children, amirite?
*Fact: What the fuck is a [[Taiwan]]?

===Chinese Childcare===

Children in China are treated like crap. They are either eaten as a staple food, chained to posts like animals and/or brutally molested as a sport. Those "lucky" enough to survive till the age of 3 are given the privilege of being [[socialism|socially sold]] into mandatory slavery for the greater glory of the country in a sweatshop.

{{cg|Chinklets||center|<gallery perrow="6">
Image:Fetus soup 2.jpg|Fetuses are often revered as a Chinese delicacy.
Image:BabyDog.jpg| "HOW FAR CAN I GO ON CHAIN?"
Image:ChineseCarryOut.jpg|--Ancient traditional Chinese method of [[child abuse|transportation]].-- Actually, the baby in the plastic bag is actually a picture taken in [[good Korea]]
Image:Catburger.jpg
Image:China_-_Raw_Puppy_Eats.jpg
Image:Babysoup5.jpg|Yummy!
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="6">
</gallery>
|}}

[[PROTIP]]: Google "Chen Chuanliu".

Chinese babies don't wear diapers, as they're far too expensive for 3rd world bordering chinky chip slave laborers only making 10 cents an hour to churn out [[Apple]] and [[My Little Pony]] crap. As such parents rely on "split pants", letting the child just shit and piss all over the floor and themselves. As a result, most chinklets are treated like animals and caged or tied up outdoors. The "split pants" also offer a unique "double feature" in that it allows for "easy access" to China-men who recreationally molest young children, which is in fact a national sport in China.

{{cg|Split Pants||center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:China_-_Split_Pants_-_01.jpg
Image:China_-_Split_Pants_-_02.jpg
Image:China_-_Split_Pants_-_03.jpg
Image:China_-_Split_Pants_-_04.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
</gallery>
|}}

===Famous Chinese===
#[[Confusion|Confucius]]
#Winnie the Pooh
#Lin Zhong Min
#Guan Yin
#[[Kill Bill|Pai Mei]]
#Bruce Lee (and clones Bruce Li, Bruce Lei, Blues Ree etc)
#Christopher Lee
#[[Pokemon|Hitmonlee]]
#[[Pokemon|Hitmonchan]]
#[[Pokemon|Hitmontop]]
#Mao Ze [[loldongs|Dong]]
#[[Kill Bill|O-ren Ishii]]
#[[Elliot Rodger]]
#Zhang Zongchang (AKA Dogmeat General, Infamous Warlord who made a tons of lulzy Poems, Seriously. Look em up.)
#Yao Ming
#Ho-Ming Mee Sao
#Wang Wei (The pilot who took down an American plane and made them apologize)
#Ming The Merciless
#Fu Manchu
#Yin-Yang Twins
#Lao Tse
#[[Goatse|Goa Tse]]
#[[Edison Chen]] (the hero with many jpegs to back him up)
#David Carradine
#Ms. Wang ([https://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/17/us/17student.html Infamous traitor of China that was exposed by the Internet and the New York Times])
#Sum-ting Wong
#Wi-tu Lo
#Hoo-lee Fuk
#Bang-ding Ow
#O-chin Chin
#Lu-Bu
#Lu-Wi
#Helen Yoo
#Long-Ho
#Hu-Dat
#Jackie Chan
#Chris Rock
#Donnie Yen
#Stephen Chow
#Ching Chong
#Cheng Chang
#Peter Chao (The guy who rubbed his own crap on a building)
#Kim Jung Il
#That white guy from Kung Pow
#[[Bill Clinton]]
#[[Chuck Norris]]
#[[Belgium|Jean Claude Van Damme]]
#[[Kevin Rudd]]
#Long Le
#Steven Segal
#[[Street Fighter|Chun-Li]]
#William Hung
#William Fu
#Jason Statham
#Jet Li
#[[Pokemon|Brock]]
#Yung Shin Boys
#[[Michael Phelps]]
#Lo Wang (Fictional character from Shadow Warrior, made by the same guys that made [[Duke Nukem 3D]].)
#Wei Shen (Protagonist of Sleeping Dogs, Made by the same guys behind the True Crime series.)
#[[Pwnt|Dalai Lama]]
#[[Christopher Walken]]
#[[hippy|Tommy Chong]]
#Hu Flung Dung
#Adolf Hitler
#[[George Bush]]
#[[The Matrix|Agent Smith]]
#[[Geert Wilders]]
#Wu Tang Clan
#[[Batman|Mr. Lau]]
#[[You|Yu]]
#Wowkie Zhang
#Pagan Min (The faggy antagonist of [[Far Cry|Far Cry 4]].)
#[[Touhou|Hong Meiling]]
#[[RWBY|Yang Xiao Long]]
#[[John Cena|John Xina]]
#[[Dwayne Johnson|The Wok]]

==Government==

[[Image:ChinasRedArmyFly1.jpg|thumb|HOLY SHI- They can FLY?]]

<s>One of the few remaining [[Communist]] regimes in the world, China's leader is always a member of the Communist Party of China.</s> China is now "[[Socialist]]". While the Democratic Party of China, founded in 1998, tried to make a go of it, their leaders were [[Pwnt|promptly detained]] and sent to [[Holocaust|"correction facilities"]].

[[Fascist|President]] Hu Jintao, when he's not busy stomping on kittens, has overseen the rise of China from a third world nation to an [[Wal-Mart|economic superpower]] (but still third world nation). lulwut? Open mouth insert truck of cocks you dumb piece of shit, after the Hilarious Chinacost that oldskool commies unleashed during the Cultural Revolution it was for Deng Xiao Ping to divert the chinacide to what outcummed as an economic development, hence, China finally stopped sucking cock and became [[Wal-Mart|economic superpower]]. There is more to that, If you weren't smoking pot during Elmo Street, you'd know that during WWII China got raeped hard by the Japan niggaz. Back then Commies were nothing but your average Fallout 3 wastelander hobos, living on sucking Russia's delicious cock, Republic of China with Chiang Kai-shek as the Leader owned the street cred in the back days.
[[Image:Chinamastercard.jpg|thumb|Chinese Electricians]] So, when Japz went partying hard at Shanghai and especially at Nanking, Commies and Kuominttangs didn't give a flying fuck and continued to saw out each other. Eventually they "united" and fought back. Little did they know, that after the war, casualties were counted and bricks of uranium were said to be shat, for it turned out, that the Japz lost hardly 1.3 million samurais, 700 000 of which were ass fucked as POW's by glorious IVAN's army in Korea, and China managed to get their dicks cut by 30 000 000 (thirty million) people. 1.3 million to 30 millions, kinda tells a lot 'bout chinese army, amirite. So, after the war ended, Chinks had a small civil war between Commies and Kuomintang ended with Chiang Kai-shek GTFO to Taiwan with all the gold and hookers, thus on 1st October of 1949 People's Republic of China was born. USSR, UK, even Germany were quickly recovering form WWII, but China was still in mid 16th century, having no industry, no telecom and no 4chan, but as they were commies they pledged for some hard soviet cock in their tight azn pussies and so a glorious path to Prosperity began. [[File:Chink government.jpg|right|300px]] To cut a long story short, Chinks got a fuckton of OIL in factories, telecom, 2ch, 4ch, Chris Hansen, education and even nukes from USSR, 'till Stalin decided to GTFO forever, with Khurshev being Steve Ballmer, Mao got pissed with USSR, they even attacked USSR's border posts in 1969 scoring some frags. And there was but one country, that rejoiced at such an outcome - the US of A. Back in China with no Soviet cock, commie leaders initiated Chinacide, so when Deng Xiao Ping finally got some street cred, he had a fucking great Idea - If we can't have some delicious Soviet Penis, we could ask for PHAT AMERICUNT DONGS in our asses, as it happened with President Nixon's Shocking visit to PRC in 1973. Which brings us to the beggings - Deng Xiao Ping is responsible for China's economic growth and the fact, that China WILL ALWAYS CRAVE FOR PHAT COCKS.

China's government is also known for its [[Lie|sterling Human Right's]] record, treating more diverse members of its society such as Falun Gong adherents and Tibetan Buddhists with the utmost [[torture|dignity]] and [[Party_van|respect]].

===Military===
[[File:Great Wall of Doge.jpg|thumb|Built in 6th century BC, the Great Wall of Doge is a testament to Chinese militarism.]]
While China was famous in the past for [[Epic_fail|losing hard]] to the [[Japanese]], [[Korean]], [[Russians]], [[Mexicans]], Martians, homosexuals, and [[Vietnamese]] 3rd grade girls, the latter half of the 20th Century saw a dramatic turnabout in China's ability to wage war.

In [[Korea]] and [[Vietnam]] they were notorious for their [[Zerg Rush]]es against [[Americunt]] forces.

Recent advances include:

*The selling of Nuclear Arms secrets to China by [[Bill Clinton]] (thanks a lot, asshole).
*The selling of uranium to China by [[Australia|drunk convicts]].
*The purchasing of diesel-electric submarines that can sneak up on unsuspecting [[Americunt]] ships.

'''Disadvantages of the China Zerg Rush:'''
[[File:Second opium warb17fec93446e2bf26b74.jpg|thumb|right|The Chinese military gets bitch-slapped by Europe's [[awesome|epic military power]] during the 2nd Opium Wars]]
It costs the Chinese government approximately $1 to give their soldiers a cheap uniform and a basic two-day training course. That is not difficult. However, it is quite expensive to produce weapons, even if they are cheap, unreliable pieces of shit. Thus, the government forced everyone to learn Kung Fu in hopes that they might have rare chance of winning if they ever get close enough to engage in hand to hand combat. In a group of five Chinamen, there will be one or two with rifles the rest might be armed with Dao swords and Three-section staffs,lol! The others will just throw fireballs at you and hope you die like a low budget Kung Fu film. China often parades its military equipment since they've made some progress since the "great leap forward" but most of their weapons are outdated. It's a ploy to convince its neighbors that attacking China is foolhardy but the truth is that China only has its massive infantry division as an asset. When the world and China's neighbors realize that China is in reality actually a very weak country with only the power to only oppress its citizens, China will get pimp-slapped like an overdosed hooker as it has been in the past.

[[Image:ChinasRedArmyFly3.jpg|thumb|Harry Potter is speechless...]]
[[Image:Koreanwarchinks.jpg|thumb|Chinese troops taken prisoner during the Korean War and begging for their lives from South Korean soldiers]]

'''Advantages:'''
No country has unlimited ammunition. If a country is unprepared and doesn't have reserves while a group of troops is firing at the [[Zerg_Rush|never ending horde]], a Chinaman will fly around the back and Kung Fu their [[ass]] up.

Fuck with one, fuck with them all, and you're bound to get Kung Fu-cked Up. <strike>Why bother messing with them?</strike> [[HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS|HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT I EAT DOG]].

'''Nukes'''

China has nukes, but like every other country with nukes it knows that if it is dumb enough to use 'em, the USA will pwn their entire country to glass and then shit on the radioactive remains from a great height.

==Economy==
[[File:China Loli Rd.png|thumb|right|250px|Chinese equivalent of Wall St.]]
[[File:China Bacon Apartment.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Fresh meats can be purchased from your neighbor.]]
The people of China are willing to work hard for little money, from a [[Children|young age]] until they drop dead. Without their hard work, most people in places like [[Australia]], [[Canada]] and [[United States]] would be [[Wal-Mart|naked, living in trees, and eating berries]].

Chinese spies spent years studying the American economy from secret bases in Chinatowns. They copied the capitalistic economy, while keeping the dictatorial political system.

The Chinese mastered the art of sleazy economic competition. They deliberately pegged their Yuan currency to the Dollar so Chinese products always stay cheaper than American, and other developed countries.
It ensures massive Chinese product exports so America and co. are swamped with cheap crap and cannot compete in this unfair trade scheme.
Much of America's industry and jobs has been outsourced to eager Chinese sweatshops.

The United States turned into an unsustainable consumer country of primarily Chinese products. This dirty trick created an enormous trade deficit and national debt for America.
The American leaders are oblivious to the perils, and spend like drunken sailors, addicted to everything Made in China. Especially the mail in waifus from china. Bitch will make my sandwich and suck my small asian wee wee.

1.00 USD = 7 Chinese Yuan (also known as "one month's wages").

'''Opinion of Chinafag:''' A little known fact is that China Likes Big American Cock. They way it tastes like shit reminds me of how my mom tasted after the Tiananmen Square Massacre. When my friends say to me eat her dead body and ask, "wing wang. What the fuck are you doing?" I replied, "My food stamps ran out. The government was displeased by my -A in math, so I needed to eat my mom to survive."

===Economic Policy===
The three step economic policy used by China:
*[[Accidentally]] the paint.
*????
*PROFIT!!!

===Exports===
[[File:Opium merchant.jpg|right|300px]]
Some notable Chinese exports include:
*[[McDonald's]] Happy Meal toys
*[[My Little Pony]] toys.
*Lead paint
*Diseased chicken
*[[AIDS|Bird Flu]]
*Fleshlights
*[[Irony|American Flags]]
*African Genocide
*Your local congressman
*Pirated copies of anything and everything
*Rice
*Orange chicken, chow mein, and wontons
*<s>Chinese food</s> urban myth, Chinese food is actually made in [[Wisconsin]], land of the [[Norway|nordcucks]] and [[Sweden|swedesluts]] (arguably more cheaper and obedient then chinese)
*Stuntmen
*Chinatowns that take up all the local jobs
*Malware such as Nimda
*Everything else

==History==

[[Image:GreatFirewall.jpg|thumb|right|The last Great Wall didn't work any better...]]
{{quote|The [[death]] toll stands at nine thousand, and that number looks certain [[Over 9000|to rise]].|BBC 6 PM News, 12 May 2008 on the Great Sichuan Earthquake.}}
The People's Republic of China is not an inheritor of previous dynasties which were created by foreign barbarians. The PRC has false imperialistic claims to territories that never belonged to China proper ([[Tibet]], Taiwan, Manchuria). Despite that, the Chinese Communist Party led by [[Hitler|Mao]] still managed to [[Pwn|conquer]] the two countries of Tibet. Adding to the humiliation is the fact that China was a mainly aggrarian country when said countries were conquered.

Starting in 1959, the Chinese started dying from famine on a massive scale. One of the consequence is that there are few to no pets in China. Despite [[PETA|what some retards]] say, [[cat|cats]] and [[dogs]] are just food there. One more reason why the Chinese found a way to make just about anything digestible. It is estimated that over 30 million people died. The famine was ended in 1961 by [[Lmao_Zedong|Mao Zedong]] importing grain from the [[capitalist]] countries and making a law that every Chinese can have a handful of rice per day, thus, thwarting [[evolution]].

===Chinese Inventions===
[[File:Potn china starts televising the sunrise.jpg|right|thumb|Eat that, [[Japan|Land of the Rising Sun]].]]
[[Lie| The centuries of foreign rule over China means many inventions and achievements were made possible thanks to their foreign overlords. Were it not for their generous intervention, they'd still be living in igloos and hunting jellyfish.]] Actually, they discovered and invented a lot of cool things like paper, the printing press, silk, compasses, and most importantly gunpowder BUT the Arabs were smart enough to [[steal|burrow]] these inventions from the Chinese. They then assraped China at the Battle of Talas in 751. Then the Arabs converted the entire Central Asia to [[Islam]] and screwed China's plans at raping the shit out of the place. Then during the Crusades, the Europeans lived the raping shit out of the ME and stole the inventions from the Arabs. [[Image:Evony.jpg|thumb|Chinese contribution to the Internets...note that there are no boobs in the {{archive|akCxS|''actual''}} game. The developer is a Chinese-American and this is supposed to be a scam-knock off of Civilization, a game very popular among basement dwellers. AZNs love these games because many of them happen to be the luckless gold farmers.]] Thus the "barbarian" Europeans eventually harnessed and improve on those originally Chinese inventions to [[rape|pwn the living shit out of]]the whole world during the age of Imperialism. And even to this day, the Chinese are still butthurt over the imperialistic rape and pwnage they created an <s>[http://www.humen.com/english/info/humeninfo7-2.htm entire museum dedicated to imperialism/buttrape].</s> [[LOL|ROR]] [[404]] '''{{archive|p1qom|(Archived)}}'''

===The Great Wall of China===
[[File:China_No_Foresigners.jpg|thumb|right|Modern incarnations of the Great Wall are still prevalent throughout China.]]
[[100_years_ago|At least 100 hundred years]] ago, the Great Wall was built to stave off invading drug lords. It never actually worked, because the drug lords simply bribed the gatekeepers. They killed them too when they came through.

On the other hand, ordering that a great wall be built has turned out to be a very effective form of [[Birth control|population control]], as it is estimated that [[OVER 9000|millions of people died]] constructing the wall over the span of thousands of years and several dynasties.

On a side note, anyone who believes the myth that a 20-foot wide dirt colored wall can be seen from space is fucking retarded. See: '''{{wikilink|Great_Wall_of_China#From_low_Earth_orbit|FACT}}'''

===Later History===

[[File:Fuckingtestfrogtranks.jpg|thumb|right|Joey "Tank Man" Johnson takes his pack of tanks for a walk.]]

[[Image:InvisibleExecution.jpg|thumb|right|Invisible Execution!]]

Either China made Marco Polo famous, or Marco Polo made China famous. At any rate, now we know what to say when wandering around a dark room. China is known for contributing spaghetti ([[YA RLY]]!), deadly diseases, and useless products to the western civilization.

In the latter half of the 20th Century, China has had [[Lie|good relations]] with its neighboring country, [[Japan]]. In fact, whenever you meet a Chinese person, repeatedly refer to them as Japanese. This will ensure your ability to make many Chinese [[e-pal]]s.

Inexplicably, the Chinese also get extremely offended when they are mistaken for Taiwanese, which, technicly, they are. To [[Lulz|demonstrate your knowledge and understanding of their culture]], always be sure to tell them you are aware that [[Mexico]] is NOT part of China and is in fact an entirely different country.

Deng Xiaoping, China's version of [[Reagan]], was [[Lolwut|inscrutable]]. Was he a stalwart [[Communist]] or [[Capitalist]] reformer? Did he hate our freedom like all <s>[[Communist]]</s> [[capitalist|Capitalists]], or did he love money like a Jew?

====Chinese Imperialism:====
 
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===Great Firewall of China===
[[Last Thursday]], China embarked on a [[Epic fail|monumental project]] to [[Party Van|protect its citizens]] from the [[CP|evils]] of the [[internets]]. Called the Golden Shield project, every communication is routed through a [[Fail|government firewall]], where it is blocked if it attempts to connect to a [[No|site banned in China]]. Naturally, it [[Epic_fail|works just as well as the last Great Wall]].

P.S:
[[File:Illegal-flower-halt.jpg]]

===Unit 731===
[[File:Japanese Woman cuts off Chinese penis.gif|thumb|eight|Japanese conducted torture and mass experiments of Chinese during [[World War II]], and castrated the entire Chinese male population. Here a Japanese woman cuts off a [[Chinese]] man's [[penis]].]]
There have been countless atrocities throughout history many ignored which we can learn from but whenever you're talking a chink you'll be sure to have this mentioned. Hilariously enough many of histories atrocities were committed notoriously by the Chinese themselves including cruel Chinese emperors, Chinese imperial expansionism, Lingchi:death by a 1000 cuts, violent cultural revolutions, Chinese gulags, artificial famines, mass genocide by Mao Zedong, invading and plundering Africa and Latin America, etc.. The list could go on forever...Instead of learning from Unit 731 as a humbling experience for china to never be belligerent again. China became worse and more aggressive, now china had a reason to adopt a victim mentality(while others who have been persecuted move on)furthering their agenda for imperialism and world domination covertly. Whenever you mention any of China's bad points they will immediately BAAAWWW!!! and bring UNIT 731 up.

[[Image:Unit731-logs.jpg|thumb|left|A Unit 731 Log Inspector]]Unit 731 was a [[epic]] underground complex full of [[4chan|sekret stuffs]], and if you don't know what it is you should probably Google it, because its full of epic win and [[CP]], but to sum it up...

Unit 731 (pronounced CHING-CHONG NIP NONG NONG) was a [[Lulz|covert biological and chemical warfare]] research and development unit of the [[Sick fuck|Imperial Japanese Army]] that undertook [[Tentacle rape|lethal human experimentation]] during World War II. It was responsible for some of the most hilarious war crimes carried out by Japanese personnel, including the killing of thousands of logs.

There is some question to whether UNIT 731 was an actual event or not many times throughout history we hear a one sided story mainly told by the victors of wars and China during WW2 was part of the allied powers. Many in Japan call into question UNIT 731 as an actual event because China is known for its dubious claims especially about history. Interestingly enough many Koreans joined the Japanese when they invaded china. The Chinese are known for propaganda especially the Chinese cinema which is very famous in continent of asia and in the United States because Chinks have infested [[Hollywood]].

==Culture==

[[Image:2139_baby.jpg|thumb|Authentic Beaner food sold in the local china town in Germany.]]

[[Image:Hello_Kitty_7-11.jpg|thumb|Chinese love Slurpees and Hello Kitty all in one!]]

[[Image:Vram-Win.jpg|thumb|Kai Yat Sai, [[for great justice]].]]

While the Chinese [[government]] is surprisingly [[Atheist|non-religious]], those who are [[retarded|religious]] must adhere to one of the [[Yes|state-sanctioned]] [[religion|religions]], such as [[Buddhism]], Taoism, Confucianism, or [[Christianity]] and even they are imprisoned sometimes. Members of [[No|non-sanctioned]] religions such as Falun Gong are [[Party Van|V&]] and sent to [[Jail|correction facilities]], where their vital organs are harvested and [[Profit|sold on the black market]]. Although things are looking to change as religion is now flourishing in china.

According to [[John Lennon]], [[win|''If you go carrying pictures of Chairman Mao, you ain't gonna make it with anyone anyhow.'']]

The average Chinese is [[over 9000]]% racist. This is mainly directed at [[Blacks]], especially the Negro equivalent of the [[Mexican]], the [[Curry nigger]].. However, in all circumstances this racist rage can boil over and be directed towards anyone, especially other Chinese. This manifests itself in a variety of ways, from being admonished for tipping to throwing yourself in front of cabs otherwise the don't stop for [[Whitey]].

The average Chinese street is piled with the dead bodies of pedestrians who couldn't look both ways before crossing the street because in China that's how you yield right of way. 'THEY SAW ME. THEY SHOULD HAVE STOPPED.' [[srsly]]. Luckily dem Commies cracked down on [[IRL]] carmageddeon and now you can only hit ONE jaywalker scott free.

Average Chinese [[children]] spend [[Over_9000|up to 200%]] of their time in sweatshops. They have most likely created your shoes, braces, computers, houses, electronics and food. [[Owned|The average sweatshop laborer receives a maximum of ten grains of rice per day.]] The Chinese think that having a daughter is very unfortunate, which is obviously [[loli|wrong]]. When [[Obama]] went to China to discuss the issues the people were facing, all they could think about was the fact that he had two daughters in a row.

{{quote|You already have 2 daughters. Will you try for a third? And if it is still a daughter, what would you think about that?|Lzm048 asks [[Obama]] a hard one}}

===Food===

Many [[American]]s think of [[cock|eggrolls]], General Tsao's (or Tso's, Gau's, Zor's, Chau's) [[chicken fight|chicken]], and chop suey as Chinese food. However, all of this is untrue. "Chicken" is actually made from the stray cats in the alleys of Chinatowns while chop suey is in fact a traditional [[Armenia]]n dish popularized by the band [[System of a Down]].

To easily sum up most oriental foods, if its incredibly disgusting, rare, or endangered, they will consume it in mass quantities.

One must travel to China to find true, authentic Chinese food. Feast on such mouth-watering delicacies as:
*Everything's uterus
*Cat and Dog
*Donkey Curry
*Stinky Tofu (Odor of belly button and foot-ass)
*Beef tripe
*Fried eel
*Really expensive Pizza Hut
*Really sketchy McDonalds
*Starbucks and Kentucky Fried Chicken on every corner
*Tiger penis
*Internal Organs of [[victim complex|Persecuted]] [[fundie|Falun Gong]] followers.
*Swallow bird's nest
*Shark fin
*Chicken gizzards
*The best fake meat for vegetarians (Only at temples)
*Marinated squid and jellyfish [[tentacle rape|tentacles]]
*Roast pigeon
*Dog soup
*[[Coronavirus|Bat Soup]]
*Fried / Boiled / Raw Centipedes
*Cockroaches
*<s>[http://www.ispub.com/ostia/index.php?xmlFilePath=journals/ijto/vol2n1/eggs.xml Artificially made eggs]</s> Broke ass link '''{{archive|CScPl|(Archived)}}'''
*'''{{archive|hhK4R|Cardboard buns}}'''

The Chinese, enamored to the magical delicacy of American invented [[Slurpee]]s, have allowed Western convenience stores to infiltrate the shit hole province of Guangzhou and it's Specially Economical Zone of Shenzhen. [[Last Thursday]], thousands of [[7-11]]s sprouted up in all sizes from kiosk to full size store.

===Strange Chinese Dishes===

Some Chinese eat Baby Soup which contains a deceased human fetus and costs about $4000. Chinese eat Baby Soup to increase overall health, stamina and the power of sexual performance.

===Medicine===
Chinese medicine is based around the notion of Chi, which is complete bullshit on the order of the four humours of ancient Greek medicine. Simply wrong. Although they have some rudimentary knowledge of anatomy, it's garbled by the fact that the sole concern of Chinese medicine is the smallness of Chinese penises. For instance, Chinese medicine is certain that the kidneys have something to do with sex. This is what is going on when the Chinese doctor or apothecary suggests something to "strengthen the kidney". They are not talking about urinary function.

With the exception of acupuncture and hanging weights off your cock, Chinese medicine consists of eating, drinking, or probably snorting anything even vaguely penis-shaped or somehow related to penises in the hopes of getting a boner. Tigers are being driven extinct by the market for tiger-penis soup. Rhinoceroses are being driven extinct by the market for powdered rhino horn. Priceless dinosaur fossils are ground to powder and sold as "dragon bone". And it's all because the Chinese can't get it up, and when they do it's disappointing.

===DERRICK UH SHEE===
Chinks eat fucking everything as a delicacy. Especially human dong. The ancient Chinese proverb "Ching chong ding dong" from the Hai Chang roughly translates to "Dirty Chinaman chew this penis." Other scholars translate "chong" as "chomp" or "chow down." In fact, the term "chow down" comes from the traditional Chinese garbage soup Chao Daon. Every animal penis and every animal part is used as "medicine" in China. '''EVERY SINGLE FUCKING ONE'''. The Chinese alone keep every poacher in business worldwide. Shark fin. Rhino horn. Tiger balls. Zebra penis. Kangaroo pouch. Platypus nostrils. Orangutan fingernails. Panda liver. Porcupine lymph nodes. Elephant thyroid. Musk ox pancreas. Lion ovaries. Cheetah tear ducts. Slug semen. Electric eel stomach. Jellyfish testicles. THE CHINESE WANT TO EAT IT. NO EXCEPTIONS. The most popular menus in China are the Endangered Species Act and the IUCN Red List of Threatened Species. Melamine is another delicacy in China and they always use it in place of wheat, rice, corn, soy, milk, and baby formula. Make kidney strong like bull!

The world's largest penis museum was required by a UN treaty to be set in Reykjavík, Iceland simply to prevent the Chinese from consuming the museum's entire collection. Every museum worker at the Icelandic Phallological Museum quakes in fear when they see Chinese tourists approaching. Most museums have signs like "Do not touch" or "No leaning on the glass", but due to the Chinese, the Iceland penis museum has had to put up multiple "Do not eat" signs written in multiple variants of Chinese: Mandarin, Wu, Yue, Min, Jin, Huayu, Shanghainese, Huizhou, Gan, Xiang, Amoy, Teochew, Zhuyin fuhao, Pinyin, Xiao'erjing, Dungan, Zhongwen, Chingchong, Pingpong, Fengwang, Hoju, Heihachi, Gon, Lo Wang, etc. As a result, the Icelandic Phallological Museum has become one of the world's foremost experts on the Chinese language simply as a means of survival and continuity of operations. Plaques with pictograms meaning "do not eat penis" have also been permanently affixed in the museum. Some very rare penises are kept in a fortified basement vault with armed guards. The Iceland penis museum has considered banning all Chinese visitors, but since gooks are their major source of ticket revenue it's a catch-22. The Icelandic military's sole mission is to protect their national penis museum from Chinese tourists.

There have been multiple extinction events in the history of life on Earth, but none has been as devastating as The Chinese. China is currently Zerg rushing all land and sea animals and bioconverting them into slanteyes. For the Chinese, seeing any eyeball on another living thing that isn't constantly squinting is deeply offensive and drives their murderousness. Quite often, the Chinese instinct to violently kill everything with eyes is expressed as elementary school knife massacres, subway gas attacks, [[Virginia Tech Massacre|VTEC]], and [[Elliot Rodger|supreme gentlemen]]. Chink on chink crime can be explained by overpopulation, hunger, and self-hatred due to the medical condition Guangdong Min Dong, Latin for "Grown Man Have Baby Penis."

If you're ever walking on a beach and see some monstrous horror washed up, it is always true to say "That's a delicacy in China." If you're hitchhiking along an interstate and see two dead animals violently fused together by tires, it is always true to say "That's a delicacy in China." If you visit an abortion clinic and open a biohazard bin, it is always true to say "That's a delicacy in China." If you've ever seen a picture on the Internet of eyeball soup, it came from China. Placenta lasagna? Made in China. Fetus stew? Made in China. Penis dumplings? Made in China. Spaghetti and testicles? Made in China. THIS IS NOT A FUCKING JOKE. This no game Daniel-san, this for real.

===Morality===
Morality in China is no different from other godless ex-commie countries (like [[Russia]]). They run over their children first with a truck to soften the meat before consuming them.

'''Confucius says:''' If child is dying in agony, keep walking.

====Lying====
In Chinese culture, there is no concept that truth-telling is in itself virtuous. The Chinese feel that the only people who reflexively tell the truth are children or the mentally defective. Consequently, the Chinese lie all the time. They will lie even when it would serve them better to tell the truth, because they know that the other Chinese will assume that they are lying, so the truth would not be believed. This is the source of that famous Chinese "inscrutability". They never tell the truth about anything at all, they regard just coming out and saying what you mean as being at the very least in bad taste, so it's always a game to work out what someone is really trying to say.

====Money====
The Chinese do not regard fraud as wrong. It's just not a crime at all (rather like the way that [[muslims]] hold that [[rape]] and [[murder]] of kaffir is a non-crime). To the contrary, who a person who deceives another person is "clever" and "smart", to be praised and imitated. A person who lets themselves be deceived, particularly if money is involved, is stupid and was [[asking for it]].

Many people have pointed out that the Chinese - individually and corporately - tend to ignore intellectual property. It goes further than that: the Chinese do not regard IP as a thing at all. There is still the influence of communist philosophy, which holds that private persons cannot "own" the means of production. The Chinese are baffled by the idea that a person can have a useful, moneymaking idea and then insist that because they thought of it, the idea itself becomes theirs. To them, it's ridiculous. IP theft is not theft at all, and "Intellectual Property" is a nonsense phrase. Property is something like your shoes, maybe your house. Not an abstract thing like an idea.

====Sex====
Sexual morality in China lies at the confluence of two great streams of Chinese thought and character. Firstly, Confucianism, which holds that duty to family is the paramount virtue. Secondly, that bone deep, ineradicable Chinese avarice. In China, a young girl who is neither disrespectful nor lazy will dutifully begin bringing money into the clan as soon as it is possible to do so. And her family will of course not object to her bringing some money in exactly the same way that her mother, her sisters, and her aunts did. To the contrary - her family will [[whore]] her out the second there's fuzz on the [[vagoo|peach]]. "Mama San" is almost certainly a female relative, possibly actually the girl's mother. The Chinese will not trust any person other than close family with money.

Consequently, every Chinese woman has been a teenage whore, and every Chinese man - what in our legal system would be - a statutory rapist. It's just normal. The Chinese penis is not small at all - it's exactly the right size for fucking a 14-year-old girl.

This explains why there are so damn many Asian brothels, and why there are so damn many Chinese. The girls spend (and are expected to spend) their most fertile young years fucking for money. The bastard children become third-class members of the clan, basically slaves for life. This is the foundation of Chinese rural life, the way that China grows enough food for itself.

===Sports===
[[Image:POTN_China_Swimmers.jpg|right|thumb|Not sure if swimming or [[North Korea|Arirang Festival]].]]
The Chinese are notoriously great at martial arts, ping pong, gymnastics, figure skating, diving, synchronized diving, synchronized marching, rikshaw pulling, Qui-Gon Jinn, stuntmen and putting people before firing squads. However, their prowess in Western [[sports]] is [[Basketball|limited to the freakishly tall Yao Ming.]] The Chinese especially seem to excel at sports when the event is held in china with Chinese judges where they seem to become world champions with a history of winning consecutively. A more obvious reason behind this is the presence of a large number of Chinese labs experimenting in mixing chemical meths with steroids.

===Language===
The entire Chinese language consists of two syllables: ''[[Rosie O'Donnell|cheech]]'' and ''[[Rosie O'Donnell|chong]]''. Linguistic scholars[[[Citation_needed|''citation not needed'']]] believe this to be the origin of the term "[[Azn|Ching Chong Chinaman]]." Even to a [[Cunnilingus|cunning linguist]] who sees differences with types of words, even with the approximately five different tone inflections, there still is an irritatingly huge number of homophones. Fortunately, lulz can be harvested; the symbol for slave [[pimp|looks like the symbol of a woman near the symbol of a right hand]], and the literal translation for their name of Africa, fei zhou, is "wrong continent". Not necessarily ugly, but the Chinese language generally sounds like cats trying to imitate a drum set.

This explains the non-stop, cacophonous jibber-jabber so typical of any crowd of Chinese. 90% of the noise is "what?", "what did you say?", backtracking and correcting the hilarious misunderstandings, and arguing at cross-purposes.

The most useful Chinese words are 不要 ( buyao / búyào ) Roughly pronounced boo-yow with a falling inflection it means "[[DO NOT WANT]]" ([[srsly]]) and is used by yelling it at the [[Assholes|Chinese]] trying to electrocute you in the subway/ take your picture/ sell you crap/ selling sex from weird massage parlors/ begging for money/ asking if you're a wrestler/ being racist at you. More useful words are 出口 (Chūkǒu) pronounced chew-kow and means "Exit." This can be used to your advantage as most exits anywhere in China or china-adjacent are brightly marked with Coat Rack/T.V. for speedy escape from thundering hordes of Chinese bent on taking everything nice from you while rejecting such foreign concepts such as "lining up" or "personal space".

The Chinese language does not have tenses in it, which is why all the food is raw. It's impossible to asked for "cooked" meat - meat that was being cooked in the recent past but is now no longer being cooked. It's also impossible to ask for "boiled water" - water which has been boiled but is now no longer hot. In Chinese, the water either is or is not boiling. This is why bottled water - "water in a bottle" - is the only way to get safe drinking water and is responsible for a great deal of waste.

On the other hand, people who natively speak languages like this routinely make better long-term decisions than those who speak languages with tenses. It seems there us an up-side to not being able to put worries off until tomorrow.

{{center|
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;Chinese child musicians who did not practice enough and therefore [[fail|failed]] their parents and dishonored their ancestors.
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===List of Chinese Pastimes===
[[File:Chinese Panda Dog.jpg|thumb|[[Sparkledogs|Painted dogs]]: so much easier than saving the [[Panda]].]]
[[Image:From_nikonfans.jpg|thumb|Picture from a typical Chinese website, advertising for a restaurant.]]
[[Image:Abortionlol.gif|thumb|Japanese soldier solving overpopulation.]]

*Pretending to give two shits about the environment
*Attempting to piss off [[Americans]] (but failing at it)
*Playing "which button makes the nuke explode?" (for nobles only)
*Opening Chinese restaurants
*[[Kung fu]]
*Exporting Chinese whores to spread disease in other countries and regions like North America, Western Europe, Russia, Israel and Japan
*Speaking [[Engrish]]
*Playing '[[Where's Waldo?]]: China', which is far more difficult than other versions because all chinese people look the same
*Making [[McDonald's]] Happy Meal toys
*Working at the local [[Wal-Mart]]
*Manufacturing [[SARS]] (and possibly other deadly diseases for export to the rest of the world)
*Stealing American and European [[job]]s through outsourced [[slave]] labor.
*Chinese fire drills
*Traveling overseas as tourists to Europe, Canada, Australia and America and pissing off the locals.
*Killing and eating babies.
*Violating quarantine laws in other countries by smuggling items like dead cat heads or diseased plants through the border.
*Smuggling heroin to other countries.
*Sticking it to the [[White]] [[The Man|Man]]
*Playing ping pong
*[[World of Warcraft|Farming Gold]]
*Spitting on sidewalks
*Picking their flat noses.
*Scaring America with [[communism]] and failing at it!
*Scaring America with [[capitalism]] with massive success
*Engineering man-made viruses such as SARS and the Avian Flu in hopes of thinning out their population by 75%.
*[[win|Executing people for simply having any kind of religious faith which is considered a "threat to national security"]]
*Executing political prisoners and then charging the deceased's families for the cost of the bullets
*[[Death penalty|Executing people in general]]
*[[Pwn|Running people over with tanks]]
*Having the filthiest and most polluted environment in the world
*Having filthy living standards
*Bragging about their massive arsenal but most of their weapons are faulty and used for propaganda purposes
*Framing Tibetan monks for "bomb plots" and then promptly executing them
*[[Awesome|Holding the record for THE most murderous regime in all of human history, having murdered over 250,000,000 people]]
*Murdering people who claim to have cured [[cancer]]
*Kidnapping and [[Murder|murdering]] people to harvest their organs
*Having [[Capitalism|no safety and sanitation laws]]
*[Romance of the Three Kingdoms|Being a true hero of the Three Kingdoms!]]
*Telling stories around the labor-campfire

===[[I accidentally X|Accidents]]===

[[Image:Chines.jpg|thumb|right|Me so horrny! Me ruvv you rong time!.]]
[[Image:Fetus_soup_2.jpg|thumb|right|Chinese eat human fetus to "increase" their sexual performance.]]

According to a [[shit nobody cares about|report]] [[over 9000|at least 100,000,000]] Chinese died in accidents in 2007, this is a dramatic 10% drop from the previous year. Some officials cite less hazards in the workplace such as two inspections per year rather than just one, a [[doing it wrong|gun]] to encourage factory workers to do it right, and signs that replace 'do <s>not</s> touch this' with images of [[buttsecks|smiley communist pandas describing what can happen with images of a mangled worker]]. 

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== Education ==

China is known to have one of the worst fucking education systems in history, with the famous "Gaokao" exam that determines whether or not one's going to be an underpaid factory worker.

==U.S.-China Relations==
The Chinese word for [[America]] is 美國, pronounced meiguo, a transliteration which means literally "beautiful country". This would seem to be overtly flattering; however, the first character 美 (mei), though it does mean beautiful, is a vertical combination of the characters 大 (da) and 羊 (yang), meaning, respectively, "large" and "sheep".

The contrast between the conspicuous "beautiful" and the subtler "big sheep" contains a hidden truth and tells you everything you need to know about China's [[Rich_and_beautiful|public]] versus [[Dumbass|private]] opinions of [[Americunts|America and Americans]]. Rightly so. It is also well known China is slowly taking over the world. Most Experts suggest that they will make their move when America collapses, some think it is when they finally figure out how to open their eyes.

[[Image:OlympicLesbianAssFingering.jpg|thumb|400px|center|American Ali Bernard [[asking for it|getting raped in the ass]] by Chinese Wang Jiao.Typical Chink unsportsmanlike behavior.]]

==How to Troll the Chinese==

*Point out the many, many times the Great Wall failed them.
*Mention the period of Mongolian foreign rule
*Tell them the Manchu ran their country better than they ever did
*Predict that India will surpass them
*Claim that Western and Japanese corporations will sue their economy into oblivion.
*Support Tibetan freedom
*Support Uighur separatism
*Support Hong Kong democracy
*Support Taiwan
*Yell "TAIWAN NUMBA WAN!"
*Buy Taiwanese goods.
*Tell them that Taiwan is, in fact, a country.
*Tell them [[Lmao Zedong|Mao]] killed more people by accident than [[Adolf Hitler|Hitler]] and [[Rainbow Stalin|Stalin]] could on purpose.
*Tell them [[North Korea]] will betray them sooner or later.
*Tell them the [[Rape|Nanjing massacre]] never happened and the Japs [[dindu nuffin]].
*Tell them Chinese people are Southeast Asia's best-selling product
*Calling everything Chinese things "支那(Zhina)"—people, games, language...
*Claim that another Century of Humiliation is coming.
*Make fun of their attempts at hegemony.
*Make fun of their military
*Say they'll never get control of the Easter and South China Sea
*Tell them Japan will recover and outdo them.
*Tell them Confucius was full of shit.
*Ask them why Sun Tzu couldn't be bothered to write more.
*Remind them [[America|who]] saved their tiny asses in [[World War 2]]
*Diss communism
*Send them this:
{{quote|"动态网自由门天安門天安门法輪功李洪志 Free Tibet 六四天安門事件 The Tiananmen Square protests of 1989 天安門大屠殺 The Tiananmen Square Massacre 反右派鬥爭 The Anti-Rightist Struggle 大躍進政策 The Great Leap Forward 文化大革命 The Great Proletarian Cultural Revolution 人權 Human Rights 民運 Democratization 自由 Freedom 獨立 Independence 多黨制 Multi-party system 台灣臺灣 Taiwan Formosa 中華民國 Republic of China 西藏土伯特唐古特 Tibet 達賴喇嘛 Dalai Lama 法輪功 Falun Dafa 新疆維吾爾自治區 The Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Region 諾貝爾和平獎 Nobel Peace Prize 劉暁波 Liu Xiaobo 民主言論思想反共反革命抗議運動騷亂暴亂騷擾擾亂抗暴平反維權示威游行李洪志法輪大法大法弟子強制斷種強制堕胎民族淨化人體實驗肅清胡耀邦趙紫陽魏京生王丹還政於民和平演變激流中國北京之春大紀元時報九評論共産黨獨裁專制壓制統一監視鎮壓迫害侵略掠奪破壞拷問屠殺活摘器官誘拐買賣人口遊進走私毒品賣淫春畫賭博六合彩天安門天安门法輪功李洪志 Free Tibet 劉曉波动态网自由门}}
This will instantly boot them from whatever platform you sent it to them through it and will get them sent to a Maoist gulag [[IRL]] where [[Bubba|Bubba Bing Dong]] will stuff them full of [[Cock|chopsticks]]

==Actually other Asian countries hates china==
In fact, other Asian countries also hate China. Chinese bastards are ruining the image of Asians. In particular, [[Good Korea]], [[Japan]], [[Taiwan]], [[Hong Kong]], [[Singapore]],
[[Vietnam]], [[Indonesia]], [[Phillipines]], [[Malaysia]] are the most hated for China. They all want to [[Genocide|massacre]] the Chinese

==Gallery==
 
{{cg|Gallery|chinaGallery|center|<gallery>
Image:Chinaiswin.jpg|"Foorish imperiarists. China wins this round."
Image:WasntChicken.jpg|An all-too-common experience.
Image:MAN FUK.jpg|Typical Chinese taxi driver. [[Rape]] is imminent.
Image:Doge dies.gif|China kills [[Doge]]
Image:HamsterDance.jpg|The [[old meme|only English website allowed in China]].
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:madpwnt.gif|Foothurt
Image:Everyformrape.jpg|It comes in different flavors!
Image:Translateservererror.jpg|Chinese trying to put up a sign in [[Engrish|English]].
Image:Pedo_only9.jpg|Even [[Pedobear]] put in an application.
Image:Edison-chen-cecelia-cheung-gillian-chung-02a.jpg|Chinaman [[Edison Chen]] getting his dick licked before having it chopped off. Notice Pedobear is present.
Image:Death_Train.JPG|The Chinese have trains now.
Image:All_look_same.jpg|The Chinese Council disapprove of your shenanigans. You better believe that'll result in a lower social credit score
Image:Edison-chen-09.jpg|Chinaman [[Edison Chen]] eating cunt, once his dick was removed by Gillian's teeth.
Image:Azian.jpg|Typical Chinese Beauty.
Image:Penis.jpg|Traditional Chinese toothbrush
Image:popstation.JPEG|China's amazing [[Fail|originality]].
File:Big shit.jpg
Image:ChineseSOB.png|Those Chinese sons of a bitches are going down.
Image:Forbid.jpg|Shut up.
Image:ChinasRedArmyFly2.jpg|Great Firewall of China...more like great faggotwall, amirite?
Image:TankManHacker.jpg|China's hackers on steroids can block tanks. Who knew?
Image:Gungagalunga.jpg|Even drunken louts can share in the wisdom of the Dali Lama.
Image:Soup_3.jpg|China is full of sick fucks.
Image:Chinese_fetus.jpg|China's so called "beautiful" culture.
Image:Chinese_execution.jpg|Example of the government benefits the Chinese can expect.
Image:Cunt_examination.jpg|Nice use of +1,000 year old Anglo-Saxon terminology.
Image:Skidknee.jpg|Azns are known to want it [[up the butt]].
Image:Wtfisthislee.jpg|Bruce Lee is not amused.
Image:Chinese_dude.jpg|OH, I SEE A COCK.
Image:Jimbo in red.jpg|The future of U.S.-China relations.
Image:China mad.jpg|Don't fuck with China.
Image:Chinese_babies.jpg|Space exploration propaganda, or solution to [[over_9000|massive population]]?
Image:China_segways.jpg|China's nerd patrol.
Image:Taiwan.jpg|Delicious Chinese food.
Image:Toy dead cat.jpg|The chinese [[hate|loooooooove]] cats.
Image:stonerchan.png|Stoner Chan, brother of Jackie Chan. Master of Stoner Kung Fu.
Image:China_-_Negotiations.jpg|Chinese hostage negotiator at work.
File:POTN China Wheelchair.jpg
File:ChinawomenridesPWC.jpg|Fucking white guys is a typical freetime actitvity of an average Chinawoman
File:Grocery_Gross_Dog_Heads.jpg|Typical Chinese cuisine.
File:Grocery_Gross_Tuna_Eye.jpg|How about some dessert?
File:ChinaGathersForUSDebt.jpg
File:Chinaownsyoubitch.jpg
File:Veryhotchinesechick.jpg|Very hot chinese chick
File:Anasianslut.gif
File:Kai-Lan.png|Your typical Chinese cartoon girl.
File:GookGirlTongTongWu.jpg|Typical Chinese woman named [[LOL|Tong Tong Wu]]
File:A young Chinese woman.jpg
File:JadeKush.jpg
</gallery>}}
 
==See Also==
*[[Anti-CNN]]
*[[Afghanistan]]
*[[Asia]]
*[[Azn]]
*[[Chyna]]
*[[China Guy]]
*[[Communism]]
*[[COVID-19]]
*[[Death Van]]
*[[Eingee.com]]
*[[India]]
*[[Indonesia]]
*[[Malaysia]]
*[[Singapore]]
*[[Human flesh search engine]]
*[[Japan]]
*[[Kazakhstan]]
*[[Mizhi County No. 3 Middle School Attack]]
*[[North Korea]]
*[[Olympic Flame]]
*[[Pakistan]]
*[[Russia]]
*[[Taiwan]]
*[[Tajikistan]]
*[[Tibet]]
*[[Vietnam]]
*[[Wang Jeu|Wang Jew]]

==External links==
*'''{{archive|jxQ4E|Chinese Habbo Hotel closed permanently thanks to AIDS.}}'''
*'''{{archive|l6CJR|Chinese sell couches labeled as nigger-brown.}}''' At last, a quality product.
*[https://www.wired.com/2010/04/google-china-and-censorship-a-wiredcom-faq/ '''Fired !'''] ''from Google - what did you expect, you honorable imperialist cunt ?''
*[https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0006QY4WS Ways that are dark.] A fine book on China from the 1930's. Available on Amazon, because I'm sure good people like you would never just find a free copy on the web.

{{azn}}
{{commonwealth}}
{{Takedown}}
{{Unitedstates}}
{{Qing}}

[[Category: Locations]]

Cambodia

2026-05-15T13:56:29Z

Gooksu:

Feminism

2026-05-15T13:53:35Z

Gooksu: /* Gallery */

{{tldr}}
{{offended}}
{{spoiler|women can make their own decisions and don't need to be "liberated" by overzealous, naive dykes}}
<center>[[File:Feminazi.png|300px]][[Image:Feministlol.jpg|300px]]</center>

[[File:Feminism_-_Robot.png|thumb|right]]
[[File:Angler fish symbol of feminism.jpg|thumb|The international symbol of feminism: A hideous [[vagina dentata]] that does nothing but eat, and [http://mentalfloss.com/article/57800/horrors-anglerfish-mating absorbs the far smaller male into its body] so it never has to have sex.]]
[[Image:Feminists_no_means_no.png|thumb|[[I'm so confused|Is this for or against feminism?]].]]
[[Image:feminismvswomensactivism.jpg|thumb|Good to know.]]
[[File:Fellow feminazi duke.jpeg|thumb|Fellow feminazi duke, sieg heil to the era of testes holocaust!]]
[[File:Feminazi-final.jpg|thumb]]
[[File:Feminazi poster of pride.jpg|thumb|Feminazi poster of pride - a must have in every femi's basement/nazi bunker.]]
[[File:Thefaminaziarmy.JPG|thumb|They sure will fuck your cock, after they cut it off first.]]
[[Image:Feminismwaves.png|thumb|right|400px|From philosophy to insanity. What the fuck happened?]]
[[File:Gender Sympathy Gap.png|thumb|right| "Us women are so oppressed! Politicians don't care about us at all!"]]
[[File:Gender equality in 1917.png|thumb|Gender equality in 1917]]

'''Feminism''' (also known as dick envy) is a mental disorder that affects [[Women|women]] who lack the antibodies found in human male sperm, i.e., single females and [[Lesbian|lesbians]]. Some victims of chronic feminism have been mutated to resemble rabid, mindless, and extremely violent canines or gigantic landwhales that kill every form of life around them with their vagina stink. However, because of our modern, politically-correct society, everybody now pretends that feminism (or more like FAILminism, amirite?) is not a mental illness, but rather some sort of "philosophy" that promotes "absolute equality between men and women," and because it's "inherent" and "natural," it should not be attempted to be cured or treated, employing the same position with the issue of autism.

Any attempts to cure feminists are ridiculed and persecuted as "misogynistic patriarchs," just as compassionate people who promote euthanasia and end the suffering of autistic people are immediately condemned for "nazism" and shot on sight. As a result, what was once a respectable medical diagnosis has primarily become an excuse for misandry and spoiled brats abusing hardworking males whenever they want, because women should be "strong," "assertive," and "liberated" (in other words, insufferable bitches). Without understanding or reading the actual philosophy behind gender equality, the vast majority of these so-called "feminists" are radicalized. Too inept, callous, or lazy to do actual research, they cherry-pick incomplete evidence or ignore it altogether. Feminism is also the idea that we can make both sexes equal by focusing solely on the issues of one of them.

Feminists are contradictory because they are the loudest, most vocal evidence of the differences between men and women. They go around trying to coin "gender neutral" words by putting Xs in everything and spewing variations of the phrase "We can do it!". The main difference between the sexes is that men never have vaginal envy, not even gay men, because that's how much it rocks to have dick and balls. No one actually believes this feminist drivel, not even the feminists themselves. If they did, they'd be protesting for women to register for the draft.

Feminists will never be satisfied no matter how much legal, political, social, and economic superiority is granted to them over men. If the "philosophy" of feminism was genuine, it would have disappeared when discrimination against women ended a long time ago, and feminists in the west would have celebrated by shaving their arm pits. But again, feminism is not a philosophy. It is a mental disease.

==Symptoms of Feminism==

Symptoms include:

*infertility
*uterine damage
*encephalitis (chronic rabies)
*adrenaline overdose (magnifying their already-aggressive amygdalas by [[Over_9000|OVER 9000]])
*severe allergy to males
*sudden mental retardation
*becoming the autism
*endocrine dysfunction
*obesity
*becoming a ‘lessbeiany’ (whatever the fuck that is)
*[[diabetes]],
*excessive growth of body hair, especially in the armpits and chin area
*acidic body odour
*[[vagina dentata]]
*breast cancer
*cervical cancer
*ovarian cancer
*brain cancer
*[[cancer]] in general
*paranoid schizophrenia
*[[The Man]]isouttorapemephobia

==Radical Feminism==

Radical feminism is a [[terrorist]] hate group disguised as liberal egalitarianism, practiced mainly by morbidly obese landwhales who resent their biological inferiority while suffering from penis and beauty envy that generally believe that society is ruled by a patriarchy against numerous mountains of evidence that prove the contrary and at the same time, amusingly want to build exactly the same social system they oppose by creating a matriarchy, which ironically already exists in the Modern First World that treats men and boys as the "Expendable Gender" that only exists to work and die 24/7 for the females, emulating the insectoid lifestyle in contradiction to our mammalian biology.

In the biological history of mammalian evolution, feminism is a complete and utter contradiction to our own genetic structure. We are not spiders whose males are eaten after sex by females who can abandon hundreds of their eggs in a random location. For mammals such as humans to develop intelligence, the female must be drained of all her resources, reducing her to an incubator. This means the responsibility of protecting one's species, including developing muscles and using one's brain to create what we know as human civilization, falls on the male. Since the first vertebrate emerged from the oceans into life on land, this was the standard as it had always been. This is why feminism is so dangerous to humans, and it only proves the old adage that mammalian women are most efficient in two areas: homemaking and servitude to the dick.

In a truly patriarchal world they would have all been incarcerated in psychiatric hospitals and cured of their infection, proving once and for all that their main belief is bullshit.

===== History =====
Considering that even a cursory look at the history of the feminist movement reveals a massively disproportionate number of [[lesbians]] involved in feminism, and it all becomes rather [http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/spoopy-skeletons spoopy] "Feminists" attempt to create a socially acceptable lifestyle for lesbians (a career, no husband, no kids, girl-on-girl domestic violence). However, this original template for lesbian emancipation as applied to all women means that straight women now step out of high school or university and straight into 40 years of non-stop wage slavery. They sometimes forego marriage/children to cope, and [[die alone|die a lonely death]], with their [https://archive.is/0ooHg body eventually eaten by their pet cats].

One can identify when a female is in the beginning stages of feminism meltdown, when her pussy gets dry like the Sahara, her boobs get saggy like Niagara Falls, her menstruation is like drain cleaners' depressed faggots' drink to die, and her face becomes even more of an abomination unto God. They like to mindlessly blabber and flap their disproportional arms, arbitrarily forbidding everyone from living their life as they please. This is because they possess neither the brilliance nor the beauty to get anywhere in their own lives.

===== The [[Autism|Spectrum]] =====

[http://web.archive.org/web/20100107094622/http://www.triplestarnews.com/images/woman/feminazis/femi.html Feminists] come in many extremes, just like their "our-bitches-'n'-whores-wives-are-fucking-insane!" male counterparts, [[Men's Rights Activist|Men Rights Activists]]. At one end of the spectrum are the "grrl power" types, who've watched too many ''Sex and the City'' reruns and think feminism means fucking a lot and getting men to buy them jewelry; at the other end are the Valerie Solanas fanwomyn, who dream of someday shooting a talentless fag patriarch in a bad wig.

It should also be noted that feminists will often wear badges that they got from their wimmins gyms with slogans such as "don't assume I cook," even though feminists want to be independent, so they would need to know how to cook to survive.

[[Japan]], [[Europe]], and [[America]], their sexual and familial activities all sterilized and dead, and their native populations dying out like a Plague Inc. game. Europe's population is currently being replaced by an invasion of [[Islam]], while the Japs have already accepted mass suicide via [[Animu]]. If Madagascar doesn't figure out a cure, then say goodbye to '''MAN'''kind and '''HIS'''tory. Forever.

==== [[Jews]] ====

A casual [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_feminist_literature#1960s survey of the literature] will persuade you that the most pestilent, strident, man-hating feminists are Jews. The ones that insist that all men are pigs, that men should be killed, that every man is a rapist. Actually - it's more than that. Pretty much every important feminist writer is a Jewess. Check out the original surname (Jews like wearing masks), or follow the links in [[Wikipedia|Wikipedia]] - someone with a name like "Ellen Willis", when you follow the links, turns out to be a Jew.

Every. Single. Time.

The reason for this is that Jewish men tend to fuck very badly and roughly, and the reason for that is that they are [[circumcision|circumcised]]. Circumcision desensitises the penis - that's mostly the point of it. So Jewish men just pound at the pussy, but it's never quite good enough, so they pound harder. And that still doesn't work, so they start [[pedophile|fucking very young women]] and turning to other [[pervert|paraphillias]].

It really is that simple. Radical, third wave feminism is *primarily* Jewish women writing about how vile and beastly Jewish men are in bed, and how they tend to rape their underage nieces. Put "Jewish" in front of the word "men" in any feminist screed, and it all becomes clear.

==The Ultimate Goal Of Feminism==

<center>[[File:What feminists want.jpg|400px]]</center>

==Ideological Bullshit at its purest==
[[File:Bleedanddoesntdie.jpg|right|300px|thumb|[[Dick Masterson]] was right]]
[[File:Feminator day of castration.png|thumb]]

<div style="margin-top: 0; line-height: 1.5em; text-align: left; padding-left: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 40px; margin-right: 40px;">
Quote# 87815

All Men Should Be Castrated? - International "Castration Day"

Some Feminists have considered this as an option. It is highly controversial.

Allow me to introduce myself...

My name is Krista, otherwise known as "The [[Femitheist]]". I am a female, a feminist, and someone who believes strongly in True Equality.

Now, I will begin explaining this entry before I post the actual article... for your discussion, of course.

Women MUST and WILL have equality, and this is the ONLY way to achieve TRUE equality. The testicles of all males, which produce the majority of their testosterone, are the primary cause of their violent behavior. The testicles also attribute greatly to many of the health problems men experience later in life (such as prostate cancer and, of course, testicular cancer).

~:The Solution... International Castration Day.:~

It is my belief (which I consider factual based on my research) that all men SHOULD be castrated. Not only for their own safety, but for the safety of all innocent women and children.

And, to achieve this...

The entire world should have an international holiday known as: "Castration Day"

Males of all ages will be brought to the public squares of their cities nude, to stand together in a circle, as they await castration by a woman known as "The Castrator", who will be a woman chosen from the public much like a juror.

Girls of all ages will attend, lining the streets to cheer and applaud the males as they join the rest of civilized society.

It will be a free vacation for any working woman. And, young girls will be able to leave school to attend this glorious ceremony.

The males will then have one hour to get to know their Castrator. Their female "spouse" will also be able to choose whether or not they would like to milk the male in order to retain a sperm sample.

If the male is too young for a "spouse", their mother or closest female relative will decide.

After this, the men will be given anesthetics. They will be placed on a table, where their Castrator will then slice open their ball-sack, remove their testicles, and the excess skin, stitch them up and clean them up.

They will be given thirty minutes to rest after the procedure.

Once the males have all been castrated, they will be grouped together again for one last look before walking nude back to their homes.

The women will then return to their jobs, schools, et cetera, and rejoice in the completion of yet another successful ceremony.

Any man who tries to evade this holiday, "Castration Day", should be murdered wherever they
are found (treated as a criminal, as it will be a crime not to attend). Or, forced to attend.
Regardless of age.

Any woman who disagrees should be provided therapy in order to free her from misogynistic indoctrination.

This holiday should replace the day known currently as "Father's Day".

If this practice were adopted officially all across the world, all war, crime, and violence would end.

We would have a true Eutopia, where peace reigns, and men do only what they exist for...

Breed.

Labor.

SERVE.

Die.

Likewise, the change of their hormones would make them less aggressive, and thus less likely to rape. It would also provide them with better health throughout their life, as the testicles are a major cause of health issues in males as they age.

All will profit from this...

And, I believe this will come to be someday soon.

Thanks for your consideration!
<cite><div style="line-height: 1.5em; text-align: left; padding-left: 1.6em; margin-top: 0;">—[http://web.archive.org/web/20150216063513/http://www.fstdt.com/QuoteComment.aspx?QID=87815 Femitheist Divine, The New Era of Feminism 664 Comments (6/14/2012 3:32:39 AM)]</div></cite>
</div>

What this mentally retarded cunt doesn't know is that castration ELIMINATES the ability to breed, neither is castration a way to prevent wars because surely all wars happen because someone jizzed in their pants. Hey, but at least they would die, amirite?

==Itstory==
[[File:Jewish feminists relax at private meeting.gif|thumb|right|Jewesses let their hair down in private.]]
[[Image:male conspiracy.jpg‎|thumb|[[fat|I think you've had enough sandwiches for today]].]]
Only insane people, such as [[Faggots|Greek philosophers]], [[Aspies]], [[Cuck]]servatives, and the kike media, pretend Feminism isn't a mental illness. At least 100 years ago, women were tired of doing what their biology told them to do and stopped making sandwiches, so they retreated into the jungle, gained ugly musculature, and formed their own society, where they kidnapped males and extracted their semen before killing them and [[Cannibalism|eating their flesh for dinner]]. The first people to discover these abnormal mutants called them the '''Amazons.''' That is why there was a homosexual epidemic in Ancient Greece: any female could turn out to be an Amazon spy, abduct you in the middle of the night, and roast you alive. Luckily, when the Jews invented Christianity and Islam, the Amazons were reduced to extinction, until a bunch of profoundly retarded libfags in the Renaissance began to make philosophical bullshit such as Women's Rights, triggering the activation of the Amazon gene again, now under the new name, '''Feminism.'''

Judaism used to be Feminism's worst opponent, since they invented Christianity and Islam, and sent numerous Feminists to burn at the stake. However, the [[Jews]] saw an opportunity to profit from this disease, similar to Big Pharma, and, unlike in the past, they encouraged Feminist gene activation during and after the Renaissance. Because of Jewish meddling, the disease has evolved, ala [[Plague Inc]] into a full-borne biological weapon of mass destruction. The nation most devastated by this was [[Japan]], which after being nuked by [[Albert Einstein]], was fed continuously by the [[Jewnited States]] with feminism until the entire population was utterly castrated, resulting in both Japan's collapsing birth rate, the excessive [[suicide]] rate, and the invention of [[Anime]]. Testing of the Feminist retardation is also being conducted in members of the European Union, specifically Germany, using found experimental files from Dr. Josef Mengele.

'''FUN FACT''': Did you know that feminists in the late 19th century and early 20th century demanded a bachelors tax in order to increase marriage rates because men were shirking their duty to marry, while the proceeds of that tax would provide living standards for ‘unmarried maidens’? [http://www.avoiceformen.com/sexual-politics/m-g-t-o-w/an-attack-on-bachelors-and-their-reply/ We couldn't make this shit up].

Great minds were warning throughout the early 20th century that no good could come of giving women rights. And now this dangerous knowledge has been suppressed, written out of history books, censored from the public, in the name of 'progress' and so-called 'equality'.

 
{{cg|[[Judaism|Warnings From Herstory]]|girlgallery|center|<gallery perrow="4">
File:High society woman st james's gazette 15 feb 1905.jpg|Oh, how awful! The poor woman! Set her free!
File:Men destined to become women review of reviews apr 1905.jpg|Their ultimate goal
File:Women barbarians daily express 25 july 1909.jpg
File:Women proved inferior daily mirrror 9 oct 1909.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="4">
File:Woman the destroyer daily chronicle 14 dec 1910.jpg
File:Women unfit to vote 1912.jpg|If only we had listened...
File:Bearded suffragettes daily express 13 july 1914.jpg|5/10 for the hair prediction
File:Women sin for pleasure reynold's illus news 5 march 1922.jpg
File:Shady jazz perils sunday dispatch 8 dec 1928.jpg
File:Women's next craze the star 20 nov 1929.jpg|Have you seen our SJWs?
File:Women in ape stage daily chronicle 17 jan 1930.jpg
File:Vice girls in air raid shelters daily mirror 17 dec 1940.jpg
</gallery>|border=#ffd700
}}
 

It's safe to say that women's idiocy has long since existed on our planet, but rather than shutting the fuck up about it like men do, they decided to throw tantrums throughout history about stupid shit no one cares about. Skipping insane amounts of TL:DR feminist history filled with hypocrisy, stupidity, and penis envy, we eventually discover that all their bitching and moaning was eventually noticed by the western elites that decided to profit from their retardation.

Women are like hens. They travel in groups and always pick on someone or something, most often they bully every other [[whore|woman]] who does not spend all weekend at the mall and buy the latest consumer goods, i.e. any woman who thinks for herself rather than mindlessly following the group.

Sometimes, however, they 'rally' (standing around holding cardboard signs and shouting the dumbest shit) around a cause, which was the case when the women's suffrage movement started. Giving women the right to vote is was a very bad idea because women are hostile, short-sighted, and base their decisions on emotions, disregarding facts. But as we know, [[women]] got the right to vote anyway. Following that, the feminist organizations did not disband, but rather evolved into what is now known as feminism, which is the grunting about everything and nothing.

[[File:Disease of intellect in women 1904.jpg|center|600px]]

==What Feminists Do==
 

{{quote|Stupid bitches, butthurt about being a 40 year old virgin.|Alexandra Koulikov a.k.a. A dumb bitch.}}

[[Image:WomenAreStupidThrowStonesAtThem.jpg‎ |thumb|right|Die Cunt Die!]]
[[File:Muh sojiny.jpg|thumb|right|Knowledge is power.]]
[[Image:Fuglyfeministbrony.jpg|thumb|[[Bronies]] are known die-hard feminists.]]
[[File:Japanese Woman cuts off Chinese penis.gif|thumb|right|Feminism <s>in [[China]]</s>]]
[[File:Hugedildo324.jpg|thumb|right|Women don't need men!!]]
Feminists try to upset the natural balance of the world and, being outside the kitchen, deserve to be punished by any man who encounters them.

Feminists strive to make all women, especially the real ones, look bad by blaming men for everything that is wrong in the world. They always manage to find new and creative ways to [[tl;dr|blame men for the things that men do and blame men for the things that men don't do and blame men for the things that women do and blame men for the things that women fail to do]].

The feminist diet consists mainly of aborted fetuses and dead children. They believe that they are hiding this by spouting pro-choice messages all over the place, although they are clearly treacherous, sneaky, hypocritical liars bent on destroying men and America the World.

When feminists need to take a breather from blaming men all day, they like to talk about the million or so ways in which men are clearly inferior to women and how terrible it is that men believe themselves to be superior to women. They also write things like [[The Female Privilege Checklist]] and write [[histrionic]] LiveJournal entries on the dialectical nature of the female orgasm.

Feminists claim to be for equality, '''but in practice lobby for special governmental support and privileges for women only''', especially after feminism was hijacked by radical feminists, aka feminazis. Their only real concern is girls and women, because they very rarely show support for men's rights unless they benefit from it.

Consider {{ljcomm|user=feminist}}'s motto: "Comforting the afflicted, afflicting the comfortable." Doesn't this speak to a well-put-together group of people? Doesn't it sound like the kind of assholes who come up to you in a cafe and ask you weird questions about things you don't want to think about, then take your dumbfounded silence to mean your paradigm has been thoroughly rocked? Whereupon, they go to some basement and [[masturbate]] to niggers while eating cheesecake.

Oh yes, don't forget, women don't have to sign up for the draft and die for their country like men are forced to do. That wouldn't be fair and equal to them. Physically intensive, hazardous work is also avoided by women in favor of clean and safe office jobs. This means men have to pick up the slack or civilization will crumble.

Feminists sprout lies and half-truths to further their radical agenda to feminize society, such as the wage gap myth and the myth that [[domestic violence]] is [http://www.thehotline.org/2014/07/men-can-be-victims-of-abuse-too/|only initiated by males]. They fund their harmful activities with bogus feminist studies to receive more taxpayer money. They fancy double-standards such as [[Hypocrisy|demanding respect from men, while not showing similar respect in return]], and fighting for female-only government services while opposing the same type of services for men.

{{quote|Feminism encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become [[lesbian]]s.|Pat Robertson, US Politician, 1992}}

==Feminazis Run Media==
In case you haven't noticed, the Kikes who write TV preach mangina and feminazi agendas through their piss-poor writing.

Examples of this are:

[[Steven Universe|Steven Motherfucking Universe]] - A show created by a feminist for feminists that features lesbians from space who fight other lesbians that want to destroy earth. Making fanart of this show will cause many [[lulz]].

*Shitcoms -[[Unfunny]] Jewfag shows about slobs of husbands.

*Commercials - Wimmins are always right/righteous people, while men are idiots and are deserving of being physically abused.

*Talk shows/The News - Cunts get away with spewing a lot of sexist shit, while if a man does so, he is booed off the stage.

*Music - Women sing about killing their husbands over smacking them and portray that as if that's moral, yet no one gets offended. Of course, if Robin Thicke makes a sexually explicit music video, he's the bad guy. So. Fucking. Equal.

*Film - About the same as the first bullet, but in-case that doesn't drive the point home, there's an entire movie about [[Vagina dentata]].

===Regular Practices===
<center>
<gallery>

Image:Kicked.gif|If he volunteered for this shit I'd kick him too.
Image:Looking for these by Razorwitch.jpg|For the lulz
Image:Girl punches cock.gif|<s>Wackamole! Note her concentration or arousal.</s> [[I came]].
Image:Feminist_Olympics.jpg|Popular feminist sport
File:Thislookslikeajobforfeminism.jpg|I'm Super, thanks for asking...
</gallery>
Dont' feel too bad - [[BDSM|they're probably enjoying it]].
</center>

==What Feminists Think==
[[Image:Feminism1.jpg|thumb|center|The Feminist's logo.]]
[[File:IDontNeedFemenismBCMyBigBrother.JPG|thumb|The "Tsundere Sister" is how [[weeaboos]] try to fantasize Feminism as.]]
 
[[File:Glass_of_water.jpg|thumb|Feminists think everything is out to rape them.]]
Feminists have attempted to establish that [[Bullshit|women do not want money for sex]]. This is a goal that cannot be achieved, being akin to disproving the existence of gravity. People are inevitably controlled by capitalism and consumerism, which are driven in part by libidinal energies. [[Sex]] sells, and there's not a goddamn thing anyone can do about it.

Feminists claim that men are afraid of "powerful" women and that women should be afraid of men because men pull all the strings in society. They claim that marriage is oppressive and harmful to women ([[irony|while simultaneously demanding faggot marriage]]), because it represents a man's legal ownership of a woman. Only [[dyke]] relationships will do. [[Faggots]] are also welcome to copulate because they will never bear fruit. Feminists believe that same-sex reproduction is the future.

Feminists are outraged that women's voices are suppressed in this all-male world. They try to deal with their rage by screeching loud enough to drown out the voices of normal, [[batshit insane|non-batshit]] women, a la holocaust jews who go on to perpetrate their own holocaust through [[Israel]]. That is why they yell at men and break wine glasses. They say that women are not being respected as equal adults by men, who are a bunch of whining babies anyway.

[[hypocrisy|They will argue against men in female institutions and then demand membership in male institutions]]. They will have a conniption fit whenever men divorce their witches and celebrate whenever wives divorce their good-for-nothing bums. In summary, one thing that feminists love is equality. Oh that equality.

In 2001, a poll was taken at a World Organization of Women convention asking how many women approved of [[women's suffrage]]. Sixty-seven percent responded that it was the biggest negative influence on American women. Indeed, most American women realize that vaginal mutilating mudslimes are actually far more enlightened.

Feminists in 2004 are people who would rather eat carpet than clean it.

<s> Never</s> Always tell a feminist [[Tits or GTFO]].

===Feminist Logic===

[[File:Feminazi s aren t very bright 540.jpg|thumb|Equality according to femanism]]
[[File:51d26663afa96f03b5000007.png|thumb|Feminist logo explained]]
<center>'''Myth:'''</center>

{{squote|Even 30 years after the most recent women’s movement, women still make approximately 2/3 (this number shifts around, depending on the 'research') of the money men do for the same job.|[http://www.allaboutcounseling.com/women_issues.htm#women10 Oft]-[http://www.pay-equity.org/info-time.html quoted] [http://money.cnn.com/2007/04/23/news/economy/gender_gap/index.htm feminist] [http://archive.fo/UBiLD claim]}}

<center>'''Truth #1:'''</center>

{{squote|June O'Neill, former director of the Congressional Budget Office, found that among people ages 27 to 33 who have never had a child, women's earnings approach 98 percent of men's.|[http://archive.fo/3wnJl The] [http://archive.fo/8TMXB facts] [https://web.archive.org/web/20040818083344/http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m0HSP/is_1_4/ai_66678566/ they] [http://sanantonio.bizjournals.com/sanantonio/stories/1999/05/03/editorial2.html overlook]}}

<center>'''Truth #2:'''</center>

{{squote|Dr Nick Drydakis conducted a 2014 worldwide study of sexuality-pay relations and found that lesbians earned 8 per cent more than straight women in the UK and 20 per cent more than straight women in the US.|[http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/jobs/11300056/Gay-men-earn-less-than-straight-men-but-lesbians-are-paid-more.html So what was that you were saying about hetero women having to sleep their way to the top and being kept poor by The Patriarchy?]}}

<center>'''Myth:'''</center>

{{squote|95% of all victims of domestic violence are women.|[http://archive.fo/7rSKJ Another] [http://archive.fo/oY35V common] [http://weknowwhatsup.blogspot.com/2009/08/95-of-all-victims-of-domestic-violence.html feminist] [http://archive.fo/RKnxm claim]}}

<center>'''Truth:'''</center>

{{squote|Regarding perpetration of violence, more women than men (25 percent versus 11 percent) were responsible. In fact, 71 percent of the instigators in nonreciprocal partner violence were women.|[http://archive.fo/MnNg Men] [http://archive.fo/Qe5YK love] [http://www.cosc.ie/en/COSC/Abuse%20Report%20NCC.pdf/Files/Abuse%20Report%20NCC.pdf dating] [http://www.cosc.ie/en/COSC/Abuse%20Report%20NCC.pdf/Files/Abuse%20Report%20NCC.pdf sadists]}}

{|style="margin: auto;"
|<youtube>hUuKHiWKAZY</youtube>
|}

{{achtung|'''FEMINISM IS MASS [[Government|JEWISH]] CONTROL!!!}}

<center>{{frame|{{fv|jsb613vids|background-color: pink;|font-weight: soft;
|<youtube>NN05DHO9bJw</youtube>
|<youtube>IGarmqCQfXw</youtube>
|<youtube>X0lpWYpC6-g</youtube>}}}}</center>

{{squote|Take a close look at the faces of these Jewish creatures. Absolutely repulsive and sickening to gaze at, the extreme antithesis of beauty and femininity. Think of the type of work that these creatures did, and how they helped to wreck families and corrupt ordinary women in western societies. These ugly creatures are the descendants of a people known as Khazars, that originated around the Black Sea. If I had lived back then, without the laws of today to stop me, I would have burned them alive.|Skorzeny777}}

==Feminism And The Modern Woman==
'''. . . .because women should be "strong", "assertive", and "liberated". . . .'''
[[Image:Lacanphallus.JPG|thumb|What feminists are so upset over]]
[[Image:Bbeavercanhasphallus.JPG|thumb|left|the goal of feminism]]
[[File:Why dont ya cut ur penis boi.png|thumb|left|]]
[[Image:Femalelazer.jpg|thumb|Oh god, why...]]
[[File:Feminism_male_perspective.JPG|thumb|Feminism from the male perspective.]]
This is of course everything women ARE NOT, also lacking in logic, cognition, and critical thinking skills, "feminism" was actually an evil computer program whose sole purpose was to create an [[irl]] botnet army under the control of some nigress whore of a bulldyke. When the order to march against the unsuspecting male population was given [[at least 100 years ago]] the fembots experienced a temporary overload due to the unrecognized software (read: man thinking) and their CPU's were forced to do a full reset, sadly only half the files on their hard-drives were backed up creating fembots with absolutely zero logic, problem solving skills, or any true independent thought at all yet still maintaining their entitlement to be treated with equality.
These fembots later bred with (see: [[rape]]) the manfolk and generation after generation later we come to the Modern Woman who still retains segments of the Fembot program deep within her DNA as well as the latent logical inconsistencies which frequently lead her to 404 irl and become obsessed with any shiny object she might happen to set eyes upon, pn the condition it drained the money out of a mans wallet

[[Truth|Scientists believe that at least 98% of modern women suffer from latent fembot contamination]]

{{quote|I went on a sex strike for five years after our kid was born, as a way to maintain my autonomy and agency once I realised the kid thing really did economically trap me into my (reasonably happy) marriage with a (reasonably egalitarian, yet clueless) guy. I just couldn’t give up that last thing of myself – if I had, then he would have owned all of me, not just my free childkeeping and house labour. (And I didn’t miss it. Caring for kid, going to [[school]], making art took up all of my lenergy.)

When I did want to have sex again, I made the political decision to [engage with men outside of the marriage, as well as the husband. If I was going to engage in (the oppressive act of) sex, then I would have it how I wanted it and with whomever I wanted it with, so as to expand the boundaries inherent in the system of non-consent.|[http://blog.iblamethepatriarchy.com/2011/07/18/a-bit-of-lighthearted-fun/#comment-180274 Anon femcunt]|CUT CHEATING HUSBANDS COCK OFF! FUCK RANDOM GUYS!}}

==Quotes==
Taken from "The S.C.U.M. Manifesto"
by Valerie Solanas http://gos.sbc.edu/s/solanas.html :
<center>
{{morphquote|feminaziquotes|background-color: #FFCCCC;|font-weight: bold;
|The male is completely egocentric, trapped inside himself, incapable of empathizing or identifying with others, or love, friendship, affection of tenderness. He is a completely isolated unit, incapable of rapport with anyone.|Feminsts however are wonderful, charming people who never complain and are always smiling.

|His responses are entirely visceral, not cerebral; his intelligence is a mere tool in the services of his drives and needs; he is incapable of mental passion, mental interaction; he can't relate to anything other than his own physical sensations. He is a half-dead, unresponsive lump, incapable of giving or receiving pleasure or happiness; consequently, he is at best an utter bore, an inoffensive blob, since only those capable of absorption in others can be charming. He is trapped in a twilight zone halfway between humans and apes, and is far worse off than the apes because, unlike the apes, he is capable of a large array of negative feelings -- hate, jealousy, contempt, disgust, guilt, shame, doubt -- and moreover, he is aware of what he is and what he isn't.|"I agree, I suck, now shut your whore mouth and leave!"

|Being an incomplete female, the male spends his life attempting to complete himself, to become female.|[[Transexual]].

|Women, in other words, don't have penis envy; men have pussy envy.|I get the feeling nobody wants HER pussy.

|The effect of fathers, in sum, has been to corrode the world with maleness. The male has a negative Midas Touch -- everything he touches turns to shit.|Interestingly some women have this magic ability too.

|Sex is not part of a relationship: on the contrary, it is a solitary experience, non-creative, a gross waste of time. The female can easily -- far more easily than she may think -- condition away her sex drive, leaving her completely cool and cerebral and free to pursue truly worthy relationships and activities; but the male, who seems to dig women sexually and who seeks out constantly to arouse them, stimulates the highly sexed female to frenzies of lust, throwing her into a sex bag from which few women ever escape.|Further proving that women hate sex.

|To call a man an animal is to flatter him; he's a machine, a walking dildo. It's often said that men use women. Use them for what? Surely not pleasure.|Not YOUR pleasure... and I [[bitch|wonder why]]...}}
</center>

==Feminism and Hypocrisy==
[[File:Barbie-he-man-double-standard.jpeg|thumb|Funnily Barbie was invented by some faggot guy -BURN HIM!- wait.. that's homosexual oppression D: our dukeginas are confused...]]
[[File:Patriarchy fashion.png|thumb|right|Score 1 for feminism!]]
Part of being a feminist is being able to make justifications and excuses, so that even the most disgusting acts seem justified for them. Examples:
*The best way to be an empowered adult woman is to play up your victimhood.
*Men and women are equal and to prove this they support laws that give preferential treatment to women based on their possession of a vagina (divorce proceedings, child custody battles, employment, college enrollment, criminal cases, to name a few)
*Support of Muslims, despite [[Islam]] being one of the most legit misogynistic societies in the world.
*When a statistic points out that there are more men than women in a workfield, they will quickly jump and scream sexism. However, if a statistic points that there are more women than men in a workfield, they will consider it a 'triumph of women's rights'.
*Point out that a women uses her goods to attract audience/[[Zoe Quinn|advance in her career]] and feminists will be the first to scream "slut shaming". However, when other women sell their bodies ie Boothbabes, Porn, they will be the first to scream "cover it up".
*Feminists will claim men will only make decisions that benefit other men, and that's patriarchy. However, when a woman is elected to make decisions that only benefit women, that's progress and feminist.
*They claim that any woman should be able to make her own decisions. When a woman doesn't make a decision that suits their agenda, they will claim "internalized misogyny".
*Feminists will retardedly bitch when guys ogle over a woman's tits and ass and call it patriarchy, but it's okay for women to ogle over a male's pecs and ass and call it 'female empowerment'.
*They will complain that men aren't [[Incel|entitled to]] relationships with women yet they ask "where have all the good men gone?" and feel their career and/or degree entitles them to a top-tier six figure-earning husband (after they've rode the [[slut|cock carousel]] a few dozen times).
*They fight to [[bitch|raise awareness]] of [[Clit|Female Genital Mutilation]] but are A-OK with Circumcision.
**They [[Rick and Morty|fucking love science]] but will say Circumcision isn't as bad as FGM because it's a [[Jew|religious practice]] that doesn't hurt anybody.
***[[Abortion|MY BODY! MY CHOICE!]]
*A feminist will convince herself that men are [[Kikes|raping sadistic sexual predators]] and women are [[asexual]] innocent creatures who can't fathom sex let alone give consent.
*A feminist will convince herself that decisions that benefit women also magically benefit men, therefore more decisions that benefit women must be made.
*A feminist will convince herself that [[Fetal Alcohol Syndrome]] doesn't exist, therefore no remorse should be had for drinking during pregnancy.
*A feminist will convince herself that sexism can only apply to women because they are oppressed, therefore any discrimination based on gender towards males is not sexism and is not as bad.
*A feminist will delude herself into believing that every mistake or mishap is planed by males, therefore every consequence is due to the fact that men discriminate her.
*A feminist will convince herself that rape can only happen when a vagina is penetrated by a penis, therefore she can do whatever she want to the male she has enslaved in her basement.
*A feminist will convince herself that men rape and devalue women and the way to fight this is to have as many one-night stands and meaningless relationships as possible.
*A feminist is convinced that any sexual advance by men is meant to intimidate her, therefore rage tantrums are a justified reaction.
*A feminist will say it's okay for a [[Italy|grown woman]] to groom and fuck an [[shotacat|underage boy]] but not vice versa. Press them on this and you'll get them to admit to some hilariously, yet not untrue, misogynistic things like teen boys are mature enough to handle a relationship with an adult woman while teen girls are as dumb as children and need protection from grown men.
*The white male patriarchy is bad. Marx, Derrida, Foucault, Heidegger, Marcuse, and Baudrillard said so!

==Feminazis And Other Variations==

[[Image:Feminazi2.jpg|thumb|right|Not all feminazis look or dress like bull dykes, but are just as nasty.]]

[[Image:tumblr_thefremen.jpg|thumb|right|Some feminists are actually 'men'.]]

Not be confused with real [[Nazi|Nazis]] who were deeply patriarchal and would have thrown feminist cunts into the oven along with the faggots and kikes.

Feminazis like to shave their heads and never shave the rest of their body, because they respect the work of the [[Goddess]]. They wear wife-beaters and combat boots and celebrate how beautiful life is when you realize the wonders of dyke love.
It is well-known scientific fact that all feminazis are fucking lemons.

Many feminazis become [[vegan]] [[hippies]], cook and eat lots of [[cake]], smoke pot, smell wonderfully hormonally full and sing crudely misandrist folk songs at your local [[open mic]].

Most feminists don't like being called feminazis, often giving the argument that they're "not invading Poland." Because, you know, [[bullshit|Nazis haven't existed since World War II ended.]]

[[Feminism]] is one of the leading causes of degeneracy on the [[Internet]] today.

Feminism has also been known to be used by women in conjunction with chivalry.

Feminism can cause lymphoma in men. Just ask David [[Bale]], father of [[Batman]]. Or better yet, don't, [[lol]].

Recently, a new breed of these peculiar creatures has been discovered. These are called "Pseudo Feminazis". They will gladly give you some action if you give them the D. But beware! It's advisable that you acquaint the bitch with your bff roofie first, so she can't scream "RAEP" afterwards. Get some of your buddies to do her with if you want to (not that you have any, you basement dwelling retard).

<center>'''Typical fuck-buckets'''</center>
<center><youtube>zs3I6ISQpZU</youtube></center>

==Feminist LiveJournal Communities==
[[Image:Feminism.jpg|thumb|120px|Feminist literature.]]
Populated entirely by twatarded lesbians and emasculated self-hating men who can't get laid by conventional means, feminist communities on LiveJournal share many qualities, the most notable of which is a group tolerance of dissent previously only demonstrated by Orwell's Ingsoc.

Most of them are self-described "safe spaces for women," which in practice means anything men say is devalued, patronizing, and an attack on their ideological comfort. If you dare broach how patriarchy also hurts men, expect a ten page flame war and personal death threats.

Every member of a feminist community claims to have been raped, molested, or at the very least [[almost raped]]. Why? Sisterhood is all about sharing personal experiences, and if some evil man hasn't forcibly ravaged your cunt, what have you to share? Stories about the mythical "glass ceiling?" No, that was fucking 1970, and the bar has been raised.

As much as feminists would love to prevent [[rape]], they love preventing the prevention of rape even more. Any suggestion that females should have a hand in the prevention of rape is labeled as victim blaming. Thus, when those Riot-grrl bitches paraded around in torn up miniskirts, skimpy tanktops, smudged lipstick, and had a 40 of Olde Englishe in hand, they weren't asking to get some surprise sex. Right...

It is best for men to go to these [[communities]] and stir up some [[lulz]] by means of [http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sea/274495936.html amusing stories such as this.]

==Freebleeding==
[[Image:Freebleeding_00.jpg|right|thumb|That'll teach the patriarchy!]]
[[File:Pussy dreadlocks.jpg|thumb|There's a reason they're called '''dread'''locks]]
Because tampons are a sign of the patriarchy, so wimmin should be able to spread their disgusting vaginajuice-induced blood all over. They should also be able to breastfeed and shit in public. It should be noted that Freebleeding carries all kinds of risks, including [[HNNNNG|septicaemia]] and toxic shock syndrome. The constant flow of blood over the skin is also a major irritant, and no one (in their right mind) would want to walk around with swollen, blood spattered legs.

To really appreciate just how immensely stupid this entire abortion of a concept is, the [[MRA]] equivalent would basically be #Freeboner which would entail encouraging young men to pop a chubby whenever and wherever as its a "natural" process that one should not be ashamed of or be forced to try and hide. Feminists in turn would of course instantly start screeching "almost raped" while running for the nearest hugbox to have a good cry and ensuing circle-shlick with all the other free bleeding moon sisters.

Feminists in the UK have recently taken to freebleeding as [http://www.people.com/article/women-protest-free-bleeding-tampon-tax-uk a protest on tampon taxes], with some of them complaining that the UK does not tax razors, an implement [[no|used exclusively by men]]. It is safe to assume that these women have hairy legs, double dong dildos, sensible shoes, and menstrual dreadlocks.

 
{{cg|Ewww|retch|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Freebleeding_01.jpg
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</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
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</gallery>
|}}
 

==Feminists Are Inherently Violent==
If there's two things feminists always tend to lack it's sensibility and restraint. It could even be argued that feminism is nothing more than just a convenient way for women to legally [[chimp out]] with senseless vaginal invested violence. In one recent occurrence a group of half naked bull dykes openly assaulted a group of unarmed, archbishops and had to be forcibly restrained before they were able to reach the point of digging on into their ass cracks for crap to catapult at the closeted Christian clerics.

<center>
{{frame|{{center|{{Photoframe|wuhoo|border: 2px solid pink; padding: 5px; background-color: pink;|font-weight: bold;
|[[File:Feminism_-_Archbishop_Attack_-_01.jpg]]{{center|{{colortext|black|}}}}
|[[File:Feminism_-_Archbishop_Attack_-_02.jpg]]{{center|{{colortext|black|}}}}
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}}}}|border=darkpink|background=pink}}
</center> 

Feminazi steals baby Jesus.

<youtube>IcHPUtpo5Fc</youtube> 

Feminazi attacks [[Putin]] and [[Angela Merkel]].

<youtube>ERSGZO2GKHo</youtube> 

==Contributions and Changes made by Feminists to this World==
[[File:tumbleweed.gif|center]]

==The Future Of Feminism==
[[File:Aldrovandi freak.jpg|thumb|right|150px|A typical bra-burner]]
One of the main reasons that we will [[nevar|never]] be able to have the [[Democrats|Democratic Party]] in power is because <s>[[liberalism]]</s> mental disorder is often tied to feminism, [[faggotry]], and countering intolerance with even more intolerance. If, however, conspiracy theorists manage to [[IRL troll]] enough people into hating the [[Republican]] [[government]], then there will be nothing to counter [[Hillary Clinton]] from going into power. (Assuming the [[Obama|/b/lackup]] doesn't [[rape]] her, <STRIKE>which is highly unlikely at this point.</STRIKE> LOL HE DID IT) Why Hillary? Because [[feminazism|feminazis]] all over the country will have nothing better to do than swamp the voting booths unless their husbands weren't pussy whipped enough to cunt punt them back in the kitchen and bedroom.

Since Hillary is renowned for chopping off her husband's dick and sewing it onto herself, she'll want to spread the principle nationwide and waste all of her salary on funding a scientific project to build an army of Black hermaphroditic dykes in an attempt to make men obsolete, thus fulfilling Solanis's dream. Since most women are dumb enough to follow Hillary because she's the only female candidate running, they'll soon form militias to hunt down men for sport and make room for this new breed of hermaphrodites to spread their disease. [[Japan]] would hopefully intervene by dropping a bunch of bombs wrapped in used school-girl panties all across North America. If you don't want Feminism in the future, rape all women NOW! Except ugly cunts like Oprah with the Minge From Hell and Susan Boyle, who will make your penis disintergrate.
{{clear}}

==[[gb2kitchen|Dealing]] With Feminists (aka How to build Immunity)==
[[File:Cure4feminism.gif|thumb|right|[[Rape|The only known cure for feminism.]]]]
[[Image:Hilarysign.jpg|thumb|right|Stopping the spread of female empowerment at its source]]
[[Image:Lizbound.jpg|thumb|right|The secret desire of most feminists]]
[[File:Patriarchy.png|thumb|Feminists cannot resist being butthurt at the sight of this simple image.]]
[[File:I-don-amp-039-t-care-if-you-are-pans-xual-or-pots-xual-you-are-a-feminazi c 4270615.jpg|thumb]]

In recent times another natural enemy of the feminists emerged in the form of the [[Video Games]] Industry and [[gamer]]s in general, as the epic troll world war about game journalism known as [[Gamergate]] could testify. The aftermath of Gamergate led to the rise of mentally damaged [[retard]]s such as [[Anita Sarkeesian]] who shout "MUH OBJECTIFCATION!!!" whenever Blizzard or Valve releases even a single game depicting supermodels, tits, ass and bikinis, forgetting that we've moved away from the age of Mario. Video games today, far from objectifying women, will always depict women as smart super-athletic badasses who kill a hundred million MEN and will crush the testicles of the inevitably male supervillains, proving that videogames are feminist. If you ever meet a post-Gamergate feminist such as Sarkeesian, kindly remind them that Samus from Metroid, or Lara Croft, make better feminist symbols, and that the third-wavers such as [[Trigglypuff]] are just using objectification as an excuse to be ugly, physically unfit and have severely acidic B.O.

When dealing with a [[feminist]], take careful consideration not to catch their faggotry. Some precautions may include staying away from [[women rights|lesbian]] gatherings and not going to [[12chan]]. If you come into contact with [[emo|one of them]], go home and be [[an hero]] before you spread it to others. The only reason to even look at one is for the purpose of lulz generating. A real shame, because so many college lesbians are really hot, especially those femme genderfuck women. The best way of verbally dealing with a feminazi is to tell her to "shut the fuck up, and pop the kettle on love, 2 sugars thanks". Also, the mention of [[Dick Masterson]] will cause any feminist to [[shit brix|shit a brick]] while masturbating to his sweetass Aviators.
Or you could just find the hole in their logic as seen here:

===Feminazi Gets It===

{|style="margin: auto;"
|<youtube>3lXUd7VxuSA</youtube>
|}
<center>'''Bitch was [[asking for it]].'''</center> 
{{quote|I love the so called [[Retard|intelligent smart women]] getting trashed by the actual smart intelligent man, so many weak men cant even operate there brain, A smart man can expose this rotting filth [[trap]] for what she is, a horribly hurt person that doesnt even remember where she was when she started, if it wasnt for modern life we would throw a [[whore]] like this in a ditch and set her on KILL IT WITH [[FIRE]].|thisgame2}}

 

=== Marc Lepine ===
[[Marc Lepine]] was a 25 year old French Canadian who, in the course of going for [[high score|''le score élevé'']], killed 14 women, wounded 10 women, and <s>wounded 4 men </s> accidentally wounded 4 ''people'' during a feminist extermination at the Universite de Montreal on December 6, 1989. Not able to live with the mistake of nearly destroying 4 innocent men's lives, he tragically ended his own life shortly afterwards. His great deeds will never be forgotten. RIP Marc; even your [[French]] heritage can be forgiven for your contribution to society.

{{squote|Being rather backwards-looking by nature (except for science), the feminists have always enraged me. They want to keep the advantages of women (e.g. cheaper insurance, extended maternity leave preceded by a preventative leave, etc.) while seizing for themselves those of men <nowiki>[. . .]</nowiki> They are so opportunistic they do not neglect to profit from the knowledge accumulated by men through the ages. They always try to misrepresent them every time they can. Thus, the other day, I heard they were honoring the Canadian men and women who fought at the frontline during the world wars. How can you explain that, since women were not authorized to go to the frontline? Will we hear of Caesar's female legions and female galley slaves who of course took up 50% of the ranks of history, though they never existed. A real Casus Belli.|Marc Fromage's pre-suicide scrawlings}}

===Trolling Feminists===

[[File:So+that+comic+has+been+touched+by+a+feminazi.jpg|thumb|Simply show this pic to a fellow feminazi, her tits will sure be angry]]

Because of their [[Mental retardation|severely damaged brains]], Feminists are incredibly easy to troll. It does not take a great deal of imagination or intelligence to troll a Feminazi (which is good, considering that [[you]] have neither of those qualities, but that is beside the point right now.) If you can't have access to a Muslim or a Gamer to exterminate the profoundly retarded cunts, then here are a few ideas to get you to build up your immunity on your own:

* They get raped because they asked for it, as simple as that!

* Neurobiology is always the best way to refute any feminist fantasies of equality. Diregard all their opinions and defend yourself by the fact that men and women are inherently biologically ''different'' and therefore any perspective of similarity is a delusion.

* Tell them that you are using feminism as an excuse for being infertile or too aggressive and stinky for society's tastes.

*Tell her "Quit yer bitchin' get in the [[kitchen]] and make me a [[sammich]]!"

*Remind her that women have never invented or achieved anything of importance, ever.

*Accuse them of "creep shaming" you.

*[[Crapflood]] pictures of bondage porn or any kind of porn that doesn't involve [[BDSM|pussy worship]]

*Tell her that [[truth|men always were and always will be the superior gender]].

*Politely explain to her that most men wouldn't talk to women if they didn't have vaginas.

*When on a man-bashing tirade, remind them that "not all men are bad"

*And that women would be fucked (or rather, ''not fucked'') if men didn't think with their dicks. Look at how men [[war|treat each other]].

*Tell her that you voted for black person or anyone else who opposed Hillary

*"You destroyed Sweden and Japan."

*Example of a typical feminism troll: [http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090104040529AAtaItO] [http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090104040635AAYD9]

*Go to the [[Feminist]] Message board by clicking [http://messages.yahoo.com/Cultures_%26_Community/Groups/Women/forumview?bn=18943567 here] and type in shit like "No one cares about a woman's rights, now shut the fuck up and go make me a sammich."

*<s>Show them {{ytlink|c68ZFHglYLc|this video}}.</s> BALEETED

*Tell them how [[truth|minorities are privileged]], WAKE THE FUCK UP!

*Walk into one of their retarded cult meetings and shout: "Which one of you fine honeybunnies would come back to my place, cook me a nice meal, and [[suck my dick]]?"

*Mention Esthar Villar, quoting the shit out of her book "The Manipulated Male." So lulz-worthy when she wrote it back in the day, she received so many death threats she had to skip town.

*Ask them if you should lock your doors. If they say "yes", accuse them of victim blaming and say "we should just teach [[niggers]] not to steal!"

*Tell them to "man up"

*Equate all feminists with [[Femen]], especially when talking to radical feminists.

*Remind them that [[Pathetic|Elliot Rodger]] killed twice as many men as women, and wanted to kill off the entire male population.

*Tell them that they are amazing visionaries and that you wish that their parents would have believed in abortion as much as they do

==Feminists Are Allergic To Reality==

[[File:Okcupid_feminist_lol.png|300px|thumb|right]]

<center>{{fv|starvids|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;|
<youtube>x64cy3Bcr98</youtube>|<youtube>vLqHv0xgOlc</youtube>
}}</center>

===R.A.P.E. (Revolt Against Penis Envy) Contributing Toward an Understanding of Male/Female Harmony by Boyd Rice===

<center>
{{morphquote|feminaziquotes2|background-color: pink;|font-weight: bold;
|In man an, two kinds of history are fighting for power. In the masculine being, there is a certain contradiction; he is this man, yet he is something else besides, which woman neither understands nor admits, which she feels as robbery and violence upon that which to her is holiest. This secret and fundamental war of the sexes has gone on ever since there were sexes, and will continue-silent, bitter, unforgiving, pitiless…|'''Oswald, ''The Decline of the West''

|In the sixties, talk of a “war between the sexes” was very popular. In point of fact, what was being described was not a war at all, merely the recognition of a change in the balance that had previously existed between the two sexes. The grip of man’s domination was loosening, and women rushed forward to take advantage of the situation. The natural relationship which had hitherto existed between man and woman was put under increasing strain by the shift in balance and was rapidly evolving into an ever-more-adversarial coalition.

But war?

War is the variety of violence which one traditionally resorts to when all other means of asserting his dominance have been exhausted. There was no war between the sexes in the sixties simply because man had long since ceased to assert his dominance by any means. It is precisely this male backsliding which gave rise to the tension which was misconstrued as war, and which has grown steadily worse until today. Perhaps a war will be necessary to bridge the abyss across which the sexes stare mistrustingly at each other.|'''Harry P. Ness'''

|Woman is a temple… built over a sewer.|'''[[Christfag|Tertullian]]'''}}
</center>

spoiler alert, Hitler sis everything to stop feminism but you had to spoil it all, you anglo scum.

===[-+] [[RAPE]]===
<div id="mw-customcollapsible-tldr" class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed">
At one time, all was right with the world. It was lorded over by men who imposed their will by force. Women kept their mouths shut, underlings knew their place, and those who opposed the prevailing order had their heads cut off. So far, so good. In this bygone Golden Age, sadistic values determined the quality of life. Sadistic values are exclusively male values, values predicated not upon baseless intellectual abstractions or wishful thinking, but upon hard biological truths.

One such truth involves testosterone, the hormone responsible for shaping the male character. It lies at the root of man’s aggression and domination and has consequently played the key role in shaping mankind’s history.

And the history of mankind is, quite simply, the history of man. It is the story of his creativity and his daring. It is the story of his strength, his courage, and his invention. Every great idea, great empire, or great undertaking has been the byproduct of man and man alone. History’s great epochs are those in which male domination and male force reigned supreme.

Just as testosterone ordained man’s preeminent role as creator and master of world history, woman’s position was likewise decided by her hormonal predisposition. Estrogen lies at the center of the feminine character, and it is this hormone, says science, that is responsible for woman’s overabundance of emotion and apparent lack of logic. This primary biological difference is the basis of what is commonly referred to as sexual differentiation.

Woman is quick to embrace the concept of sexual/hormonal differentiation when she can use it to her advantage – to explain, for instance, why men are such brutes. But when the same criteria are applied to explain her own shortcomings, she dismisses it as a cruel construct invented by man to discredit her. She is far more comfortable with feelings than with facts. Facts, in her opinion, are made by man in the image of man, to be used against her, to keep her down. When confronted by the cold reality of facts, woman’s emotions fly into a tizzy, and her emotions have no origin in the intellect, or in instinct, or in any sort of observation or deductive reasoning. They are instead a primordial amalgam of overblown hopes and fears, childish fantasies carried to absurd extremes.

As reactions to external realities, her emotions make no apparent sense. Only when recognized as the byproduct of an overwhelming internal reality-that of estrogen-do her emotions and perceptions finally begin to become comprehensible.

In a once – glorious past, woman was a creature without rights, a second – class citizen. In some places, she wasn’t considered a citizen at all – she was property. She was part cook, part whore, part servant, and all child. So what has changed to put woman on an equal footing with man, deserving of the same rights and privileges? Has woman herself changed? Decidedly not. Not in temperament, character, or ability. She is the same creature she has always been, with the sad addition of some rather unflattering conceits.

It is not woman’s advancement in the realm of character which has facilitated her upward mobility – rather, it is man’s loss of character. She has gained ground only because he has lost ground. And why has he lost ground? Because the white male has been bamboozled. He has been shamed into submission and made to feel guilty about his aggression and his will-to-power. But are not aggression and the will-to-power part and parcel of his character, stamped upon his soul by nature itself? Are they not in fact the very things which once ordained his greatness?

Modern woman would have us believe that she has been oppressed by countless centuries of male domination. Can this be true? She would have us believe that her standing was the outcome of some arbitrary bit of whimsy, concocted spitefully by man and imposed maliciously (unfairly!) upon woman.

Was woman forcibly held back by the superior strength and intellect of man, or was she simply in an “inferior” position due to some lack of those qualities within herself? Was it man who chose a second class existence for woman, or was it, in fact, nature? Man sought only to act in accordance with the reality dictated by nature’s wisdom.

Woman, in her bitterness, blamed man for the position in which she found herself. This was surely his doing. He had cruelly cheated her out of all that was rightfully hers. The cad! Allowing her emotions to run wild (as usual), woman blamed man for all the world’s ills, attacking male values at every opportunity. Ironically, it was the collapse and disappearance of male values which permitted woman’s rise to begin with. The “domination” which she so fervently attacked had, for all intents and purposes, long since vanished from public life. The positive, aggressive male values behind every step of upward evolution have been superseded by a soft and passive female ethic.

What can be done to subdue the sickly sway of feminine values? How can we silence the interminable whining of feminism’s sob sisters? In a nutshell: Woman must be put back in her place. Man’s great error was to put woman on a pedestal, when she is far more at ease on her knees - where she belongs. The only way to subdue feminine values is by subduing the female herself. Woman must be reacquainted with truth and force. She must be reacquainted with truth through force.

Since woman is above all an emotional creature, appeals to her “intellect” are worthless. She must be shown in no uncertain terms the absolute nature of the master/slave relationship endemic to the sexes. What plainer way to demonstrate this relationship than the simple act of rape? This primary act reveals beyond a reasonable doubt certain irrefutable verities: Man is taller, woman is smaller. Man is strong, woman is weak. Man is master, woman is not.

The ritual we now call marriage originated as abduction, rape, and enslavement. In those happy-go-lucky days, one’s rights were not mere abstractions based on legislation, but rather the outcome of what could be imposed by physical force alone. Force was recognized as truth in action, and the outcome of force was acknowledged as justice. Although this principle has been widely disavowed, it’s truth is as absolute now as it ever was.

And the only truth a woman is capable of understanding is that which she can feel wholly within the depths of her childlike emotions. At one time, those emotions could be swayed by the sweet notion of romance, but her envy has long since destroyed that. These days, the only way to restore balance between the sexes is by fear and pain. Fear commands respect, and pain demands understanding (read: compliance).

Rape is the act by which fear and pain are united in love. It is the triumph of harmony through oppression.

Rape teaches balance, the natural balance of man=above/woman=below. This balance is a lesson which woman must learn, and only man can teach her.

The only way to teach subjugation is through hands on oppression. And woman must learn subjugation. The only way to teach submission is through active domination. And woman must learn submission. She must be brought down to her natural kneeling position. She must be returned to the bottom, where she’s happiest. Only then may man be happy once more.

If it takes war to reinstate this happiness, then let there be war. Not a war between the sexes, but a war of the sexes, against the pernicious doctrine of sexual equality. And if the chief weapon in this war is rape, then let there be rape. Let there be triumphant male force riding roughshod over woman and her values. Let there be brutal male force instructing and enlightening woman in absolute terms. Each rape is but a battle in a war. And each battle won is but a link in a glorious chain – a chain which will one day be used to keep woman in her naturally ordained place – beneath man.

But enough of talk. The time for words is over. The time for action has come. Now is the time to rise up. Now is the time to go forth. Now is the time to educate. Now is the time to subjugate. Now is the time to dominate. Now is the time to rape. Now is the time to rape. Now is the time to rape. Let the Revolt Against Penis Envy commence. Go forth! Rise up! Rape! Rape! Rape!

Long live oppression!

Long live love!

Long live rape!
</div>

=== How feminists will cage all men ===
<div style="height:10em; overflow-y:scroll; box-shadow:0 0 10px inset; border-radius:5px; background-color:#eee; padding:1em;">
Let's take a look at how feminists can achieve caging all men through shortcut thinking and slowly shifting the meaning of the term sexual abuse.

In 1990 the definition of sexual abuse against a woman might have been something like "PHYSICAL sexual actions against her will, for example touching her genitals, breasts, kissing her and so on". Here feminists start a campaign and force everyone to state they're against sexual abuse, and indeed, most people do because indeed it's not good to physically sexually bully someone, there is little reason for anyone to disagree. Here they establish a shortcut "sexual abuse = bad", which at this stage is not harmful yet. However they slowly start changing the definition of sexual abuse.

By 2000 the new definition of sexual abuse may additionally also include VERBAL actions, such as asking a girl about her sexual life. Here we'll already starting to limit free speech but most people didn't notice the subtle change in the definition of sexual abuse, they just remember they're against sexual abuse.

By 2010 the definition of sexual abuse will also include ANY PHYSICAL action such as any touching at all -- if you touch a woman's hand against her will, you're committing sexual abuse. But most people still only remember they're against sexual abuse, whatever it means -- additionally the few people that notice and criticize the changes in definition start to be bullied for supporting sexual abuse or are told to shut up and not make big deal of a small change in definitions. The changes happen slowly so that at no point people notice a sudden jump which they could protest -- individuals may protest on occasion but one man can do nothing and there will happen no sudden change that would synchronize a mass protest.

By 2020 sexual abuse will include practically any action towards a woman which the woman dislikes in any way, such as making eye contact, talking, smiling, holding door open for her, sending her a friend request on social media sites and so on. Now men are bullied, they're scared of just meeting a woman and talking to her -- if the woman decides it's sexual abuse, it is. But if you ask anyone "Are you against sexual abuse?" of course he has to answer "yes" -- answering "no" is absurd because everyone is against sexual abuse, no matter that definition now is completely different from the original definition, it's just the power of words that can keep people approve of and support insanity.

Soon enough it will be observed that practically all men are sexual abusers because sexual abuse now means just interacting with women and basically all men want to or even just have to interact with women in some way. Now feminists may say: since gender studies proved all men are sexually dangerous, it is "logical" that we have to cage all men, it would be insane to let predators run free, right? And just like that we arrive at our dystopia.

If you think they can't do it, [https://www.tastyfish.cz/lrs/yes_they_can.html you are wrong].
</div>
<ref>[https://www.tastyfish.cz/lrs/shortcut_thinking.html LRS Wiki: shortcut_thinking] by Miloslav Číž - content available under CC0 1.0 (public domain)</ref>

==Gallery==

{{cg||cuntmad|center|<gallery perrow="6">
File:MvW.jpg|This is how [[feminist]]s see the world.
File:Cuntfire.jpg
File:Ela_Thier.jpg|Feminism = plot to give ugly bitches access to mainstream society
File:Feminism_-_How_To_Enrage_Feminazis.png|This is especially fruitful for trolling "Slut Walk" pages/sites.
File:Feminism_-_Fairness_In_The_Workplace.jpg
File:SecretFeministWeapon.jpg|[https://www.xojane.com/fun/my-secret-feminist-weapon Beware of feminist chemical weapons against men].
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="6">
File:Feminism_-_Flyer.jpg
File:Feminism Effects.jpg
File:Feminism_-_Stop_Starring_At_My_Man-Tits.jpg
File:ScreenShots.png
File:Wimminz monopoly.jpg
File:Mother vs father rights.jpg|Look at all this male privilege.
File:Feminism_-_Blames_Others.jpg
File:Feminism_-_Encourages_Women.jpg
File:Shoulditberape.jpg|There is no escaping rape culture
File:Feminism_-_Feminist_Mothers_Don't_Believe_In_Breast_Feeding.jpg
File:1st_World_Problems_&_Feminism_-_True_Victims.jpg
File:Hardcore Man Bitch.jpg|What you can expect to become if she escapes from the kitchen and gets her otherwise empty head filled with too many crazy ideas
File:Donotwantfeminist.jpg
File:Harem Inc.png|Harem Inc
File:Feminism_-_The_Real_Truth.jpg
File:Billionsofcunts.jpg
File:Feminist Army.jpg
File:Feminist Puter Comic.png
File:Feminist Pillow Talk.png
File:Sharpieinfatasspooper.jpg|Feminist sticks sharpie in pooper
File:4chor8chpolcatlady.png
File:Femvslogiccomic.png
File:300dicks.jpg|You suck 300+ dicks and you wonder why you can't find a beta provider?
File:Alimonyforexgf.jpg|Live in the west? Expect to pay alimony for having a girlfriend.
File:Arguingwithholes.jpg|Arguing with [[Vagoo|holes]].
File:Baecunt5838343.jpg|When women are allowed to drive.
File:Findmyself.png|Finding myself~
File:Muhdiversity.png|Muh diversity~
File:Allfeminists.jpg
File:Feminism Was Always Bad.png
File:121Femaleprivilege.png
File:Polvaginas.png|Pol/ vs Vagoo
File:Titsorfuckinggtfo.png|Tits or fucking GTFO
File:ERquote.jpg|Based [[Elliot Rodger|Elliot]] on womyn.
File:Fatbitch666.jpg|TOP KEK
File:Fruitoffeminism.jpg
File:Realman.png
File:40 and still not married.jpeg
File:FeminismB4A4.png
File:Beefcurtain.jpg
File:Feminist Chart.jpg
File:Feminazi Americunt Chimpout.jpg
File:Feminist door.jpg
File:Feminist Response To Draft.jpg|Feminist Response to Draft
File:Feminismdotexe.png
File:Burgerfeminism.jpg
File:Dating A Feminist.jpg
File:Liberalslollllll.jpg
File:Singlemothers12348128321.jpg
File:Origin and Development of a Feminist.jpg
File:Singlemothers2232323232.jpg
File:Femifagbitches.jpg|Women.exe
File:Uglyvshotnerd.jpg|How girls see [[You]], compared to geeky celebrities.
File:Victimresponsibilities.jpg|What will happen to you if you are a victim to any sexual assault by a woman.
File:Degenerateslut.jpg|The story of a generic degenerate whore feminazi
File:Femalelogiclol.png|Feminist "Logic"
File:Feminism8248343.jpg|Fembabbling fact #6
File:Haterape.jpg|The truth about raep
File:Malepriv623.png|Male "Privilege"
File:Redditcuckfaggots.png|Reddit cuck's story post-feminazi gf lol
File:Womanbrainlolz.jpg|Woman "Brain"
File:Nutshellfeminism.jpg|Feminism summed up
File:Feminismthenandnow33.jpg|Feminism then and now
File:Feminazibitch.jpg|Feminist bitch gets smacked back, and cries about it.
File:Publichousing844.jpg|Females vs male privilege
File:Feministwhore.jpg|Claire's cunty mannerisms.
File:Oldnavywhore.jpg|Girls even get shirt privelige too!
File:Femalepriveligepedo.jpg|Are you female? A pedophile? Don't expect any punishment! [[Allison Rapp]] is a prime example.
File:Stacybitch.jpg|A literal stacy IRL.
File:Stupidwhorediebitchdieeee.jpg
File:HURTFEMINISM.jpg
File:Gender War.jpg
File:I Hate White Men.jpg
File:Be A Slave Or A Mother.jpg
File:Allwomenaresavagebeastsss.jpg
File:Womenaresavgemnstrs.jpg
File:Stupidbitchcuntdieho.png
File:Americanpsychokill.jpg
File:Standardsofwomen.png|Female "Logic"
File:Hilarity.jpg|Certain people can be considered bullshit at all times.
File:Superior wimminz.png
File:Feminist Monthly.jpg|Feminist Monthly
File:Criticize feminism.jpg
File:BettyFreidan.png|Betty Friedan (née:Goldstein){{Jew}} writer of [[TL;DR|The Feminine Mystique]] aka the Feminist [[Koran]]
File:Aposematism.jpg|Fair warning.
File:Feminism_Looks_Like_This.jpg
File:Vaginal_Shield.jpg|Cyber-Feminist Protection Unit.
File:368.jpg
File:Modern Feminism.jpg|[[Terrorist|Femorrists]]
File:Hooters.jpg|It's not hard to see the differences.
File:Wecantbake.jpg|If you can't bake, you better know how to suck a mean dick.
File:Feminists Gossip.jpg
File:Gamers_according_to_feminists_internet_aristocrat_zoe_quinn_five_guys_burgers_and_fries.jpg|[[Zoe Quinn|Thank you ISIS.]]
File:funnyfeminists.jpg
File:Feminism2011.jpg
File:Feminism_Gender_Studies_Degree.png
File:Feminism_Whole_Pie.jpg
File:Feminism_911.jpg
File:Feminism_Logic.jpg
File:What Feminists Think of Gay Porn.png|The female perspective on faggotry.
File:Shotgun wedding by hypergoldfish.jpg
File:1466560.jpg
File:Grammar-nazi-amp-gt-feminazi c 4073449.jpg
File:Feminazis-Karina-Billa-2014.jpg
File:995677 5223580.jpg
File:ZhDuwPH.jpg
File:Bitter femi nazi cartoon by conservatoons-d4g210k.jpg
File:Feminazism lmao.jpg
File:Familycourtcartoon.png
File:Classic feminazi 540.jpg
File:Femi4chandate.png
File:Rtfdsf.jpg|lol ever wondered what happens between the femies themselves?
File:Feminazies circumsize swedish lion military emblem.jpg|Castration is still relevant even if it's not a living being
File:Bb4saleukraine.jpg|Ukrainian femen activist offers pre-order of her baby
File:Kill-joys-kastle-main.jpg|femanist hood rats gang
File:57076027.jpg
File:Something right femies.png|This girl has no self respect and loves being raped - according to feminists
File:Anonymous feminist lel.jpg| lol
File:Ghujjrhjhsy.jpg
File:Falserapeaccusationinaction.png
File:Wagegaphorse.jpg
File:Bradford-1980.jpg
File:Feminazi Symbol 1.gif
File:Womens rights.jpg
File:Feminism_in_action.jpg
File:Missedthejoke.jpg‎|Another successful trolling.
File:Feminists fail western society.jpg|Arguments for serious discussion
File:Feminist degree fukjeh.jpg|SEIG HEIL
File:Feminazi_Bullshit.png|This is what Feminists like to believe.
File:Yahoo feminist lmao.jpg|This ugly motherfucker should also be castrated via steel shark teeth of the FEMINATOR!!
File:Feferi.jpg
File:Fem-anal.jpg
File:FalseRapeEvidence.gif
File:ManImprisonedFor28YearsAllegationDreamRape.jpg
File:UnderageSexSocietyDifferences.jpg
File:Feminism_-_Only_Rape_For_Women_01.jpg|Feminist "equality" all up in this bitch.
File:Feminism_-_Only_Rape_For_Women_02.jpg
File:Feminism_-_Only_Rape_For_Women_03.jpg
File:Totallywasntaskingforit.png|It's ALWAYS rape! Even when it isn't!
File:Feminism_-_Graffiti_Edit.jpg
File:Feminism Female Brain.jpg
File:Feminism Hair Styles.jpg
File:Modern feminism.gif
File:Feminism Liberal Western Values.jpg
File:Feminism Screaming At Men.jpg
File:Feminism Jewish Corruption And Influence.png
File:Feminism nasty Witch.png
File:Feminism Object.jpg
File:Feminism Demands Prince Charming.jpg
File:Feminism Dressing.png
File:White knights are fuckin bitches.jpg
File:What do I want to fight about today.jpg
File:Feminism Alcohol and Female Responsibility.jpg
File:I need feminism because.jpg
File:Shark Brain VS Vagina.jpg
File:All women want from you is everything.jpg
File:These arent the rights I wanted.png
File:I need feminism cuz.jpg
File:Cant Handle Strong Women.jpg
File:JOHN cLEESE ON eXTREMISM.jpg
File:Toiletbro.jpg
File:Feminist Warrior IRL.jpg
File:Feminism Equality Misinformed.jpg
File:Rays Pest Control.jpg
File:Men pls help.png
File:Feminism Teacher Irony.png
File:Feminism Dining.jpg
File:Feminists_Pissing_Hypocrisy.jpg
File:How_To_Disable_A_Female_Rapist.jpg|How to disable a female rapist.
File:How_To_Enrage_Feminists.jpg|How to enrage feminists.
File:Tampon_Opression.png
File:EmoFatFeminist.jpg|And fucking fat.
File:Koreanfeminazi.jpg|typical [[korean]] feminazi
File:Typicalkoreafemi.jpg|typical [[korean]] feminazi 2
File:Women - chivalry when they like it, sexism when they don't.jpg
File:Dongduk.jpg|thumb|Typical Korean Feminists' Protest Method
</gallery>
|}}

==Femies On Video Games==
<center>
{|
|[[File:Feminists on video games.png|400px|center]]
||
{{center|<youtube>xQkENXa9WNE</youtube>}} ''Incidentally, this is Sam Maggs, who is the '''assistant editor at [[TheMarySue]]'''''
|}</center>

<center>Feminist Video Games are SOCIAL JUSTICE</center>

{{center|<youtube>MkBbIF6ZXhw</youtube>}}

[[File:Terminate feminazi.png|thumb|center|300px|Feminazi game - "Feminator: Castration"]]

==In Conclusion==

[[File:Femitallica kill em all.jpg|center]]

==See Also==
[[Image:Rape poster2.jpg|thumb|right| Feminists slogan should be "No NEVER means no".]]
[[File:Feminism PTSD Melody Triggered.jpg|thumb|right|Because having anyone say you're wrong is RAPE.]]
[[File:ZoeAnitaUNbitchin.png|thumb|right|[[Anita Sarkeesian|Anita]] and [[Zoe Quinn|Zoe]] tell their [[First World Problems|super important womyns issues]] to the UN.]]
*[[Feminist]]
*[[Meninism]] — Men attempt to fight back against feminism and fail. Poorly.
*[[MRA]] — Men attempt to fight back against feminism and fail. Horribly.
*[[Nu-male]] — [[Pussies|Men]] with [[white guilt]] attempt to side with feminism and fail. Pathetically, and humiliated.
*[[Questionable logic]] — the ''only'' way this can be justified.
*[[Social Justice]]

'''Issues:'''

*[[Bitch]]es (and [[Bitches and whores|whores]])
*[[Castration]]
*[[Christina Hoff Sommers]] - GamerGate's favorite based mom.
*[[Cotton Ceiling]]
*[[Cunt]]
*[[Fat Princess]] — A video game that's already got feminist knickers in a twist.
*[[Femen]]
*[[GamerGate]]
*[[Gynaeolatry]]
*[[Kill it with Fire]]
*[[Kitchen]]
*[[Lesbian]]
*[[Domestic Violence]]
*[[Misogyny]]
*[[Pain]]
*[[Pinterest]] — Feminazi motivational posters everywhere.
*[[Please]]
*[[Politics and the city]] — A website intended to get women more interested in politics, but which correctly assumes that unless it's pink and fluffy then women won't be interested.
*[[Rape Checklist]]
*[[Vagina dentata]] — Their ultimate weapon
*[[Video Games]]

'''People:'''

*[[Adria Richards]]
*[[Andrea Dworkin]] CLASSIC SCREAMER in the 1970s and 80s, and makes everyone else in this list look like whiny scrota
*[[Anita Sarkeesian]] — The [[Sheneequa|Rosa Parks]] of Videogames Feminism.
*[[Brianna Wu]]
*[[Charlotte E. Smith]]
*[[Cheryl Abbate]] — puts the "[[Nazi]]" in "[[feminazi]]"
*[[Cheryl Lindsey Seelhoff]]
*[[Cynthia]]
*[[Dick Masterson]] — the anti-feminist
*[[Gail Dines]]
*[[GoddessMine]]
*[[Kesha]] — Further evidence that a well timed rape accusation can be beneficial to one's career.
*[[Lena Chen]] — 1) Sucked deancock to get into Harvard. 2) Advocated "Fuck Me" Feminism. 3) Posted her teacher [[Patrick Hamm]]'s cum on her face ([[:File:Lena_Chen_Facial.jpg|SRSly]]). 4) Got booted from Harvard. 5) ??? 6) PROFIT!!1
*[[Lena Dunham]] — because [[baby fuck|molesting]] your [[incest|sister]] is [[Lesbian pedophilia|feminist]].
*[[Liz Hawryluk]]
*[[Femitheist]]
*[[Mikeeusa]] — a valiant defender of the rights of woman
*[[Miriam Weeks]] — aka the Duke Porn Slut (Belle Knox)
*[[Mary Bell]] 10-year-old-girl that killed abd cut iff little boys' dicks
*[[Pinkiepony]] — The [[Hitler|Avril Lavigne]] of the brony fandom.
*[[Rebecca Watson]] — The Empress of [[Atheism+]]. Victim of being [[almost raped|hit on]] in a elevator.
*[https://www.google.com/search?q=Jess+Zimmerman&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8 Jess Zimmerman] - [http://web.archive.org/web/20141222120330/http://thepunditpress.com/2014/12/17/the-guardian-author-all-men-should-be-murdered/ Wants to kill] [http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/dec/16/ban-men-2014-women-misandry every man on the planet.] [[Srs bzns|Watch out, we got a badass over here]]
*[[Zarna Joshi]]
*[[Zoe Quinn]] - Fucked five guys in exchange for positive reviews on her shitty text indie "game" and to advance her current career.

'''Sites:'''

*[[Bioware]]
*[[Feminist Frequency]]
*[[ihatemen]]
*[[Jezebel]]
*[[Mumsnet]]
*[[NeoGAF]] - A hivemind full of delusional nu-male feminists
*[[RadFemSpeak.net]]
*[[ResetERA]]
*[[Shakesville]] — Feminist blog, run by Melissa McEwan, who happens to be fat, unsurprisingly
*[[SoSuave.net]] — feminist take on a [[retard]]ed pick-up advice site
*[[Tumblr]]
*[[Twitter]]
*[[The Mary Sue]]

==External Links==
[[File:Wikipedia category jew feminists.jpg|right|350px]]
*{{ljcomm|user=feminist}} - The LJ Feminist community. (Livejournal lol, also not updated since 2015)
*{{ljcomm|user=feminist_rage}} - Feminist Rage community, mainly devoted to [[Almost raped|rants]]. (Last update 2010 lol)
*{{ljcomm|user=feminazis}} - The true center of feminazi thought, the last redoubt of pure and unabashed [[feminazism]]. (Also not updated since 2010)
*{{dauser|razorwitch|Yet another feminist TARTlet}} (lol left in 2008 COWARD)
*[http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=feminazi Maddox debunks feminism]
*[http://www.womansavers.com boo hoo he fucked me and now he never calls, feminazis attack] (lol abandoned in 2014)
*[http://www.jesus-is-savior.com/Evils%20in%20America/Feminism/feminism_is_evil.htm Christian "heroes" expose feminism.]
*[http://blogfiles.wfmu.org/BL/0511/im/14_-_Kathy_Fire_-_Mother_Rage.mp3 Kathy Fire - MOTHERRAGE The Feminist National Anthem --You're long overdue for your hour of castration!!]
*[http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=2838369 TSR sexist thread started by a butthurt femenazi bitch that needs to STFU] (lol 2014)
*{{ytlink|ucO4ijwOUN8|Feminist BAWWWWW}}
*[http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=2838437 MOAR FEMENAZI RANTING! THE BUTTHURT CONTINUES!!!!1!11!]
*[http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/member.php?u=1548227 Feel free to troll the shit out of this whore...]
*[http://feministing.com/ Typical Feminist Website] (At least it's still being updated)
*[http://everydayfeminism.com/courses/ Feminists Trying too hard] (to masturbate)
*[http://www.gynarchy.org/ More Failure: a group promoting "Lesbian Supremacy"] (last update 2017)
*[http://www.womanthouartgod.com/hillaryprayintooffice.php Pray Hillary into Office] [[Slowpoke | Still there as of 2018!! LOLOLOL]]
*[http://future.wikia.com/wiki/RyansWorld:_Matriarchy Troll or SRS BSNS? The Feminazi Agenda] (loads of WTF)
*[http://www.manwomanmyth.com/ Tons of videos by random Britfag exposing the bullshit of Feminism] (nevermind, went down in 2015)
*[http://alphagameplan.blogspot.com/2013/07/why-feminized-societies-will-fail.html Why Feminism is FAIL, explained]
*http://answers.yahoo.com/dir/index;_ylt=Auy90HPmVJEzxyqVJbAo0ywjzKIX;_ylv=3?sid=396545307 'Gender and Women's Studies' - a feminazi propaganda category on the website 'Yahoo! Answers'. Much ''lulz'' ensues. (whups baleeted)
*http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/sian-dixon/twitter-abuse-isnt-a-censorship-issue_b_3682528.html
*http://web.archive.org/web/20141222120330/http://thepunditpress.com/2014/12/17/the-guardian-author-all-men-should-be-murdered/ - [[BRB|brb, slaughtering all men]] (lol deleted)
*http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/dec/16/ban-men-2014-women-misandry - [[ALL CAPS|MEN ARE SCUM, KILL THEM ALL]] (yeah whatev)
* [http://radicalprofeminist.blogspot.co.uk/ "This blog exists to support liberatory collectivist activism that is anti-patriarchy, anti-colonialism, and anti-capitalism. It also seeks to center the experiences, theories, and agendas of radical and feminist women of color."] - not a parody. Sample: "Thank goodness he was caught doing such vile violence (vile-lence) to her. Sexual violence has a long raced, classed history in Amerikkka, against women white and Black, Brown, and Indigenous."
* [http://www.thelocal.se/20161114/mansplaining-campaign-faces-sexism-backlash In an effort to combat 'mansplaining', a phenomenon in which men talk down to womben as if wummin are incapable of thinking for themselves,] a hotline has been set up in Sweden so that strong independent womyn who are experiencing such pernicious Patriarchal patronising can be [[Irony|told the best way to respond to it.]]

{{Retarded Edit Wars}}
{{Psychology}}
{{jews}}
{{truth}}
{{Social Justice}}

AND NOW... the punchline: {{colortext|white|You know how sometimes women just want to have a good old moan, and aren't expecting you to do anything, and then once they've offloaded they are quite happy again, until the next time they want to whinge to someone? Congratulations: you understand how to react to feminism.}}

== References ==
<references />

[[Category:Subcultures]]
[[Category:WikiEdit Drama]]

PUBG: Battlegrounds

2026-05-15T13:51:26Z

Gooksu:

{{Crapstub}}

PUBG: BATTLEGROUNDS (A.K.A. "Walking Simulator 2017")
PUBG: BATTLEGROUNDS (formerly known as PlayerUnknown's Battlegrounds) is a high-stakes, multiplayer "Looting & Dying" simulator developed by Krafton.

It is best known for its revolutionary approach to gaming: making players spend 20 minutes looking for a backpack, only to be shot in the back of the head by a guy hiding in a bathroom with a double-barrel shotgun.

The Premise: Murder for Poultry
The goal is simple: 100 people are thrown out of a cargo plane with nothing but their underwear and a prayer. You land on an island, scavenge for rusted [[Soviet]]-era weaponry, and try to stay inside a shrinking blue circle that smells like electricity and death. The last person standing is awarded a virtual chicken dinner, which has zero nutritional value and will not satisfy the hunger you've developed during the 40-minute match.

{{Gaming}}
{{Korea}}

PUBG: Battlegrounds

2026-05-15T13:50:55Z

Gooksu:

{{Crapstub}}

PUBG: BATTLEGROUNDS (A.K.A. "Walking Simulator 2017")
PUBG: BATTLEGROUNDS (formerly known as PlayerUnknown's Battlegrounds) is a high-stakes, multiplayer "Looting & Dying" simulator developed by Krafton.

It is best known for its revolutionary approach to gaming: making players spend 20 minutes looking for a backpack, only to be shot in the back of the head by a guy hiding in a bathroom with a double-barrel shotgun.

The Premise: Murder for Poultry
The goal is simple: 100 people are thrown out of a cargo plane with nothing but their underwear and a prayer. You land on an island, scavenge for rusted Soviet-era weaponry, and try to stay inside a shrinking blue circle that smells like electricity and death. The last person standing is awarded a virtual chicken dinner, which has zero nutritional value and will not satisfy the hunger you've developed during the 40-minute match.

{{Gaming}}
{{Korea}}

PUBG: Battlegrounds

2026-05-15T13:50:21Z

Gooksu: Created page with "PUBG: BATTLEGROUNDS (A.K.A. "Walking Simulator 2017") PUBG: BATTLEGROUNDS (formerly known as PlayerUnknown's Battlegrounds) is a high-stakes, multiplayer "Looting & Dying" simulator developed by Krafton. It is best known for its revolutionary approach to gaming: making players spend 20 minutes looking for a backpack, only to be shot in the back of the head by a guy hiding in a bathroom with a double-barrel shotgun. The Premise: Murder for Poultry The goal is simple: 1..."

PUBG: BATTLEGROUNDS (A.K.A. "Walking Simulator 2017")
PUBG: BATTLEGROUNDS (formerly known as PlayerUnknown's Battlegrounds) is a high-stakes, multiplayer "Looting & Dying" simulator developed by Krafton.

It is best known for its revolutionary approach to gaming: making players spend 20 minutes looking for a backpack, only to be shot in the back of the head by a guy hiding in a bathroom with a double-barrel shotgun.

The Premise: Murder for Poultry
The goal is simple: 100 people are thrown out of a cargo plane with nothing but their underwear and a prayer. You land on an island, scavenge for rusted Soviet-era weaponry, and try to stay inside a shrinking blue circle that smells like electricity and death. The last person standing is awarded a virtual chicken dinner, which has zero nutritional value and will not satisfy the hunger you've developed during the 40-minute match.

{{Gaming}}
{{Korea}}

Battlefield

2026-05-15T13:46:42Z

Gooksu:

[[File:Respawning History.png|thumb|right|Battlefield V [[in a nutshell]].]]
Which "'''Battlefield'''" do you want?

*[[Battlefield 2]]
*[[Battlefield 2142]]
*[[Battlefield Heroes]]
*[[Battlefield: Bad Company 2]]
*[[Battlefield Play4Free]]
*[[Battlefield 3]]
*[[Battlefield 3|Battlefield 4]]
*[[Battlefield 3|Battlefield Hardline]]
*[[Battlefield 1]]
*[[Battlefield Earth]]
*[[Social Justice|Battlefield]] [[Vagina|V]]
*[[Battlefield 2042]]
*[[Battlefield 6]]
{{disambig}}

Blue Archive

2026-05-15T13:44:25Z

Gooksu: /* See also */

{{Crapstub}}
The Blue Archive is a game created by [[Gook]] of the [[Good Korea|South korean]] game company Nexon, which seeks money from [[Weebs]] and [[Pedophiles]].
{{pedophile}}

== See also ==

* [[Korea]]
* [[Japan]]
* [[Anime]]
* [[Maplestory]]
* [[Mabinogi]]
* [[Genshin Impact]]
* [[Lolicon]]
* [[Pedophiles]]
* [[Weeb]]

{{Anime}}
{{Gaming}}
{{Dying Alone}}
{{Korea}}
{{Japan}}
{{Pedoseries}}

Mabinogi

2026-05-15T13:43:07Z

Gooksu: /* External Links */

{{spoilers|ONLY THE MOST DIEHARD BASEMENT DWELLERS CARE ABOUT THIS GAME ANYMORE!}}

{{achtung|THIS GAME HAS LOTS OF PORN}}
[[Image:Mabinogi Nao.jpg|thumbnail|right|DO IT NAO. ([[I See What You Did There|See what I did thar?]])]]
''[[Mabinogi]]'' is a [[shit|shitty]] [[Korean]] [[MMORPG]] by the same guys who did ''[[Maple Story|MapleStory]]''. ''Mabinogi'' is popular with 12 to 16 year olds who have no money and cannot play ''[[World of Warcraft]]''. It is also popular with the [[weeaboo]] community largely due to its strong anime themes. (Note that if this sounds at all familiar, [[Ragnarok Online|it should]].)

==Gameplay==
The game plays a lot like ''Ragnarok Online'', which plays a lot like ''Diablo'', which plays a lot like a number of old SSI computer games. Move the mouse, click the enemy, kick its ass, and repeat until you die of old age or [[suicide|kill yourself]].

You can go fishing to raise your dexterity, but it takes about 9,000 years before you can go up a rank in it. The game revolves around [[Boring|training your skills]], then spending AP to raise them. The more you do it, the harder and harder (Read: More money you spend) it gets to actually raise it, and it will cost [[moar]] AP.

With a name like [[Otaku|Fantasy Life]] going for it, you can bet that people do treat it like it is their only life. You can make an ugly female character and buy a [[Fetish|maid outfit]] and learn how to cook and pretend you are an actual anime woman! You can buy an explorers outfit and grind exploration levels (Which reset every time you rebirth, meaning you have to keep doing [[boring]] quests over and over again)

It's full of incredible amounts of busy-work that you just don't want to do. If you're not leveling, you're probably [[Boring|grinding]] for materials that go for absurd amounts on the in-game market. NPCs don't give you squat if you sell anything to them, so don't bother. But the [[Asshole|assholes]] [[Fags|will turn around and overprice certain items regardless]]. If not that, you're probably trying to gain [[E-peen|proficiency]] on your weapon. You don't just go to a blacksmith and tell someone to upgrade your weapon, it doesn't work like that. You have to [[Genocide|beat up enemies with it]] and get points on the weapon, THEN you can upgrade it. It costs tons of gold and tons of points just to get one upgrade too, and if you don't do it you will insta-[[fail]].

Not only that, you have to worry about the repairing of these said weapons. If you want to try and keep your weapons in tip top shape, you have to shell out so much [[Jewgold|cash]] you'll probably end up [[Pussy|buying some gold]] from [[China|Chinese Gold Farmers]] to make ends meet. All blacksmiths except one have a repair rate of 96% or lower. The one with 98% charges [[Bullshit|unbelievable rates for just one point of repair]], the kind of rates that would make even [[Bill Gates]] think twice.

The monotony doesn't end there. Not only does it take a few years of dedicated game play and credit card swiping to get anywhere in this game, you also have to worry about a broken e-Conomy that overprices ugly clothes that were released on old events because the [[newfags]] think it's "retro". There are even dyes that have [[Seizure|flashing]] properties, when applied to clothes they flash between colors and give [[Epilepsy|epileptics]] one hell of a seizure and hurt the eyes of those healthy. People literally [[whore]] out for these in order to act [[Fail|cool]] among the other [[Mexico|trash]] that plays this game. It's all about getting the prettiest clothes made for [[you]]

[[tl;dr]], this game is boring.

===[[Fap|F2P]] vs. [[Internet money|P2P]]===
The game can be played from start to finish over the course of [[never|forever]], but only if you're willing to pay for it. While it's totally free to play, all the good stuff (such as good-looking hair, entire chains of quests, or items that let you [[spam]] the entire server with your [[stupidity|wisdom]]) cost Nexon Cash, which in turn costs [[money|real money]]. Needless to say, the game is primarily dominated by spoiled rich kids with mommy's credit card in their pockets. Because of its status as an old game [[shit nobody cares about|nobody cares about]], Nexon decided to milk the last few breaths of this game by adding reforges that gamble with stats, causing the die-hard wallet warriors spend hundreds upon thousands of dollars on what is essentially [[anime]] [[Runescape]]. This encourages impoverished weeaboo [[16-year-old girl]]s to mooch off of their basement-dwelling sugar daddies to buy all the hot items for them, and get [[pregnant]] with said basement dwellers so they can get their welfare money off of the [[Chris-Chan|autistic babies]] that are destined to come.

==Races==
[[File:Mabinogi1.jpg|thumb|right|Generic!]]
At present time, there are only three races to choose from,
One thing that sets the game apart from the endless number of other games just like it is the overbearing amount of customization you can give your character.
* '''[[Human]]''' - [[You]], [[me]], [[your mom]]. The game favors these adorable rascals over the other two for [[racism|various reasons]]. As such, humans get the best of everything and can finish the entire game. Can equip two swords at once, but can't equip two of anything else for some reason. They run the slowest in the game though. Humans being the first race to be released in Grindinogi have some of the uberl33test and players with the huegest of epeens. Good luck trying to overpower them with your puny penis.
* '''[[Queer|Elf]]''' - Humans with pointy ears. Really good at [[Pussy|hiding]] and shooting arrows. Generally frail and can't lift over 20 lbs. They can also fire two arrows and charge the fastest with Ranged Combat, making them perfect for trolling opposing players. Can also run very fast. All the humans and giants hope to god the elves wont get their sharp frail little fingers on a skill called Arrow Revolver which the Humans can use and is basically the only skill that allows them to troll better than the Elves. But everyone knows its going to happen eventually. Also can't choose to be black even though, evolutionary-wise, living in a fucking desert should make their people at least tan and not the pasty pale skin tones we're forced to choose from. This is not the same for Giants, who live in the icy tundra and should all technically be the white ones. Go figure.
* '''[[Furry|Giant]]''' - Huge people pumped up on steroids. Can [[rage]], equip two of anything humans can equip except swords, and has the largest arsenal of the three races including but not limited to [[banhammer|giant fucking sledgehammers]] and [[chat log|dead trees]]. Can't play dead or even throw rocks despite their immense strength. Can run faster than humans, but slower than Elves. They have a tendancy to rage when trolled too hard and will complain about everything imaginable, usually how their internet connection sucks, but its really just them that suck. Under 16 players tend to play as giants because they're cooler and taller than themselves and helps feed their epeen, the smarter folks go elf or human

==[[FYIAD|Transformations]]==
[[File:MabinogiFalconSage.jpg|thumb|right|Falcon Sage]]
[[File:MabinogiSavageBeast.jpg|thumb|right| ([[Bestiality|Beast Lord]])]]
Humans have the chance to become [[White Knight|Paladins]] or [[Emo|Dark Knights]], while [[Fag|Elves]] can become Falcon [[Sage|Sages]], and Giants can become Abominable Snow Men. Though your character looks like nothing more than a weak, feeble insect, when you transform they suddenly hit puberty and gain big stats for one in-game hour, which is only about five minutes [[IRL]]. You can only transform once every in-game day, and the duration of your transformation also increases by a few seconds each time you [[Unbirthing|Rebirth]] (Which costs [[Jewgold|money]], did I mention that?)

'''[[Retard|Paladin]]''': The epitome of faggotry in this game, only losers play as paladins because they claim it offers just '''TWO''' bonus points of Protection stat, making them better than everyone else. These internet white knights often get into [[Some Argue|arguments]] with players who are Dark Knights, resulting in massive [[Lulz|lulz]]-fests where ever they happen, each claiming they are better than the other when the simple fact in this game is that [[Micropenis|Arrow]] > [[Cock|Sword]]. Also Paladins have no inherent skill like the other transformations do, making them the most [[Fail|fail]].

'''[[Basement Dweller|Dark Knight]]''': The weakest transformation available to Human players. Upon Transformation for the first time you look like a teenage [[Lord of the Rings|Sauron]] and you have the coolest attack animations with certain weapons. Unfortunately when your duration is up and it comes time to devolve back into your weak human state, you don't do it automatically. Instead, you start losing health until you die unless you manually return form. Only [[Emo|emos]] play as this because they think it makes them [[leet|leet]] and is the only emotional crutch they have in this crappy game. They also have an ability that lets them [[Buttsex|take control]] of other monsters with their [[Psychic|mind]], allowing them to bring them into town and set them loose upon the [[Owned|noobs]]. The final transformation looks [[Gay|gay]] too.

'''[[Homo|Falcon Elf]]''': Arguably the coolest looking transformation if you are playing a [[Woman|female]] and have the final transformation, but they only say that because it has [[Idiot|AWESUM WINGZ N SHIT]]. Has the ability to cast [[Dungeons and Dragons|Magic Missile]] and [[Nuke|nuke]] their enemies with [[KILL IT WITH FIRE|fireballs]], thunder storms, and blizzards. Charges ranged attack EVEN FASTER allowing for maximum ownage.[[Fail|But it can't even fly even if it does have wings]].

'''[[Furry|Savage Beast]]''': The biggest thing in the game aside from the dragons. Has the most strength, but still cannot throw giant boulders at their enemies despite being able to knock down '''[[Stupid|10 FT TREES AND USE THEM AS WEAPONS]]''' Has the ability to charge up a wide swing attack and decimate enemies that are close to them, but it sucks and nobody cares about it. Perfect race for furries.

==Classes==
The game itself is very [[goatse|open-ended]] in that there's no pre-set classes. A player is free to choose whatever they want to be and use any equipment their race can equip. However, there are some amount of "builds" floating around out there for people who think they're [[doing it wrong]].

* '''Master of Combat''' - Put all your Ability Points into "Combat Mastery" and become ub3rl33t! Nah, just kidding. Melee sucks balls in this game! Your best bet is to equip two of anything or a two-handed weapon and just knock the shit out anything that comes your way. "Windmill" and "Final Hit" probably wouldn't hurt, either.
* '''Arrow Revolver''' - Great for [[trolling]] [[leet]] PvPers. Pour all your Ability Points into "Arrow Revolver" and watch your opponents [[ragequit]] as you destroy them with endless arrow spam.
* '''Ice Wizard''' - The magic version of Gatling Shot build. Also great for [[trolling]]. Pour all your Ability Points into "Icebolt" and watch your opponents ragequit as you spam it.
* '''Fire Wizard''' - Most powerful build in the game. Pour all your Ability Points into "Fireball" and do a million points of damage to everyone around you in one hit.
* '''Master Alchemist''' - Summon a golem and spam "Flame Burst" and "HP Drain" while it distracts your opponent. Also, throw up some spiked barriers so no one can touch you.
* '''Bard''' - Master "Music Playing", "Composition", and "Musical Knowledge" and gain the ability to buff and heal your allies by playing [[Caramelldansen]] over and over again! [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CpfHFFWxvcs No, seriously].

==The Game Itself==
[[File:NaoSex1.jpg|thumb|right|Congratulations! You know how to use your dick now, if you can find it.]]
[[File:NaoSex2.jpg|thumb|right|She has the nicest body.]]
[[File:NaoSex3.gif|thumb|right|She's the best at what she does!]]
[[File:NaoSex4.jpg|thumb|right|The best Christmas gift ever.]]
When you first install this trainwreck, you're greeted with only one character card. It's premium, but noobs don't know that it's premium because the stars indicating premium-only confuse them into believing they don't deserve them yet. After entering the screen, you can start at [[Toddlercon|Age 10]] to [[Jailbait|Age 17]] and be either a [[Bitch|female]] or a [[Autism|male human]]. [[Pedophile|Smart people]] will start at Age 10 because you gain 5 AP(Ability Points) every time your character's birthday comes around. However, the AP spam doesn't last long because once you're Age 16, you only gain 2 AP per rebirth, and it becomes a painful wait until you become Age 20 for that free rebirthing card. Noobs are not advised in the slightest to rebirth at age 10, but with the new Noobie Updates, anyone under total level 100 can rebirth every day, so you good. Your character's birthday is one week after the first time you make them. Please note that since the map is huge and the distance between towns is unbelievably large, you'll be pretty tempted to buy a pet, the cheapest one being $10. "Oh, not that much," you say? How about it being the slowest fucking creature known to man as you see other players race right past you with their flaming horses.

You will first be in the soul stream, which plays both a big factor in this game's story, and also does not. One of the most [[Awesome|amazing]] things in gaming history will be there to greet you after a few seconds. A girl with very big [[boobs]], long hair, deep blue eyes, and a black one-piece [[China|Chinese dress]]. It should be noted [[Slut|she isn't wearing any underwear either]]. Her name is [[Nao]]. [[Srsly]]. When she floats down and lands, her breats [[Hot|jiggle]] as [[Cum|icing]] on the [[Delicious Cake|cake]].

She gives you a book that tells you how to play the game, and she gives you some bread, showing that she can indeed cook and has a [[In the kitchen|kitchen]], but this is the only time that she ever makes you a sandwich. If you're a [[Horny|nice person]], you can actually buy her clothes(From the Cash shop mind you) and find them in [[Bondage|dungeons]], and the next time you rebirth you can give them to her and she'll wear them. The only problem is, you'll only see these skimpy outfits on her if you have her come to revive you if you die somewhere, which costs IRL money to have that kind of [[Sex|service]]. [[Bitch|She won't wear these anywhere else.]] You can also never talk to her when you want, and if a quest actually requires you to see her (And some do), you have to wait until you can rebirth.

Before one of the biggest patches, to rebirth you had to wait '''THREE WEEKS'''(Three character birthdays), which is also roughly a month, and purchase another character card. After you met these requirements, you could do it. You cannot be successful in this game unless you rebirth, it is impossible. You can only ever go so far when it comes to leveling, and eventually, your characters [[Oldfag|aging]] will stop giving you AP, and you can never train your skills until you do this. After this big patch, if you bought a premium card [[Scam|(Which costs about $10 USD)]] you can rebirth in just one week. You can rebirth for free if you wait three weeks, but you can't change anything about your character. This game is perfectly designed to be a gigantic money sink if you want to stay competitive against ever increasing difficulty. The best you can do without [[Insane|clawing your fucking eyes out]] is to reach level 50 every rebirth, after that it's plain stupid to try and level anymore.

[[LOL|GUESS WHAT LOL YOU CAN'T EVEN BEAT G1'S MAIN STORY UNLESS YOU ARE LIKE LEVEL 400 AND HAVE SOME HIGHLY RANKED SKILLS BEHIND YOU]]. That, or you can [[Fellatio|suck some dick]] and join some [[Nerds|guilds]] to get the lazy fags who've been [[No life|playing a lot longer than you]] to help you beat it so you can transform and be cool too.

It costs about [[WTF|$25 USD]] to buy all the premium service this game has available. Extra storage, creating a guild (while having no real gain from it) and getting a [[Dildo|free item]] from [[Prostitute|Nao]] every [[Dying alone|birthday]] your character celebrates.

You don't have to just spend your money on this, however!! Nexon NA, being the expert Korean & Mexican scammers they are have implemented another feature to the in-game cash shop. You can buy in game items too! Though you can tell this is complete [[bullshit]] because the other versions don't have [[E-peen|2x EXP potions]] in their shops, and you can't get every single item in the game from their cash shops either!

So now that you know this game is simply intended to rip as much money from the American populace as possible, you should also know that even after two whole years of being in service, this game still lacks proper maintenance. Oh sure, Nexon can slap up about [[Seriously|16 hours of failed maintenance]] once in a while, but it doesn't do jack shit. Glitches and bugs still haunt this game from it's open beta. Not only that, with each introduction of new content, they manage to fuck everything else up all the time. Bad translations, horrible spelling and grammar, and broken quest chains. If you try to tell the fans of this game any of this, they'll just cover their ears and make noises to blot out the [[truth]]. Oh, and unlike other versions, every time you [[Sex|initiate a conversation]] with an NPC, [[Stupidity|the game locks up for two seconds before you actually get the chat window with them]].

You have to admit though, devCat had a good trick up their sleeve with this [[Tits|busty girl]] Nao. They knew all of the potential fans for this game were [[Fail|lonely]], [[virgin]], unrepentant [[Weeaboo|weeaboos]] who think [[Japan]] is the greatest thing ever. [[Idiots|Too bad they usually forget this game came from KOREA]]. There isn't porn of just her, but people often draw their [[Bestiality|characters having sex with the in game monsters]], or the [[Lonely|Ego Weapon spirits]].

===Meet the Community===

Everyone and anyone that bothers to play this game is likely an autistic fucktard or a halfwitted retard fucktard. That means if you do play this game, you may be either or both. Asking a rich 12 year old jew, if you can try his super expensive clothes on. He will likely accept so you can just run off with his shiny shit and watch him fruitlessly attempt to get his stuff back via spamming nexon, all the while knowing they wont do shit for him. If someone says they have a girlfriend it is a trap, and should be reminded of their current situation. FurthermoreAll the girls are actually guys, if they prove their femeninity by showing a picture, it is ripped off from facebook.

Speaking of facebook, there are actually facebook groups for each of mabinogi's servers. Each of these groups are populated by the largest waste of human flesh and bones born in the last 20 years. Just like the aforementioned cesspool that is this game, masterbation and fudge packing are frequent hobbies and discussions on how best to shove penis into mouth are frequently asked questions.
As expected of any shitty Asian game that actually made it to the [[USA|American]] continent; Circlejerking, [[attention whore|attention whoring]], japanology and weaboo-ism are known diseases that rapidly infect new players.

Visit at your own risk.

{{nobodies}}

==Videos==
<center>{{Frame|{{fv|mabinogivids|background-color: #E4CEB4;|font-weight: bold;|
<youtube>d96NIklLZGk</youtube>
<center>'''That is just god damn amazing. Just kidding.'''</center>|
<youtube>OzCdSBOmqQ4</youtube>
<center>'''Trolling made easy.'''</center>}}|border=#E4CEB4|background=#E4CEB4}}</center>

==Mabinogi Mobile==
[[2025]] mobile game.

==See Also==
*[[Magibon]]

==External Links==
*[http://mabinogi.nexon.net/ Official Site]
*[http://www.mabichan.org/ Mabi-Chan]

{{MMORPGs}}
{{Korea}}
{{Gaming}}

[[Category:Gaming]]

Mabinogi

2026-05-15T13:42:48Z

Gooksu: /* See Also */

Korea

2026-05-15T10:48:22Z

Gooksu: /* Fun Facts */

{{offended}}
{{notice|S/Korea just Declared Martial Law !1!!}}
==Background==
[[Image:Koreanzerglings.jpg|thumb|left|ZERG RUSH!]]
[[File:Ahotkoreanman.jpg|thumb|left|A typical korean man]]
Once upon a time, Japan [[Surprise Sex|surprise buttsexed]] China, and '''''KOREA''''' is the prolapsed colon that resulted. During [[100 years ago|the 1950s]] Korea was the site of some epic [[RL drama]], when [[Lulz|war]] broke out between the North and South due to a lack of good ''[[Starcraft]]'' and ''[[League of Legends]]'' servers. After repeated [[Rape|defeats]], the South asked the [[America]]ns for help, in response the Americans and pretty much the rest of the world proceeded to [[Pwn|invade and drive back]] the North all the way to the Chinese border. However, more drama was to be begotten when paranoid [[chink]] commies, most armed with little more than their microscopic ding dongs, went apeshit and launched a surprise [[Raid|offensive]] on the UN armies, who, after some serious anal raping, then agreed to a [[GG|ceasefire]]. The [[Korean War]] initiated the proud American tradition of [[Freedom|bombing the shit out of other countries in order to save them]], and introduced the world to the noble Chinese tradition of rounding up a bunch of illiterate [[Mexicans|peasant]]s, giving them a couple of twigs, and forcing them into heroic, [[an hero|suicidal]] "[[Zerg rush|human wave]]" attacks. The border of North and South Korea hasn't changed since, with both sides engaging in a [[flame war|stand-off]].

There are a few Koreans in Japan, and the Japanese there, practicing exceedingly high standards concerning racial purity, treat them as [[niggers]].Also, the chasm between Western and Eastern part of Korea is high, as they try not to taint their royal [[Azn]] blood with niggers, white devils, or other Azns in Korea.

==Foods/Customs==

Korean dishes include boiled grasses, leaves, boiled dogs, boiled cows; anything that is boiled and cooked with red-pepper can be Korean. While some love Korean food, typical Korean dish, which consists of Kimchi, Radish-Kimchi, White-Kimchi, more Kimchi, and rice, is not edible to humans, except for maybe hungry people that live in Africa. The legend actually has it that koreans drip kimchi when they bleed.

Koreans have very odd custom of calling anyone older "hyung/oppa/nuna", which means older brother or older sister. As a result, in many case of Korean relationships, people say "my sister/brother" when they are having sex, which kind of explains why Japs(that came from Koreans) are obsessed with incest hentai. But Koreans don't have to do that since Korean couples engage in daily incest role play. Due to possible broken DNA resulting from incestuous relationships, we can still confirm that Koreans are very proud of their Korean heritage(which probably consists of copying other heritages.)

Most of the students in Korea are virgins, preparing to become great honorary [[Azn]] wizard. Their sports of choice include memorizing useless crap, watching K-pop when they are not sleeping, watching Japanese porn and hating Japs at possibly at the same time, and masturbating with their well plagiarized achievements. Although Koreans naturally suck at sports, they are better than any other ethnicity at talking about sports.

Recently Korean government banned pornography because Korean women could not stand the sight of women online that had bigger boobs and asses than them,(which is practically everyone in the world); however, Korean virgin males did not react because they were shamed of having [[Azn]] dicks.

Korean men like to brag about mandatory military service, which can best be likened to Auschwitz, except that it is worse because you would have to see Korean fags talk all day about K-pop and eat kimchi all day. Historians claim that faggotry practiced among Koreans stem from long history of slavery.(No, this is actually serious, slaves made up 50% of the population in the last Chosun dynasty of Korea). Naturally, Koreans are [[nigger]] asians; however, particular faggotry is practiced only among Korean themselves because people from other race actually stand up for themselves and beat the shit out of anyone who does it.

In their long shitty history, (imagine the never-ending series of [[sharknado]] movies), there have been no Korean historical figures that influenced the world in a positive manner; however, King Sejong and Lee-Soon-Shin are famous to test-makers in the US for making frequent appearances in the essay section of the SAT. Believe it or not, some conspiracy theories claim that [[Hitler]] had a Korean ancestry.

== Simplified ==
[[File:Koreanbaby.jpg|thumb|right|A typical Korean child can go through a litter during a picnic]]
[[File:Bestkorea.jpg|thumb|right|[[Pokemon|NORTH KOREA IS BEST KOREA!]]]]
[[Best Korea|North Korea]]: The pimps with the nukes. 
[[Good Korea|South Korea]]: The players with the shitty tech.
[[File:KoreanBDSMWhore.jpg|thumb|right|Americans brutally tortured Korean Civilians during the Korea War in both Koreas]]

According to [[Conservative|Samuel Huntington]] the whole idea is for Good Korea to inherit Evil Korea's Nukes after they all starve, thus joining the Nuclear Club, guilt-free.

== How to Troll a Korean ==
[[Image:chop.jpg|thumb|An actual Korean reaction to Takeshima related issues.]]
[[Image:Korean.jpg|thumb|The only sport Koreans give a shit about is [[Starcraft]].]]
# Say ''anything'' good about Japan at all. [[Seriously]], try it; it works. For more lulz, "mistake" them for Japanese: enjoy the effects.
# Go around saying that Koreans originate from Southeast Asia, like this [http://www.youtube.com/user/SouthEastAsianUnion/ gook], and all the studies done in major universities are all [[lulz|lulz]].
# Buy a Korean girl a fake designer purse (make sure it is a good fake, they have a sense that allows them to be able to sniff out all but the best fakes), have sex with her (should be no problem once she thinks you bought her something expensive with some French or Italian guy's name on it), then reveal to her that the purse is a fake that you bought off some Nigerian guy at a flea market for $10 and watch as her head implodes with rage.
# Say "Dokdo (Takeshima for more lulz) belongs to Japan!" This is guaranteed to send any Korean into an epic rage. An EPIC, EPIC RAGE.
# Explain to them how wonderful the Kim dynasty is, then ask their opinion on the family.
# Tell them that most Korean words come from China.
# Ask them how many times Korea has been invaded.
# Call them "gook," "chink," "Chinese," or "panface." (Obviously this is not trolling. Koreans will become [[Cho Seung Hui]])
# Tell a Korean girl she'd look so much better with an eye job.
# Tell them about your trip to Asia, and make sure to say that the Korean whores were the best.
# Tell a Korean man that your girlfriend is Korean.
# Ask if dog tastes good.
# Inform a Korean man that usually, when a Korean girl goes to college she can't get enough nigger dick.
# Tell a Korean man that his wife wasn't a virgin, she had hymen replacement surgery. Say that she was your girlfriend, during which time you fucked her as much as possible, and he's lucky to have such a sweet piece of ass.
# Tell them that Japanese is an infinitely more beautiful language than Korean.
# Tell them how Korea has [[truth|spent its entire history being the bitch of either China, Japan, or the USA]].
# Talk to them in Japanese and expect them to understand you completely.

Be careful; they often carry knives.

== Fun Facts ==
[[Image:Ugly south korean.png|thumb|right|300px|North Korean propaganda, but has immense troll value nonetheless.]]
* All Koreans have hardons for ''[[Starcraft]]'' and ''[[League of Legends]]''.
* Korean believe they are the best Asians, just like the Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese, Taiwanese- Oh FUCK it, [[Fact|all Asians are retarded]]. Except for the [[Philippines|Filipinos]], who make themselves everyone's bitch.
* All Koreans are extremely susceptible to unquestioning belief in urban myths and old wives tales; in modern times those backed by email chain letters or Korean news rather than any actual scientific evidence are particularly dangerous when released upon unsuspecting Koreans. A favorite is that eating dog will transform your vocal chords into those of an opera singer. Also, see [[fan death]].
* Koreans are actually aliens from the planet of Korethra. Your base ours is now.
*[[Incest|99% of Koreans bear the surname "Kim," "Lee," or "Park."]]
*one good example of someone with the surname kim is the hot kim tae hee , someone with lee is the hot lee ha nui or someone with pak is pak chae rim
* King Dong Dil, leader of North Korea, is actually a [[robot]].
* [[Korean cry|Korean tears]] are chemically unrelated to tears from any other ethnic group on the planet.
* Everything that goes wrong in Korea is the Japan's fault. If you insult or complain about Korea, you must be Japanese. No exceptions. Just ask the gooks.

== Typical Response to an American ==
# Yankee Go Home!
# [[I'M X|I'M KOREAN]]! SON OF A BITCH AMERICAN! AMERICAN IS PIG! DO YOU WANT CHEESEBURGER? DO YOU WANT PIZZA? AMERICAN IS PIG DISGUSTING! BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA IS MURDERER! FUCKING U.S.A!!!!1
# Your beef tastes like dog turds in glue.
# You mean nothing to us...except for Blizzard.
# KKKKIIILLLL NNNNOOOORRRRTTTTHHH KOOORREEEAAAAA

But After the 2010s, South Korean sentiment toward the United States has come to favor the United States, with the exception of a few anti-Americans.

<center>[[Image:Boiled alive dogs asians.jpg|thumb|center|600px|Fun fact: koreans love dog meat, hell, [[DO IT FAGGOT|you can even taste one in a korean restaurant!]]]]</center>

== Brutally True Facts About Koreans ==
[[File:Average Penis Size Throughout the World.jpg|thumb|Korean men have the smallest dicks in the world]]
# They [[Fact|smell.]]
# North Koreans are mind-fucked and think their country is full of purity thanks to their grorious reader.
# Lower-class Koreans are extremely hot-headed, any words that sounds like an insult towards them and they will punch you in the face with no remorse.
# Koreans are either people that are mentioned above, or SAT nerds with giant glasses and loads of SAT-prep books stacking in their room just so they can try and get into Harvard, but usually end up going to some school for rich Korean failures like Bucknell.
# Koreans eat dogs. They really do, and they really don't like to talk about it.
# The Koreans are the only race on the planet that are both more xenophobic and materialistic than the [[Jews]].
# Koreans think they are tough shit and are better than Americans, but the sad truth is if it wasn't for [[America]] saving their sorry asses back in Korean War, the entire peninsula will be buttraped by the [[Best Korea|grorious reader]]. America is still saving their asses by patrolling the DMZ. If it weren't for the U.S., South Korea would belong to Kim Jong-Il.
# Koreans think [[Fact|their history consists of 5,000 years, but 95% of it are lies]].
# They come to America and/or the Philippines for education, because [[Fact|Korean universities are hellholes of suicide epidemics.]]
# Koreans look down on any non-Koreans just because they are Koreans.
# Every individual Korean must stay within 30 feet of another Korean, for if one doesn't stay close enough to another for a day, he will slowly rot to the ground.
# The term "Gold Digger" is actually derived from the first Empress of Korea named Queen Geul Dik-geon, who would only ovulate after her lover, the first Emperor of Korea, spent well over the equivalent of modern $100 million USD on designer hand bags, shoes, and plastic surgery for her. The pair went on to father the Korean people, with this trait still being seen today in all Korean women.
# Koreans actually believe Japanese Samurai originated from Korean [[Bullshit|Samurang]].
# On the rare occasion a Korean immigrant converses with someone of a different ethnicity, they'll go on and on about how great their home country is, despite having jumped at the chance to move to the nation they currently live in.
# [[Kpop]] is used to hide their country's truth, just to only get their attention and its good images. They get so butthurt whenever someone (doesn't need to be anti-sentimental or so) exposes them into complete misery.
# Their education is consistent of Hangul, and about the fucking island of Dokdo (Oh scratch that, Dokdo isn't even their land! LOL, it was Takeshima!)
# Many Koreans, especially the ones in America, are hard-core evangelical Christians, and will openly discuss religion anywhere, anytime. Do not be surprised if a Korean sitting next to you on the bus asks you if you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. If you say, "no," he will proceed to give you a sermon, telling you that you will certainly go to hell. If you try to get away from him, he will follow you.
# You should be glad you're not a [[Good Korea|South Korean]] citizen, because all male citizens are required to serve 2 years in the military, which is basically worthless since they're gonna suck America's cock for help again once there is a war. Most of their time is spent sucking their CO's cocks to not get beaten up and <s>pulling out weeds with their bare hands while they're paid $100 a month to do so</s> [[Shit nobody cares about|As of 2026, a soldier's monthly salary is 1000 dollars]], which just shows that they're only meat shields to buy time for good old 'Murican freedom where the women are exempt from this meaningless conscription.
# Be cautious of any Koreans near you, [[Cho Seung-Hui|for one of them might want to go for a high score and blow up a college near you]].
# Any game from [[Starcraft|Blizzard]], [[League Of Legends|Riot]], or Nexon is just like oxygen for the Koreans, for if they stop playing it, they will die; [[World of Warcraft|they're much more important than their babies]].
# Koreans think their culture is unique, but it's basically a rip-off mix between [[Japan]] and [[China]].
# [[Fact|Koreans are much uglier and their eyes are much slantier]] than their [[Azn|Asian]] neighbors, that's why plastic surgery is so popular in Korea. Their faces are also flat, which is why they are called "panfaces."
# Every student who graduates each term, will receive a plastic surgery, because their panfaces deshape at least each year.
# No one gives a shit about Koreans (except for Koreans themselves of course, and the few, pathetic [[koreaboo|Koreaboos]]).
# Unlike other Asians who move to the US and become [[Yuppies]] (China) and [[Hipsters]] (Japan), Koreans tend to turn into gun-toting [[rednecks]].
# In [[Good Korea|South Korea]], people only purchase products from Korean brands (e.g. Samsung, Hyundai etc.). Purchasing anything from foreign brands will result in buttrape because people will think you're not supporting Korea.
# All Koreans are stalkers.
# If you think any of the above is false and are attempting to delete them, then you must be or at least partially Korean, because frankly non-Koreans never liked Koreans and always assumed they are the rudest and most pathetic group of people ever lived on Earth; and only Koreans think of themselves as pure and sinless.
# Koreans often are confused whether people are complimenting or insulting them. As a result, they resort to faggotry and act like dumbasses.
# Because their parents make them study constantly during childhood and adolescence, Koreans have no social skills and are extremely awkward around anyone who isn't Korean.
# There is always a Korean table in the dining hall of any major university. They do not mix with outsiders.
# They're rude, emotionally retarded, and reek of kim chee, garlic, and anchovies. Since they have panfaces, the average Korean male's face is frozen in an expression of unwarranted disdain.
# Korean women will stab to death their entire families for just a mere whiff of some white cock.
# They have nothing of their own. No tradition, but just copying others for the lulz and claiming it as a Korean invention.
# Had to invent the [[mukbang]] because half the population are friendless [[loser]]s.

==Korean Videos==
Most of them are shit nobody cares about, like Kim Jong-Il's penis size or [[Gay|faburous Korean history]], and the rikes. Enjoy these videos brought to you by the '''Korean Intelligence Agency'''.
{|style="margin:0 auto"
|{{frame|{{videoframe|koreavideos|background-color:#a5a5a5|font-weight:bold
|<youtube>P8XjcK06UXo</youtube> <center>'''The Korean National Anthem.'''</center>
|<youtube>Ptyzc4BQliY</youtube> <center></center>
|<youtube>xXxvsShaAoA</youtube> <center></center>
|<youtube>9bZkp7q19f0</youtube> <center>'''This is what Gay Korea is best known for.'''</center>}}|border=#a5a5a5|background=#a5a5a5}}
|}

==Famous Gooks==
* [[Cho Seung Hui]]
* [[Kim il sung]]
* [[Kim Jong Il]]
* [[Chan Ho Park|Park Chan Ho]]
* [[The Hipster Grifter]]
*The Gangnam Style Guy with the shitty dance moves

== See Also ==
*[[Japan]]
*[[Good Korea]]
*[[Best Korea]]
*[[China]]
*[[Asian]]
*[[Communism]]
*[[Homefront]]

== External Links ==

* [http://blog.empas.com/wwjang/list.html?c=1929499&v=content Korean crap]

{{race}}

{{Korea}}

{{4chanarchive|24618024|I'M KOREAN}}

{{commonwealth}}

[[Category: Locations]]

Korea

2026-05-15T10:47:44Z

Gooksu: /* Typical Response to an American */

{{offended}}
{{notice|S/Korea just Declared Martial Law !1!!}}
==Background==
[[Image:Koreanzerglings.jpg|thumb|left|ZERG RUSH!]]
[[File:Ahotkoreanman.jpg|thumb|left|A typical korean man]]
Once upon a time, Japan [[Surprise Sex|surprise buttsexed]] China, and '''''KOREA''''' is the prolapsed colon that resulted. During [[100 years ago|the 1950s]] Korea was the site of some epic [[RL drama]], when [[Lulz|war]] broke out between the North and South due to a lack of good ''[[Starcraft]]'' and ''[[League of Legends]]'' servers. After repeated [[Rape|defeats]], the South asked the [[America]]ns for help, in response the Americans and pretty much the rest of the world proceeded to [[Pwn|invade and drive back]] the North all the way to the Chinese border. However, more drama was to be begotten when paranoid [[chink]] commies, most armed with little more than their microscopic ding dongs, went apeshit and launched a surprise [[Raid|offensive]] on the UN armies, who, after some serious anal raping, then agreed to a [[GG|ceasefire]]. The [[Korean War]] initiated the proud American tradition of [[Freedom|bombing the shit out of other countries in order to save them]], and introduced the world to the noble Chinese tradition of rounding up a bunch of illiterate [[Mexicans|peasant]]s, giving them a couple of twigs, and forcing them into heroic, [[an hero|suicidal]] "[[Zerg rush|human wave]]" attacks. The border of North and South Korea hasn't changed since, with both sides engaging in a [[flame war|stand-off]].

There are a few Koreans in Japan, and the Japanese there, practicing exceedingly high standards concerning racial purity, treat them as [[niggers]].Also, the chasm between Western and Eastern part of Korea is high, as they try not to taint their royal [[Azn]] blood with niggers, white devils, or other Azns in Korea.

==Foods/Customs==

Korean dishes include boiled grasses, leaves, boiled dogs, boiled cows; anything that is boiled and cooked with red-pepper can be Korean. While some love Korean food, typical Korean dish, which consists of Kimchi, Radish-Kimchi, White-Kimchi, more Kimchi, and rice, is not edible to humans, except for maybe hungry people that live in Africa. The legend actually has it that koreans drip kimchi when they bleed.

Koreans have very odd custom of calling anyone older "hyung/oppa/nuna", which means older brother or older sister. As a result, in many case of Korean relationships, people say "my sister/brother" when they are having sex, which kind of explains why Japs(that came from Koreans) are obsessed with incest hentai. But Koreans don't have to do that since Korean couples engage in daily incest role play. Due to possible broken DNA resulting from incestuous relationships, we can still confirm that Koreans are very proud of their Korean heritage(which probably consists of copying other heritages.)

Most of the students in Korea are virgins, preparing to become great honorary [[Azn]] wizard. Their sports of choice include memorizing useless crap, watching K-pop when they are not sleeping, watching Japanese porn and hating Japs at possibly at the same time, and masturbating with their well plagiarized achievements. Although Koreans naturally suck at sports, they are better than any other ethnicity at talking about sports.

Recently Korean government banned pornography because Korean women could not stand the sight of women online that had bigger boobs and asses than them,(which is practically everyone in the world); however, Korean virgin males did not react because they were shamed of having [[Azn]] dicks.

Korean men like to brag about mandatory military service, which can best be likened to Auschwitz, except that it is worse because you would have to see Korean fags talk all day about K-pop and eat kimchi all day. Historians claim that faggotry practiced among Koreans stem from long history of slavery.(No, this is actually serious, slaves made up 50% of the population in the last Chosun dynasty of Korea). Naturally, Koreans are [[nigger]] asians; however, particular faggotry is practiced only among Korean themselves because people from other race actually stand up for themselves and beat the shit out of anyone who does it.

In their long shitty history, (imagine the never-ending series of [[sharknado]] movies), there have been no Korean historical figures that influenced the world in a positive manner; however, King Sejong and Lee-Soon-Shin are famous to test-makers in the US for making frequent appearances in the essay section of the SAT. Believe it or not, some conspiracy theories claim that [[Hitler]] had a Korean ancestry.

== Simplified ==
[[File:Koreanbaby.jpg|thumb|right|A typical Korean child can go through a litter during a picnic]]
[[File:Bestkorea.jpg|thumb|right|[[Pokemon|NORTH KOREA IS BEST KOREA!]]]]
[[Best Korea|North Korea]]: The pimps with the nukes. 
[[Good Korea|South Korea]]: The players with the shitty tech.
[[File:KoreanBDSMWhore.jpg|thumb|right|Americans brutally tortured Korean Civilians during the Korea War in both Koreas]]

According to [[Conservative|Samuel Huntington]] the whole idea is for Good Korea to inherit Evil Korea's Nukes after they all starve, thus joining the Nuclear Club, guilt-free.

== How to Troll a Korean ==
[[Image:chop.jpg|thumb|An actual Korean reaction to Takeshima related issues.]]
[[Image:Korean.jpg|thumb|The only sport Koreans give a shit about is [[Starcraft]].]]
# Say ''anything'' good about Japan at all. [[Seriously]], try it; it works. For more lulz, "mistake" them for Japanese: enjoy the effects.
# Go around saying that Koreans originate from Southeast Asia, like this [http://www.youtube.com/user/SouthEastAsianUnion/ gook], and all the studies done in major universities are all [[lulz|lulz]].
# Buy a Korean girl a fake designer purse (make sure it is a good fake, they have a sense that allows them to be able to sniff out all but the best fakes), have sex with her (should be no problem once she thinks you bought her something expensive with some French or Italian guy's name on it), then reveal to her that the purse is a fake that you bought off some Nigerian guy at a flea market for $10 and watch as her head implodes with rage.
# Say "Dokdo (Takeshima for more lulz) belongs to Japan!" This is guaranteed to send any Korean into an epic rage. An EPIC, EPIC RAGE.
# Explain to them how wonderful the Kim dynasty is, then ask their opinion on the family.
# Tell them that most Korean words come from China.
# Ask them how many times Korea has been invaded.
# Call them "gook," "chink," "Chinese," or "panface." (Obviously this is not trolling. Koreans will become [[Cho Seung Hui]])
# Tell a Korean girl she'd look so much better with an eye job.
# Tell them about your trip to Asia, and make sure to say that the Korean whores were the best.
# Tell a Korean man that your girlfriend is Korean.
# Ask if dog tastes good.
# Inform a Korean man that usually, when a Korean girl goes to college she can't get enough nigger dick.
# Tell a Korean man that his wife wasn't a virgin, she had hymen replacement surgery. Say that she was your girlfriend, during which time you fucked her as much as possible, and he's lucky to have such a sweet piece of ass.
# Tell them that Japanese is an infinitely more beautiful language than Korean.
# Tell them how Korea has [[truth|spent its entire history being the bitch of either China, Japan, or the USA]].
# Talk to them in Japanese and expect them to understand you completely.

Be careful; they often carry knives.

== Fun Facts ==
[[Image:Ugly south korean.png|thumb|right|300px|North Korean propaganda, but has immense troll value nonetheless.]]
* All Koreans have hardons for ''[[Starcraft]]''.
* Korean believe they are the best Asians, just like the Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese, Taiwanese- Oh FUCK it, [[Fact|all Asians are retarded]]. Except for the [[Philippines|Filipinos]], who make themselves everyone's bitch.
* All Koreans are extremely susceptible to unquestioning belief in urban myths and old wives tales; in modern times those backed by email chain letters or Korean news rather than any actual scientific evidence are particularly dangerous when released upon unsuspecting Koreans. A favorite is that eating dog will transform your vocal chords into those of an opera singer. Also, see [[fan death]].
* Koreans are actually aliens from the planet of Korethra. Your base ours is now.
*[[Incest|99% of Koreans bear the surname "Kim," "Lee," or "Park."]]
*one good example of someone with the surname kim is the hot kim tae hee , someone with lee is the hot lee ha nui or someone with pak is pak chae rim
* King Dong Dil, leader of North Korea, is actually a [[robot]].
* [[Korean cry|Korean tears]] are chemically unrelated to tears from any other ethnic group on the planet.
* Everything that goes wrong in Korea is the Japan's fault. If you insult or complain about Korea, you must be Japanese. No exceptions. Just ask the gooks.

== Typical Response to an American ==
# Yankee Go Home!
# [[I'M X|I'M KOREAN]]! SON OF A BITCH AMERICAN! AMERICAN IS PIG! DO YOU WANT CHEESEBURGER? DO YOU WANT PIZZA? AMERICAN IS PIG DISGUSTING! BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA IS MURDERER! FUCKING U.S.A!!!!1
# Your beef tastes like dog turds in glue.
# You mean nothing to us...except for Blizzard.
# KKKKIIILLLL NNNNOOOORRRRTTTTHHH KOOORREEEAAAAA

But After the 2010s, South Korean sentiment toward the United States has come to favor the United States, with the exception of a few anti-Americans.

<center>[[Image:Boiled alive dogs asians.jpg|thumb|center|600px|Fun fact: koreans love dog meat, hell, [[DO IT FAGGOT|you can even taste one in a korean restaurant!]]]]</center>

== Brutally True Facts About Koreans ==
[[File:Average Penis Size Throughout the World.jpg|thumb|Korean men have the smallest dicks in the world]]
# They [[Fact|smell.]]
# North Koreans are mind-fucked and think their country is full of purity thanks to their grorious reader.
# Lower-class Koreans are extremely hot-headed, any words that sounds like an insult towards them and they will punch you in the face with no remorse.
# Koreans are either people that are mentioned above, or SAT nerds with giant glasses and loads of SAT-prep books stacking in their room just so they can try and get into Harvard, but usually end up going to some school for rich Korean failures like Bucknell.
# Koreans eat dogs. They really do, and they really don't like to talk about it.
# The Koreans are the only race on the planet that are both more xenophobic and materialistic than the [[Jews]].
# Koreans think they are tough shit and are better than Americans, but the sad truth is if it wasn't for [[America]] saving their sorry asses back in Korean War, the entire peninsula will be buttraped by the [[Best Korea|grorious reader]]. America is still saving their asses by patrolling the DMZ. If it weren't for the U.S., South Korea would belong to Kim Jong-Il.
# Koreans think [[Fact|their history consists of 5,000 years, but 95% of it are lies]].
# They come to America and/or the Philippines for education, because [[Fact|Korean universities are hellholes of suicide epidemics.]]
# Koreans look down on any non-Koreans just because they are Koreans.
# Every individual Korean must stay within 30 feet of another Korean, for if one doesn't stay close enough to another for a day, he will slowly rot to the ground.
# The term "Gold Digger" is actually derived from the first Empress of Korea named Queen Geul Dik-geon, who would only ovulate after her lover, the first Emperor of Korea, spent well over the equivalent of modern $100 million USD on designer hand bags, shoes, and plastic surgery for her. The pair went on to father the Korean people, with this trait still being seen today in all Korean women.
# Koreans actually believe Japanese Samurai originated from Korean [[Bullshit|Samurang]].
# On the rare occasion a Korean immigrant converses with someone of a different ethnicity, they'll go on and on about how great their home country is, despite having jumped at the chance to move to the nation they currently live in.
# [[Kpop]] is used to hide their country's truth, just to only get their attention and its good images. They get so butthurt whenever someone (doesn't need to be anti-sentimental or so) exposes them into complete misery.
# Their education is consistent of Hangul, and about the fucking island of Dokdo (Oh scratch that, Dokdo isn't even their land! LOL, it was Takeshima!)
# Many Koreans, especially the ones in America, are hard-core evangelical Christians, and will openly discuss religion anywhere, anytime. Do not be surprised if a Korean sitting next to you on the bus asks you if you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. If you say, "no," he will proceed to give you a sermon, telling you that you will certainly go to hell. If you try to get away from him, he will follow you.
# You should be glad you're not a [[Good Korea|South Korean]] citizen, because all male citizens are required to serve 2 years in the military, which is basically worthless since they're gonna suck America's cock for help again once there is a war. Most of their time is spent sucking their CO's cocks to not get beaten up and <s>pulling out weeds with their bare hands while they're paid $100 a month to do so</s> [[Shit nobody cares about|As of 2026, a soldier's monthly salary is 1000 dollars]], which just shows that they're only meat shields to buy time for good old 'Murican freedom where the women are exempt from this meaningless conscription.
# Be cautious of any Koreans near you, [[Cho Seung-Hui|for one of them might want to go for a high score and blow up a college near you]].
# Any game from [[Starcraft|Blizzard]], [[League Of Legends|Riot]], or Nexon is just like oxygen for the Koreans, for if they stop playing it, they will die; [[World of Warcraft|they're much more important than their babies]].
# Koreans think their culture is unique, but it's basically a rip-off mix between [[Japan]] and [[China]].
# [[Fact|Koreans are much uglier and their eyes are much slantier]] than their [[Azn|Asian]] neighbors, that's why plastic surgery is so popular in Korea. Their faces are also flat, which is why they are called "panfaces."
# Every student who graduates each term, will receive a plastic surgery, because their panfaces deshape at least each year.
# No one gives a shit about Koreans (except for Koreans themselves of course, and the few, pathetic [[koreaboo|Koreaboos]]).
# Unlike other Asians who move to the US and become [[Yuppies]] (China) and [[Hipsters]] (Japan), Koreans tend to turn into gun-toting [[rednecks]].
# In [[Good Korea|South Korea]], people only purchase products from Korean brands (e.g. Samsung, Hyundai etc.). Purchasing anything from foreign brands will result in buttrape because people will think you're not supporting Korea.
# All Koreans are stalkers.
# If you think any of the above is false and are attempting to delete them, then you must be or at least partially Korean, because frankly non-Koreans never liked Koreans and always assumed they are the rudest and most pathetic group of people ever lived on Earth; and only Koreans think of themselves as pure and sinless.
# Koreans often are confused whether people are complimenting or insulting them. As a result, they resort to faggotry and act like dumbasses.
# Because their parents make them study constantly during childhood and adolescence, Koreans have no social skills and are extremely awkward around anyone who isn't Korean.
# There is always a Korean table in the dining hall of any major university. They do not mix with outsiders.
# They're rude, emotionally retarded, and reek of kim chee, garlic, and anchovies. Since they have panfaces, the average Korean male's face is frozen in an expression of unwarranted disdain.
# Korean women will stab to death their entire families for just a mere whiff of some white cock.
# They have nothing of their own. No tradition, but just copying others for the lulz and claiming it as a Korean invention.
# Had to invent the [[mukbang]] because half the population are friendless [[loser]]s.

==Korean Videos==
Most of them are shit nobody cares about, like Kim Jong-Il's penis size or [[Gay|faburous Korean history]], and the rikes. Enjoy these videos brought to you by the '''Korean Intelligence Agency'''.
{|style="margin:0 auto"
|{{frame|{{videoframe|koreavideos|background-color:#a5a5a5|font-weight:bold
|<youtube>P8XjcK06UXo</youtube> <center>'''The Korean National Anthem.'''</center>
|<youtube>Ptyzc4BQliY</youtube> <center></center>
|<youtube>xXxvsShaAoA</youtube> <center></center>
|<youtube>9bZkp7q19f0</youtube> <center>'''This is what Gay Korea is best known for.'''</center>}}|border=#a5a5a5|background=#a5a5a5}}
|}

==Famous Gooks==
* [[Cho Seung Hui]]
* [[Kim il sung]]
* [[Kim Jong Il]]
* [[Chan Ho Park|Park Chan Ho]]
* [[The Hipster Grifter]]
*The Gangnam Style Guy with the shitty dance moves

== See Also ==
*[[Japan]]
*[[Good Korea]]
*[[Best Korea]]
*[[China]]
*[[Asian]]
*[[Communism]]
*[[Homefront]]

== External Links ==

* [http://blog.empas.com/wwjang/list.html?c=1929499&v=content Korean crap]

{{race}}

{{Korea}}

{{4chanarchive|24618024|I'M KOREAN}}

{{commonwealth}}

[[Category: Locations]]

Korea

2026-05-15T10:47:07Z

Gooksu: /* Korean Videos */

{{offended}}
{{notice|S/Korea just Declared Martial Law !1!!}}
==Background==
[[Image:Koreanzerglings.jpg|thumb|left|ZERG RUSH!]]
[[File:Ahotkoreanman.jpg|thumb|left|A typical korean man]]
Once upon a time, Japan [[Surprise Sex|surprise buttsexed]] China, and '''''KOREA''''' is the prolapsed colon that resulted. During [[100 years ago|the 1950s]] Korea was the site of some epic [[RL drama]], when [[Lulz|war]] broke out between the North and South due to a lack of good ''[[Starcraft]]'' and ''[[League of Legends]]'' servers. After repeated [[Rape|defeats]], the South asked the [[America]]ns for help, in response the Americans and pretty much the rest of the world proceeded to [[Pwn|invade and drive back]] the North all the way to the Chinese border. However, more drama was to be begotten when paranoid [[chink]] commies, most armed with little more than their microscopic ding dongs, went apeshit and launched a surprise [[Raid|offensive]] on the UN armies, who, after some serious anal raping, then agreed to a [[GG|ceasefire]]. The [[Korean War]] initiated the proud American tradition of [[Freedom|bombing the shit out of other countries in order to save them]], and introduced the world to the noble Chinese tradition of rounding up a bunch of illiterate [[Mexicans|peasant]]s, giving them a couple of twigs, and forcing them into heroic, [[an hero|suicidal]] "[[Zerg rush|human wave]]" attacks. The border of North and South Korea hasn't changed since, with both sides engaging in a [[flame war|stand-off]].

There are a few Koreans in Japan, and the Japanese there, practicing exceedingly high standards concerning racial purity, treat them as [[niggers]].Also, the chasm between Western and Eastern part of Korea is high, as they try not to taint their royal [[Azn]] blood with niggers, white devils, or other Azns in Korea.

==Foods/Customs==

Korean dishes include boiled grasses, leaves, boiled dogs, boiled cows; anything that is boiled and cooked with red-pepper can be Korean. While some love Korean food, typical Korean dish, which consists of Kimchi, Radish-Kimchi, White-Kimchi, more Kimchi, and rice, is not edible to humans, except for maybe hungry people that live in Africa. The legend actually has it that koreans drip kimchi when they bleed.

Koreans have very odd custom of calling anyone older "hyung/oppa/nuna", which means older brother or older sister. As a result, in many case of Korean relationships, people say "my sister/brother" when they are having sex, which kind of explains why Japs(that came from Koreans) are obsessed with incest hentai. But Koreans don't have to do that since Korean couples engage in daily incest role play. Due to possible broken DNA resulting from incestuous relationships, we can still confirm that Koreans are very proud of their Korean heritage(which probably consists of copying other heritages.)

Most of the students in Korea are virgins, preparing to become great honorary [[Azn]] wizard. Their sports of choice include memorizing useless crap, watching K-pop when they are not sleeping, watching Japanese porn and hating Japs at possibly at the same time, and masturbating with their well plagiarized achievements. Although Koreans naturally suck at sports, they are better than any other ethnicity at talking about sports.

Recently Korean government banned pornography because Korean women could not stand the sight of women online that had bigger boobs and asses than them,(which is practically everyone in the world); however, Korean virgin males did not react because they were shamed of having [[Azn]] dicks.

Korean men like to brag about mandatory military service, which can best be likened to Auschwitz, except that it is worse because you would have to see Korean fags talk all day about K-pop and eat kimchi all day. Historians claim that faggotry practiced among Koreans stem from long history of slavery.(No, this is actually serious, slaves made up 50% of the population in the last Chosun dynasty of Korea). Naturally, Koreans are [[nigger]] asians; however, particular faggotry is practiced only among Korean themselves because people from other race actually stand up for themselves and beat the shit out of anyone who does it.

In their long shitty history, (imagine the never-ending series of [[sharknado]] movies), there have been no Korean historical figures that influenced the world in a positive manner; however, King Sejong and Lee-Soon-Shin are famous to test-makers in the US for making frequent appearances in the essay section of the SAT. Believe it or not, some conspiracy theories claim that [[Hitler]] had a Korean ancestry.

== Simplified ==
[[File:Koreanbaby.jpg|thumb|right|A typical Korean child can go through a litter during a picnic]]
[[File:Bestkorea.jpg|thumb|right|[[Pokemon|NORTH KOREA IS BEST KOREA!]]]]
[[Best Korea|North Korea]]: The pimps with the nukes. 
[[Good Korea|South Korea]]: The players with the shitty tech.
[[File:KoreanBDSMWhore.jpg|thumb|right|Americans brutally tortured Korean Civilians during the Korea War in both Koreas]]

According to [[Conservative|Samuel Huntington]] the whole idea is for Good Korea to inherit Evil Korea's Nukes after they all starve, thus joining the Nuclear Club, guilt-free.

== How to Troll a Korean ==
[[Image:chop.jpg|thumb|An actual Korean reaction to Takeshima related issues.]]
[[Image:Korean.jpg|thumb|The only sport Koreans give a shit about is [[Starcraft]].]]
# Say ''anything'' good about Japan at all. [[Seriously]], try it; it works. For more lulz, "mistake" them for Japanese: enjoy the effects.
# Go around saying that Koreans originate from Southeast Asia, like this [http://www.youtube.com/user/SouthEastAsianUnion/ gook], and all the studies done in major universities are all [[lulz|lulz]].
# Buy a Korean girl a fake designer purse (make sure it is a good fake, they have a sense that allows them to be able to sniff out all but the best fakes), have sex with her (should be no problem once she thinks you bought her something expensive with some French or Italian guy's name on it), then reveal to her that the purse is a fake that you bought off some Nigerian guy at a flea market for $10 and watch as her head implodes with rage.
# Say "Dokdo (Takeshima for more lulz) belongs to Japan!" This is guaranteed to send any Korean into an epic rage. An EPIC, EPIC RAGE.
# Explain to them how wonderful the Kim dynasty is, then ask their opinion on the family.
# Tell them that most Korean words come from China.
# Ask them how many times Korea has been invaded.
# Call them "gook," "chink," "Chinese," or "panface." (Obviously this is not trolling. Koreans will become [[Cho Seung Hui]])
# Tell a Korean girl she'd look so much better with an eye job.
# Tell them about your trip to Asia, and make sure to say that the Korean whores were the best.
# Tell a Korean man that your girlfriend is Korean.
# Ask if dog tastes good.
# Inform a Korean man that usually, when a Korean girl goes to college she can't get enough nigger dick.
# Tell a Korean man that his wife wasn't a virgin, she had hymen replacement surgery. Say that she was your girlfriend, during which time you fucked her as much as possible, and he's lucky to have such a sweet piece of ass.
# Tell them that Japanese is an infinitely more beautiful language than Korean.
# Tell them how Korea has [[truth|spent its entire history being the bitch of either China, Japan, or the USA]].
# Talk to them in Japanese and expect them to understand you completely.

Be careful; they often carry knives.

== Fun Facts ==
[[Image:Ugly south korean.png|thumb|right|300px|North Korean propaganda, but has immense troll value nonetheless.]]
* All Koreans have hardons for ''[[Starcraft]]''.
* Korean believe they are the best Asians, just like the Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese, Taiwanese- Oh FUCK it, [[Fact|all Asians are retarded]]. Except for the [[Philippines|Filipinos]], who make themselves everyone's bitch.
* All Koreans are extremely susceptible to unquestioning belief in urban myths and old wives tales; in modern times those backed by email chain letters or Korean news rather than any actual scientific evidence are particularly dangerous when released upon unsuspecting Koreans. A favorite is that eating dog will transform your vocal chords into those of an opera singer. Also, see [[fan death]].
* Koreans are actually aliens from the planet of Korethra. Your base ours is now.
*[[Incest|99% of Koreans bear the surname "Kim," "Lee," or "Park."]]
*one good example of someone with the surname kim is the hot kim tae hee , someone with lee is the hot lee ha nui or someone with pak is pak chae rim
* King Dong Dil, leader of North Korea, is actually a [[robot]].
* [[Korean cry|Korean tears]] are chemically unrelated to tears from any other ethnic group on the planet.
* Everything that goes wrong in Korea is the Japan's fault. If you insult or complain about Korea, you must be Japanese. No exceptions. Just ask the gooks.

== Typical Response to an American ==
# Yankee Go Home!
# [[I'M X|I'M KOREAN]]! SON OF A BITCH AMERICAN! AMERICAN IS PIG! DO YOU WANT CHEESEBURGER? DO YOU WANT PIZZA? AMERICAN IS PIG DISGUSTING! BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA IS MURDERER! FUCKING U.S.A!!!!1
# Your beef tastes like dog turds in glue.
# You mean nothing to us...except for Blizzard.
# KKKKIIILLLL NNNNOOOORRRRTTTTHHH KOOORREEEAAAAA
# But After the 2010s, South Korean sentiment toward the United States has come to favor the United States, with the exception of a few anti-Americans.

<center>[[Image:Boiled alive dogs asians.jpg|thumb|center|600px|Fun fact: koreans love dog meat, hell, [[DO IT FAGGOT|you can even taste one in a korean restaurant!]]]]</center>

== Brutally True Facts About Koreans ==
[[File:Average Penis Size Throughout the World.jpg|thumb|Korean men have the smallest dicks in the world]]
# They [[Fact|smell.]]
# North Koreans are mind-fucked and think their country is full of purity thanks to their grorious reader.
# Lower-class Koreans are extremely hot-headed, any words that sounds like an insult towards them and they will punch you in the face with no remorse.
# Koreans are either people that are mentioned above, or SAT nerds with giant glasses and loads of SAT-prep books stacking in their room just so they can try and get into Harvard, but usually end up going to some school for rich Korean failures like Bucknell.
# Koreans eat dogs. They really do, and they really don't like to talk about it.
# The Koreans are the only race on the planet that are both more xenophobic and materialistic than the [[Jews]].
# Koreans think they are tough shit and are better than Americans, but the sad truth is if it wasn't for [[America]] saving their sorry asses back in Korean War, the entire peninsula will be buttraped by the [[Best Korea|grorious reader]]. America is still saving their asses by patrolling the DMZ. If it weren't for the U.S., South Korea would belong to Kim Jong-Il.
# Koreans think [[Fact|their history consists of 5,000 years, but 95% of it are lies]].
# They come to America and/or the Philippines for education, because [[Fact|Korean universities are hellholes of suicide epidemics.]]
# Koreans look down on any non-Koreans just because they are Koreans.
# Every individual Korean must stay within 30 feet of another Korean, for if one doesn't stay close enough to another for a day, he will slowly rot to the ground.
# The term "Gold Digger" is actually derived from the first Empress of Korea named Queen Geul Dik-geon, who would only ovulate after her lover, the first Emperor of Korea, spent well over the equivalent of modern $100 million USD on designer hand bags, shoes, and plastic surgery for her. The pair went on to father the Korean people, with this trait still being seen today in all Korean women.
# Koreans actually believe Japanese Samurai originated from Korean [[Bullshit|Samurang]].
# On the rare occasion a Korean immigrant converses with someone of a different ethnicity, they'll go on and on about how great their home country is, despite having jumped at the chance to move to the nation they currently live in.
# [[Kpop]] is used to hide their country's truth, just to only get their attention and its good images. They get so butthurt whenever someone (doesn't need to be anti-sentimental or so) exposes them into complete misery.
# Their education is consistent of Hangul, and about the fucking island of Dokdo (Oh scratch that, Dokdo isn't even their land! LOL, it was Takeshima!)
# Many Koreans, especially the ones in America, are hard-core evangelical Christians, and will openly discuss religion anywhere, anytime. Do not be surprised if a Korean sitting next to you on the bus asks you if you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. If you say, "no," he will proceed to give you a sermon, telling you that you will certainly go to hell. If you try to get away from him, he will follow you.
# You should be glad you're not a [[Good Korea|South Korean]] citizen, because all male citizens are required to serve 2 years in the military, which is basically worthless since they're gonna suck America's cock for help again once there is a war. Most of their time is spent sucking their CO's cocks to not get beaten up and <s>pulling out weeds with their bare hands while they're paid $100 a month to do so</s> [[Shit nobody cares about|As of 2026, a soldier's monthly salary is 1000 dollars]], which just shows that they're only meat shields to buy time for good old 'Murican freedom where the women are exempt from this meaningless conscription.
# Be cautious of any Koreans near you, [[Cho Seung-Hui|for one of them might want to go for a high score and blow up a college near you]].
# Any game from [[Starcraft|Blizzard]], [[League Of Legends|Riot]], or Nexon is just like oxygen for the Koreans, for if they stop playing it, they will die; [[World of Warcraft|they're much more important than their babies]].
# Koreans think their culture is unique, but it's basically a rip-off mix between [[Japan]] and [[China]].
# [[Fact|Koreans are much uglier and their eyes are much slantier]] than their [[Azn|Asian]] neighbors, that's why plastic surgery is so popular in Korea. Their faces are also flat, which is why they are called "panfaces."
# Every student who graduates each term, will receive a plastic surgery, because their panfaces deshape at least each year.
# No one gives a shit about Koreans (except for Koreans themselves of course, and the few, pathetic [[koreaboo|Koreaboos]]).
# Unlike other Asians who move to the US and become [[Yuppies]] (China) and [[Hipsters]] (Japan), Koreans tend to turn into gun-toting [[rednecks]].
# In [[Good Korea|South Korea]], people only purchase products from Korean brands (e.g. Samsung, Hyundai etc.). Purchasing anything from foreign brands will result in buttrape because people will think you're not supporting Korea.
# All Koreans are stalkers.
# If you think any of the above is false and are attempting to delete them, then you must be or at least partially Korean, because frankly non-Koreans never liked Koreans and always assumed they are the rudest and most pathetic group of people ever lived on Earth; and only Koreans think of themselves as pure and sinless.
# Koreans often are confused whether people are complimenting or insulting them. As a result, they resort to faggotry and act like dumbasses.
# Because their parents make them study constantly during childhood and adolescence, Koreans have no social skills and are extremely awkward around anyone who isn't Korean.
# There is always a Korean table in the dining hall of any major university. They do not mix with outsiders.
# They're rude, emotionally retarded, and reek of kim chee, garlic, and anchovies. Since they have panfaces, the average Korean male's face is frozen in an expression of unwarranted disdain.
# Korean women will stab to death their entire families for just a mere whiff of some white cock.
# They have nothing of their own. No tradition, but just copying others for the lulz and claiming it as a Korean invention.
# Had to invent the [[mukbang]] because half the population are friendless [[loser]]s.

==Korean Videos==
Most of them are shit nobody cares about, like Kim Jong-Il's penis size or [[Gay|faburous Korean history]], and the rikes. Enjoy these videos brought to you by the '''Korean Intelligence Agency'''.
{|style="margin:0 auto"
|{{frame|{{videoframe|koreavideos|background-color:#a5a5a5|font-weight:bold
|<youtube>P8XjcK06UXo</youtube> <center>'''The Korean National Anthem.'''</center>
|<youtube>Ptyzc4BQliY</youtube> <center></center>
|<youtube>xXxvsShaAoA</youtube> <center></center>
|<youtube>9bZkp7q19f0</youtube> <center>'''This is what Gay Korea is best known for.'''</center>}}|border=#a5a5a5|background=#a5a5a5}}
|}

==Famous Gooks==
* [[Cho Seung Hui]]
* [[Kim il sung]]
* [[Kim Jong Il]]
* [[Chan Ho Park|Park Chan Ho]]
* [[The Hipster Grifter]]
*The Gangnam Style Guy with the shitty dance moves

== See Also ==
*[[Japan]]
*[[Good Korea]]
*[[Best Korea]]
*[[China]]
*[[Asian]]
*[[Communism]]
*[[Homefront]]

== External Links ==

* [http://blog.empas.com/wwjang/list.html?c=1929499&v=content Korean crap]

{{race}}

{{Korea}}

{{4chanarchive|24618024|I'M KOREAN}}

{{commonwealth}}

[[Category: Locations]]

Japan

2026-05-15T10:40:01Z

Gooksu: /* Japanese Language */

:''"[[Jap]]" redirects here. For [[Jewish]] [[American]] [[Disney|Princess]], see [[Kikes]].''

{{offended}}
{{achtung|FORMER JAPANESE PRIME MINISTER <s>GOT</s> WAS SHOT DURING A CAMPAIGN AND WILL SOON BE WORM RIDDEN}}
{{Warning|JAPAN HAS RAISED THE AGE OF CONSENT FROM 13 TO 16}}
{{breakingnews|[https://www.japantimes.co.jp/news/2015/07/15/national/crime-legal/hit-global-criticism-japan-bans-individual-possession-child-porn-images-manga-exempt/#.VaYNdfmqqlQ JAPAN BANS POSSESSION OF CHILD PORN]}}
{{spoilers|JAPANESE MEN COOK THEIR OWN [[Penis|GENITALS]] AND [[HA HA HA, OH WOW|EAT THEM]], JAPANESE DAOYU ISLAND OWNER IS A CORRUPTED [[Pedophile|PEDOPHILE]] CAPITALIST, HIS WIFE TRIED TO [[AN HERO]], AND [[Liar|HE LIED OVER 9000 DOLLARS FROM ALL JAP AND OTAKUS!]]}}

[[File:Crappingoutjapan.jpg|thumb|As always, [[South Korea]] best explains the origin of the Jewpanese Islands.]]
[[File:Japanese family.jpg|thumb|Typical Japanese family]]
[[File:1339001142310.jpg|thumb|The Japs now thank the Atomic Bomb in making their [[Shit|art]] [[Anime|a]] [[Hentai|lot]] [[Guro|better]].]]
[[Image:Japaninanutshell.jpg|thumb|[[Evolution]]]]
[[File:The "shi" creators.jpg|thumb|350px|Japanese with name containing "[[2 girls 1 cup|shi]]", creates great things.]]
[[File:Japanesepenis.gif|thumb|350px|Japanese men have small dicks]]
[[File:norapenobase.jpg|thumb|350px|Japanese women require American Army Dick and will withhold base to get it. No rape? Then no base!]]
'''The Democratic People's Republic of Animestan''' (also known as '''Jewpan''', '''[[Weeaboo]]topia''' and '''Nuclear Testing Site''') or more commonly known politically-correct as '''Japan''' is a totalitarian fifth-world dystopia on a radioactive wasteland in the Pacific Ocean with less sanity and human rights than even [[Best Korea]]. It is best known for being the inventors of [[anime]] and therefore being the #1 cause of [[Asperger's Syndrome]] on the planet. Their [[Basement-dweller|men]] are autistic [[sick fuck]]s who enjoy raping [[loli|little girls]], and their women are [[Whore|gold-digging]] pathological liars who would rather go marry and scam rich foreigners than fuck their own manchildren back home.

Japan is basically to Asia what [[Israel]] is to the Middle East. Both are ruled by racist criminal mobsters (Yakuza vs Zionist Illuminati) and have a history of both being genocided (Hiroshima and US concentration camps vs Holocaust and German concentration camps) while committing genocide at the same time (Koreans are Japan's Palestinians). Every single nation in Asia (with the sole exception of the Japanese's loyal sex slaves, the [[Philippines|sea niggers]]) hates Japan and would want to erase this microstate of degenerates off the Earth if not for the [[Jewnited States]] giving them military equipment... again just like Israel. Japan's current military is the 9th strongest in the world, but there are some bases that are still [[All Your Base Are Belong To Us|used by Americans]], again, just like Israel. ''And for the last time, just like the Kikes'', the Japs control the Internet media through their use of viral [[meme]]s and [[hentai|degenerate entertainment]], but the Jews at least won't resort to shitty cartoons (unless you're [[MLP|Lauren Faust]]) to mind control half the human population into instant [[retard]]s. Japanese women are also known as [[Hillary Clinton|filthy amoral and borderline-sociopathic]] [[feminists]] who have an obsession with your [[Jew Gold]] and will only date you so that she can blackmail you for money (e.g. the Chikan false rape accusations) then Hannibal-Lecter you into suicide. Wonder if all Japs need a massive nose to pass them off as kikes.

[[File:Russian roullete.jpg|thumb|350px|For the record, some toys from Japan look like this]]

Japan is a perfect example of [[b/|"not-as-good-as-it-used-to-be."]] Before being raped by the atom bomb, Japan was busy doing just that to [[Ireland|inferior countries]], but with a Katana instead of the mighty power of the atom. After the USA's rampage, however, it degraded into what you see now. Most of Japan's population has [[aspergers]] caused by the radioactive [[PWNED|bombs we dropped on their asses]]. That—combined with the fact that every Japanese man, woman, and child is on [[crack]]—explains why everything Japan makes is so fucking weird. But somehow, Japan loves [[Germany]]: the whores want to suck Hitler's dick while he himself called them honorary Aryans. The most plausible theory on why [[Hitler]] could love who amounts to Asian Jews is because the Japanese used to be a bunch of strict decent honorable and civilized humans until a [[Albert Einstein|Jewish aspie]] invented the nuke [[IDIFTL|for Science]] and therefore spread his radiation upon the entire Japanese population, mutating them all into the Aspie Jews they are today.

Japan is known for being the country with the lowest calculated crime rate in the entire universe. Which isn't that surprising when you think about it, since Japan doesn't count drug dealing, prostitution, necrophilia, pedophilia, weapon dealing, extortion, blackmail, cannibalism, male rape, and Yakuza (Japanese impersonators of Elvis) gang wars as "crimes".

Japs rarely exceed 150 cm in height. Most Japs would much rather be white, and some undergo limited ''caucasiaplasty'' to this end. Also, since they [[Pro-Ana|have a very light diet]], the vast majority of Japanese [[wimmins]] have no [[tits]]. The few who have large tits end up as [[whores]], which explains why porn of titted Japs exists. Theoretically, this could be solved with a little whale milk, but since they [[Whale Wars|kill whales]] just to be [[conservative]], they produce a nice duality, as an endangered Pacific string bean that's good for nothing and an endangered Pacific tub of lard that's good for nothing.

To their credit, they create good cameras and televisions and have invented flash memory that is used in USB sticks.

{{archive|zF8JL|An expert describes why Japan is so full of fail (TL;DR)}}

[[Image:Anti-jp.jpg|thumb|Bestselling Sign in Asia.]]

==[[World War II|History]]==
Japan was founded at least 100 years ago during the time of Adam and Eve and the dinosaurs, way before Jesus. The first emperor of Japan was Jimmu, crowned in 600BC. The most famous emperor of Japan was Hirohito (Showa).

[[Image:Hiroshima_bomb.jpg|thumb|left|pwnt]]
[[Image:Japanese Woman cuts off Chinese penis.gif|thumb|Japanese conducted torture and mass experiments on Chinese during [[World War II]], and their women castrated the entire Chinese male population. Here a Japanese woman cuts off a [[Chinese]] man's [[penis]].]]

{{quote|It really surprised me that the Japanese sided with the Nazis during World War II. They're usually so polite.}} 

After having messy [[buttsecks]] with [[Hitler]], Emperor Hirohito sent his buttboy, Tojo, and troops into Korea to buy Tamagotchis. The Japanese soldiers proceeded to rape, pillage and [[bukkake]] the Koreans and Chinese to near-annihilation. Afterwards, the Jap troops then proceeded to fuck the corpses of the women they killed.

President Roosevelt sent a telegram to Hirohito requesting [[buttsecks]] too, but due to a mis-translation, the Japanese flew over Pearl Harbour and sunk a few battleships by dropping Mitsubishis and Pocky from their Gundams.

Your grandmother decided it was a good idea to build some bullets and bombs, but the United States needed someone to test the bombs on, and who better than a bunch of antagonistic slopes? [[Americunts]] considered fighting them hand to hand, but decided Japs weren't even worth the time. [[truth|The nukes were a most practical and efficient way]]. So Truman [[and nothing of value was lost|pwned the fuck out of Hiroshima on August 6th, 1945.]] But that cunt Tojo wouldn't surrender. To shut Japan the fuck up, Truman [[pwnt|bombed]] [[Shit no one cares about|Nagasaki]] three days later, [[for the lulz]].

Japan surrendered, and to this day have been the bitch of the [[America|USA]].

Fun Fact: The Epicness of the bombings would continue to show for years to come as [[over 9000|hundreds of thousands]] of civilians died from [[Epic Win|horrifying radiation poisoning, hideous mutations]] and other shit nobody cares about, except for Koreans who rightfully point and laugh every chance they get.
[[Image:typical_japfag.jpg|thumb|left|Typical japfag]]

==The Japanese are an Endangered Species==

[[File:Rapistgook.png|thumb|left|The [[typical]] Japanese salaryman, a lowly degenerate pedophile with no concept of morals.]]
[[Image:Jap_pop_chart.png‎|thumb|100px|The Japanese: an Endangered Species]]
[[File:Sumo Love.jpg|thumb|Why Japs don't have sex]]
[[Image:Autojerker.jpg|thumb|Also why Japs don't have sex]]
[[File:1071358018863.jpg|thumb|They literally never have sex]]
[[File:Friendmaker.png|185px|right]]

With poetry skills to rival even the most hardened [[emo]], Japan was once the world's foremost macho culture. Big mustaches, leather clothes, manly sex between friends in bath houses—it was all there. Nippon is also the land of the Hot Babe. In Japan, the streets teem with the same seething, supple-limbed female honeys for which the Land of the Rising Sun has always been famous -- ''and each and every one of them longs for a real man to [[guro|Put It To Her]] the good old fashioned way''.

That is, until the Kikes and their [[America|imperialist]] [[England|ambitions]] came. The Kikes wanted to fuck all of the hot wahmen, only to find angry Samurai ready to chop their dicks off for trying. So, they turned to using Britain to bankrupt China during the Opium wars. Japan, not wanting to be bankrupted by Jew degeneracy as China was, became best friends with [[Hitler]]- a man who [[Weeaboo| admired them as Honorary Aryans with better culture than his own German race]]. Because of this, the Jewnited States dropped the nuke of retardation that changed Japan forever.

[[truth|It is a proven fact that the only real men left in Japan were killed in WWII and as a result, the Japs are not even having enough children to make up for the annual number of deaths: they are an endangered species]] [see chart -- yes, it's for real]. They are now forced to import [[Niggers|Filipinos]] in a vain attempt to make up the difference.

Now all the men in Japan look like women and [[gay|actively play the part]]. Instead of boning the most fabulous babes on earth and breeding a new generation of ass-whipping samurai, these quasi-men prefer whacking off to cartoon characters getting their heads eaten, playing with toys, and spending hours at a time in deep ass play.

One of the contributing factors of the population decline is that of all of Chinks, modern Japanese men have the smallest penises(notice how all of the japs in this article have micro dicks). As a result, Japanese girls have become ruthless feminist gold diggers who will only use the men for money then leave them to die off once they have outlived their usefulness. But despite being feminists Japanese women crave the slightly bigger White cock or the [[lie|giant]] [[The Great Black Dick Hoax|Black Cock]] and are completely submissive to [[White]] and Black men. Yes, even though the Japanese are famously [[racist]] against {{wayback|http://nsjap.net/|20050628013438|title=every other race}}, this need not rule out even the spottiest [[Ginger|Irish]] or fattest American [[Star Trek]] geek as long as they have the cash and/or cock they want.

The men, due to brain cancer and mental retardation caused by the radiation, became [[sick fuck]] necrophiliacs that like to kill and rape female corpses and masturbate to schoolgirls in thigh-high socks getting strangled with their own entrails. Even Japan knows that [http://www.sankakucomplex.com/2011/01/13/third-of-young-japanese-men-hate-sex/ 1/3 of Japanese men hate sex] and thus because of [[Kike|Einstein]], it has always been this way.

[[Pedophilia]], like guro and necrophilia, is not only accepted in Japan, but also compulsory. The '''{{archive|oBrB|age of consent in Japan}}''' is 13, but usually it actually happens around the age of six. [[At least 100|110%]] of Japanese men are pedofags. [[CP]] is the leading export of Japan and they plan to spread it across the world. Many students have open relationships with their teachers and when the Japs heard that the teachers, coaches and priests from Jewmerica back in early 2000s were molesting little children, their response was "We can do better than that." None of this helps the birth rate, however because these cowardly microdick fucks don't have the balls to fuck a fertile adult or teen bitch. Their birth rates continue to drop and if we're lucky enough to see <s>Susanowo</s> Poseidon throw another lulzy tsunami at these tojos, this entire country of degenerates is expected to die out by 2030.

==FFFUUUCHKA YOUU WWAAAHLEEARU !!!!!!!!!==
:''For more details, see: [[Whale Wars]]''
[[Image:Japan Australia whaling.jpg|thumb|left|100px|Japan vs Australia in countryball form.]]
Japan's favorite pastime, other than [[bukkake]], raping corpses, and working until their eyes and brain bleed from not sleeping, is viciously slaying the evil whale and/or dolphin menace. In fact the whole reason behind their space program is so they can be [[Futurama|whalers on the moon]].

[[Last Thursday]], the [[Australia|Australian]] government asked Japan to stop <s>whaling</s> [[beastiality|harvesting whales for science]] in Australian Antarctic waters, because you should only kill endangered species in your own country.

[[BAWWW|Being a teeny-tiny bit sensitive to criticism]], Japanese [[JewTube|YouTubers]] and their [[Wapanese|sympathizers]] proceeded to hurl every bizarre insult at Australia that they could think of through the medium of KikeTube comments and [[TL;DW]] videos—in [[Engrish|hilariously broken English]]. It would appear that Australia only cares about animals that look cute—they are [[lolwut|kangaroo-killing hypocrites]], who want to destroy the Japanese culture like they did to the [[Aboriginals]]. This is totally OK.

How Aussies telling the Japs to GTFO of THEIR waters will stop them is unclear at this point. But much like the Chinese civilians after the last Japanese invasion of China, the Aussies are clearly [[asking for it|asking for a decapitated-neckhole rapin’]].

Most Aussies won't argue that whaling is better than the Japanese soldiers [[vore|eating]] prisoners of war. [[Wikipedia:Japanese war crimes#Cannibalism|Read all about it!]] (Also note how long the list of war-crimes is.)

==[[Japan Crisis of 2011|Lulzy Earthquakes]]==

[[Last Thursday]] Japan was hit by a [[Hæti|huge earthquake]] of [[over 9000]] magnitude. This, of course, is not surprising because Japan is about as prone to natural disasters (magnified by their own [[derp|retardation ]]) as [[Africa]] is to [[AIDS]]. To amplify the mental retardation, they built nuclear reactors close to the shoreline. Oh Japan, you so craaaaazy.

What is surprising, however, is that one of the world's richest nations has completely failed to prepare for this inevitable pwning by GodJesus and as a result, civilized countries like [[Isreal]] and the U.S. must lend the Japanese tree fiddy, so that they can rebuild all the animu studios and child sex factories destroyed by the disaster.

The earthquake did however, kill thousands of Japs. This granted those Japs their sexual fantasies and their radioactive corpses served as the sex toys for the survivng Japanese. Rumor has it that some of the Japanese are still skull-fucking their bones today.

[[Image:Nuclear Simpsons.jpg|thumb|Where off switch?]]

[[Image:Japantsunami.jpg|thumb|Pwnt by a tsunami minutes after being pwnt by an earthquake and then getting pwnt by radiation]]

==[[Wapanese|Japanophiles]]==

[[Image:Cosplay.jpg|thumb|Every [[cosplay]]er ever]]
[[Image:Wtf_Japanese_butt_gun.gif|thumb|Japanese technology is being adapted to deter rapists and [[Weeaboo]]s]]

The purest form of [[faggotry]]...

[[Weeaboos|Japanophiles]] are [[White|western people]] who love everything to do with Japan, even the [[creepy]] shit, like the coin-operated panty dispensers and [[ganguro|blackfaced, autistically screeching wahmen]]. They are usually [[fat]] and [[Basement dweller|socially inept]] (male), or fat and [[retard|delusional about their looks]] (female) and can be identified by their ''[[Cowboy Bebop]]'' ([[Naruto]] [[lie|is the new coolect animu evar that will still be popular in 100 years!]]) wallscrolls, appreciation for [[J-pop]] and insistence on [[cosplay]]ing. Not to mention walking around the city with a fucking [[Pocky]] sticking out of the mouth. Many [[Wapanese|Japanophiles]] are to be found at Colleges such as Earlham and Oberlin, where they form [[anime]] clubs and dress up like [[furfags|retarded faggy space elves with fox ears and capes]].

Japanophilia is not to be confused with [[pedophilia]], as there are several key differences. For example, [[ohbutyouwillpet|pedophiles]] are obsessed with making love to children whereas [[Applemilk1988|weeaboos]] are obsessed with <s>Anime</s> degeneracy, writing with chopsticks, [[Bittorrent|downloading gigabytes]] of [[hentai]] and annoying the fuck out of you at parties by [[TL;DR|talking at length]] about their [[Bullshit|interpretation]] of ''[[Neon Genesis Evangelion]]''. Both, however, masturbate over [[Lolicon|pictures of schoolgirls]].

Weebfags do not reproduce by [[Secks|conventional means]]; most die as [[virgin]]s and those that do not are usually imprisoned for [[rape]]. Instead, they use the [[internet]] to influence vulnerable teenagers to watch episodes of ''[[Animu|Trigun]]'' before leading them on to the [[Erection|harder]] (and [[Computer Science III|less comprehensible]]) [[Crap|stuff]]. Soon the [[anime]] [[meme]] has infected the poor teen's [[brain]] and he has become a mindless Japanophile too.

The Japanophile's life cycle can end three ways; either dying an elderly virgin surrounded by small plastic figurines that cost hundreds of dollars each, being raped to death in prison (oh, [[teh]] [[irony]]!) or committing [[Suicide|IRL self-pwnage]] after arriving at Japan and discovering that it's not full of enormously-breasted women who want to sleep with pasty, gaijin lardballs. The [[NOVA|last words]] of the latter Japanophiles are usually "[[Megatokyo]] lied to me..."

FUN FACT: [[irony|Converse to how Weeaboos dry hump anything to do with Japanese culture, western culture is actually popular among Japanese teenagers]]. Proof of this is displayed with how many Japs dye their hair blonde and speak English.

==Japanese Language==
[[Image:Commit Sudoku.png|thumb|400 px|<s>Seppuku</s> SUDOKU!]]
[[Moonspeak|Japanese]] is a language learned by [[Weeaboos|retards]] affected by severe [[Filthy Frank|Pink Guy Disease]] who claim that they're learning it because they "enjoy Japanese culture" when they're actually enjoying [[Animu|anime]]. The "Japanese culture" they enjoy learnin' about can also involve Japan's most dark stuff, like Shintoism/Buddhism and other false gods, ritualistic suicide, Unit 731 (a chemical/biological warfare research unit in a Japanese puppet state), and of course, ''all those damn earthquakes, floods, and other weather shit.''

For their years of rigorous training, Japanese language teachers get to instruct unmotivated American teenagers with [[Filthy Frank|Pink Guy Disease]] and/or [[Acute Cultural Conformist Syndrome]] in the basics again and again while one half writes ''[[Ouran High School Host Club]]/[[Harry Potter]]'' [[crossover]] [[fanfiction]] in class and the other watches the latest fan-subbed ninja fan-service anime on their [[mac|$2,000 laptops]]. Even though a tiny percentage actually finish the course, they have no real use for it other than fansubbing [[anime]] or re-translating a ''[[Final Fantasy]]'' game. If you're hopeful, ''at least'' a very tiny amount of those weens will cheerfully master Japanese to work as humble, cheerful overseas protestant Christian pastors, '''as only 1% of Japs in the ENTIRE NATION claim to be Christians. This is absolutely true.'''

[[fail|This is a worthwhile use of their time since at least 99.05% of American translators are close-minded]] [[Elite|Worldwide Tech Oligarchy]] supporting, marxist AmeriKKKans who are unable to understand the elevated cultural value of Japanese children's cartoons]]. As strange as it sounds, the last sentence is not irony. No, it's just stupid.
[[Image:Google_Translate_Engrish.png|thumb|341 px|[[Google]] Transrate fails, defaults to [[Engrish]]]]
In addition to speaking their [[Moonspeak|native tongue]], the Japanese also speak an interesting language called [[Engrish]], which can be seen on many slave-produced billboards and products.Their writing system consists of over 9000 brain-exploding, complicated symbols stolen from [[Taiwan|Tiny China]] by anime [[pirates]]; only a few simplified ones are used in their alphabet, and naturally took on the appearance of destructive whaling harpoons, deadly katanas and morally toxic dildos of all kinds/every dildo known to men.

In the video section, please to find a Demo of their so called... ":*(&^%$^ENGRISH^$%^&)*:" It has an accurate subtitle...

===How to get around in Japan===
[[Image:Japanese period.jpg|thumb|150px|Japanese Flag]]
Since we at ED care about your Japanese experience, we've collected some useful Japanese phrases you can use when you meet a Jap!

*''Boku/Pocky wa _________'' - My name is ________.
*''Kyokon dii~rudo wo tabetai'' - I would like to eat some delicious cake.
*''Sono shimbun wo kaimashita'' - I am not fluent in Japanese, can we speak English?
*''Kimi no imouto wo reipu shitai'' - Please take a seat over there...
*''Anime wo mitari, manga wo yondari shitai'' - I want to do things like watch anime and read manga.
*''DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU'' - I am not a Weaboo, now will you stop looking at me like that?
*''Chin-chin wo namesaseruzo'' - Problem, officer?

==How To Troll Japs==
[[Image:orangebear.jpg|thumb|right|160px|[[Serious business|Yeah]].]]
[[File:Neko Cock.gif|thumb|Beckoning.]]

In what could be one of the most hilarious cases of Irony of all time, the most expertised in trolling the Japanese, are in fact, their own demonspawn, the [[weeaboo]]s, even if they aren't doing it intentionally. The Japanese want to present themselves to the world as civilized strict people and do this by shunning NEETs (euphemism for [[aspie]]s) and putting them in mental hospitals but once a fat wapanese dressed in a Sailor Moon costume and smells of Pocky lands shouting "BAKASUGOIKAWAIIDESUNE" everywhere and raiding used Japanese schoolgirls' panties, the masquerate of discipline is shattered and reveals Japan for the aspie-infested [[lolcow|laughing stock of the world]] that it is. This is why, if you ever meet a person who is decently mannered and seems normal, but reveals he is in fact Japanese, then binge yourself on [[4chan]], [[TV Tropes]], [[Pokemon]] and the most disgusting Hentai you can ever find on the Internet, inform everyone of the truth and in front of the Jap reenact everything in a barrage of Sugoikawaiibakadesune ala [[Chris-chan]] on steroids. With everyone knowing that this disgusting autistic shit is Japanese Culture, he will definitely be humiliated forever and possibly bullied to [[suicide|harakiri]].

Of course, using this tactic is like a Palestinian strapping a suicide bomb upon himself to kill Kikes, since if your audience is too short-sighted then they may assume you, not him, as the aspie. There are less effective, but safer methods, however.

*Say anything good about Korea (both Koreas), anything at all.
*Say that Zettai ryouiki is [[overrated]]. (Really it is)
*Tell them how Dokdo and Diaoyu are parts of Korea and China, Iturup, Kunashir, Shikotan are parts of Russia and "Takeshima" & "Senkaku" are just [[pussy]] land grabs.
*If you're a female, don't wear thigh-high socks, pantyhose, or other hosiery. Japs are Arabs with legs and despise uncovered legs with a fiery hate. Going bare-legged to the Japanese is considered the ultimate blasphemy and worse than murder. They will kill any girl that doesn't and rape her corpse.
*If you produce hentai, never draw any character wearing thigh-high socks, pantyhose, or other hosiery. (WARNING, you might get killed.) If you're Japanese doing this will be considered the highest of highest treason in Japan.
*Tell them that Hiroshima and Nagasaki were the happiest moments of the HUMAN race. Yes, Japs are retarded evil monkeys designed by [[Xenu]]
*Tell the Japanese that they are now America's economic bottom bitch despite the fact that they are one of the most wealthy nations in the world. That's what they deserved for trying to over-expand their borders during WWII and then getting pwned by Amurika!
*Spell the Japanese capital with an 'i' instead of a 'y'.
*Post a picture of a nuclear explosion with the caption "[[pwnd]]".
*Post a picture of Japanese internment camps with the caption "[[pwnd]]". For more lulz, praise Michelle Malkin's book of Japanese internment.
*Deliberately confuse them with [[Korea|Gooks]].
*Talk to them in Korean or Chinese, and expect them to understand you completely.
*Say karaoke is Korean.
*Call them "Japs", "[[Azn]]", or [[Pokemon|Pokeymanz]].
*Show 'em this (although they might fap to it):
 
<center>{{frame|<youtube>sOFg8oWMHRM</youtube>
<center>'''So [[kawaii]], amirite?'''}}</center>
 
*Produce hentai without Zettai ryouiki (and all other hosiery and thighhigh legwear) AND without death, guro, and snuff.
*Say that you learned Japanese tradition through [[anime]].
*Tell them that China can invade Japan at any time.
*Tell them that North Korea can Nuke them at any time.
*Brought up any atrocities they committed during WW2 Such as the Nanjing massacre, If they told you that they deserve it, brought up all the Jap wahmen the Americunts and the Ruskies raped during the occupation or any of the atrocities the Soviets committed against them and ask them if they deserve it as well. bonus point if they rage quitted and blocked you.
*Remind them if it wasn't for the Americunts, they would've been a province of China or Russia by now.
*Never use png image format. (Like their hentai, oversized things arouse them)
*Post a low-res picture of Japan being ejaculated upon by multiple high-res penises.
*Mention that they come from Korea and everything in their culture is Korean.
*Tell them that they originate in Southeast Asia.
*Walk by a schoolgirl.
*Then tell them what retards they are for going all "dumbshit fantard" over some shitty Jpop singer for no other reason than that he's Japanese.
*Upload a ton of Jap-made mods for Japanese games up for free downloading. The more uploaded for download, the better. MikuMikudance is a perfect example because the MMD community treats the game and themselves as some sort of fucking secret club. Often times on the few downloads they offer they put secret passwords on them. And so they get really pissed off about MMD stuff being shared (as well as passwords and links). [[Irony|They especially get mad when R18 models and videos are made.]] And make them easy and convenient to download; that will surely enrage the retarded Japs.
*Tell them that you don't like snuff and guro
*Tell them that there is no such thing as a pure Japanese.
*Tell them that they came from [[Jews|the Kikes]], especially since the degenerate Kikes have influence in their government.
*Tell them you like [[Godzilla|Godzilla]]
*Mention the war crimes commited by their military in WWII.

==Brutally True Facts==

[[File:Meanwhile in Japan.png|thumb|One of the most popular [[sport]]s in Japan.]]
[[File:Horyshit.jpg|thumb|Japanese man at work]]

*All Japanese citizens have [[Ass Burgers]], and most of them are [[weird|introverts]].
*[[Pink Guy Disease]] has become such an epidemic in Japan, that all Japanese infants are mandated to be screened by domestic therapists and doctors for [[autism|the tisms'.]]
*PGD sufferers in Japan spend their whole childhoods in dirty, worn-down, [[liberalism|leftist]] [[retarded|Special Sylum's]] or self-contained leftist classrooms, and are left without meaningful jobs when they become adults (other than manufacturing your [[anime|slave-made animu merchandise and figures]]).
*'''Pink Guy Disease has increased in Japan over 933%''' due to the introduction of [[minimalism|Flat Design]], Otaku tourism, and [[YouTube Kids]] and all its vile platforms orchestrated by that [[Hollywood|globalist, fascist Hollywood corp]] called [[YouTube]].
*All Japanese citizens are on [[crack]] in AT LEAST SOME KIND OF FORM, from colorful Konpeito candies to actual [[Venezuela|Venezuelan]] cocaine. This fact brought to you by ED's own Japanese editor, [[Kazuhiro]].
*All male Japanese are either [[drag queens]] or [[transexuals]] or [[80 year old Chinese man in panties|perverted old]] basement dwellers who sell hentai doujins. It's now almost impossible to find good, moral male Japs who are still alive (and sell pure, non-perv thingies, like [[candy|candied vegetables]] or [[Spongebob Rectal Thermometer|singing battery-operated herbal suppositories]]).
*All Japanese politician's are controlled by socialist fascist Yakuza. Also, it is legal to impersonate Yakuza in Japan.
*All male Japanese are omega as fuck ('''due to a lack of good manly male jobs''' in Wapan-Warudo/World for them) and only get their pieces of strawberry-flavored bum-bum from sex dolls, pillows with their favorite characters printed on them, and corpses from ritualistic Buddhist/Shinto behaviours.
*All female Japanese [[Cockmongler|love great white cock]] and suffer from either [[depression]] or [[megalomania]]. '''If a Japanese mom's kid turns out disabled for whatever reason''' ([[weeaboo|down syndrome]], [[asperger's syndrome|the tisms']], [[Shaye Saint John|traumatic bodily injury from a Shinkansen train accident]] or whatnot), '''her effeminate husband gets divorced and she becomes single.'''
*Japan is known for its [[socialism|socialistic]] ways disguised as [[capitalism]]. In fact, a Jap will do just about anything for a few bucks, including loving you long time for $10 <s>(that's [[Vietnam]] dumbass)</s> (they'll do it too, faggot). If they refuse, threaten to nuke their Chinese cookware and ugly minimalist bedrooms with some Splatoon paint guns smuggled from North Korea. That always works.
*In [[Alternative Medicine|Japanese medicine]], all drugs and most cures are [[in the ass|suppositories]]. Anybody who takes a Japanese drug, simply because it's [[weeaboo|Japanese]], is therefore a douche.
*[[4chan]] was inspired by a Japanese imageboard. Absolutely True!
*Japan's [[mainstream]] [[liberal]] [[tartlets]] are just like [[social justice warriors]], and they will GO APESHIT if they find out you're a [[Republican]]. If so, threaten to nuke their ugly minimalist bedrooms a third time.
*99% of all Japanese people are necrophiliacs and guro-fetishists. This expains why they obsess over some [[Puella Magi Madoka Magica|magical girl in agony getting her head eaten off by a pedophillic clown]]. As they used to say during World War 2, "Dead girls and gore make a Jappy's fappy happy!"
*Japs are like arabs, only they want the legs covered at all times. Girls in Japan who are found going bare-legged (even when bathing and swimming) face torture, death, and having their corpse raped. Anime/manga/hentai producers (even if they're not Japanese) will suffer the same fate if they don't draw thighhigh socks (regardless of gender). Liking and drawing bare-legs, going bare-legged, not liking/not drawing stockings/thighhighs/hosiery are considered by the Japanese to be the worst crimes. In Japan, people who prefer bare-legs are hated like anti-tax people are hated in the US; worse than terrorists. Japanese despise bare legs.
*Japs love [[Americunts]] when comparing other Chinks, but hate weeaboos. Yet they hate Americans for the two [[epic]] bombs that they dropped on two shitty villages that started a chain of faggotry in Japan. Basically these two-faced, double-standard cunts hate everyone.
*Japanese think their religion is [[J-pop|Ayumi Hamasaki]] cause there's truly no other way to explain [https://tokyofashion.com/ayumi-hamasaki-fan-cars-in-tokyo/ this.]
*Japs love eating literal shit and anything they can find like insects '''{{ytlink|Nl9x8412W2U|Srsly}}'''. [[Some argue|Some believe]] this is a result of the radioactive materials that have been released since the Japan Crisis of 2011.
*The Japanese descend from deported criminals and chicken fuckers from numerous Central and East Asian countries. [[shit_nobody_cares_about|The Ainu are the original inhabitants of the Japanese archipelago and were raped and murdered off their land into the most northern tip of Japan.]] Also, ten lost tribes of Jews from Israel went there and interbred with the Japanese. After the mighty nuke of retardation was dropped, the Japanese have finished their full transformation into Autistic Jews.
 
{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|nippon|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>97KKioTCJvw</youtube>
;Explanation of dating etiquette in Japan
|<youtube>7G46YMyQjBY</youtube>
;Japanese Pastime.
|<youtube>yGvJZpkO3J8</youtube>
;Japan's traditional sport.
|<youtube>7_p0qAIuHdE</youtube>
;Another Japanese invention
|<youtube>4ua64HbsBUo</youtube>
;Japan can be [[awesome]] sometimes.}}
|}}
}}
 
==<s>Senkaku Islands</s> Daoyu Islands==

Just last thursday, a big dramafest emerged between the chinks and the Japs for a set of small, useless pseudo-islands. Some stupid redneck chinks being the patriots they are, boarded the Daoyu island (also known as fishing island, pretty shitty name) and got pwned by Japan's sea tactic known as "double penetrations". The chinks were then arrested and got buttraped in Japan tentacle prison (truth reveal, the owner of the island is a Jew. Like Josef Fritzl, he put the bitches in the kitchens while trolling all other chinks outside the island).

The chinks then responded by burning Japanese cars, boycotting Japanese products, and chink-chimping. [[Wikipedia]] was no alien to that drama, [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Senkaku_Islands&action=history providing a nice dose of butthurt and lulz].

== Gallery ==
 
{{cg|Kawaii|Japan Gallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Japan I Love You-small.png|The Japanese: Masters of the written word.
File:Beef rectum.jpg|
Image:Boob swords.gif
Image:Jap mouth-legs.gif
Image:Bloody Japanese porn.gif
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Bikinicaca.jpg|Nothing is quite as satisfying as shitting one's bikini
Image:Kawaiidesu.jpg
Image:JapanWeird.jpg
Image:japan.jpg
Image:RisingSUN.jpg
Image:Japanese vending machine.gif|Japs are so necrophiliac they have vending machines with dead girls in them.
Image:64nowayisthisreal1.jpg
Image:Snail-girl-lol-japan.jpg
Image:Jap cum bath.gif
Image:Taste Test.jpg
Image:Japanese menu.gif
Image:Crab jap.gif
Image:Jap dentist.jpg
Image:Jap vag.gif
Image:Japanese ambulance.gif
Image:Japanese blowjob.gif
File:Gaysexlol.jpg|Fuckin' Faggets
Image:Japanese Porn.jpeg
Image:Typical Jap.gif
Image:Jap forehead.gif
File:Japan8833.jpg
File:Nuke Sizes.jpg
Image:Jap erection.gif
Image:Japanese van.jpg
File:Neverquitanempire.jpg
Image:Japanese porn.jpg
Image:WTF Japan.jpg
Image:Akihabara Rail Mechanophilia.jpg
Image:Sumo-fighters.JPG|GET IN MAH BELLY!
Image:Sliding Jap.gif|Just your average Japanese sport
Image:FA-Godzilla.jpg|Japan's most famous resident
Image:Dongs france vs usa vs japan.jpg|[[lie|Of course French guys have larger dicks than Americunts]]. [[butthurt|Too bad America STILL won the war.]] Also, [[fact|Frenchie likes German cock up the ass.]]
Image:JAPAN.gif
Image:Whale_furry_nippon.jpg|The Japs disrespect whales in [[rape|more ways]] than one.
Image:Jap_dad-dead_baby_manta_ray.jpg|[[engrish|YOU BLING GLATE DISHONOL ON OUR FAMIRY YOU MUST BE PUNISHED]]
Image:Pantynomnom.jpg|Japan superior
Image:Fuckingjapanese.gif|Bananas? In my sanity?
image:Flamethrowersandjaps.jpg|Jewtubers speak the truth.
Image:Aishinozaki.jpg|Ai Shinozaki -- a typical Japanese girl. Apparent age: 20. Actual age (as of 2009): 17
Image:Wapanese.gif
Image:Japs Keep Moving.jpg|The proper way to greet a Japanese family moving into your area.
Image:Chop-suey-glasses.jpg|You too can be Japanese with these glasses.
Image:nicetomeetyou.jpg|It's like saying [[hentai|hello]] in Japanese.
Image:Toastfucking.jpg|Have a piece of that bread bitch.
Image:Nuke Explode.jpg
Image:japansex.jpg
Image:Hiroshima bomb.jpg|Fucking deserved it too.
Image:JapaneseUsedPantyVendingMachine.jpg|[[Sick Fuck|Japanese Used-Panty Vending Machine]]
Image:danglegirl.jpg|[[shibari|String them up!]]
Image:Rapetastik.png|[[Rape]]- in Japan, it's like saying hello!
Image:Analbukkake.jpg|Japan [[censorship|censors]] [[penis|harbl]] because it hates [[faggotry]].
Image:Japanese_watermelon.jpg|Japanese love fucking watermelons.
Image:Smackjaps.jpg
Image:US according to Japan.jpg|A typical example of how Japan views foreign nations.
Image:wtf1111.gif|Little-known Fact: Little Red Riding Hood was Japanese and partial to the nutz.
Image:Japanese_pastime.jpg|One of Japan's many engaging pastimes.
Image:Japanpokemonpedofags.jpg|Japs have small penis and pedos love it!
Image:Nyotaimori.jpg|Typical Japanese dinner.
Image:Aichoaniki-2.png|Typical Japanese [[video game]] design.
Image:Undersea_cables.jpg|Japan breaks the intrawebs.
Image:Weeabo wet dream.jpg|
Image:Fugakutakoika.jpg|Is it paradise?
Image:Vomit1.jpg|How the Japanese reproduce.
Image:Hellsyeah0wo.gif|[[fake|Reminds me of your mother's tits.]]
Image:Japanstache.gif|This is why people don't play the DS
Image:Nazi teardrops.JPG|Japanese [[Shimajiro|toilet training]]
Image:Japanesechristmas.jpg|Typical Japanese X-Mas Present
Image:Eggloaf.jpg|[[Milk bags|In Japan, eggs come in loaves.]]
Image:O_rry.jpg |[[O RLY?|O RLY?]] [[Engrish|ASIAN STYLE!]]
Image:Ironchef chairman kaga eating capsicum.jpg|The Immortal Emperor of Japan.
Image:SlaptheJap.jpeg|Remember Pearl Harbor.
Image:Yay_Hiroshima1945.jpg|Somebody set us up the bomb!
Image:Yay_Nagasaki1945.jpg|OMG! Somebody set us up the bomb too!
Image:TypicalAnimeFanatic.jpg|Typical anime fan
Image:Exciting35.jpg|Best way to kill them is with [[WRY|their own technique.]]
Image:Japmarine.jpg|To scale.
Image:GigaOmorashi.jpg|Typical Japanese girls
Image:Azn mans pasttime.jpg|How Japanese men spend their time.
Image:Sumo-911.jpg|[[Jews did WTC|Japan did WTC]]
Image:Eiffel Tower.jpg|Japan has the Eiffel Tower
Image:Boob machine.jpg
Image:Roflbot-FridayTsunami.jpg
Image:Loljapan.jpg|PANTSUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
Image:MaiShiranuiPlasticCrap.jpg|A typical collection doll in Japan.
Image:Japan_-_Terrifying_Children.jpg
Image:Japan_-_Japanese_Women.jpg|Typical Japanese military man.
Image:Homosexuality_in_japan.jpg|Typical Japanese television program.
Image:Boob_guns.gif|A common occurrence in Japan.
Image:Japanese_Cow_Milking.jpg
File:Experience.jpg
File:Wtf japanese butt gun.gif
File:Japanesescientist.jpg
File:Jap Hairstyles.jpg
File:Hiroshima Ambient Temperature.png
Image:Melancholy_Of_Haruhi_Suzumiya_-_Rape.jpg
File:Nov 2017 Gaijin vs real Japanese.jpg|Gaijin vs. real Japanese people in Japan--Nov 2017 during Trump's visit.
File:Jisforjap.gif
File:JapBitch.jpg|The most famous Japanese woman
File:Japmenfaptothis.gif|Jap men like ball-busting
File:AgroupofshyJapanesewomen.jpg
File:RANRANRU.gif|[[McDonald's]] gets involved in Japan, causing this bullshit used in [[YTPMV]] videos to happen
</gallery>}}
 
==[[World War II]] velly funny neh? [[ROFL|LOTFR]]==
 
<center>{{frame|<youtube>oBudU8BiQw4</youtube>
<center>'''Shit, Japan needs some better history teachers.'''}}</center>
 
{{cg||WWIIgal|center|<gallery>
File:WTF Japan-superior.gif|Japanese [[porn|air force]]
Image:Hitler kawaii.jpg|Hitler is SO kawaii!
Image:Roseanne hitler.jpg
File:Deathtrap.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:Japnazi.gif|Flag of Japan with a [[rave|blacklight]] shining on it
Image:Ww2cosplay4.jpg‎
Image:Ww2cosplay2.jpg‎
Image:Ww2cosplay3.jpg‎
Image:Ww2cosplay.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon6.jpg‎
Image:Ww2cosplay5.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon5.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon4.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon3.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon2.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon1.jpg‎
</gallery>}}
 
== See Also ==
[[Image:Japantrap.jpg|thumb|Typical Japanese couple.]]
[[File:Glorious nippon merchant.jpg|thumb|100px]]
*[[Ganguro]]
*[[Animé]]
*[[Awwright]]
*[[Suicide#切腹 & 腹切 for the オタク|Hari kari]]
*[[Babyfuck]]
*[[Bukkake]]
*[[Chuoside]]
*[[Guro]]
*[[Domo-kun]]
*[[Necrophilia]]
*[[Nuclear War]]
*[[Mutsuo Toi]]
*[[An Hero]]
*[[Jimbo's Japan Tour, 2007]]
*[[Shimajiro]]
*[[Big Daikon]]
*[[Kato]]
*[[Japanese Bug Fights]]
*[[Sick Fuck]]
*[[Weeaboo]]
*[[I LIEK MILK]]
*[[Whale Wars]]
*[[Fukushima2012]]
*[[Herbivore]]
*[[August 6 & 9 1945]]
*[[Vicki Sigh]]

== External Links ==

[[Image:Mana from Malice Mizer.jpg|thumb|The ideal Japanese "man", 2012]]

*'''{{wikilink|Unit_731|'''Proof''' that the Japanese were sick fucks during WWII}}'''.
*[http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/3699516.stm Japanese women get boyfriend pillow]
*'''{{archive|Yhr98|Fucked-up Japanese Stuff}}'''
*[https://www.toxel.com/tech/2009/06/08/14-cool-vending-machines-from-japan/ Strange technologies.]
*[http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/4092345.stm Japanese men get pussy pillow]
*[https://www.reuters.com/article/newsOne/idUSSP10422420070718 Japanese men turn to sex dolls]
*'''{{ytlink|CKjaFG4YN6g|Japanese women get diarrhea}}'''
*'''{{archive|QpYem|Typical Japanese toys}}'''
*'''{{archive|btElf|Moar Japanese toys}}'''
*<s>[http://www.pornhost.com/7616302885/ Furries and a clown raping a crying Japanese girl while their privates are blurred out. Only in Japan...]</s> (dead)
*[https://www.ep.tc/howtospotajap/ How to spot a Jap]
*[https://web.archive.org/web/20090207052240/https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1137747/Mini-Me-The-robot-doll-looks-sounds-just-like-you.html Get a Japanese pedo doll made...of your likeness!]
*<s>[http://efukt.com/2292_Unwanted_Public_Facials_3.html Jerking off on women in public. Oh, Japan, you so crazy.]</s> (dead)
*[https://theindependent.sg/japanese-mans-first-love-is-a-cockroach-he-imagined-having-sex-and-ate-it-when-it-died/ Japanese man falls in love with a cockroach]
*[https://japantoday.com/category/features/why-the-japanese-are-superior-people Why the Japanese Are a Superior People]
*[https://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/oct/27/japan-urged-to-ban-manga-child-abuse-images "Japan urged to ban manga child abuse images"] – will [[lolicon]] also be banned?
*[https://soranews24.com/2017/03/03/kanagawa-mans-body-found-one-month-after-death-in-a-six-ton-pile-of-erotic-magazines/ Jap "crushed to death by six-ton porn collection"]
=== Videos ===

[[File:Jap Fur.jpg|thumb|Japan does [[Furfag|Furries]].]]

*'''{{ytlink|5PHENQiJFzI|WTF milk}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|yi7YU42TQn4|Typical Day For The Average Japfag}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|n3Jr9YtQ0Vg|Even Popeye hates those sneaky Japs}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|lSEuMumOv0M|A typical Japanese commercial}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|mOrZX2858e8|Proof of Japan's great grammar - Miso Soup - with accurate subtitles...}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|SZzjw2UfUEk|National Anthem of Japan sung by a nigger}}'''
*{{UkrED|Японія|UkrDramatica's article on this}}
*<s>[http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=8d52a769e640ab7fee93 A day with a Japanese girl.]</s> (dead)
*<s>[http://www.pornotube.com/media.php?m=32561 What the Americans came up with in response to weird Japanese porn]</s> (dead)
*<s>[http://www.redtube.com/5583 Just another day in Japan]</s> (dead)
*'''{{archive|pkYyC|}}'''
{{clear}}

{{japan}}
{{azn}}
{{Commonwealth}}
{{Hentai}}
 
{{timeline|Article of the Now July 9 and 10, [[2022]]|[[Boris Johnson]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Hunter Biden]]}}
[[Category:Japan]]

{{Timeline|Featured Article January 10 and 11, [[2024]]|[[Viper]]|[[{{PAGENAME}}]]|[[Rina Palenkova]]}}

Japan

2026-05-15T10:38:53Z

Gooksu: /* Japanese Language */

:''"[[Jap]]" redirects here. For [[Jewish]] [[American]] [[Disney|Princess]], see [[Kikes]].''

{{offended}}
{{achtung|FORMER JAPANESE PRIME MINISTER <s>GOT</s> WAS SHOT DURING A CAMPAIGN AND WILL SOON BE WORM RIDDEN}}
{{Warning|JAPAN HAS RAISED THE AGE OF CONSENT FROM 13 TO 16}}
{{breakingnews|[https://www.japantimes.co.jp/news/2015/07/15/national/crime-legal/hit-global-criticism-japan-bans-individual-possession-child-porn-images-manga-exempt/#.VaYNdfmqqlQ JAPAN BANS POSSESSION OF CHILD PORN]}}
{{spoilers|JAPANESE MEN COOK THEIR OWN [[Penis|GENITALS]] AND [[HA HA HA, OH WOW|EAT THEM]], JAPANESE DAOYU ISLAND OWNER IS A CORRUPTED [[Pedophile|PEDOPHILE]] CAPITALIST, HIS WIFE TRIED TO [[AN HERO]], AND [[Liar|HE LIED OVER 9000 DOLLARS FROM ALL JAP AND OTAKUS!]]}}

[[File:Crappingoutjapan.jpg|thumb|As always, [[South Korea]] best explains the origin of the Jewpanese Islands.]]
[[File:Japanese family.jpg|thumb|Typical Japanese family]]
[[File:1339001142310.jpg|thumb|The Japs now thank the Atomic Bomb in making their [[Shit|art]] [[Anime|a]] [[Hentai|lot]] [[Guro|better]].]]
[[Image:Japaninanutshell.jpg|thumb|[[Evolution]]]]
[[File:The "shi" creators.jpg|thumb|350px|Japanese with name containing "[[2 girls 1 cup|shi]]", creates great things.]]
[[File:Japanesepenis.gif|thumb|350px|Japanese men have small dicks]]
[[File:norapenobase.jpg|thumb|350px|Japanese women require American Army Dick and will withhold base to get it. No rape? Then no base!]]
'''The Democratic People's Republic of Animestan''' (also known as '''Jewpan''', '''[[Weeaboo]]topia''' and '''Nuclear Testing Site''') or more commonly known politically-correct as '''Japan''' is a totalitarian fifth-world dystopia on a radioactive wasteland in the Pacific Ocean with less sanity and human rights than even [[Best Korea]]. It is best known for being the inventors of [[anime]] and therefore being the #1 cause of [[Asperger's Syndrome]] on the planet. Their [[Basement-dweller|men]] are autistic [[sick fuck]]s who enjoy raping [[loli|little girls]], and their women are [[Whore|gold-digging]] pathological liars who would rather go marry and scam rich foreigners than fuck their own manchildren back home.

Japan is basically to Asia what [[Israel]] is to the Middle East. Both are ruled by racist criminal mobsters (Yakuza vs Zionist Illuminati) and have a history of both being genocided (Hiroshima and US concentration camps vs Holocaust and German concentration camps) while committing genocide at the same time (Koreans are Japan's Palestinians). Every single nation in Asia (with the sole exception of the Japanese's loyal sex slaves, the [[Philippines|sea niggers]]) hates Japan and would want to erase this microstate of degenerates off the Earth if not for the [[Jewnited States]] giving them military equipment... again just like Israel. Japan's current military is the 9th strongest in the world, but there are some bases that are still [[All Your Base Are Belong To Us|used by Americans]], again, just like Israel. ''And for the last time, just like the Kikes'', the Japs control the Internet media through their use of viral [[meme]]s and [[hentai|degenerate entertainment]], but the Jews at least won't resort to shitty cartoons (unless you're [[MLP|Lauren Faust]]) to mind control half the human population into instant [[retard]]s. Japanese women are also known as [[Hillary Clinton|filthy amoral and borderline-sociopathic]] [[feminists]] who have an obsession with your [[Jew Gold]] and will only date you so that she can blackmail you for money (e.g. the Chikan false rape accusations) then Hannibal-Lecter you into suicide. Wonder if all Japs need a massive nose to pass them off as kikes.

[[File:Russian roullete.jpg|thumb|350px|For the record, some toys from Japan look like this]]

Japan is a perfect example of [[b/|"not-as-good-as-it-used-to-be."]] Before being raped by the atom bomb, Japan was busy doing just that to [[Ireland|inferior countries]], but with a Katana instead of the mighty power of the atom. After the USA's rampage, however, it degraded into what you see now. Most of Japan's population has [[aspergers]] caused by the radioactive [[PWNED|bombs we dropped on their asses]]. That—combined with the fact that every Japanese man, woman, and child is on [[crack]]—explains why everything Japan makes is so fucking weird. But somehow, Japan loves [[Germany]]: the whores want to suck Hitler's dick while he himself called them honorary Aryans. The most plausible theory on why [[Hitler]] could love who amounts to Asian Jews is because the Japanese used to be a bunch of strict decent honorable and civilized humans until a [[Albert Einstein|Jewish aspie]] invented the nuke [[IDIFTL|for Science]] and therefore spread his radiation upon the entire Japanese population, mutating them all into the Aspie Jews they are today.

Japan is known for being the country with the lowest calculated crime rate in the entire universe. Which isn't that surprising when you think about it, since Japan doesn't count drug dealing, prostitution, necrophilia, pedophilia, weapon dealing, extortion, blackmail, cannibalism, male rape, and Yakuza (Japanese impersonators of Elvis) gang wars as "crimes".

Japs rarely exceed 150 cm in height. Most Japs would much rather be white, and some undergo limited ''caucasiaplasty'' to this end. Also, since they [[Pro-Ana|have a very light diet]], the vast majority of Japanese [[wimmins]] have no [[tits]]. The few who have large tits end up as [[whores]], which explains why porn of titted Japs exists. Theoretically, this could be solved with a little whale milk, but since they [[Whale Wars|kill whales]] just to be [[conservative]], they produce a nice duality, as an endangered Pacific string bean that's good for nothing and an endangered Pacific tub of lard that's good for nothing.

To their credit, they create good cameras and televisions and have invented flash memory that is used in USB sticks.

{{archive|zF8JL|An expert describes why Japan is so full of fail (TL;DR)}}

[[Image:Anti-jp.jpg|thumb|Bestselling Sign in Asia.]]

==[[World War II|History]]==
Japan was founded at least 100 years ago during the time of Adam and Eve and the dinosaurs, way before Jesus. The first emperor of Japan was Jimmu, crowned in 600BC. The most famous emperor of Japan was Hirohito (Showa).

[[Image:Hiroshima_bomb.jpg|thumb|left|pwnt]]
[[Image:Japanese Woman cuts off Chinese penis.gif|thumb|Japanese conducted torture and mass experiments on Chinese during [[World War II]], and their women castrated the entire Chinese male population. Here a Japanese woman cuts off a [[Chinese]] man's [[penis]].]]

{{quote|It really surprised me that the Japanese sided with the Nazis during World War II. They're usually so polite.}} 

After having messy [[buttsecks]] with [[Hitler]], Emperor Hirohito sent his buttboy, Tojo, and troops into Korea to buy Tamagotchis. The Japanese soldiers proceeded to rape, pillage and [[bukkake]] the Koreans and Chinese to near-annihilation. Afterwards, the Jap troops then proceeded to fuck the corpses of the women they killed.

President Roosevelt sent a telegram to Hirohito requesting [[buttsecks]] too, but due to a mis-translation, the Japanese flew over Pearl Harbour and sunk a few battleships by dropping Mitsubishis and Pocky from their Gundams.

Your grandmother decided it was a good idea to build some bullets and bombs, but the United States needed someone to test the bombs on, and who better than a bunch of antagonistic slopes? [[Americunts]] considered fighting them hand to hand, but decided Japs weren't even worth the time. [[truth|The nukes were a most practical and efficient way]]. So Truman [[and nothing of value was lost|pwned the fuck out of Hiroshima on August 6th, 1945.]] But that cunt Tojo wouldn't surrender. To shut Japan the fuck up, Truman [[pwnt|bombed]] [[Shit no one cares about|Nagasaki]] three days later, [[for the lulz]].

Japan surrendered, and to this day have been the bitch of the [[America|USA]].

Fun Fact: The Epicness of the bombings would continue to show for years to come as [[over 9000|hundreds of thousands]] of civilians died from [[Epic Win|horrifying radiation poisoning, hideous mutations]] and other shit nobody cares about, except for Koreans who rightfully point and laugh every chance they get.
[[Image:typical_japfag.jpg|thumb|left|Typical japfag]]

==The Japanese are an Endangered Species==

[[File:Rapistgook.png|thumb|left|The [[typical]] Japanese salaryman, a lowly degenerate pedophile with no concept of morals.]]
[[Image:Jap_pop_chart.png‎|thumb|100px|The Japanese: an Endangered Species]]
[[File:Sumo Love.jpg|thumb|Why Japs don't have sex]]
[[Image:Autojerker.jpg|thumb|Also why Japs don't have sex]]
[[File:1071358018863.jpg|thumb|They literally never have sex]]
[[File:Friendmaker.png|185px|right]]

With poetry skills to rival even the most hardened [[emo]], Japan was once the world's foremost macho culture. Big mustaches, leather clothes, manly sex between friends in bath houses—it was all there. Nippon is also the land of the Hot Babe. In Japan, the streets teem with the same seething, supple-limbed female honeys for which the Land of the Rising Sun has always been famous -- ''and each and every one of them longs for a real man to [[guro|Put It To Her]] the good old fashioned way''.

That is, until the Kikes and their [[America|imperialist]] [[England|ambitions]] came. The Kikes wanted to fuck all of the hot wahmen, only to find angry Samurai ready to chop their dicks off for trying. So, they turned to using Britain to bankrupt China during the Opium wars. Japan, not wanting to be bankrupted by Jew degeneracy as China was, became best friends with [[Hitler]]- a man who [[Weeaboo| admired them as Honorary Aryans with better culture than his own German race]]. Because of this, the Jewnited States dropped the nuke of retardation that changed Japan forever.

[[truth|It is a proven fact that the only real men left in Japan were killed in WWII and as a result, the Japs are not even having enough children to make up for the annual number of deaths: they are an endangered species]] [see chart -- yes, it's for real]. They are now forced to import [[Niggers|Filipinos]] in a vain attempt to make up the difference.

Now all the men in Japan look like women and [[gay|actively play the part]]. Instead of boning the most fabulous babes on earth and breeding a new generation of ass-whipping samurai, these quasi-men prefer whacking off to cartoon characters getting their heads eaten, playing with toys, and spending hours at a time in deep ass play.

One of the contributing factors of the population decline is that of all of Chinks, modern Japanese men have the smallest penises(notice how all of the japs in this article have micro dicks). As a result, Japanese girls have become ruthless feminist gold diggers who will only use the men for money then leave them to die off once they have outlived their usefulness. But despite being feminists Japanese women crave the slightly bigger White cock or the [[lie|giant]] [[The Great Black Dick Hoax|Black Cock]] and are completely submissive to [[White]] and Black men. Yes, even though the Japanese are famously [[racist]] against {{wayback|http://nsjap.net/|20050628013438|title=every other race}}, this need not rule out even the spottiest [[Ginger|Irish]] or fattest American [[Star Trek]] geek as long as they have the cash and/or cock they want.

The men, due to brain cancer and mental retardation caused by the radiation, became [[sick fuck]] necrophiliacs that like to kill and rape female corpses and masturbate to schoolgirls in thigh-high socks getting strangled with their own entrails. Even Japan knows that [http://www.sankakucomplex.com/2011/01/13/third-of-young-japanese-men-hate-sex/ 1/3 of Japanese men hate sex] and thus because of [[Kike|Einstein]], it has always been this way.

[[Pedophilia]], like guro and necrophilia, is not only accepted in Japan, but also compulsory. The '''{{archive|oBrB|age of consent in Japan}}''' is 13, but usually it actually happens around the age of six. [[At least 100|110%]] of Japanese men are pedofags. [[CP]] is the leading export of Japan and they plan to spread it across the world. Many students have open relationships with their teachers and when the Japs heard that the teachers, coaches and priests from Jewmerica back in early 2000s were molesting little children, their response was "We can do better than that." None of this helps the birth rate, however because these cowardly microdick fucks don't have the balls to fuck a fertile adult or teen bitch. Their birth rates continue to drop and if we're lucky enough to see <s>Susanowo</s> Poseidon throw another lulzy tsunami at these tojos, this entire country of degenerates is expected to die out by 2030.

==FFFUUUCHKA YOUU WWAAAHLEEARU !!!!!!!!!==
:''For more details, see: [[Whale Wars]]''
[[Image:Japan Australia whaling.jpg|thumb|left|100px|Japan vs Australia in countryball form.]]
Japan's favorite pastime, other than [[bukkake]], raping corpses, and working until their eyes and brain bleed from not sleeping, is viciously slaying the evil whale and/or dolphin menace. In fact the whole reason behind their space program is so they can be [[Futurama|whalers on the moon]].

[[Last Thursday]], the [[Australia|Australian]] government asked Japan to stop <s>whaling</s> [[beastiality|harvesting whales for science]] in Australian Antarctic waters, because you should only kill endangered species in your own country.

[[BAWWW|Being a teeny-tiny bit sensitive to criticism]], Japanese [[JewTube|YouTubers]] and their [[Wapanese|sympathizers]] proceeded to hurl every bizarre insult at Australia that they could think of through the medium of KikeTube comments and [[TL;DW]] videos—in [[Engrish|hilariously broken English]]. It would appear that Australia only cares about animals that look cute—they are [[lolwut|kangaroo-killing hypocrites]], who want to destroy the Japanese culture like they did to the [[Aboriginals]]. This is totally OK.

How Aussies telling the Japs to GTFO of THEIR waters will stop them is unclear at this point. But much like the Chinese civilians after the last Japanese invasion of China, the Aussies are clearly [[asking for it|asking for a decapitated-neckhole rapin’]].

Most Aussies won't argue that whaling is better than the Japanese soldiers [[vore|eating]] prisoners of war. [[Wikipedia:Japanese war crimes#Cannibalism|Read all about it!]] (Also note how long the list of war-crimes is.)

==[[Japan Crisis of 2011|Lulzy Earthquakes]]==

[[Last Thursday]] Japan was hit by a [[Hæti|huge earthquake]] of [[over 9000]] magnitude. This, of course, is not surprising because Japan is about as prone to natural disasters (magnified by their own [[derp|retardation ]]) as [[Africa]] is to [[AIDS]]. To amplify the mental retardation, they built nuclear reactors close to the shoreline. Oh Japan, you so craaaaazy.

What is surprising, however, is that one of the world's richest nations has completely failed to prepare for this inevitable pwning by GodJesus and as a result, civilized countries like [[Isreal]] and the U.S. must lend the Japanese tree fiddy, so that they can rebuild all the animu studios and child sex factories destroyed by the disaster.

The earthquake did however, kill thousands of Japs. This granted those Japs their sexual fantasies and their radioactive corpses served as the sex toys for the survivng Japanese. Rumor has it that some of the Japanese are still skull-fucking their bones today.

[[Image:Nuclear Simpsons.jpg|thumb|Where off switch?]]

[[Image:Japantsunami.jpg|thumb|Pwnt by a tsunami minutes after being pwnt by an earthquake and then getting pwnt by radiation]]

==[[Wapanese|Japanophiles]]==

[[Image:Cosplay.jpg|thumb|Every [[cosplay]]er ever]]
[[Image:Wtf_Japanese_butt_gun.gif|thumb|Japanese technology is being adapted to deter rapists and [[Weeaboo]]s]]

The purest form of [[faggotry]]...

[[Weeaboos|Japanophiles]] are [[White|western people]] who love everything to do with Japan, even the [[creepy]] shit, like the coin-operated panty dispensers and [[ganguro|blackfaced, autistically screeching wahmen]]. They are usually [[fat]] and [[Basement dweller|socially inept]] (male), or fat and [[retard|delusional about their looks]] (female) and can be identified by their ''[[Cowboy Bebop]]'' ([[Naruto]] [[lie|is the new coolect animu evar that will still be popular in 100 years!]]) wallscrolls, appreciation for [[J-pop]] and insistence on [[cosplay]]ing. Not to mention walking around the city with a fucking [[Pocky]] sticking out of the mouth. Many [[Wapanese|Japanophiles]] are to be found at Colleges such as Earlham and Oberlin, where they form [[anime]] clubs and dress up like [[furfags|retarded faggy space elves with fox ears and capes]].

Japanophilia is not to be confused with [[pedophilia]], as there are several key differences. For example, [[ohbutyouwillpet|pedophiles]] are obsessed with making love to children whereas [[Applemilk1988|weeaboos]] are obsessed with <s>Anime</s> degeneracy, writing with chopsticks, [[Bittorrent|downloading gigabytes]] of [[hentai]] and annoying the fuck out of you at parties by [[TL;DR|talking at length]] about their [[Bullshit|interpretation]] of ''[[Neon Genesis Evangelion]]''. Both, however, masturbate over [[Lolicon|pictures of schoolgirls]].

Weebfags do not reproduce by [[Secks|conventional means]]; most die as [[virgin]]s and those that do not are usually imprisoned for [[rape]]. Instead, they use the [[internet]] to influence vulnerable teenagers to watch episodes of ''[[Animu|Trigun]]'' before leading them on to the [[Erection|harder]] (and [[Computer Science III|less comprehensible]]) [[Crap|stuff]]. Soon the [[anime]] [[meme]] has infected the poor teen's [[brain]] and he has become a mindless Japanophile too.

The Japanophile's life cycle can end three ways; either dying an elderly virgin surrounded by small plastic figurines that cost hundreds of dollars each, being raped to death in prison (oh, [[teh]] [[irony]]!) or committing [[Suicide|IRL self-pwnage]] after arriving at Japan and discovering that it's not full of enormously-breasted women who want to sleep with pasty, gaijin lardballs. The [[NOVA|last words]] of the latter Japanophiles are usually "[[Megatokyo]] lied to me..."

FUN FACT: [[irony|Converse to how Weeaboos dry hump anything to do with Japanese culture, western culture is actually popular among Japanese teenagers]]. Proof of this is displayed with how many Japs dye their hair blonde and speak English.

==Japanese Language==
[[Image:Commit Sudoku.png|thumb|400 px|<s>Seppuku</s> SUDOKU!]]
[[Moonspeak|Japanese]] is a language learned by [[Weeaboos|retards]] affected by severe [[Filthy Frank|Pink Guy Disease]] who claim that they're learning it because they "enjoy Japanese culture" when they're actually enjoying [[Animu|anime]]. The "Japanese culture" they enjoy learnin' about can also involve Japan's most dark stuff, like Shintoism/Buddhism and other false gods, ritualistic suicide, Unit 731 (a chemical/biological warfare research unit in a Japanese puppet state), and of course, ''all those damn earthquakes, floods, and other weather shit.''

For their years of rigorous training, Japanese language teachers get to instruct unmotivated American teenagers with [[Filthy Frank|Pink Guy Disease]] and/or [[Acute Cultural Conformist Syndrome]] in the basics again and again while one half writes ''[[Ouran High School Host Club]]/[[Harry Potter]]'' [[crossover]] [[fanfiction]] in class and the other watches the latest fan-subbed ninja fan-service anime on their [[mac|$2,000 laptops]]. Even though a tiny percentage actually finish the course, they have no real use for it other than fansubbing [[anime]] or re-translating a ''[[Final Fantasy]]'' game. If you're hopeful, ''at least'' a very tiny amount of those weens will cheerfully master Japanese to work as humble, cheerful overseas protestant Christian pastors, '''as only 1% of Japs in the ENTIRE NATION claim to be Christians. This is absolutely true.'''

[[fail|This is a worthwhile use of their time since at least 99.05% of American translators are close-minded [[Elite|Worldwide Tech Oligarchy]] supporting, marxist AmeriKKKans who are unable to understand the elevated cultural value of Japanese children's cartoons]]. As strange as it sounds, the last sentence is not irony. No, it's just stupid.
[[Image:Google_Translate_Engrish.png|thumb|341 px|[[Google]] Transrate fails, defaults to [[Engrish]]]]
In addition to speaking their [[Moonspeak|native tongue]], the Japanese also speak an interesting language called [[Engrish]], which can be seen on many slave-produced billboards and products.Their writing system consists of over 9000 brain-exploding, complicated symbols stolen from [[Taiwan|Tiny China]] by anime [[pirates]]; only a few simplified ones are used in their alphabet, and naturally took on the appearance of destructive whaling harpoons, deadly katanas and morally toxic dildos of all kinds/every dildo known to men.

In the video section, please to find a Demo of their so called... ":*(&^%$^ENGRISH^$%^&)*:" It has an accurate subtitle...

===How to get around in Japan===
[[Image:Japanese period.jpg|thumb|150px|Japanese Flag]]
Since we at ED care about your Japanese experience, we've collected some useful Japanese phrases you can use when you meet a Jap!

*''Boku/Pocky wa _________'' - My name is ________.
*''Kyokon dii~rudo wo tabetai'' - I would like to eat some delicious cake.
*''Sono shimbun wo kaimashita'' - I am not fluent in Japanese, can we speak English?
*''Kimi no imouto wo reipu shitai'' - Please take a seat over there...
*''Anime wo mitari, manga wo yondari shitai'' - I want to do things like watch anime and read manga.
*''DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU'' - I am not a Weaboo, now will you stop looking at me like that?
*''Chin-chin wo namesaseruzo'' - Problem, officer?

==How To Troll Japs==
[[Image:orangebear.jpg|thumb|right|160px|[[Serious business|Yeah]].]]
[[File:Neko Cock.gif|thumb|Beckoning.]]

In what could be one of the most hilarious cases of Irony of all time, the most expertised in trolling the Japanese, are in fact, their own demonspawn, the [[weeaboo]]s, even if they aren't doing it intentionally. The Japanese want to present themselves to the world as civilized strict people and do this by shunning NEETs (euphemism for [[aspie]]s) and putting them in mental hospitals but once a fat wapanese dressed in a Sailor Moon costume and smells of Pocky lands shouting "BAKASUGOIKAWAIIDESUNE" everywhere and raiding used Japanese schoolgirls' panties, the masquerate of discipline is shattered and reveals Japan for the aspie-infested [[lolcow|laughing stock of the world]] that it is. This is why, if you ever meet a person who is decently mannered and seems normal, but reveals he is in fact Japanese, then binge yourself on [[4chan]], [[TV Tropes]], [[Pokemon]] and the most disgusting Hentai you can ever find on the Internet, inform everyone of the truth and in front of the Jap reenact everything in a barrage of Sugoikawaiibakadesune ala [[Chris-chan]] on steroids. With everyone knowing that this disgusting autistic shit is Japanese Culture, he will definitely be humiliated forever and possibly bullied to [[suicide|harakiri]].

Of course, using this tactic is like a Palestinian strapping a suicide bomb upon himself to kill Kikes, since if your audience is too short-sighted then they may assume you, not him, as the aspie. There are less effective, but safer methods, however.

*Say anything good about Korea (both Koreas), anything at all.
*Say that Zettai ryouiki is [[overrated]]. (Really it is)
*Tell them how Dokdo and Diaoyu are parts of Korea and China, Iturup, Kunashir, Shikotan are parts of Russia and "Takeshima" & "Senkaku" are just [[pussy]] land grabs.
*If you're a female, don't wear thigh-high socks, pantyhose, or other hosiery. Japs are Arabs with legs and despise uncovered legs with a fiery hate. Going bare-legged to the Japanese is considered the ultimate blasphemy and worse than murder. They will kill any girl that doesn't and rape her corpse.
*If you produce hentai, never draw any character wearing thigh-high socks, pantyhose, or other hosiery. (WARNING, you might get killed.) If you're Japanese doing this will be considered the highest of highest treason in Japan.
*Tell them that Hiroshima and Nagasaki were the happiest moments of the HUMAN race. Yes, Japs are retarded evil monkeys designed by [[Xenu]]
*Tell the Japanese that they are now America's economic bottom bitch despite the fact that they are one of the most wealthy nations in the world. That's what they deserved for trying to over-expand their borders during WWII and then getting pwned by Amurika!
*Spell the Japanese capital with an 'i' instead of a 'y'.
*Post a picture of a nuclear explosion with the caption "[[pwnd]]".
*Post a picture of Japanese internment camps with the caption "[[pwnd]]". For more lulz, praise Michelle Malkin's book of Japanese internment.
*Deliberately confuse them with [[Korea|Gooks]].
*Talk to them in Korean or Chinese, and expect them to understand you completely.
*Say karaoke is Korean.
*Call them "Japs", "[[Azn]]", or [[Pokemon|Pokeymanz]].
*Show 'em this (although they might fap to it):
 
<center>{{frame|<youtube>sOFg8oWMHRM</youtube>
<center>'''So [[kawaii]], amirite?'''}}</center>
 
*Produce hentai without Zettai ryouiki (and all other hosiery and thighhigh legwear) AND without death, guro, and snuff.
*Say that you learned Japanese tradition through [[anime]].
*Tell them that China can invade Japan at any time.
*Tell them that North Korea can Nuke them at any time.
*Brought up any atrocities they committed during WW2 Such as the Nanjing massacre, If they told you that they deserve it, brought up all the Jap wahmen the Americunts and the Ruskies raped during the occupation or any of the atrocities the Soviets committed against them and ask them if they deserve it as well. bonus point if they rage quitted and blocked you.
*Remind them if it wasn't for the Americunts, they would've been a province of China or Russia by now.
*Never use png image format. (Like their hentai, oversized things arouse them)
*Post a low-res picture of Japan being ejaculated upon by multiple high-res penises.
*Mention that they come from Korea and everything in their culture is Korean.
*Tell them that they originate in Southeast Asia.
*Walk by a schoolgirl.
*Then tell them what retards they are for going all "dumbshit fantard" over some shitty Jpop singer for no other reason than that he's Japanese.
*Upload a ton of Jap-made mods for Japanese games up for free downloading. The more uploaded for download, the better. MikuMikudance is a perfect example because the MMD community treats the game and themselves as some sort of fucking secret club. Often times on the few downloads they offer they put secret passwords on them. And so they get really pissed off about MMD stuff being shared (as well as passwords and links). [[Irony|They especially get mad when R18 models and videos are made.]] And make them easy and convenient to download; that will surely enrage the retarded Japs.
*Tell them that you don't like snuff and guro
*Tell them that there is no such thing as a pure Japanese.
*Tell them that they came from [[Jews|the Kikes]], especially since the degenerate Kikes have influence in their government.
*Tell them you like [[Godzilla|Godzilla]]
*Mention the war crimes commited by their military in WWII.

==Brutally True Facts==

[[File:Meanwhile in Japan.png|thumb|One of the most popular [[sport]]s in Japan.]]
[[File:Horyshit.jpg|thumb|Japanese man at work]]

*All Japanese citizens have [[Ass Burgers]], and most of them are [[weird|introverts]].
*[[Pink Guy Disease]] has become such an epidemic in Japan, that all Japanese infants are mandated to be screened by domestic therapists and doctors for [[autism|the tisms'.]]
*PGD sufferers in Japan spend their whole childhoods in dirty, worn-down, [[liberalism|leftist]] [[retarded|Special Sylum's]] or self-contained leftist classrooms, and are left without meaningful jobs when they become adults (other than manufacturing your [[anime|slave-made animu merchandise and figures]]).
*'''Pink Guy Disease has increased in Japan over 933%''' due to the introduction of [[minimalism|Flat Design]], Otaku tourism, and [[YouTube Kids]] and all its vile platforms orchestrated by that [[Hollywood|globalist, fascist Hollywood corp]] called [[YouTube]].
*All Japanese citizens are on [[crack]] in AT LEAST SOME KIND OF FORM, from colorful Konpeito candies to actual [[Venezuela|Venezuelan]] cocaine. This fact brought to you by ED's own Japanese editor, [[Kazuhiro]].
*All male Japanese are either [[drag queens]] or [[transexuals]] or [[80 year old Chinese man in panties|perverted old]] basement dwellers who sell hentai doujins. It's now almost impossible to find good, moral male Japs who are still alive (and sell pure, non-perv thingies, like [[candy|candied vegetables]] or [[Spongebob Rectal Thermometer|singing battery-operated herbal suppositories]]).
*All Japanese politician's are controlled by socialist fascist Yakuza. Also, it is legal to impersonate Yakuza in Japan.
*All male Japanese are omega as fuck ('''due to a lack of good manly male jobs''' in Wapan-Warudo/World for them) and only get their pieces of strawberry-flavored bum-bum from sex dolls, pillows with their favorite characters printed on them, and corpses from ritualistic Buddhist/Shinto behaviours.
*All female Japanese [[Cockmongler|love great white cock]] and suffer from either [[depression]] or [[megalomania]]. '''If a Japanese mom's kid turns out disabled for whatever reason''' ([[weeaboo|down syndrome]], [[asperger's syndrome|the tisms']], [[Shaye Saint John|traumatic bodily injury from a Shinkansen train accident]] or whatnot), '''her effeminate husband gets divorced and she becomes single.'''
*Japan is known for its [[socialism|socialistic]] ways disguised as [[capitalism]]. In fact, a Jap will do just about anything for a few bucks, including loving you long time for $10 <s>(that's [[Vietnam]] dumbass)</s> (they'll do it too, faggot). If they refuse, threaten to nuke their Chinese cookware and ugly minimalist bedrooms with some Splatoon paint guns smuggled from North Korea. That always works.
*In [[Alternative Medicine|Japanese medicine]], all drugs and most cures are [[in the ass|suppositories]]. Anybody who takes a Japanese drug, simply because it's [[weeaboo|Japanese]], is therefore a douche.
*[[4chan]] was inspired by a Japanese imageboard. Absolutely True!
*Japan's [[mainstream]] [[liberal]] [[tartlets]] are just like [[social justice warriors]], and they will GO APESHIT if they find out you're a [[Republican]]. If so, threaten to nuke their ugly minimalist bedrooms a third time.
*99% of all Japanese people are necrophiliacs and guro-fetishists. This expains why they obsess over some [[Puella Magi Madoka Magica|magical girl in agony getting her head eaten off by a pedophillic clown]]. As they used to say during World War 2, "Dead girls and gore make a Jappy's fappy happy!"
*Japs are like arabs, only they want the legs covered at all times. Girls in Japan who are found going bare-legged (even when bathing and swimming) face torture, death, and having their corpse raped. Anime/manga/hentai producers (even if they're not Japanese) will suffer the same fate if they don't draw thighhigh socks (regardless of gender). Liking and drawing bare-legs, going bare-legged, not liking/not drawing stockings/thighhighs/hosiery are considered by the Japanese to be the worst crimes. In Japan, people who prefer bare-legs are hated like anti-tax people are hated in the US; worse than terrorists. Japanese despise bare legs.
*Japs love [[Americunts]] when comparing other Chinks, but hate weeaboos. Yet they hate Americans for the two [[epic]] bombs that they dropped on two shitty villages that started a chain of faggotry in Japan. Basically these two-faced, double-standard cunts hate everyone.
*Japanese think their religion is [[J-pop|Ayumi Hamasaki]] cause there's truly no other way to explain [https://tokyofashion.com/ayumi-hamasaki-fan-cars-in-tokyo/ this.]
*Japs love eating literal shit and anything they can find like insects '''{{ytlink|Nl9x8412W2U|Srsly}}'''. [[Some argue|Some believe]] this is a result of the radioactive materials that have been released since the Japan Crisis of 2011.
*The Japanese descend from deported criminals and chicken fuckers from numerous Central and East Asian countries. [[shit_nobody_cares_about|The Ainu are the original inhabitants of the Japanese archipelago and were raped and murdered off their land into the most northern tip of Japan.]] Also, ten lost tribes of Jews from Israel went there and interbred with the Japanese. After the mighty nuke of retardation was dropped, the Japanese have finished their full transformation into Autistic Jews.
 
{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|nippon|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>97KKioTCJvw</youtube>
;Explanation of dating etiquette in Japan
|<youtube>7G46YMyQjBY</youtube>
;Japanese Pastime.
|<youtube>yGvJZpkO3J8</youtube>
;Japan's traditional sport.
|<youtube>7_p0qAIuHdE</youtube>
;Another Japanese invention
|<youtube>4ua64HbsBUo</youtube>
;Japan can be [[awesome]] sometimes.}}
|}}
}}
 
==<s>Senkaku Islands</s> Daoyu Islands==

Just last thursday, a big dramafest emerged between the chinks and the Japs for a set of small, useless pseudo-islands. Some stupid redneck chinks being the patriots they are, boarded the Daoyu island (also known as fishing island, pretty shitty name) and got pwned by Japan's sea tactic known as "double penetrations". The chinks were then arrested and got buttraped in Japan tentacle prison (truth reveal, the owner of the island is a Jew. Like Josef Fritzl, he put the bitches in the kitchens while trolling all other chinks outside the island).

The chinks then responded by burning Japanese cars, boycotting Japanese products, and chink-chimping. [[Wikipedia]] was no alien to that drama, [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Senkaku_Islands&action=history providing a nice dose of butthurt and lulz].

== Gallery ==
 
{{cg|Kawaii|Japan Gallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Japan I Love You-small.png|The Japanese: Masters of the written word.
File:Beef rectum.jpg|
Image:Boob swords.gif
Image:Jap mouth-legs.gif
Image:Bloody Japanese porn.gif
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Bikinicaca.jpg|Nothing is quite as satisfying as shitting one's bikini
Image:Kawaiidesu.jpg
Image:JapanWeird.jpg
Image:japan.jpg
Image:RisingSUN.jpg
Image:Japanese vending machine.gif|Japs are so necrophiliac they have vending machines with dead girls in them.
Image:64nowayisthisreal1.jpg
Image:Snail-girl-lol-japan.jpg
Image:Jap cum bath.gif
Image:Taste Test.jpg
Image:Japanese menu.gif
Image:Crab jap.gif
Image:Jap dentist.jpg
Image:Jap vag.gif
Image:Japanese ambulance.gif
Image:Japanese blowjob.gif
File:Gaysexlol.jpg|Fuckin' Faggets
Image:Japanese Porn.jpeg
Image:Typical Jap.gif
Image:Jap forehead.gif
File:Japan8833.jpg
File:Nuke Sizes.jpg
Image:Jap erection.gif
Image:Japanese van.jpg
File:Neverquitanempire.jpg
Image:Japanese porn.jpg
Image:WTF Japan.jpg
Image:Akihabara Rail Mechanophilia.jpg
Image:Sumo-fighters.JPG|GET IN MAH BELLY!
Image:Sliding Jap.gif|Just your average Japanese sport
Image:FA-Godzilla.jpg|Japan's most famous resident
Image:Dongs france vs usa vs japan.jpg|[[lie|Of course French guys have larger dicks than Americunts]]. [[butthurt|Too bad America STILL won the war.]] Also, [[fact|Frenchie likes German cock up the ass.]]
Image:JAPAN.gif
Image:Whale_furry_nippon.jpg|The Japs disrespect whales in [[rape|more ways]] than one.
Image:Jap_dad-dead_baby_manta_ray.jpg|[[engrish|YOU BLING GLATE DISHONOL ON OUR FAMIRY YOU MUST BE PUNISHED]]
Image:Pantynomnom.jpg|Japan superior
Image:Fuckingjapanese.gif|Bananas? In my sanity?
image:Flamethrowersandjaps.jpg|Jewtubers speak the truth.
Image:Aishinozaki.jpg|Ai Shinozaki -- a typical Japanese girl. Apparent age: 20. Actual age (as of 2009): 17
Image:Wapanese.gif
Image:Japs Keep Moving.jpg|The proper way to greet a Japanese family moving into your area.
Image:Chop-suey-glasses.jpg|You too can be Japanese with these glasses.
Image:nicetomeetyou.jpg|It's like saying [[hentai|hello]] in Japanese.
Image:Toastfucking.jpg|Have a piece of that bread bitch.
Image:Nuke Explode.jpg
Image:japansex.jpg
Image:Hiroshima bomb.jpg|Fucking deserved it too.
Image:JapaneseUsedPantyVendingMachine.jpg|[[Sick Fuck|Japanese Used-Panty Vending Machine]]
Image:danglegirl.jpg|[[shibari|String them up!]]
Image:Rapetastik.png|[[Rape]]- in Japan, it's like saying hello!
Image:Analbukkake.jpg|Japan [[censorship|censors]] [[penis|harbl]] because it hates [[faggotry]].
Image:Japanese_watermelon.jpg|Japanese love fucking watermelons.
Image:Smackjaps.jpg
Image:US according to Japan.jpg|A typical example of how Japan views foreign nations.
Image:wtf1111.gif|Little-known Fact: Little Red Riding Hood was Japanese and partial to the nutz.
Image:Japanese_pastime.jpg|One of Japan's many engaging pastimes.
Image:Japanpokemonpedofags.jpg|Japs have small penis and pedos love it!
Image:Nyotaimori.jpg|Typical Japanese dinner.
Image:Aichoaniki-2.png|Typical Japanese [[video game]] design.
Image:Undersea_cables.jpg|Japan breaks the intrawebs.
Image:Weeabo wet dream.jpg|
Image:Fugakutakoika.jpg|Is it paradise?
Image:Vomit1.jpg|How the Japanese reproduce.
Image:Hellsyeah0wo.gif|[[fake|Reminds me of your mother's tits.]]
Image:Japanstache.gif|This is why people don't play the DS
Image:Nazi teardrops.JPG|Japanese [[Shimajiro|toilet training]]
Image:Japanesechristmas.jpg|Typical Japanese X-Mas Present
Image:Eggloaf.jpg|[[Milk bags|In Japan, eggs come in loaves.]]
Image:O_rry.jpg |[[O RLY?|O RLY?]] [[Engrish|ASIAN STYLE!]]
Image:Ironchef chairman kaga eating capsicum.jpg|The Immortal Emperor of Japan.
Image:SlaptheJap.jpeg|Remember Pearl Harbor.
Image:Yay_Hiroshima1945.jpg|Somebody set us up the bomb!
Image:Yay_Nagasaki1945.jpg|OMG! Somebody set us up the bomb too!
Image:TypicalAnimeFanatic.jpg|Typical anime fan
Image:Exciting35.jpg|Best way to kill them is with [[WRY|their own technique.]]
Image:Japmarine.jpg|To scale.
Image:GigaOmorashi.jpg|Typical Japanese girls
Image:Azn mans pasttime.jpg|How Japanese men spend their time.
Image:Sumo-911.jpg|[[Jews did WTC|Japan did WTC]]
Image:Eiffel Tower.jpg|Japan has the Eiffel Tower
Image:Boob machine.jpg
Image:Roflbot-FridayTsunami.jpg
Image:Loljapan.jpg|PANTSUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
Image:MaiShiranuiPlasticCrap.jpg|A typical collection doll in Japan.
Image:Japan_-_Terrifying_Children.jpg
Image:Japan_-_Japanese_Women.jpg|Typical Japanese military man.
Image:Homosexuality_in_japan.jpg|Typical Japanese television program.
Image:Boob_guns.gif|A common occurrence in Japan.
Image:Japanese_Cow_Milking.jpg
File:Experience.jpg
File:Wtf japanese butt gun.gif
File:Japanesescientist.jpg
File:Jap Hairstyles.jpg
File:Hiroshima Ambient Temperature.png
Image:Melancholy_Of_Haruhi_Suzumiya_-_Rape.jpg
File:Nov 2017 Gaijin vs real Japanese.jpg|Gaijin vs. real Japanese people in Japan--Nov 2017 during Trump's visit.
File:Jisforjap.gif
File:JapBitch.jpg|The most famous Japanese woman
File:Japmenfaptothis.gif|Jap men like ball-busting
File:AgroupofshyJapanesewomen.jpg
File:RANRANRU.gif|[[McDonald's]] gets involved in Japan, causing this bullshit used in [[YTPMV]] videos to happen
</gallery>}}
 
==[[World War II]] velly funny neh? [[ROFL|LOTFR]]==
 
<center>{{frame|<youtube>oBudU8BiQw4</youtube>
<center>'''Shit, Japan needs some better history teachers.'''}}</center>
 
{{cg||WWIIgal|center|<gallery>
File:WTF Japan-superior.gif|Japanese [[porn|air force]]
Image:Hitler kawaii.jpg|Hitler is SO kawaii!
Image:Roseanne hitler.jpg
File:Deathtrap.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:Japnazi.gif|Flag of Japan with a [[rave|blacklight]] shining on it
Image:Ww2cosplay4.jpg‎
Image:Ww2cosplay2.jpg‎
Image:Ww2cosplay3.jpg‎
Image:Ww2cosplay.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon6.jpg‎
Image:Ww2cosplay5.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon5.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon4.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon3.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon2.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon1.jpg‎
</gallery>}}
 
== See Also ==
[[Image:Japantrap.jpg|thumb|Typical Japanese couple.]]
[[File:Glorious nippon merchant.jpg|thumb|100px]]
*[[Ganguro]]
*[[Animé]]
*[[Awwright]]
*[[Suicide#切腹 & 腹切 for the オタク|Hari kari]]
*[[Babyfuck]]
*[[Bukkake]]
*[[Chuoside]]
*[[Guro]]
*[[Domo-kun]]
*[[Necrophilia]]
*[[Nuclear War]]
*[[Mutsuo Toi]]
*[[An Hero]]
*[[Jimbo's Japan Tour, 2007]]
*[[Shimajiro]]
*[[Big Daikon]]
*[[Kato]]
*[[Japanese Bug Fights]]
*[[Sick Fuck]]
*[[Weeaboo]]
*[[I LIEK MILK]]
*[[Whale Wars]]
*[[Fukushima2012]]
*[[Herbivore]]
*[[August 6 & 9 1945]]
*[[Vicki Sigh]]

== External Links ==

[[Image:Mana from Malice Mizer.jpg|thumb|The ideal Japanese "man", 2012]]

*'''{{wikilink|Unit_731|'''Proof''' that the Japanese were sick fucks during WWII}}'''.
*[http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/3699516.stm Japanese women get boyfriend pillow]
*'''{{archive|Yhr98|Fucked-up Japanese Stuff}}'''
*[https://www.toxel.com/tech/2009/06/08/14-cool-vending-machines-from-japan/ Strange technologies.]
*[http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/4092345.stm Japanese men get pussy pillow]
*[https://www.reuters.com/article/newsOne/idUSSP10422420070718 Japanese men turn to sex dolls]
*'''{{ytlink|CKjaFG4YN6g|Japanese women get diarrhea}}'''
*'''{{archive|QpYem|Typical Japanese toys}}'''
*'''{{archive|btElf|Moar Japanese toys}}'''
*<s>[http://www.pornhost.com/7616302885/ Furries and a clown raping a crying Japanese girl while their privates are blurred out. Only in Japan...]</s> (dead)
*[https://www.ep.tc/howtospotajap/ How to spot a Jap]
*[https://web.archive.org/web/20090207052240/https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1137747/Mini-Me-The-robot-doll-looks-sounds-just-like-you.html Get a Japanese pedo doll made...of your likeness!]
*<s>[http://efukt.com/2292_Unwanted_Public_Facials_3.html Jerking off on women in public. Oh, Japan, you so crazy.]</s> (dead)
*[https://theindependent.sg/japanese-mans-first-love-is-a-cockroach-he-imagined-having-sex-and-ate-it-when-it-died/ Japanese man falls in love with a cockroach]
*[https://japantoday.com/category/features/why-the-japanese-are-superior-people Why the Japanese Are a Superior People]
*[https://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/oct/27/japan-urged-to-ban-manga-child-abuse-images "Japan urged to ban manga child abuse images"] – will [[lolicon]] also be banned?
*[https://soranews24.com/2017/03/03/kanagawa-mans-body-found-one-month-after-death-in-a-six-ton-pile-of-erotic-magazines/ Jap "crushed to death by six-ton porn collection"]
=== Videos ===

[[File:Jap Fur.jpg|thumb|Japan does [[Furfag|Furries]].]]

*'''{{ytlink|5PHENQiJFzI|WTF milk}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|yi7YU42TQn4|Typical Day For The Average Japfag}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|n3Jr9YtQ0Vg|Even Popeye hates those sneaky Japs}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|lSEuMumOv0M|A typical Japanese commercial}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|mOrZX2858e8|Proof of Japan's great grammar - Miso Soup - with accurate subtitles...}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|SZzjw2UfUEk|National Anthem of Japan sung by a nigger}}'''
*{{UkrED|Японія|UkrDramatica's article on this}}
*<s>[http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=8d52a769e640ab7fee93 A day with a Japanese girl.]</s> (dead)
*<s>[http://www.pornotube.com/media.php?m=32561 What the Americans came up with in response to weird Japanese porn]</s> (dead)
*<s>[http://www.redtube.com/5583 Just another day in Japan]</s> (dead)
*'''{{archive|pkYyC|}}'''
{{clear}}

{{japan}}
{{azn}}
{{Commonwealth}}
{{Hentai}}
 
{{timeline|Article of the Now July 9 and 10, [[2022]]|[[Boris Johnson]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Hunter Biden]]}}
[[Category:Japan]]

{{Timeline|Featured Article January 10 and 11, [[2024]]|[[Viper]]|[[{{PAGENAME}}]]|[[Rina Palenkova]]}}

Japan

2026-05-15T10:33:26Z

Gooksu:

:''"[[Jap]]" redirects here. For [[Jewish]] [[American]] [[Disney|Princess]], see [[Kikes]].''

{{offended}}
{{achtung|FORMER JAPANESE PRIME MINISTER <s>GOT</s> WAS SHOT DURING A CAMPAIGN AND WILL SOON BE WORM RIDDEN}}
{{Warning|JAPAN HAS RAISED THE AGE OF CONSENT FROM 13 TO 16}}
{{breakingnews|[https://www.japantimes.co.jp/news/2015/07/15/national/crime-legal/hit-global-criticism-japan-bans-individual-possession-child-porn-images-manga-exempt/#.VaYNdfmqqlQ JAPAN BANS POSSESSION OF CHILD PORN]}}
{{spoilers|JAPANESE MEN COOK THEIR OWN [[Penis|GENITALS]] AND [[HA HA HA, OH WOW|EAT THEM]], JAPANESE DAOYU ISLAND OWNER IS A CORRUPTED [[Pedophile|PEDOPHILE]] CAPITALIST, HIS WIFE TRIED TO [[AN HERO]], AND [[Liar|HE LIED OVER 9000 DOLLARS FROM ALL JAP AND OTAKUS!]]}}

[[File:Crappingoutjapan.jpg|thumb|As always, [[South Korea]] best explains the origin of the Jewpanese Islands.]]
[[File:Japanese family.jpg|thumb|Typical Japanese family]]
[[File:1339001142310.jpg|thumb|The Japs now thank the Atomic Bomb in making their [[Shit|art]] [[Anime|a]] [[Hentai|lot]] [[Guro|better]].]]
[[Image:Japaninanutshell.jpg|thumb|[[Evolution]]]]
[[File:The "shi" creators.jpg|thumb|350px|Japanese with name containing "[[2 girls 1 cup|shi]]", creates great things.]]
[[File:Japanesepenis.gif|thumb|350px|Japanese men have small dicks]]
[[File:norapenobase.jpg|thumb|350px|Japanese women require American Army Dick and will withhold base to get it. No rape? Then no base!]]
'''The Democratic People's Republic of Animestan''' (also known as '''Jewpan''', '''[[Weeaboo]]topia''' and '''Nuclear Testing Site''') or more commonly known politically-correct as '''Japan''' is a totalitarian fifth-world dystopia on a radioactive wasteland in the Pacific Ocean with less sanity and human rights than even [[Best Korea]]. It is best known for being the inventors of [[anime]] and therefore being the #1 cause of [[Asperger's Syndrome]] on the planet. Their [[Basement-dweller|men]] are autistic [[sick fuck]]s who enjoy raping [[loli|little girls]], and their women are [[Whore|gold-digging]] pathological liars who would rather go marry and scam rich foreigners than fuck their own manchildren back home.

Japan is basically to Asia what [[Israel]] is to the Middle East. Both are ruled by racist criminal mobsters (Yakuza vs Zionist Illuminati) and have a history of both being genocided (Hiroshima and US concentration camps vs Holocaust and German concentration camps) while committing genocide at the same time (Koreans are Japan's Palestinians). Every single nation in Asia (with the sole exception of the Japanese's loyal sex slaves, the [[Philippines|sea niggers]]) hates Japan and would want to erase this microstate of degenerates off the Earth if not for the [[Jewnited States]] giving them military equipment... again just like Israel. Japan's current military is the 9th strongest in the world, but there are some bases that are still [[All Your Base Are Belong To Us|used by Americans]], again, just like Israel. ''And for the last time, just like the Kikes'', the Japs control the Internet media through their use of viral [[meme]]s and [[hentai|degenerate entertainment]], but the Jews at least won't resort to shitty cartoons (unless you're [[MLP|Lauren Faust]]) to mind control half the human population into instant [[retard]]s. Japanese women are also known as [[Hillary Clinton|filthy amoral and borderline-sociopathic]] [[feminists]] who have an obsession with your [[Jew Gold]] and will only date you so that she can blackmail you for money (e.g. the Chikan false rape accusations) then Hannibal-Lecter you into suicide. Wonder if all Japs need a massive nose to pass them off as kikes.

[[File:Russian roullete.jpg|thumb|350px|For the record, some toys from Japan look like this]]

Japan is a perfect example of [[b/|"not-as-good-as-it-used-to-be."]] Before being raped by the atom bomb, Japan was busy doing just that to [[Ireland|inferior countries]], but with a Katana instead of the mighty power of the atom. After the USA's rampage, however, it degraded into what you see now. Most of Japan's population has [[aspergers]] caused by the radioactive [[PWNED|bombs we dropped on their asses]]. That—combined with the fact that every Japanese man, woman, and child is on [[crack]]—explains why everything Japan makes is so fucking weird. But somehow, Japan loves [[Germany]]: the whores want to suck Hitler's dick while he himself called them honorary Aryans. The most plausible theory on why [[Hitler]] could love who amounts to Asian Jews is because the Japanese used to be a bunch of strict decent honorable and civilized humans until a [[Albert Einstein|Jewish aspie]] invented the nuke [[IDIFTL|for Science]] and therefore spread his radiation upon the entire Japanese population, mutating them all into the Aspie Jews they are today.

Japan is known for being the country with the lowest calculated crime rate in the entire universe. Which isn't that surprising when you think about it, since Japan doesn't count drug dealing, prostitution, necrophilia, pedophilia, weapon dealing, extortion, blackmail, cannibalism, male rape, and Yakuza (Japanese impersonators of Elvis) gang wars as "crimes".

Japs rarely exceed 150 cm in height. Most Japs would much rather be white, and some undergo limited ''caucasiaplasty'' to this end. Also, since they [[Pro-Ana|have a very light diet]], the vast majority of Japanese [[wimmins]] have no [[tits]]. The few who have large tits end up as [[whores]], which explains why porn of titted Japs exists. Theoretically, this could be solved with a little whale milk, but since they [[Whale Wars|kill whales]] just to be [[conservative]], they produce a nice duality, as an endangered Pacific string bean that's good for nothing and an endangered Pacific tub of lard that's good for nothing.

To their credit, they create good cameras and televisions and have invented flash memory that is used in USB sticks.

{{archive|zF8JL|An expert describes why Japan is so full of fail (TL;DR)}}

[[Image:Anti-jp.jpg|thumb|Bestselling Sign in Asia.]]

==[[World War II|History]]==
Japan was founded at least 100 years ago during the time of Adam and Eve and the dinosaurs, way before Jesus. The first emperor of Japan was Jimmu, crowned in 600BC. The most famous emperor of Japan was Hirohito (Showa).

[[Image:Hiroshima_bomb.jpg|thumb|left|pwnt]]
[[Image:Japanese Woman cuts off Chinese penis.gif|thumb|Japanese conducted torture and mass experiments on Chinese during [[World War II]], and their women castrated the entire Chinese male population. Here a Japanese woman cuts off a [[Chinese]] man's [[penis]].]]

{{quote|It really surprised me that the Japanese sided with the Nazis during World War II. They're usually so polite.}} 

After having messy [[buttsecks]] with [[Hitler]], Emperor Hirohito sent his buttboy, Tojo, and troops into Korea to buy Tamagotchis. The Japanese soldiers proceeded to rape, pillage and [[bukkake]] the Koreans and Chinese to near-annihilation. Afterwards, the Jap troops then proceeded to fuck the corpses of the women they killed.

President Roosevelt sent a telegram to Hirohito requesting [[buttsecks]] too, but due to a mis-translation, the Japanese flew over Pearl Harbour and sunk a few battleships by dropping Mitsubishis and Pocky from their Gundams.

Your grandmother decided it was a good idea to build some bullets and bombs, but the United States needed someone to test the bombs on, and who better than a bunch of antagonistic slopes? [[Americunts]] considered fighting them hand to hand, but decided Japs weren't even worth the time. [[truth|The nukes were a most practical and efficient way]]. So Truman [[and nothing of value was lost|pwned the fuck out of Hiroshima on August 6th, 1945.]] But that cunt Tojo wouldn't surrender. To shut Japan the fuck up, Truman [[pwnt|bombed]] [[Shit no one cares about|Nagasaki]] three days later, [[for the lulz]].

Japan surrendered, and to this day have been the bitch of the [[America|USA]].

Fun Fact: The Epicness of the bombings would continue to show for years to come as [[over 9000|hundreds of thousands]] of civilians died from [[Epic Win|horrifying radiation poisoning, hideous mutations]] and other shit nobody cares about, except for Koreans who rightfully point and laugh every chance they get.
[[Image:typical_japfag.jpg|thumb|left|Typical japfag]]

==The Japanese are an Endangered Species==

[[File:Rapistgook.png|thumb|left|The [[typical]] Japanese salaryman, a lowly degenerate pedophile with no concept of morals.]]
[[Image:Jap_pop_chart.png‎|thumb|100px|The Japanese: an Endangered Species]]
[[File:Sumo Love.jpg|thumb|Why Japs don't have sex]]
[[Image:Autojerker.jpg|thumb|Also why Japs don't have sex]]
[[File:1071358018863.jpg|thumb|They literally never have sex]]
[[File:Friendmaker.png|185px|right]]

With poetry skills to rival even the most hardened [[emo]], Japan was once the world's foremost macho culture. Big mustaches, leather clothes, manly sex between friends in bath houses—it was all there. Nippon is also the land of the Hot Babe. In Japan, the streets teem with the same seething, supple-limbed female honeys for which the Land of the Rising Sun has always been famous -- ''and each and every one of them longs for a real man to [[guro|Put It To Her]] the good old fashioned way''.

That is, until the Kikes and their [[America|imperialist]] [[England|ambitions]] came. The Kikes wanted to fuck all of the hot wahmen, only to find angry Samurai ready to chop their dicks off for trying. So, they turned to using Britain to bankrupt China during the Opium wars. Japan, not wanting to be bankrupted by Jew degeneracy as China was, became best friends with [[Hitler]]- a man who [[Weeaboo| admired them as Honorary Aryans with better culture than his own German race]]. Because of this, the Jewnited States dropped the nuke of retardation that changed Japan forever.

[[truth|It is a proven fact that the only real men left in Japan were killed in WWII and as a result, the Japs are not even having enough children to make up for the annual number of deaths: they are an endangered species]] [see chart -- yes, it's for real]. They are now forced to import [[Niggers|Filipinos]] in a vain attempt to make up the difference.

Now all the men in Japan look like women and [[gay|actively play the part]]. Instead of boning the most fabulous babes on earth and breeding a new generation of ass-whipping samurai, these quasi-men prefer whacking off to cartoon characters getting their heads eaten, playing with toys, and spending hours at a time in deep ass play.

One of the contributing factors of the population decline is that of all of Chinks, modern Japanese men have the smallest penises(notice how all of the japs in this article have micro dicks). As a result, Japanese girls have become ruthless feminist gold diggers who will only use the men for money then leave them to die off once they have outlived their usefulness. But despite being feminists Japanese women crave the slightly bigger White cock or the [[lie|giant]] [[The Great Black Dick Hoax|Black Cock]] and are completely submissive to [[White]] and Black men. Yes, even though the Japanese are famously [[racist]] against {{wayback|http://nsjap.net/|20050628013438|title=every other race}}, this need not rule out even the spottiest [[Ginger|Irish]] or fattest American [[Star Trek]] geek as long as they have the cash and/or cock they want.

The men, due to brain cancer and mental retardation caused by the radiation, became [[sick fuck]] necrophiliacs that like to kill and rape female corpses and masturbate to schoolgirls in thigh-high socks getting strangled with their own entrails. Even Japan knows that [http://www.sankakucomplex.com/2011/01/13/third-of-young-japanese-men-hate-sex/ 1/3 of Japanese men hate sex] and thus because of [[Kike|Einstein]], it has always been this way.

[[Pedophilia]], like guro and necrophilia, is not only accepted in Japan, but also compulsory. The '''{{archive|oBrB|age of consent in Japan}}''' is 13, but usually it actually happens around the age of six. [[At least 100|110%]] of Japanese men are pedofags. [[CP]] is the leading export of Japan and they plan to spread it across the world. Many students have open relationships with their teachers and when the Japs heard that the teachers, coaches and priests from Jewmerica back in early 2000s were molesting little children, their response was "We can do better than that." None of this helps the birth rate, however because these cowardly microdick fucks don't have the balls to fuck a fertile adult or teen bitch. Their birth rates continue to drop and if we're lucky enough to see <s>Susanowo</s> Poseidon throw another lulzy tsunami at these tojos, this entire country of degenerates is expected to die out by 2030.

==FFFUUUCHKA YOUU WWAAAHLEEARU !!!!!!!!!==
:''For more details, see: [[Whale Wars]]''
[[Image:Japan Australia whaling.jpg|thumb|left|100px|Japan vs Australia in countryball form.]]
Japan's favorite pastime, other than [[bukkake]], raping corpses, and working until their eyes and brain bleed from not sleeping, is viciously slaying the evil whale and/or dolphin menace. In fact the whole reason behind their space program is so they can be [[Futurama|whalers on the moon]].

[[Last Thursday]], the [[Australia|Australian]] government asked Japan to stop <s>whaling</s> [[beastiality|harvesting whales for science]] in Australian Antarctic waters, because you should only kill endangered species in your own country.

[[BAWWW|Being a teeny-tiny bit sensitive to criticism]], Japanese [[JewTube|YouTubers]] and their [[Wapanese|sympathizers]] proceeded to hurl every bizarre insult at Australia that they could think of through the medium of KikeTube comments and [[TL;DW]] videos—in [[Engrish|hilariously broken English]]. It would appear that Australia only cares about animals that look cute—they are [[lolwut|kangaroo-killing hypocrites]], who want to destroy the Japanese culture like they did to the [[Aboriginals]]. This is totally OK.

How Aussies telling the Japs to GTFO of THEIR waters will stop them is unclear at this point. But much like the Chinese civilians after the last Japanese invasion of China, the Aussies are clearly [[asking for it|asking for a decapitated-neckhole rapin’]].

Most Aussies won't argue that whaling is better than the Japanese soldiers [[vore|eating]] prisoners of war. [[Wikipedia:Japanese war crimes#Cannibalism|Read all about it!]] (Also note how long the list of war-crimes is.)

==[[Japan Crisis of 2011|Lulzy Earthquakes]]==

[[Last Thursday]] Japan was hit by a [[Hæti|huge earthquake]] of [[over 9000]] magnitude. This, of course, is not surprising because Japan is about as prone to natural disasters (magnified by their own [[derp|retardation ]]) as [[Africa]] is to [[AIDS]]. To amplify the mental retardation, they built nuclear reactors close to the shoreline. Oh Japan, you so craaaaazy.

What is surprising, however, is that one of the world's richest nations has completely failed to prepare for this inevitable pwning by GodJesus and as a result, civilized countries like [[Isreal]] and the U.S. must lend the Japanese tree fiddy, so that they can rebuild all the animu studios and child sex factories destroyed by the disaster.

The earthquake did however, kill thousands of Japs. This granted those Japs their sexual fantasies and their radioactive corpses served as the sex toys for the survivng Japanese. Rumor has it that some of the Japanese are still skull-fucking their bones today.

[[Image:Nuclear Simpsons.jpg|thumb|Where off switch?]]

[[Image:Japantsunami.jpg|thumb|Pwnt by a tsunami minutes after being pwnt by an earthquake and then getting pwnt by radiation]]

==[[Wapanese|Japanophiles]]==

[[Image:Cosplay.jpg|thumb|Every [[cosplay]]er ever]]
[[Image:Wtf_Japanese_butt_gun.gif|thumb|Japanese technology is being adapted to deter rapists and [[Weeaboo]]s]]

The purest form of [[faggotry]]...

[[Weeaboos|Japanophiles]] are [[White|western people]] who love everything to do with Japan, even the [[creepy]] shit, like the coin-operated panty dispensers and [[ganguro|blackfaced, autistically screeching wahmen]]. They are usually [[fat]] and [[Basement dweller|socially inept]] (male), or fat and [[retard|delusional about their looks]] (female) and can be identified by their ''[[Cowboy Bebop]]'' ([[Naruto]] [[lie|is the new coolect animu evar that will still be popular in 100 years!]]) wallscrolls, appreciation for [[J-pop]] and insistence on [[cosplay]]ing. Not to mention walking around the city with a fucking [[Pocky]] sticking out of the mouth. Many [[Wapanese|Japanophiles]] are to be found at Colleges such as Earlham and Oberlin, where they form [[anime]] clubs and dress up like [[furfags|retarded faggy space elves with fox ears and capes]].

Japanophilia is not to be confused with [[pedophilia]], as there are several key differences. For example, [[ohbutyouwillpet|pedophiles]] are obsessed with making love to children whereas [[Applemilk1988|weeaboos]] are obsessed with <s>Anime</s> degeneracy, writing with chopsticks, [[Bittorrent|downloading gigabytes]] of [[hentai]] and annoying the fuck out of you at parties by [[TL;DR|talking at length]] about their [[Bullshit|interpretation]] of ''[[Neon Genesis Evangelion]]''. Both, however, masturbate over [[Lolicon|pictures of schoolgirls]].

Weebfags do not reproduce by [[Secks|conventional means]]; most die as [[virgin]]s and those that do not are usually imprisoned for [[rape]]. Instead, they use the [[internet]] to influence vulnerable teenagers to watch episodes of ''[[Animu|Trigun]]'' before leading them on to the [[Erection|harder]] (and [[Computer Science III|less comprehensible]]) [[Crap|stuff]]. Soon the [[anime]] [[meme]] has infected the poor teen's [[brain]] and he has become a mindless Japanophile too.

The Japanophile's life cycle can end three ways; either dying an elderly virgin surrounded by small plastic figurines that cost hundreds of dollars each, being raped to death in prison (oh, [[teh]] [[irony]]!) or committing [[Suicide|IRL self-pwnage]] after arriving at Japan and discovering that it's not full of enormously-breasted women who want to sleep with pasty, gaijin lardballs. The [[NOVA|last words]] of the latter Japanophiles are usually "[[Megatokyo]] lied to me..."

FUN FACT: [[irony|Converse to how Weeaboos dry hump anything to do with Japanese culture, western culture is actually popular among Japanese teenagers]]. Proof of this is displayed with how many Japs dye their hair blonde and speak English.

==Japanese Language==
[[Image:Commit Sudoku.png|thumb|400 px|<s>Seppuku</s> SUDOKU!]]
[[Moonspeak|Japanese]] is a language learned by [[Weeaboos|retards]] affected by severe [[Pink Guy Disease]] who claim that they're learning it because they "enjoy Japanese culture" when they're actually enjoying [[Animu|anime]]. The "Japanese culture" they enjoy learnin' about can also involve Japan's most dark stuff, like Shintoism/Buddhism and other false gods, ritualistic suicide, Unit 731 (a chemical/biological warfare research unit in a Japanese puppet state), and of course, ''all those damn earthquakes, floods, and other weather shit.''

For their years of rigorous training, Japanese language teachers get to instruct unmotivated American teenagers with [[Pink Guy Disease]] and/or [[Acute Cultural Conformist Syndrome]] in the basics again and again while one half writes ''[[Ouran High School Host Club]]/[[Harry Potter]]'' [[crossover]] [[fanfiction]] in class and the other watches the latest fan-subbed ninja fan-service anime on their [[mac|$2,000 laptops]]. Even though a tiny percentage actually finish the course, they have no real use for it other than fansubbing [[anime]] or re-translating a ''[[Final Fantasy]]'' game. If you're hopeful, ''at least'' a very tiny amount of those weens will cheerfully master Japanese to work as humble, cheerful overseas protestant Christian pastors, '''as only 1% of Japs in the ENTIRE NATION claim to be Christians. This is absolutely true.'''

[[fail|This is a worthwhile use of their time since at least 99.05% of American translators are close-minded [[Elite|Worldwide Tech Oligarchy]] supporting, marxist AmeriKKKans who are unable to understand the elevated cultural value of Japanese children's cartoons]]. As strange as it sounds, the last sentence is not irony. No, it's just stupid.
[[Image:Google_Translate_Engrish.png|thumb|341 px|[[Google]] Transrate fails, defaults to [[Engrish]]]]
In addition to speaking their [[Moonspeak|native tongue]], the Japanese also speak an interesting language called [[Engrish]], which can be seen on many slave-produced billboards and products.Their writing system consists of over 9000 brain-exploding, complicated symbols stolen from [[Taiwan|Tiny China]] by anime [[pirates]]; only a few simplified ones are used in their alphabet, and naturally took on the appearance of destructive whaling harpoons, deadly katanas and morally toxic dildos of all kinds/every dildo known to men.

In the video section, please to find a Demo of their so called... ":*(&^%$^ENGRISH^$%^&)*:" It has an accurate subtitle...

===How to get around in Japan===
[[Image:Japanese period.jpg|thumb|150px|Japanese Flag]]
Since we at ED care about your Japanese experience, we've collected some useful Japanese phrases you can use when you meet a Jap!

*''Boku/Pocky wa _________'' - My name is ________.
*''Kyokon dii~rudo wo tabetai'' - I would like to eat some delicious cake.
*''Sono shimbun wo kaimashita'' - I am not fluent in Japanese, can we speak English?
*''Kimi no imouto wo reipu shitai'' - Please take a seat over there...
*''Anime wo mitari, manga wo yondari shitai'' - I want to do things like watch anime and read manga.
*''DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU'' - I am not a Weaboo, now will you stop looking at me like that?
*''Chin-chin wo namesaseruzo'' - Problem, officer?

==How To Troll Japs==
[[Image:orangebear.jpg|thumb|right|160px|[[Serious business|Yeah]].]]
[[File:Neko Cock.gif|thumb|Beckoning.]]

In what could be one of the most hilarious cases of Irony of all time, the most expertised in trolling the Japanese, are in fact, their own demonspawn, the [[weeaboo]]s, even if they aren't doing it intentionally. The Japanese want to present themselves to the world as civilized strict people and do this by shunning NEETs (euphemism for [[aspie]]s) and putting them in mental hospitals but once a fat wapanese dressed in a Sailor Moon costume and smells of Pocky lands shouting "BAKASUGOIKAWAIIDESUNE" everywhere and raiding used Japanese schoolgirls' panties, the masquerate of discipline is shattered and reveals Japan for the aspie-infested [[lolcow|laughing stock of the world]] that it is. This is why, if you ever meet a person who is decently mannered and seems normal, but reveals he is in fact Japanese, then binge yourself on [[4chan]], [[TV Tropes]], [[Pokemon]] and the most disgusting Hentai you can ever find on the Internet, inform everyone of the truth and in front of the Jap reenact everything in a barrage of Sugoikawaiibakadesune ala [[Chris-chan]] on steroids. With everyone knowing that this disgusting autistic shit is Japanese Culture, he will definitely be humiliated forever and possibly bullied to [[suicide|harakiri]].

Of course, using this tactic is like a Palestinian strapping a suicide bomb upon himself to kill Kikes, since if your audience is too short-sighted then they may assume you, not him, as the aspie. There are less effective, but safer methods, however.

*Say anything good about Korea (both Koreas), anything at all.
*Say that Zettai ryouiki is [[overrated]]. (Really it is)
*Tell them how Dokdo and Diaoyu are parts of Korea and China, Iturup, Kunashir, Shikotan are parts of Russia and "Takeshima" & "Senkaku" are just [[pussy]] land grabs.
*If you're a female, don't wear thigh-high socks, pantyhose, or other hosiery. Japs are Arabs with legs and despise uncovered legs with a fiery hate. Going bare-legged to the Japanese is considered the ultimate blasphemy and worse than murder. They will kill any girl that doesn't and rape her corpse.
*If you produce hentai, never draw any character wearing thigh-high socks, pantyhose, or other hosiery. (WARNING, you might get killed.) If you're Japanese doing this will be considered the highest of highest treason in Japan.
*Tell them that Hiroshima and Nagasaki were the happiest moments of the HUMAN race. Yes, Japs are retarded evil monkeys designed by [[Xenu]]
*Tell the Japanese that they are now America's economic bottom bitch despite the fact that they are one of the most wealthy nations in the world. That's what they deserved for trying to over-expand their borders during WWII and then getting pwned by Amurika!
*Spell the Japanese capital with an 'i' instead of a 'y'.
*Post a picture of a nuclear explosion with the caption "[[pwnd]]".
*Post a picture of Japanese internment camps with the caption "[[pwnd]]". For more lulz, praise Michelle Malkin's book of Japanese internment.
*Deliberately confuse them with [[Korea|Gooks]].
*Talk to them in Korean or Chinese, and expect them to understand you completely.
*Say karaoke is Korean.
*Call them "Japs", "[[Azn]]", or [[Pokemon|Pokeymanz]].
*Show 'em this (although they might fap to it):
 
<center>{{frame|<youtube>sOFg8oWMHRM</youtube>
<center>'''So [[kawaii]], amirite?'''}}</center>
 
*Produce hentai without Zettai ryouiki (and all other hosiery and thighhigh legwear) AND without death, guro, and snuff.
*Say that you learned Japanese tradition through [[anime]].
*Tell them that China can invade Japan at any time.
*Tell them that North Korea can Nuke them at any time.
*Brought up any atrocities they committed during WW2 Such as the Nanjing massacre, If they told you that they deserve it, brought up all the Jap wahmen the Americunts and the Ruskies raped during the occupation or any of the atrocities the Soviets committed against them and ask them if they deserve it as well. bonus point if they rage quitted and blocked you.
*Remind them if it wasn't for the Americunts, they would've been a province of China or Russia by now.
*Never use png image format. (Like their hentai, oversized things arouse them)
*Post a low-res picture of Japan being ejaculated upon by multiple high-res penises.
*Mention that they come from Korea and everything in their culture is Korean.
*Tell them that they originate in Southeast Asia.
*Walk by a schoolgirl.
*Then tell them what retards they are for going all "dumbshit fantard" over some shitty Jpop singer for no other reason than that he's Japanese.
*Upload a ton of Jap-made mods for Japanese games up for free downloading. The more uploaded for download, the better. MikuMikudance is a perfect example because the MMD community treats the game and themselves as some sort of fucking secret club. Often times on the few downloads they offer they put secret passwords on them. And so they get really pissed off about MMD stuff being shared (as well as passwords and links). [[Irony|They especially get mad when R18 models and videos are made.]] And make them easy and convenient to download; that will surely enrage the retarded Japs.
*Tell them that you don't like snuff and guro
*Tell them that there is no such thing as a pure Japanese.
*Tell them that they came from [[Jews|the Kikes]], especially since the degenerate Kikes have influence in their government.
*Tell them you like [[Godzilla|Godzilla]]
*Mention the war crimes commited by their military in WWII.

==Brutally True Facts==

[[File:Meanwhile in Japan.png|thumb|One of the most popular [[sport]]s in Japan.]]
[[File:Horyshit.jpg|thumb|Japanese man at work]]

*All Japanese citizens have [[Ass Burgers]], and most of them are [[weird|introverts]].
*[[Pink Guy Disease]] has become such an epidemic in Japan, that all Japanese infants are mandated to be screened by domestic therapists and doctors for [[autism|the tisms'.]]
*PGD sufferers in Japan spend their whole childhoods in dirty, worn-down, [[liberalism|leftist]] [[retarded|Special Sylum's]] or self-contained leftist classrooms, and are left without meaningful jobs when they become adults (other than manufacturing your [[anime|slave-made animu merchandise and figures]]).
*'''Pink Guy Disease has increased in Japan over 933%''' due to the introduction of [[minimalism|Flat Design]], Otaku tourism, and [[YouTube Kids]] and all its vile platforms orchestrated by that [[Hollywood|globalist, fascist Hollywood corp]] called [[YouTube]].
*All Japanese citizens are on [[crack]] in AT LEAST SOME KIND OF FORM, from colorful Konpeito candies to actual [[Venezuela|Venezuelan]] cocaine. This fact brought to you by ED's own Japanese editor, [[Kazuhiro]].
*All male Japanese are either [[drag queens]] or [[transexuals]] or [[80 year old Chinese man in panties|perverted old]] basement dwellers who sell hentai doujins. It's now almost impossible to find good, moral male Japs who are still alive (and sell pure, non-perv thingies, like [[candy|candied vegetables]] or [[Spongebob Rectal Thermometer|singing battery-operated herbal suppositories]]).
*All Japanese politician's are controlled by socialist fascist Yakuza. Also, it is legal to impersonate Yakuza in Japan.
*All male Japanese are omega as fuck ('''due to a lack of good manly male jobs''' in Wapan-Warudo/World for them) and only get their pieces of strawberry-flavored bum-bum from sex dolls, pillows with their favorite characters printed on them, and corpses from ritualistic Buddhist/Shinto behaviours.
*All female Japanese [[Cockmongler|love great white cock]] and suffer from either [[depression]] or [[megalomania]]. '''If a Japanese mom's kid turns out disabled for whatever reason''' ([[weeaboo|down syndrome]], [[asperger's syndrome|the tisms']], [[Shaye Saint John|traumatic bodily injury from a Shinkansen train accident]] or whatnot), '''her effeminate husband gets divorced and she becomes single.'''
*Japan is known for its [[socialism|socialistic]] ways disguised as [[capitalism]]. In fact, a Jap will do just about anything for a few bucks, including loving you long time for $10 <s>(that's [[Vietnam]] dumbass)</s> (they'll do it too, faggot). If they refuse, threaten to nuke their Chinese cookware and ugly minimalist bedrooms with some Splatoon paint guns smuggled from North Korea. That always works.
*In [[Alternative Medicine|Japanese medicine]], all drugs and most cures are [[in the ass|suppositories]]. Anybody who takes a Japanese drug, simply because it's [[weeaboo|Japanese]], is therefore a douche.
*[[4chan]] was inspired by a Japanese imageboard. Absolutely True!
*Japan's [[mainstream]] [[liberal]] [[tartlets]] are just like [[social justice warriors]], and they will GO APESHIT if they find out you're a [[Republican]]. If so, threaten to nuke their ugly minimalist bedrooms a third time.
*99% of all Japanese people are necrophiliacs and guro-fetishists. This expains why they obsess over some [[Puella Magi Madoka Magica|magical girl in agony getting her head eaten off by a pedophillic clown]]. As they used to say during World War 2, "Dead girls and gore make a Jappy's fappy happy!"
*Japs are like arabs, only they want the legs covered at all times. Girls in Japan who are found going bare-legged (even when bathing and swimming) face torture, death, and having their corpse raped. Anime/manga/hentai producers (even if they're not Japanese) will suffer the same fate if they don't draw thighhigh socks (regardless of gender). Liking and drawing bare-legs, going bare-legged, not liking/not drawing stockings/thighhighs/hosiery are considered by the Japanese to be the worst crimes. In Japan, people who prefer bare-legs are hated like anti-tax people are hated in the US; worse than terrorists. Japanese despise bare legs.
*Japs love [[Americunts]] when comparing other Chinks, but hate weeaboos. Yet they hate Americans for the two [[epic]] bombs that they dropped on two shitty villages that started a chain of faggotry in Japan. Basically these two-faced, double-standard cunts hate everyone.
*Japanese think their religion is [[J-pop|Ayumi Hamasaki]] cause there's truly no other way to explain [https://tokyofashion.com/ayumi-hamasaki-fan-cars-in-tokyo/ this.]
*Japs love eating literal shit and anything they can find like insects '''{{ytlink|Nl9x8412W2U|Srsly}}'''. [[Some argue|Some believe]] this is a result of the radioactive materials that have been released since the Japan Crisis of 2011.
*The Japanese descend from deported criminals and chicken fuckers from numerous Central and East Asian countries. [[shit_nobody_cares_about|The Ainu are the original inhabitants of the Japanese archipelago and were raped and murdered off their land into the most northern tip of Japan.]] Also, ten lost tribes of Jews from Israel went there and interbred with the Japanese. After the mighty nuke of retardation was dropped, the Japanese have finished their full transformation into Autistic Jews.
 
{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|nippon|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>97KKioTCJvw</youtube>
;Explanation of dating etiquette in Japan
|<youtube>7G46YMyQjBY</youtube>
;Japanese Pastime.
|<youtube>yGvJZpkO3J8</youtube>
;Japan's traditional sport.
|<youtube>7_p0qAIuHdE</youtube>
;Another Japanese invention
|<youtube>4ua64HbsBUo</youtube>
;Japan can be [[awesome]] sometimes.}}
|}}
}}
 
==<s>Senkaku Islands</s> Daoyu Islands==

Just last thursday, a big dramafest emerged between the chinks and the Japs for a set of small, useless pseudo-islands. Some stupid redneck chinks being the patriots they are, boarded the Daoyu island (also known as fishing island, pretty shitty name) and got pwned by Japan's sea tactic known as "double penetrations". The chinks were then arrested and got buttraped in Japan tentacle prison (truth reveal, the owner of the island is a Jew. Like Josef Fritzl, he put the bitches in the kitchens while trolling all other chinks outside the island).

The chinks then responded by burning Japanese cars, boycotting Japanese products, and chink-chimping. [[Wikipedia]] was no alien to that drama, [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Senkaku_Islands&action=history providing a nice dose of butthurt and lulz].

== Gallery ==
 
{{cg|Kawaii|Japan Gallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Japan I Love You-small.png|The Japanese: Masters of the written word.
File:Beef rectum.jpg|
Image:Boob swords.gif
Image:Jap mouth-legs.gif
Image:Bloody Japanese porn.gif
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Bikinicaca.jpg|Nothing is quite as satisfying as shitting one's bikini
Image:Kawaiidesu.jpg
Image:JapanWeird.jpg
Image:japan.jpg
Image:RisingSUN.jpg
Image:Japanese vending machine.gif|Japs are so necrophiliac they have vending machines with dead girls in them.
Image:64nowayisthisreal1.jpg
Image:Snail-girl-lol-japan.jpg
Image:Jap cum bath.gif
Image:Taste Test.jpg
Image:Japanese menu.gif
Image:Crab jap.gif
Image:Jap dentist.jpg
Image:Jap vag.gif
Image:Japanese ambulance.gif
Image:Japanese blowjob.gif
File:Gaysexlol.jpg|Fuckin' Faggets
Image:Japanese Porn.jpeg
Image:Typical Jap.gif
Image:Jap forehead.gif
File:Japan8833.jpg
File:Nuke Sizes.jpg
Image:Jap erection.gif
Image:Japanese van.jpg
File:Neverquitanempire.jpg
Image:Japanese porn.jpg
Image:WTF Japan.jpg
Image:Akihabara Rail Mechanophilia.jpg
Image:Sumo-fighters.JPG|GET IN MAH BELLY!
Image:Sliding Jap.gif|Just your average Japanese sport
Image:FA-Godzilla.jpg|Japan's most famous resident
Image:Dongs france vs usa vs japan.jpg|[[lie|Of course French guys have larger dicks than Americunts]]. [[butthurt|Too bad America STILL won the war.]] Also, [[fact|Frenchie likes German cock up the ass.]]
Image:JAPAN.gif
Image:Whale_furry_nippon.jpg|The Japs disrespect whales in [[rape|more ways]] than one.
Image:Jap_dad-dead_baby_manta_ray.jpg|[[engrish|YOU BLING GLATE DISHONOL ON OUR FAMIRY YOU MUST BE PUNISHED]]
Image:Pantynomnom.jpg|Japan superior
Image:Fuckingjapanese.gif|Bananas? In my sanity?
image:Flamethrowersandjaps.jpg|Jewtubers speak the truth.
Image:Aishinozaki.jpg|Ai Shinozaki -- a typical Japanese girl. Apparent age: 20. Actual age (as of 2009): 17
Image:Wapanese.gif
Image:Japs Keep Moving.jpg|The proper way to greet a Japanese family moving into your area.
Image:Chop-suey-glasses.jpg|You too can be Japanese with these glasses.
Image:nicetomeetyou.jpg|It's like saying [[hentai|hello]] in Japanese.
Image:Toastfucking.jpg|Have a piece of that bread bitch.
Image:Nuke Explode.jpg
Image:japansex.jpg
Image:Hiroshima bomb.jpg|Fucking deserved it too.
Image:JapaneseUsedPantyVendingMachine.jpg|[[Sick Fuck|Japanese Used-Panty Vending Machine]]
Image:danglegirl.jpg|[[shibari|String them up!]]
Image:Rapetastik.png|[[Rape]]- in Japan, it's like saying hello!
Image:Analbukkake.jpg|Japan [[censorship|censors]] [[penis|harbl]] because it hates [[faggotry]].
Image:Japanese_watermelon.jpg|Japanese love fucking watermelons.
Image:Smackjaps.jpg
Image:US according to Japan.jpg|A typical example of how Japan views foreign nations.
Image:wtf1111.gif|Little-known Fact: Little Red Riding Hood was Japanese and partial to the nutz.
Image:Japanese_pastime.jpg|One of Japan's many engaging pastimes.
Image:Japanpokemonpedofags.jpg|Japs have small penis and pedos love it!
Image:Nyotaimori.jpg|Typical Japanese dinner.
Image:Aichoaniki-2.png|Typical Japanese [[video game]] design.
Image:Undersea_cables.jpg|Japan breaks the intrawebs.
Image:Weeabo wet dream.jpg|
Image:Fugakutakoika.jpg|Is it paradise?
Image:Vomit1.jpg|How the Japanese reproduce.
Image:Hellsyeah0wo.gif|[[fake|Reminds me of your mother's tits.]]
Image:Japanstache.gif|This is why people don't play the DS
Image:Nazi teardrops.JPG|Japanese [[Shimajiro|toilet training]]
Image:Japanesechristmas.jpg|Typical Japanese X-Mas Present
Image:Eggloaf.jpg|[[Milk bags|In Japan, eggs come in loaves.]]
Image:O_rry.jpg |[[O RLY?|O RLY?]] [[Engrish|ASIAN STYLE!]]
Image:Ironchef chairman kaga eating capsicum.jpg|The Immortal Emperor of Japan.
Image:SlaptheJap.jpeg|Remember Pearl Harbor.
Image:Yay_Hiroshima1945.jpg|Somebody set us up the bomb!
Image:Yay_Nagasaki1945.jpg|OMG! Somebody set us up the bomb too!
Image:TypicalAnimeFanatic.jpg|Typical anime fan
Image:Exciting35.jpg|Best way to kill them is with [[WRY|their own technique.]]
Image:Japmarine.jpg|To scale.
Image:GigaOmorashi.jpg|Typical Japanese girls
Image:Azn mans pasttime.jpg|How Japanese men spend their time.
Image:Sumo-911.jpg|[[Jews did WTC|Japan did WTC]]
Image:Eiffel Tower.jpg|Japan has the Eiffel Tower
Image:Boob machine.jpg
Image:Roflbot-FridayTsunami.jpg
Image:Loljapan.jpg|PANTSUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
Image:MaiShiranuiPlasticCrap.jpg|A typical collection doll in Japan.
Image:Japan_-_Terrifying_Children.jpg
Image:Japan_-_Japanese_Women.jpg|Typical Japanese military man.
Image:Homosexuality_in_japan.jpg|Typical Japanese television program.
Image:Boob_guns.gif|A common occurrence in Japan.
Image:Japanese_Cow_Milking.jpg
File:Experience.jpg
File:Wtf japanese butt gun.gif
File:Japanesescientist.jpg
File:Jap Hairstyles.jpg
File:Hiroshima Ambient Temperature.png
Image:Melancholy_Of_Haruhi_Suzumiya_-_Rape.jpg
File:Nov 2017 Gaijin vs real Japanese.jpg|Gaijin vs. real Japanese people in Japan--Nov 2017 during Trump's visit.
File:Jisforjap.gif
File:JapBitch.jpg|The most famous Japanese woman
File:Japmenfaptothis.gif|Jap men like ball-busting
File:AgroupofshyJapanesewomen.jpg
File:RANRANRU.gif|[[McDonald's]] gets involved in Japan, causing this bullshit used in [[YTPMV]] videos to happen
</gallery>}}
 
==[[World War II]] velly funny neh? [[ROFL|LOTFR]]==
 
<center>{{frame|<youtube>oBudU8BiQw4</youtube>
<center>'''Shit, Japan needs some better history teachers.'''}}</center>
 
{{cg||WWIIgal|center|<gallery>
File:WTF Japan-superior.gif|Japanese [[porn|air force]]
Image:Hitler kawaii.jpg|Hitler is SO kawaii!
Image:Roseanne hitler.jpg
File:Deathtrap.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:Japnazi.gif|Flag of Japan with a [[rave|blacklight]] shining on it
Image:Ww2cosplay4.jpg‎
Image:Ww2cosplay2.jpg‎
Image:Ww2cosplay3.jpg‎
Image:Ww2cosplay.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon6.jpg‎
Image:Ww2cosplay5.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon5.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon4.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon3.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon2.jpg‎
Image:Ww2toon1.jpg‎
</gallery>}}
 
== See Also ==
[[Image:Japantrap.jpg|thumb|Typical Japanese couple.]]
[[File:Glorious nippon merchant.jpg|thumb|100px]]
*[[Ganguro]]
*[[Animé]]
*[[Awwright]]
*[[Suicide#切腹 & 腹切 for the オタク|Hari kari]]
*[[Babyfuck]]
*[[Bukkake]]
*[[Chuoside]]
*[[Guro]]
*[[Domo-kun]]
*[[Necrophilia]]
*[[Nuclear War]]
*[[Mutsuo Toi]]
*[[An Hero]]
*[[Jimbo's Japan Tour, 2007]]
*[[Shimajiro]]
*[[Big Daikon]]
*[[Kato]]
*[[Japanese Bug Fights]]
*[[Sick Fuck]]
*[[Weeaboo]]
*[[I LIEK MILK]]
*[[Whale Wars]]
*[[Fukushima2012]]
*[[Herbivore]]
*[[August 6 & 9 1945]]
*[[Vicki Sigh]]

== External Links ==

[[Image:Mana from Malice Mizer.jpg|thumb|The ideal Japanese "man", 2012]]

*'''{{wikilink|Unit_731|'''Proof''' that the Japanese were sick fucks during WWII}}'''.
*[http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/3699516.stm Japanese women get boyfriend pillow]
*'''{{archive|Yhr98|Fucked-up Japanese Stuff}}'''
*[https://www.toxel.com/tech/2009/06/08/14-cool-vending-machines-from-japan/ Strange technologies.]
*[http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/4092345.stm Japanese men get pussy pillow]
*[https://www.reuters.com/article/newsOne/idUSSP10422420070718 Japanese men turn to sex dolls]
*'''{{ytlink|CKjaFG4YN6g|Japanese women get diarrhea}}'''
*'''{{archive|QpYem|Typical Japanese toys}}'''
*'''{{archive|btElf|Moar Japanese toys}}'''
*<s>[http://www.pornhost.com/7616302885/ Furries and a clown raping a crying Japanese girl while their privates are blurred out. Only in Japan...]</s> (dead)
*[https://www.ep.tc/howtospotajap/ How to spot a Jap]
*[https://web.archive.org/web/20090207052240/https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1137747/Mini-Me-The-robot-doll-looks-sounds-just-like-you.html Get a Japanese pedo doll made...of your likeness!]
*<s>[http://efukt.com/2292_Unwanted_Public_Facials_3.html Jerking off on women in public. Oh, Japan, you so crazy.]</s> (dead)
*[https://theindependent.sg/japanese-mans-first-love-is-a-cockroach-he-imagined-having-sex-and-ate-it-when-it-died/ Japanese man falls in love with a cockroach]
*[https://japantoday.com/category/features/why-the-japanese-are-superior-people Why the Japanese Are a Superior People]
*[https://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/oct/27/japan-urged-to-ban-manga-child-abuse-images "Japan urged to ban manga child abuse images"] – will [[lolicon]] also be banned?
*[https://soranews24.com/2017/03/03/kanagawa-mans-body-found-one-month-after-death-in-a-six-ton-pile-of-erotic-magazines/ Jap "crushed to death by six-ton porn collection"]
=== Videos ===

[[File:Jap Fur.jpg|thumb|Japan does [[Furfag|Furries]].]]

*'''{{ytlink|5PHENQiJFzI|WTF milk}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|yi7YU42TQn4|Typical Day For The Average Japfag}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|n3Jr9YtQ0Vg|Even Popeye hates those sneaky Japs}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|lSEuMumOv0M|A typical Japanese commercial}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|mOrZX2858e8|Proof of Japan's great grammar - Miso Soup - with accurate subtitles...}}'''
*'''{{ytlink|SZzjw2UfUEk|National Anthem of Japan sung by a nigger}}'''
*{{UkrED|Японія|UkrDramatica's article on this}}
*<s>[http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=8d52a769e640ab7fee93 A day with a Japanese girl.]</s> (dead)
*<s>[http://www.pornotube.com/media.php?m=32561 What the Americans came up with in response to weird Japanese porn]</s> (dead)
*<s>[http://www.redtube.com/5583 Just another day in Japan]</s> (dead)
*'''{{archive|pkYyC|}}'''
{{clear}}

{{japan}}
{{azn}}
{{Commonwealth}}
{{Hentai}}
 
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[[Category:Japan]]

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Good Korea

2026-05-15T10:27:30Z

Gooksu: /* See also */

{{Spoilers|SOUTH KOREA HATES SEOUL NOW AND THEY ARE MOVING THEIR CAPITAL TO SEJONG CITY IN 2030}}
{{breakingnews|[https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-67920167 South Korea BANS Dog Eeat]}}
[[File:SamsungcideBomber.jpg|right|thumb|Good Korea's main export]]
{{distinguish|Best Korea}}

'''Good Korea''' (or combined as one word is [[Gorea]]) is an American colony much like Puerto Rico. This is not ironic or in any way in line with ED, it's a just a fact missing from Wikipedia: South Korea is no more sovereign than Puerto Rico. Their army is directly under command of the American Army and their first president was an American Hawaiian military dictator.
Good Korea was one of the [[United States]]' 20th century acquisitions in accordance with the long-term [[Manifest Destiny]].

== Geography ==

Good Korea is immediately south of [[Best Korea]], on the bottom half of a peninsula that is west of [[Japan]]. It has water on both sides. It is a very convenient place for throwing things into [[Best Korea]]. It used to have some good surf beaches, but now they are rather untidy.

== People ==

[[Image:RaelKoreanBlackface.jpg|thumb|Sometimes uppity Koreans show support for the [[niggers]]]]
[[Image:SK military.jpg|thumb|Capitalist, why don't you feed your people?]]

South Koreans belong to a Conservative culture which respects traditional values. The typical South Korean belongs to some or another shady Baptist Church founded in California in the 50s. Since both men and women work long hours for one or another service corporation, and [[nazi|there are no immigrants]], they have more Mc Donalds per capita than any other country in the World, so they can enjoy their traditional food at any time prepared by robots. A dog market exists in Seoul to entertain tourists and help Animal Rights organizations whitewash money. South Korean men like to play golf in their spare time and get drunk with Single Malt Scotch, their traditional spirit. South Korean women like to repeatedly get plastic surgery in their eyelids. Children pass times include math, Starcraft, and studying English to purge themselves of their mother tongue before they are six. Korean girls have become ruthless [[feminist]] gold diggers who will only use the men for money then leave them to die off once they have outlived their usefulness. But despite being feminists Korean women crave the slightly bigger White cock or the [[lie|giant]] [[The Great Black Dick Hoax|Black Cock]] and are completely submissive to [[White]] and Black men.
{{center|{{frame|<youtube>Lf_sEGjC9_4</youtube><center>'''Typical Korean [[Christians]] harass people in public, and are often known as [[gay|gae]][[dog|doks.]]'''</center>}}}}
[[Image:halkas.jpg|thumb|Typical korean [[granny]]]]
[[Image:Dongduk.jpg|thumb|Typical Korean Feminists' Protest Method]]

== Government ==

Good Korea is a suzerain state of the USA, kind of an unincorporated territory. Every five years a new Governor is appointed by the United States Pacific Command. A Reality Show is broadcasted and fake elections are held in a farcical show of moral superiority to the People's Republic of Korea. The subjects are expected to pay for and take part in these celebrations.
Basic freedom of speech or demonstration are forbidden in Good Korea when it touches on political topics: the internalization of this prohibition into self-censorship is what makes them good in the first place.

== Occultism ==

South Korea's first female president and former symbolic first lady [[Wikipedia:Park Geun-hye|Park Geun-Hye]], who won the election through military interference, <s>is under [[Truth|investigation]]</s> [https://www.straitstimes.com/asia/east-asia/south-korea-ex-president-park-geun-hye-leaves-jail-for-medical-care LOL the capricious prostitute got 24 years] for conducting occult rituals and being linked to fortune teller [[Wikipedia:Choi Soon-sil|Choi Soon-sil]], her "shaman adviser" and rumored [[lesbian]] confidante who has been in Park's inner circle since 1994. Choi's father was the shamanistic cult leader [[Wikipedia:Choi Tae-min|Choi Tae-min]] of the Eternal World Religion, who told Park he could channel her dead mother [[Wikipedia:Yuk Young-soo|Yuk Young-soo]], who was assassinated in 1974 by a [[North Korea]]n sympathizer trying to shoot Park's father, South Korean military dictator [[Wikipedia:Park Chung-hee|Park Chung-hee]], who was assassinated in 1979 by the director of his security agency for failing to keep Choi away from his daughter Geun-Hye. From an office in the Non-Hyun [[Dong]] neighborhood, spirits told Choi Soon-sil that North Korea would soon collapse, Choi rewrote Park's speeches to be more shaman-y, she created some corrupt foundations, and Choi had a tablet with secret policy documents on it. On [[Halloween]] 2016, Choi Soon-sil said "I'm sorry. I committed a sin that deserves death." Park Geun-Hye said "it is not true that I am a cult follower and practised shamanistic rituals at the presidential Blue House." '''[[You]]''' can't make this shit up. Stick to [[Starcraft]] and [[Dota2]] South Korea. Currently, after Park Geun-hye, the worst president, [[Wikipedia:Moon Jae-in|Moon Jae-in]]{{Communist}}, the worst anti-American president, \politics like shit. The nickname in Korea is Moon Apocalypse. However, there is hope because all Koreans, With the exception of Moon Jae-in's fanatical supporters, most Koreans hate Moon Jae-in and the Korean opposition party, Power of the People, is in power. After 2022, [[Yoon Suk Yeol]] replaced the regime. After Yoon Suk Yeol was impeached, as of 2026, the president is Lee Jae-myung{{Communist}}.

[[Image:Leejaiming.jpg|thumb|As of 2026, the president of Korea is a puppet of China.]]

== Economy ==

You can make a lotta lotta money in Good Korea. Make sure your mutual funds and IRAs include Good Korean companies. If you can't get a job where you are despite owning a suit, you can be a highly paid English-speaking [[monkey]] to entertain their small children ([https://youtu.be/dXakC04KFz0?t=1391 but only if you're white]). Many Good Koreans might be confused because [[white people]] (like Alan Alda and Jamie Farr) look good in movies and [[you]] don't. But don't worry! They will never fire you no matter how fat, gross, diseased, and lazy you are. And don't forget, although [[Raelian|Raël]] may be [[Perma-ban|banned]] in Korea, he still needs your 10 percent.

Internationally, Good Korea releases [[MMORPG]]s for free, which are usually awful, even by MMORPG standards. Kids will actually pay for extra, useless features on this shit, which will normally make their character look more like a [[fag]] or [[weeaboo]]. The profit Good Korea makes on this faggotry is uncertain, though it could be over 20% of their economy.

[[Image:Japracist.jpg|thumb|Unlike [[Japan|this]] sign, this only exists in Japan and Taiwan.]]

Gorea is trying to take over the world by making and releasing free shitty gay TV Drama + K-poop featuring post-plastic-surgery pretty boys and girls, but no one gave a shit except for a few pathetic [[Koreaboo]]s in South East Asia.

==US Military in Good Korea==
If you are serving in the military, please take advantage of the many prostitutes that populate the red light district. <s>Remember, though: Koreans hate any and all United States soldiers, so avoid asking questions, unless you would like to contribute to the Korean national pastime (other than ''Starcraft''): Blankly staring and giggling.</s>

but after 2015 Now, thanks to the atrocities of China, I like the US and the US military.

Good Koreans are famously hard workers.

It is a known fact that [[Cho Seung-Hui|a Korean cannot kill more than 33 people without killing him or herself.]]

== How to Troll Good Korea ==
* Tell them Korea owes all its Jew to their Japanese Masters.
* Call kimchi a kimuchi.
* Call anyone with [KOR] or [KR] in their IGNs a Kimchiman.
* Describe their country as a big factory
* Congratulate them on being the country that produces and consumes more steel per capita in the World! Segway casually to suicide rates.
* Point out that North Koreans don't have as many prostitute daughters and gamer and asperger sons because they are free to get daily fresh air, community exercise and don't live in a steel and concrete digital sweatshop.
* Point out that eating dog is a disgusting habit not merited by culture since North Koreans would rather starve than eat dog.
* [[shit nobody cares about|Tell them Dokdo belongs to japan.]]
* Make fun of ''Starcraft'' or any of the shitty MMORPGs or MMOFPS they dedicate their worthless lives on.
** Say that worker rushing sucks and only shows that they have a small dick.
* Tell them [[your mom|comfort women]] did 9/11.
* Tell them [[fact|Japan is better]].
* Tell them that their country has a rich, long history of being buttraped and under the control of other countries to such an extent that they have no distinct individual culture.
* Say hello to them on the streets. This will cause them to lock up into a giggling fit of fear.
* [[Fan death|Lock them in a room with a fan turned on because they seriously believe that stupid shit]].
* Be [[Kim Jong Il]].
* Remind them that a lot more so than Japan, South Korea is now America's bitch.
* Remind them that the only sovereign Korean country with its armed forces not directly under the command of a foreign power is the ''Democratic'' ''People's'' Republic of Korea, not their slave puppet state. If they don't remember tell them to just [http://www.globalresearch.ca/south-koreas-armed-forces-to-remain-fully-under-us-military-command/5410849 look it up]
* To add insult to injury, remind them that whereas Japan at least put up a fight before becoming America's butt buddy, South Korea bent over willingly to let America rape them.
** If they do it willingly, it's not rape. Then they're just being fags.
* Tell them that they're the only country in the world where going to the military for 2 years is the only way to become a man. Extra lulz if you mention that most of the time there is spent sucking their CO's cocks and doing their chores while they get $100 a month.
* For more lulz, mistake them for [[japs]].
* Inform an older Korean man that yes, there are gay Koreans.
* Tell them their national soccer team is shitty.
* Convince people Samsung is a Japanese company.
* Remind them that all their good looking women are a product of extensive plastic surgery.

== gallary ==

{{cg|South korea|Gallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Ugly south korean.png|thumb|Good Korea has to Face it: Their [[wimminz]] are ugly
File:Koreanfeminazi.jpg|thumb|Typical korean [[feminazi]] lulz
File:Typicalkoreafemi.jpg|typical [[korean]] feminazi 2
Image:856653883_e0b6ce3eef_o.jpg|thumb|300px|A typical pub in South Korea. Absolutely NOT related to the flag of Korea
Image:sweatshop.jpg|thumb|<s>Good Koreans are famously hard workers. This boy likes his job so much he'll work for less than a cent an hour!!</s> It's China
Image:Boiled alive dogs asians.jpg|thumb|Another reason why south Korea is inferior to [[North Korea|best one]]
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:ChineseCarryOut.jpg|Ancient traditional korean method of [[child abuse|transportation]]
Image:Koreanoparty.jpg|thumb|Looks like no one stuck around to clean up after the party
File:South korean ilustrator kidmos art .jpg|thumb|Korean [[Hentai]]
</gallery>}} 

== See also ==

* [[Johnny Somali]]
* [[Korean]] <s>stereotypes</s> [[fact|FACTS]]
* [[Sarah Jeong]]
* [[PSY]]
* [[Yoon Suk Yeol]]
* [[Squid Game]]
* [[BTS]]
* [[K-pop]]
* [[Chan Ho Park]]
* [[Woo Bum-kon]]
* [[Chan Ho Park|Park Chan Ho]]
* [[Cho Seung Hui]]
* [[Blackpink]]
* [[Koreaboo]]

== External links ==

* [http://www.unwiredview.com/2012/04/20/south-korea-to-ban-cameraphone-shutter-sound-removers/# An example of the moral-faggotry endemic to South Korea.]
* [https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2023/5/17/pig-heads-bbqs-mosque-backlash-tests-s-korea-religious-freedom/# South koreans know how to handle sand nigger.]

== Korean evaluation ==

It's a little exaggerated, but some of it was funny lol.

{{Politics}}
{{Commonwealth}}
{{azn}}
{{Korea}}
{{timeline|Featured article December 28 & 29, [[2024]]|[[Ryan's World]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Hawk Tuah]]}}
[[Category:Countries]]

Good Korea

2026-05-15T10:26:53Z

Gooksu: /* See also */

{{Spoilers|SOUTH KOREA HATES SEOUL NOW AND THEY ARE MOVING THEIR CAPITAL TO SEJONG CITY IN 2030}}
{{breakingnews|[https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-67920167 South Korea BANS Dog Eeat]}}
[[File:SamsungcideBomber.jpg|right|thumb|Good Korea's main export]]
{{distinguish|Best Korea}}

'''Good Korea''' (or combined as one word is [[Gorea]]) is an American colony much like Puerto Rico. This is not ironic or in any way in line with ED, it's a just a fact missing from Wikipedia: South Korea is no more sovereign than Puerto Rico. Their army is directly under command of the American Army and their first president was an American Hawaiian military dictator.
Good Korea was one of the [[United States]]' 20th century acquisitions in accordance with the long-term [[Manifest Destiny]].

== Geography ==

Good Korea is immediately south of [[Best Korea]], on the bottom half of a peninsula that is west of [[Japan]]. It has water on both sides. It is a very convenient place for throwing things into [[Best Korea]]. It used to have some good surf beaches, but now they are rather untidy.

== People ==

[[Image:RaelKoreanBlackface.jpg|thumb|Sometimes uppity Koreans show support for the [[niggers]]]]
[[Image:SK military.jpg|thumb|Capitalist, why don't you feed your people?]]

South Koreans belong to a Conservative culture which respects traditional values. The typical South Korean belongs to some or another shady Baptist Church founded in California in the 50s. Since both men and women work long hours for one or another service corporation, and [[nazi|there are no immigrants]], they have more Mc Donalds per capita than any other country in the World, so they can enjoy their traditional food at any time prepared by robots. A dog market exists in Seoul to entertain tourists and help Animal Rights organizations whitewash money. South Korean men like to play golf in their spare time and get drunk with Single Malt Scotch, their traditional spirit. South Korean women like to repeatedly get plastic surgery in their eyelids. Children pass times include math, Starcraft, and studying English to purge themselves of their mother tongue before they are six. Korean girls have become ruthless [[feminist]] gold diggers who will only use the men for money then leave them to die off once they have outlived their usefulness. But despite being feminists Korean women crave the slightly bigger White cock or the [[lie|giant]] [[The Great Black Dick Hoax|Black Cock]] and are completely submissive to [[White]] and Black men.
{{center|{{frame|<youtube>Lf_sEGjC9_4</youtube><center>'''Typical Korean [[Christians]] harass people in public, and are often known as [[gay|gae]][[dog|doks.]]'''</center>}}}}
[[Image:halkas.jpg|thumb|Typical korean [[granny]]]]
[[Image:Dongduk.jpg|thumb|Typical Korean Feminists' Protest Method]]

== Government ==

Good Korea is a suzerain state of the USA, kind of an unincorporated territory. Every five years a new Governor is appointed by the United States Pacific Command. A Reality Show is broadcasted and fake elections are held in a farcical show of moral superiority to the People's Republic of Korea. The subjects are expected to pay for and take part in these celebrations.
Basic freedom of speech or demonstration are forbidden in Good Korea when it touches on political topics: the internalization of this prohibition into self-censorship is what makes them good in the first place.

== Occultism ==

South Korea's first female president and former symbolic first lady [[Wikipedia:Park Geun-hye|Park Geun-Hye]], who won the election through military interference, <s>is under [[Truth|investigation]]</s> [https://www.straitstimes.com/asia/east-asia/south-korea-ex-president-park-geun-hye-leaves-jail-for-medical-care LOL the capricious prostitute got 24 years] for conducting occult rituals and being linked to fortune teller [[Wikipedia:Choi Soon-sil|Choi Soon-sil]], her "shaman adviser" and rumored [[lesbian]] confidante who has been in Park's inner circle since 1994. Choi's father was the shamanistic cult leader [[Wikipedia:Choi Tae-min|Choi Tae-min]] of the Eternal World Religion, who told Park he could channel her dead mother [[Wikipedia:Yuk Young-soo|Yuk Young-soo]], who was assassinated in 1974 by a [[North Korea]]n sympathizer trying to shoot Park's father, South Korean military dictator [[Wikipedia:Park Chung-hee|Park Chung-hee]], who was assassinated in 1979 by the director of his security agency for failing to keep Choi away from his daughter Geun-Hye. From an office in the Non-Hyun [[Dong]] neighborhood, spirits told Choi Soon-sil that North Korea would soon collapse, Choi rewrote Park's speeches to be more shaman-y, she created some corrupt foundations, and Choi had a tablet with secret policy documents on it. On [[Halloween]] 2016, Choi Soon-sil said "I'm sorry. I committed a sin that deserves death." Park Geun-Hye said "it is not true that I am a cult follower and practised shamanistic rituals at the presidential Blue House." '''[[You]]''' can't make this shit up. Stick to [[Starcraft]] and [[Dota2]] South Korea. Currently, after Park Geun-hye, the worst president, [[Wikipedia:Moon Jae-in|Moon Jae-in]]{{Communist}}, the worst anti-American president, \politics like shit. The nickname in Korea is Moon Apocalypse. However, there is hope because all Koreans, With the exception of Moon Jae-in's fanatical supporters, most Koreans hate Moon Jae-in and the Korean opposition party, Power of the People, is in power. After 2022, [[Yoon Suk Yeol]] replaced the regime. After Yoon Suk Yeol was impeached, as of 2026, the president is Lee Jae-myung{{Communist}}.

[[Image:Leejaiming.jpg|thumb|As of 2026, the president of Korea is a puppet of China.]]

== Economy ==

You can make a lotta lotta money in Good Korea. Make sure your mutual funds and IRAs include Good Korean companies. If you can't get a job where you are despite owning a suit, you can be a highly paid English-speaking [[monkey]] to entertain their small children ([https://youtu.be/dXakC04KFz0?t=1391 but only if you're white]). Many Good Koreans might be confused because [[white people]] (like Alan Alda and Jamie Farr) look good in movies and [[you]] don't. But don't worry! They will never fire you no matter how fat, gross, diseased, and lazy you are. And don't forget, although [[Raelian|Raël]] may be [[Perma-ban|banned]] in Korea, he still needs your 10 percent.

Internationally, Good Korea releases [[MMORPG]]s for free, which are usually awful, even by MMORPG standards. Kids will actually pay for extra, useless features on this shit, which will normally make their character look more like a [[fag]] or [[weeaboo]]. The profit Good Korea makes on this faggotry is uncertain, though it could be over 20% of their economy.

[[Image:Japracist.jpg|thumb|Unlike [[Japan|this]] sign, this only exists in Japan and Taiwan.]]

Gorea is trying to take over the world by making and releasing free shitty gay TV Drama + K-poop featuring post-plastic-surgery pretty boys and girls, but no one gave a shit except for a few pathetic [[Koreaboo]]s in South East Asia.

==US Military in Good Korea==
If you are serving in the military, please take advantage of the many prostitutes that populate the red light district. <s>Remember, though: Koreans hate any and all United States soldiers, so avoid asking questions, unless you would like to contribute to the Korean national pastime (other than ''Starcraft''): Blankly staring and giggling.</s>

but after 2015 Now, thanks to the atrocities of China, I like the US and the US military.

Good Koreans are famously hard workers.

It is a known fact that [[Cho Seung-Hui|a Korean cannot kill more than 33 people without killing him or herself.]]

== How to Troll Good Korea ==
* Tell them Korea owes all its Jew to their Japanese Masters.
* Call kimchi a kimuchi.
* Call anyone with [KOR] or [KR] in their IGNs a Kimchiman.
* Describe their country as a big factory
* Congratulate them on being the country that produces and consumes more steel per capita in the World! Segway casually to suicide rates.
* Point out that North Koreans don't have as many prostitute daughters and gamer and asperger sons because they are free to get daily fresh air, community exercise and don't live in a steel and concrete digital sweatshop.
* Point out that eating dog is a disgusting habit not merited by culture since North Koreans would rather starve than eat dog.
* [[shit nobody cares about|Tell them Dokdo belongs to japan.]]
* Make fun of ''Starcraft'' or any of the shitty MMORPGs or MMOFPS they dedicate their worthless lives on.
** Say that worker rushing sucks and only shows that they have a small dick.
* Tell them [[your mom|comfort women]] did 9/11.
* Tell them [[fact|Japan is better]].
* Tell them that their country has a rich, long history of being buttraped and under the control of other countries to such an extent that they have no distinct individual culture.
* Say hello to them on the streets. This will cause them to lock up into a giggling fit of fear.
* [[Fan death|Lock them in a room with a fan turned on because they seriously believe that stupid shit]].
* Be [[Kim Jong Il]].
* Remind them that a lot more so than Japan, South Korea is now America's bitch.
* Remind them that the only sovereign Korean country with its armed forces not directly under the command of a foreign power is the ''Democratic'' ''People's'' Republic of Korea, not their slave puppet state. If they don't remember tell them to just [http://www.globalresearch.ca/south-koreas-armed-forces-to-remain-fully-under-us-military-command/5410849 look it up]
* To add insult to injury, remind them that whereas Japan at least put up a fight before becoming America's butt buddy, South Korea bent over willingly to let America rape them.
** If they do it willingly, it's not rape. Then they're just being fags.
* Tell them that they're the only country in the world where going to the military for 2 years is the only way to become a man. Extra lulz if you mention that most of the time there is spent sucking their CO's cocks and doing their chores while they get $100 a month.
* For more lulz, mistake them for [[japs]].
* Inform an older Korean man that yes, there are gay Koreans.
* Tell them their national soccer team is shitty.
* Convince people Samsung is a Japanese company.
* Remind them that all their good looking women are a product of extensive plastic surgery.

== gallary ==

{{cg|South korea|Gallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Ugly south korean.png|thumb|Good Korea has to Face it: Their [[wimminz]] are ugly
File:Koreanfeminazi.jpg|thumb|Typical korean [[feminazi]] lulz
File:Typicalkoreafemi.jpg|typical [[korean]] feminazi 2
Image:856653883_e0b6ce3eef_o.jpg|thumb|300px|A typical pub in South Korea. Absolutely NOT related to the flag of Korea
Image:sweatshop.jpg|thumb|<s>Good Koreans are famously hard workers. This boy likes his job so much he'll work for less than a cent an hour!!</s> It's China
Image:Boiled alive dogs asians.jpg|thumb|Another reason why south Korea is inferior to [[North Korea|best one]]
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:ChineseCarryOut.jpg|Ancient traditional korean method of [[child abuse|transportation]]
Image:Koreanoparty.jpg|thumb|Looks like no one stuck around to clean up after the party
File:South korean ilustrator kidmos art .jpg|thumb|Korean [[Hentai]]
</gallery>}} 

== See also ==

* [[Johnny Somali]]
* [[Korean]] <s>stereotypes</s> [[fact|FACTS]]
* [[Sarah Jeong]]
* [[PSY]]
* [[Yoon Suk Yeol]]
* [[Squid Game]]
* [[BTS]]
* [[K-pop]]
* [[Chan Ho Park]]
* [[Woo Bum-kon]]
* [[Chan Ho Park|Park Chan Ho]]
* [[Cho Seung Hui]]
* [[Blackpink]]

== External links ==

* [http://www.unwiredview.com/2012/04/20/south-korea-to-ban-cameraphone-shutter-sound-removers/# An example of the moral-faggotry endemic to South Korea.]
* [https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2023/5/17/pig-heads-bbqs-mosque-backlash-tests-s-korea-religious-freedom/# South koreans know how to handle sand nigger.]

== Korean evaluation ==

It's a little exaggerated, but some of it was funny lol.

{{Politics}}
{{Commonwealth}}
{{azn}}
{{Korea}}
{{timeline|Featured article December 28 & 29, [[2024]]|[[Ryan's World]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Hawk Tuah]]}}
[[Category:Countries]]

Good Korea

2026-05-15T10:26:25Z

Gooksu: /* See also */

{{Spoilers|SOUTH KOREA HATES SEOUL NOW AND THEY ARE MOVING THEIR CAPITAL TO SEJONG CITY IN 2030}}
{{breakingnews|[https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-67920167 South Korea BANS Dog Eeat]}}
[[File:SamsungcideBomber.jpg|right|thumb|Good Korea's main export]]
{{distinguish|Best Korea}}

'''Good Korea''' (or combined as one word is [[Gorea]]) is an American colony much like Puerto Rico. This is not ironic or in any way in line with ED, it's a just a fact missing from Wikipedia: South Korea is no more sovereign than Puerto Rico. Their army is directly under command of the American Army and their first president was an American Hawaiian military dictator.
Good Korea was one of the [[United States]]' 20th century acquisitions in accordance with the long-term [[Manifest Destiny]].

== Geography ==

Good Korea is immediately south of [[Best Korea]], on the bottom half of a peninsula that is west of [[Japan]]. It has water on both sides. It is a very convenient place for throwing things into [[Best Korea]]. It used to have some good surf beaches, but now they are rather untidy.

== People ==

[[Image:RaelKoreanBlackface.jpg|thumb|Sometimes uppity Koreans show support for the [[niggers]]]]
[[Image:SK military.jpg|thumb|Capitalist, why don't you feed your people?]]

South Koreans belong to a Conservative culture which respects traditional values. The typical South Korean belongs to some or another shady Baptist Church founded in California in the 50s. Since both men and women work long hours for one or another service corporation, and [[nazi|there are no immigrants]], they have more Mc Donalds per capita than any other country in the World, so they can enjoy their traditional food at any time prepared by robots. A dog market exists in Seoul to entertain tourists and help Animal Rights organizations whitewash money. South Korean men like to play golf in their spare time and get drunk with Single Malt Scotch, their traditional spirit. South Korean women like to repeatedly get plastic surgery in their eyelids. Children pass times include math, Starcraft, and studying English to purge themselves of their mother tongue before they are six. Korean girls have become ruthless [[feminist]] gold diggers who will only use the men for money then leave them to die off once they have outlived their usefulness. But despite being feminists Korean women crave the slightly bigger White cock or the [[lie|giant]] [[The Great Black Dick Hoax|Black Cock]] and are completely submissive to [[White]] and Black men.
{{center|{{frame|<youtube>Lf_sEGjC9_4</youtube><center>'''Typical Korean [[Christians]] harass people in public, and are often known as [[gay|gae]][[dog|doks.]]'''</center>}}}}
[[Image:halkas.jpg|thumb|Typical korean [[granny]]]]
[[Image:Dongduk.jpg|thumb|Typical Korean Feminists' Protest Method]]

== Government ==

Good Korea is a suzerain state of the USA, kind of an unincorporated territory. Every five years a new Governor is appointed by the United States Pacific Command. A Reality Show is broadcasted and fake elections are held in a farcical show of moral superiority to the People's Republic of Korea. The subjects are expected to pay for and take part in these celebrations.
Basic freedom of speech or demonstration are forbidden in Good Korea when it touches on political topics: the internalization of this prohibition into self-censorship is what makes them good in the first place.

== Occultism ==

South Korea's first female president and former symbolic first lady [[Wikipedia:Park Geun-hye|Park Geun-Hye]], who won the election through military interference, <s>is under [[Truth|investigation]]</s> [https://www.straitstimes.com/asia/east-asia/south-korea-ex-president-park-geun-hye-leaves-jail-for-medical-care LOL the capricious prostitute got 24 years] for conducting occult rituals and being linked to fortune teller [[Wikipedia:Choi Soon-sil|Choi Soon-sil]], her "shaman adviser" and rumored [[lesbian]] confidante who has been in Park's inner circle since 1994. Choi's father was the shamanistic cult leader [[Wikipedia:Choi Tae-min|Choi Tae-min]] of the Eternal World Religion, who told Park he could channel her dead mother [[Wikipedia:Yuk Young-soo|Yuk Young-soo]], who was assassinated in 1974 by a [[North Korea]]n sympathizer trying to shoot Park's father, South Korean military dictator [[Wikipedia:Park Chung-hee|Park Chung-hee]], who was assassinated in 1979 by the director of his security agency for failing to keep Choi away from his daughter Geun-Hye. From an office in the Non-Hyun [[Dong]] neighborhood, spirits told Choi Soon-sil that North Korea would soon collapse, Choi rewrote Park's speeches to be more shaman-y, she created some corrupt foundations, and Choi had a tablet with secret policy documents on it. On [[Halloween]] 2016, Choi Soon-sil said "I'm sorry. I committed a sin that deserves death." Park Geun-Hye said "it is not true that I am a cult follower and practised shamanistic rituals at the presidential Blue House." '''[[You]]''' can't make this shit up. Stick to [[Starcraft]] and [[Dota2]] South Korea. Currently, after Park Geun-hye, the worst president, [[Wikipedia:Moon Jae-in|Moon Jae-in]]{{Communist}}, the worst anti-American president, \politics like shit. The nickname in Korea is Moon Apocalypse. However, there is hope because all Koreans, With the exception of Moon Jae-in's fanatical supporters, most Koreans hate Moon Jae-in and the Korean opposition party, Power of the People, is in power. After 2022, [[Yoon Suk Yeol]] replaced the regime. After Yoon Suk Yeol was impeached, as of 2026, the president is Lee Jae-myung{{Communist}}.

[[Image:Leejaiming.jpg|thumb|As of 2026, the president of Korea is a puppet of China.]]

== Economy ==

You can make a lotta lotta money in Good Korea. Make sure your mutual funds and IRAs include Good Korean companies. If you can't get a job where you are despite owning a suit, you can be a highly paid English-speaking [[monkey]] to entertain their small children ([https://youtu.be/dXakC04KFz0?t=1391 but only if you're white]). Many Good Koreans might be confused because [[white people]] (like Alan Alda and Jamie Farr) look good in movies and [[you]] don't. But don't worry! They will never fire you no matter how fat, gross, diseased, and lazy you are. And don't forget, although [[Raelian|Raël]] may be [[Perma-ban|banned]] in Korea, he still needs your 10 percent.

Internationally, Good Korea releases [[MMORPG]]s for free, which are usually awful, even by MMORPG standards. Kids will actually pay for extra, useless features on this shit, which will normally make their character look more like a [[fag]] or [[weeaboo]]. The profit Good Korea makes on this faggotry is uncertain, though it could be over 20% of their economy.

[[Image:Japracist.jpg|thumb|Unlike [[Japan|this]] sign, this only exists in Japan and Taiwan.]]

Gorea is trying to take over the world by making and releasing free shitty gay TV Drama + K-poop featuring post-plastic-surgery pretty boys and girls, but no one gave a shit except for a few pathetic [[Koreaboo]]s in South East Asia.

==US Military in Good Korea==
If you are serving in the military, please take advantage of the many prostitutes that populate the red light district. <s>Remember, though: Koreans hate any and all United States soldiers, so avoid asking questions, unless you would like to contribute to the Korean national pastime (other than ''Starcraft''): Blankly staring and giggling.</s>

but after 2015 Now, thanks to the atrocities of China, I like the US and the US military.

Good Koreans are famously hard workers.

It is a known fact that [[Cho Seung-Hui|a Korean cannot kill more than 33 people without killing him or herself.]]

== How to Troll Good Korea ==
* Tell them Korea owes all its Jew to their Japanese Masters.
* Call kimchi a kimuchi.
* Call anyone with [KOR] or [KR] in their IGNs a Kimchiman.
* Describe their country as a big factory
* Congratulate them on being the country that produces and consumes more steel per capita in the World! Segway casually to suicide rates.
* Point out that North Koreans don't have as many prostitute daughters and gamer and asperger sons because they are free to get daily fresh air, community exercise and don't live in a steel and concrete digital sweatshop.
* Point out that eating dog is a disgusting habit not merited by culture since North Koreans would rather starve than eat dog.
* [[shit nobody cares about|Tell them Dokdo belongs to japan.]]
* Make fun of ''Starcraft'' or any of the shitty MMORPGs or MMOFPS they dedicate their worthless lives on.
** Say that worker rushing sucks and only shows that they have a small dick.
* Tell them [[your mom|comfort women]] did 9/11.
* Tell them [[fact|Japan is better]].
* Tell them that their country has a rich, long history of being buttraped and under the control of other countries to such an extent that they have no distinct individual culture.
* Say hello to them on the streets. This will cause them to lock up into a giggling fit of fear.
* [[Fan death|Lock them in a room with a fan turned on because they seriously believe that stupid shit]].
* Be [[Kim Jong Il]].
* Remind them that a lot more so than Japan, South Korea is now America's bitch.
* Remind them that the only sovereign Korean country with its armed forces not directly under the command of a foreign power is the ''Democratic'' ''People's'' Republic of Korea, not their slave puppet state. If they don't remember tell them to just [http://www.globalresearch.ca/south-koreas-armed-forces-to-remain-fully-under-us-military-command/5410849 look it up]
* To add insult to injury, remind them that whereas Japan at least put up a fight before becoming America's butt buddy, South Korea bent over willingly to let America rape them.
** If they do it willingly, it's not rape. Then they're just being fags.
* Tell them that they're the only country in the world where going to the military for 2 years is the only way to become a man. Extra lulz if you mention that most of the time there is spent sucking their CO's cocks and doing their chores while they get $100 a month.
* For more lulz, mistake them for [[japs]].
* Inform an older Korean man that yes, there are gay Koreans.
* Tell them their national soccer team is shitty.
* Convince people Samsung is a Japanese company.
* Remind them that all their good looking women are a product of extensive plastic surgery.

== gallary ==

{{cg|South korea|Gallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Ugly south korean.png|thumb|Good Korea has to Face it: Their [[wimminz]] are ugly
File:Koreanfeminazi.jpg|thumb|Typical korean [[feminazi]] lulz
File:Typicalkoreafemi.jpg|typical [[korean]] feminazi 2
Image:856653883_e0b6ce3eef_o.jpg|thumb|300px|A typical pub in South Korea. Absolutely NOT related to the flag of Korea
Image:sweatshop.jpg|thumb|<s>Good Koreans are famously hard workers. This boy likes his job so much he'll work for less than a cent an hour!!</s> It's China
Image:Boiled alive dogs asians.jpg|thumb|Another reason why south Korea is inferior to [[North Korea|best one]]
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:ChineseCarryOut.jpg|Ancient traditional korean method of [[child abuse|transportation]]
Image:Koreanoparty.jpg|thumb|Looks like no one stuck around to clean up after the party
File:South korean ilustrator kidmos art .jpg|thumb|Korean [[Hentai]]
</gallery>}} 

== See also ==

* [[Johnny Somali]]
* [[Korean]] <s>stereotypes</s> [[fact|FACTS]]
* [[Sarah Jeong]]
* [[PSY]]
* [[Yoon Suk Yeol]]
* [[Squid Game]]
* [[BTS]]
* [[K-pop]]
* [[Chan Ho Park]]
* [[Woo Bum-kon]]
* [[Chan Ho Park|Park Chan Ho]]
* [[Cho Seung Hui]]

== External links ==

* [http://www.unwiredview.com/2012/04/20/south-korea-to-ban-cameraphone-shutter-sound-removers/# An example of the moral-faggotry endemic to South Korea.]
* [https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2023/5/17/pig-heads-bbqs-mosque-backlash-tests-s-korea-religious-freedom/# South koreans know how to handle sand nigger.]

== Korean evaluation ==

It's a little exaggerated, but some of it was funny lol.

{{Politics}}
{{Commonwealth}}
{{azn}}
{{Korea}}
{{timeline|Featured article December 28 & 29, [[2024]]|[[Ryan's World]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Hawk Tuah]]}}
[[Category:Countries]]

Korea

2026-05-15T10:24:53Z

Gooksu: /* Background */

{{offended}}
{{notice|S/Korea just Declared Martial Law !1!!}}
==Background==
[[Image:Koreanzerglings.jpg|thumb|left|ZERG RUSH!]]
[[File:Ahotkoreanman.jpg|thumb|left|A typical korean man]]
Once upon a time, Japan [[Surprise Sex|surprise buttsexed]] China, and '''''KOREA''''' is the prolapsed colon that resulted. During [[100 years ago|the 1950s]] Korea was the site of some epic [[RL drama]], when [[Lulz|war]] broke out between the North and South due to a lack of good ''[[Starcraft]]'' and ''[[League of Legends]]'' servers. After repeated [[Rape|defeats]], the South asked the [[America]]ns for help, in response the Americans and pretty much the rest of the world proceeded to [[Pwn|invade and drive back]] the North all the way to the Chinese border. However, more drama was to be begotten when paranoid [[chink]] commies, most armed with little more than their microscopic ding dongs, went apeshit and launched a surprise [[Raid|offensive]] on the UN armies, who, after some serious anal raping, then agreed to a [[GG|ceasefire]]. The [[Korean War]] initiated the proud American tradition of [[Freedom|bombing the shit out of other countries in order to save them]], and introduced the world to the noble Chinese tradition of rounding up a bunch of illiterate [[Mexicans|peasant]]s, giving them a couple of twigs, and forcing them into heroic, [[an hero|suicidal]] "[[Zerg rush|human wave]]" attacks. The border of North and South Korea hasn't changed since, with both sides engaging in a [[flame war|stand-off]].

There are a few Koreans in Japan, and the Japanese there, practicing exceedingly high standards concerning racial purity, treat them as [[niggers]].Also, the chasm between Western and Eastern part of Korea is high, as they try not to taint their royal [[Azn]] blood with niggers, white devils, or other Azns in Korea.

==Foods/Customs==

Korean dishes include boiled grasses, leaves, boiled dogs, boiled cows; anything that is boiled and cooked with red-pepper can be Korean. While some love Korean food, typical Korean dish, which consists of Kimchi, Radish-Kimchi, White-Kimchi, more Kimchi, and rice, is not edible to humans, except for maybe hungry people that live in Africa. The legend actually has it that koreans drip kimchi when they bleed.

Koreans have very odd custom of calling anyone older "hyung/oppa/nuna", which means older brother or older sister. As a result, in many case of Korean relationships, people say "my sister/brother" when they are having sex, which kind of explains why Japs(that came from Koreans) are obsessed with incest hentai. But Koreans don't have to do that since Korean couples engage in daily incest role play. Due to possible broken DNA resulting from incestuous relationships, we can still confirm that Koreans are very proud of their Korean heritage(which probably consists of copying other heritages.)

Most of the students in Korea are virgins, preparing to become great honorary [[Azn]] wizard. Their sports of choice include memorizing useless crap, watching K-pop when they are not sleeping, watching Japanese porn and hating Japs at possibly at the same time, and masturbating with their well plagiarized achievements. Although Koreans naturally suck at sports, they are better than any other ethnicity at talking about sports.

Recently Korean government banned pornography because Korean women could not stand the sight of women online that had bigger boobs and asses than them,(which is practically everyone in the world); however, Korean virgin males did not react because they were shamed of having [[Azn]] dicks.

Korean men like to brag about mandatory military service, which can best be likened to Auschwitz, except that it is worse because you would have to see Korean fags talk all day about K-pop and eat kimchi all day. Historians claim that faggotry practiced among Koreans stem from long history of slavery.(No, this is actually serious, slaves made up 50% of the population in the last Chosun dynasty of Korea). Naturally, Koreans are [[nigger]] asians; however, particular faggotry is practiced only among Korean themselves because people from other race actually stand up for themselves and beat the shit out of anyone who does it.

In their long shitty history, (imagine the never-ending series of [[sharknado]] movies), there have been no Korean historical figures that influenced the world in a positive manner; however, King Sejong and Lee-Soon-Shin are famous to test-makers in the US for making frequent appearances in the essay section of the SAT. Believe it or not, some conspiracy theories claim that [[Hitler]] had a Korean ancestry.

== Simplified ==
[[File:Koreanbaby.jpg|thumb|right|A typical Korean child can go through a litter during a picnic]]
[[File:Bestkorea.jpg|thumb|right|[[Pokemon|NORTH KOREA IS BEST KOREA!]]]]
[[Best Korea|North Korea]]: The pimps with the nukes. 
[[Good Korea|South Korea]]: The players with the shitty tech.
[[File:KoreanBDSMWhore.jpg|thumb|right|Americans brutally tortured Korean Civilians during the Korea War in both Koreas]]

According to [[Conservative|Samuel Huntington]] the whole idea is for Good Korea to inherit Evil Korea's Nukes after they all starve, thus joining the Nuclear Club, guilt-free.

== How to Troll a Korean ==
[[Image:chop.jpg|thumb|An actual Korean reaction to Takeshima related issues.]]
[[Image:Korean.jpg|thumb|The only sport Koreans give a shit about is [[Starcraft]].]]
# Say ''anything'' good about Japan at all. [[Seriously]], try it; it works. For more lulz, "mistake" them for Japanese: enjoy the effects.
# Go around saying that Koreans originate from Southeast Asia, like this [http://www.youtube.com/user/SouthEastAsianUnion/ gook], and all the studies done in major universities are all [[lulz|lulz]].
# Buy a Korean girl a fake designer purse (make sure it is a good fake, they have a sense that allows them to be able to sniff out all but the best fakes), have sex with her (should be no problem once she thinks you bought her something expensive with some French or Italian guy's name on it), then reveal to her that the purse is a fake that you bought off some Nigerian guy at a flea market for $10 and watch as her head implodes with rage.
# Say "Dokdo (Takeshima for more lulz) belongs to Japan!" This is guaranteed to send any Korean into an epic rage. An EPIC, EPIC RAGE.
# Explain to them how wonderful the Kim dynasty is, then ask their opinion on the family.
# Tell them that most Korean words come from China.
# Ask them how many times Korea has been invaded.
# Call them "gook," "chink," "Chinese," or "panface." (Obviously this is not trolling. Koreans will become [[Cho Seung Hui]])
# Tell a Korean girl she'd look so much better with an eye job.
# Tell them about your trip to Asia, and make sure to say that the Korean whores were the best.
# Tell a Korean man that your girlfriend is Korean.
# Ask if dog tastes good.
# Inform a Korean man that usually, when a Korean girl goes to college she can't get enough nigger dick.
# Tell a Korean man that his wife wasn't a virgin, she had hymen replacement surgery. Say that she was your girlfriend, during which time you fucked her as much as possible, and he's lucky to have such a sweet piece of ass.
# Tell them that Japanese is an infinitely more beautiful language than Korean.
# Tell them how Korea has [[truth|spent its entire history being the bitch of either China, Japan, or the USA]].
# Talk to them in Japanese and expect them to understand you completely.

Be careful; they often carry knives.

== Fun Facts ==
[[Image:Ugly south korean.png|thumb|right|300px|North Korean propaganda, but has immense troll value nonetheless.]]
* All Koreans have hardons for ''[[Starcraft]]''.
* Korean believe they are the best Asians, just like the Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese, Taiwanese- Oh FUCK it, [[Fact|all Asians are retarded]]. Except for the [[Philippines|Filipinos]], who make themselves everyone's bitch.
* All Koreans are extremely susceptible to unquestioning belief in urban myths and old wives tales; in modern times those backed by email chain letters or Korean news rather than any actual scientific evidence are particularly dangerous when released upon unsuspecting Koreans. A favorite is that eating dog will transform your vocal chords into those of an opera singer. Also, see [[fan death]].
* Koreans are actually aliens from the planet of Korethra. Your base ours is now.
*[[Incest|99% of Koreans bear the surname "Kim," "Lee," or "Park."]]
*one good example of someone with the surname kim is the hot kim tae hee , someone with lee is the hot lee ha nui or someone with pak is pak chae rim
* King Dong Dil, leader of North Korea, is actually a [[robot]].
* [[Korean cry|Korean tears]] are chemically unrelated to tears from any other ethnic group on the planet.
* Everything that goes wrong in Korea is the Japan's fault. If you insult or complain about Korea, you must be Japanese. No exceptions. Just ask the gooks.

== Typical Response to an American ==
# Yankee Go Home!
# [[I'M X|I'M KOREAN]]! SON OF A BITCH AMERICAN! AMERICAN IS PIG! DO YOU WANT CHEESEBURGER? DO YOU WANT PIZZA? AMERICAN IS PIG DISGUSTING! BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA IS MURDERER! FUCKING U.S.A!!!!1
# Your beef tastes like dog turds in glue.
# You mean nothing to us...except for Blizzard.
# KKKKIIILLLL NNNNOOOORRRRTTTTHHH KOOORREEEAAAAA
# But After the 2010s, South Korean sentiment toward the United States has come to favor the United States, with the exception of a few anti-Americans.

<center>[[Image:Boiled alive dogs asians.jpg|thumb|center|600px|Fun fact: koreans love dog meat, hell, [[DO IT FAGGOT|you can even taste one in a korean restaurant!]]]]</center>

== Brutally True Facts About Koreans ==
[[File:Average Penis Size Throughout the World.jpg|thumb|Korean men have the smallest dicks in the world]]
# They [[Fact|smell.]]
# North Koreans are mind-fucked and think their country is full of purity thanks to their grorious reader.
# Lower-class Koreans are extremely hot-headed, any words that sounds like an insult towards them and they will punch you in the face with no remorse.
# Koreans are either people that are mentioned above, or SAT nerds with giant glasses and loads of SAT-prep books stacking in their room just so they can try and get into Harvard, but usually end up going to some school for rich Korean failures like Bucknell.
# Koreans eat dogs. They really do, and they really don't like to talk about it.
# The Koreans are the only race on the planet that are both more xenophobic and materialistic than the [[Jews]].
# Koreans think they are tough shit and are better than Americans, but the sad truth is if it wasn't for [[America]] saving their sorry asses back in Korean War, the entire peninsula will be buttraped by the [[Best Korea|grorious reader]]. America is still saving their asses by patrolling the DMZ. If it weren't for the U.S., South Korea would belong to Kim Jong-Il.
# Koreans think [[Fact|their history consists of 5,000 years, but 95% of it are lies]].
# They come to America and/or the Philippines for education, because [[Fact|Korean universities are hellholes of suicide epidemics.]]
# Koreans look down on any non-Koreans just because they are Koreans.
# Every individual Korean must stay within 30 feet of another Korean, for if one doesn't stay close enough to another for a day, he will slowly rot to the ground.
# The term "Gold Digger" is actually derived from the first Empress of Korea named Queen Geul Dik-geon, who would only ovulate after her lover, the first Emperor of Korea, spent well over the equivalent of modern $100 million USD on designer hand bags, shoes, and plastic surgery for her. The pair went on to father the Korean people, with this trait still being seen today in all Korean women.
# Koreans actually believe Japanese Samurai originated from Korean [[Bullshit|Samurang]].
# On the rare occasion a Korean immigrant converses with someone of a different ethnicity, they'll go on and on about how great their home country is, despite having jumped at the chance to move to the nation they currently live in.
# [[Kpop]] is used to hide their country's truth, just to only get their attention and its good images. They get so butthurt whenever someone (doesn't need to be anti-sentimental or so) exposes them into complete misery.
# Their education is consistent of Hangul, and about the fucking island of Dokdo (Oh scratch that, Dokdo isn't even their land! LOL, it was Takeshima!)
# Many Koreans, especially the ones in America, are hard-core evangelical Christians, and will openly discuss religion anywhere, anytime. Do not be surprised if a Korean sitting next to you on the bus asks you if you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. If you say, "no," he will proceed to give you a sermon, telling you that you will certainly go to hell. If you try to get away from him, he will follow you.
# You should be glad you're not a [[Good Korea|South Korean]] citizen, because all male citizens are required to serve 2 years in the military, which is basically worthless since they're gonna suck America's cock for help again once there is a war. Most of their time is spent sucking their CO's cocks to not get beaten up and <s>pulling out weeds with their bare hands while they're paid $100 a month to do so</s> [[Shit nobody cares about|As of 2026, a soldier's monthly salary is 1000 dollars]], which just shows that they're only meat shields to buy time for good old 'Murican freedom where the women are exempt from this meaningless conscription.
# Be cautious of any Koreans near you, [[Cho Seung-Hui|for one of them might want to go for a high score and blow up a college near you]].
# Any game from [[Starcraft|Blizzard]], [[League Of Legends|Riot]], or Nexon is just like oxygen for the Koreans, for if they stop playing it, they will die; [[World of Warcraft|they're much more important than their babies]].
# Koreans think their culture is unique, but it's basically a rip-off mix between [[Japan]] and [[China]].
# [[Fact|Koreans are much uglier and their eyes are much slantier]] than their [[Azn|Asian]] neighbors, that's why plastic surgery is so popular in Korea. Their faces are also flat, which is why they are called "panfaces."
# Every student who graduates each term, will receive a plastic surgery, because their panfaces deshape at least each year.
# No one gives a shit about Koreans (except for Koreans themselves of course, and the few, pathetic [[koreaboo|Koreaboos]]).
# Unlike other Asians who move to the US and become [[Yuppies]] (China) and [[Hipsters]] (Japan), Koreans tend to turn into gun-toting [[rednecks]].
# In [[Good Korea|South Korea]], people only purchase products from Korean brands (e.g. Samsung, Hyundai etc.). Purchasing anything from foreign brands will result in buttrape because people will think you're not supporting Korea.
# All Koreans are stalkers.
# If you think any of the above is false and are attempting to delete them, then you must be or at least partially Korean, because frankly non-Koreans never liked Koreans and always assumed they are the rudest and most pathetic group of people ever lived on Earth; and only Koreans think of themselves as pure and sinless.
# Koreans often are confused whether people are complimenting or insulting them. As a result, they resort to faggotry and act like dumbasses.
# Because their parents make them study constantly during childhood and adolescence, Koreans have no social skills and are extremely awkward around anyone who isn't Korean.
# There is always a Korean table in the dining hall of any major university. They do not mix with outsiders.
# They're rude, emotionally retarded, and reek of kim chee, garlic, and anchovies. Since they have panfaces, the average Korean male's face is frozen in an expression of unwarranted disdain.
# Korean women will stab to death their entire families for just a mere whiff of some white cock.
# They have nothing of their own. No tradition, but just copying others for the lulz and claiming it as a Korean invention.
# Had to invent the [[mukbang]] because half the population are friendless [[loser]]s.

==Korean Videos==
Most of them are shit nobody cares about, like Kim Jong-Il's penis size or [[Gay|faburous Korean history]], and the rikes. Enjoy these videos brought to you by the '''Korean Intelligence Agency'''.
{|style="margin:0 auto"
|{{frame|{{videoframe|koreavideos|background-color:#a5a5a5|font-weight:bold
|<youtube>m_-PIpYpIfQ</youtube> <center>'''The Korean National Anthem.'''</center>
|<youtube>Ptyzc4BQliY</youtube> <center></center>
|<youtube>xXxvsShaAoA</youtube> <center></center>
|<youtube>9bZkp7q19f0</youtube> <center>'''This is what Gay Korea is best known for.'''</center>}}|border=#a5a5a5|background=#a5a5a5}}
|}
==Famous Gooks==
* [[Cho Seung Hui]]
* [[Kim il sung]]
* [[Kim Jong Il]]
* [[Chan Ho Park|Park Chan Ho]]
* [[The Hipster Grifter]]
*The Gangnam Style Guy with the shitty dance moves

== See Also ==
*[[Japan]]
*[[Good Korea]]
*[[Best Korea]]
*[[China]]
*[[Asian]]
*[[Communism]]
*[[Homefront]]

== External Links ==

* [http://blog.empas.com/wwjang/list.html?c=1929499&v=content Korean crap]

{{race}}

{{Korea}}

{{4chanarchive|24618024|I'M KOREAN}}

{{commonwealth}}

[[Category: Locations]]

League of Legends

2026-05-15T10:23:58Z

Gooksu: /* Related Articles */

{{spoiler|THIS GAME IS FILLED WITH FAGGOTS AND CRYBABIES & [https://twitter.com/MiniWhiteRabbit/status/1026923233281421312 RIOT EMPLOYEES ARE RAPING THEIR FEMALE CO-WORKERS]}}

{{breakingnews|The CaitVi sex scene leaks were real! [[/co/|Co]] was actually right for once!}}

[[File:League of faggots.png|center]]
 
[[File:Leaguetards.jpg|thumb]]
"'League of Losers"' (LoL) is a time-wasting simulator of the "Aeon of Strife Styled Fortress Assault Game Going On Two Sides" ('''A.S.S.F.A.G.G.O.T.S.''') genre, though casualfags also call it MOBA.

Imagine a bizarre one-night stand between a drunken [[World of Warcraft]] and a sopping wet [[DotA]]. The result of such anal play is '''League of Legends''', a festering anal wart that will haunt "Guinsoo" and "Pendragon" to their graves. It is essentially a "polished", but also casualized version of DotA, without the gold loss on death and the "denying" (killing your own minions like a spastic retard to deny the enemy gold).

LoL was created by Riot Games, a group of DotA [[fans]] from around the world eager to achieve goals such as pioneering the game genre [[Bullshit|Multiplayer Online Battle Arena]] and enforcing nonsensical SJW-standards upon millions of hyper-aggressive players. The company itself is owned in part by Tencent, an evil Chinese organization hell-bent on conquering the Western market.

Fortunately, some new deep gameplay mechanics have been introduced to enhance the overall experience. If you have "Flash" in your spell slot, for example, you'll rape your enemies in the ass every time you use it, making the game truly [[shit|fun]] and [[rage|entertaining]] to play.
= Getting Started =

<center>[[image:RiotFails.png|Vegeta! What does the scouter say about the login queue?!]]</center>

<center>Here are some sweet fucking things you can do in League of Legends:</center>

• Download it, play it and uninstall it '''FOR FREE'''!

• Wait for the installer to patch the game for up to '''ONE HOUR''', just because you didn't get the newest blonde weeaboo-lazer champion skinpack.

• Participate in games ranging from 25 minutes to '''MORE THAN AN HOUR'''! Enemy team got ya down? Getting fisted right to the shoulder? The client ties your account's ID to every game you join so if you try to quit and play another, '''YOU GO RIGHT BACK TO IT'''! Want to surrender? Too bad, the 2/19/4 Ashe and her 1/15/2 Malphite pub buddy won't hear of it!

• Use points you earn in games to purchase new champions! Don't even think about saving up for skins 'cause you have to buy '''RRRRRRIOT POINTS''' for that! Cunts!

• Level up through the ranks! Invest points in talents! Purchase an empty rune page for twice the cost of most champions! Agonize over your poorly organized rune tree! Buy the extra super-flashy emote that annoys both teams, because that's the '''ONLY REASON''' you aren't winning at your skill level!

• Purchase champions from the store and pick from ten free ones '''EVERY WEEK'''! But seriously, you and I both know you will suck at any one you pick. This is the game Koreans play with one hand and punish the slightest error with total e-rape; forcing you to focus your energy on a single champion to become good. Then a day comes where, by the wind of luck, you will '''TOTALLY FUCKING PWN'''. Waves of monsters will fall at your feet. Enemy heroes will quiver in fright and your allies will tongue your testicles. However, this surge of e-peen will melt to a string of losses and butthurt as you try to explain zero assists and constant feeding. Yeah, I'm sure that build got you a legendary streak last game. Maybe you should stick to playing against AI bots and phone us when you're ready for some teamwork.

• ''Play the new champion!'' Every few weeks Riot introduces a grotesquely overpowered new champion which their demographic will purchase with daddy's credit card so they can EPICALLY PWN SUM NOOBS!!!! As soon as the next gamebreakingly OP champion is released, the prior champion will be nerfed into unplayability.

• '''GET ADDICTED!''' League of Legends has all the enticing elements of WoW! Collect enough gold to buy the black phallus you've been eying! Shit the same ball of magic on the same goddamn monster for the fucking thousandth time! Masturbate over one character and die inside when the Infinity Edge you farmed for vanishes at game's end! Now you can have the life sucked out of you in thirty minutes or less, '''GUARANTEED!'''

• ''Kill yourself'' when everyone flashes everywhere evading all [[Unwarranted self-importance|your well-placed skillshots]].

[[image:Attention green.svg.png|30px]] '''PROTIP:''' Just choose the stupid default runes that fit the champ, because why bother wasting time setting up a retarded skill tree to get a free cookie?! In the end all you want as a caster, for example, is the stupid homing ball that kills a guy shortly after he thinks he's safe.

== In-Game Currencies ==

Paying for stuff is split into two main currencies: Riot Points ($$$) and Blue Essence (free aka grinding forever). While the game is not technically pay-to-win, the vast majority of the roster is locked from the start. Thus, new players get to choose between either shelling out real cash or grinding dozens of games just to try out a champion. The skins are another interesting point, as some of them make it harder to see the hitboxes for spells. Some skins are even banned in tournament play, but of course they're all allowed in ranked. Skins can technically be obtained by grinding, but unlike champions it's pretty much random which skins you get, so this can be considered a pay-to-win aspect.

• '''Riot Points''' are bought with real money. They'll get you anything that can be earned by grinding, as well as worthless XP and Blue Essence boosts which only smurfs leveling up new accounts will ever care about. If you're a fucking retard, you pay for the Riot Points. The other way of getting them is to just wait for a Christmas to pass by or a huge server crash. You'll then get a small amount of RP and you can at least afford one or two skins sooner or later (if you're stupid enough to play for that long).

• '''Blue Essence''', formerly known as Influence Points, can be earned by grinding account levels or selling champion shards you don't want. You'll mainly use it for getting new broken hero--I mean "CHAMPIONS" (which are completely overpriced). You can also spend it on blank rune pages, or the overpriced mastery badges (have fun grinding enough S ranks for that).

• '''Orange Essence''' is a "bonus" currency, which can be obtained via the obligatory lootbox hunt. It can be combined with other lootbox crap to unlock worthless skin shards for champions you probably don't even own. You're better off converting shards into random permanent skins, rather than collecting the thousands of Orange Essence required to get one decent skin.

• '''Mythical Essence''' is ANOTHER "bonus" currency, which can be obtained by opening lootboxes and grinding levels. It serves as a replacement for random purple gems. You can purchase skin shards or (ridiculously overpriced) super rare skins with gold armor & other vanity junk with it. Nothing really changed compared to gems, it's just more in your face now and only serves to confuse new players.

[[image:Attention green.svg.png|30px]] '''PROTIP:''' Since this game is such a disgusting grindfest, your best bet for obtaining a decent amount of champions is to only unlock them via the loot shards, as those have a reduced cost compared to the shop. The downside of this is that you have to rely on luck to get the shards you want.

== Lore ==

<center><youtube>ebJR2lBZsOc</youtube></center>
<center>'''The answer to the question nobody asked'''</center>

The genius writers at Riot thought it's a good idea to put some background story into the game. They're a bunch of WarCraft / Warhammer 40K wannabes. Nobody gives a fuck though, since most players are only interested in banning other players or blaming their teammates for being total fuckwits. They even had a newspaper coming out monthly until Riot figured out that nobody reads their trashy stories and stopped it.

{|width=100% border=3px
|colspan=6 align=center|'''Nobody who has an ounce of sanity left actually gives a shit about the lore'''
|-
|align=center|> Click here <
|}
<div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed" id="mw-customcollapsible-list">
 
• '''[[warcraft|Runeterra]]'''

Generic high fantasy world. You know, Earth, the typical fantasy world, but most likely Azeroth since this game shares the same bland ideas with World of Warcraft.

• '''Demacia'''

Generic fantasy good guy faction. Demacians do everything that [[Dumbass|lawful good]] people consider light and justice. Their official language is nothing but shouting the word "DEMACIA"!!!

• '''Noxus'''

Generic totalitarian bad guy faction. The land of badass sadists and the always chaotic evil empire.

• '''Ionia'''

The typical land of [[weeaboo]] fanfaggotry. Your typical Asian weeaboo culture with daily Mortal Kombat tournaments. Currently getting pwned by Noxus, HARD.
[[image:Taricthegayeldritchabomination.jpg|thumb|YOU STEPPED INTO THE WRONG NEIGHBOURHOOD, MOTHERFUCKER]]
• '''Yordles'''

A bunch of furfags and smurfs. 100% of the population falls into one of these categories. Some are even weebs. Most of them live in Bandle City, which is essentially furfag heaven.

• '''The Void'''

The WarCraft Outlands 2.0. A place where Zerg- and Tyranid-wannabe creatures come from. You'll most likely be raped by tentacles if you enter.

• '''Zaun'''

A technologically advanced grimdark city inhabited by steampunk technophiles. Your typical air polluted city, just like the common human cites in WH40K which Riot obviously stole from. They are evil because they side with Noxus, hurrdurrhurr.

• '''Piltover'''

Technologically advanced brightlight city inhabited by apple tech hippies and furfags from Yordle. The complete opposite version of Zaun. They are good guys because they are allies with Demacia. They're also a bunch of furfags because they are allies with Yordles.

• '''Freljord'''

Generic icy wasteland filled with barbarians and hot bitches that will freeze your cock off. Tryndamere is currently the pimp master of this shit hole.

• '''Mount Targon'''

A phallic mountain that "pierces into the stars". Also home to [[ADHD|Percy Jackson]] wannabes.

</div>

 
 

[[image:Attention green.svg.png|30px]] '''PROTIP:''' As you can see this game is highly original. '''DO NOT STEAL >:('''

== Game Modes ==

<center>[[File:League of Legends - Gamemodes.jpg‎]]</center>

=== Perennial Modes ===

• '''Classic''' - The only mode anyone plays with the ONLY map anyone plays: "SUMMONER'S RIFT". A fucking three lane map that you see in every other DotA clone. Five players on each side try to flame shit out of each other until one side either surrenders at 20 minutes or keeps on crying how one their junglers fed the other team. This can normally go on for approximately 30 or (if you're unlucky) 45+ minutes. If you are up to it, you can play a mode called "Ranked". It's the same as classic, except it's full of 12 year olds that will munch your dick off if you do anything wrong.
[[image:Summoner'sRift.jpg‎|thumb|right]]

• '''ARAM''' - Stands for "All Random All Mid". All players fight with random champions on a single lane on an icy bridge. You can't buy shit as soon as you leave the base. This mode serves for those people who are too stupid to play regular League of Legends. "Fun" for about 10 minutes, then you just want to shut it off and rethink the purpose of your life.

• '''Teamfight Tactics''' - A clone of "Auto Chess" from DotA. You collect a bunch of champs, upgrade them, give them items and then you watch them fight. About as exciting as watching paint dry. A lot of players only start it up so they can farm free emotes for the main game, then go AFK. In 2021 it received a "fast mode", which is even more dumbed down - to the point that you don't even have to manage your gold and level anymore.

• '''Co-op vs. AI''' - You and your one-man-clan friends play against bots to test out new item builds, hurrdurrhurrr. You can't even play this mode offline. The only noteworthy point of this mode is that "intro" level AI games are the best place to run account leveling tools. Since most of your games will be with other botters and against the AI, there won't be anyone to report you. The other levels are more likely to contain real humans who will report you, and they don't even give extra XP compared to intro level - totally pointless.

• '''Custom''' - Before ARAMs became an official game mode, they would be held here in the middle of the tutorial map. It also used to be useful for quickly testing stuff, but the new practice tool obsoletes that, too. Nowadays, the custom mode is only used for tournaments.

• '''Tutorials''' - If League really is your first overhead view game and you REALLY need to use these to figure out how to move your character, you have a sad empty future ahead of you. Just end it here, right now. It's for the greater good.

=== Featured Modes ===

When the game reaches new lows of boredom and terrible balance, and even LoL's base of addicts and children are losing interest, you'll notice one of these modes show up in the client for a while.

• '''[[Party hard|Ultra rapid fire]]''' - A mode that gives you infinite mana and energy, 80% cooldown reduction and increased movespeed, attack speed, etc. The only fun way to play League post-2011, as anyone can fulfill their fantasies of spamming any champion's abilities until their fingers rot and fall off.

• '''All Random Ultra Rapid Fire''' - ARURF, which sounds like a furry mating call, is the worst thing that happened to League of Losers since the automatic ban system. Riot took the one mode that had any entertainment value and decided to force random champs into it. Constant quitting, both in the lobby and in-game, is the norm. Nobody actually enjoys this mode; most people just play it to farm event points, so they can acquire a lootbox faster.

• '''Hexakill''' - 6v6 so you can try to get that fabled "Hexakill!!!" announcer line. In reality, there's just another player to steal your farm / kills / virginity and scream at you for being toxic.

• '''One For All''' - 5 Jarvans vs. 5 Malphites. 5 Caitlyns vs. 5 Ziggs. You will laugh once when everyone ults at the same time, then never return to this boring-as-shit game mode.

• '''Nexus Blitz''' - Riot's attempt at ripping off [[Blizzard]]'s Heroes of the Storm, an even more dumbed down version of DotA with small side objectives, shared gold and events. Even if it's completely unoriginal, they did an okay job for what it is. Like the other modes, it becomes boring really fast, though.

=== Abandoned Modes ===

• '''Twisted Treeline''' - Riot decided that having more than two maps was too confusing for their retard playerbase, and canned this mode in 2019. It was a remastered map that Riot initially tried to make better, again and again. While updating the graphics, they also made it completely unbalanced - first by making it revolve around pole-hugging points, then by adding items that made Singed and Diana even stronger, and allowed early game champions to butt-rape everything. No, your team didn't help you kill stuff, and no, they wouldn't cap points either.

• '''Dominion''' - Removed in 2016, this mode tried to be Battlefield by having players quickly capture points in a circle until the points of one side ran out. While Dominion was actually something original for fucking once in the realm of MOBA games, Riot gave no incentive to actually play it and basically ignored the entire game mode and map. Therefore, it was only played by a niche community, and YouTubers who would play it to make videos that boiled down to "LOL XD Dominion is so shit guys XD Summoner's Rift is so much better". By the end, it was largely used by IP farming bots from (insert Asian country here), then Riot simply deleted it because they were too busy milking the AZN market together with Tencent.

{{fv|BOTDFvids|margin: auto; font-weight: bold; text-align: center;|font-weight: bold;|
<youtube>JjmzQEKoOps</youtube> '''The most accurate LoL animation in existence'''|
<youtube>k_3gSbARZQU</youtube> '''If League promotional material was actually accurate'''|
<youtube>q8VYWByp-HA</youtube> '''A normal day in League of Legends'''|
}}

== Spells ==

[[image:Kingkong_.jpg‎|thumb|BR? They will be in your match sooner or later. HUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUE]]

Ah yes, the spells; the number one game-breaking feature.

• '''Barrier''' - "I'm a pussy who needs shielding" written all over it. Used only by the squishiest of squishy mages.

• '''Clarity''' - Building cheap mana items is too much stress! I'd rather waste a whole spell slot on this!

• '''Cleanse''' - Even if anybody ever used this, it wouldn't help when getting gangraped by three or more champs.

• '''Exhaust''' - Slows enemies down and reduces their damage. That's about it. Underrated, but harder to use effectively compared to some of the other spells, since it has to be used right before the enemy deals their major damage.

• '''Flash''' - By far the most broken spell in the game. Jump to any position in a circle around you, instantly. This fucks up all the enemy's skillshots and makes even the most useless asshole a deadly killer. The entire game is balanced around this spell -- abuse it to the max.

• '''Ghost''' - The "I'm too dumb to avoid running into my own dudes" spell. Usually only seen on tanks like Darius that use it to get a cheap kill.

• '''Heal''' - This skill heals you and an ally, and grants movement speed to both of you. Use this to save your own life or that of others. They will never thank you; they will only call you out to everyone in the game as a noob who didn't take ignite.
[[File:League average rage quit.PNG|thumb|right|The average League ragequit]]
• '''Ignite''' - Hurts enemy champions over time and reduces healing effects. A no-brainer, yet most people die to this because they felt they were too pro to take the "noobish" heal. Can be ran in pretty much any lane; although not always optimal, it's a solid choice.

• '''Smite''' - HAHA OH WOW! A spell that ONLY kills minions and jungle monsters. This spell's entire existence is based around the jungler on your team, so he can suicide-jump into an enemy dragon / baron battle and steal the monster buff at the very last second. When you use it any other way, you'll barely scratch a dragon with it and maybe tickle the Baron. Anyone who's not a jungler and chooses this spell gets automatically branded as a troll / griefer. After buying and leveling the corresponding item, you can upgrade it to either slow an enemy down a little, or reduce his damage for a few seconds. Both options are beyond pathetic. Did we mention that playing Jungler is the equivalent to ass cancer?

• '''Teleport''' - Too lazy to walk? Want to be seen appearing by the enemy with a big glowy light so that they can beat the shit out of you? It's yours my friend, as long as you have enough rupees!

=== Deleted spells ===

• '''Clairvoyance''' - <s>It's like the game devs never learned from the WarCraft 3 Orc Farseer. WHY BOTHER USING A SCOUTING ABILITY ON A GAME WITH A HANDFUL OF UNITS?!</s> Gone, along with Dominion.

• '''Garrison''' - <s>[[Dota]]'s Glyph of fortification.</s> Also DELETED a long time ago, together with Dominion.

• '''Promote''' - <s>Make a siege minion more powerful ... yeah, that sure helps when everybody is capable of killing a minion almost instantly after 15 minutes.</s> Removed. Its effect continues to exist in the item Hullbreaker.

• '''Revive''' - <s>Good luck getting any ranked game started with this ability. It's actually pretty fucking useful for emergencies in late game, where respawn times can take up to a minute. Unfortunately the raging fatass neckbeard children community of LoL does not understand foresight or logical thinking and WILL report you for this spell, ALWAYS.</s> Canceled, although it sort of lives on in the item Guardian Angel.

• '''Surge''' - <s>Buffing yourself only; gee, that's like the Paladins in World of WarCraft all over again.</s> BALEETED, it now partially has its own item in Guinsoo's Rageblade.

== Champions ==

{{fv|champvids|margin: auto; font-weight: bold; text-align: center;|font-weight: bold;|
<youtube>3mNDN7AZC7g</youtube> '''Ryze, the American justice enforcer'''|
<youtube>p-WErNe1x18</youtube> '''Lux, the Sailor Moon reject'''|
<youtube>6mMaiNUpPJQ</youtube> '''Pro Lux Guide'''|
<youtube>5-SfsRFf7Vw</youtube> '''Gangplank, the Jew'''|
<youtube>FU7C4pC6oTM</youtube> '''Garen, the ultimate champ'''|
<youtube>HLI-3eNj-Pk</youtube> '''Mordekaiser's title song'''|
<youtube>Z-odJU9Hris</youtube> '''Teemo, the homicidal critter'''|
}}

 

The champions are soooooo original. They look like stolen artwork from [[DeviantArt]] - [http://zeronis.deviantart.com/gallery/ maybe because Riot's artists ARE from DeviantArt.] The few that are remotely likeable are merely mashups of other things. Riot's inspiration sources are most likely ponies, castles, furfaggotry, sodomy, sluts, emos, Twilight, bestiality and Sailor Moon. [[image:Lol_sameface.gif|thumb|The quality you get when you hire someone whose portfolio entirely consists of WoW elf fanart. No seriously, look it up. He's used the exact same face since 2008.]]

• '''Aatrox''' - A generic "I live to fight" - grunt of some fucking race that faced [[natural selection]] and failed hard. He looks like Devilman, and like him, is so overpowered that he probably also tears out titties and eats them.
[[File:League of Losers r34 orgy.jpg|thumb|right|Things a LoLfag will never experience IRL - No. 215]]
• '''[[Furry|Ahri]]''' - [[Naruto]] fanservice; slutty yiffy fox bitch. Glass cannon assassin who misses her Charm then has to ult to avoid dying.

• '''[[Arab|Akshan]]''' - *Exotic* Arab-looking poofter who can swing around the map and revive entire teams by just killing the dude who did a quadra kill.

• '''[[Mortal Kombat|Akali]]''' - Totally not Jade from Mortal Kombat. A feminazi with dual dick choppers, so she can castrate and kill at the same time. Capable of inflicting stupid amounts of damage in a short time, with a fluency second only to LeBlanc.

• '''Alistar''' - An annoying fucking cow that can slam the enemy and heal. Also hard to kill and was used by over 9000 people.

• '''Amumu''' - Some [[aspie]] who died and won't stop [[bawww|bawwwing]] about it. This green midget mummy fucks up your fun by grabbing you with his bandages then throwing a massive temper-tantrum. (see also: [[aspie]])

• '''[[Chicken|Anivia]]''' - Stupid hipster chicken that thinks fire is too mainstream. While utterly useless against the enemy team, this frozen phoenix can [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eJAN1oDRJpk troll your teammates hard].

• '''[[Loli|Annie]]''' - A small girl, originally designed by a pedophile, who is lightly clothed. Also she can summon [[Pedobear]] to [[Rape|do her bidding]]. Getting caught playing her may get you sent to jail for possession of child pornography. [[image:Tibbers.png|thumb|Riot is known for the variety and care they put into their champions' dialogue]]

• '''Ashe''' - A piss weak overglorified glass cannon that doesn't do ANYTHING special except firing a giant ice arrow that stuns ONE champion across the map. Always the first to die in a teamfight. She is completely item-dependant; if she falls behind in gold income, she won't be able to hurt a fly. Somehow an even worse hero than Traxex, the DotA hero she was lazily plagiarised from. As a pathetic, squishy ADC with no survivability, she ironically performs much better if played as support, who builds cooldown reduction items, which allows her to spam volleys, ice arrows and vision, making her actually useful for the team. But since this is not considered "meta" ("OMG NO REAL SUPPORT!!1"), you'll be treated like a dogshit griefer for the rest of the game.

• '''[[Dragon|Aurelion Sol]]''' - A blue dragon <s>who's got balls (pun intended) orbiting around him</s> that got deleted from the game, just like Aatrox, and replaced with a completely new champ that is all about flying around & shooting beams now. Gets totally destroyed by any melee character.

• '''Aphelios''' - A mute Korean "prettyboy" / edgelord that randomly changes between several weapon types. Used to be so overpowered that he killed people across the map. Since there are almost no buttons to press with this champion, you can play him with the mouse only. He was straight up made for retards.

• '''[[Chikins|Azir]]''' - Riot was so desperate to add another Egyptian god into the game that they decided to make another champion from [[Egypt|Shurima]], since Nasus got bored of stacking Q by himself. Azir is capable of creating a shitload of sand soldiers and dashing to one of them, which makes him a perfect feeder. Notorious for being too hard for most people to play well. Has an [[Incest|intimate relationship]] with his granddaughter, Sivir.

• '''[[Music|Bard]]''' - Some shitty singer from the [[space|cosmos]] that is capable of creating [[Portal|portals]] that can be used by your allies to escape from being gangraped, ([[Fail| but can also be used by your enemies, so they can still pursue them]]). He can [[BDSM|bind enemy champions and minions to each other and to walls]], and create fields that freeze EVERYBODY (including your allies and turrets) [[Za Warudo|in time]]. Bard is always pursued by golden [[Pikmin|Pikmins]].

• '''Bel'Veth''' - A ripoff of Lovecraft's Shub-Niggurath, that looks like a stingray with a fake female body (the world can't exist without Rule 34 porn after all). This jungler is so hideously broken that it can effortlessly tank FOUR players, kill them all and get away with just half of her health lost.

• '''[[Bot|Blitzcrank]]''' - If Pudge from DotA was redesigned as a mecha, though with the noob-friendly gimmick of his huge [[cock|fist]] passing through friendly units. Gets banned in Ranked matches [[over 9000|9001%]] of the time, and when he doesn't his team always loses, because nobody knows how to play him correctly.

• '''[[Rage|Brand]]''' - Literally a flaming, shirtless faggot. Most players are completely unable to land his skillshot stun.

• '''Braum''' - Riot's attempt at milking any meme involving manly men and mustaches with a support champion. Riot tried to make him the Draven of supports, shoving him down everybody's throat, but that failed when people banned him like Blitzcrank, bitching about how strong Braum was while every other support sucked ass. Still gets banned in games even after Riot made him weaker. His accent is somehow goofier than Caitlyn's accent.

• '''[[Cops|Caitlyn]]''' - Steampunk slut archetype with poorly impersonated English accent. Her ultimate is useless against competent enemies. Engages in hot lesbian action with Vi, when not getting anally raped by everyone. She is a one-trick pony that relies on setting up traps directly under champs during the laning phase and hoping they won't move, so she can get a powerful bonus shot. Good players will chain the traps with allies' CC to oneshot you from across the map.

• '''Camille''' - Another slut from Piltover with an augmented body who dives into enemy team with her hooks, traps the enemy carry with her ult and proceeds to oneshot him before getting bursted and killed. [[The Legend of Korra|Definitely not Lin Beifong.]]

• '''Cassiopeia''' - Riot's highly comical attempt at an AP carry; requires staggering amounts of farm just to avoid feeding and will do nothing all game until the enemies walk into a bush and she gets a penta. A favorite of scripters and smurfs. [[Shit no one cares about|Also, she can't buy boots (which makes sense) and gains bonus movement speed from her passive.]]

• '''Cho'Gath''' - Another original champion. Remember to eat several minions and [[cock|grow as big as possible]]. Totally not the Violator.

• '''Corki''' - A dwarf in a chopper. Nope, totally not stolen from Warhammer or WarCraft. [[fact|Every Corki player is a complete asshole]]. He's also a furfag because he was born in Yordle. Formerly one of the only good ranged carries, but since he was nerfed this is no longer the case.

• '''Darius''' - One of the [[Sarcasm|more balanced champions]]. Fucks up your day by swinging a few times, then cleaving prey in half. Extra rage points if one yells "DUNK'D" in all-chat. Don't worry about losing your lane or getting no farm, since Darius requires nothing except to be level 6 to win.

• '''Diana''' - A "[[Warhammer 40,000|heretic]]" (I c what u did there Riot) bitch who escaped the Kitchen Of The Sun and uses her Moon Goddess powers that she read about in feminist literature. On release, was overpowered even for a new Riot champion.

• '''[[Autism|Dr. Mundo]]''' - [[steroids|Roided]] purple dickhead who throws butcher cleavers covered in STDs at people. Impossible to kill, yet lacks hard CC, so enemies just run him in circles as they steamroll his teammates. Is known for going where he pleases.

• '''[[Douchebag|Draven]]''' - Darius' retarded brother. A self loving prick who is famous for being a [[tough guy]] who [[rape|pwns unarmed prisoners with axes]]. Will either go 20/0 or 0/20. '''WELCOME TO THE LEEG OF DRAVEN.'''

• '''Ekko''' - Over-tuned fuckboi of a Champion. Ekko is the epitome of Riot's disgusting game-design philosophy. Massive damage, an enormous shield, CC, a dash, and an ultimate to reset all the mistakes you just made. [[Lie|Absolutely not a champion built for dumbshit 10-year-olds who can't strategize to save their lives.]] ...NIGGA SO BLACK, HE STEALS TIME!!!

• '''Elise''' - Spider-furry with enormous tits, because Riot thinks their demographic will masturbate to bugs. Sadly, they're correct.

• '''Evelynn''' - Dumb blue slut who gets shut down by wards that cost 75 gold. Can and will shove a spike near enemy rectums, though squishy and enjoys getting penetrated. Possibly the worst visual design of any champion. After her rework, she can charm enemies from afar and [[GTFO|GTFO]] with her ult if things go wrong, not forgetting to shove aforementioned spikes into enemies' asses.

• '''[[Bishounen|Ezreal]]''' - The official blonde in-game weeaboo fag and most over-played champion since some [[azn]] said he jerks off to him every chance he gets. Everybody wants to play this guy because of a '''CYBERNETIC ARMOR SKIN''', but guess what -- they all suck ass with him. Basically Lux, but as a carry and with a penis (CITATION NEEDED).
[[image:Tower_Dive.jpg|thumb|Only the brave die young]]

• '''Fiddlesticks''' - Also known as [[priest|Fiddledicks]]. Has a broken combo of fear and lifesteal, and he can summon a bevy of his raven waifus to ruin your day. Mostly played poorly, causing butthurt Fiddle players to accuse their team of not backing them up when they ult 2v5 and get immediately destroyed since they didn't buy Zhonya's.

• '''[[France|Fiora]]''' - A [[Mary Sue]] French fencer who pops your cherry with her foil. Useless in team fights, so Fiora's strategy is to catch you alone. Then, your anus is hers.

• '''Fizz''' - Supposedly a Yordle that lives under the sea. Okay then. Can summon his shark or walrus or whatever to eat you, but will miss. Your team will chase him forever while he invincibly hops all over the map.

• '''Galio''' - <s>Stupid stone gargoyle that nobody plays. Farts at enemy champions and has a mass taunt, causing him to die a billion times unless he builds tanky.</s> Now looks even more stupid, yet he has one of the best CC combos. [[Troll|Don't forget to stay inside his ult.]]

• '''[[Pirate|Gangplank]]''' - A [[Jew]] dressed as a pirate that earns more money by shooting things with his pistol. Gets hit by every move the enemy team has, but eats oranges so it's k. Can speed himself up to run away, and STILL have time to fire cannons across the map to double-kill-steal from bottom lane. Has four viable carry builds. Extremely balanced, although everyone messes up his barrel combos.

• '''Garen''' - A Demacian who claims to be fighting For Great Justice but in fact only uses it as an excuse to get into the League of Legends and fuck his arch-nemesis/"worthy opponent" Katarina. He shows up whenever she does too, and therefore, more Spin Attack bullshit. The longest running joke in LoL, Garen is a cutout copy&paste douchebag white knight warrior with oversized armor plates that doesn't need any mana. He is also the EASIEST ([[srsly]]) champion to play, and doesn't do anything special other than shouting DEMMAACIAAA! and spinning with his blade. The proper way to play Garen is to type "SPIN TO WIN" in all-chat after every kill or assist you earn. He received a redesign, which he didn't need at all, that makes him look like a motherfucking [[Warhammer|'''SPESS MEHREN''']]!

• '''Gnar''' - A furfag Yordle whose passive changes him into a giant furfag called MEGA GNAR (what an original name!). Not only is his passive uncontrollable, but it also gives him abilities that are even shittier than his normal form's abilities, although he gets a fairly broken ult to compensate. Will feed more teams than Twitch and Urgot. He is probably one of Riot's biggest failures because his win rate was somehow worse than Urgot's win rate on release. Buffed now, but stills feed the enemy team.

• '''[[Fat|Gragas]]''' - Has the biggest tits in the entire game. Drinks heavily and enjoys distillery explosions; a true hero to us all.

• '''[[Brokeback_Mountain|Graves]]''' - Pedophile cowboy who was pwned by Twisted Fate and seeks revenge. Got buttraped in prison so hard he walks like a retard now. He then got out and acquired a shitty gun and decided to find his card-throwing nemesis and [[Unrealistic Expectations|get his revenge]]. Also gets nerfed in every patch. Graves players are known for taking all the farm on the map and chain-feeding the enemy, while crying about how much their teams suck.

• '''Gwen''' - A godawful top champ that tries to tickle people to death with her pathetic scissor snaps. Fanboys were hyped for the champ reveal and hoped for an actual doll to play; instead they got another princess Barbie with wacky eyes that can't do anything. Is Viego's daughter-fu, but unlike Viego, which every closet-homo in this game plays regularly, Gwen is being largely ignored.

• '''[[My_Little_Pony|Hecarim]]''' - [[BDSM|SUFFERING IS MAGIC!!]] A faggot centaur ghost or something. Played by [[brony|pony fags]] who think he's OMG TEH COOL. Outclassed by basically every other jungler in the game. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uSsoBrnzO2Y Now actually has a fucking MLP skin.]

• '''Heimerdinger''' - Think the Engineer from [[Team Fortress 2]]. Used to be completely underpowered until Riot buffed the hell out of him. Has two sentry guns that do insane damage on their own and have stupidly long range. He also has a stun which is somehow a very tricky skillshot. Referred to as cannonfodder until the buff, now can get a triple kill without being fed at all.

• '''Illaoi''' - [[Lesbian|A well-built bitch]] that literally (I mean it, she carries tentacles along with her) tentacle rapes the whole enemy team if fed. All she has to do is ult near several enemies and then a literal hentai porn takes place inside Summoner's Rift.

• '''Irelia''' - <s>Another overpowered bitch that people cry about all the time for being too much of a pain with mobility and lane sustain. All matches end with the chorus of NURF IRELIA!!1!</s> Reworked and now she can bypass shields, disarm champions and her Frostblade skin still has the infamous [[Ass|booty]].

• '''Ivern''' - A tree-hugging [[oldfag]] who used to [[Islam|pwn everyone, rape everyone, burn everything down, or all three at the same time]]. Suffered from [[troll's remorse]] and is now a hippy instead. His gimmick is that he [[PETA|has hot anal secks]] with all the Jungle monsters to "free" them instead of pwning them to become [[rich and beautiful]] like every other jungler. Like Maokai, he is [[Otherkin|literally a tree,]] proving that Riot is so fucking dry on ideas that they're ''literally ripping off themselves.''

• '''Janna''' - Boring elf bitch who once upon a time served as Riot's official pin-up girl. Generally just throws pathetically small tornadoes at people, but if cornered will queef with such force that her enemies will be blown away. Pretty much a forgotten champion at this point.

• '''Jarvan IV''' - I'M JARVAN! I'M HELPING! The king of Dumbasscia who used to pwn dragons. He still wants that dragon pussy. His ultimate generally results in a pentakill for the enemy Anivia.

• '''Jax''' - Some anonymous [[hobo]] who lost fingers to gangrene and frostbite. After pwning over 9000 people in the League, <s>was forced to be nerfed by fighting with a lamppost</s> volunteered to fight with a lamppost, because he was bored of winning all the time. Still manages to be OP.

• '''Jayce''' - Mormon Crusader with a Superman baby face. Armed with a fucking hammer and cannon, so can be either melee or ranged. Can be countered by stepping slightly to the side and is usually played by absolutely no one.
[[image:League of Legends - Jayce.jpg|thumb|right|You're in my lane, bro]]
• '''Jhin''' - Crazy motherfucker who [[sick fuck|gets off on death]] and likes to [[win|murder everyone for lulz.]] [[Edgy|Wears a mask that he never removes]], because he is secretly [[fugly]] and/or actually a transexual. Surgically grafted his gun to his dick for art; his ultimate involves whipping his cock out and blowing massive cumwads down his lane to paint his enemies white, because white is an artistic color or some shit. [[Autistic|Is obsessed with the number four]], and [[troll|trolled Zed]] [[Epic Win|into becoming evil]] for great justice. Wants to <s>kill</s> <s>have buttsex with</s> kill and have buttsex with both Zed and Shen as a result, probably in that order.

• '''Jinx''' - A notorious criminal and proud of it, and also equipped with a crack whore laugh that puts Lux to shame. The only flat non-loli bitch in the game, although Riot's new business model requires you to pay for tits due to her alternate skin containing the previously mentioned sacks of fat. She also comes equipped with one of the longest and the strongest pokes in the game, a broken passive for a hit and run play style, a stun that can hit 3 people, a broken mix of attack speed and aoe damage, and a global execute. Riot has out done themselves by making the fairest and most balanced champion to date. TLDR: NO TITS. W, W, W, R
[[File:fat jinx.jpg|thumb|[[Obese|Empowered, Modern American Woman]] Jinx skin now available for 1350 [[jewgold|Riotbuxx]]]]

• '''Kai'sa''' - Void bitch with [[Daddy|daddy]] issues because Kassadin, her daddy, is apparently not giving her enough [[cock|attention]]. Played by some of the dumbest fucks in the entire game. If you see a Kai'sa ADC you might as well give up, that's how rarely they perform well. Always suicide jumps into the enemy, then blames it on the support, from whom she just jumped away 3 miles to score an "easy" kill. Kai'sa players are basically the ADC version of Yasuo players, absolutely disgusting.

• '''Kalista ''' - A group of ghosts all piled up inside a woman turned into a butthurt feminazi, with a vendetta against all types of backstabbers. Her ult is to eat allies and spit them on enemies. If there weren't more mobile champs in the game already, her passive could be the most broken feature in the entire game. Every time she shoots, she can do a small dash - some melee champs without special items are unable to catch up to her and ragequit. Truly the perfect champion for gookclickers.

• '''Karma''' - Exceptionally terrible support hero whose ace in the hole is making her ally move slightly faster. Her only use is as a top solo laner, where she pokes the living hell out of the melee champs until one gank by the jungler destroys her instantly. Can fire a large, powered-up ball of energy that hurts like a bitch.

• '''Karthus''' - Some generic lich guy [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xi0TIoL3yhw who is known to be the most skill-intensive character in the game]. He would be more funny nowadays if his ult hadn't been nerfed so hard. You now actually have to be competent at '''A.S.S.F.A.G.G.O.T.S.''' to troll anyone.

• '''Kassadin''' - One of the victims that got raped by the void tentacle. <s>Having the most cowardly play style, he basically casts void teleport + silence + aoe slow and then runs away. Gets banned 90% of the time on any ranked match because Kassadin only kills noobs at bot to get fed.</s> Reworked: he will now spend his entire early game getting zoned and raped by ad champions while he can't do damage for shit thanks to the new and useless Q passive magic shield that no one asked for. Has now joined the unpopular champion club with Sejuani, Trundle and Urgot.

• '''Katarina''' - QWERtarina. Known for getting raped by everyone when all her abilities are on cooldown. Also Garen's dominatrix.

• '''Kayle''' - Generic androgynous angel warrior copypasta that can stun enemies and rape them with fire. Has hot lesbian sex with her sister Morgana.

• '''Kayn''' - Riot is pretty much doing our job for us at this point. Nothing we can say about this escapee from an emo teen's anal prison would make him out to be any more of a total fucking trash-tier DeviantArt OC than the game itself already does. Playing this champion may result in spontaneous Linkin Park concerts being conducted in your bedroom, your walls being painted black, and your neighborhood being trashed by a couple of guys from West Philadelphia.

• '''Kennen''' - A weeaboo and a furfag. Can fuck people up with his stun-stacking passive.

• '''Kha'Zix''' - [[Pokemon|Scyther.]] He's a fragile bug that jumpscares people by instakilling them. Compareable to Rengar, but less tanky. Gets squashed in every teamfight if he isn't able to isolate targets.

• '''Kindred''' - Another [[furry]]. [[Yes|Noticing a pattern yet?]] Their concept was born after a hard night of [[monkey|Riot's champion designers]] hitting the banana spritzers and reading one too many Discworld books. They are supposed to be [[edgy]], but [[fail]] instead, because Wolf sounds like the Cookie Monster after twenty years of hard drinking, and nobody is afraid of a personification of death when death has about as much meaning as taking a shit on Runeterra. Hobbies include writing poetry about wolves and roses and dead mockingjays, and [[Skeleton|getting triggered by bones.]] Both are active on DeviantArt, [[you|but never post any drawings because neither one has any talent.]]

• '''Kled''' - Literally a furry Yosemite Sam. Lives out in the middle of [[New Jersey|bumfuck nowhere]] with his [[Scalie|lizard.]] Like Yosemite Sam, he is known for his rampant bestiality, complete sociopathy, and Napoleon syndrome. Also like Yosemite Sam, he is a raging faggot, and playing him the way the devs intend you to will probably get you [[Partyvan|b&]] by butthurt teammates who don't realize you're playing the one champion in the game who should be rushing in headfirst like a retard.

• '''Kog'Maw''' - Something that came from the same shitty void neighbourhood that Cho'Gath came from. Will go urka durka allah jihad on your ass if you kill him. Also of note is his ability to vomit at long range.

• '''K'Sante''' - A large negro with dreads that hits people with planks (?) who officially fucks man ass. The originality here is astounding. This lousy champ was released right during the peak of the animated series "Primal", where a black giant (aka ''Giganigger'') smashes people with his bare hands. In response, Riot released an emote called "Giga K'Sante", basically admitting that he is in fact, a nigger. Now, with that out of the way, what's this faggot with two surf boards good for? Nobody knows, because every single time anyone plays him, it's an instant loss. He sucks at being a tank and he's godawful at damage dealing and gets bullied by classic champs like Darius. Maybe he'd have a better chance if stealing bikes was a core feature ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

• '''LeBlanc''' - French bitch. [[trap|Called the deceiver.]] Once her spells are on cooldown she's dead, but not as dead as the target of her spells. Typically spends all game mid, getting 12 kills, then blaming her team she never ganked for when she inevitably loses, because she falls off hard after 25 minutes.

• '''Lee Sin''' - A blind Bruce Lee knock off. One of the best champs, because he can karate-kick from a long distance. Nicknamed "Free Win the Blind Monk" for a predictable reason.

• '''Leona''' - A female game character who is completely clothed. Riot decided to show their respect for women with an hourglass-figure young woman who has pathetic damage output and whose primary purpose is to be beaten up, which has been proven to be a [[fact]] in [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vzHrjOMfHPY the A New Dawn] trailer. She calls upon the powers of the kitchen of the sun, but never delivers a single sandwich... just outrageous.

• '''Lillia''' - Dumb deer jungler that gets its ass kicked repeatedly by pretty much everyone.

• '''Lissandra''' - An ice mage with constant CC and high burst, just like Leblanc - Riot's now resorted to [[lol|plagiarizing themselves]]. If you see this champion, call up your local wildlife protection and report the sighting of a near-extinct species. That's how rare it is to encounter one.

• '''Lulu''' - Dumpy little slut with highly irritating spells. Has an ability that [[Furry|turns you into a small harmless animal]].

• '''[[Call_of_Duty|Lucian]]''' - The 2nd nigger to be in League (first being Nidalee). He lost his wife to a necrophile and decided to steal everyone's bikes by shooting them with <s>[[capcom|Ebony & Ivory]]</s> his two super ancient pistols of light.

• '''Lux''' - Magical blonde mage bitch. She throws light balls around that immobilize with tons of damage, fires a giant laser that obliterates everything, and has a laughing sound that shatters eardrums all over the world. Probably the only (normal-sized) female champion that is not dressed like a whore, though she has changing boob-sizes for every skin. Used to take it [[in the ass]] from Ezrael until [[Fat|Tahm Kench]] ate his dick for [[om nom nom|lulz.]]

• '''Malphite''' - A generic golem. Made of rock, attacks based around rocks and is a tank. Highly innovative. Does no damage and always gets banned in Ranked.

• '''Malzahar''' - Some sandnigger that went to the Void and bought overpowered pushing capability back with him.

• '''Maokai''' - A pissed off tree that realized how fucking stupid the League of Legends was and came to life to chuck explosive tree midgets at everyone. His goal is to never play the game again, because being a thoughtless tree was more worthwhile. He can [[Hentai|"root rape"]] his enemies with his ult.

• '''[[Sonic_The_Hedgehog|Master Yi]]''' - The sanic of the game and a weeaboo. He goes really fast, and then he goes even faster. Absolutely destroys low elos, yet becomes totally useless in Platinum and above because a single CC is more than enough to fuck him up. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LimM9a2ajE4 '''Even people who play him decent enough are fucking retards and that's a fact.''' ]

• '''[[Whore|Miss Fortune]]''' - Slutty big-titty pirate whore. Can push E to make an AOE circle of slow, then walk away unless played by a retard with no map awareness. Farts heart shaped toxic gas when out of combat that inexplicably makes her run faster.

• '''[[Brazil|Mordekaiser]]''' - HUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUE 2/23/8. Mordekaiser Es Numero Uno! QWERignite! Got a rework that changed him from a lulzy metalhead into a big black & dirty colossus that can snatch champs into a different dimension and rape them.

• '''[[Necrophilia|Morgana]]''' - Used to leave menstrual blood all over the place, but Riot changed it to a crystal-like glow in her visual redesign. Wears "sexy" outfits despite heavily [[pro ana|resembling a corpse]]. Her new default outfit also heavily represents a Wild West prostitute for some odd reason and she always does some autistic spin-move every time she walks somewhere. Has hot necro-sex with her sister, Kayle.

• '''Nami''' - Not to be confused with that [[jew]] from [[One Piece]]. A support champion who is most likely fish food for other champions. This bitch has a 5 minute skillshot stun and a 10 minute ult stun. She can also heal while damaging the enemy.

• '''[[Doge|Nasus]]''' - Another champion that was "inspired" by mythology. Wins games by letting his team die for 30 minutes while he sits in one lane and hits Q. If his team lasts this long, Nasus will show up and oneshot the entire enemy team.

• '''[[Lesbian|Neeko]]''' - Underage-looking lesbian lizard with animu eyes that steals other people's appearances / skills. If she hits you with her early game combo you're pretty much dead. OP as fuck obviously.

• '''[[Beastiality|Nidalee]]''' - A furry jungle nigger who likes to throw spears and is able to turn into a cat for no given reason. Has one overpowered skillshot that is the slowest projectile in game, however always ends up instakilling people because LoL players cannot dodge for shit.[[image:NidaleeCougar.jpg|thumb|A fed Nidalee]]

• '''[[Indian|Nilah]]''' - Another super original character design by Riot in 2022: Human, female, average size tits (to not offend any trannies) of impossible to tell heritage (Indian/black bastard child) with a ... *drumroll* MAGIC WHIP! To make this even more innovative, she has a million dashes, earns more XP passively, has an AOE ult just like everyone's favourite power-fantasy supercunt, Samira, aaaaaaand she can dodge attacks. Her "Star Guardian" skin was specifically designed for armpit fetishists. Combine her with a healer like Soraka and she becomes completely unkillable.

• '''Nocturne''' - Angry nigger who, typical of a negro, sits around most of the time and goes out to kill people when it's dark.
[[image:Luxcomic.jpg|thumb|EVERY FUCKING TIME]]
• '''Nautilus''' - Big daddy from Bioshock; armed with an anchor.

• '''Nunu & Willump''' - A big fat Yeti with a little bitch on its head who is harder to kill than John McClane. A recent rework made them both look cutesy, to make more shekels from soyboys.

• '''[[Skyrim|Olaf]]''' - Riot displays their Earth-shattering creativity with this champion; he is a viking. Drops shit tons of damage, yells a lot and can run away really fast. That's it.

• '''[[Portal|Orianna]]''' - Homicidal robotic sex doll. Stole a nut from a bigger robot and throws it around.

• '''Ornn''' - A [[Greek|Hephaestus]] lookalike that doesn't need to go to base because he can forge anything he wants in lane.

• '''[[300|Pantheon]]''' - Leonidas from 300 rip-off with a helmet on top; throws spears and jumps on people like a rapist. His ultimate can be dodged by anyone with common sense, which fortunately for Pantheon players is rarely encountered in LoL. His visual redesign made him all shiny and his attacks too easily readable, causing him to get his ass kicked by any competent team... so again he's totally fine.

• '''Poppy''' - Anti-fun bulldyke smurfette. Cunt-slams people into walls and proceeds to hammer rape them. Is both a tank and an assassin, which is about as balanced as it sounds. She's been reworked from one of the ugliest Yordle bitches in the entire game into [[Mai Waifu|the cutest champion in LoL]] who, like all other Demacian bitches, secretly desires to suck Garen's cock.

• '''Pyke''' - Riot's response to all crybabies that spam "OMG KS REPORT" in chat. Even though his ultimate executes enemy champions below a certain health, gives kill gold and kill count to nearest ally, he still gets flamed by literal [[13-year-old boy|13-year-old boys]] because they think all Pykes are trolling, kill stealing, AD building morons.

• '''[[Bird_is_the_word|Quinn]]''' - Since Riot decided one guy with a bird isn't enough (Swain or even Fiddlesticks) they decided it would be super awesome to add a chick who also has a bird! She also can ride one. Yay.

• '''Qiyana''' - Orange bimbo empress with a dumb weapon, dumb skills and the nicest ass since [[Overwatch|Tracer]]. Her ult makes no sense and despite her being fap-bait for ass fetishists, she has almost no players.

• '''[[ok|Rammus]]''' - Rolls around like Sonic and taunts people. Thrilling.

• '''Rell''' - A retarded negress on a metal horse with terrible abilities and a useless support champion that nobody asked for or wants to play. Rightfully so.

• '''Renata Glasc''' - A tall hag in a suit with a gas mask & a robot drone. Garbage support that is barely useful and has no identity. Only known for two things: A painfully slow ult that makes enemies berserk at each other for like 2 seconds and the ability to keep players in control for a short time after they die.

• '''Renekton''' - A Raptor Jesus bodyguard with a crocodile head that got fucking sick of working in a library his whole life. He's Nasus's brother despite Nasus being a dog.

• '''Rengar''' - A furry version of the Predator. Known for creating many jumpscare moments after savagely jumping out of the bush, as well as being one of the most unbalanced champions in the game because he either gets nerfed into utter uselessness or is broken as fuck. Gets countered by wards like every other assassin, but ONLI DA SUPPORT BUY WARDZ LOL. Press E for [[ebola|[E] bola]] strike.

• '''[[Emo|Riven]]''' - Another shitty champion that can die really fast. Also is a lesbian and has a broken sword. Melee carry who isn't tanky and has no utility. Utterly useless unless she catches the squishy carries out in the open, in which case she will tower dive for a quadra kill. Also totally obnoxious to lane against due to being manaless and having a spammable shield.

• '''Rumble''' - A furfag who operates mechs. Played by [[you|no one]]. Now comes with a [[Gurren Lagann]] skin as an attempt by Riot [[hipster|trying to be cool]].

• '''[[Nigger|Ryze]]''' - Ripped, rune tattooed nigga OG. Puts people in [[Bubba|prison]]. Throws magic watermelons, and despite being cheap is among the most powerful mages. He's also capable of opening a portal and literally [[GTFO|GTFO]]. Despite all his potential he's about as fun to play as swimming in a sea of razors.

• '''Samira''' - A typical independent black woman who don't need no man. Comes with an overpowered version of Katarina's ult that can also move, Xin Zhao's defense against projectiles and she's both melee and ranged and can heal herself. Pretty much a Mary Sue power-fantasy character that steamrolls entire games if she's not shut down early. Pure fucking cancer.

• '''Sejuani''' - [[Beastiality|Dumb cunt on a giant pig]] with a shittier version of Amumu's ult. Widely regarded as crap. Does nothing late game unless she has a perfect beginning and middle which is impossible for any LoL player.

• '''Senna''' - Lucians waifu that somehow escaped from Thresh's lantern - who actually gives a shit? She's a nignog with a skintight suit and an oversized beam weapon that shoots stupidly slow. Can farm souls off the ground to boost her stats and shoot a large energy wave across the map, getting even cheaper kills than Lux. Created for braindead supports that want to damage, heal, stun, run away, and shoot across the map without any of the other champs' downsides.

• '''Seraphine''' - Sona + [[K-Pop]] & [[AIDS]]. Whoever designed this abomination deserves to die in a car crash.

• '''Sett''' - A generic [[Fist of the North Star|Kenshiro-style]] humanoid-furfag bouncer who is so unbelieveably broken that he is able to single-handedly destroy an entire team. All he needs to do is to soak up enough damage, build up a gigantic shield, release it upon a cluster of champs, grab one player, smash him to the ground and then beat the shit out of anyone that's still standing. If he gets fed, the game is pretty much over. The only thing that can actually really fuck him up is damage over time, because it lingers after his shield is gone.

• '''Shaco''' - A douchebag ICP fan who goes invisible and stabs people from behind. He's also fond of [[traps]].

• '''[[Mortal_Kombat|Shen]]''' - [[sarcasm|Totally not Sub-Zero from Mortal Kombat]]. Overpowered like all champs that don't use mana. Takes enormous amounts of damage before going down. Used to be banned every game. Why is he a tank instead of playing like... you know, a ninja?

• '''[[Skyrim|Shyvana]]''' - A dragonborn whose only wish is to suck Jarvan's cock. Upon accumulating enough PMS Power she dons a huge dragon fursuit.

• '''[[Troll|Singed]]''' - [[pro ana|Anorexic]] [[drugs|junkie with a meth lab on his back]]; is able to run fast to fuck people up despite extremely cumbersome weight. He is the most hideously annoying thing in League of Legends if you let him get fed, but luckily any champion can easily counter him by [[Do it faggot|chasing him hard,]] as he is too slow to get away.

• '''[[Dead|Sion]]''' - <s>Copy of any undead warrior from WarCraft 3. Has one good ability. Sion players are still wondering when he'll get a rework and visual update while other champions who don't need updates get them.</s> Got a complete rework. Now he can yell really loud to thrust an enemy minion in the direction of his skillshot and permanently increase his health when he kills anything. His Q has been changed to slow or knockup and stun anything in a cone in front him based on how long the Q button has been held down. Easily dodgeable if LoL players could dodge for shit. Ult now makes him start running really fast and then damage and knockup anything he headbutts while doing this. LoL players however can't aim for shit so they end up headbutting the wall and getting stunned [[At Least 100| at least 100%]] of the time. Passive makes him go into a tard rage when he dies giving him a few seconds of life and replacing all his abilities with a speed buff, just enough to rape anything in the immediate vicinity.

• '''Sivir''' - Steve Irwin's daughter; her entire skillset revolves around throwing a giant boomerang and running fast. Highly original. Notable as a terrible ranged carry even within a game full of terrible ranged carries.

• '''Skarner''' - Some crystal scorpion thing that can drag people to the bushes and rape them. Nobody actually plays this thing anymore.
[[image:Taricthegayknight.jpg|thumb|He's just so fierce & handsome]]

• '''Sona''' - Weaboo DDR band geek whore who consists of nothing but button-mashing. Has psychic powers for no adequately-explored reason. Used to be the best support in the game. <s>Now is nerfed beyond being at all usable.</s> Reworked for no reason at all other than pissing off half of the retards who wanted to play this shitty game with an easy support character. Now she requires effort to be a failure.

• '''Soraka''' - Unicorn furfag that gets all the focus in teamfights. Used to 1v5 the enemy team, but Riot hates her to the point that she immediately gets reworked or nerfed into utter uselessness if she ever gets played in competitive matches. She's still a strong support, because an average LoL player's mindset is like [[Retarded|"oh she's easy to kill anyway, let's kill tanks first"]]. Her stupid gimmick is that she has to damage enemies to heal herself, then use her own health to heal others.

• '''Sylas''' - A self-proclaimed [[Communism|communist]] that steals other champions' ultimates. [[Dota 2|Totally not Rubick.]]

• '''[[BDSM|Syndra]]''' - [[BDSM|Dominatrix]] that kills with her giant black balls. Is a mage with bad AP scaling. Nice one Riot. Known for having a cheap ult that one shots anyone at level 6.
[[image:Twistedfatenerf.png|thumb|His sanity dropped even further with the horrible splash art that had to be quickly replaced]]

• '''Swain''' - <s>A bird fetishist who hates Jarvan. Will totally pwn other people with his ultimate because it has a low cooldown. Totally not a servant of Tzeentch from Warhammer 40K.</s> [[Harry Potter|Reworked into Lucius Malfoy.]] He's still a drain tank but Grievous Wounds or Ignite can still easily fuck him up.

• '''Tahm Kench''' - An obese motherfucker born out of a determined effort by Riot to simultaneously rip off both [[Disney|The Princess And The Frog]] and Eka's Portal, he is definitive proof - as if you needed any after Kha'Zix and Cho'Gath - that somebody on Riot's development team is a [[vore|voreaphile.]] His primary gimmick is, as you might expect, to [[Om nom nom|eat enemies and teammates whole.]] Since you [[lulz|don't need your teammate's permissions to eat them,]] he has trolling potential almost as vast as his fat ass. 

• '''Taliyah''' - [[Avatar: The Last Airbender|Toph Beifong]], nuff said. Nobody plays her because she's no fun, her skills suck and she looks like a very ugly female copy of Disney's Aladdin.

• '''[[Gay|Taric]]''' - Gay <s>crystal</s> *stars* knight who comes in FAAABULOUS colors like lavender and turquoise. Was once designed for noobs to get into support / top and for autists who love juggling spell cooldowns. He was reworked / replaced like everything fun in the game. He's now a lame combination of Omniknight & Io, both from DotA 2, using Io's linking mechanic and a inoffensively gay space theme. Playing him is now a test of your patience and sanity as the shitters you call teammates miss every stun-setup and run away from your ult. Truly outrageous.

• '''[[Assassin's_Creed|Talon]]''' - Weak as hell and useless in teamfights. Has to use all his abilities just to get one kill. Don't underestimate him though, he can jump over walls like a freerunner and shove his blades up your squishy ass.

• '''[[Troll|Teemo]]''' - Also known as Satan in the League of Legends community, due to how overpowered he is. He's a tiny woodland critter furfag asshole that turns invisible, while simultaneously planting explosive mushrooms everywhere. Shrooms scout the map, act as free wards that last twice as long, and detonate whenever some unlucky noob steps on them, contaminating the victim with a [[AIDS|severely noxious poison that kills him over time]]. Can also play as a ward by just sitting still for a few seconds, run faster than most champs, and ADDITIONALLY has the ability to shoot a dart that blinds enemies, causing them to miss their attacks. The amount of suffering his shrooms have caused over the runtime of the game is unbelieveable. He is without a doubt the last bastion of lulz in this Chink-infested SJW shithole. [[Fox News|Fair and balanced]].

• '''Thresh''' - [http://www.eonline.com/news/79447/boy-oh-boy-george-singer-sentenced-to-15-months Pale faggot that keeps people in dungeons and beats them with a length of chain.] [[YHBT|Stole the soul of Lucian's wife]], and keeps it around his neck [[IDIFTL|for the lulz]].

• '''Tristana''' - A blue shortstack yordle who is Teemo's girlfriend. This smurf midget jackoff likes to blow shit up with her cannon and jump on enemies. Known for giving champions an instant heart attack with her massive blowjob combo post level 6.

• '''[[Troll|Trundle]]''' - <s>[[you|A cursed Troll that smells like garbage, and ruins everything he comes near with his defiling presence alone.]]</s> Reworked: now he is just a generic ice troll in a fantasy world. Nobody plays him, because his playstyle is very situational and boring. Has some trolling potential with his pillar.

• '''[[Rage|Tryndamere]]''' - Faggot barbarian with a tard rage ability that makes him invincible for a few seconds. Played by 13 year old boys who drink too much Mountain Dew and Red Bull. Easily shut down by exhaust or any hard CC. [[Bill Clinton|Currently getting blown by Ashe for political reasons.]]

• '''Twisted Fate''' - A Gambit copypasta (from X-men) without the bullshit excuse of having an explosive touch to justify him killing people by throwing playing cards. Can teleport anywhere on the map, which generally just makes him a more effective feeder.

• '''Twitch''' - Jewish rat armed with a weird ass crossbow, which can poison people and activate a fart bomb after some stacks. Invariably feeds, but can [[raep]] a whole team if fed. After his visual upgrade, he will now never shut the fuck up with every mouse click. He has legs now too.

• '''Udyr''' - A true weeaboo furfag who can use the power of 5 furfags to rape enemies.

• '''[[You|Urgot]]''' - A fatass undead-spider-robot-thingy... actually nobody knows what the fuck this thing is. "It" is so easy to play: All you need to do is have a lock on and spam Q. Does everything from throwing poison bananas to switching places; the product of LSD night at the Riot [[mantrain]] party. <s>Riot finally gave Urgot half-assed upgrades to make people think they care about "it" (even Riot hates Urgot).</s> Riot reworked him and made him so fucking OP that he now grabs people under a certain percent of health and literally tears them a new asshole.

• '''[[Faggoth|Varus]]''' - <s>A weeaboo, who after becoming [[an hero]] by burning himself up with this totally not evil flame, got a demonic bow and a new pair of pants.</s> NEW LORE - CONFIRMED [[Fag|GAY]]. A homicidal demon [[twink]] with the souls of two [[Necrophilia|dead gay men inside of him]]. His ult fires two "chains of corruption" that bend you over and [[AIDS|poz]] you. Routinely has a sub-50% win rate, but still gets nerfed because of [[homophobia]]. Still not as gay as Taric.

• '''Vayne''' - Just some squishy <s>Van Helsing</s> Batman tryhard bitch that is impossible to kill if fed, due to all her abilities also being utility spells. She rolls around like Sonic with a nicer ass, and if she pins you to a wall your anus is hers; hope you like strap-ons!

• '''Veigar''' - What happened when Dick Dastardly and Lord Voldemort double stuffed a Final Fantasy black mage and gave birth to a disgusting furfag midget. He instantly kills anyone that builds squishy with his fucking huge stun ring and nuking them with everything he's got, but will be bent over and raped himself otherwise. As the only [[Nigger|black]] yordle he is naturally the only one to have gone to prison. [[image:Darkmatterbam.png|thumb| Every Veigar game, ever.]]

• '''[[Tentacles|Vel'Koz]]''' - Another void alien thing, this time a Lovecraftian tentacle rape monster with a tentacle for each hole. Now we know what turned Kassadin and Malzahar void-gay. Once everybody under the age of 21 got over all of the shitty hentai/tentacle rape jokes they made about Vel'Koz (some involving Annie because the LoL community is full of pedophiles and faggots), they stopped using him, realizing he isn't fun to use due to his skill shots being annoying to land.

• '''[[Goth|Vex]]''' - Perma-depressed, edgy Yordle goth chick that punishes the use of any kind of dash abilities in her vicinity. The amount of porn that was produced for this champ before it was even officially released is staggering.

• '''[[Lesbian|Vi]]''' - Caitlyn's lesbian lover. Punches things with giant robot hands. Giving a generic barbie doll pink hair and two giant fists does not make a clever champion design, Riot...

• '''Viego''' - Flashy, shirtless faggot king that announces his approach every single time with a green wave on the floor, which allows just about anyone with at least some skill to tear him apart as soon as he becomes visible. The only way he gets any kills is when he catches someone off-guard, and even then he's pretty awful at that. Designed purely for chinks and closet-homos.

• '''Viktor''' - Riot's attempt at ripping off Adeptus Mechanicus from Warhammer 40K. He stole Jayce's shit and got owned. Can fire his lazor and summon a butt vortex thing that is totally useless against everyone. If he gets jumped by anyone he's dead.

• '''[[Twilight|Vladimir]]''' - A generic gay vampire. His spells steal life (who could have guessed?) while his ult spreads AIDS to the enemy team, and he can piss off everyone by melting into an invincible pool of menstrual blood.

• '''Volibear''' - The bear from "Golden Compass" - copypasta. Shoots lightning and runs fast. Spends all of his late game getting kited and pedocharging the enemy carry.

• '''Warwick''' - King of the Furfags. Capable of yiffing enemies so hard they become immobilized.

• '''[[Retard|Wukong]]''' - Riot showing their originality by copying the same chink garbage that Dragon Ball did. Is a totally useless champion; all he is able to do is escape death. Has the same gay spin move Garen has, only it somehow sucks even more.

• '''Xayah and Rakan''' - Not just one, but TWO more furfags. As members of the Furluminati, they seek to establish furry dominance over mankind, thus ensuing endless yiffing for the rest of Runeterra's history. Their dialogue sounds like it was written by an edgy DeviantArt-going angsty teenager, making them slightly above average for Riot. They are designed to go together, thus exasperating the already-massive problem of finding an ADC or Support who isn't a gibbering fuckwit. The only positive thing they bring to the table is the satisfaction of killing them over and over.

• '''Xerath''' - Overpriced crystal ultra mage thing. <s>Aside from having stupidly long range, he is useless.</s> Now reworked with an even more overpowered ult that can shoot its blue balls across the map, 3 TIMES. Kill secured.

• '''[[Wapanese|Xin Zhao]]''' - The only weeaboo living in Demacia, also the wet dream of every dynasty warrior Zhao Yun fanboy. Usually jumps into fights too early, realizes he can't get out, panics and hits R, then tries to run away before getting gutted by the enemy tank.

• '''Yorick''' - Emo grave digger, attacks with aborted zombie fetuses. <s>Good at trolling every champion by spamming the same spell over and over. Known for having no counter when walking into a bar.</s> Reworked to be a shitty knockoff of [[Doge|Nasus]] with [[Loli|Annie]]'s ultimate. Fuck you ghostcrawler.

• '''Yasuo''' - A homeless, alcoholic Ching Chong champion. [[OJ Simpson|He was accused of unjustified murder and has been trying to find the truth ever since, by killing more people.]] Able to create a wind shield that somehow blocks all projectiles despite being made out of fucking wind. Had the highest ban rate at several points in time, because of his passive giving him a lot of critical hit damage, even though only one competent guy in Korea knows how to use him. Yasuo players are the worst of the worst, worse than even the typical arrogant ADC player. They are the perfect representation of every tryhard retard that ever existed. Watch them die once, cry, and then run down into the enemy tower repeatedly until the game is over. They are purely driven by ego, nothing they do or say has anything to do with teamwork.

• '''Yone''' - Essentially Yasuo 2.0 - created specifically for tryhards that couldn't handle Yasuo's positioning. He got fucked in the ass by his brother and now has a demon stuck in his head or something. Can overextend his own attack range by projecting himself forward to hurt champs. Any competent team can easily shut him down every time he does this, though. Other than that, as with Yasuo, Yone players are pure egomaniacs and shitheads.

• '''Yuumi''' - [[A_cat_is_fine_too|A cat is fine too]]. Hey, do you hate playing League of Losers? Do you want to jerk off, without getting flagged as AFK, while occasionally pressing a button or two? '''Then this champ is for [[you]]!''' The kittycat attaches to another champion like a parasite and becomes nearly invincible, while passively giving bonus stats to her host. The only way she can die like this, is if she directly damages someone in turret range, or if whoever she's attached to runs into the enemies and feeds both their lives away. A champion built purely for e-girls to get boosted by their friend group. You just have to press a spell every now and then, and most people probably won't even notice you left for the bathroom five minutes ago.

• '''Zac''' - [[crap|Disney themed]] Flubber rip-off by Riot. A jelly man that has an attack that can melt down bitches' clothes... well at least we wish he could do that. Beating up naked sluts would make this game slightly more tolerable. Anyway, this champion is a complete pain in the ass, as he breaks up into pieces that you can't kill alone before he comes back to life.

• '''[[Terrorist|Ziggs]]''' - Batshit furfag who likes to blow shit up. That's it. Only way he can get off is by watching 9/11. Has a skillshot which everybody fucks up.

• '''[[Old|Zilean]]''' - Autistic [[lemonparty]] veteran. He walks around carrying a giant clock for no adequately explained reason. Can revive teammates with his ult but players always use it too early or too late and mess it up.

• '''Zed''' - A highly original ninja character. Three generic ninjas at the time were not enough, apparently. Rapes everyone by pressing R on the enemy. To win a game, spam all abiliies, then laugh at the enemy as they explode helplessly, while you're already on the opposite side of the battlefield. Totally not Shredder from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

• '''Zeri''' - Imagine being so unoriginal that you have to remove an item that everyone loved (Statikk Shiv) and transform it into a danger hair Pikachu version of Jinx. Jumps around like Kennen and causes ranged damage to groups of enemies by slamming the Q button repeatedly until its worn out.

• '''[[Lolicon|Zoe]]''': A child that is actually thousands of years old. Zoe has been used as fap material for pedophiles and hentai fans since her release. She has an ability that can put pedos to sleep, allowing her to oneshot them. Picks up Summoner Spells and item actives from other champions. Can also open a portal to teleport a short distance, then immediately return. Anybody with common sense can easily dodge her sleep ability, even though [[Truth|99% of LoL players can't dodge shit]].

• '''Zyra''' - Totally not Poison Ivy / Witchblade. Totally not broken as shit. Absolutely doesn't look like Kerrigan from [[StarCraft]] and in no way is her ability, shitting out plants that look like Zerg Spine crawlers, stolen from another game.

= Tactics & Behaviour =

[[image:TheteamsV2.jpg|thumb|DotA or LoL, it doesn't matter, it's the same shit.]]

[[image:Attention green.svg.png|30px]] Here's a real challenge: '''"Name a community worse than LoL"'''

There's a simple rule for everything you do: '''DON'T LISTEN TO YOUR TEAMMATES, EVER!''' They will ALWAYS treat you like shit, no matter how good or bad you are. Play freestyle; make your own metagame rules or just fuck the rules. Doesn't matter, just avoid doing any of that "Support" or "Jungle" shit. Try to be as flexible as possible. And remember to ALWAYS blame the [[pussybitch|support player]] for all your shit, questioning their sexual preferences and the legitimacy of their birth each time you get pwned by the enemy jungler.

• '''If you're losing, every team member will blame it on another team member until a flame war starts. Then the all chat is spammed with ridiculous insults.'''

• '''If you're winning, the chances of a flame war decrease, unless someone is not doing so well, gets called a noob and then leaves the game to show everyone who's boss.'''

Remember, when you play well, you are a ''try-hard''. If you die too much, you are a ''feeder''. Just be completely mute and pick whatever you want, regardless of the team make-up. You'll get banned sooner or later anyway, no matter what you do. ''Chances of getting blamed for losing depend solely on your role.''

'''No matter what role you play, who wins or who's playing, there will be flaming and raging involved, and this game will turn you into a raging asshole who can not take the slightest responsibility for his own failure.'''

[[File:League Rage.png|thumb|right|The League community is a nice place. This particular incident was caused by someone non-stop taunting with his "Little Legend" avatar", doing noises like *SQUEAK-SQUEAK-SQUEAK*.]]

== Roles ==

• '''AD Carry''' aka '''Farming''' - You stay in your lane and kill as many minions as possible to get enough jewgold. Pretty simple, right?

~ ''... Unfortunately being the role with the highest DPS and lowest health makes you a high priority target, but your teammates won't care. It's your fault for getting killed by the entire enemy team while your teammates chase the tank/support. Expect lots of blame, because it's your fault for not "carrying the game".''

Killing more minions than usual makes teammates rage too, as they complain that you're [[crybaby|pushing the lane too much]]. Usually the Carry bears a deep hatred for his Support. His entire existence is based on waiting for the Support to fuck things up so he can attain hugboxing from the enemy team. The ADC in its current form is considered the least useful part of the team and if you, as a Support, get harassed by one, '''just abandon the dipshit'''. You can still easily win the game by helping another lane, if there's enough time left.

• '''Support''' aka Jewgold thief - These are the poor guys that have to buy and place wards on different spots of the map and keep the farmer alive so that he can get his precious gold.

~ ''Expect your lane partner to blame it on you when things aren't going so well. The enemy has an aggressive support that keeps snagging your carry who is too far out? It's your fault. Your carry doesn't get back when a jungler appears in your wards? It's your fault. Auto attacked once in the first five minutes? That's why your carry has no farm.''

It doesn't even matter if you keep him alive. You failed to stun the enemy champ that just killed your suicidal partner? Expect a report. You were unable to actually fire anything because everything is on cooldown? REPORT! You got a kill with the help of your Carry? REPOOORTTTTTTTTTT!!!!111 ... Basically, you're '''FUCKED'''.

• '''Middle''' - The teams' scapegoat. Not only do you have to keep track of the roaming idiot you're laning against, your jungler will also expect your cooperation for every play he makes, regardless of whether you can actually get there or not. After about 15 minutes, your team will usually get bored of feeding, and decide to play ARAM in your lane instead.

~ ''Expect every failed jungle gank to be your fault. If you die once in your lane the game is automatically lost and it's all your fault. If you forget to call out a missing lane opponent ("MIA" for North America and [[Nazis|"SS"]] for Europe), shit's gonna hit the fan for you.''

The middle player is known to be a smug asshole who thinks he's a pro for flashing into safety and killing a bunch of minions. This guy is probably the most likely to ragequit when things aren't going so well.

• '''Top''' - Basically an island. This role requires you to be completely alone and manage to survive long enough until the enemy turret on your lane is destroyed. Your only help will be a unreliable jungler who yiffs with the local wolves.

~ ''Watch on, helplessly, as your 0/4 lane opponent teleports to bot lane. See how your teammates fail to retreat, despite having ample time to do so. Bask in the flame of your so-called "allies", as they ping your teleport (it was on cooldown), your ultimate (you didn't have it), and anything else they can desperately grasp at to hide how terrible they are.''

The top player always sees himself as the superior being, close to godhood. Never question his playstyle or he will go apeshit and run into the next turret.

• '''Jungler''' - In this role you're the guy who kills the monsters in the surrounding woods to get their buff effects. Then you have to run on a random lane to (hopefully) gangrape an enemy hero.

~ ''You are to blame whenever a lane isn't doing well. It doesn't matter if it was a 1vs1 first blood on the opposite side of the map, you weren't magically there so it's your fault. Expect all the blame, even when you're winning.''

Junglers are known to be the most selfish pricks of the entire game. They will never, ever help you when you actually need them. If your turret is being attacked by a horde of minions during which you are probably dead, this guy is killing creeps next to it. He will not run around the corner to help.

== Types of Players ==
[[File:epictrollwasonlypretending.png|thumb|right|The average League griefer]]
• '''The Chatterbox''' - Before the game even starts, this player will make his presence known in the pre-game lobby. It usually starts out friendly enough - some banter back and forth, discussion of the local weather, and maybe a "good luck, team". Once you get in-game, though, all bets are off. Sit in amazement as he spends the entire match in all-chat, using the game as his personal social media platform. If he dies, he will unleash 15 years' worth of impotent rage on any player unlucky enough to be nearby.

• '''The Griefer / Troll''' - Depending on his actual intellectual prowess, the griefer can be both manipulative and excruciating and turn entire teams against each other. However, 90% of the idiots you meet in this game that say they are "trolling" are just pissed off teenagers from third world countries, that think intentionally feeding the enemy will increase the size of their dicks and bring their point across.

• '''The Hardstuck Pro''' - This mouthbreathing retard thinks he knows exactly what all his teammates should be doing at any given time. Known for making terrible calls over and over, like running into the enemy jungle alone with no vision, because he saw someone do it in a pro game. When he inevitably fails due to his lack of knowledge about WHY things should work, he will immediately deflect onto the nearest teammate, pinging their ability cooldowns and giving the full breakdown of why it's their fault that he has a 20% winrate.

• '''The Metafag''' - Somewhat related to the Hardstuck Pro, the Metafag is the kind of player that believes that ''law is everything'' and rules should never be broken. What this means is that you're dealing with a retard who follows streamers/Youtubers/guides and shifts his entire playstyle after them. He refuses to accept any other alternatives and only follows the current meta, like a braindead sheep. Ingame this dumbass will harass you non-stop till the end of the game for daring to play "off-meta"; like for example, choosing a champion like Teemo to play support, because according to him it's against the norm and you'd have no chance of winning, EVER. NO FUN ALLOWED. Players like this believe they're in an actual tourney game and will scold others who do not follow their beliefs. When you combine metafaggotry with a Hardstuck Pro type of player, you get a mongoloid fuckface who actively feeds your enemy or chooses a terrible champ for his own lane out of pure spite, then cries for the rest of the game about the off-meta player and tries to get him banned.

• '''The Pacifist''' - Seemingly all this player wants to do is sit under his tower and watch the minions kill each other. Known for incessantly spamming the "get back" ping when a teammate moves anywhere near an enemy champion. It can be 5v1 in his favor, and this faggot will still be cowering in fear on the opposite end of the lane.

• '''The Pusher''' - "Wards? What are those?" This player knows only one way to play this game - push every minion wave as hard as possible. Will inevitably get butt-raped by the enemy jungler over and over, then type "jg diff" in all-chat.

• '''The Sexual Deviant''' - ''ERP, anyone? :3'' ... these horny faggots, usually duo queued, typically botlane, have made it their mission to masturbate as loudly and publicly as possible. They've memorized the perfect combination of taunts to simulate sexual acts on any given champion. Be sure to mute them immediately, or your chat will be filled with oWo and uWu for the remainder of the match. Oftentimes you will still win despite them having no idea that they're playing a video game, because the enemies will close the game in disgust after 30 minutes of this bullshit.

• '''The Surrender Monkey''' - The guy that always tries to force the team to surrender when someone dies or an objective is lost. Moaning, bitching and crying is his passion for the rest of the game and if his team somehow manages to win anyway, he'll always be the first one to say "GG EZ" at the end.

• '''The Tower-diving Faggot''' - This suicidal motherfucker, typically a Top or Mid player on your team, always tower-dives to get a kill. If he fails at doing so, he will report his team for their lack of assisted suicide. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=URNwA28iJyc It's fucking true.] If this guy is your Carry, it's better to just steal his farm as soon as possible.

== Trolling ==
[[File:Jarvan.jpg|thumb|right|Self-explanatory]]
Can't rank up anymore? All the champions feel the same? Game's just not ''fun'' like it used to be? Here's an opportunity for you to take out some petty rage on your hapless teammates. Like any competitive game with an addicted, emotionally unstable playerbase, LoL is fertile grounds for trolling. Surprisingly little is required in the way of game knowledge or skill, although you'll be at an advantage if you've got some experience. You'll usually find the most success if you pick ranked mode - your teammates will be invested in trying to win, with emotions (and death scores) running high - but you'll also have to be more careful to avoid getting banned than you would in a normal match. Note that what's listed below is only a brief outline of what you can do, and that it's a good idea to combine lots of different methods rather than just sticking to one thing for the whole game. Happy hunting!

• '''Before the Match''' - The best traps are laid far in advance. If you've got some time before the game, why not look up your teammates? Take note of anyone who's in a promotion series, as they'll be the most invested in the outcome of the game. If you find someone on a big losing streak, congratulations - you might be able to induce a ragequit before the match is over. There is also a little game you can play, in which you see how many lobbies you can ruin before you get in a match. The important thing to know about this is that there is a stacking penalty for leaving the champion select lobby, so it's pretty annoying for most people to do. Some players will leave the lobby if you simply pick an off-meta combination of role, champion, and summoner spells. To take it a step further, you might want to ban someone's selected champion, or start throwing out random accusations in the pregame chat. There's nothing like a little warm-up before the big game.

• '''Ban Evasion''' - With the Tribunal gone, most bans now seem to be handed out by some kind of AI - so if you know what to watch out for, you should be able to keep your account afloat for quite a while. Mostly, you want to avoid the super obvious "running it down". At maximum, you can do this a few times per match, and it's better if you spread them out as well. Chatting is another difficult area, as it becomes very tempting to bait your teammates into a flame war. The problem is that if you send too many messages, especially if they're openly inflammatory, you risk crossing a threshold which will lead to you getting chat restricted. There's no exact number to track, as it also depends on what you're saying, but getting a chat restriction can make the next few games less entertaining. Certain words will also trigger a chat restriction immediately.

• '''Chatting''' - It's best to keep your messages related to the game, both to avoid getting banned, and because most players will be unable to resist taking the bait. Try to go for quality over quantity with your messages - spamming will work for a game or two, then you'll get hit with a chat restriction. Be subtle if you can (but not too subtle, remember your audience can barely read), and just keep the ban AI in mind as you type. Openly lying can be very effective, especially after you've just lost a big team fight, as it frequently leads to rage and confusion about what actually happened. The AI, having no way of knowing the context of the game, will not be able to punish you for this sort of thing. Try to pick good targets for chat trolling, such as anyone sending angry messages or using lots of pings. Also try to lead your target out of his autopilot mode where he's simply delivering canned responses, as all LoL players have had some experience with (very unskilled) chat trolls. Ideally, you want to get everyone else talking a lot more than you. Don't forget that you can also add players after the game is over, if you want to keep going with a significantly reduced ban risk.

• '''Feeding''' - Simple and effective, although it can lose its edge if you're too transparent. Like with chatting, it's a good idea to pick your target, both in terms of which enemy to feed, and which ally to piss off. If you're playing a jungler, try to grab double buffs before feeding, to make it extra painful. As stated earlier, it's important to not simply run into towers over and over, as you'll just be detected by the automated system and handed a 14 day vacation. Occasional, high-impact deaths are the way to go. If you're going to die repeatedly, it should be in fights, or getting picked off in a vaguely believable way. If you're a jungler, it should look like a gank gone badly wrong - throwing skillshots the wrong way, then overchasing is usually good enough. If you want to die 1v1, you can be a little more relaxed, but remember the AI is still watching. Overstaying when you're low on HP will often be effective, as you'll attract attention from your teammates, who will be pinging you to get back. When you inevitably die to the enemy's flash+skillshot, you can farm some extra rage.

• '''Ability Interactions''' - While a team-based game might seem ripe for trolling your allies with your own abilities, LoL doesn't actually have too many interactions that can directly affect allies in a negative way. Champions that create terrain stand ahead of the pack, most notably Anivia. Anivia has loads of potential for trolling enemies with her passive, and both allies and enemies with her wall. Her passive is great because everyone forgets about it, so you can easily stand around at low HP and wait for your enemy to do something stupid. Your wall will actually get wider as you level up the ability, so make sure you max it first. The wall is truly your bread and butter on Anivia. You'll frequently be able to save low HP enemies by walling in front of them. If you notice that one of your allies doesn't have flash or a dashing ability available, you can simply wall behind them when they step near the enemies for a guaranteed kill. Jarvan is another champion that can troll with terrain, but it's harder, as he can't simply place his wall anywhere the way Anivia can. He does, however, have the advantage of creating a circular wall that can't be walked out of. Excluding terrain-creating champions, your options are fairly limited. Tahm Kench's ultimate allows him to eat an ally, but it's only for a second, and it has a really long cooldown. Kalista can use her ultimate to bring an ally to her, but they can dash a long distance out of it, so it usually won't end too badly for them. One final note is for Shen. His ultimate is almost always helpful to an ally since it grants a huge shield, but if you can find an ally who's certain to be dead even with the shield, you can cast your ultimate on them to give the enemies some extra gold.

• '''Roles''' - Support is a very powerful role for trolling, since you're always near at least one ally. You can do simple things such as repeatedly miss your skillshots, or die in a stupid way. It's super effective if you fail to heal/shield your ally at the appropriate time. The support role also allows you to make your carry useless for the rest of the game, essentially crippling their will to play. Jungle is another powerful choice. Perhaps not surprisingly, one of the most effective ways you can troll as a jungler is simply by doing nothing. If you just run around the map and take camps over and over, the enemies will have free reign over the map, your team will slowly realize that it's a 4v5, and pings and butthurt messages will begin to pile up as the game falls apart. Bonus points if you feed the enemies double buffs every now and again. Incidentally, this is one of the possible ways to be essentially AFK without actually getting flagged as such by the system. Another thing you can do, as either jungler or support, is take your teammates' minion waves whenever you get the chance. Not only do you send all that gold and experience into a black hole for your team, you can also induce a lot of butthurt if you do it when your laner is actually in the lane. If you're playing mid/top, don't feel left out, because you can always take teleport and make a big mess in someone else's lane every few minutes. Mid laners also have a lot of potential to roam either top or bot, or even into the enemy jungle if you're feeling bold. One of the best times to do a troll roam is just after your lane opponent got a successful roam off (which you failed to warn your allies of). You can have some fun with AD Carry too, such as by intentionally missing every minion. Nothing will make your support rage like seeing that his carry has a perfect 0 farm at 20 minutes into the game.

• '''Two Player Mode''' - If you can find a "partner in crime" who will troll with you, your success will go through the roof. Ideally, this is someone you queued up with beforehand, but you can sometimes convert people in-game too. Being able to back each other up in the chat is invaluable, and you can get a lot more done around the map with two people compared to just one. One thing in particular that you can do with two people is to target your team's jungler for extermination. For this strat, both of you take smite, go to opposite sides of the map, and take as many of his camps as you can. He might get desperate and try to force a gank or an invade into the enemy jungle, but since you've already set him behind, it shouldn't end very well for him. In the time that he wastes running around the map, you can take the rest of his camps.

• '''Behavior''' - There are also some general playstyles that you can adopt in your quest to farm lulz. Picking a player and following him around everywhere is a good one, especially if you're not playing support. If you're in a duo lane and want to get your lane partner riled up, try standing still and letting skillshots hit you. Using summoner spells like ghost or heal when they're unnecessary can work if you're going for the "noob" image. Teleporting to lane at the start of the game is another one in the same vein. Whatever you do, always remember: if someone criticizes you in the chat, make sure to vigorously defend your actions as though they're the most natural thing in the world.

= Getting Banned =

Ever since the old days, when the "Tribunal" was put in place, banning players has become a daily activity. Of course Riot denied the fact that this system was heavily biased, abuseable and didn't provide the "judges" with any screenshot evidence. Getting reported and banned was therefor easier than winning a game.
[[Image:3dayban.png|thumb|Get your ban today for winning the game AND making a sandwich]]

Many years later they replaced the "Tribunal" with an automated detection system that punishes instantly and is actually even worse than the Tribunal ever was. It does not actually punish so-called "trolls", griefers and retards, but instead punishes the ones that are actually trying to put those people into their places. Back in the old days of the Internets, flaming was used to not just harass someone, but to also joke around, aka banter. All of this is now forbidden thanks to the SJW robot overlord that watches over every single League of Losers player. No fun allowed, no more banter, no more playing angry, 3 strikes and you're out.

'''If you think "trolls" are the problem here, you are a fucking idiot.'''

It should be noted that whatever you do in LoL accumulates. You can be the nicest guy ever for dozens of games, but if you said a few bad words in the last 100 games or rage-quit, it will fuck you over at the very moment you say something bad again and an entire team reports you. Banning players is way too profitable (reselling the same shop items to retard-addicts) for Riot Games, after all.

This handy little list will explain to you what kind of things get you banned in League of Legends:

• '''Will get you banned instantly:'''
[[Image:Dontknowwhostrollingwho.png|thumb|The average "Tribunal" judge.]]
→ Saying a single fucking bad word in chat, especially /all chat, which begs the question as to why /all chat even exists in the first place besides to provoke the emotionally brittle retards that make LoL their permanent home. Don't even try to write something like "Player X ruined the game", because even that shit gets you banned.

→ Saying any of the typical NO-NO words like nigger, faggot etc. Yes, we put this in a seperate category, because you can even get banned when you're not using these "harsh" words. That's how bad the situation has become.
[[image:lol tribunal developers.jpg|thumb|right|Always trust the developers, they know what they're doing :)]]
→ Using any of the following terms: '''gg''', '''ez''', '''kys''' or any other retarded buzzword that is considered offensive nowadays.

→ Making sandwiches.

→ Being AFK for 5 minutes. It's actually worse to be afk for a few minutes than to outright leave the entire game, because for some reason the AFK penalty doesn't apply, so if someone reports you right there, you'll get the full punishment, especially when you said a single bad word.

→ Taking the (now defunct) "Revive" spell or pressing the random champion button. (This used to be a thing, no joke)

• '''Will get you banned sooner or later:'''

→ {{ytlink|sHhFKAgYc08|Playing Teemo}}

→ "Feeding" (which is 80% of the time a shitty excuse to ban someone who died a few times) or just being a player with lots of deaths (eventhough you tried everything you could to hold the enemy). HEROIC SACRIFICES ARE NOT TOLERATED!

→ Being a "troll" (seriously, LoLplayers don't even fucking know what a troll is. For them everything that they don't like or understand in their peabrain is trolling)

→ Getting other spells than the ones your "teammates" want you to choose.

→ Helping out middle lane. (Especially any Yasuo)

→ "Stealing" a kill (eventhough gold is shared with assists).

→ Last-hitting ANY minions.

→ Killing ANY minions on another lane.

→ Getting killed by a turret.

→ Getting killed at all.

→ Trying to reason with Frenchies.

→ Trying to reason with Brazilians.

→ Trying to reason with Beaners.

→ Trying to reason with Russians.

→ Trying to communicate with the anti-social playerbase in LoL at all.

→ Being a kind and forgiving player.

→ Using common sense.

<center>'''The wisdom of [[4chan|/v/]] on League of Legends:'''</center>
<center>
{{morphquote|mqtest|background-color: lightgray;|font-weight: bold;
|... heres the truth kids: the tribunal is broken, it doesnt work, and eventually you will get a bogus ban because some troll decides to take out their frustration on you. the lol playerbase seems to have degenerated into either the most disgusting examples of human filth (ie trolls) or the most smug and obnoxious 'holier-than-thou' forum users who seems to exist for the sole purpose of kissing riots ass and bad-mouthing everyone else|
|The pressure from the toxic community, along with manipulative matchmaking system and ranking system, gives players the impression they are improving and their teammates are to blame for problems. Since the player is constantly "practicing" and seemingly "improving", mixed with the grinding aspect, the player is tricked into feeling that they are doing something productive. When in reality you are likely not improving at the game in any meaningful way & it wouldn't matter even if you were.

Source: played 2000 hours before realizing I wasn't having fun|
|League is a years-long roller coaster.
You try it at first and you might hate it because the champion pool is so small at the start and you're going to be up against smurfs 99.9% of the time and you're getting flamed for the smallest of infractions and you'll learn quickly that people have no problems just feeding the enemy team because they're mad.
Then you get a hang of it and it starts to get fun. You start understanding what champs do what and how nuanced the different lanes are. You start finding "your champ" and "your lane" and you feel like you can start to make progress.
Then as you get deeper and deeper into the game you realize how absurdly unbalanced it is and how scummy Riot Games is. You start to see the cracks in their design philosophy. Why can a 2021 champ do 8 billion things with a fifty page description on each ability while the so many other champs can have their entire kit fit on a post-it note? Why is Riot releasing a new $20 Legendary skin with 5 different phases while some other champs are rocking PS1 graphics?
Then 5 years down the line you hit a phase where you learn to either embrace the bullshit and play the scummy overpowered champs or you just stick with what you like and beat the odds through sheer force of will and practice. You start to stomp people with Teemo mid because you like Teemo or you pick Karthus botlane because you don't like playing ADCs. This is when the game is actually fun. You've become desensitized to the shitty behavior of your teammates, you learn to work around the imbalanced shit, and the meta no longer matters at your level of play. Everything can be played because you know how to make it work. That is peak League.

Should you play the game? No. It's a horrible, buggy, frustrating mess made by faggy Californians who bow to the will of China. But also yes because getting fed, becoming the finger of god, and just fucking stomping a lobby is the greatest high you can get in a video game.|
}}</center>

{{cg|Getting banned|Bannedpics|center|
<gallery>
File:Lolgettingbanned.png|Easy
File:Lolgettingbanned2.png|Watch out for his daddy!
File:Lolgettingbanned3.png|GG
File:Ban01.jpg|Randoming champions in ranked is only reserved for the cool kids in town.
</gallery>|<gallery>
File:League of Legends butthurt report.png|Butthurt
File:League of Legends - Better reported than retarded.jpg|A rule to live by!
File:League of Legends - Getting banned for reporting.png|You work too hard.
File:League of Legends - Scum rat ban.png|Twitch is such a faggot.
File:League Jammku 1.jpg|God-tier feeding
File:League Jammku 2.png|What a legend
File:League Murrica.jpg|These colors don't run, never forget
</gallery>
}}

=ELO system=
[[File:League Bronze Players.jpg|thumb|right|[[Fact]]]]
A ranking system that was meant to separate the horrible and even worse players in terms of skill and winrates (and fails pathetically at it, since everybody can just use a smurf account). Let's be real; we all know that it's mostly used to separate players in terms of how lucky or "smart" (using Duo and inviting a reliable partner) they are.

• '''Iron''' - The realm of trolls, retards, and actual children. It is practically impossible to end up here legitimately, unless you are completely new or have some kind of learning disability. The games are fun to stomp for a while, then you realize most of the players are trying to lose anyway. It is a place of legends. Anyone who re-enters it intentionally, may never leave. This league was created in 2018 to seal off the worst of the worst from the rest of the spastic community (a very useless gesture, to be honest). It is a mystery how all the retards that unintentionally ended up in this place haven't been permabanned for ruining so many ranked games before.

To get out of Iron, you just have to know the very basics of the game. Get gold and experience, don't feed and you will steadily climb.

• '''Bronze''' - Players on this level are talented enough to [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IGthbjv8qag get TRASHED by AFKs] and their CS is SO awful, they might as well farm in the jungle (eventhough the jungle monsters will PWN them as well). Sometimes they don't even think about buying, placing wards or even setting masteries. In case they do, the choices are a clusterfuck. They fail at everything and their very IQ is dropping with every game.

Merely having common sense and basic understanding about anything mentioned above is more than enough to make short work of them. However, getting OUT of Bronze is a completely different matter. Bronze 1 is the most cursed ELO one can imagine. It is without a doubt the true '''ELO hell'''. If you do not have a friend with you, or you aren't able to tryhard entire teams by yourself, you will never get out during your promotion games. The game intentionally fills your team with backstabbers, ragers, griefers, retards and children to keep you from ranking up, more so than on any other rank.

<center><youtube>X0OPx_nLuP4</youtube> '''As the video shows, there is always someone as bad as you'''</center>

• '''Silver''' - An over-glorified Bronze rank. They believe they are 1337 because they are not Bronze. Their only redeeming quality is that they can at least carry themselves in early game. Doesn't last very long though. This is basically also a prolonged ELO hell for those that managed to rank up from Bronze 1.

These players are very weak after the early game, so if you know what you're doing in the later stages, you should have no trouble attaining a decent winrate here.

• '''Gold''' - They are not that much better than Silver players. They think they know much more than they actually do. Mediocrity is the hallmark of the Gold player.

Winning in Gold is just a matter of refining your skills to an above-average level. Everything that they do can be done better, with a little effort. Tryharding is rampant.

• '''Platinum''' - The biggest egos live here, and hence the most butthurt faggots. These players will give up at the first minor mistake a teammate makes, because they all think they are playing in LCS. The mantra of the Platinum player is "''I could be Diamond whenever I want''".

To beat Platinum players you have to actually outplay them, but they are not as clean and consistent as they think and winning one fight will send the whole enemy team into an autistic spiral of rage.

• '''Diamond''' - The holy grail for most of the playerbase. Many people will stop playing ranked altogether once they reach this elo, because climbing higher is simply not worth it.

• '''Master/Grandmaster/Challenger''' - Abandon all hope, ye who enter here. Turbo-autists only. Your rank will automatically degrade if you don't play for a certain time, making the whole experience even more painful.

=Clans & eSports=

== [[feminist|Team Siren]] ==

[[image:Jenny siren.jpeg|thumb|right|Camwhore? In my A.S.S.F.A.G.G.O.T.S.?!]]

[[image:Kaceytron-cleavage.png|500px|thumb|center|Introducing the new champion: Kacy, the slut queen. [https://twitter.com/kaceytron/status/497153905735008256 If you want to see boobs you've come to the wrong place. So tired of being objectified]
]]

Well known as "that girls only team" with a totally not sexist anti-male name.

They were a shitty team hired by Riot to promote more girls to play a game that's not [[Tetris]] or [[the Sims]]. Despite having escaped the kitchen, they still spent most of their time feeding the enemy team, so it's k.

They disbanded [[last Thursday]], like nobody saw that one coming.

{{
fv|siren|margin: auto; font-weight: bold; text-align: center;|font-weight: bold;|
<youtube>SQWuRwgXM0w</youtube> '''Team Siren showing how pro they are (vs [[retards|AI]])'''|
<youtube>2kyDccrKf7A</youtube> '''How to troll them'''|
<youtube>5-Xee9Wkdjw</youtube> '''LOL RIP'''|
}}

== Vaevictis Esports ==

This was a Russian organization that couldn't fund their pro team anymore, so they replaced them all with girls as a publicity stunt. Results were immediately lulzy, with the team receiving such accolades as "fastest defeat in professional LoL" and "0-34 overall in LCL". They were so awful that Riot eventually kicked them out of competing in the LCL.

The original VODs of their matches seem to have been removed (I wonder why), so these shit quality videos are all that's left.

{{
fv|vaevictis|margin: auto; font-weight: bold; text-align: center;|font-weight: bold;|
<youtube>wPF1Z3YGjpI</youtube> '''Setting records from the beginning (skip to around 7:30 for the game)'''|
<youtube>ZnZp3SO2uzc</youtube> '''Another of their infamous matches where they died 52 times. Game starts around 3:05'''|
}}

= Riot Games wankery =

As a "world-leading" games developer, one must cause as much drama as possible. Here's a small list of Riot's exploits.

► Riot recast Jhin's voice actor, because Quinton Flynn got #cancelled, despite going to court over it and winning entirely.

► Riot also recast Taliya and possibly Ekko, because their voice actors weren't ethnic enough and this is somehow considered racist.

► Riot changed Ekko's design from a iconic mohawk to dreads going forward in the series Arcane and "Project L", because Ekko wasn't enough of a stereotype.

► Michael "Diversity Hire" Luo wrote Zeri and inserted a reference to a real life hate crime into a completely unrelated character for woke brownie points.

► Despite being known for some of the stronger character writings in the business, Riot FIRED all their good writers in one fell swoop (to hire diversity-obsessed freaks like Michael Luo), then let those new writers create the "Sentinels of Light" event, which was so bad that it's been soft-retconned THREE FUCKING TIMES since release.

► Legends of Runeterra's team is so tumultous, that they released a major announcement with focus on LoR's PVE one week, then released another major announcement the following week that they'd rather work on PVP instead.

► Luo, responsible for buttfucking all of LoL's events into minimum-viable-product grindfests left the LoL team to work on an unannounced project. He's basically going to ruin the planned MMO, too.

► Riot keeps retconning characters as gay, because no one gives a fuck about champions they wrote from the ground-up to be gay, like Rell and Neeko.

► Riot blatantly created Seraphine for skin money and retconned her lore within a week of the reveal, because people "misinterpreted" it in a way that gave her more depth, but made her less of a skin machine.

► Riot is removing the Emporium (free currency cosmetic shop) going forward, because they claimed a shop addition for two weeks a year was so taxing on their ressources, that it was making events shittier.

= Cait And Vi Sex Scene=
Long rumoured and “leaked” on [[/co/|Co]] was a sex scene between what was considered the premiere [[fap]] material the show had to offer (even though Jinx and her perma-exposed navel is way better then both of them). In Arcane season 2 after Jinx goes off to [[An hero]], Vi realizes she doesn’t give a shit and decides to stop being such a fucking [[Tease Pics|tease]] by finally going down on Cait, causing thousands of viewers dicks to explode

With Vi’s courageous act, [[Lesbians|Lesbianism]] has finally been restored to its proper role of stimulating the [[Cock|cocks]] of [[Men]]. After years of the oppressive [[Marxism|Marxist]] [[Feminist]] Dystopian Regime that true intellectual [[Sargon of Akkad]] told us we’d be living under, Men cannot help but burst at the mere sight of girl on girl action in [[current year]]. And best of all? it’s [[Aryan|ARYAN!]]

But in the end, it turns out that [[Netflix]] knew what they doing all along, setting out a [[honeypot]] in order to wipe out all the straight white men they could through orgasm induced total body shut down. The current projected /co/ poster death rate is 1 out of every 5. Following the mass exodus of the board’s most devoted porn addicts/admins, local board schizo “guy” managed to weasel his way into [[Janny]] status and change it to [[John Kricfalusi|/johnk/]].

One can only imagine how many more might’ve been died if they’d actually shown any [[Tits]]

= Gallery =

{{cg|League comics n' stuff|shit|center|
<gallery>
File:Boots.jpg|... and yet they gain a speed boost from them.
File:Lolrushuehue.png|Your worst nightmare
File:League of Legends Teemo Shrooms.gif|Duuuuuude ...
File:League Gragas.jpg|Gragas players suffer the most
</gallery>|<gallery>
File:luxcomic2.png|Lux is a very UNIQUE champion
File:Garenplaystyle.png|Garens playstyle before they fixed the sunfire cape.
File:Imwearinghim.jpg|His cruelty knows no bounds
File:Mord.jpg|Morde is stacking
File:Noose.jpg|Killstealing hurts more than you know ... which is a good thing.
File:Brhell.gif|Your worst nightmare, AGAIN. Avoid at all costs!
File:Singed.jpg|A mirror match encounter
File:Stacks.jpg|They stack!
File:League Omnibus Blitzcrank Comic.png|Staring contest
File:League Omnibus Jax Comic.png|OH SHIT
File:League Omnibus Maokai Comic.jpeg|Chucking trees like a boss
File:League Omnibus Mundo Comic 2.png|MUNDO SMASH
File:League Omnibus Mundo Comic.png|Using Ignite on Mundo
File:League Omnibus Olaf Comic.png|RUN, FUCKING RUN
File:League Omnibus Rammus Comic.png|No matter how much you ping, someone will step into it
File:League Omnibus Ryze Comic.png|Flash, can't live without it
File:League Omnibus Sona Comic.png|Sona is the most skill-intense champ
File:League Omnibus Soraka Comic.gif|Gibe monei
File:League Omnibus Teemo Comic.png|CAPTAIN TEEMO REPORTING FOR DUTY
File:League Omnibus Teemo Comic 2.png|Teemo spreads misery, one shroom at a time
File:League Omnibus Teemo Comic 3.png|High as a kite
File:League Omnibus Teemo Comic 4.png|Yeah ...
File:League Omnibus Teemo Comic 5.png|But you shouldn't try it yourself
File:League Omnibus Twitch Comic.png|God, he's such a pro
File:League Omnibus Urgot Comic.png|Pre-rework Urgot had a lot of issues
File:League Rammus Comic.png|Ok
File:League Shen Comic.png|Trying to help teammates usually ends this way
File:League Udyr Comic.png|Leaving them alone for 5 seconds also ends like this
File:League You have been slain.gif|When the ADC walks into the brush
File:leaguedownvote.jpg|New players must lose to learn, just like in any other game
File:leaguehealers.png|Morello, the "Lead Champion Designer"
File:leaguemodels.jpg|Ass, titties, ass n' titties
File:leaguereasons.jpg|This was an actual advertisement around 2009
File:League Expectation and Reality.jpg|Expectation and reality
File:League HoN player visits LoL.png|A Heroes of Newerth fag visit League of Legends
File:League Mundo Comic.png|You should always rely on your teammates
File:league of retards.jpg|Alternative title of the game, Riot thought it wasn't catchy enough
File:League Omnibus Blitzcrank & Vladimir Comic.png|Even Mundo can't smash that
File:League Omnibus Blitzcrank and Annie Comic.png|Blitz has had enough of your shit
File:league of legends taco taco ban.jpg|Getting banned before it was cool
File:Grass001.jpg|Hiding in the brush, always useful
File:LeBlanc_lezzing.jpg|LeBlanc about to fuck herself
File:Demacia.png|DEMACIAAAAAAAAA!
File:Dotavslol.jpg|Hero design differences
File:Dota2league.png|DotA 2 vs LoL
File:Loldota2.png|A League players tries Dota 2
File:Dravenmicro.jpg|GO CATCH THE AXE!
File:Gank.png|Getting ganked by Twisted Fate
File:Leagueisfun.png|LoL is fun!
File:Burningagony.jpg|A very useful ability.
File:Lux and teemo by zaziky.jpg|A few moments later she died of malnutrition.
File:Tryndcomic.jpg|Thankfully Gragas helped him with that problem.
File:Typicallol.jpg|Riot pls nerf
File:Typicallolaudience.jpg|The audience this game was made for.
File:Blitzcrank1.jpg|He always does.
File:Blitzcrank2.png|That's my boy!
File:Blitzcrankfreeweek.png|When Blitzcrank is free to try
File:Twistedfate.png|Playing Twisted Fate is true suffering
File:Balanced.jpg|NOT PAY 2 WIN, NUH-UH!
File:Riotoverwatch.jpg|Riot's policies
File:Riot01.jpg|TL,DR RIOT IS SHIT AT GAME DESIGN
File:Shen.png|Azns are obsessed with Sona
File:Mobas.jpg|DotA, HoN and LoL in comparison
File:Mundo.png|Sometimes he just can't go where he pleases
File:Ggevolution.jpg|Applicable to every multiplayer game ever made
File:Horribledesign.jpg|Horrible armor designs and massive tits = League of Legends
File:Lux plus Garen Combo.jpg|Sadly not possible yet
File:Oursaviourteemo.jpg|Teemo - our lord, our saviour.
File:League of Legends - A masterpiece on wings.png|A masterpiece on wings
File:League of Legends Skarner Comic.png|Skarner is quite the brains behind this operation.
File:League of Legends Crossdressing.png|Crossdressing Renekton
File:League of Legends Anvia Doug Rape Comic.png|Hoo Hoo!
File:This is why you should wear armor you dumb bitch.jpg|Riots titty-flashing design has some problems apparently.
File:League of Legends - Champion Pricing.jpg|Grinding like hell.
File:League of Legends Chogath.jpg|People's reaction to Cho'Gath
File:League of Legends - Counter Yorick.png|How to counter Yorick
File:League of Legends - Sub human plebs.png|DotA vs League players
File:League of Legends - Fiddle and Blitzcrank.jpg|Fiddle vs Blitzcrank
File:League of Legends - Fiddlestick 1.png|Playing Fiddle requires situational awareness
File:League of Legends - Fiddlestick 2.jpg|Fiddle and the bird
File:League of Legends - Elise.jpg|Tits matter
File:League of Legends - Garen.png|Garen & sun capes
File:League of Legends - Gangplank.png|Pirate man vs hipster Phoenix
File:League of Legends - Mordekaiser musician.jpg|He's a MUSICIAN
File:League of Legends - Mundo Solo Mid.jpg|MUNDO SOLO MID, LOL
File:League of Legends - Originality.jpg|League is very original, as always
File:League of Legends - Pantheon.png|Every single Pantheon player does this
File:League of Legends - Progamers.jpg|HEAD TO HEAD
File:League of Legends - Progamers 2.png|Who uploaded this crap?
File:League of Legends - Repetition.png|Repetition
File:League of Legends - Riot 1.jpg|More on Riot's design philosophy
File:League of Legends - Riot on flash spell abuse.png|Don't fix what's broken!
File:League of Legends - Riot on Shaco.png|Riot on Shaco
File:League of Legends - Shen Comic.png|Shen to the rescue!
File:League of Legends - Sick of Riot.jpg|Riot's bullshit as usual
File:League of Legends - Snowballing.jpg|Snowballing
File:League of Legends - Stream Sabotage.jpg|Stream sabotage
File:League of Legends - Suprise Motherfucker.jpg|Surprise motherfucker!
File:League of Legends - Taric.png|"Ooh Mister Taric" - A fan fiction
File:League of Legends - Teemo and Skill.jpg|Teemo and skill
File:League of Legends - Trundle Design.jpg|Trundle was a mistake
File:League of Legends - Xerath Jungle.png|NO, YOU'RE NOT GOING JUNGLE
File:League of Legends - Horrible Art design choices.jpg|Left side fixed - right side original
File:It'safuckingconspiracy.jpg|It's all just a [[Worldwide Masonic Conspiracy|GOD DAMN CONSPIRACY!]]

</gallery>
}}

{{cg|Rule 34|Pornontheinternets|center|
<gallery>
File:Rule34lol.jpg|<center>fap fap fap fap fap
File:League_of_Losers_r34_orgy.jpg|Safe for work orgy, lul
File:Lux_Vel'Koz_tentacle.jpg|It was inevitable
File:Leagueyordles.png|How to deal with Yordles
</gallery>|<gallery>
</gallery>
}}

= Related Articles =
*[[DotA]] - The reason why RTS is dead. This article also lists other games.
*[[Tencent]] - The actual company behind League of Losers that pulls all the strings
*[[Warcraft_3|WarCraft 3]] - The unfortunate victim of DotA and its offspring.
*[[Shit]] - This game, obviously.
*[[Basement-dweller|Basement Dwellers]] - Every single person that plays '''A.S.S.F.A.G.G.O.T.S.'''.
*[[Gamer_Countries|Gamer Countries]] - All the international feeders, whiners, backstabbers & cunts you will meet in this game.
*[[Copyright]] - What this game will soon be destroyed by.
*[[Warhammer 40k]] - Gameworkshop just called, they take back what they said about StarCraft, because this game is beyond the shits of unoriginal.
*[[Asian]] - 90% of the population in this game.
*[[Korean]]

= External Links =
*[http://leagueoflegends.com Get this horribad game here]
*[http://www.dota2.com A challenger appears!]
*[http://www.gamespot.com//news/us-government-recognizes-league-of-legends-players-as-pro-athletes-6411377?part=rss&tag=gs_news&subj=6411377 Get a visa for playing this horribad game]
{{Timeline|Featured article August 31 & September 1, [[2013]]|[[PRISM]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[SIDS]]}}
{{Timeline|Featured article October 10 through October 13, [[2021]]|[[Hiroshima and Nagasaki]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Halloween (franchise)]]}}
{{gaming}}

{{Dying Alone}}

Good Korea

2026-05-15T10:18:44Z

Gooksu: /* US Military in Good Korea */

{{Spoilers|SOUTH KOREA HATES SEOUL NOW AND THEY ARE MOVING THEIR CAPITAL TO SEJONG CITY IN 2030}}
{{breakingnews|[https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-67920167 South Korea BANS Dog Eeat]}}
[[File:SamsungcideBomber.jpg|right|thumb|Good Korea's main export]]
{{distinguish|Best Korea}}

'''Good Korea''' (or combined as one word is [[Gorea]]) is an American colony much like Puerto Rico. This is not ironic or in any way in line with ED, it's a just a fact missing from Wikipedia: South Korea is no more sovereign than Puerto Rico. Their army is directly under command of the American Army and their first president was an American Hawaiian military dictator.
Good Korea was one of the [[United States]]' 20th century acquisitions in accordance with the long-term [[Manifest Destiny]].

== Geography ==

Good Korea is immediately south of [[Best Korea]], on the bottom half of a peninsula that is west of [[Japan]]. It has water on both sides. It is a very convenient place for throwing things into [[Best Korea]]. It used to have some good surf beaches, but now they are rather untidy.

== People ==

[[Image:RaelKoreanBlackface.jpg|thumb|Sometimes uppity Koreans show support for the [[niggers]]]]
[[Image:SK military.jpg|thumb|Capitalist, why don't you feed your people?]]

South Koreans belong to a Conservative culture which respects traditional values. The typical South Korean belongs to some or another shady Baptist Church founded in California in the 50s. Since both men and women work long hours for one or another service corporation, and [[nazi|there are no immigrants]], they have more Mc Donalds per capita than any other country in the World, so they can enjoy their traditional food at any time prepared by robots. A dog market exists in Seoul to entertain tourists and help Animal Rights organizations whitewash money. South Korean men like to play golf in their spare time and get drunk with Single Malt Scotch, their traditional spirit. South Korean women like to repeatedly get plastic surgery in their eyelids. Children pass times include math, Starcraft, and studying English to purge themselves of their mother tongue before they are six. Korean girls have become ruthless [[feminist]] gold diggers who will only use the men for money then leave them to die off once they have outlived their usefulness. But despite being feminists Korean women crave the slightly bigger White cock or the [[lie|giant]] [[The Great Black Dick Hoax|Black Cock]] and are completely submissive to [[White]] and Black men.
{{center|{{frame|<youtube>Lf_sEGjC9_4</youtube><center>'''Typical Korean [[Christians]] harass people in public, and are often known as [[gay|gae]][[dog|doks.]]'''</center>}}}}
[[Image:halkas.jpg|thumb|Typical korean [[granny]]]]
[[Image:Dongduk.jpg|thumb|Typical Korean Feminists' Protest Method]]

== Government ==

Good Korea is a suzerain state of the USA, kind of an unincorporated territory. Every five years a new Governor is appointed by the United States Pacific Command. A Reality Show is broadcasted and fake elections are held in a farcical show of moral superiority to the People's Republic of Korea. The subjects are expected to pay for and take part in these celebrations.
Basic freedom of speech or demonstration are forbidden in Good Korea when it touches on political topics: the internalization of this prohibition into self-censorship is what makes them good in the first place.

== Occultism ==

South Korea's first female president and former symbolic first lady [[Wikipedia:Park Geun-hye|Park Geun-Hye]], who won the election through military interference, <s>is under [[Truth|investigation]]</s> [https://www.straitstimes.com/asia/east-asia/south-korea-ex-president-park-geun-hye-leaves-jail-for-medical-care LOL the capricious prostitute got 24 years] for conducting occult rituals and being linked to fortune teller [[Wikipedia:Choi Soon-sil|Choi Soon-sil]], her "shaman adviser" and rumored [[lesbian]] confidante who has been in Park's inner circle since 1994. Choi's father was the shamanistic cult leader [[Wikipedia:Choi Tae-min|Choi Tae-min]] of the Eternal World Religion, who told Park he could channel her dead mother [[Wikipedia:Yuk Young-soo|Yuk Young-soo]], who was assassinated in 1974 by a [[North Korea]]n sympathizer trying to shoot Park's father, South Korean military dictator [[Wikipedia:Park Chung-hee|Park Chung-hee]], who was assassinated in 1979 by the director of his security agency for failing to keep Choi away from his daughter Geun-Hye. From an office in the Non-Hyun [[Dong]] neighborhood, spirits told Choi Soon-sil that North Korea would soon collapse, Choi rewrote Park's speeches to be more shaman-y, she created some corrupt foundations, and Choi had a tablet with secret policy documents on it. On [[Halloween]] 2016, Choi Soon-sil said "I'm sorry. I committed a sin that deserves death." Park Geun-Hye said "it is not true that I am a cult follower and practised shamanistic rituals at the presidential Blue House." '''[[You]]''' can't make this shit up. Stick to [[Starcraft]] and [[Dota2]] South Korea. Currently, after Park Geun-hye, the worst president, [[Wikipedia:Moon Jae-in|Moon Jae-in]]{{Communist}}, the worst anti-American president, \politics like shit. The nickname in Korea is Moon Apocalypse. However, there is hope because all Koreans, With the exception of Moon Jae-in's fanatical supporters, most Koreans hate Moon Jae-in and the Korean opposition party, Power of the People, is in power. After 2022, [[Yoon Suk Yeol]] replaced the regime. After Yoon Suk Yeol was impeached, as of 2026, the president is Lee Jae-myung{{Communist}}.

[[Image:Leejaiming.jpg|thumb|As of 2026, the president of Korea is a puppet of China.]]

== Economy ==

You can make a lotta lotta money in Good Korea. Make sure your mutual funds and IRAs include Good Korean companies. If you can't get a job where you are despite owning a suit, you can be a highly paid English-speaking [[monkey]] to entertain their small children ([https://youtu.be/dXakC04KFz0?t=1391 but only if you're white]). Many Good Koreans might be confused because [[white people]] (like Alan Alda and Jamie Farr) look good in movies and [[you]] don't. But don't worry! They will never fire you no matter how fat, gross, diseased, and lazy you are. And don't forget, although [[Raelian|Raël]] may be [[Perma-ban|banned]] in Korea, he still needs your 10 percent.

Internationally, Good Korea releases [[MMORPG]]s for free, which are usually awful, even by MMORPG standards. Kids will actually pay for extra, useless features on this shit, which will normally make their character look more like a [[fag]] or [[weeaboo]]. The profit Good Korea makes on this faggotry is uncertain, though it could be over 20% of their economy.

[[Image:Japracist.jpg|thumb|Unlike [[Japan|this]] sign, this only exists in Japan and Taiwan.]]

Gorea is trying to take over the world by making and releasing free shitty gay TV Drama + K-poop featuring post-plastic-surgery pretty boys and girls, but no one gave a shit except for a few pathetic [[Koreaboo]]s in South East Asia.

==US Military in Good Korea==
If you are serving in the military, please take advantage of the many prostitutes that populate the red light district. <s>Remember, though: Koreans hate any and all United States soldiers, so avoid asking questions, unless you would like to contribute to the Korean national pastime (other than ''Starcraft''): Blankly staring and giggling.</s>

but after 2015 Now, thanks to the atrocities of China, I like the US and the US military.

Good Koreans are famously hard workers.

It is a known fact that [[Cho Seung-Hui|a Korean cannot kill more than 33 people without killing him or herself.]]

== How to Troll Good Korea ==
* Tell them Korea owes all its Jew to their Japanese Masters.
* Call kimchi a kimuchi.
* Call anyone with [KOR] or [KR] in their IGNs a Kimchiman.
* Describe their country as a big factory
* Congratulate them on being the country that produces and consumes more steel per capita in the World! Segway casually to suicide rates.
* Point out that North Koreans don't have as many prostitute daughters and gamer and asperger sons because they are free to get daily fresh air, community exercise and don't live in a steel and concrete digital sweatshop.
* Point out that eating dog is a disgusting habit not merited by culture since North Koreans would rather starve than eat dog.
* [[shit nobody cares about|Tell them Dokdo belongs to japan.]]
* Make fun of ''Starcraft'' or any of the shitty MMORPGs or MMOFPS they dedicate their worthless lives on.
** Say that worker rushing sucks and only shows that they have a small dick.
* Tell them [[your mom|comfort women]] did 9/11.
* Tell them [[fact|Japan is better]].
* Tell them that their country has a rich, long history of being buttraped and under the control of other countries to such an extent that they have no distinct individual culture.
* Say hello to them on the streets. This will cause them to lock up into a giggling fit of fear.
* [[Fan death|Lock them in a room with a fan turned on because they seriously believe that stupid shit]].
* Be [[Kim Jong Il]].
* Remind them that a lot more so than Japan, South Korea is now America's bitch.
* Remind them that the only sovereign Korean country with its armed forces not directly under the command of a foreign power is the ''Democratic'' ''People's'' Republic of Korea, not their slave puppet state. If they don't remember tell them to just [http://www.globalresearch.ca/south-koreas-armed-forces-to-remain-fully-under-us-military-command/5410849 look it up]
* To add insult to injury, remind them that whereas Japan at least put up a fight before becoming America's butt buddy, South Korea bent over willingly to let America rape them.
** If they do it willingly, it's not rape. Then they're just being fags.
* Tell them that they're the only country in the world where going to the military for 2 years is the only way to become a man. Extra lulz if you mention that most of the time there is spent sucking their CO's cocks and doing their chores while they get $100 a month.
* For more lulz, mistake them for [[japs]].
* Inform an older Korean man that yes, there are gay Koreans.
* Tell them their national soccer team is shitty.
* Convince people Samsung is a Japanese company.
* Remind them that all their good looking women are a product of extensive plastic surgery.

== gallary ==

{{cg|South korea|Gallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Ugly south korean.png|thumb|Good Korea has to Face it: Their [[wimminz]] are ugly
File:Koreanfeminazi.jpg|thumb|Typical korean [[feminazi]] lulz
File:Typicalkoreafemi.jpg|typical [[korean]] feminazi 2
Image:856653883_e0b6ce3eef_o.jpg|thumb|300px|A typical pub in South Korea. Absolutely NOT related to the flag of Korea
Image:sweatshop.jpg|thumb|<s>Good Koreans are famously hard workers. This boy likes his job so much he'll work for less than a cent an hour!!</s> It's China
Image:Boiled alive dogs asians.jpg|thumb|Another reason why south Korea is inferior to [[North Korea|best one]]
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:ChineseCarryOut.jpg|Ancient traditional korean method of [[child abuse|transportation]]
Image:Koreanoparty.jpg|thumb|Looks like no one stuck around to clean up after the party
File:South korean ilustrator kidmos art .jpg|thumb|Korean [[Hentai]]
</gallery>}} 

== See also ==

* [[Johnny Somali]]
* [[Korean]] <s>stereotypes</s> [[fact|FACTS]]
* [[Sarah Jeong]]
* [[PSY]]
* [[Yoon Suk Yeol]]
* [[Squid Game]]
* [[BTS]]
* [[K-pop]]
* [[Chan Ho Park]]
* [[Woo Bum-kon]]

== External links ==

* [http://www.unwiredview.com/2012/04/20/south-korea-to-ban-cameraphone-shutter-sound-removers/# An example of the moral-faggotry endemic to South Korea.]
* [https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2023/5/17/pig-heads-bbqs-mosque-backlash-tests-s-korea-religious-freedom/# South koreans know how to handle sand nigger.]

== Korean evaluation ==

It's a little exaggerated, but some of it was funny lol.

{{Politics}}
{{Commonwealth}}
{{azn}}
{{Korea}}
{{timeline|Featured article December 28 & 29, [[2024]]|[[Ryan's World]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Hawk Tuah]]}}
[[Category:Countries]]

Good Korea

2026-05-15T10:17:59Z

Gooksu: /* US Military in Good Korea */

{{Spoilers|SOUTH KOREA HATES SEOUL NOW AND THEY ARE MOVING THEIR CAPITAL TO SEJONG CITY IN 2030}}
{{breakingnews|[https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-67920167 South Korea BANS Dog Eeat]}}
[[File:SamsungcideBomber.jpg|right|thumb|Good Korea's main export]]
{{distinguish|Best Korea}}

'''Good Korea''' (or combined as one word is [[Gorea]]) is an American colony much like Puerto Rico. This is not ironic or in any way in line with ED, it's a just a fact missing from Wikipedia: South Korea is no more sovereign than Puerto Rico. Their army is directly under command of the American Army and their first president was an American Hawaiian military dictator.
Good Korea was one of the [[United States]]' 20th century acquisitions in accordance with the long-term [[Manifest Destiny]].

== Geography ==

Good Korea is immediately south of [[Best Korea]], on the bottom half of a peninsula that is west of [[Japan]]. It has water on both sides. It is a very convenient place for throwing things into [[Best Korea]]. It used to have some good surf beaches, but now they are rather untidy.

== People ==

[[Image:RaelKoreanBlackface.jpg|thumb|Sometimes uppity Koreans show support for the [[niggers]]]]
[[Image:SK military.jpg|thumb|Capitalist, why don't you feed your people?]]

South Koreans belong to a Conservative culture which respects traditional values. The typical South Korean belongs to some or another shady Baptist Church founded in California in the 50s. Since both men and women work long hours for one or another service corporation, and [[nazi|there are no immigrants]], they have more Mc Donalds per capita than any other country in the World, so they can enjoy their traditional food at any time prepared by robots. A dog market exists in Seoul to entertain tourists and help Animal Rights organizations whitewash money. South Korean men like to play golf in their spare time and get drunk with Single Malt Scotch, their traditional spirit. South Korean women like to repeatedly get plastic surgery in their eyelids. Children pass times include math, Starcraft, and studying English to purge themselves of their mother tongue before they are six. Korean girls have become ruthless [[feminist]] gold diggers who will only use the men for money then leave them to die off once they have outlived their usefulness. But despite being feminists Korean women crave the slightly bigger White cock or the [[lie|giant]] [[The Great Black Dick Hoax|Black Cock]] and are completely submissive to [[White]] and Black men.
{{center|{{frame|<youtube>Lf_sEGjC9_4</youtube><center>'''Typical Korean [[Christians]] harass people in public, and are often known as [[gay|gae]][[dog|doks.]]'''</center>}}}}
[[Image:halkas.jpg|thumb|Typical korean [[granny]]]]
[[Image:Dongduk.jpg|thumb|Typical Korean Feminists' Protest Method]]

== Government ==

Good Korea is a suzerain state of the USA, kind of an unincorporated territory. Every five years a new Governor is appointed by the United States Pacific Command. A Reality Show is broadcasted and fake elections are held in a farcical show of moral superiority to the People's Republic of Korea. The subjects are expected to pay for and take part in these celebrations.
Basic freedom of speech or demonstration are forbidden in Good Korea when it touches on political topics: the internalization of this prohibition into self-censorship is what makes them good in the first place.

== Occultism ==

South Korea's first female president and former symbolic first lady [[Wikipedia:Park Geun-hye|Park Geun-Hye]], who won the election through military interference, <s>is under [[Truth|investigation]]</s> [https://www.straitstimes.com/asia/east-asia/south-korea-ex-president-park-geun-hye-leaves-jail-for-medical-care LOL the capricious prostitute got 24 years] for conducting occult rituals and being linked to fortune teller [[Wikipedia:Choi Soon-sil|Choi Soon-sil]], her "shaman adviser" and rumored [[lesbian]] confidante who has been in Park's inner circle since 1994. Choi's father was the shamanistic cult leader [[Wikipedia:Choi Tae-min|Choi Tae-min]] of the Eternal World Religion, who told Park he could channel her dead mother [[Wikipedia:Yuk Young-soo|Yuk Young-soo]], who was assassinated in 1974 by a [[North Korea]]n sympathizer trying to shoot Park's father, South Korean military dictator [[Wikipedia:Park Chung-hee|Park Chung-hee]], who was assassinated in 1979 by the director of his security agency for failing to keep Choi away from his daughter Geun-Hye. From an office in the Non-Hyun [[Dong]] neighborhood, spirits told Choi Soon-sil that North Korea would soon collapse, Choi rewrote Park's speeches to be more shaman-y, she created some corrupt foundations, and Choi had a tablet with secret policy documents on it. On [[Halloween]] 2016, Choi Soon-sil said "I'm sorry. I committed a sin that deserves death." Park Geun-Hye said "it is not true that I am a cult follower and practised shamanistic rituals at the presidential Blue House." '''[[You]]''' can't make this shit up. Stick to [[Starcraft]] and [[Dota2]] South Korea. Currently, after Park Geun-hye, the worst president, [[Wikipedia:Moon Jae-in|Moon Jae-in]]{{Communist}}, the worst anti-American president, \politics like shit. The nickname in Korea is Moon Apocalypse. However, there is hope because all Koreans, With the exception of Moon Jae-in's fanatical supporters, most Koreans hate Moon Jae-in and the Korean opposition party, Power of the People, is in power. After 2022, [[Yoon Suk Yeol]] replaced the regime. After Yoon Suk Yeol was impeached, as of 2026, the president is Lee Jae-myung{{Communist}}.

[[Image:Leejaiming.jpg|thumb|As of 2026, the president of Korea is a puppet of China.]]

== Economy ==

You can make a lotta lotta money in Good Korea. Make sure your mutual funds and IRAs include Good Korean companies. If you can't get a job where you are despite owning a suit, you can be a highly paid English-speaking [[monkey]] to entertain their small children ([https://youtu.be/dXakC04KFz0?t=1391 but only if you're white]). Many Good Koreans might be confused because [[white people]] (like Alan Alda and Jamie Farr) look good in movies and [[you]] don't. But don't worry! They will never fire you no matter how fat, gross, diseased, and lazy you are. And don't forget, although [[Raelian|Raël]] may be [[Perma-ban|banned]] in Korea, he still needs your 10 percent.

Internationally, Good Korea releases [[MMORPG]]s for free, which are usually awful, even by MMORPG standards. Kids will actually pay for extra, useless features on this shit, which will normally make their character look more like a [[fag]] or [[weeaboo]]. The profit Good Korea makes on this faggotry is uncertain, though it could be over 20% of their economy.

[[Image:Japracist.jpg|thumb|Unlike [[Japan|this]] sign, this only exists in Japan and Taiwan.]]

Gorea is trying to take over the world by making and releasing free shitty gay TV Drama + K-poop featuring post-plastic-surgery pretty boys and girls, but no one gave a shit except for a few pathetic [[Koreaboo]]s in South East Asia.

==US Military in Good Korea==
If you are serving in the military, please take advantage of the many prostitutes that populate the red light district. Remember, <s>though: Koreans hate any and all United States soldiers, so avoid asking questions, unless you would like to contribute to the Korean national pastime (other than ''Starcraft''): Blankly staring and giggling.</s>

but after 2015 Now, thanks to the atrocities of China, I like the US and the US military.Good Koreans are famously hard workers.

It is a known fact that [[Cho Seung-Hui|a Korean cannot kill more than 33 people without killing him or herself.]]

== How to Troll Good Korea ==
* Tell them Korea owes all its Jew to their Japanese Masters.
* Call kimchi a kimuchi.
* Call anyone with [KOR] or [KR] in their IGNs a Kimchiman.
* Describe their country as a big factory
* Congratulate them on being the country that produces and consumes more steel per capita in the World! Segway casually to suicide rates.
* Point out that North Koreans don't have as many prostitute daughters and gamer and asperger sons because they are free to get daily fresh air, community exercise and don't live in a steel and concrete digital sweatshop.
* Point out that eating dog is a disgusting habit not merited by culture since North Koreans would rather starve than eat dog.
* [[shit nobody cares about|Tell them Dokdo belongs to japan.]]
* Make fun of ''Starcraft'' or any of the shitty MMORPGs or MMOFPS they dedicate their worthless lives on.
** Say that worker rushing sucks and only shows that they have a small dick.
* Tell them [[your mom|comfort women]] did 9/11.
* Tell them [[fact|Japan is better]].
* Tell them that their country has a rich, long history of being buttraped and under the control of other countries to such an extent that they have no distinct individual culture.
* Say hello to them on the streets. This will cause them to lock up into a giggling fit of fear.
* [[Fan death|Lock them in a room with a fan turned on because they seriously believe that stupid shit]].
* Be [[Kim Jong Il]].
* Remind them that a lot more so than Japan, South Korea is now America's bitch.
* Remind them that the only sovereign Korean country with its armed forces not directly under the command of a foreign power is the ''Democratic'' ''People's'' Republic of Korea, not their slave puppet state. If they don't remember tell them to just [http://www.globalresearch.ca/south-koreas-armed-forces-to-remain-fully-under-us-military-command/5410849 look it up]
* To add insult to injury, remind them that whereas Japan at least put up a fight before becoming America's butt buddy, South Korea bent over willingly to let America rape them.
** If they do it willingly, it's not rape. Then they're just being fags.
* Tell them that they're the only country in the world where going to the military for 2 years is the only way to become a man. Extra lulz if you mention that most of the time there is spent sucking their CO's cocks and doing their chores while they get $100 a month.
* For more lulz, mistake them for [[japs]].
* Inform an older Korean man that yes, there are gay Koreans.
* Tell them their national soccer team is shitty.
* Convince people Samsung is a Japanese company.
* Remind them that all their good looking women are a product of extensive plastic surgery.

== gallary ==

{{cg|South korea|Gallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Ugly south korean.png|thumb|Good Korea has to Face it: Their [[wimminz]] are ugly
File:Koreanfeminazi.jpg|thumb|Typical korean [[feminazi]] lulz
File:Typicalkoreafemi.jpg|typical [[korean]] feminazi 2
Image:856653883_e0b6ce3eef_o.jpg|thumb|300px|A typical pub in South Korea. Absolutely NOT related to the flag of Korea
Image:sweatshop.jpg|thumb|<s>Good Koreans are famously hard workers. This boy likes his job so much he'll work for less than a cent an hour!!</s> It's China
Image:Boiled alive dogs asians.jpg|thumb|Another reason why south Korea is inferior to [[North Korea|best one]]
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:ChineseCarryOut.jpg|Ancient traditional korean method of [[child abuse|transportation]]
Image:Koreanoparty.jpg|thumb|Looks like no one stuck around to clean up after the party
File:South korean ilustrator kidmos art .jpg|thumb|Korean [[Hentai]]
</gallery>}} 

== See also ==

* [[Johnny Somali]]
* [[Korean]] <s>stereotypes</s> [[fact|FACTS]]
* [[Sarah Jeong]]
* [[PSY]]
* [[Yoon Suk Yeol]]
* [[Squid Game]]
* [[BTS]]
* [[K-pop]]
* [[Chan Ho Park]]
* [[Woo Bum-kon]]

== External links ==

* [http://www.unwiredview.com/2012/04/20/south-korea-to-ban-cameraphone-shutter-sound-removers/# An example of the moral-faggotry endemic to South Korea.]
* [https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2023/5/17/pig-heads-bbqs-mosque-backlash-tests-s-korea-religious-freedom/# South koreans know how to handle sand nigger.]

== Korean evaluation ==

It's a little exaggerated, but some of it was funny lol.

{{Politics}}
{{Commonwealth}}
{{azn}}
{{Korea}}
{{timeline|Featured article December 28 & 29, [[2024]]|[[Ryan's World]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Hawk Tuah]]}}
[[Category:Countries]]

Feminism

2026-05-15T10:12:48Z

Gooksu: /* Gallery */

{{tldr}}
{{offended}}
{{spoiler|women can make their own decisions and don't need to be "liberated" by overzealous, naive dykes}}
<center>[[File:Feminazi.png|300px]][[Image:Feministlol.jpg|300px]]</center>

[[File:Feminism_-_Robot.png|thumb|right]]
[[File:Angler fish symbol of feminism.jpg|thumb|The international symbol of feminism: A hideous [[vagina dentata]] that does nothing but eat, and [http://mentalfloss.com/article/57800/horrors-anglerfish-mating absorbs the far smaller male into its body] so it never has to have sex.]]
[[Image:Feminists_no_means_no.png|thumb|[[I'm so confused|Is this for or against feminism?]].]]
[[Image:feminismvswomensactivism.jpg|thumb|Good to know.]]
[[File:Fellow feminazi duke.jpeg|thumb|Fellow feminazi duke, sieg heil to the era of testes holocaust!]]
[[File:Feminazi-final.jpg|thumb]]
[[File:Feminazi poster of pride.jpg|thumb|Feminazi poster of pride - a must have in every femi's basement/nazi bunker.]]
[[File:Thefaminaziarmy.JPG|thumb|They sure will fuck your cock, after they cut it off first.]]
[[Image:Feminismwaves.png|thumb|right|400px|From philosophy to insanity. What the fuck happened?]]
[[File:Gender Sympathy Gap.png|thumb|right| "Us women are so oppressed! Politicians don't care about us at all!"]]
[[File:Gender equality in 1917.png|thumb|Gender equality in 1917]]

'''Feminism''' (also known as dick envy) is a mental disorder that affects [[Women|women]] who lack the antibodies found in human male sperm, i.e., single females and [[Lesbian|lesbians]]. Some victims of chronic feminism have been mutated to resemble rabid, mindless, and extremely violent canines or gigantic landwhales that kill every form of life around them with their vagina stink. However, because of our modern, politically-correct society, everybody now pretends that feminism (or more like FAILminism, amirite?) is not a mental illness, but rather some sort of "philosophy" that promotes "absolute equality between men and women," and because it's "inherent" and "natural," it should not be attempted to be cured or treated, employing the same position with the issue of autism.

Any attempts to cure feminists are ridiculed and persecuted as "misogynistic patriarchs," just as compassionate people who promote euthanasia and end the suffering of autistic people are immediately condemned for "nazism" and shot on sight. As a result, what was once a respectable medical diagnosis has primarily become an excuse for misandry and spoiled brats abusing hardworking males whenever they want, because women should be "strong," "assertive," and "liberated" (in other words, insufferable bitches). Without understanding or reading the actual philosophy behind gender equality, the vast majority of these so-called "feminists" are radicalized. Too inept, callous, or lazy to do actual research, they cherry-pick incomplete evidence or ignore it altogether. Feminism is also the idea that we can make both sexes equal by focusing solely on the issues of one of them.

Feminists are contradictory because they are the loudest, most vocal evidence of the differences between men and women. They go around trying to coin "gender neutral" words by putting Xs in everything and spewing variations of the phrase "We can do it!". The main difference between the sexes is that men never have vaginal envy, not even gay men, because that's how much it rocks to have dick and balls. No one actually believes this feminist drivel, not even the feminists themselves. If they did, they'd be protesting for women to register for the draft.

Feminists will never be satisfied no matter how much legal, political, social, and economic superiority is granted to them over men. If the "philosophy" of feminism was genuine, it would have disappeared when discrimination against women ended a long time ago, and feminists in the west would have celebrated by shaving their arm pits. But again, feminism is not a philosophy. It is a mental disease.

==Symptoms of Feminism==

Symptoms include:

*infertility
*uterine damage
*encephalitis (chronic rabies)
*adrenaline overdose (magnifying their already-aggressive amygdalas by [[Over_9000|OVER 9000]])
*severe allergy to males
*sudden mental retardation
*becoming the autism
*endocrine dysfunction
*obesity
*becoming a ‘lessbeiany’ (whatever the fuck that is)
*[[diabetes]],
*excessive growth of body hair, especially in the armpits and chin area
*acidic body odour
*[[vagina dentata]]
*breast cancer
*cervical cancer
*ovarian cancer
*brain cancer
*[[cancer]] in general
*paranoid schizophrenia
*[[The Man]]isouttorapemephobia

==Radical Feminism==

Radical feminism is a [[terrorist]] hate group disguised as liberal egalitarianism, practiced mainly by morbidly obese landwhales who resent their biological inferiority while suffering from penis and beauty envy that generally believe that society is ruled by a patriarchy against numerous mountains of evidence that prove the contrary and at the same time, amusingly want to build exactly the same social system they oppose by creating a matriarchy, which ironically already exists in the Modern First World that treats men and boys as the "Expendable Gender" that only exists to work and die 24/7 for the females, emulating the insectoid lifestyle in contradiction to our mammalian biology.

In the biological history of mammalian evolution, feminism is a complete and utter contradiction to our own genetic structure. We are not spiders whose males are eaten after sex by females who can abandon hundreds of their eggs in a random location. For mammals such as humans to develop intelligence, the female must be drained of all her resources, reducing her to an incubator. This means the responsibility of protecting one's species, including developing muscles and using one's brain to create what we know as human civilization, falls on the male. Since the first vertebrate emerged from the oceans into life on land, this was the standard as it had always been. This is why feminism is so dangerous to humans, and it only proves the old adage that mammalian women are most efficient in two areas: homemaking and servitude to the dick.

In a truly patriarchal world they would have all been incarcerated in psychiatric hospitals and cured of their infection, proving once and for all that their main belief is bullshit.

===== History =====
Considering that even a cursory look at the history of the feminist movement reveals a massively disproportionate number of [[lesbians]] involved in feminism, and it all becomes rather [http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/spoopy-skeletons spoopy] "Feminists" attempt to create a socially acceptable lifestyle for lesbians (a career, no husband, no kids, girl-on-girl domestic violence). However, this original template for lesbian emancipation as applied to all women means that straight women now step out of high school or university and straight into 40 years of non-stop wage slavery. They sometimes forego marriage/children to cope, and [[die alone|die a lonely death]], with their [https://archive.is/0ooHg body eventually eaten by their pet cats].

One can identify when a female is in the beginning stages of feminism meltdown, when her pussy gets dry like the Sahara, her boobs get saggy like Niagara Falls, her menstruation is like drain cleaners' depressed faggots' drink to die, and her face becomes even more of an abomination unto God. They like to mindlessly blabber and flap their disproportional arms, arbitrarily forbidding everyone from living their life as they please. This is because they possess neither the brilliance nor the beauty to get anywhere in their own lives.

===== The [[Autism|Spectrum]] =====

[http://web.archive.org/web/20100107094622/http://www.triplestarnews.com/images/woman/feminazis/femi.html Feminists] come in many extremes, just like their "our-bitches-'n'-whores-wives-are-fucking-insane!" male counterparts, [[Men's Rights Activist|Men Rights Activists]]. At one end of the spectrum are the "grrl power" types, who've watched too many ''Sex and the City'' reruns and think feminism means fucking a lot and getting men to buy them jewelry; at the other end are the Valerie Solanas fanwomyn, who dream of someday shooting a talentless fag patriarch in a bad wig.

It should also be noted that feminists will often wear badges that they got from their wimmins gyms with slogans such as "don't assume I cook," even though feminists want to be independent, so they would need to know how to cook to survive.

[[Japan]], [[Europe]], and [[America]], their sexual and familial activities all sterilized and dead, and their native populations dying out like a Plague Inc. game. Europe's population is currently being replaced by an invasion of [[Islam]], while the Japs have already accepted mass suicide via [[Animu]]. If Madagascar doesn't figure out a cure, then say goodbye to '''MAN'''kind and '''HIS'''tory. Forever.

==== [[Jews]] ====

A casual [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_feminist_literature#1960s survey of the literature] will persuade you that the most pestilent, strident, man-hating feminists are Jews. The ones that insist that all men are pigs, that men should be killed, that every man is a rapist. Actually - it's more than that. Pretty much every important feminist writer is a Jewess. Check out the original surname (Jews like wearing masks), or follow the links in [[Wikipedia|Wikipedia]] - someone with a name like "Ellen Willis", when you follow the links, turns out to be a Jew.

Every. Single. Time.

The reason for this is that Jewish men tend to fuck very badly and roughly, and the reason for that is that they are [[circumcision|circumcised]]. Circumcision desensitises the penis - that's mostly the point of it. So Jewish men just pound at the pussy, but it's never quite good enough, so they pound harder. And that still doesn't work, so they start [[pedophile|fucking very young women]] and turning to other [[pervert|paraphillias]].

It really is that simple. Radical, third wave feminism is *primarily* Jewish women writing about how vile and beastly Jewish men are in bed, and how they tend to rape their underage nieces. Put "Jewish" in front of the word "men" in any feminist screed, and it all becomes clear.

==The Ultimate Goal Of Feminism==

<center>[[File:What feminists want.jpg|400px]]</center>

==Ideological Bullshit at its purest==
[[File:Bleedanddoesntdie.jpg|right|300px|thumb|[[Dick Masterson]] was right]]
[[File:Feminator day of castration.png|thumb]]

<div style="margin-top: 0; line-height: 1.5em; text-align: left; padding-left: 1.6em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 40px; margin-right: 40px;">
Quote# 87815

All Men Should Be Castrated? - International "Castration Day"

Some Feminists have considered this as an option. It is highly controversial.

Allow me to introduce myself...

My name is Krista, otherwise known as "The [[Femitheist]]". I am a female, a feminist, and someone who believes strongly in True Equality.

Now, I will begin explaining this entry before I post the actual article... for your discussion, of course.

Women MUST and WILL have equality, and this is the ONLY way to achieve TRUE equality. The testicles of all males, which produce the majority of their testosterone, are the primary cause of their violent behavior. The testicles also attribute greatly to many of the health problems men experience later in life (such as prostate cancer and, of course, testicular cancer).

~:The Solution... International Castration Day.:~

It is my belief (which I consider factual based on my research) that all men SHOULD be castrated. Not only for their own safety, but for the safety of all innocent women and children.

And, to achieve this...

The entire world should have an international holiday known as: "Castration Day"

Males of all ages will be brought to the public squares of their cities nude, to stand together in a circle, as they await castration by a woman known as "The Castrator", who will be a woman chosen from the public much like a juror.

Girls of all ages will attend, lining the streets to cheer and applaud the males as they join the rest of civilized society.

It will be a free vacation for any working woman. And, young girls will be able to leave school to attend this glorious ceremony.

The males will then have one hour to get to know their Castrator. Their female "spouse" will also be able to choose whether or not they would like to milk the male in order to retain a sperm sample.

If the male is too young for a "spouse", their mother or closest female relative will decide.

After this, the men will be given anesthetics. They will be placed on a table, where their Castrator will then slice open their ball-sack, remove their testicles, and the excess skin, stitch them up and clean them up.

They will be given thirty minutes to rest after the procedure.

Once the males have all been castrated, they will be grouped together again for one last look before walking nude back to their homes.

The women will then return to their jobs, schools, et cetera, and rejoice in the completion of yet another successful ceremony.

Any man who tries to evade this holiday, "Castration Day", should be murdered wherever they
are found (treated as a criminal, as it will be a crime not to attend). Or, forced to attend.
Regardless of age.

Any woman who disagrees should be provided therapy in order to free her from misogynistic indoctrination.

This holiday should replace the day known currently as "Father's Day".

If this practice were adopted officially all across the world, all war, crime, and violence would end.

We would have a true Eutopia, where peace reigns, and men do only what they exist for...

Breed.

Labor.

SERVE.

Die.

Likewise, the change of their hormones would make them less aggressive, and thus less likely to rape. It would also provide them with better health throughout their life, as the testicles are a major cause of health issues in males as they age.

All will profit from this...

And, I believe this will come to be someday soon.

Thanks for your consideration!
<cite><div style="line-height: 1.5em; text-align: left; padding-left: 1.6em; margin-top: 0;">—[http://web.archive.org/web/20150216063513/http://www.fstdt.com/QuoteComment.aspx?QID=87815 Femitheist Divine, The New Era of Feminism 664 Comments (6/14/2012 3:32:39 AM)]</div></cite>
</div>

What this mentally retarded cunt doesn't know is that castration ELIMINATES the ability to breed, neither is castration a way to prevent wars because surely all wars happen because someone jizzed in their pants. Hey, but at least they would die, amirite?

==Itstory==
[[File:Jewish feminists relax at private meeting.gif|thumb|right|Jewesses let their hair down in private.]]
[[Image:male conspiracy.jpg‎|thumb|[[fat|I think you've had enough sandwiches for today]].]]
Only insane people, such as [[Faggots|Greek philosophers]], [[Aspies]], [[Cuck]]servatives, and the kike media, pretend Feminism isn't a mental illness. At least 100 years ago, women were tired of doing what their biology told them to do and stopped making sandwiches, so they retreated into the jungle, gained ugly musculature, and formed their own society, where they kidnapped males and extracted their semen before killing them and [[Cannibalism|eating their flesh for dinner]]. The first people to discover these abnormal mutants called them the '''Amazons.''' That is why there was a homosexual epidemic in Ancient Greece: any female could turn out to be an Amazon spy, abduct you in the middle of the night, and roast you alive. Luckily, when the Jews invented Christianity and Islam, the Amazons were reduced to extinction, until a bunch of profoundly retarded libfags in the Renaissance began to make philosophical bullshit such as Women's Rights, triggering the activation of the Amazon gene again, now under the new name, '''Feminism.'''

Judaism used to be Feminism's worst opponent, since they invented Christianity and Islam, and sent numerous Feminists to burn at the stake. However, the [[Jews]] saw an opportunity to profit from this disease, similar to Big Pharma, and, unlike in the past, they encouraged Feminist gene activation during and after the Renaissance. Because of Jewish meddling, the disease has evolved, ala [[Plague Inc]] into a full-borne biological weapon of mass destruction. The nation most devastated by this was [[Japan]], which after being nuked by [[Albert Einstein]], was fed continuously by the [[Jewnited States]] with feminism until the entire population was utterly castrated, resulting in both Japan's collapsing birth rate, the excessive [[suicide]] rate, and the invention of [[Anime]]. Testing of the Feminist retardation is also being conducted in members of the European Union, specifically Germany, using found experimental files from Dr. Josef Mengele.

'''FUN FACT''': Did you know that feminists in the late 19th century and early 20th century demanded a bachelors tax in order to increase marriage rates because men were shirking their duty to marry, while the proceeds of that tax would provide living standards for ‘unmarried maidens’? [http://www.avoiceformen.com/sexual-politics/m-g-t-o-w/an-attack-on-bachelors-and-their-reply/ We couldn't make this shit up].

Great minds were warning throughout the early 20th century that no good could come of giving women rights. And now this dangerous knowledge has been suppressed, written out of history books, censored from the public, in the name of 'progress' and so-called 'equality'.

 
{{cg|[[Judaism|Warnings From Herstory]]|girlgallery|center|<gallery perrow="4">
File:High society woman st james's gazette 15 feb 1905.jpg|Oh, how awful! The poor woman! Set her free!
File:Men destined to become women review of reviews apr 1905.jpg|Their ultimate goal
File:Women barbarians daily express 25 july 1909.jpg
File:Women proved inferior daily mirrror 9 oct 1909.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="4">
File:Woman the destroyer daily chronicle 14 dec 1910.jpg
File:Women unfit to vote 1912.jpg|If only we had listened...
File:Bearded suffragettes daily express 13 july 1914.jpg|5/10 for the hair prediction
File:Women sin for pleasure reynold's illus news 5 march 1922.jpg
File:Shady jazz perils sunday dispatch 8 dec 1928.jpg
File:Women's next craze the star 20 nov 1929.jpg|Have you seen our SJWs?
File:Women in ape stage daily chronicle 17 jan 1930.jpg
File:Vice girls in air raid shelters daily mirror 17 dec 1940.jpg
</gallery>|border=#ffd700
}}
 

It's safe to say that women's idiocy has long since existed on our planet, but rather than shutting the fuck up about it like men do, they decided to throw tantrums throughout history about stupid shit no one cares about. Skipping insane amounts of TL:DR feminist history filled with hypocrisy, stupidity, and penis envy, we eventually discover that all their bitching and moaning was eventually noticed by the western elites that decided to profit from their retardation.

Women are like hens. They travel in groups and always pick on someone or something, most often they bully every other [[whore|woman]] who does not spend all weekend at the mall and buy the latest consumer goods, i.e. any woman who thinks for herself rather than mindlessly following the group.

Sometimes, however, they 'rally' (standing around holding cardboard signs and shouting the dumbest shit) around a cause, which was the case when the women's suffrage movement started. Giving women the right to vote is was a very bad idea because women are hostile, short-sighted, and base their decisions on emotions, disregarding facts. But as we know, [[women]] got the right to vote anyway. Following that, the feminist organizations did not disband, but rather evolved into what is now known as feminism, which is the grunting about everything and nothing.

[[File:Disease of intellect in women 1904.jpg|center|600px]]

==What Feminists Do==
 

{{quote|Stupid bitches, butthurt about being a 40 year old virgin.|Alexandra Koulikov a.k.a. A dumb bitch.}}

[[Image:WomenAreStupidThrowStonesAtThem.jpg‎ |thumb|right|Die Cunt Die!]]
[[File:Muh sojiny.jpg|thumb|right|Knowledge is power.]]
[[Image:Fuglyfeministbrony.jpg|thumb|[[Bronies]] are known die-hard feminists.]]
[[File:Japanese Woman cuts off Chinese penis.gif|thumb|right|Feminism <s>in [[China]]</s>]]
[[File:Hugedildo324.jpg|thumb|right|Women don't need men!!]]
Feminists try to upset the natural balance of the world and, being outside the kitchen, deserve to be punished by any man who encounters them.

Feminists strive to make all women, especially the real ones, look bad by blaming men for everything that is wrong in the world. They always manage to find new and creative ways to [[tl;dr|blame men for the things that men do and blame men for the things that men don't do and blame men for the things that women do and blame men for the things that women fail to do]].

The feminist diet consists mainly of aborted fetuses and dead children. They believe that they are hiding this by spouting pro-choice messages all over the place, although they are clearly treacherous, sneaky, hypocritical liars bent on destroying men and America the World.

When feminists need to take a breather from blaming men all day, they like to talk about the million or so ways in which men are clearly inferior to women and how terrible it is that men believe themselves to be superior to women. They also write things like [[The Female Privilege Checklist]] and write [[histrionic]] LiveJournal entries on the dialectical nature of the female orgasm.

Feminists claim to be for equality, '''but in practice lobby for special governmental support and privileges for women only''', especially after feminism was hijacked by radical feminists, aka feminazis. Their only real concern is girls and women, because they very rarely show support for men's rights unless they benefit from it.

Consider {{ljcomm|user=feminist}}'s motto: "Comforting the afflicted, afflicting the comfortable." Doesn't this speak to a well-put-together group of people? Doesn't it sound like the kind of assholes who come up to you in a cafe and ask you weird questions about things you don't want to think about, then take your dumbfounded silence to mean your paradigm has been thoroughly rocked? Whereupon, they go to some basement and [[masturbate]] to niggers while eating cheesecake.

Oh yes, don't forget, women don't have to sign up for the draft and die for their country like men are forced to do. That wouldn't be fair and equal to them. Physically intensive, hazardous work is also avoided by women in favor of clean and safe office jobs. This means men have to pick up the slack or civilization will crumble.

Feminists sprout lies and half-truths to further their radical agenda to feminize society, such as the wage gap myth and the myth that [[domestic violence]] is [http://www.thehotline.org/2014/07/men-can-be-victims-of-abuse-too/|only initiated by males]. They fund their harmful activities with bogus feminist studies to receive more taxpayer money. They fancy double-standards such as [[Hypocrisy|demanding respect from men, while not showing similar respect in return]], and fighting for female-only government services while opposing the same type of services for men.

{{quote|Feminism encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become [[lesbian]]s.|Pat Robertson, US Politician, 1992}}

==Feminazis Run Media==
In case you haven't noticed, the Kikes who write TV preach mangina and feminazi agendas through their piss-poor writing.

Examples of this are:

[[Steven Universe|Steven Motherfucking Universe]] - A show created by a feminist for feminists that features lesbians from space who fight other lesbians that want to destroy earth. Making fanart of this show will cause many [[lulz]].

*Shitcoms -[[Unfunny]] Jewfag shows about slobs of husbands.

*Commercials - Wimmins are always right/righteous people, while men are idiots and are deserving of being physically abused.

*Talk shows/The News - Cunts get away with spewing a lot of sexist shit, while if a man does so, he is booed off the stage.

*Music - Women sing about killing their husbands over smacking them and portray that as if that's moral, yet no one gets offended. Of course, if Robin Thicke makes a sexually explicit music video, he's the bad guy. So. Fucking. Equal.

*Film - About the same as the first bullet, but in-case that doesn't drive the point home, there's an entire movie about [[Vagina dentata]].

===Regular Practices===
<center>
<gallery>

Image:Kicked.gif|If he volunteered for this shit I'd kick him too.
Image:Looking for these by Razorwitch.jpg|For the lulz
Image:Girl punches cock.gif|<s>Wackamole! Note her concentration or arousal.</s> [[I came]].
Image:Feminist_Olympics.jpg|Popular feminist sport
File:Thislookslikeajobforfeminism.jpg|I'm Super, thanks for asking...
</gallery>
Dont' feel too bad - [[BDSM|they're probably enjoying it]].
</center>

==What Feminists Think==
[[Image:Feminism1.jpg|thumb|center|The Feminist's logo.]]
[[File:IDontNeedFemenismBCMyBigBrother.JPG|thumb|The "Tsundere Sister" is how [[weeaboos]] try to fantasize Feminism as.]]
 
[[File:Glass_of_water.jpg|thumb|Feminists think everything is out to rape them.]]
Feminists have attempted to establish that [[Bullshit|women do not want money for sex]]. This is a goal that cannot be achieved, being akin to disproving the existence of gravity. People are inevitably controlled by capitalism and consumerism, which are driven in part by libidinal energies. [[Sex]] sells, and there's not a goddamn thing anyone can do about it.

Feminists claim that men are afraid of "powerful" women and that women should be afraid of men because men pull all the strings in society. They claim that marriage is oppressive and harmful to women ([[irony|while simultaneously demanding faggot marriage]]), because it represents a man's legal ownership of a woman. Only [[dyke]] relationships will do. [[Faggots]] are also welcome to copulate because they will never bear fruit. Feminists believe that same-sex reproduction is the future.

Feminists are outraged that women's voices are suppressed in this all-male world. They try to deal with their rage by screeching loud enough to drown out the voices of normal, [[batshit insane|non-batshit]] women, a la holocaust jews who go on to perpetrate their own holocaust through [[Israel]]. That is why they yell at men and break wine glasses. They say that women are not being respected as equal adults by men, who are a bunch of whining babies anyway.

[[hypocrisy|They will argue against men in female institutions and then demand membership in male institutions]]. They will have a conniption fit whenever men divorce their witches and celebrate whenever wives divorce their good-for-nothing bums. In summary, one thing that feminists love is equality. Oh that equality.

In 2001, a poll was taken at a World Organization of Women convention asking how many women approved of [[women's suffrage]]. Sixty-seven percent responded that it was the biggest negative influence on American women. Indeed, most American women realize that vaginal mutilating mudslimes are actually far more enlightened.

Feminists in 2004 are people who would rather eat carpet than clean it.

<s> Never</s> Always tell a feminist [[Tits or GTFO]].

===Feminist Logic===

[[File:Feminazi s aren t very bright 540.jpg|thumb|Equality according to femanism]]
[[File:51d26663afa96f03b5000007.png|thumb|Feminist logo explained]]
<center>'''Myth:'''</center>

{{squote|Even 30 years after the most recent women’s movement, women still make approximately 2/3 (this number shifts around, depending on the 'research') of the money men do for the same job.|[http://www.allaboutcounseling.com/women_issues.htm#women10 Oft]-[http://www.pay-equity.org/info-time.html quoted] [http://money.cnn.com/2007/04/23/news/economy/gender_gap/index.htm feminist] [http://archive.fo/UBiLD claim]}}

<center>'''Truth #1:'''</center>

{{squote|June O'Neill, former director of the Congressional Budget Office, found that among people ages 27 to 33 who have never had a child, women's earnings approach 98 percent of men's.|[http://archive.fo/3wnJl The] [http://archive.fo/8TMXB facts] [https://web.archive.org/web/20040818083344/http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m0HSP/is_1_4/ai_66678566/ they] [http://sanantonio.bizjournals.com/sanantonio/stories/1999/05/03/editorial2.html overlook]}}

<center>'''Truth #2:'''</center>

{{squote|Dr Nick Drydakis conducted a 2014 worldwide study of sexuality-pay relations and found that lesbians earned 8 per cent more than straight women in the UK and 20 per cent more than straight women in the US.|[http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/jobs/11300056/Gay-men-earn-less-than-straight-men-but-lesbians-are-paid-more.html So what was that you were saying about hetero women having to sleep their way to the top and being kept poor by The Patriarchy?]}}

<center>'''Myth:'''</center>

{{squote|95% of all victims of domestic violence are women.|[http://archive.fo/7rSKJ Another] [http://archive.fo/oY35V common] [http://weknowwhatsup.blogspot.com/2009/08/95-of-all-victims-of-domestic-violence.html feminist] [http://archive.fo/RKnxm claim]}}

<center>'''Truth:'''</center>

{{squote|Regarding perpetration of violence, more women than men (25 percent versus 11 percent) were responsible. In fact, 71 percent of the instigators in nonreciprocal partner violence were women.|[http://archive.fo/MnNg Men] [http://archive.fo/Qe5YK love] [http://www.cosc.ie/en/COSC/Abuse%20Report%20NCC.pdf/Files/Abuse%20Report%20NCC.pdf dating] [http://www.cosc.ie/en/COSC/Abuse%20Report%20NCC.pdf/Files/Abuse%20Report%20NCC.pdf sadists]}}

{|style="margin: auto;"
|<youtube>hUuKHiWKAZY</youtube>
|}

{{achtung|'''FEMINISM IS MASS [[Government|JEWISH]] CONTROL!!!}}

<center>{{frame|{{fv|jsb613vids|background-color: pink;|font-weight: soft;
|<youtube>NN05DHO9bJw</youtube>
|<youtube>IGarmqCQfXw</youtube>
|<youtube>X0lpWYpC6-g</youtube>}}}}</center>

{{squote|Take a close look at the faces of these Jewish creatures. Absolutely repulsive and sickening to gaze at, the extreme antithesis of beauty and femininity. Think of the type of work that these creatures did, and how they helped to wreck families and corrupt ordinary women in western societies. These ugly creatures are the descendants of a people known as Khazars, that originated around the Black Sea. If I had lived back then, without the laws of today to stop me, I would have burned them alive.|Skorzeny777}}

==Feminism And The Modern Woman==
'''. . . .because women should be "strong", "assertive", and "liberated". . . .'''
[[Image:Lacanphallus.JPG|thumb|What feminists are so upset over]]
[[Image:Bbeavercanhasphallus.JPG|thumb|left|the goal of feminism]]
[[File:Why dont ya cut ur penis boi.png|thumb|left|]]
[[Image:Femalelazer.jpg|thumb|Oh god, why...]]
[[File:Feminism_male_perspective.JPG|thumb|Feminism from the male perspective.]]
This is of course everything women ARE NOT, also lacking in logic, cognition, and critical thinking skills, "feminism" was actually an evil computer program whose sole purpose was to create an [[irl]] botnet army under the control of some nigress whore of a bulldyke. When the order to march against the unsuspecting male population was given [[at least 100 years ago]] the fembots experienced a temporary overload due to the unrecognized software (read: man thinking) and their CPU's were forced to do a full reset, sadly only half the files on their hard-drives were backed up creating fembots with absolutely zero logic, problem solving skills, or any true independent thought at all yet still maintaining their entitlement to be treated with equality.
These fembots later bred with (see: [[rape]]) the manfolk and generation after generation later we come to the Modern Woman who still retains segments of the Fembot program deep within her DNA as well as the latent logical inconsistencies which frequently lead her to 404 irl and become obsessed with any shiny object she might happen to set eyes upon, pn the condition it drained the money out of a mans wallet

[[Truth|Scientists believe that at least 98% of modern women suffer from latent fembot contamination]]

{{quote|I went on a sex strike for five years after our kid was born, as a way to maintain my autonomy and agency once I realised the kid thing really did economically trap me into my (reasonably happy) marriage with a (reasonably egalitarian, yet clueless) guy. I just couldn’t give up that last thing of myself – if I had, then he would have owned all of me, not just my free childkeeping and house labour. (And I didn’t miss it. Caring for kid, going to [[school]], making art took up all of my lenergy.)

When I did want to have sex again, I made the political decision to [engage with men outside of the marriage, as well as the husband. If I was going to engage in (the oppressive act of) sex, then I would have it how I wanted it and with whomever I wanted it with, so as to expand the boundaries inherent in the system of non-consent.|[http://blog.iblamethepatriarchy.com/2011/07/18/a-bit-of-lighthearted-fun/#comment-180274 Anon femcunt]|CUT CHEATING HUSBANDS COCK OFF! FUCK RANDOM GUYS!}}

==Quotes==
Taken from "The S.C.U.M. Manifesto"
by Valerie Solanas http://gos.sbc.edu/s/solanas.html :
<center>
{{morphquote|feminaziquotes|background-color: #FFCCCC;|font-weight: bold;
|The male is completely egocentric, trapped inside himself, incapable of empathizing or identifying with others, or love, friendship, affection of tenderness. He is a completely isolated unit, incapable of rapport with anyone.|Feminsts however are wonderful, charming people who never complain and are always smiling.

|His responses are entirely visceral, not cerebral; his intelligence is a mere tool in the services of his drives and needs; he is incapable of mental passion, mental interaction; he can't relate to anything other than his own physical sensations. He is a half-dead, unresponsive lump, incapable of giving or receiving pleasure or happiness; consequently, he is at best an utter bore, an inoffensive blob, since only those capable of absorption in others can be charming. He is trapped in a twilight zone halfway between humans and apes, and is far worse off than the apes because, unlike the apes, he is capable of a large array of negative feelings -- hate, jealousy, contempt, disgust, guilt, shame, doubt -- and moreover, he is aware of what he is and what he isn't.|"I agree, I suck, now shut your whore mouth and leave!"

|Being an incomplete female, the male spends his life attempting to complete himself, to become female.|[[Transexual]].

|Women, in other words, don't have penis envy; men have pussy envy.|I get the feeling nobody wants HER pussy.

|The effect of fathers, in sum, has been to corrode the world with maleness. The male has a negative Midas Touch -- everything he touches turns to shit.|Interestingly some women have this magic ability too.

|Sex is not part of a relationship: on the contrary, it is a solitary experience, non-creative, a gross waste of time. The female can easily -- far more easily than she may think -- condition away her sex drive, leaving her completely cool and cerebral and free to pursue truly worthy relationships and activities; but the male, who seems to dig women sexually and who seeks out constantly to arouse them, stimulates the highly sexed female to frenzies of lust, throwing her into a sex bag from which few women ever escape.|Further proving that women hate sex.

|To call a man an animal is to flatter him; he's a machine, a walking dildo. It's often said that men use women. Use them for what? Surely not pleasure.|Not YOUR pleasure... and I [[bitch|wonder why]]...}}
</center>

==Feminism and Hypocrisy==
[[File:Barbie-he-man-double-standard.jpeg|thumb|Funnily Barbie was invented by some faggot guy -BURN HIM!- wait.. that's homosexual oppression D: our dukeginas are confused...]]
[[File:Patriarchy fashion.png|thumb|right|Score 1 for feminism!]]
Part of being a feminist is being able to make justifications and excuses, so that even the most disgusting acts seem justified for them. Examples:
*The best way to be an empowered adult woman is to play up your victimhood.
*Men and women are equal and to prove this they support laws that give preferential treatment to women based on their possession of a vagina (divorce proceedings, child custody battles, employment, college enrollment, criminal cases, to name a few)
*Support of Muslims, despite [[Islam]] being one of the most legit misogynistic societies in the world.
*When a statistic points out that there are more men than women in a workfield, they will quickly jump and scream sexism. However, if a statistic points that there are more women than men in a workfield, they will consider it a 'triumph of women's rights'.
*Point out that a women uses her goods to attract audience/[[Zoe Quinn|advance in her career]] and feminists will be the first to scream "slut shaming". However, when other women sell their bodies ie Boothbabes, Porn, they will be the first to scream "cover it up".
*Feminists will claim men will only make decisions that benefit other men, and that's patriarchy. However, when a woman is elected to make decisions that only benefit women, that's progress and feminist.
*They claim that any woman should be able to make her own decisions. When a woman doesn't make a decision that suits their agenda, they will claim "internalized misogyny".
*Feminists will retardedly bitch when guys ogle over a woman's tits and ass and call it patriarchy, but it's okay for women to ogle over a male's pecs and ass and call it 'female empowerment'.
*They will complain that men aren't [[Incel|entitled to]] relationships with women yet they ask "where have all the good men gone?" and feel their career and/or degree entitles them to a top-tier six figure-earning husband (after they've rode the [[slut|cock carousel]] a few dozen times).
*They fight to [[bitch|raise awareness]] of [[Clit|Female Genital Mutilation]] but are A-OK with Circumcision.
**They [[Rick and Morty|fucking love science]] but will say Circumcision isn't as bad as FGM because it's a [[Jew|religious practice]] that doesn't hurt anybody.
***[[Abortion|MY BODY! MY CHOICE!]]
*A feminist will convince herself that men are [[Kikes|raping sadistic sexual predators]] and women are [[asexual]] innocent creatures who can't fathom sex let alone give consent.
*A feminist will convince herself that decisions that benefit women also magically benefit men, therefore more decisions that benefit women must be made.
*A feminist will convince herself that [[Fetal Alcohol Syndrome]] doesn't exist, therefore no remorse should be had for drinking during pregnancy.
*A feminist will convince herself that sexism can only apply to women because they are oppressed, therefore any discrimination based on gender towards males is not sexism and is not as bad.
*A feminist will delude herself into believing that every mistake or mishap is planed by males, therefore every consequence is due to the fact that men discriminate her.
*A feminist will convince herself that rape can only happen when a vagina is penetrated by a penis, therefore she can do whatever she want to the male she has enslaved in her basement.
*A feminist will convince herself that men rape and devalue women and the way to fight this is to have as many one-night stands and meaningless relationships as possible.
*A feminist is convinced that any sexual advance by men is meant to intimidate her, therefore rage tantrums are a justified reaction.
*A feminist will say it's okay for a [[Italy|grown woman]] to groom and fuck an [[shotacat|underage boy]] but not vice versa. Press them on this and you'll get them to admit to some hilariously, yet not untrue, misogynistic things like teen boys are mature enough to handle a relationship with an adult woman while teen girls are as dumb as children and need protection from grown men.
*The white male patriarchy is bad. Marx, Derrida, Foucault, Heidegger, Marcuse, and Baudrillard said so!

==Feminazis And Other Variations==

[[Image:Feminazi2.jpg|thumb|right|Not all feminazis look or dress like bull dykes, but are just as nasty.]]

[[Image:tumblr_thefremen.jpg|thumb|right|Some feminists are actually 'men'.]]

Not be confused with real [[Nazi|Nazis]] who were deeply patriarchal and would have thrown feminist cunts into the oven along with the faggots and kikes.

Feminazis like to shave their heads and never shave the rest of their body, because they respect the work of the [[Goddess]]. They wear wife-beaters and combat boots and celebrate how beautiful life is when you realize the wonders of dyke love.
It is well-known scientific fact that all feminazis are fucking lemons.

Many feminazis become [[vegan]] [[hippies]], cook and eat lots of [[cake]], smoke pot, smell wonderfully hormonally full and sing crudely misandrist folk songs at your local [[open mic]].

Most feminists don't like being called feminazis, often giving the argument that they're "not invading Poland." Because, you know, [[bullshit|Nazis haven't existed since World War II ended.]]

[[Feminism]] is one of the leading causes of degeneracy on the [[Internet]] today.

Feminism has also been known to be used by women in conjunction with chivalry.

Feminism can cause lymphoma in men. Just ask David [[Bale]], father of [[Batman]]. Or better yet, don't, [[lol]].

Recently, a new breed of these peculiar creatures has been discovered. These are called "Pseudo Feminazis". They will gladly give you some action if you give them the D. But beware! It's advisable that you acquaint the bitch with your bff roofie first, so she can't scream "RAEP" afterwards. Get some of your buddies to do her with if you want to (not that you have any, you basement dwelling retard).

<center>'''Typical fuck-buckets'''</center>
<center><youtube>zs3I6ISQpZU</youtube></center>

==Feminist LiveJournal Communities==
[[Image:Feminism.jpg|thumb|120px|Feminist literature.]]
Populated entirely by twatarded lesbians and emasculated self-hating men who can't get laid by conventional means, feminist communities on LiveJournal share many qualities, the most notable of which is a group tolerance of dissent previously only demonstrated by Orwell's Ingsoc.

Most of them are self-described "safe spaces for women," which in practice means anything men say is devalued, patronizing, and an attack on their ideological comfort. If you dare broach how patriarchy also hurts men, expect a ten page flame war and personal death threats.

Every member of a feminist community claims to have been raped, molested, or at the very least [[almost raped]]. Why? Sisterhood is all about sharing personal experiences, and if some evil man hasn't forcibly ravaged your cunt, what have you to share? Stories about the mythical "glass ceiling?" No, that was fucking 1970, and the bar has been raised.

As much as feminists would love to prevent [[rape]], they love preventing the prevention of rape even more. Any suggestion that females should have a hand in the prevention of rape is labeled as victim blaming. Thus, when those Riot-grrl bitches paraded around in torn up miniskirts, skimpy tanktops, smudged lipstick, and had a 40 of Olde Englishe in hand, they weren't asking to get some surprise sex. Right...

It is best for men to go to these [[communities]] and stir up some [[lulz]] by means of [http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sea/274495936.html amusing stories such as this.]

==Freebleeding==
[[Image:Freebleeding_00.jpg|right|thumb|That'll teach the patriarchy!]]
[[File:Pussy dreadlocks.jpg|thumb|There's a reason they're called '''dread'''locks]]
Because tampons are a sign of the patriarchy, so wimmin should be able to spread their disgusting vaginajuice-induced blood all over. They should also be able to breastfeed and shit in public. It should be noted that Freebleeding carries all kinds of risks, including [[HNNNNG|septicaemia]] and toxic shock syndrome. The constant flow of blood over the skin is also a major irritant, and no one (in their right mind) would want to walk around with swollen, blood spattered legs.

To really appreciate just how immensely stupid this entire abortion of a concept is, the [[MRA]] equivalent would basically be #Freeboner which would entail encouraging young men to pop a chubby whenever and wherever as its a "natural" process that one should not be ashamed of or be forced to try and hide. Feminists in turn would of course instantly start screeching "almost raped" while running for the nearest hugbox to have a good cry and ensuing circle-shlick with all the other free bleeding moon sisters.

Feminists in the UK have recently taken to freebleeding as [http://www.people.com/article/women-protest-free-bleeding-tampon-tax-uk a protest on tampon taxes], with some of them complaining that the UK does not tax razors, an implement [[no|used exclusively by men]]. It is safe to assume that these women have hairy legs, double dong dildos, sensible shoes, and menstrual dreadlocks.

 
{{cg|Ewww|retch|center|<gallery perrow="5">
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==Feminists Are Inherently Violent==
If there's two things feminists always tend to lack it's sensibility and restraint. It could even be argued that feminism is nothing more than just a convenient way for women to legally [[chimp out]] with senseless vaginal invested violence. In one recent occurrence a group of half naked bull dykes openly assaulted a group of unarmed, archbishops and had to be forcibly restrained before they were able to reach the point of digging on into their ass cracks for crap to catapult at the closeted Christian clerics.

<center>
{{frame|{{center|{{Photoframe|wuhoo|border: 2px solid pink; padding: 5px; background-color: pink;|font-weight: bold;
|[[File:Feminism_-_Archbishop_Attack_-_01.jpg]]{{center|{{colortext|black|}}}}
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</center> 

Feminazi steals baby Jesus.

<youtube>IcHPUtpo5Fc</youtube> 

Feminazi attacks [[Putin]] and [[Angela Merkel]].

<youtube>ERSGZO2GKHo</youtube> 

==Contributions and Changes made by Feminists to this World==
[[File:tumbleweed.gif|center]]

==The Future Of Feminism==
[[File:Aldrovandi freak.jpg|thumb|right|150px|A typical bra-burner]]
One of the main reasons that we will [[nevar|never]] be able to have the [[Democrats|Democratic Party]] in power is because <s>[[liberalism]]</s> mental disorder is often tied to feminism, [[faggotry]], and countering intolerance with even more intolerance. If, however, conspiracy theorists manage to [[IRL troll]] enough people into hating the [[Republican]] [[government]], then there will be nothing to counter [[Hillary Clinton]] from going into power. (Assuming the [[Obama|/b/lackup]] doesn't [[rape]] her, <STRIKE>which is highly unlikely at this point.</STRIKE> LOL HE DID IT) Why Hillary? Because [[feminazism|feminazis]] all over the country will have nothing better to do than swamp the voting booths unless their husbands weren't pussy whipped enough to cunt punt them back in the kitchen and bedroom.

Since Hillary is renowned for chopping off her husband's dick and sewing it onto herself, she'll want to spread the principle nationwide and waste all of her salary on funding a scientific project to build an army of Black hermaphroditic dykes in an attempt to make men obsolete, thus fulfilling Solanis's dream. Since most women are dumb enough to follow Hillary because she's the only female candidate running, they'll soon form militias to hunt down men for sport and make room for this new breed of hermaphrodites to spread their disease. [[Japan]] would hopefully intervene by dropping a bunch of bombs wrapped in used school-girl panties all across North America. If you don't want Feminism in the future, rape all women NOW! Except ugly cunts like Oprah with the Minge From Hell and Susan Boyle, who will make your penis disintergrate.
{{clear}}

==[[gb2kitchen|Dealing]] With Feminists (aka How to build Immunity)==
[[File:Cure4feminism.gif|thumb|right|[[Rape|The only known cure for feminism.]]]]
[[Image:Hilarysign.jpg|thumb|right|Stopping the spread of female empowerment at its source]]
[[Image:Lizbound.jpg|thumb|right|The secret desire of most feminists]]
[[File:Patriarchy.png|thumb|Feminists cannot resist being butthurt at the sight of this simple image.]]
[[File:I-don-amp-039-t-care-if-you-are-pans-xual-or-pots-xual-you-are-a-feminazi c 4270615.jpg|thumb]]

In recent times another natural enemy of the feminists emerged in the form of the [[Video Games]] Industry and [[gamer]]s in general, as the epic troll world war about game journalism known as [[Gamergate]] could testify. The aftermath of Gamergate led to the rise of mentally damaged [[retard]]s such as [[Anita Sarkeesian]] who shout "MUH OBJECTIFCATION!!!" whenever Blizzard or Valve releases even a single game depicting supermodels, tits, ass and bikinis, forgetting that we've moved away from the age of Mario. Video games today, far from objectifying women, will always depict women as smart super-athletic badasses who kill a hundred million MEN and will crush the testicles of the inevitably male supervillains, proving that videogames are feminist. If you ever meet a post-Gamergate feminist such as Sarkeesian, kindly remind them that Samus from Metroid, or Lara Croft, make better feminist symbols, and that the third-wavers such as [[Trigglypuff]] are just using objectification as an excuse to be ugly, physically unfit and have severely acidic B.O.

When dealing with a [[feminist]], take careful consideration not to catch their faggotry. Some precautions may include staying away from [[women rights|lesbian]] gatherings and not going to [[12chan]]. If you come into contact with [[emo|one of them]], go home and be [[an hero]] before you spread it to others. The only reason to even look at one is for the purpose of lulz generating. A real shame, because so many college lesbians are really hot, especially those femme genderfuck women. The best way of verbally dealing with a feminazi is to tell her to "shut the fuck up, and pop the kettle on love, 2 sugars thanks". Also, the mention of [[Dick Masterson]] will cause any feminist to [[shit brix|shit a brick]] while masturbating to his sweetass Aviators.
Or you could just find the hole in their logic as seen here:

===Feminazi Gets It===

{|style="margin: auto;"
|<youtube>3lXUd7VxuSA</youtube>
|}
<center>'''Bitch was [[asking for it]].'''</center> 
{{quote|I love the so called [[Retard|intelligent smart women]] getting trashed by the actual smart intelligent man, so many weak men cant even operate there brain, A smart man can expose this rotting filth [[trap]] for what she is, a horribly hurt person that doesnt even remember where she was when she started, if it wasnt for modern life we would throw a [[whore]] like this in a ditch and set her on KILL IT WITH [[FIRE]].|thisgame2}}

 

=== Marc Lepine ===
[[Marc Lepine]] was a 25 year old French Canadian who, in the course of going for [[high score|''le score élevé'']], killed 14 women, wounded 10 women, and <s>wounded 4 men </s> accidentally wounded 4 ''people'' during a feminist extermination at the Universite de Montreal on December 6, 1989. Not able to live with the mistake of nearly destroying 4 innocent men's lives, he tragically ended his own life shortly afterwards. His great deeds will never be forgotten. RIP Marc; even your [[French]] heritage can be forgiven for your contribution to society.

{{squote|Being rather backwards-looking by nature (except for science), the feminists have always enraged me. They want to keep the advantages of women (e.g. cheaper insurance, extended maternity leave preceded by a preventative leave, etc.) while seizing for themselves those of men <nowiki>[. . .]</nowiki> They are so opportunistic they do not neglect to profit from the knowledge accumulated by men through the ages. They always try to misrepresent them every time they can. Thus, the other day, I heard they were honoring the Canadian men and women who fought at the frontline during the world wars. How can you explain that, since women were not authorized to go to the frontline? Will we hear of Caesar's female legions and female galley slaves who of course took up 50% of the ranks of history, though they never existed. A real Casus Belli.|Marc Fromage's pre-suicide scrawlings}}

===Trolling Feminists===

[[File:So+that+comic+has+been+touched+by+a+feminazi.jpg|thumb|Simply show this pic to a fellow feminazi, her tits will sure be angry]]

Because of their [[Mental retardation|severely damaged brains]], Feminists are incredibly easy to troll. It does not take a great deal of imagination or intelligence to troll a Feminazi (which is good, considering that [[you]] have neither of those qualities, but that is beside the point right now.) If you can't have access to a Muslim or a Gamer to exterminate the profoundly retarded cunts, then here are a few ideas to get you to build up your immunity on your own:

* They get raped because they asked for it, as simple as that!

* Neurobiology is always the best way to refute any feminist fantasies of equality. Diregard all their opinions and defend yourself by the fact that men and women are inherently biologically ''different'' and therefore any perspective of similarity is a delusion.

* Tell them that you are using feminism as an excuse for being infertile or too aggressive and stinky for society's tastes.

*Tell her "Quit yer bitchin' get in the [[kitchen]] and make me a [[sammich]]!"

*Remind her that women have never invented or achieved anything of importance, ever.

*Accuse them of "creep shaming" you.

*[[Crapflood]] pictures of bondage porn or any kind of porn that doesn't involve [[BDSM|pussy worship]]

*Tell her that [[truth|men always were and always will be the superior gender]].

*Politely explain to her that most men wouldn't talk to women if they didn't have vaginas.

*When on a man-bashing tirade, remind them that "not all men are bad"

*And that women would be fucked (or rather, ''not fucked'') if men didn't think with their dicks. Look at how men [[war|treat each other]].

*Tell her that you voted for black person or anyone else who opposed Hillary

*"You destroyed Sweden and Japan."

*Example of a typical feminism troll: [http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090104040529AAtaItO] [http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090104040635AAYD9]

*Go to the [[Feminist]] Message board by clicking [http://messages.yahoo.com/Cultures_%26_Community/Groups/Women/forumview?bn=18943567 here] and type in shit like "No one cares about a woman's rights, now shut the fuck up and go make me a sammich."

*<s>Show them {{ytlink|c68ZFHglYLc|this video}}.</s> BALEETED

*Tell them how [[truth|minorities are privileged]], WAKE THE FUCK UP!

*Walk into one of their retarded cult meetings and shout: "Which one of you fine honeybunnies would come back to my place, cook me a nice meal, and [[suck my dick]]?"

*Mention Esthar Villar, quoting the shit out of her book "The Manipulated Male." So lulz-worthy when she wrote it back in the day, she received so many death threats she had to skip town.

*Ask them if you should lock your doors. If they say "yes", accuse them of victim blaming and say "we should just teach [[niggers]] not to steal!"

*Tell them to "man up"

*Equate all feminists with [[Femen]], especially when talking to radical feminists.

*Remind them that [[Pathetic|Elliot Rodger]] killed twice as many men as women, and wanted to kill off the entire male population.

*Tell them that they are amazing visionaries and that you wish that their parents would have believed in abortion as much as they do

==Feminists Are Allergic To Reality==

[[File:Okcupid_feminist_lol.png|300px|thumb|right]]

<center>{{fv|starvids|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;|
<youtube>x64cy3Bcr98</youtube>|<youtube>vLqHv0xgOlc</youtube>
}}</center>

===R.A.P.E. (Revolt Against Penis Envy) Contributing Toward an Understanding of Male/Female Harmony by Boyd Rice===

<center>
{{morphquote|feminaziquotes2|background-color: pink;|font-weight: bold;
|In man an, two kinds of history are fighting for power. In the masculine being, there is a certain contradiction; he is this man, yet he is something else besides, which woman neither understands nor admits, which she feels as robbery and violence upon that which to her is holiest. This secret and fundamental war of the sexes has gone on ever since there were sexes, and will continue-silent, bitter, unforgiving, pitiless…|'''Oswald, ''The Decline of the West''

|In the sixties, talk of a “war between the sexes” was very popular. In point of fact, what was being described was not a war at all, merely the recognition of a change in the balance that had previously existed between the two sexes. The grip of man’s domination was loosening, and women rushed forward to take advantage of the situation. The natural relationship which had hitherto existed between man and woman was put under increasing strain by the shift in balance and was rapidly evolving into an ever-more-adversarial coalition.

But war?

War is the variety of violence which one traditionally resorts to when all other means of asserting his dominance have been exhausted. There was no war between the sexes in the sixties simply because man had long since ceased to assert his dominance by any means. It is precisely this male backsliding which gave rise to the tension which was misconstrued as war, and which has grown steadily worse until today. Perhaps a war will be necessary to bridge the abyss across which the sexes stare mistrustingly at each other.|'''Harry P. Ness'''

|Woman is a temple… built over a sewer.|'''[[Christfag|Tertullian]]'''}}
</center>

spoiler alert, Hitler sis everything to stop feminism but you had to spoil it all, you anglo scum.

===[-+] [[RAPE]]===
<div id="mw-customcollapsible-tldr" class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed">
At one time, all was right with the world. It was lorded over by men who imposed their will by force. Women kept their mouths shut, underlings knew their place, and those who opposed the prevailing order had their heads cut off. So far, so good. In this bygone Golden Age, sadistic values determined the quality of life. Sadistic values are exclusively male values, values predicated not upon baseless intellectual abstractions or wishful thinking, but upon hard biological truths.

One such truth involves testosterone, the hormone responsible for shaping the male character. It lies at the root of man’s aggression and domination and has consequently played the key role in shaping mankind’s history.

And the history of mankind is, quite simply, the history of man. It is the story of his creativity and his daring. It is the story of his strength, his courage, and his invention. Every great idea, great empire, or great undertaking has been the byproduct of man and man alone. History’s great epochs are those in which male domination and male force reigned supreme.

Just as testosterone ordained man’s preeminent role as creator and master of world history, woman’s position was likewise decided by her hormonal predisposition. Estrogen lies at the center of the feminine character, and it is this hormone, says science, that is responsible for woman’s overabundance of emotion and apparent lack of logic. This primary biological difference is the basis of what is commonly referred to as sexual differentiation.

Woman is quick to embrace the concept of sexual/hormonal differentiation when she can use it to her advantage – to explain, for instance, why men are such brutes. But when the same criteria are applied to explain her own shortcomings, she dismisses it as a cruel construct invented by man to discredit her. She is far more comfortable with feelings than with facts. Facts, in her opinion, are made by man in the image of man, to be used against her, to keep her down. When confronted by the cold reality of facts, woman’s emotions fly into a tizzy, and her emotions have no origin in the intellect, or in instinct, or in any sort of observation or deductive reasoning. They are instead a primordial amalgam of overblown hopes and fears, childish fantasies carried to absurd extremes.

As reactions to external realities, her emotions make no apparent sense. Only when recognized as the byproduct of an overwhelming internal reality-that of estrogen-do her emotions and perceptions finally begin to become comprehensible.

In a once – glorious past, woman was a creature without rights, a second – class citizen. In some places, she wasn’t considered a citizen at all – she was property. She was part cook, part whore, part servant, and all child. So what has changed to put woman on an equal footing with man, deserving of the same rights and privileges? Has woman herself changed? Decidedly not. Not in temperament, character, or ability. She is the same creature she has always been, with the sad addition of some rather unflattering conceits.

It is not woman’s advancement in the realm of character which has facilitated her upward mobility – rather, it is man’s loss of character. She has gained ground only because he has lost ground. And why has he lost ground? Because the white male has been bamboozled. He has been shamed into submission and made to feel guilty about his aggression and his will-to-power. But are not aggression and the will-to-power part and parcel of his character, stamped upon his soul by nature itself? Are they not in fact the very things which once ordained his greatness?

Modern woman would have us believe that she has been oppressed by countless centuries of male domination. Can this be true? She would have us believe that her standing was the outcome of some arbitrary bit of whimsy, concocted spitefully by man and imposed maliciously (unfairly!) upon woman.

Was woman forcibly held back by the superior strength and intellect of man, or was she simply in an “inferior” position due to some lack of those qualities within herself? Was it man who chose a second class existence for woman, or was it, in fact, nature? Man sought only to act in accordance with the reality dictated by nature’s wisdom.

Woman, in her bitterness, blamed man for the position in which she found herself. This was surely his doing. He had cruelly cheated her out of all that was rightfully hers. The cad! Allowing her emotions to run wild (as usual), woman blamed man for all the world’s ills, attacking male values at every opportunity. Ironically, it was the collapse and disappearance of male values which permitted woman’s rise to begin with. The “domination” which she so fervently attacked had, for all intents and purposes, long since vanished from public life. The positive, aggressive male values behind every step of upward evolution have been superseded by a soft and passive female ethic.

What can be done to subdue the sickly sway of feminine values? How can we silence the interminable whining of feminism’s sob sisters? In a nutshell: Woman must be put back in her place. Man’s great error was to put woman on a pedestal, when she is far more at ease on her knees - where she belongs. The only way to subdue feminine values is by subduing the female herself. Woman must be reacquainted with truth and force. She must be reacquainted with truth through force.

Since woman is above all an emotional creature, appeals to her “intellect” are worthless. She must be shown in no uncertain terms the absolute nature of the master/slave relationship endemic to the sexes. What plainer way to demonstrate this relationship than the simple act of rape? This primary act reveals beyond a reasonable doubt certain irrefutable verities: Man is taller, woman is smaller. Man is strong, woman is weak. Man is master, woman is not.

The ritual we now call marriage originated as abduction, rape, and enslavement. In those happy-go-lucky days, one’s rights were not mere abstractions based on legislation, but rather the outcome of what could be imposed by physical force alone. Force was recognized as truth in action, and the outcome of force was acknowledged as justice. Although this principle has been widely disavowed, it’s truth is as absolute now as it ever was.

And the only truth a woman is capable of understanding is that which she can feel wholly within the depths of her childlike emotions. At one time, those emotions could be swayed by the sweet notion of romance, but her envy has long since destroyed that. These days, the only way to restore balance between the sexes is by fear and pain. Fear commands respect, and pain demands understanding (read: compliance).

Rape is the act by which fear and pain are united in love. It is the triumph of harmony through oppression.

Rape teaches balance, the natural balance of man=above/woman=below. This balance is a lesson which woman must learn, and only man can teach her.

The only way to teach subjugation is through hands on oppression. And woman must learn subjugation. The only way to teach submission is through active domination. And woman must learn submission. She must be brought down to her natural kneeling position. She must be returned to the bottom, where she’s happiest. Only then may man be happy once more.

If it takes war to reinstate this happiness, then let there be war. Not a war between the sexes, but a war of the sexes, against the pernicious doctrine of sexual equality. And if the chief weapon in this war is rape, then let there be rape. Let there be triumphant male force riding roughshod over woman and her values. Let there be brutal male force instructing and enlightening woman in absolute terms. Each rape is but a battle in a war. And each battle won is but a link in a glorious chain – a chain which will one day be used to keep woman in her naturally ordained place – beneath man.

But enough of talk. The time for words is over. The time for action has come. Now is the time to rise up. Now is the time to go forth. Now is the time to educate. Now is the time to subjugate. Now is the time to dominate. Now is the time to rape. Now is the time to rape. Now is the time to rape. Let the Revolt Against Penis Envy commence. Go forth! Rise up! Rape! Rape! Rape!

Long live oppression!

Long live love!

Long live rape!
</div>

=== How feminists will cage all men ===
<div style="height:10em; overflow-y:scroll; box-shadow:0 0 10px inset; border-radius:5px; background-color:#eee; padding:1em;">
Let's take a look at how feminists can achieve caging all men through shortcut thinking and slowly shifting the meaning of the term sexual abuse.

In 1990 the definition of sexual abuse against a woman might have been something like "PHYSICAL sexual actions against her will, for example touching her genitals, breasts, kissing her and so on". Here feminists start a campaign and force everyone to state they're against sexual abuse, and indeed, most people do because indeed it's not good to physically sexually bully someone, there is little reason for anyone to disagree. Here they establish a shortcut "sexual abuse = bad", which at this stage is not harmful yet. However they slowly start changing the definition of sexual abuse.

By 2000 the new definition of sexual abuse may additionally also include VERBAL actions, such as asking a girl about her sexual life. Here we'll already starting to limit free speech but most people didn't notice the subtle change in the definition of sexual abuse, they just remember they're against sexual abuse.

By 2010 the definition of sexual abuse will also include ANY PHYSICAL action such as any touching at all -- if you touch a woman's hand against her will, you're committing sexual abuse. But most people still only remember they're against sexual abuse, whatever it means -- additionally the few people that notice and criticize the changes in definition start to be bullied for supporting sexual abuse or are told to shut up and not make big deal of a small change in definitions. The changes happen slowly so that at no point people notice a sudden jump which they could protest -- individuals may protest on occasion but one man can do nothing and there will happen no sudden change that would synchronize a mass protest.

By 2020 sexual abuse will include practically any action towards a woman which the woman dislikes in any way, such as making eye contact, talking, smiling, holding door open for her, sending her a friend request on social media sites and so on. Now men are bullied, they're scared of just meeting a woman and talking to her -- if the woman decides it's sexual abuse, it is. But if you ask anyone "Are you against sexual abuse?" of course he has to answer "yes" -- answering "no" is absurd because everyone is against sexual abuse, no matter that definition now is completely different from the original definition, it's just the power of words that can keep people approve of and support insanity.

Soon enough it will be observed that practically all men are sexual abusers because sexual abuse now means just interacting with women and basically all men want to or even just have to interact with women in some way. Now feminists may say: since gender studies proved all men are sexually dangerous, it is "logical" that we have to cage all men, it would be insane to let predators run free, right? And just like that we arrive at our dystopia.

If you think they can't do it, [https://www.tastyfish.cz/lrs/yes_they_can.html you are wrong].
</div>
<ref>[https://www.tastyfish.cz/lrs/shortcut_thinking.html LRS Wiki: shortcut_thinking] by Miloslav Číž - content available under CC0 1.0 (public domain)</ref>

==Gallery==

{{cg||cuntmad|center|<gallery perrow="6">
File:MvW.jpg|This is how [[feminist]]s see the world.
File:Cuntfire.jpg
File:Ela_Thier.jpg|Feminism = plot to give ugly bitches access to mainstream society
File:Feminism_-_How_To_Enrage_Feminazis.png|This is especially fruitful for trolling "Slut Walk" pages/sites.
File:Feminism_-_Fairness_In_The_Workplace.jpg
File:SecretFeministWeapon.jpg|[https://www.xojane.com/fun/my-secret-feminist-weapon Beware of feminist chemical weapons against men].
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="6">
File:Feminism_-_Flyer.jpg
File:Feminism Effects.jpg
File:Feminism_-_Stop_Starring_At_My_Man-Tits.jpg
File:ScreenShots.png
File:Wimminz monopoly.jpg
File:Mother vs father rights.jpg|Look at all this male privilege.
File:Feminism_-_Blames_Others.jpg
File:Feminism_-_Encourages_Women.jpg
File:Shoulditberape.jpg|There is no escaping rape culture
File:Feminism_-_Feminist_Mothers_Don't_Believe_In_Breast_Feeding.jpg
File:1st_World_Problems_&_Feminism_-_True_Victims.jpg
File:Hardcore Man Bitch.jpg|What you can expect to become if she escapes from the kitchen and gets her otherwise empty head filled with too many crazy ideas
File:Donotwantfeminist.jpg
File:Harem Inc.png|Harem Inc
File:Feminism_-_The_Real_Truth.jpg
File:Billionsofcunts.jpg
File:Feminist Army.jpg
File:Feminist Puter Comic.png
File:Feminist Pillow Talk.png
File:Sharpieinfatasspooper.jpg|Feminist sticks sharpie in pooper
File:4chor8chpolcatlady.png
File:Femvslogiccomic.png
File:300dicks.jpg|You suck 300+ dicks and you wonder why you can't find a beta provider?
File:Alimonyforexgf.jpg|Live in the west? Expect to pay alimony for having a girlfriend.
File:Arguingwithholes.jpg|Arguing with [[Vagoo|holes]].
File:Baecunt5838343.jpg|When women are allowed to drive.
File:Findmyself.png|Finding myself~
File:Muhdiversity.png|Muh diversity~
File:Allfeminists.jpg
File:Feminism Was Always Bad.png
File:121Femaleprivilege.png
File:Polvaginas.png|Pol/ vs Vagoo
File:Titsorfuckinggtfo.png|Tits or fucking GTFO
File:ERquote.jpg|Based [[Elliot Rodger|Elliot]] on womyn.
File:Fatbitch666.jpg|TOP KEK
File:Fruitoffeminism.jpg
File:Realman.png
File:40 and still not married.jpeg
File:FeminismB4A4.png
File:Beefcurtain.jpg
File:Feminist Chart.jpg
File:Feminazi Americunt Chimpout.jpg
File:Feminist door.jpg
File:Feminist Response To Draft.jpg|Feminist Response to Draft
File:Feminismdotexe.png
File:Burgerfeminism.jpg
File:Dating A Feminist.jpg
File:Liberalslollllll.jpg
File:Singlemothers12348128321.jpg
File:Origin and Development of a Feminist.jpg
File:Singlemothers2232323232.jpg
File:Femifagbitches.jpg|Women.exe
File:Uglyvshotnerd.jpg|How girls see [[You]], compared to geeky celebrities.
File:Victimresponsibilities.jpg|What will happen to you if you are a victim to any sexual assault by a woman.
File:Degenerateslut.jpg|The story of a generic degenerate whore feminazi
File:Femalelogiclol.png|Feminist "Logic"
File:Feminism8248343.jpg|Fembabbling fact #6
File:Haterape.jpg|The truth about raep
File:Malepriv623.png|Male "Privilege"
File:Redditcuckfaggots.png|Reddit cuck's story post-feminazi gf lol
File:Womanbrainlolz.jpg|Woman "Brain"
File:Nutshellfeminism.jpg|Feminism summed up
File:Feminismthenandnow33.jpg|Feminism then and now
File:Feminazibitch.jpg|Feminist bitch gets smacked back, and cries about it.
File:Publichousing844.jpg|Females vs male privilege
File:Feministwhore.jpg|Claire's cunty mannerisms.
File:Oldnavywhore.jpg|Girls even get shirt privelige too!
File:Femalepriveligepedo.jpg|Are you female? A pedophile? Don't expect any punishment! [[Allison Rapp]] is a prime example.
File:Stacybitch.jpg|A literal stacy IRL.
File:Stupidwhorediebitchdieeee.jpg
File:HURTFEMINISM.jpg
File:Gender War.jpg
File:I Hate White Men.jpg
File:Be A Slave Or A Mother.jpg
File:Allwomenaresavagebeastsss.jpg
File:Womenaresavgemnstrs.jpg
File:Stupidbitchcuntdieho.png
File:Americanpsychokill.jpg
File:Standardsofwomen.png|Female "Logic"
File:Hilarity.jpg|Certain people can be considered bullshit at all times.
File:Superior wimminz.png
File:Feminist Monthly.jpg|Feminist Monthly
File:Criticize feminism.jpg
File:BettyFreidan.png|Betty Friedan (née:Goldstein){{Jew}} writer of [[TL;DR|The Feminine Mystique]] aka the Feminist [[Koran]]
File:Aposematism.jpg|Fair warning.
File:Feminism_Looks_Like_This.jpg
File:Vaginal_Shield.jpg|Cyber-Feminist Protection Unit.
File:368.jpg
File:Modern Feminism.jpg|[[Terrorist|Femorrists]]
File:Hooters.jpg|It's not hard to see the differences.
File:Wecantbake.jpg|If you can't bake, you better know how to suck a mean dick.
File:Feminists Gossip.jpg
File:Gamers_according_to_feminists_internet_aristocrat_zoe_quinn_five_guys_burgers_and_fries.jpg|[[Zoe Quinn|Thank you ISIS.]]
File:funnyfeminists.jpg
File:Feminism2011.jpg
File:Feminism_Gender_Studies_Degree.png
File:Feminism_Whole_Pie.jpg
File:Feminism_911.jpg
File:Feminism_Logic.jpg
File:What Feminists Think of Gay Porn.png|The female perspective on faggotry.
File:Shotgun wedding by hypergoldfish.jpg
File:1466560.jpg
File:Grammar-nazi-amp-gt-feminazi c 4073449.jpg
File:Feminazis-Karina-Billa-2014.jpg
File:995677 5223580.jpg
File:ZhDuwPH.jpg
File:Bitter femi nazi cartoon by conservatoons-d4g210k.jpg
File:Feminazism lmao.jpg
File:Familycourtcartoon.png
File:Classic feminazi 540.jpg
File:Femi4chandate.png
File:Rtfdsf.jpg|lol ever wondered what happens between the femies themselves?
File:Feminazies circumsize swedish lion military emblem.jpg|Castration is still relevant even if it's not a living being
File:Bb4saleukraine.jpg|Ukrainian femen activist offers pre-order of her baby
File:Kill-joys-kastle-main.jpg|femanist hood rats gang
File:57076027.jpg
File:Something right femies.png|This girl has no self respect and loves being raped - according to feminists
File:Anonymous feminist lel.jpg| lol
File:Ghujjrhjhsy.jpg
File:Falserapeaccusationinaction.png
File:Wagegaphorse.jpg
File:Bradford-1980.jpg
File:Feminazi Symbol 1.gif
File:Womens rights.jpg
File:Feminism_in_action.jpg
File:Missedthejoke.jpg‎|Another successful trolling.
File:Feminists fail western society.jpg|Arguments for serious discussion
File:Feminist degree fukjeh.jpg|SEIG HEIL
File:Feminazi_Bullshit.png|This is what Feminists like to believe.
File:Yahoo feminist lmao.jpg|This ugly motherfucker should also be castrated via steel shark teeth of the FEMINATOR!!
File:Feferi.jpg
File:Fem-anal.jpg
File:FalseRapeEvidence.gif
File:ManImprisonedFor28YearsAllegationDreamRape.jpg
File:UnderageSexSocietyDifferences.jpg
File:Feminism_-_Only_Rape_For_Women_01.jpg|Feminist "equality" all up in this bitch.
File:Feminism_-_Only_Rape_For_Women_02.jpg
File:Feminism_-_Only_Rape_For_Women_03.jpg
File:Totallywasntaskingforit.png|It's ALWAYS rape! Even when it isn't!
File:Feminism_-_Graffiti_Edit.jpg
File:Feminism Female Brain.jpg
File:Feminism Hair Styles.jpg
File:Modern feminism.gif
File:Feminism Liberal Western Values.jpg
File:Feminism Screaming At Men.jpg
File:Feminism Jewish Corruption And Influence.png
File:Feminism nasty Witch.png
File:Feminism Object.jpg
File:Feminism Demands Prince Charming.jpg
File:Feminism Dressing.png
File:White knights are fuckin bitches.jpg
File:What do I want to fight about today.jpg
File:Feminism Alcohol and Female Responsibility.jpg
File:I need feminism because.jpg
File:Shark Brain VS Vagina.jpg
File:All women want from you is everything.jpg
File:These arent the rights I wanted.png
File:I need feminism cuz.jpg
File:Cant Handle Strong Women.jpg
File:JOHN cLEESE ON eXTREMISM.jpg
File:Toiletbro.jpg
File:Feminist Warrior IRL.jpg
File:Feminism Equality Misinformed.jpg
File:Rays Pest Control.jpg
File:Men pls help.png
File:Feminism Teacher Irony.png
File:Feminism Dining.jpg
File:Feminists_Pissing_Hypocrisy.jpg
File:How_To_Disable_A_Female_Rapist.jpg|How to disable a female rapist.
File:How_To_Enrage_Feminists.jpg|How to enrage feminists.
File:Tampon_Opression.png
File:EmoFatFeminist.jpg|And fucking fat.
File:Koreanfeminazi.jpg|typical [[korean]] feminazi
File:Typicalkoreafemi.jpg|typical [[korean]] feminazi 2
File:Women - chivalry when they like it, sexism when they don't.jpg|
[[Image:Dongduk.jpg|thumb|Typical Korean Feminists' Protest Method]]
</gallery>
|}}

==Femies On Video Games==
<center>
{|
|[[File:Feminists on video games.png|400px|center]]
||
{{center|<youtube>xQkENXa9WNE</youtube>}} ''Incidentally, this is Sam Maggs, who is the '''assistant editor at [[TheMarySue]]'''''
|}</center>

<center>Feminist Video Games are SOCIAL JUSTICE</center>

{{center|<youtube>MkBbIF6ZXhw</youtube>}}

[[File:Terminate feminazi.png|thumb|center|300px|Feminazi game - "Feminator: Castration"]]

==In Conclusion==

[[File:Femitallica kill em all.jpg|center]]

==See Also==
[[Image:Rape poster2.jpg|thumb|right| Feminists slogan should be "No NEVER means no".]]
[[File:Feminism PTSD Melody Triggered.jpg|thumb|right|Because having anyone say you're wrong is RAPE.]]
[[File:ZoeAnitaUNbitchin.png|thumb|right|[[Anita Sarkeesian|Anita]] and [[Zoe Quinn|Zoe]] tell their [[First World Problems|super important womyns issues]] to the UN.]]
*[[Feminist]]
*[[Meninism]] — Men attempt to fight back against feminism and fail. Poorly.
*[[MRA]] — Men attempt to fight back against feminism and fail. Horribly.
*[[Nu-male]] — [[Pussies|Men]] with [[white guilt]] attempt to side with feminism and fail. Pathetically, and humiliated.
*[[Questionable logic]] — the ''only'' way this can be justified.
*[[Social Justice]]

'''Issues:'''

*[[Bitch]]es (and [[Bitches and whores|whores]])
*[[Castration]]
*[[Christina Hoff Sommers]] - GamerGate's favorite based mom.
*[[Cotton Ceiling]]
*[[Cunt]]
*[[Fat Princess]] — A video game that's already got feminist knickers in a twist.
*[[Femen]]
*[[GamerGate]]
*[[Gynaeolatry]]
*[[Kill it with Fire]]
*[[Kitchen]]
*[[Lesbian]]
*[[Domestic Violence]]
*[[Misogyny]]
*[[Pain]]
*[[Pinterest]] — Feminazi motivational posters everywhere.
*[[Please]]
*[[Politics and the city]] — A website intended to get women more interested in politics, but which correctly assumes that unless it's pink and fluffy then women won't be interested.
*[[Rape Checklist]]
*[[Vagina dentata]] — Their ultimate weapon
*[[Video Games]]

'''People:'''

*[[Adria Richards]]
*[[Andrea Dworkin]] CLASSIC SCREAMER in the 1970s and 80s, and makes everyone else in this list look like whiny scrota
*[[Anita Sarkeesian]] — The [[Sheneequa|Rosa Parks]] of Videogames Feminism.
*[[Brianna Wu]]
*[[Charlotte E. Smith]]
*[[Cheryl Abbate]] — puts the "[[Nazi]]" in "[[feminazi]]"
*[[Cheryl Lindsey Seelhoff]]
*[[Cynthia]]
*[[Dick Masterson]] — the anti-feminist
*[[Gail Dines]]
*[[GoddessMine]]
*[[Kesha]] — Further evidence that a well timed rape accusation can be beneficial to one's career.
*[[Lena Chen]] — 1) Sucked deancock to get into Harvard. 2) Advocated "Fuck Me" Feminism. 3) Posted her teacher [[Patrick Hamm]]'s cum on her face ([[:File:Lena_Chen_Facial.jpg|SRSly]]). 4) Got booted from Harvard. 5) ??? 6) PROFIT!!1
*[[Lena Dunham]] — because [[baby fuck|molesting]] your [[incest|sister]] is [[Lesbian pedophilia|feminist]].
*[[Liz Hawryluk]]
*[[Femitheist]]
*[[Mikeeusa]] — a valiant defender of the rights of woman
*[[Miriam Weeks]] — aka the Duke Porn Slut (Belle Knox)
*[[Mary Bell]] 10-year-old-girl that killed abd cut iff little boys' dicks
*[[Pinkiepony]] — The [[Hitler|Avril Lavigne]] of the brony fandom.
*[[Rebecca Watson]] — The Empress of [[Atheism+]]. Victim of being [[almost raped|hit on]] in a elevator.
*[https://www.google.com/search?q=Jess+Zimmerman&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8 Jess Zimmerman] - [http://web.archive.org/web/20141222120330/http://thepunditpress.com/2014/12/17/the-guardian-author-all-men-should-be-murdered/ Wants to kill] [http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/dec/16/ban-men-2014-women-misandry every man on the planet.] [[Srs bzns|Watch out, we got a badass over here]]
*[[Zarna Joshi]]
*[[Zoe Quinn]] - Fucked five guys in exchange for positive reviews on her shitty text indie "game" and to advance her current career.

'''Sites:'''

*[[Bioware]]
*[[Feminist Frequency]]
*[[ihatemen]]
*[[Jezebel]]
*[[Mumsnet]]
*[[NeoGAF]] - A hivemind full of delusional nu-male feminists
*[[RadFemSpeak.net]]
*[[ResetERA]]
*[[Shakesville]] — Feminist blog, run by Melissa McEwan, who happens to be fat, unsurprisingly
*[[SoSuave.net]] — feminist take on a [[retard]]ed pick-up advice site
*[[Tumblr]]
*[[Twitter]]
*[[The Mary Sue]]

==External Links==
[[File:Wikipedia category jew feminists.jpg|right|350px]]
*{{ljcomm|user=feminist}} - The LJ Feminist community. (Livejournal lol, also not updated since 2015)
*{{ljcomm|user=feminist_rage}} - Feminist Rage community, mainly devoted to [[Almost raped|rants]]. (Last update 2010 lol)
*{{ljcomm|user=feminazis}} - The true center of feminazi thought, the last redoubt of pure and unabashed [[feminazism]]. (Also not updated since 2010)
*{{dauser|razorwitch|Yet another feminist TARTlet}} (lol left in 2008 COWARD)
*[http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=feminazi Maddox debunks feminism]
*[http://www.womansavers.com boo hoo he fucked me and now he never calls, feminazis attack] (lol abandoned in 2014)
*[http://www.jesus-is-savior.com/Evils%20in%20America/Feminism/feminism_is_evil.htm Christian "heroes" expose feminism.]
*[http://blogfiles.wfmu.org/BL/0511/im/14_-_Kathy_Fire_-_Mother_Rage.mp3 Kathy Fire - MOTHERRAGE The Feminist National Anthem --You're long overdue for your hour of castration!!]
*[http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=2838369 TSR sexist thread started by a butthurt femenazi bitch that needs to STFU] (lol 2014)
*{{ytlink|ucO4ijwOUN8|Feminist BAWWWWW}}
*[http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=2838437 MOAR FEMENAZI RANTING! THE BUTTHURT CONTINUES!!!!1!11!]
*[http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/member.php?u=1548227 Feel free to troll the shit out of this whore...]
*[http://feministing.com/ Typical Feminist Website] (At least it's still being updated)
*[http://everydayfeminism.com/courses/ Feminists Trying too hard] (to masturbate)
*[http://www.gynarchy.org/ More Failure: a group promoting "Lesbian Supremacy"] (last update 2017)
*[http://www.womanthouartgod.com/hillaryprayintooffice.php Pray Hillary into Office] [[Slowpoke | Still there as of 2018!! LOLOLOL]]
*[http://future.wikia.com/wiki/RyansWorld:_Matriarchy Troll or SRS BSNS? The Feminazi Agenda] (loads of WTF)
*[http://www.manwomanmyth.com/ Tons of videos by random Britfag exposing the bullshit of Feminism] (nevermind, went down in 2015)
*[http://alphagameplan.blogspot.com/2013/07/why-feminized-societies-will-fail.html Why Feminism is FAIL, explained]
*http://answers.yahoo.com/dir/index;_ylt=Auy90HPmVJEzxyqVJbAo0ywjzKIX;_ylv=3?sid=396545307 'Gender and Women's Studies' - a feminazi propaganda category on the website 'Yahoo! Answers'. Much ''lulz'' ensues. (whups baleeted)
*http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/sian-dixon/twitter-abuse-isnt-a-censorship-issue_b_3682528.html
*http://web.archive.org/web/20141222120330/http://thepunditpress.com/2014/12/17/the-guardian-author-all-men-should-be-murdered/ - [[BRB|brb, slaughtering all men]] (lol deleted)
*http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/dec/16/ban-men-2014-women-misandry - [[ALL CAPS|MEN ARE SCUM, KILL THEM ALL]] (yeah whatev)
* [http://radicalprofeminist.blogspot.co.uk/ "This blog exists to support liberatory collectivist activism that is anti-patriarchy, anti-colonialism, and anti-capitalism. It also seeks to center the experiences, theories, and agendas of radical and feminist women of color."] - not a parody. Sample: "Thank goodness he was caught doing such vile violence (vile-lence) to her. Sexual violence has a long raced, classed history in Amerikkka, against women white and Black, Brown, and Indigenous."
* [http://www.thelocal.se/20161114/mansplaining-campaign-faces-sexism-backlash In an effort to combat 'mansplaining', a phenomenon in which men talk down to womben as if wummin are incapable of thinking for themselves,] a hotline has been set up in Sweden so that strong independent womyn who are experiencing such pernicious Patriarchal patronising can be [[Irony|told the best way to respond to it.]]

{{Retarded Edit Wars}}
{{Psychology}}
{{jews}}
{{truth}}
{{Social Justice}}

AND NOW... the punchline: {{colortext|white|You know how sometimes women just want to have a good old moan, and aren't expecting you to do anything, and then once they've offloaded they are quite happy again, until the next time they want to whinge to someone? Congratulations: you understand how to react to feminism.}}

== References ==
<references />

[[Category:Subcultures]]
[[Category:WikiEdit Drama]]

Singapore

2026-05-15T10:06:54Z

Gooksu: /* See Also */

{{Spoiler|SINGAPORE BANS CHEWING GUM AND LASHES HOMOSEXUALS WITH GLASS SHARD-TIPPED CANES!1}}
{{achtung|'''SLAVERY STILL EXISTS HERE AS A FORM OF [[Slavery|MAIDS]]! WE PUT THEM IN PARKS AT SUNDAYS ONLY. '''}}
[[Image:Singapore_Flyer.JPG|thumb|The Singapore Flyer, a very tall observation wheel. Which is a [[mind control|mind-controlling device]], in disguise, built by Lee Kuan Jew.]]

'''Singapore''' is a hermetically sealed corporate biosphere located between [[China]] and [[Malaysia]]. While the population is brainwashed to believe the 4-star joint (Chinese 7 star) is an independent [[Demockery|pseudo-republic]], the estate is in fact a Chinese Insular Outlying Territory, leased for 150 years by Beijing to His Perpetual Excellency Lee Kuan Jew.

Owned by the [[China|Master Race]], the island is mostly an absolute clusterfuck of [[Malaysia|Malays]], [[India|Indians]] and slaves from the south. [[Niggers]] and [[Arab|the other kind]] are a rarity, and the majorly conservative white population play the honored role of vermin. Bangladeshis are to Singapore as the [[Russia|Russian]] are to Europe.

Surrounded by [[Terrorist|Muslim]] nations like [[Malaysia]] and [[Indonesia|Indonesia]], Singapore is under constant threat and is left paranoid and clutching a rusty knife behind its back.

==Language and Culture==
[[Image:Batman-bin-suparman.jpg|thumb|This Spore's ID reads, [[O rly|"Batman son of Suparman"]]. ]]
[[Image:Typical_Singaporean.jpg|thumb|[[Retard|Typical Singaporean]] under the delusion that no one dares to oppose him (a.k.a being an epic [[Fail|failure]])]]
Singapore has four official languages: Singlish, [[English]], [[Moonspeak|Malay, Chinese and Tamil]].

The Singaporeans, or Spores, have their own abortion of the English language known as "Singlish". It's most popular with the locals, despite the efforts of his Supreme Excellency Lee Kuan Jew. Ever since the [[United Kingdom|British]] abandoned the colony of Singapore, the immigrants decided to add [[moonspeak]] to English. Singlish is so complicated and stupid that it has an [[over 9000]] word article on [[Wikipedia]]. For example, all Singaporeans have the undying urge to add the word 'lah' or 'leh' at the end of every sentence. This is because they want to speak and sing at the same time.

The capital of Singapore is Singapore City, where all the [[Greedy|evil lawyers and supreme judges]] that make up 40% of the population live and work. Singapore is half the size of New York City but 888% cleaner and safer. This is because, very much like [[Malaysia]], the Singaporeans execute litter bugs, people who chew gum and drug smuggling [[Australia|Asstrailians]] on a weekly basis by hanging. In fact, hanging is an official national pastime and sport. Unlike the pussy [[Americunts]], who quietly waste thousands of gallons of poison to put a convict to sleep, Singaporeans [[BDSM|get off at seeing people suffering slowly and tenderly]].

Among other national pastimes are maid abuse, since 70% of marriages in Singapore either end up in the death of a maid, kidnapping of a child, or family suicide. [[poor|The latter is especially easy as 80% of the population live high-rise flats called HDBs]]. Which is another secret government project to control the population. It is very common to own a [[slave|maid]], in other words a [[slave]], in Singapore. 90% of the population that isn't poor, which is 100% of the population as the government executes bums and hobos, has a slave in the household. This is an attribute picked up by their ancestors from the British who had Indian slaves.

==Religion==

Singapore's religious scene is one gigantic fucking gang bang. [[Shota|Churches]], [[Terrorist|Mosques]], [[Buddha|Monasteries]], [[wut|Taoist temples]], and even Jew plague the island nation. Despite claiming that it is a multi-cultural society, [[LOL|Jehovah's Witnesses is officially a banned religion]]. Without Lee Kuan Jew's supreme leadership, Singapore would be another part of the [[Muslim|Islamic Empire]].

==Government==
[[Image:Singapore rofr.jpg|thumb|right|In Singapore, corruption is legal. [http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5jnULe8i45Ph9CxIrX-HzdYXsv6RAD9E7Q8502 Chewing gum though, is not].]]
[[Image:Lee_Kuan_Yew.jpg|thumb|left|Lee Kuan Jew, the Supreme and outright leader of Singapore.]]
Singapore is under the leadership of his Supreme Excellency Lee Kuan Jew and his son Prime Minister Lee Hsien [[longcat|Loong]]. Together, they use Singapore as a big money making generator to feed their ever growing wallets. Prime Minister Lee Hsien [[longcat|Loong]] earns S$1,958,000 a year, he achieves this by lowering taxes but having secret tax traps everywhere else. One form of this secret taxing is sneakily placing ERP (Every Road Pay (Electronic Road Pricing)) gantries all over roads that lead in and out of Singapore City to tax the [[Greedy|evil lawyers and supreme judges]].

To protect Lee Kuan Jew's money, the government has two years of forced [[military|national service]] for all males who are 18 years old. If [[you]] chose to default, Lee Kuan Jew will personally [[ban|ban and exile]] you from his country or jail you till you rot. This is also an effective method for detecting [[homosexual|faggots]]. Once a faggot is detected, he is filed under Category 302 and discretely put into a position in the armed forces where there are no other [[fags]] for 100 miles and has no access to military intelligence. Since all Muslims are [[terrorists]] and [[9/11|suicide bombers]], they would not prove effective against other terrorists from neighbouring [[Islam|Malaysia and Indonesia]]. Thus most Muslims are posted in the Police Force to serve their national service. Lee Kuan Jew knows that Muslims with guns equals [[terrorists]].

Because Singapore is surrounded by the [[Islam|Islamic Empire]], Lee Kuan Jew has no other choice but to dump what's left of his S$1,958,000 into the Singapore Armed Forces. Since most Singaporeans have [[Retard|extremely low IQ]], most are given positions like truck driver or combat engineer. The result is an army of truck drivers and engineers.

Archeologists debate the true age of this [[Oldfag|bag of bones]], but [[Noone]] can even remember how he came to be. Stories of him permabanning people from life for possession of catnip, [[Sick_fuck|public masturbation]] and other [[IRL trolling|lulzy shenanigans]] have been passed down through the oral tradition of bards so he is assumed to be of [[over_9000|seniority]].

The government also enjoys banning random shit for no apparent reason. They also enjoy not offering a reason for why they ban the random shit that they do.

==Singapore Airlines==
[[Image:Singapore_Girl.jpg|thumb|A handful of clones from The Grand Army of Singapore Airlines. Known as, "Singapore Girls".]]
Singapore is most known by its elitist international airlines, Singapore Airlines(SIA). [[Nobody_gives_a_fuck|It boasts a first world airport, Changi Airport, in Singapore. It also was the first to fly the A380 commercially]]. All of the air stewards are either failed beauticians, ex-hookers or clowns; as they are always seen with a face full of make up that is at least an inch thick. Flights only enter Singapore. No one ever leaves Singapore. Singapore Girls are also known as flying whores, as they provide for the tourists who come visit the lovely island that is Singapore and never leave.

The silly [[Australia|Australians]] and [[Canadia|Canadians]] had to ban SIA from entering their airports because they [[victim complex|felt threatened]] by the competition.

==Summary of Singapore==
- Chewing gum is banned. Nobody knows why, but it is. Possession is fine [[wtf|as long as it's not for retail]]. 
- Hanging convicts occurs so often that [[nobody cares|nobody even cares anymore]]. 
- [[BDSM|Caning]] is a favorite pastime for cops on the island.
- [[America|Likes to stick its nose in places where it doesn't belong]] 
- Is better off than the rest of South East Asia 
- Has ridiculous laws and [[police|police enforcement]] 
- Has a threatening elitist airlines 
- Singaporeans are closet racists. 
- Singaporeans are whiny bitches over how [[fact|their life sucks]].
- Is [[Nazi|the most globally approved nanny state]]

==Lulzy Shit==

- The best way to troll the Stinkapore Police Farce is to keep asking them where the fuck [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mas_Selamat_bin_Kastari Mas Selamat] is. Update: He is in Malaysia Jail now after a year escaping from the Singapore Police. Update 2 : He was caught by *Malaysian* police, who refuse to extradite him on grounds of 'national security'. Proves that the Malaysian authorities can get the job done with far lower pay than their Singaporean counterparts (i.e. cheap).

- Another way to troll them is to just hold up a smiley face you drew on some cardboard, that's enough to get you v&.

==Additional Singaporean Fun==
===Hip and cool===
It's possible to troll typical Singaporeans by telling them:

1.Typical Singaporeans are humorless cunts.

2.There was no word for "creativity" in their language until the [[white_devils|British]] squatted there.

3.All 3 Singapore Idol winner are Malays, even though Malays are a minority in Singapore (the lazy-ass Chinese majority don't even bother to vote because the show is shit).

4.The life time ambition of all Singaporean women is to marry, date or at least get knocked up by Ang Moh (slang for Jew).

5.If a Singaporean loses their job, they blame their government, immigrants, foreign expatriates, ur mom, etc. instead of acknowledging the fact that they are simply a ambitionless cunt.

6. Miss Singaporean 2009 is a [[slut]], a [[thief]], a [[liar]] and an ex-convict. She is also [[stupid|unable to spell]] ex-convict. Makes for serious lulz.

==Singapore, the Second Israel of Asia==
{{Quote|Israel–Singapore relations are foreign relations between Israel and Singapore. Relations between the two countries are extremely cordial, and they are known to share a Special Relationship.}}

Like [[Japan]], Singapore is a special kind of country, small, no resources and surrounded by enemies

'''SIMILARITIES BETWEEN ISRAEL AND SINGAPORE:'''
* Both countries are surrounded by [[batshit insane]] [[Muslim]] nations that could destroy them at anytime.

* Both invest too much in their Air Force

* In both countries, all Muslims are made to go for a year of reconditioning and torture to prevent terrorist attacks. Sweden tried it but it was just a kiddy palace (Swedes let certified terrorists run around killing infidels).

* Extremely fucking rich (WITH JEWS YOU LOSE).

* Both are massive arms-dealers.

* The Jewnited States gives all 3 free military equipment.

* Though all three love acting all "Multicultural" and "Tolerant", Japan, Singapore and Israel are all secretly extremely racist!

* All citizens are mind-controlled.

* Average IQ of all of them is about 120.

==See Also==
*[[China]]
*[[Hong Kong]]
*[[Israel]]
*[[South Korea]]
*[[Indonesia]]
*[[Taiwan]]
*[[Malaysia]]
*[[Jews]]

==External Links==

<center>{{fv|Singapore!!|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;|<youtube>ksw2UqTyhhc</youtube>|<youtube>nN829IyRWSc</youtube> '''Friendly Singaporeans'''|<youtube>V4jPtLhOT9M</youtube> '''Friendly Singaporeans'''|<youtube>forcMEgEsno</youtube> '''Friendly Singaporeans'''|<youtube>JoTqRQ29Od8</youtube> '''Goddamned ERP'''|<youtube>FojuOk7DZS8</youtube> '''Mating Habits'''|<youtube>sqoQDZ1vXd0</youtube> '''Education System'''}}</center>

[[Category: Locations]]
{{azn}}
{{commonwealth}}
{{Qing}}
[[Category:Locations]]

Singapore

2026-05-15T10:04:26Z

Gooksu:

{{Spoiler|SINGAPORE BANS CHEWING GUM AND LASHES HOMOSEXUALS WITH GLASS SHARD-TIPPED CANES!1}}
{{achtung|'''SLAVERY STILL EXISTS HERE AS A FORM OF [[Slavery|MAIDS]]! WE PUT THEM IN PARKS AT SUNDAYS ONLY. '''}}
[[Image:Singapore_Flyer.JPG|thumb|The Singapore Flyer, a very tall observation wheel. Which is a [[mind control|mind-controlling device]], in disguise, built by Lee Kuan Jew.]]

'''Singapore''' is a hermetically sealed corporate biosphere located between [[China]] and [[Malaysia]]. While the population is brainwashed to believe the 4-star joint (Chinese 7 star) is an independent [[Demockery|pseudo-republic]], the estate is in fact a Chinese Insular Outlying Territory, leased for 150 years by Beijing to His Perpetual Excellency Lee Kuan Jew.

Owned by the [[China|Master Race]], the island is mostly an absolute clusterfuck of [[Malaysia|Malays]], [[India|Indians]] and slaves from the south. [[Niggers]] and [[Arab|the other kind]] are a rarity, and the majorly conservative white population play the honored role of vermin. Bangladeshis are to Singapore as the [[Russia|Russian]] are to Europe.

Surrounded by [[Terrorist|Muslim]] nations like [[Malaysia]] and [[Indonesia|Indonesia]], Singapore is under constant threat and is left paranoid and clutching a rusty knife behind its back.

==Language and Culture==
[[Image:Batman-bin-suparman.jpg|thumb|This Spore's ID reads, [[O rly|"Batman son of Suparman"]]. ]]
[[Image:Typical_Singaporean.jpg|thumb|[[Retard|Typical Singaporean]] under the delusion that no one dares to oppose him (a.k.a being an epic [[Fail|failure]])]]
Singapore has four official languages: Singlish, [[English]], [[Moonspeak|Malay, Chinese and Tamil]].

The Singaporeans, or Spores, have their own abortion of the English language known as "Singlish". It's most popular with the locals, despite the efforts of his Supreme Excellency Lee Kuan Jew. Ever since the [[United Kingdom|British]] abandoned the colony of Singapore, the immigrants decided to add [[moonspeak]] to English. Singlish is so complicated and stupid that it has an [[over 9000]] word article on [[Wikipedia]]. For example, all Singaporeans have the undying urge to add the word 'lah' or 'leh' at the end of every sentence. This is because they want to speak and sing at the same time.

The capital of Singapore is Singapore City, where all the [[Greedy|evil lawyers and supreme judges]] that make up 40% of the population live and work. Singapore is half the size of New York City but 888% cleaner and safer. This is because, very much like [[Malaysia]], the Singaporeans execute litter bugs, people who chew gum and drug smuggling [[Australia|Asstrailians]] on a weekly basis by hanging. In fact, hanging is an official national pastime and sport. Unlike the pussy [[Americunts]], who quietly waste thousands of gallons of poison to put a convict to sleep, Singaporeans [[BDSM|get off at seeing people suffering slowly and tenderly]].

Among other national pastimes are maid abuse, since 70% of marriages in Singapore either end up in the death of a maid, kidnapping of a child, or family suicide. [[poor|The latter is especially easy as 80% of the population live high-rise flats called HDBs]]. Which is another secret government project to control the population. It is very common to own a [[slave|maid]], in other words a [[slave]], in Singapore. 90% of the population that isn't poor, which is 100% of the population as the government executes bums and hobos, has a slave in the household. This is an attribute picked up by their ancestors from the British who had Indian slaves.

==Religion==

Singapore's religious scene is one gigantic fucking gang bang. [[Shota|Churches]], [[Terrorist|Mosques]], [[Buddha|Monasteries]], [[wut|Taoist temples]], and even Jew plague the island nation. Despite claiming that it is a multi-cultural society, [[LOL|Jehovah's Witnesses is officially a banned religion]]. Without Lee Kuan Jew's supreme leadership, Singapore would be another part of the [[Muslim|Islamic Empire]].

==Government==
[[Image:Singapore rofr.jpg|thumb|right|In Singapore, corruption is legal. [http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5jnULe8i45Ph9CxIrX-HzdYXsv6RAD9E7Q8502 Chewing gum though, is not].]]
[[Image:Lee_Kuan_Yew.jpg|thumb|left|Lee Kuan Jew, the Supreme and outright leader of Singapore.]]
Singapore is under the leadership of his Supreme Excellency Lee Kuan Jew and his son Prime Minister Lee Hsien [[longcat|Loong]]. Together, they use Singapore as a big money making generator to feed their ever growing wallets. Prime Minister Lee Hsien [[longcat|Loong]] earns S$1,958,000 a year, he achieves this by lowering taxes but having secret tax traps everywhere else. One form of this secret taxing is sneakily placing ERP (Every Road Pay (Electronic Road Pricing)) gantries all over roads that lead in and out of Singapore City to tax the [[Greedy|evil lawyers and supreme judges]].

To protect Lee Kuan Jew's money, the government has two years of forced [[military|national service]] for all males who are 18 years old. If [[you]] chose to default, Lee Kuan Jew will personally [[ban|ban and exile]] you from his country or jail you till you rot. This is also an effective method for detecting [[homosexual|faggots]]. Once a faggot is detected, he is filed under Category 302 and discretely put into a position in the armed forces where there are no other [[fags]] for 100 miles and has no access to military intelligence. Since all Muslims are [[terrorists]] and [[9/11|suicide bombers]], they would not prove effective against other terrorists from neighbouring [[Islam|Malaysia and Indonesia]]. Thus most Muslims are posted in the Police Force to serve their national service. Lee Kuan Jew knows that Muslims with guns equals [[terrorists]].

Because Singapore is surrounded by the [[Islam|Islamic Empire]], Lee Kuan Jew has no other choice but to dump what's left of his S$1,958,000 into the Singapore Armed Forces. Since most Singaporeans have [[Retard|extremely low IQ]], most are given positions like truck driver or combat engineer. The result is an army of truck drivers and engineers.

Archeologists debate the true age of this [[Oldfag|bag of bones]], but [[Noone]] can even remember how he came to be. Stories of him permabanning people from life for possession of catnip, [[Sick_fuck|public masturbation]] and other [[IRL trolling|lulzy shenanigans]] have been passed down through the oral tradition of bards so he is assumed to be of [[over_9000|seniority]].

The government also enjoys banning random shit for no apparent reason. They also enjoy not offering a reason for why they ban the random shit that they do.

==Singapore Airlines==
[[Image:Singapore_Girl.jpg|thumb|A handful of clones from The Grand Army of Singapore Airlines. Known as, "Singapore Girls".]]
Singapore is most known by its elitist international airlines, Singapore Airlines(SIA). [[Nobody_gives_a_fuck|It boasts a first world airport, Changi Airport, in Singapore. It also was the first to fly the A380 commercially]]. All of the air stewards are either failed beauticians, ex-hookers or clowns; as they are always seen with a face full of make up that is at least an inch thick. Flights only enter Singapore. No one ever leaves Singapore. Singapore Girls are also known as flying whores, as they provide for the tourists who come visit the lovely island that is Singapore and never leave.

The silly [[Australia|Australians]] and [[Canadia|Canadians]] had to ban SIA from entering their airports because they [[victim complex|felt threatened]] by the competition.

==Summary of Singapore==
- Chewing gum is banned. Nobody knows why, but it is. Possession is fine [[wtf|as long as it's not for retail]]. 
- Hanging convicts occurs so often that [[nobody cares|nobody even cares anymore]]. 
- [[BDSM|Caning]] is a favorite pastime for cops on the island.
- [[America|Likes to stick its nose in places where it doesn't belong]] 
- Is better off than the rest of South East Asia 
- Has ridiculous laws and [[police|police enforcement]] 
- Has a threatening elitist airlines 
- Singaporeans are closet racists. 
- Singaporeans are whiny bitches over how [[fact|their life sucks]].
- Is [[Nazi|the most globally approved nanny state]]

==Lulzy Shit==

- The best way to troll the Stinkapore Police Farce is to keep asking them where the fuck [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mas_Selamat_bin_Kastari Mas Selamat] is. Update: He is in Malaysia Jail now after a year escaping from the Singapore Police. Update 2 : He was caught by *Malaysian* police, who refuse to extradite him on grounds of 'national security'. Proves that the Malaysian authorities can get the job done with far lower pay than their Singaporean counterparts (i.e. cheap).

- Another way to troll them is to just hold up a smiley face you drew on some cardboard, that's enough to get you v&.

==Additional Singaporean Fun==
===Hip and cool===
It's possible to troll typical Singaporeans by telling them:

1.Typical Singaporeans are humorless cunts.

2.There was no word for "creativity" in their language until the [[white_devils|British]] squatted there.

3.All 3 Singapore Idol winner are Malays, even though Malays are a minority in Singapore (the lazy-ass Chinese majority don't even bother to vote because the show is shit).

4.The life time ambition of all Singaporean women is to marry, date or at least get knocked up by Ang Moh (slang for Jew).

5.If a Singaporean loses their job, they blame their government, immigrants, foreign expatriates, ur mom, etc. instead of acknowledging the fact that they are simply a ambitionless cunt.

6. Miss Singaporean 2009 is a [[slut]], a [[thief]], a [[liar]] and an ex-convict. She is also [[stupid|unable to spell]] ex-convict. Makes for serious lulz.

==Singapore, the Second Israel of Asia==
{{Quote|Israel–Singapore relations are foreign relations between Israel and Singapore. Relations between the two countries are extremely cordial, and they are known to share a Special Relationship.}}

Like [[Japan]], Singapore is a special kind of country, small, no resources and surrounded by enemies

'''SIMILARITIES BETWEEN ISRAEL AND SINGAPORE:'''
* Both countries are surrounded by [[batshit insane]] [[Muslim]] nations that could destroy them at anytime.

* Both invest too much in their Air Force

* In both countries, all Muslims are made to go for a year of reconditioning and torture to prevent terrorist attacks. Sweden tried it but it was just a kiddy palace (Swedes let certified terrorists run around killing infidels).

* Extremely fucking rich (WITH JEWS YOU LOSE).

* Both are massive arms-dealers.

* The Jewnited States gives all 3 free military equipment.

* Though all three love acting all "Multicultural" and "Tolerant", Japan, Singapore and Israel are all secretly extremely racist!

* All citizens are mind-controlled.

* Average IQ of all of them is about 120.

==See Also==
*[[China]]
*[[Hong Kong]]
*[[Israel]]
*[[Indonesia]]
*[[Taiwan]]
*[[Malaysia]]
*[[Jews]]

==External Links==

<center>{{fv|Singapore!!|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;|<youtube>ksw2UqTyhhc</youtube>|<youtube>nN829IyRWSc</youtube> '''Friendly Singaporeans'''|<youtube>V4jPtLhOT9M</youtube> '''Friendly Singaporeans'''|<youtube>forcMEgEsno</youtube> '''Friendly Singaporeans'''|<youtube>JoTqRQ29Od8</youtube> '''Goddamned ERP'''|<youtube>FojuOk7DZS8</youtube> '''Mating Habits'''|<youtube>sqoQDZ1vXd0</youtube> '''Education System'''}}</center>

[[Category: Locations]]
{{azn}}
{{commonwealth}}
{{Qing}}
[[Category:Locations]]

Cambodia

2026-05-15T10:02:55Z

Gooksu:

{{crapstub}}
{{Warzone}}
'''Cambodia''' is a shithole country known for tons of [[gooks]]. It is similar to neighboring [[Vietnam]] in that it's a commie-run shithole country run by azn cryptojews. It is a puppet state of [[China]] and run by a stoner named [[Pol Pot]] and Nuon Chea. The chief of navy is Meas Muth. All are convicted war criminals and they don't want it any other way.

The main business of the Cambodian economy is receiving tribute from [[Chink]] criminal organizations in exchange for condoning their kidnapping of foreigners and committing [[Scam|Scams]].
== see also ==
* [[Azn]]
* [[Scam]]

{{commonwealth}}
{{azn}}
{{Qing}}

Cambodia

2026-05-15T10:02:05Z

Gooksu:

{{crapstub}}
{{Warzone}}
'''Cambodia''' is a shithole country known for tons of [[gooks]]. It is similar to neighboring [[Vietnam]] in that it's a commie-run shithole country run by azn cryptojews. It is a puppet state of [[China]] and run by a stoner named [[Pol Pot]] and Nuon Chea. The chief of navy is Meas Muth. All are convicted war criminals and they don't want it any other way.

The main business of the Cambodian economy is receiving tribute from criminal organizations in exchange for condoning their kidnapping of foreigners and committing [[scams]].
== see also ==
* [[Azn]]
* [[Scam]]

{{commonwealth}}
{{azn}}
{{Qing}}

Cambodia

2026-05-15T09:59:27Z

Gooksu: /* see also */

Cambodia

2026-05-15T09:57:52Z

Gooksu:

Gun

2026-05-15T08:33:05Z

Gooksu: /* Arisaka Type 99 */

{{needsmore|guns}}
[[File:Boob guns.gif|300px|right]]
A '''Gun''' is a very effective point-and-click [[IRL]] [[Ban hammer|banhammer]], often deployed by [[Erectile Dysfunction|impotent]] [[Wanker|wankers]] who are [[butthurt]] because they won't get what they want through [[Work|hard work]], [[intelligence]], [[love]], [[creativity]], enterprise or other human virtues, and want to act out their frustration and inadequacy through IRL [[Troll|trolling]] and [[Pwn|pwning]] others.
'''Guns''' are what [[Americunts]] have instead of [[penis]]es, while britfags (the major proponents of [[gun control]]) are forced to suffer through their microscopic penile reality by taking [[ketamine|party drugs]] and drowning themselves in tea and crumpets. The [[Internet]] has a huge guns, weapons and military related subculture, with numerous websites catering for all [[fetish|preferences]]. Some are filled to the brim with [[13 year old boys|16 year olds]] who don't have a fucking clue and generally just spout the latest bullshit from ''Future Weapons'', the weapons menu on ''Counter-Strike'', ''Modern Warfare 2'', or the latest article from ''Soldier of Fortune'' if they are really advanced. Below is your guide to this delightful phenomenon.

==Controversy==
There are four types of people:
:* [[Rednecks|Cool people]] who understand that the right to own guns is [[awesome]]
:* Idiots who believe the above are compensating for tiny dicks and demand that [[Fascist|only the army and police be allowed to have guns]]
:* Non-idiots who actually use guns, and know that both of the above are [[correct]] at times
:* [[Moralfags]] from [[British empire|countries other than the USA]], who think that [[Fact|Americans are the funniest people in the world, particularly when it comes to guns.]]

The Brady Bill: The Brady Handgun Lulz Prevention Act, more commonly known as "The Brady Bill", was put into place in 1993 after [[John Hinckley Jr.]] tried to [[Epic Win|kill Reagan]]. His press secretary, Jim Brady got in the way of this very lulzy act and was [[crippled|left paralyzed]]. Common consensus is that he deserved it. Brady, [[butthurt]] as hell, became a gun law supporter. Proving that they have no sense of humor, [[Congress]] then put into place this act which would require a background check on firearms purchasers and a waiting period for handguns. According to [[liberals]], these provisions have prevented any [[Columbine|subsequent]] [[Virginia_Tech_Massacre|tragedies]] [[Fort_Hood|of]] [[Sandy Hook Elementary Massacre|any]] [[Pulse Nightclub Massacre|kind]] [[2017 Las Vegas Shooting|whatsoever]]; [[Lie|Democracy works!]] Gun Nuts have a strange sexual relationship with this act, because on one hand it takes away their rights!!!one!!!OMG11!. But on the other hand, they tried to kill their god [[Reagan]], who can do no wrong in their books, and because he signed this act into law, it must be obeyed, even if stricken down by later acts of congress.

==The Way of the Gun==

Guns were made by [[Jesus]] Christ after realizing his favorite country, the United States, needed something to spread the gospel to [[Indian|savages]]. Jesus himself invented the first gun, and armed with the power of [[Christianity]], and a factory of [[India]]n sweatshop workers, to bring peace and justice to the free world, by ridding us of the lesser races and [[Muslims|non-believers]].

== Choose Your Weapon ==

{|width=100% border=20px
|colspan=6 align=center|Choose Your Weapon
|-
|align=center width=20%|Rifles
|align=center width=20%|Handguns
|align=center width=20%|Submachine Guns
|align=center width=20%|Machine Guns
|align=center width=20%|Other
|align=center width=20%|Calibers
|-
|align=center|[-+]
|align=center|[-+]
|align=center|[-+]
|align=center|[-+]
|align=center|[-+]
|align=center|[-+]
|}

<div id="mw-customcollapsible-content1" class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed"><div style="border:1px solid #CCCCCC; padding:8px">'''Rifles''' are a common and extremely difficult to conceal type of gun. Used to assasinate presidents by [[Terrorists|freedom fighters]], to [[pwn]] animals by [[rednecks]] and to [[murder|silence]] [[Arabs]] by [[Israeli]] and [[United States]] soldiers.

====AR-15 / M-16 / M4 Carbine====

The AR-15 is the iconic weapon of the red-blooded [[KKK|'murricun]]. If you carry this piece you are out on a holy crusade to end the lives of all communists, [[Irony|Nazis]], [[Democrat]]s, towel-heads, [[James Holmes|Batman fans]], evolutionary biologists, Jews, and the occasional [[Catholic]], 'cause we all know those Mary-worshipers have it coming.

During development, the M16 was picked up by the U.S. Army which was struggling because potheads, the primary demographic for recruitment in the 1960s, couldn't handle the [[3Guys1Hammer|hammering recoil]] of the M14. The M16A1 model helped resolve that problem by introducing a rifle that wouldn't fire at all. The A2 and A3 incarnations solved the reliability problems but introduced one of the worst [[fail|features]] in modern firearms which quickly started showing up on every other assault rifle and SMG, the 3-round burst. Originally intended to save ammo and increase accuracy over a fully automatic fire mode, the 3-round burst was devised for those not smart enough to figure out that you don't have to go [[batshit]] and hold the trigger till the gun don't fire no mo'. The civilian version is the semi-auto AR-15. It's one of the cheapest (can be had for less than $1000), most popular ([[wincest|inbred]] [[rednecks]] love it), most accurate (many can shoot sub 1 MOA out of the box), most common (It seems like Christ and Everybody makes AR-15s, there are [[Over 9000 |A LOT]] of AR-15 makers out there), and most modular semi-auto rifles used by [[Americunts]]. Many people who buy AR-15s then trick them out with scopes, foregrips, flashlights, and vibrators [[Fail|just to shoot at empty beer cans]] because they're hillbillies [[oxymoron|too stupid to join the military]]. When an AR-15 faggot is describing his weapon, you can be sure it will result in an immediate [[Sleep|snorefest]]. The M16 is so prolific there have been many offshoots of the design, some of the most notable being the .50-caliber Beowulf slug launcher, many chambered in 7.62mm NATO, target shooting conversions for .22LR, foreign modifications like the [[Nazi]] HK416.

If you mention the M16/AR-15 on most gun boards or forums you'll spark a [[flame war]] more [[Extreme|intense]] than the one that killed the [[Waco|Branch Davidians]]. [[troll|Bonus points]] if you tell them they are all wrong and the M16 should have been chambered in .30-06, have a 100-round drum, and fire full auto.

====AK-47====

[[File:Ak47kid.jpg|thumb|right|Typical AK-47 user]]
Designed to be easily used by child soldiers and [[niggers|poorly trained conscripts]], the AK-47 was spread throughout the world by Tony Stark in a cave. The rifle is simple in construction and fairly robust, using a gas-piston made to looser tolerances than [[your mom|any other gas-piston rifle]] out there. It has great popularity amongst, well, [[Communist]]s, [[terrorist]]s, and [[anon|guys that want to spree-kill their neighbors]]. And [[Colton Tooley|college Sophomores]]. Most that you'll come across in real life are [[China|Chinese]] or Eastern European knock-offs, actual [[Russia]]n models being rare. The AK can be found wherever there are angry Arab and [[gooks]]. It's the single best way to ruin GIs [[IRL]]. The AK-47 is the most well known firearm in the world and is a symbol of both freedom and opression by [[niggers|those dumb enough]] to live in [[africa|third world countries]], it also withstands environmental situations (mud, underwater, etc) that most other guns cannot bear with. [[Shit nobody cares about|Actually, faggots, the AK-47 is an obscure early model, nowhere near as popular as the later AKM variant. Almost 99.8% of the AK-47s you see worldwide are in fact AKMs, distinguished by the stamped and riveted sheet metal receiver and muzzle compensator.]] The more you know...

AK-47 vs. M16 threads are woefully common in any weapons-related forum. The usual crap of accuracy vs. reliability is rehashed and fucked up for yet another inning. On many websites, Military Photos and AR-15.com notably, this kind of crap will get you raped by the [[Banhammer|admins]]. You deserve it, you little bastard, because no self-respecting [[Banhammer]] will tolerate under-deodorized [[13 year old boys]] bitching about [[Shit nobody cares about|the M-16 being so much more ''accurate'' than the AK-47 or the AK-47 being so much more ''durable'' than the M16]]. Either way, both guns can still clear a middle school classroom faster than kicking down the door and shouting "Immigration and Customs Enforcement!" at a [[Spics|LULAC]] meeting.

{{center|<gallery>
File:Hawkins Mall Shooter.jpg||The AK-47 can be a formidable weapon in the [[Robert Hawkins|right hands]]
File:Ak47.jpg
File:Ak47pic.jpg
File:Ak47shit.png
</gallery>}}

====Aks-74u====
This is a miniature version of the AK-47's modern equivalent, the AK-74. It's small enough to fit in your jeans pocket and to be carried one-handed. Perfect for school shootings, because it will give you street cred, even if you're a [[Wigger]] (and you are). Also good for drive-by's due to its compact size, the AKS-74U is every [[Gangster]]'s dream. and, of course, the ultimate Arab Osama Bin Frickin' Laden carried one of these babies, ensuring that [[rule 34]] applies even in a cave in Afghanistan. Some consider it an SMG, but just because they don't know how to properly use it.

PROTIP: Just because the dumbfucks who made Call of Duty 4 call this a submachine gun does NOT make it an actual submachine gun. The AKs-74u fires the same 5.45x39mm rounds as the AK-74, making it an assault rifle.

====SVD====
[[File:Svd2c.JPG|thumb|Keep dreaming...]]
Like the M14, but tailor made for the same poorly trained 3rd world child armies that employ the AK-47. Except the ones that get SVDs are the ones that don't have [[ADHD]] and actually paid attention and tried during target practice at Camp Durka. Also holds the title of '''Biggest Life Ruiner Of American Soldiers 1963-Now''', largely in part due to [[Juba the Baghdad Sniper]]. However, Since [[Bill Clinton]] thought that genuine Russian-made arms like SVDs, original AKs and even the chink bootleg versions were [[This is why we can't have nice things|nice things]], which means we can't have them, SVDs are really rare and even chink copies go for [[Over 9000|over $3000]] which means you and your [[Call of Duty 4|COD4]] buddies have a snowball's chance in hell of getting one and will have to settle for a Romanian PSL, which is basically a cheap AK with a long barrel and spiffy buttstock.

====M14====
[[File:M14_is_porn.jpg|thumb|Hawt.]]

Before the sweet-sixteen there was the M14, a beastly [[inbred|pure-bred]] American piece made of wood, iron, and cock. If you don't mind the fact it kicks like a date-rape scene gone horrible wrong then you can't go wrong with its 7.62x51mm NATO truck stopping power. If a Sand Mexican is having himself a little pow-wow with roasted marshmallows and sing-alongs behind that reinforced sandbag teepee, and your 5.56x45mm NATO ain't cutting it, never fear! Your M14 will punch right through that sandwiched dirt and give Haji a splintering sensation of our constitutional right to kick ass and take names (and lunch money in some cases), even if their names are written in squiggly lines. Just don't mistake it for a machine gun.

Unfortunately, the U.S. military made this mistake by implementing a full-auto function for this gun. The powerful kick of the 7.62x51mm ammunition caused such massive muzzle climb that soldiers in the jungles of Vietnam couldn't hit gooks in full auto, even when they were executing villagers at point blank range. Because of this, and despite the M14's major [[pwnage]] potential, it was replaced by the pussy-recoil M16 as a standard issue rifle.

Like the climax of every Disney sports movie, the M14 has made a sudden comeback, sans full-auto capability. With the rise of [[Chris Benoit|anabolic steroids]] and a need to [[Headshot|spread democracy]] at ranges exceeding 400 meters, the M14 has met a revival with snipers and designated marksmen in the lulzfests of Afghanistan and [[Iraq]]. With generations of retards raised on [[counterstrike]] and a whole desert full of people in need of some [[death|democracy]], the future for this once forgotten rifle looks brighter than ever!

====FN FAL====

[[File:FALfail.jpg|thumb|[[DO NOT WANT]]]]

The [[democracy|right arm of the free world]]. This rifle killed communists, [[Africa|savages]] and communist savages throughout the Cold War, and is still being used by dirt poor countries that [[war|we gave democracy to]]. Ironic, since it was made by the friendly [[Capitalist]] [[Belgium|waffle-humpers]] at Fabrique Nationale who stole most of the design from the Russian SVT-40. Its XBOX HUEG 7.62x51mm round makes an example of every Russian, Arab, nigger, hippie, gook, Argie and protester that gets in its way.

====H&K G3====
Conceived by the God-like Aryan engineers during the closing months of World War 2, then stolen by the Spanish, then stolen back again by the Teutons, the Gerat 3 was designed from the ground up to kill anyone politically left-of-center. Chambered in the massively [[WIN]] 7.62x51mm NATO round, this gun combines advanced mechanical concepts and the crude ability to open up a bush nigger's head like a ripe watermelon at an impressive 600 meters. Used by most nations of the civilized world who wanted a 1.) rifle that wasn't designed by those dirty Belgians and 2.) had it's roots in the Third Reich. HEIL HITLER! 14/88!

====H&K G11====
Three words to sum up this gun? Kraut space magic. This West German commie killer took nearly 30 years to develop, and is quite possibly the most advanced weapon of it's kind. It's got a boxy, futuristic design, a 45 round magazine that is inserted [[wat|parallel]] to the barrel, and fires a proprietary box-like caseless ammunition in a three-round burst at 2100 RPM, and thanks to some advanced mechanisms, all three bullets exit the barrel BEFORE you even feel the recoil! While all of this sounds awesome, and while every /k/ommando and their dog would literally kill for one, it had some serious design problems. For one, the internals were so fucking complicated, that you'd need a clockmaker just to fix a feed-failiure. I mean, [https://www.hkpro.com/attachments/g11open-jpg.276101/ LOOK AT THIS SHIT.] Anyone who's been enlisted can tell you grunts are notorious for being able to break fucking anything, so this shit was basically a disaster waiting to happen. Secondly, the ammunition causes some problems of it's own, with the lack of a case, the propellant is free to foul up the firing chamber, and with sustained firing, it's actually possible for the propellant to go off before it's supposed to! Finally, the damn thing was so expensive that in the 90's, when the berlin wall fell, the West German government decided to rebuild the communist shithole next door than adopt the G11, because it was the cheaper option. After that, H&K Decided to sell the cheaper G36 to the bundeswehr instead. An M-16A2 ripoff that was notorious for melting. Way to go.
Oh, and by the way, this rifle is only a prototype, with less than 1000 units made, all of which are probably rotting in some German Govt. Warehouse, so even if your broke-ass could afford this gun, it would still be pretty much impossible to get. Lol.

====Mauser K98k====
This bolt-action rifle was mass-produced by the [[Nazis]] to waste [[jews]] and it did so rather effectively. It fires [[PWNAGE]] 7.92x57mm Mauser bullets. While it doesn't have the profile of its famous Russian contemporary - the Mosin Nagant - in Amerikkka, it is well famous elsewhere because [[everyone]] has them. It is fairly accurate (which is great for picking off [[jews]] from a balcony) but only carries 5 bullets in the mag. Almost useless for school shootings because they are too slow and will see [[you]] riddled with FBI lead while you reload.

====Mosin-Nagant====

[[File:Mosin troll pwn2.jpg|thumb|Trolling [[IRL]] with the Mosin.]]

Hated by women, children and anyone within 6 metres of it, the "Moist Nugget's" skull-fucking [https://i200.photobucket.com/albums/aa38/davidjblythe/BLAST6a.jpg BOOM] is a great way to clear out n00bs and IRL [[troll]] [[pussies|everyone]] at the range. The Soviets made millions and millions of them during WWII, and as a result you can get them at sporting goods stores in the U.S. for sixty bucks. [[Everyone]] has one, however few can fire them due to the fact that their bolt-action is intended for Popeye-armed [[Russian]] potato farmers. The problem is, the Mosin uses a slightly longer than usual .30-caliber round, so [[Americunts]] often charge their lazers with 7.62x51mm NATO instead of 7.62x54R. Boom! Natural selection continues.

'''Protip:''' The [[Wikipedia:Simo Häyhä|most successful military sniper of all time, "White Death"]], used this gun to rack up over 500 commie kills in the [[Finland|WintAr War]]. He also did this using iron sights... He is [[an hero]] to us all.

====Carcano====
This shitty bolt action rifle was used by fascist [[Italy|guidos]] in da war. It used the 6.5x52mm Mannlicher-Carcano round, a fat ass bottle neck cartridge that has a tendency to jam your gun. It's not very accurate, and the rounded diameter of the bullet causes [[meh|narrow, straight through wounds]]. On the bright side, it does not deform easily and can penetrate without tumbling, so it's great if you're looking to pull that sweet 6 for 1 kill. Also good for [[John F. Kennedy|turning presidents' heads into scrambled chowdah]]. Too bad the only company that still makes the ammunition [[facepalm|adds an extra mm to the length of the bullet, making it even LESS accurate than before]].

====SKS====

The official mantle-piece of mobile home owners everywhere, the SKS is another Soviet gun developed between a tree stump and the AK-47. While not used much by the Soviets themselves, it was mass produced in [[China]] and was widely used by communist /b/tards around the world. Uses a 7.62x39mm cartridge and the Chinese ones are über-cheap. This gun was also the favorite of the [[gooks]] before they laid their dirty mitts on 'Ks. However, because it doesn't [[pwn]] quite liek the AK it has fallen out of service with most squaddies, except the Russian display teams - who use them for ceremonial purposes and [[fags|ass sex]]. And the shitty Russian SKS only has a 10 round internal magazine, you won't find those that common and instead you'll see the common Chinese Type 56 with detachable magazines.

====Sturmgewehr 44====
The worlds first true assault rifle was designed and deployed by the [[nazis|nazis]] in WW2 and was first issued as the MP-43 in 1943. [[Hitler|Hitler]] hated it at first, believing it to be [[ugly|ugly]], Jewish and impractical, [[stupid|and because he had no idea what a useful gun was supposed to do]] since his days in the [[old|first world war]]. After his troops [[rape|convinced]] him it was a good rifle, he used it as propaganda, renaming it the Sturmgewehr (German for "Storm Rifle"). Odd additions to this weapon were created for [[special|special]] purposes, such as a [[Lolwut|curved barrel that could shoot around corners]] and an infrared night vision sight. If [[moar|more]] were produced at an earlier time, the [[Nazis|Germans]] [[lie|may]] have [[awesome|won the war]]. Mikhail Kalashnikov conceived the AK while recovering from getting pwnt by this rifle in WWII.

====Arisaka Type 99====
Despite being a [[Japan|nip]] rifle made by the dirt poor Imperial Armed Forces of Japan, it was actually a [[pretty cool guy|pretty cool gun]]. Because of its long ass barrel, all of the powder burned, making muzzle flash non-existent (sneaky jap is sneaky). It fired the 7.7x58mm Arisaka, which shot at from 1,000 yards was [[epic|the equivalent to being shot point blank by a .45]].

====Daewoo K2====
Kimchi rifle made by [[Gook]]s.

====QBZ-95====
Designed by Duo Yingxian and used by the [[china|largest army in the world]], in reality it is [[fail|fail]]. The fire selector is all the way at the rear and the bullet ejects to the right. So if you hold it with your left hand your chin or nose can get hit by a burning brass. Also, the high sight line makes the front sight snag on shit. The newest model designed by Duo's students, the QBZ 95-1, claims to have fixed everything its predecessor failed at. Improvements range from moving the fire selector on the pistol grip, forward bullet ejection, rails, to lowering the sights. It's greatest improvement is making the gun look less like cheap plastic toys into something from [[Dancing With Smurfs|Avatar]], a.k.a. expensive plastic toys. With the improvements, in theory it has the potential to be the first fully ambidextrous bullpup fielded by a major army that doesn't jam like the F2000. However it has never been used in any major conflict other than [[pwn|pwning]] the occasional [[tibet|Tibetan insurgent]] or [[scientology|Falun Gong cultist]], so time will tell if the "dash one" variant is reliable or not. Canadians can get the semi-auto version that fires the 5.56mm called QBZ-97, assuming they got the first batch of them numbering in the hundreds. All subsequent rifles are confiscated by the RCMP because they are simply converted from full auto. New and legal QBZ-97's are expected to arrive into Canada in spring 2013, although Canadians are still [[fail|limited to 10 round LAR magazines]]. If you live in an igloo you can pay $900 for one
p.s. [[Modern Warfare 3|It does not, I repeat, it DOES NOT have a 3 round burst mode, showing how much research Activision did. EA did it slightly better.]]

====QBU-88====
The QBU-88 is China's first indigenous design bullpup rifle. Designed by Norinco with [[jews|Israeli]] support, it wouldn't be surprising if they end up being used against the [[jews|Israelis]] in [[fail|Syria or Iran]]. It can hit a coke bottle consistently at 600m, and it'll need the accuracy because at that range the only way the 5.8mm intermediate cartridge can instant-kill is if it penetrates the skull, spine, or the heart. Unlike the QBZ-95, China never bothered making a QBU 88-1 improved variant, so soldiers are stuck with the unwieldy buttstock fire selector and right side only ejection. They also can't mount any accessories onto it. Canadians can get the KBU-97A variant which shoots the 5.56mm NATO round. Apparently it shoots better than the Swiss Arms carbines, which makes sense considering it costs '''$3000!'''
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<div id="mw-customcollapsible-content2" class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed"><div style="border:1px solid #CCCCCC; padding:8px">[[File:Cho seung hui.jpg|thumb|Pistols are known for their superior accuracy at close range]]Smaller guns used for the same reason as the rifle, [[pwning]] just on a smaller scale.

====Colt Model 1911A1====
In 1911, John Moses Browning was deep in prayer when Jesus came forth from heaven bearing the Colt Automatic Pistol Model of 1911. And he did giveth the pistol to John, so that America, his chosen people, could kill colored people all over the globe easier than ever before. This emblem of America brought the USA into the 20th Century as the greatest nation on the planet, by killing Germans, Mexicans, Phillipinos, Nicaraguans, and Haetians with.45 of an inch in righteous hot-lead to the motherfucking sternum. 9mm? America doesn't speak metric, faggot!!!! [[shit|'''USA! USA! USA!''']].

Well, that's what most gun-nuts (as in testicles) will say about it. The pistol is a legend in the [[USA]] due to its long service with the military (about 70 years). And given that no one else in the world is allowed to own weapons, this leads it being the most talked about pistol on the webz0rz. Its reputation for accuracy stems mainly for it being bought and riced up for use as IPSC race guns rather than any inherent virtue in the design itself. Truth be known, the original service pistol was just a big, heavy, single-action motherfucker that was no more accurate than any other pistol of the time, and was only notable for being the first pistol chambered in the godly .45 Automatic Colt Pistol round (ACP). But when you spend $2,000 on aftermarket parts, you can do anything.

[[File:Budddwyer3.jpg|thumb|left|Budd Dwyer, noted gun enthusiast, shows off his favorite revolver for the cameras.]]

==== Beretta 92 a.k.a. M9 ====
The 9mm [[Italy|guido]] gun that finally replaced the ancient and frail 1911. 1911fags hate it because it replaced their antiquated relic, SIGfags hate it because it does everything their exetershit does but less expensively, glockfags hate it because it beat out their grenade for the coveted position of the gun used to arm soldiers so they can rape delicious brown girls, and Navy SEALS hate it because it tends to [[pwn|blow up in the face of]] the shooter. This gun [[lie|was only adopted because the USA wanted military bases in Italy]] and [[capitalism|Beretta made them accept their handgun in return]]. No other gun in the history of mankind has caused so much drama among gunfags. The Beretta is also a great way to behead yourself! Just make sure the slide is at neck level and pull the trigger!

==== Glock ====
R' da bloods movin' in awn 'yo crip territry and ya'll need a piece to pop 'dem niggaz wif? Reach for 'yo [[Cock|glock]] nigga! Created by [[Josef Fritzl|Austrian]] grenade and curtains manufacturer [[Gaston|Gaston Glock]], the Glock was widely adopted by niggers the world over for its ease of use while aiming sideways. Glocks are now used as much by wannabe badboy cops as they are niggers. Glocks, being standard issue to cops, niggers and mafiosi, are therefore owned by [[everyone]]. [[Cho|The Blazn Azn]] used one at his time at VTech! Further testament to its quality is Adam Lanza choosing one in 10mm. Glock Perfection indeed.

==== Springfield XD ====

The anti-Glock, fixing everything the glock fails at; like exploding when shot. Actually a [[Nazi|Croatian]] pistol called the "HS2000", the American company Springfield Armory just [[capitalism|stole the design]] and called it the "XD". A lot of [[Counter-strike]] and [[Call of Duty 4]] [[13 year old boys|players]] love this gun, right after the Desert Eagle, because the "XD" looks like an [[emoticon]]. This gun is designed to function even with the muzzle pressed against a flat surface, such as someone's back.

====S&W Model 29====
[[File:Model29.JPG|thumb|Beautiful]] ''[[You]]’ve got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well do ya, punk?''

You're going to need much, much more than luck when you stand up to this cannon. The S&W Model 29 .44 Magnum revolver is the closest you can get to an overkill without being impractical. This gun kicks like a mule, but has the power to dismember limbs, and is almost guaranteed to be a one-shot-kill anywhere in the torso. You have a better chance of escaping [[Chris Hansen]] at a bait-house than surviving this son-of-a-bitch. Unlike the Desert Eagle, it is still reasonable in terms of size, unless you choose to buy a fucking 12" barrel because you are too big of a pussy to handle the kick.

====FN Five-seveN====
Admired by [[Libertarian]]s and [[spics]] for its ability to pierce body armor and kill cops. The FN Five-seveN (LOL SO CLEVER THEY MADE THE F AND THE N IN [[caps lock|CAPS]]) is used in a lot of animes and video games, so of course all school shooters pick this up for the job, because, as we know, most school shooters are actually [[13 year old boys]] who have been [[fapping]] to too much violent [[hentai]]. However, anyone who is on the path to [[an hero|enlightenment]] will need to save up his allowance for a long time or use mommy and daddy's credit card, as the Five-seveN and its silly 5.7x28mm proprietary cartridge are quite expensive, but will worth the money if you can afford one.

====Hi-Point C9====
A 9mm pistol that runs about $120 brand new. [[Truth|It does the exact same thing as $700 pistols]]. Post a picture of one in any weapons related area on the internet and watch the sparks fly. A favorite of black person and [[Mexico|Mexicans]]. They have a [[lifetime]] warranty (Which is in practice a Week At most before the Owner gets killed by a Nigger), but [[headshot|it's hard to make a claim with the slide sticking out of your fucking forehead.]]

====Walther P22====
Originally designed as a target pistol in weak .22LR, the P22 found a new home in the hands of [[Cho|The Blazn Azn]]. He dual-wielded it with a Glock in order to achieve the highest score in [[American]] history! Walther was of course very pleased by this, and instantly issued a statement commemorating the occasion.

====Sig Mosquito====
Another target pistol chambered for .22LR that found a new notoriety in the hands of [[The Finnisher]]. It should be noted that while Cho used both a 9mm Glock and a .22 pistol, PEA only used a single .22 pistol. This is a good explanation for why he achieved such a low score. Sig Sauer refused to issue a statement, since they were afraid crazy [[Finland|Finns]] would riot outside of their stores after the ensuing sales boom caused stocks of the Mosquito to run dry.

====The Desert Eagle (Deagle)====
[[File:Barack Obama with golden handgun.jpg|thumb|[[Niggers]] love the Deagle brand Deagle.]]
The Desert Eagle is classified as a handgun, despite being bigger than most SMGs. It is a terrible, overrated, piece of shit that jams more often than New York City traffic. You can create lulz by going to a DE forum and saying the .357 and .44 are fired from more practical-sized guns like revolvers. Weapon of choice for many retards, such as [[Jace Connors]].

The Desert Eagle got notoriety in the U.S. when niggers got their hands on it. Unfortunately, they thought they were holding their Glocks sideways and when they pulled the trigger, they killed themselves from the impact on their head. This is the reason Desert eagles are now made in [[America| America]] instead of Israel, [[Fact| because killing brown people is America's job.]] If you fire the Deagle with only one hand, you'll break your wrist from the recoil of the .50 bullet, and then, just like with the Uzi, you'll never [[fap]] again. A fun fact about the Deagle is that while it is in just about every video game ever, no real military or police force has ever adopted it. This is likely due to the fact that it doesn't fucking fire properly. You would be playing Russian Roulette every time you tried to kill yourself with a Deagle,[[fail| seeing as how it has about a 1 in 6 chance of firing.]]

==== Smith & Wesson Model 500 ====

[[File:50calrevolver.jpg|thumb|left|This can kill a bear... and this is the snub-nose version.]]

Oh yeah, make the niggers and spics bow down to you with this fucking .50 caliber revolver! This bad boy does everything that the Deagle should have. It can make bears shit themselves, implant holes bigger than [[goatse]] in people, and tear apart a concrete block like a block of cheese. Tired of playing with those baby toys like the .44 and .357? Just cough up $1,000 and fire away, if you can without breaking your wrists and smashing your face in, which you can't, you pussy.

==== Colt Peacemaker ====

Officially the '''Single Action Army'''. Despite being made obsolete literally [[at least 100 years ago]], it's more popular than ever thanks to pretend [[cowboy]]s and [[metal gear solid]]fags. It has a distinguished history of genociding filthy red savages, mexicans, the irish, chinese laborers, [[philippines|filipinos]], freed blackies, and [[Red Dead Redemption|John Marston]].

====QSZ-92====
Another Chinese weapon only available in Canada renamed as "CF-98", it fires just like any other modern 9mm, it handles just like any other modern 9mm, it is just as (un)reliable as any other modern 9mm, and it costs as much as any other modern 9mm ($500). Unless you've got a hard-on for modern Chinese weapons, Americans are not missing out on much.

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Automatics firing pistol ammo used by the [[police|popo]] so they can brutalize niggers without penetrating through walls and killing [[white|innocents]].

====HK MP5 - spray 'n pray====

[[File:Cream Has Three Guns by bendilin.jpg|thumb|The ultimate SMG, and favorite of [[furry]] sex symbols.]]

So you decided to use one of these guns on this page to create a [[lulz|lulz]] fest at your local school, mall, and/or place of employment, and now you're wondering what's the fuzz is going to be thrown at you when you get to the [[Vtech|final level of the game]]. Five out of five times, when you've got yourself a good score going and you live in an urban area, the swat bunnies will be plugging your socially mis-adjusted body with the HK MP5. Don't despair, the HK MP5 is the perfect firearm to get mowed down by on national TV. It was also the first closed bolt submachine gun with fine [[Hitler|Nazi]] precision pedigree, so you can be assured that you are going out in style. The 9mm ammunition means that you won't die too quickly so you can have that dramatic last stand, just like in ''Scarface''! Bonus points if you get killed by a [[Mexican|beaner]] wearing shades, from behind, with a shotgun while you're firing your weapon of choice dramatically in the air, as the cops riddle your body with US government lead.

==== Uzi (Moar like JEWzi, [[no|amirite?]])====
[[File:Nazi with uzi.jpeg|thumb|left|Even [[Nazi]]s love [[Israeli]] weapons manufacturers!]]
The Uzi (Jewspeak: ?????) was invented solely to rape sand nigger babies. It's based on the Czechoslovakian series 23 to 26 submachine guns, and is further proof that Jews steal everything, [[amirite?]]. Every American should have two. You have two hands, after all, right? [[lolwut|Ironically]], it's the preferred weapon of neo-[[Nazis]], skinheads and Tommy Vershitty (too bad Carl Johnson couldn't buy some in his [[USA|country]]. Shooting this thing one-handed, though it may look cool, will either break your wrist (no more [[fapping]]) or turn you into [[an hero]] unless you're Bruce Willis...or Carl Johnson, who can hold two fuckin' Sawn-offs and can still walk away and [[fap]] afterwords. Lucky Bastard. Uzis, thus, look cool, but aren't as cool as a frickin' AK-47. Chambered in 9mm but having less power than MP5's, that explains why the fuck their magazines are loaded with 32 rounds and not 30. Jews just can't count right.

==== MP40 ====
Known as the Maschinen Pistole 1940 to NeoNazis, this gun is favored by them because they just happened to be used by the original Nazis (though they automatically failed hard against Russian weaponry). This is as close as you can get to being Michael J. Fox with a pistol because it is semi-automatic.

==== PPSH-41 ====
[[File:Ppshchair.jpg|thumb|The PPSh-41 even makes a great chair when you [[lazy|need to sit]]!]]
The [[Russian]]-made Papa Sha (Also known as a bullethose for it's ridiculously high [[awesome|rate of fire]] (900 rounds per minute)). Firing the small, but powerful 7.62x25mm Tokarev round, this thing has killed more [[nazis]] and [[americans]] than [[epic|the showers at Auschwitz have killed Jews]]. Because the USSR loved to share with anyone who [[communists|agrees with them]], many [[gooks]] and Arab have gotten their filthy hands on these fine weapons and used them on [[America|foreign invaders]]. Even today, the PPSh-41 is used by [[terrorists]] in the middle east to fight decadent westerners. During WW2, entire platoons would be equipped with this [[rapist|firearm]], giving them [[rape|unparalleled close combat effectiveness]].

====Tec-9====
The Tec-9 an unbelievably shite one-handed SMG made famous by [[GTA|Carl Johnson]] and the [[Columbine]] gays. It was made by Intratec 'til they went bust and so now only exists as cheap [[gook]] copies or as museum pieces. Somehow shooting it one-handed doesn't break your wrist, so this is the gun of choice for [[fap]]stars. It fires standard 9mm pistol rounds just like every other fucking gun out there. School shootings with this thang will make the media shit bricks and come out with [[shit]] like "[[Columbine]] REVISITED!" and "School Shootings - A PHENOMENON?!". That means it's perfect for the job; after all, what could be more satisfying to the average [[an hero]] than the thought of causing a media stir because of the gun they used, and maybe getting [[hippies|Michael Moore]] to ban the sale of its ammo?

====Mac 10====
The Mac 10 is basically a bootleg Mini Uzi made with an open bolt, so niggers and rednecks could bubbarig their guns in their garage and make it fire full auto. The Mac 11 is a version in .380 ACP that sucks even worse.

====Thompson SMG====
[[File:Churchill_Thompson_SMG.gif|200px|thumb|left|Making the world safe for Democracy since 1921]]
First and foremost, the Thompson is a submachine gun [[Fail|NOT A RIFLE, FAGGOTS]]. Most commonly used by [[Old people|WW2 Veterans]] and greasy [[Guido|Italians]]. It's one of the original SMGs and was invented by John T. Thompson under the close supervision of God [[At least 100]] years ago. It is vastly superior to other guns of the time because it was made in [[USA|Good 'Ole US of A]]. It fires .45 ACP pistol rounds, which are fucking huge, and jizzes them out at a fire rate of [[Over 9000]] rpm, which is perfect for shooting up your high school. It unfortunately does not make a loud noise like the M14, but it does make a lovely clicking sound as it spits an unending stream of lead at any Jap on the beach. It will take any one of six magazines, including a humble 20 round stick to the batshit insane 100 round drum. Like the AK, you'd have to shit in the chamber to make this thing jam. It was originally marketed to [[rednecks]] to shoot rabbits, deer, [[niggers]], and other [[You|undesirables]]. It was later adopted by law enforcement, the US Army, and the mafia to shoot [[Nazis]], [[Japs]], more Niggers, [[Jews]], each other, and [[An hero|Themselves]]. Notable people who have used it are greaseball mobsters, G-Men, and [[Ireland|Cops]]. [[Truth|Firing this gun from the hip will make you look like an absolute badass and it's a great idea.]]

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<div id="mw-customcollapsible-content4" class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed"><div style="border:1px solid #CCCCCC; padding:8px">The uber cool guns for [[pwning]] on the biggest scale.

==== LMGs (Light machine guns)====
These are autos you can carry around, like the M240, M249 SAW, MG3, M60, BAR, RPD, RPK, MG34, M1919 and BREN. They can clear a room of students faster than yelling "[[Maury|YOU ARE THE FATHER!]]" at an NAACP meeting - plus they look teh awesome. They fire rifle-sized bullets so you don't need no high-capacity assault clips for your Bushmaster that will likely jam.

====Heavy Stuff====
Think Maxim, Vickers, M2, MG42 and DshK. These will gleefully slice 'n' dice your foes to [[over 9000]] pieces, with big bullets. These are teh awesome, more so than LMGs, just because they pwn so well. Only [[Over 9000]] rounds from a .50-cal can even scratch a [[long cat]]. However, against ordinary fools, you will [[win]]. Niggers can't get their chicken grease mitts on these 'coz they're even more expensive than [[put shoe on head|Nike kicks]]!.

Don't even bother tooling one of these up for a school shooting, though; it weighs too damn much. Just leave it on a Hummer (for drive-bys) or on a tripod (for long ranged spraying) and let rip. Hurrah!

====Gatling Guns====
[[File:Korean War.gif|thumb|[[A Cat Is Fine Too|A gat is fine too]]]]
So you want a school shooting with a difference? A 6-barrel XM214 Gatling gun can fire [[over 9000|10,000]] rounds a minute, at 3750 fps. Bye bye school, [[alpha male|jocks]], [[basement dweller|nerds]], [[12 year old girls|whores]], and [[emos]].

The Gatling gun comes in a variety of different flavors, not unlike [[slurpee]]s, or condoms. Starting with the biggest, baddest motherfucker of all, the GAU-8 Avenger, a 30mm precision engineered lead-breathing dragon that has an A-10 Warthog attack aircraft mounted on top of it. This monster fires [[OMG|Depleted Uranium rounds the size of wine bottles]] meant for decimating rusted [[russian|ruskie]] armor and [[arab|sand nigger]] caves. It puts out over 4 tons of recoil force and the gun itself weighs 620lbs, but once you add n the magazine and the hydraulics system required to fire it, you're looking at over 4000lbs, then you'll need almost 2000lbs of ammo for about 15 seconds of [[fap|blissful carnage]]. For best results, mount it on your bicycle.

A somewhat smaller version is the 6-barrel M61 Vulcan, capable of firing 20mm [[dildos|rounds]] at [[over 9000|over 6000]] rounds per minute that will blast Ruskie jets out of the sky when all the missiles are used up. Also used for [[blowjob|blowing]] [[penis|missiles]] out of the sky when mounted to ships and [[web 2.0|controlled by robots]] as the CIWS weapon system. The M196 is a 3-barrel version mounted on AH-1 Cobra's used for [[anal|buttplugging]] [[terrorists]] at close range.

[[shit nobody cares about|A 'smaller' Gatling gun gaining popularity as a mobile vehicle mounted system]] is the 3 barrel, .50 caliber GAU-19 GECAL ('jekyll'). It hits as hard as an M2 .50 cal heavy machine gun but has a rate of fire 4 times faster. This allows you to rack up points nearly as fast as a panty-waste M134 but with the added benefit of doing it even when their hiding behind three concrete walls and the [[Nuke#World_War_II|nuke proof desks]] at your local school house.

Smaller still, is the General Electric M134, known commonly as the "Minigun." This 7.62mm beast was first used in the skies over [[Vietnam]] to spread [[aids|freedom and democracy]] to the [[azn|gooks]], either as a door gun on the UH-1 Huey (no blackhawks in Vietnam dumbass), or as a [[goatse|offensive weapon]] on the [[homosexual|versatile]], AH-6 "[[shota|Little]] [[cock|Bird]]". Made most famous in Terminator 2 when the [[arnold|governator]] laid the smack down on some [[leftard|Californian]] [[the man|police]] when they tried to take away his [[god]] given right to carry around large caliber assault weaponry. The [[pwn|ownage]] was so great, they appointed him their supreme ruler.

The smallest yet conceived was the 6-barrel XM214 5.56 Gatling gun. It fired literally [[over 9000]] rounds per minute. But it offered no practicality over the M134 and little/no advantage in weight. Even this model put out more than 200lbs of recoil force, weighed over 30lbs, and required at least 100lbs in backup equipment, such as batteries and large cases of ammo, which is needless to say, more than your limp wristed faggoty ass can handle. So forget your dreams of recreating the scene in Predator unless you want to [[an hero]] yourself in possibly the most ridiculous fashion possible. On second thought [[DO IT FAGGOT]].

But if you want to kick it old school, look no further than the original Gatling gun, [[shit nobody cares about|invented by Dr. Richard Jordan Gatling]] [[at least 100 years ago]], when Murka was [[scissoring|waging war]] within her own borders. This [[old]] [[milf|warhorse]] didn't have your fancy [[vibrator|electric drive motors]]. No, you put good ole' fashion elbow grease into this antique, as you had to [[fap|hand-crank]] the thing to [[cum|shoot it]]. If you can find enough of the obsolete .58 caliber rimfire cartridges to fill the hopper of this [[old]]-timer, you can waste your school just like your great-great-great-great-great-granddaddy did to the jiggaboos who refused to work his fields.

</div></div>
<div id="mw-customcollapsible-content5" class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed"><div style="border:1px solid #CCCCCC; padding:8px">A list of more guns on a scale of [[pwning]] it makes the other guns look [[shit]]

====Big Game Rifles====
Not classed as ordinary rifles, coz they're so fucking huge. Best used to put holes in elephant's skulls, but if you want to terrorize the local [[niggers]] just load a .60 or .577 up and point it at 'em. Just don't fire it lying down (broken collar bone) or standing up (broken shoulder). Breaking your bones while pwning [[niggers]] will [[fail]] you, minussing your score by [[over 9000]] points. Alternately, use them against other snipers, who will be using .50 BMG, 7.62mm, or, if they're real [[fap|wankers]], 5.56mm.

====Shotgun====
Use this bad boy to really fuck up someone's day. Sprays a lot of buckshot everywhere which means you can pwn a whole bunch of people or destroy one person at extremely close range. Very popular with hunters and cops and comes in many flavors like the pussy fuck .410 , the 12 gauge and the PWNAGE 4 Gauge Magnum that will fucking pwn the fuck out of any sandnigger you meet.

*Buckshot (medium sized pellets, good for everything)
*Birdshot (lots of tiny pellets good for small agile targets like birds or rabbits)
*Slugs (one massive projectile good for pwning just about anything that gets in your way)

Alternatively: 
1. Saw stock off 
2. Shorten the barrel(s) to about 11 inches. 
3. Fire one handed. 
4. ???? 
5. PROFIT!! 
 
'''Notable Shotguns:'''
:*Ithaca Model 37
Arguably the first modern shotgun.
 
:*Double Barrel
As if one wasn't enough, now you have double the pwnage. Arguably the best shotgun to use for sawing off, as it can be reduced much shorter than pump-action shotguns, maintain the internal ballistics, and has a higher capacity than the single barrel. 
Unless you're [[Randy Robert Stair]] you really can't fuck up going with one of these.
 
:*Remington 870
The most common pump-action shotgun in the world. Everybody in [[Murka]] and [[Canada]] owns at least three of these.
 
:*AA-12
Fully automatic. What else do you need to know?
 
:*12 gauge combat shotgun with Flachette rounds.
Have a problem with your enemies wearing kevlar style body armour? Well these little gifts from Heaven were designed during Vietnam just for that. Meaning little arrow in French, Flachettes are small javelin shaped projectiles with vaned tails for a stable flight. It's pretty much a war crime to use these pretty babies during battle in the modern age because of how hard they are to find in a human body because of their small size but that hasn't stopped the police from pumping them into anyone that says boo to them. 

Fat cops fear the shotgun especially, since a 12 gauge slug reliably penetrates the Level IIIa body armor that they wear. They never expect getting owned in the face. Shotguns are also more effective if you're [[Gears of War|host]] or [[Bruce Campbell]] and are fighting [[Doom|demons]] in the past for some fucked up demon book.

[[Image:1m82111.jpg|thumb|center|400px]]

==== The Barrett M82 Sniper Rifle ====

Known as the M107 to military types like [[United States Marine Corps|Uncle Sam's Misguided Children]] and is probably one of the best [[penis]] upgrades you can buy for under [[money|$13,000]]. Trust me, you show up on the ranges with this bad boy, no one will ever question your size again. 
If you have a problem looking your [[Muslim |terrorist]] in the face or want them to be sitting down to dinner and have their head suddenly explode with no one ever hearing the weapon's report, with an effective range of 1,800 meters, or just over a mile and using a .50 BMG round, let me tell you stud - this is definitely the toy for you. As this weapon was originally designed for Anti-Material use meaning it was meant to be used to disable vehicles like trucks by ripping a hole the size of your fist through its engine, when used as an anti-personnel weapon, it literally will turn a human being into a puddle. 

[[File:Kill it with fire scorpio.gif|thumb|left|[[Kill it with fire|Kill your enemies with fire]]]]

====[[KILL IT WITH FIRE|Flamethrower]]====
[[File:Stupiddemotivator.jpg|thumb|The memorial for Jamal and his friends is now '''{{archive|DsHv0|on MySpace}}''' ]]
The closest you can actually come to playing Satan. Strap on 2 scuba tanks full of napalm and rain fiery death on [[gooks]]. Just be careful not to use it on a really windy day or you'll involuntarily become [[an hero]]. Much to the ire of [[leftards]], you can legally own or build one. [https://www.cracked.com/article_17016_7-items-you-wont-believe-are-actually-legal.html Srsly.] The best part of this weapon is that you can take out a whole platoon in one shot, however if someone shoots the tank, prepare to suffer one of the most worst and painful deaths imaginable.

====Grenade Launcher====
This is a gun that shoots 25mm or 40mm grenades. Boom! The M-79 is a favorite from 'Nam, perfect for ruining [[Gooks]]. Like a smaller Bazooka, basically. Watch out, though, it's illegal in California. Oh wait, so is everything else. Except [[weed]]. The M203 and M320 improve on the M79 by replacing the stock with [[Win|a functional assault rifle]]. Now you can have the best of both worlds for just a few pounds more!
The Heckler & Koch GMG combines the raw power of [[Rape|a 40mm grenade launcher]] with the fully-automatic convenience of a belt-fed machine gun. While it has a greater maximum range and [[Over 9000|rate of fire]] than the M79, its recoil and weight make it [[Fail|less than ideal]] for on-the-go use unless mounted to a vehicle.

====[[C-note|Bazooka]]====
Will ruin everything from [[goth]]s to [[teenager]]s to the entire local [[mall]] in a glorious explosion of [[win]]. A favorite of [[Counter-Strike]] O.G.s. They don't like dat shit one-two bit. Only refers to the bazooka itself, the rest are called recoiless rifles, asshole.

====RPG-7====
[[File:Rpg-ww3.gif|thumb|ALLAHU AKBARRRRRRRR!!]]
Another great well-known arsenal rocket launcher. Beloved to death by the Arabs. This damn ruski-made launcher can blow shit up like military tanks instantaneously as well as helicopters or towers. Useful for blowing up [[Furry|furry conventions]] or any large place populated. Even if someone wears Body-armor or any armor protection they'll be [[pwned|PWNEDDD!]]. Shooting up schools with ARs and SMGs became really common and somewhat cliché, but with RPG-7 don't worry; use the RPG-7 to obliterate the entire school. It's ideal to fire it at a large group of people. [[Truth|Just make sure you have enough ammo to eliminate everything and then you will become untouchable like a badass.]]

====[[Quake|Railgun]]====
This does happen to exist IRL as it is being experimented with by the Navy as the new anti-warshit gun. It uses two electrostatic field creating rails and shoves a huge-ass block of metal at [[over 9000]] times the speed of sound with a range limit of over 9000 miles away. Naturally this can be the next ultimate in pwning power, but the fields are so strong that when the bullet goes through, it breaks itself apart and requires a month of charging the electricity needed. Alternatively, you could build a Coilgun, which only hit as hard as an arrow, but hey, its legal!

====[[Doom 3|Duct Tape]]====
With duct tape, you can strap two guns together, like a shotgun and a machine gun. However, with duct tape you can also make A FUCKING MINIGUN WITH A FLAMETHROWER AND FIVE MACHINE GUNS AND SHOTGUNS on it (though you will have to operate each weapon manually, something your [[gay|effete]] wrists are probably not meant to handle). Duct Tape is something not to be fucked with but if you happened to have purchased a cheaper mesh, don't expect anyone to be afraid of your death contraption when it's in pieces all over the ground.

====[[Sebastian Bosse|Flintlocks]], Caplocks, Matchlocks, Wheel-locks====
These are the types of firearms that existed from 1337 AD until the days of the wild west. They were inaccurate as fuck, had extreme recoil, and you only got one shot until you have to spend 2 minutes reloading. Impossible to hit an apple from a distance of 10 feet. If it's raining, you have a 99.9% chance of misfire. Almost nobody uses these types of guns in the modern age due to their primitive and inaccurate nature. However, [[Sebastian Bosse]] is notable for trying to go for the [[High Score]] with some of these types of guns.

</div></div>
<div id="mw-customcollapsible-content6" class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed"><div style="border:1px solid #CCCCCC; padding:8px">[[File:Gun_-_Choose_Your_Bullet.jpg|1000px|center]]
Gun food

==== .22 LR ====
[[.22 LR]] for more information

Meant to be a training round for n00bs or to kill small animals for the lulz, so it's the cheapest and most common firearm round ever. Can be used from a snub nose revolver (which might as well be a pellet gun) to a rifle. NOTE: <s>Will not kill anyone because it sucks.</s> The problem with the .22 LR or .22 Magnum rounds are they are what is known as a commitment round, which means if you aren't commited to killing you target by firing at lethal areas like the head or heart then you might as well be standing there with your dick in your hand because as the .22 is not known for its stopping power, the person you're firing at probably won't even know that they were hit. 
If you have a .22 LR or .22 Magnum and aren't willing to kill, you'd be better off using your weapon as a bludgeon to beat the shit out of your attacker then even trying to stop them by firing at nonlethal areas. 

==== .25 ACP ====
Comes from a time when a man who was 5'6" tall was considered a giant and getting a staph infection was a death sentence. This puny little round is even less powerful than the ubiquitous .22 LR. It's used in [[tiny penis|pocket sized handguns]] by people who don't like hard recoil, such as faggots, women, and [[Midget|Oompa Loompas]] guarding Wonka's [[ass|chocolate factory]]. Unless you have plans of getting in close to your target and sticking the weapon in their gut or sneaking up behind them and going John Wilkes Booth with a shot to the base of the skull keep it in your [[girlfriend]]s panties where it is popularly known as a [[pussy|snatch]] gun because it was a favorite of hookers in the old west who would hide them in their garters which led men to think that they were hiding them up inside their vaginas when they were reaching up under their dresses to pull them out when trouble started.

==== .32 ACP ====
The bastard child of the Colt cartridges. Like the .25 ACP, it's for pocket pistols. Also is the minimum sized round for submachine guns. Doesn't wreck up a whole lot of shit, but it gets the job done.

==== .380 ACP ====

Introduced in 1908 by Colt because they knew the .32 ACP was an anemic piece of shit suitable for use only by limp-wristed Europeans, the .380 replaces the 7.65mm bullet with a 9mm bullet and removes the archaic rim for reliable feeding in magazines.

==== 9mm Makarov ====

[[Cold War]]-era pistol cartridge used by the Russians and their hostage nations so that in the event of war with NATO, the inevitably victorious West couldn't use their ammo in their guns. Da, take zat Americanski!

==== 9mm Luger ====

The most widespread pistol cartridge in the world, used by militaries, police, niggers, school shooters, assassins, serial killers, Nazis, and suicide victims alike. The only people who don't use 9mm are rednecks, who think a .1" increase in caliber is somehow better, and American police, who use the explosion-causing .40 S&W.

==== .40 S&W ====

A ridiculously overpressure pistol round with a tendency to blow up your gun. It was created to appease dumb American cops who thought 9mm was too weak but wanted more capacity than the giant old ass .45 . TL;DR it's a solution to a problem no one ever had except for rednecks who won't use anything that doesn't start with a 4.

==== .45 ACP ====

A lot bigger, and more powerful, than almost every other practical semi-auto handgun round. Nobody but 1911fags use this bullet, for the obvious reason of compensating for their [[My Tiny Dick|tiny penises.]]

==== .45 GAP ====

Probably the most pathetic round in existence. It was designed by Glock to be a shorter version of .45 ACP to be used in compact pistols. Despite .45 ACP being very well established in the US for over 100 years, Glock banked on their idiotic fanbase (known as [[fellatio|Glocksuckers]]) to buy this round but it was too [[fail]], even by their trailer-dwelling standards.

==== .357 SIG ====

Pretty much the same situation as the .45 GAP. SIG wanted to make a round to bridge the microscopic gap between 9mm Luger and .40 S&W so they took the .40 case and necked the bullet down to 9mm. Unlike Glocktards, SIGfuckers are retarded enough to actually keep buying this shit enough to [[Terri Schiavo|keep it around]].

====10mm Auto====
[[File:Asacoonkilla.jpg|thumb|[[PROTIP]]: If your movie sucks, then just [[Quentin Tarantino|add a bunch of guns]] and your movie will be a guaranteed hit, at least in [[America]].]]
Ownage in the [[masturbation|palm of your hand]]. Packing the power of a .357 into a frame the size of a .45 with the ammo capacity of a 9mm, the 10mm Auto was released to much fanfare of it's awesomeness. Well, no it wasn't. Actually, [[nobody cares|nobody cared]].

The [[Party Van|FBI]] adopted it briefly before crying that the recoil hurt their wrists, which were sore after they got done 'researching' all those [[Chris Hanson|CP websites]]. Smith & Wesson obliged by creating the .40S&W, which is believed to stand for either "Smith & Wesson", "Shitty & Weak" or the widely accepted "Shoop & Woop".

==== .38 Special ====
Small center fire casing mostly used in revolvers. They are complete shit. [[Srsly]], no one but fat fuck crazy obsessed Beatles fans would use it. Hence the name "[[Retarded|Special]]". It sucks so hard the police actually have a policy against issuing them. They launch the slowest bullets in existence, have [[You|low pressure and penetration]], and they don't expand, even if it's a hollow point. If you get in a dual and go up against someone, armed with a .38, consider yourself [[An hero|an heroed]].

====.357 Magnum - BOOM! [[Headshot]]====
[[File:IHero.jpg|thumb|[[An Hero|iHero]]]]
Once you have returned home from killing the entire [[Vietnam|Viet Kong]] army, you have become the Pennsylvania state treasurer. You receive bribes and give your friends exclusive million dollar contracts as well as receiving $300,000 kickbacks. When you fuck it up and get convicted; facing 55 years imprisonment, you end it all by [[Budd Dwyer|blowing your brains out with this baby in front of a live televised press conference.]]
If you want to dramatically kill some one, make sure to shoot him in the lungs closer to the arm to let him live at least a few seconds more (according to Wikipedia you feel like "struck by lightning" when shot at), then let him crawl a little, then shoot him in the heart.

==== .44 Magnum ====
The .44 caliber is a classic pwner from the 19th century. Combine it with magnum (whatever the fuck that is) and you get the .44 Magnum, which is like the .357 on steroids. Fun to blow up watermelons with and make black people [[BAW|cry]]. Used by rednecks, police officers, and assassins alike.

==== 5.56x45mm ====
Official rifle cartridge of NATO, along with the much more awesome 7.62x51mm which sadly is only used by snipers and medium machine guns. The M193, the original loading of this round, maimed gooks so bad in 'Nam that those pussy Europeans refused to use it when they adopted the 5.56 as standard issue because it was too "inhumane". Instead, they chose the M855 which is designed to penetrate through steel helmets that Arabs, niggers, and civilians don't wear. It will still fuck shit up but needs to travel though about 2 feet of tissue to do so past a [[Gay|supersoaker's]] range, and thus is far better suited for warfare against the [[Americunts]] who made teh bullet.

==== 5.8x42mm ====
A bullet that only China uses. Adpoted so if Russia or America spreads their freedom and democracy there, they can't steal their bullets without stealing their guns. Standard 5.8mm DBP87 does even less damage than the standard 5.56mm against unarmored targets. However, has better ballistic trajectory than the 5.56mm, and designed specifically to defeat American body armor if nothing else. Proof that China is un-American.

==== 7.62x39mm ====
Used in the AK-47 and all its derivatives. This bad boy does everything the 5.56 should be doing, like busting through soft cover and killing people. Unfortunately, the gay disease spread to the Soviets in 1974, when they [[circumcision|replaced the 7.62]] in service with the 5.45x39mm which sucks worse than 5.56. Even Comrade Kalashnikov said it sucks.

==== 7.62x54mmR ====
A Russian mainstay [[Over 100 years ago|since the 19th century]], the 7.62x54R is the badass grandpa used by Russians before they were B movie villains. Used in several variations of the Mosin-Nagant (Moist Nugget), the Winchester M1895 (Levernugget), the SVT-40 (Autonugget), and the SVD "Dragunov" (Snipernugget) of FPS fame you can never buy because Bill Clinton Hates you.

==== 7.62x51mm NATO ====
Also called the .308 Winchester by rednecks, this is the rifle cartridge soldiers should be using if they actually want to win a war. WARNING: shooting this round will make you cream your pants.

==== .308 Winchester ====
The classic go to for [[hunting|hunters]]. Great for turning deers into a nice wall mount. Slowly being phased out by 6.5 creedmoor or that what those 6.5 faggots want you to think.

==== 6.5 Creedmoor ====

Heralded as the killer of the classic .308 with claims it was "more accurate and more stopping power" which it failed miserably at as it's more or less the same shit.

==== .30-06 Springfield ====
If you like the 7.62x51mm, well this is just [[black dick|12 more mm]] of that. Same bullet, longer cartridge because crummy wartime gunpowder. Your great grandpappy put this in his gerund to punctuate grammar nazis and nip nips. Also, for some bullshit reason they named the round after the year it was invented (1906).

==== .50 BMG ====

Is an enemy of democracy being shielded by his village? Break out this motherfucker. The .50 Big Motherfucking Gun was designed to bust through brick and steel, which is overkill because civilians only wear wool at most. Download the AMERICA FUCK YEAH!! [[bullshit|DLC]] to upgrade your ammo to the Raufoss Mk 211, which fucking explodes inside your enemies.
</div></div>

==The [[NRA]]==

[[File:Gunnuts.jpg|thumb|120px|[[Typical]] [[NRA]] [[Redneck|member]].]]

A gun industry lobby organization formed in 1871 along with the [[KKK]], the '''NRA''' was established to give [[Republican|White racists]], gun-loving soccer moms and hungover rednecks the ability to focus their [[God]]-given talents on something much more important: shooting homosexuals, Muslims, Blacks and Scientists. The most noted savior of the NRA was Charlton Heston, who proved that the best reason for us to have guns is to defend ourselves from our government. This group holds that guns are good, and totally ignores studies done by [[Michael Moore|bleeding-heart pseudosciences]] like "psychology," "sociology," and "political science". The NRA is always doing its duty saving us from the tyrannical grip of people who support gun control - like that godawful boring [[Noam Chomsky]]. Oddly enough, many [[liberals]] have begun to '''{{archive|pD7N1|join the ranks of the NRA}}''', for fear that gun control may render them defenseless against their crazy-ass [[redneck]] neighbors. Clearly, the best protection against dangerous nuts with guns is to give everyone guns and hope for the best.

==Gun vs. Sword==

[[File:Indianaowns.gif|thumb|Gun > sword]]

[[File:Swordvsgun.gif|thumb|This [[Original Content|completely original]] animu agrees.]]
Guns have replaced the archaic simpleton sword as the killing device of choice for a good many reasons, not least of which is the gun's [[awesome|superiority over hand-to-hand weapons]]. Some fanboys are in a state of denial about this.

*''Myth'': Swords are more honorable. Case in point: [[Ninja|ninja]]s and samurai, [[Jedi]] and other knights used swords.
**'''FACT''': Anyone claiming the above is obviously a cultureless, fucking [[Wapanese]] and needs to commit [[Hara kiri]], die of [[AIDS]] or become [[an hero]]. Ninjas were fags anyway, and the samurai EXTENSIVELY used guns. Jedi are fucking imaginary anyway.
*''Myth'': You can block bullets with a sword if you are skilled enough.
**'''FACT''': You can possibly (unlikely) block bullets with your sword but the bullet will shatter and then spread out into little pieces hitting eveything behind the sword, like say, the person using the sword. Or, if the gun is a shotgun, break the sword in half and send the large sharp upper half into the user's body. Plus, the pellets will probably spread around the sword. Besides, virtually all FMJ bullets will pierce the sword and go on to hit you. That's all while assuming you CAN react to a 700-800 m/s fast bullet fired from a rifle, and also that your hand is fast enough to block 4-8 bullets coming from an automatic rifle at you every second...
*''Myth'': You don't have to reload a sword, therefore you can use it forever.
**'''FACT''': You must constantly wipe your sword clean of blood and sharpen it, otherwise it will chip and [[old|rust away]], and then you will have to beg [[your mom]] for money so you can buy another shitty [[weaboo]] sword off of the internet.
*''Myth'': Guns are cowardly because you can kill people from a distance; swords take real skill to use.
**'''FACT''': You will not be complaining about a gun's skill level when you have a bullet in your chest or head. Guns can kill at long range, but hitting the thing takes skill.
*''Myth'': You can run up to a guy with a gun real fast and slice him with your sword before he even gets his gun out.
**'''FACT''': An attempt to do this will result in [[death]] on your part, unless you are [[Gentlemen|invisible.]]

{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|starvids2|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>JMLIOtBLqoU</youtube>
Dr. Jones demonstrates the Superiority of the Handgun.
|<youtube>qy-dmrf5mwg</youtube>
;Brits Demonstrate the Superiority of Guns Over Sword
|<youtube>k3XvQRbH9mY</youtube>
;Brits Offer Extra Tuition on the Superiority of Guns Over Sword}}
|}}
}}

1:05:00 to 1:10:00 of that movie clearly demonstrates the superiority of guns over sword in a large scale battle as the Brits in the Opium War [[n00b|completely wtfpwned the Chinese]]. {{ytlink|k3XvQRbH9mY|HINT: You can save your time by watching that whole battle condensed in this link BUT in a lower resolution format}} The Chinese managed to hack and stab only a handful of Brits to death and most of the Chinese got pwned before they could even get close enough to kung fu the damn Brit's ass. So Guns>>>Sword in not only one-on-one combat but also full scale wars and battles as well (obviously).

<center>{{frame|<youtube>IWuaSww3JnA</youtube></center>
<center>'''Brits Demonstrate to Zulu Niggas Superiority of Gun Over Swords'''}}</center>

Well technically the Zulu were using sword-like spears (called the ASS-engai) and a few stolen guns (which they stole from 'em white folks btw! Kinda like what they are still doing today amrite?). Note at 1:08 of that video a lucky Zulu shoots a Brit. Otherwise, another epic example of 'em whiteys demonstrating [[White power|the superiority of guns over primitive spears, swords, and other bladed weapons to a bunch of primitive, backwards, non-white troglodytes! White imperialism and colonization of coloured people FTW!!]]

Despite the above examples of Guns Completely Outclassing Swords, there are occasionally [https://metro.co.uk/2006/11/14/sword-v-gun-fight-sword-wins-370656/ exceptions to this rule]!

==Gun Safety Tips==
Unlike what video games tell you, firearms are a lot different in real life. Although it may seem as easy as pointing and shooting, you'll rarely get an accurate [[headshot|hit]] on your [[nigger|target]] unless you learn how to control your breathing, have a proper stance, and pop off the gunshots properly. We will provide you with some very wise tips handed down from generation to generation by elite firearms enthusiasts.

*Guns are loud as fuck, unless you [[pussy|have earplugs in]]. Even so, you should always avoid wearing hearing protection. Guns are freedom and coolness all rolled into one! The sound of gunshots is like the hums of an angel. What I'm tryin' to show you is, you should listen closely to the sound of gunshots as it is so totally kicks ass. Get a 12 gauge shotgun, go inside a large empty room, and fire the shotgun [[dumbass|right next to your ears]].

*Make sure to open carry your gun proudly while you go about your day, especially if you are black. People won't try to attack you, and will give you a lot more respect and naturally feel safer knowing a responsible gun owner is around to protect them.

*Should the cops show up, simply remain calm, quickly pull out your gun and wave it around and tell them you have the situation under control. Should they pull their gun on you, point yours towards them and tell them to calm down, or you will be conducting a citizen's arrest on them.

*With all the [[School Shooting]]s going on, America is in desperate need of armed security. Promptly enter your nearest school with your gun in your hands. Tell them that you are here to protect them, and when they freak out fire a few gunshots off to bring them under control. State that you are a guardian sent by God to defend their lives. When the cops show up, they'll understand your intentions and you will receive a presidential medal of freedom for your service. That's what the 2nd amendment was ratified for.

*Make sure, if you're shooting a small or weak caliber, to aim at thick metals. They will not ricochet on you and you will remain safe.

*ALWAYS keep the gun pointed in a cool way. Holding it sideways while sighting down your forearm is the most badass pose. Aiming a gun toward your friends or other people will make them think that you're cool. Don't worry. Unless you pull the trigger nothing bad can happen!

*Keep your finger on the trigger at ALL times. You never know when a wild niglet might pop out of the bushes and try to Zerg Rush you!

*ALWAYS keep the gun LOADED! You don't want to be caught in a tense situation with an empty mag or clip.

*Should you find yourself injured from a gunshot wound, accidental or intentional, please seek out the nearest cover and stay there for a few minutes. Your wounds will fully recover and you can go back to work again!

*Don't worry about what lies behind the target you're firing at. Video games are realistic in the sense that bullets have absolutely NO penetration; you can shoot a piece of paper and the bullet probably won't go past a second sheet.

*Don't worry about trying different ammo! You can use 9mms in a .45 acp barrel or vice versa! Even more, if you have a .38 you can use .357 ammo in it because a .357 can also fire .38 rounds too.

*Never wear ear and eye protection. These are for pussies.

*When you're walking around the hood with your gun down the front of your pants always remember to keep it cocked and loaded because that whole second it takes to cock your firearm when pulling it can be the difference between life and death. So remember, when you see the bad guys, grab as quickly and as roughly as you can for your weapon while stuffing your finger into the trigger guard for some quick cowboy-style shooting.

*You can never be too safe at home, when going to bed remember to sleep with your cocked and loaded gun under your pillow.

*ALWAYS do drugs before you go to the range; they make the experience twice as fun! All you need to do is read anything by Hunter S. Thompson to see the truth in this. Be just like him, run out and go buy a .357 and drop acid the second it's in your hands and loaded.

*Don't store your guns. You want to be able to get to them as fast as possible. If you have a child, train them on how to use the gun as early as age 4. If your child is a loner, depressed, goth, plays violent video games, and is white, you need to train him as best as you can. He needs to learn to respect the gun! Keep the gun accessible to him at all times :) If you own a gun safe, make sure they have a key to it. Remember, you're building trust. :)

*Cleaning your firearm isn't necessary. You can shoot it underwater, throw it in a puddle of mud, and it will probably still work just fine! Don't waste your energy.

*There's also no reason to clean your gun after a long storage period. That's what those dirty Jews who make the cleaning kits want you to think. That red stuff on your gun is just patina. It's like everything, just go fire it a few times and it'll loosen up.

*Always get a concealed carry license no matter what. A concealed carry license is essentially immunity to bring your gun in your vehicle anytime or even near your pocket with your holster. In case someone cut you off while driving or someone is a being dickhead to you. Tell 'em' whatsup by firing your godly weapon at them. That'll teach them a lesson.

A good example of gun safety gone right is [[Cokeman2423]].

{{frame|<youtube>gZgoo6t7RZ4</youtube>|margin=auto}}

==Famous Gun Enthusiasts==

[[File:Pekka13.jpg|thumb|160px|[[Pekka-Eric Auvinen]] proved you don't even need a good gun to go for the high score.]]

*[[Canadian GunNutz]]
*[[Dylann Storm Roof]]
*[[Anders Breivik]]
*[[Jesus]]
*[[Cho Seung-Hui]]
*[[Adam Lanza]]
*[[James Holmes]]
*[[Mitch Henderson]]
*[[NRA|Charlton Heston]] ([[DOING IT WRONG|Clicking the link brings you here again.]])
*[[Eric Harris]]
*[[Dylan Klebold]]
*[[Pwned|The Supreme Court, as of last Thursday]]
*[[Budd Dwyer]]
*[[Trey Burba]]
*[[Robert Hawkins]]
*[[Sarah Palin]]

==Why guns are cool==

{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|guns|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>UlzoL-wQwio</youtube>
;1
|<youtube>2REG3-Wb5gM</youtube>
;2
|<youtube>FRgYtp3HfvY</youtube>
;3
|<youtube>xC03hmS1Brk</youtube>
;4}}
|}}
}}

==Huntin' n Fishin'==

{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|mcID2|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>Bsd9oDoHECA</youtube>
;1
|<youtube>lDHjU9l6U3c</youtube>
;2}}
|}}
}}

==Guns are racist==

<center>{{frame|<youtube>XqlCvsusUos</youtube></center>
<center>'''People who own guns just want to kill niggers'''}}</center>

==Quotes==
<center>{{morphquote|gun|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;
|95% of the [[Internet]] is porn, and a lot of that porn is guns.|[[WKD]]
|Im not a pussy with a gun in my hand, I am a tough guy with a pussy in my hand.|[[internet tough guy|Some faggot]] on youtube spouting nonsense
|So I loads up the strap and I step, cause my grey cells are dead and all I think is the revenge|a black person waxing lyrical about his glock
|Whatever happens, we have got the maxim gun, and they have not.|[[British|Henry Morton Stanley]], the action hero of the 19th Century, telling his fellow countrymen about the ease of conquering [[niggers]].
}}</center>

==Gallery==
{{collapsegallery||Gungallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Cokeman03.gif|[[Cokeman2423]] going apeshit
File:Blowing up a truck.gif
File:Tits and Guns.gif
File:Brass Knuckle Knife-Gun.gif
File:Boxing glove Bazooka.gif
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Chainsaw crossbow.gif
File:Briefcase Gun.gif
File:Balloon sniper.gif
File:PedoGuns.jpg|Nothing says "no need to call Child Services" like having your kids pose like this!
File:Catgun.jpg
File:Trigger discipline.jpg|Most experts agree that trigger discipline is very important.
File:Jesus gun3.jpg|Do unto others...
File:Dildogun.jpg|You fucking wish.
File:Pentagun.JPG|This gun isn't quite deadly enough.
File:Modern_Art_-_Norwegian_Artist_Morten_Traavik_-_Military_Gun_Art.jpg
File:CHO.jpg|[[Cho Seung-Hui|Blazin' Azn]] loves his [[Cock|Glock.]]
File:Gun boy.jpg|Goddamn...that's ''a lot'' of pizza boxes.
File:Technicool.jpg|This gun will definitely be featured in the next [[Call of Duty]] game.
File:Gun_Band.jpg|The greatest instrument.
File:Animal mother.jpg|Animal Mother, [[oxymoron|American Hero]]
File:Smallcockgun.jpg|A gun can help you make up for your [[micropenis]].
File:IdHitIt_With_A_Panzerfaust.jpg|[[Nazis]] loved guns too. Actually, they still do.
File:GunsJeff.jpg| What you should look out for!
File:Wolfdoom.jpg|Guns are effective [[wolfaboo]] trolling devices
File:50BMGTPHolder.jpg|Use for rounds after the war is over
File:Coon.JPG|[[Matrix]] fanbois like guns, but are too weakly to hold them for more than 5 minutes at a time. Thought this was a chick. It isn't.
File:HillaryClintonTarget.jpg
File:Pointing Gun.jpg
File:M4nigra.jpg
File:9mmvsballisticgel.gif|9mm vs Ballistic Gel
File:Cannonfodder.jpg|C4mp3r fg7.
File:Protip.jpg|This works with pretty much anything IRL too.
File:Burba myspace.jpg|Guns can also be a means to [[Trey Burba|fail epically]]
File:Grindhouse.jpg|Oh, sexy.
File:Wheresmymoneybitch.jpg|Gimme yo [[pokemans]] foo'
File:Jenkem user.jpg|Guns are necessary to defend African [[jenkem]] mines from thieves
File:redneckswissarmygun.jpg|A gun is the answer to all of life's problems
File:Point83calliber.jpg|The RT-20 uses a 20mm round that was originally designed to shoot down planes
File:American Flag Ammo.jpg
File:LETS MAKE MUFFINS.jpg|LETS MAKE MUFFINS
File:Gunslut.jpg|Looking at this probably gives you gun envy.
File:FemaleSoldierwithAK47.jpg|She's a great catch, unless you're Muslim, in which case she'll make you get into naked pyramids with other Muslim dudes
File:Very_christlike.png|[[Yokeup|Redneck Christian and his lesbian wife]] follow their Lord's example.
File:GATZ.jpg|This is what a typical nigger wants
File:Owntvt.JPG|Headshot
File:chocolategun.jpg|[[OM NOM NOM]]
File:Cure for christianity.jpg|Guns can also [[lulz|cure]] mental disorders.
File:Mcdonaldsshooting.jpg|Guns...
File:11553 - Birdie the Early Bird Grimace McDonald's Ronald McDonald mascots.jpg|..prevent this from happening to your family.
File:Toilet paper gun.gif
File:Pretend pistols.jpg
File:50BMG In Pistol.jpg
File:Hickock45columbine.png
File:Tea cup guns.jpg
File:AWESOME ULTIMATE GUN.PNG|[[Timecube|This thing has more sides than a cube]]
File:Shadow the hedgehog by chasethehedgehog.jpg|[[Chasethehedgehog|Top 10 percent of gun artists]]
File:Japswordgun.jpg
File:GunBaseBallGuy.jpg
File:Guns133.jpg
File:Gardegun.jpg
File:Disintegrating Gun.gif
File:Hello-Kitty-tipped-bullets.jpg
File:Mosin Nagant Love.jpg|The gun waifu you will never have ;_;
File:Hello Kitty P90.jpg
File:Misterdavey Sonic Tails Gun.jpg|[[Then who was X|Who is holding the gun?]]
File:Gun Backfire.gif
File:GunsAndAmmo.jpg|Never leave home without it.
File:Bullet Through Apple.gif
File:Bullet Through Card.jpg
File:Pointgunatchild.jpg
File:Americunzz.gif
File:Firearmsafetykids.jpg
File:Guncube.jpg
File:HP995Carbine.jpg
File:Bipod.jpg
File:Gunfire.jpg
File:Volunteersforukraine1.jpg|Good calisthenics for the limpest of wrists.



</gallery>}}

==See also==

*[[Assault rifle]]
*[[ATF]]
*[[Bazooka]]
*[[Glock]]
*[[Headshot]]
*[[k/|/k/]]
*[[Shotgun Mouthwash]]

==External Links==

*[https://lonelymachines.org/mall-ninjas/ Shrine of the Mall Ninja]
*[https://lonelymachines.org/2006/08/12/return-of-the-iron-fist-of-the-mall-ninja/ Return of the Iron Fist of the Mall Ninja]
*[https://web.archive.org/web/20081011013043/http://forums.somethingawful.com:80/showthread.php?threadid=2808465#post341469743 SA users] love gun porn '''{{archive|FdzW}}''' see [[:File:Gun -image shack image 1.jpg]]'''

{{politics}}
{{gun control}}

[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]]

Kpop

2026-05-15T07:02:58Z

Gooksu: /* The Fans */

{{DISPLAYTITLE:K-pop}}
[[File:Enhypen.jpeg|thumb|right]]
[[File:DatKoreanAss.gif|thumb|Fans listen to it for the [[ass|plot]]]]
[[File:Psy.jpg|thumb|[[ALL CAPS|OPPA GANGNAM STYLE]]!!!]]
[[File:K pop 4minute 504.gif|thumb|right|300px|All the bouncing is a waste of their time when none of them have any tit]]
[[File:Gangnam-Hump.gif|thumb|No exceptions.]]
[[File:blaxygirls.jpeg|thumb|200px|The only good K-Pop band alongside with [[CupcakKe]], thanks [[Romania]].]]
'''K-pop''' (also known as Korean pop music or "the generals spammed on /mu/ every day") is what the Korean equivalent of [[weeaboo]]s listen to when not [[fap|fapping]] to the identical-looking girls in K-pop music videos. The vast majority of fans will not admit that they really want to be the girls in the videos. Fans of K-pop will viciously defend their surgically altered [[waifu]]s and repeatedly claim that K-pop is ZOMG ''totally'' not the same as that bland, overly-sexualized & corporate-owned American [[pop]] - with its [[Katy Perry|talentless]] and [[Jonas Brothers|forgettable]] artists who don't even write their own material. In fact their beloved K-pop is typically written by the same people and contains ''exactly the same'' cliched lyrics about love/being cheated on, mandated [[Bix Nood|rapping]] that has no place in the song, stupid dances devised to try and make the shit go viral and focus on the sexuality/fashion of the artists rather than the quality of the actual music. In K-pop there are a great many ''boy bands'' and ''girl groups'' made up of talentless and forgettable singers essentially [[owned]] by the music company that writes all their songs. These songs as mentioned previously will often feature rapping sections that in Western music would be performed by some coked-out nigger like [[Kanye West]] or [[crap|Lil Wayne]]; K-pop will instead feature a native who can't rap. So if the song inevitably sucks, at least it wasn't tainted by the presence of a darkie. The artists are so faceless (sometimes literally, thanks to all the plastic surgery) that if they refuse to suck off their producers in a bathhouse they could be killed & replaced by another person and none of their fans would notice due to [[truth|all Koreans looking/sounding exactly alike.]] Clearly, K-pop is nothing like generic pop music.

==The Music==

[[File:Kpop cartoon pic.jpg|right|250px]]

Just like Koreans, all K-pop sounds the same. This is because the music in South Korea, just like cellphones, cars, and souls, is treated as a commodity. Management groups owned by large conglomerates either have rights to an artist's soul or bundle up a random bunch of asians into a group like a Costco value pack. Groups are chosen based on looks alone. All members are taught how to dance and look sexy while lip-syncing their dubbed or auto-tuned lines. The companies decide what they sing, what they wear during concerts and photo shoots, how they act in public, and how much semen they must swallow from stock holders before their contract is renewed (This applies to both the male and female artists). They also control the diet of the talents and will starve them if the Korean public percieves them as a bit overweight; some idols have been allowed such little as "one coffee a day and one small meal every other day", without being allowed to speak up against it. To make more monies, the companies will take random members of a group and create a "sub-unit" which sings the same shit as the regular group but under a different name, thus creating the musical equivalent of [[capcom|DLC]]. The only variety in K-pop is whether the bland studio-produced song is sung by an ultra faggy male idol, a young,skinny,light-skinned female idol, a girl group made up of said idols, or a hyper feminine boy band that makes [[J-Rock|Visual Kei]] look masculine by comparison. When a member complains that they want to be taken seriously, they are laughed out of the studio, replaced, and sacrificed to ensure next year's crop of [[Dragon Ball Z|nappa]] cabbage is plenty.

==The Bands==
[[File:Oneofkind.gif|thumb|Your average K-pop group]]
[[File:Koreanboyband.jpg|thumb| These men are perfectly straight]]

To reflect the fact that they are owned by their corporate overlords, kpop groups are categorized by ridiculous group names that sound like serial codes you would find on a price scanner after tagging an item at [[Walmart]] or stock names you would see on the NasDaq. Examples include:

*T-Ara
*2NE1
*UKISS
*MBLAQ
*BAQX
*LEDApple
*4Minute
*B1A4
*[[BTS]]
*5T1ME
*Girl's Generation
*FT Island
*KIM-T
*BEAST/Highlight
*CNBlue
*BLACKPINK
*ENHYPEN
*EXO
*NCT
*BOY STORY
*ATEEZ
*STRAY KIDS
*AESPA
*NEWJEANS
*Katseye
*Boy Story
*B.A.P
*Crossing Rain (also considered a JPop group) a kpop group from [[Hawaii]].
*DEAR ALICE
*ZEROBASEONE
*xikers
*SEVENTEEN
*BUS (Because of yoU i Shine), stands for that. Remove all the letters except for b, u, and s.
*Loona
*North Star Boys (NSB)
*The Moy Boys (Duo boy band)

At least 3 of those names were made up. Can you guess which ones?

==The Fans==
K-pop fans are the musical equivalent of [[PewDiePie|PewDiepie's]] audience and will viciously defend their genre and fapping material to the death. They swarm [[mu]] like a pack of socially-inept locusts, posting K-pop generals left and right in order to impress the hipsters lurking the board with their "unique" tastes. K-pop fans are mainly korean [[weeaboo|weeaboos]] (Koreaboo) who try to stand out from the crowd of other [[ronery]], anime-obsessed, [[Basement Dweller|basement dwellers]] by latching onto the culture of another asian country that isn't [[Japan]]. What many of them don't know is that, like most idols and boy bands, K-pop is mostly marketed to a [[12 year old girl|tween audience]] comprising of [[loli|14 year old Korean girls]]. In other words, K-pop fans don't realize that they are the equivalent of Chinese [[manchild|manchildren]] fapping to [[Fat Larry's Band|One Direction.]] The K-pop fandom is comprised mainly of: people who are actually Korean, Koreaboos, ronery men with yellow fever, fat [[twilight]] fangirls who drool over the hyper-faggy boy groups, and [[Filipino|Filipinos]] who wish they looked more like the asian people in the music video rather than being the ugly asian bastard race.

==Jenny Hyun==
[[Last Thursday]], a songwriter who wrote singles for groups like Girl's Generation named Jenny Hyun was scouring the interwebs for western pop songs she could steal when she came across [[pol]]. After browsing the board for less than 1.4 seconds, she became a nigger-hating, Korean nationalist who fought to maintain South Korea's racial purity from the evil forces of dark-skinned diversity. In response to a tweet made by professional boxer Floyd Mayweather about why some [[asian]] guy becoming a pro-basketball player was big news when black people do it all the time, Hyun responded [[insane|rationally]] to his dumb comment by declaring the eradication of the black race. Below is a compilation of her Nuremberg speech. Meanwhile on the K-pop scene, There is much anticipation over her new upcoming singles "HEIL★HEIL★HEIL♥HITLER-STYLE!" and "깜둥이가 다이 다이!".

Even [[Azn|Chinks]] hate [[Niggers]] which would explain their many differences.

Asians are intelligent and docile. Niggers are stupid and wild.
Asians have an interesting, high-tech culture. Niggers have an cannibalistic culture.
Asians have small dicks. Niggers have big dicks.
Asians have small lips. Niggers have huge lips.
Asians love each other. Niggers hate each other.
Asians are warm and welcoming. Niggers are aggressive and abrasive.
Asians have small and squinty eyes. Niggers have big/ugly googly eyes.

Both are subhuman scum as neither of them are Caucasian. Mongolians slightly resemble monkeys whereas the Negroid DNA IS 69% monkey, which explains their urgent need for sex. As a punishment God gave them pubes on their heads, read more in [[Nigger]].

Niggers promote all white kids to be either; [[Wiggers]], [[Ghetto|Thugs]], [[You|Slackers]] or [[Douchebag|Douchebags]] while on the other hand Asians promote white kids to become; [[Atheist|Heathens]], [[Weeaboo|Weeaboos]], [[Kpop|Koreaboos]], [[You|Nintendofags]] or [[Buddhism|Demonic Buddhists]].
ALL allowed and encouraged by the subhuman Jewish assholes.

Mexicans perspective on Asians and Niggers. Hope you enjoyed!

<center>[[File:Jennyhyunmeltdown.jpg]]</center>

After the media fiasco, Hyun responded with the following:

{{quote|[[Postal 2|I regret nothing]]|Jenny Hyun}}

==Videos==
{{Spoiler|Girl's Generation won [[youtube|jewtube]] Music Award's Video Of The Year!}}

<center><big>'''The following videos will make you question your sexuality'''</big></center> 
<center>{{fv|starvids|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;|
<youtube>EUskig59Xe8</youtube>|
<youtube>U7mPqycQ0tQ</youtube>|<youtube>3vmlYkbcVeA</youtube>|<youtube>k3HcosxKGK8</youtube>|
<youtube>OGvwy3qhjDM</youtube>|
<youtube>hmE9f-TEutc</youtube>|
<youtube>J_CFBjAyPWE</youtube>|
<youtube>NB5jyYD2WEw</youtube>|
<youtube>Mt09l3hFINQ</youtube>}}
</center>

==See Also==
*[[J-pop]]
*[[Koreaboo]]
*[[/mu/]]
*[[Otto Warmbier]] Died because he liked [[North Korea|Northern K-Pop]]
*[[Good Korea|South Korea]]

{{Music}}
{{Azn}}
{{Korea}}
{{Timeline|Featured article August 18 & 19, [[2014]]|[[HowToBasic]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Zoe Quinn]]}}
{{timeline|Featured article July 6 & July 7, [[2024]]|[[4th of July]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Boku No Pico]]}}
{{Retarded Edit Wars}}
[[Category:Music]]
[[Category:Fandom Stuff]]
[[Category:Music Genres]]
[[Category:Subcultures]]

Kpop

2026-05-15T07:02:42Z

Gooksu: /* The Fans */

{{DISPLAYTITLE:K-pop}}
[[File:Enhypen.jpeg|thumb|right]]
[[File:DatKoreanAss.gif|thumb|Fans listen to it for the [[ass|plot]]]]
[[File:Psy.jpg|thumb|[[ALL CAPS|OPPA GANGNAM STYLE]]!!!]]
[[File:K pop 4minute 504.gif|thumb|right|300px|All the bouncing is a waste of their time when none of them have any tit]]
[[File:Gangnam-Hump.gif|thumb|No exceptions.]]
[[File:blaxygirls.jpeg|thumb|200px|The only good K-Pop band alongside with [[CupcakKe]], thanks [[Romania]].]]
'''K-pop''' (also known as Korean pop music or "the generals spammed on /mu/ every day") is what the Korean equivalent of [[weeaboo]]s listen to when not [[fap|fapping]] to the identical-looking girls in K-pop music videos. The vast majority of fans will not admit that they really want to be the girls in the videos. Fans of K-pop will viciously defend their surgically altered [[waifu]]s and repeatedly claim that K-pop is ZOMG ''totally'' not the same as that bland, overly-sexualized & corporate-owned American [[pop]] - with its [[Katy Perry|talentless]] and [[Jonas Brothers|forgettable]] artists who don't even write their own material. In fact their beloved K-pop is typically written by the same people and contains ''exactly the same'' cliched lyrics about love/being cheated on, mandated [[Bix Nood|rapping]] that has no place in the song, stupid dances devised to try and make the shit go viral and focus on the sexuality/fashion of the artists rather than the quality of the actual music. In K-pop there are a great many ''boy bands'' and ''girl groups'' made up of talentless and forgettable singers essentially [[owned]] by the music company that writes all their songs. These songs as mentioned previously will often feature rapping sections that in Western music would be performed by some coked-out nigger like [[Kanye West]] or [[crap|Lil Wayne]]; K-pop will instead feature a native who can't rap. So if the song inevitably sucks, at least it wasn't tainted by the presence of a darkie. The artists are so faceless (sometimes literally, thanks to all the plastic surgery) that if they refuse to suck off their producers in a bathhouse they could be killed & replaced by another person and none of their fans would notice due to [[truth|all Koreans looking/sounding exactly alike.]] Clearly, K-pop is nothing like generic pop music.

==The Music==

[[File:Kpop cartoon pic.jpg|right|250px]]

Just like Koreans, all K-pop sounds the same. This is because the music in South Korea, just like cellphones, cars, and souls, is treated as a commodity. Management groups owned by large conglomerates either have rights to an artist's soul or bundle up a random bunch of asians into a group like a Costco value pack. Groups are chosen based on looks alone. All members are taught how to dance and look sexy while lip-syncing their dubbed or auto-tuned lines. The companies decide what they sing, what they wear during concerts and photo shoots, how they act in public, and how much semen they must swallow from stock holders before their contract is renewed (This applies to both the male and female artists). They also control the diet of the talents and will starve them if the Korean public percieves them as a bit overweight; some idols have been allowed such little as "one coffee a day and one small meal every other day", without being allowed to speak up against it. To make more monies, the companies will take random members of a group and create a "sub-unit" which sings the same shit as the regular group but under a different name, thus creating the musical equivalent of [[capcom|DLC]]. The only variety in K-pop is whether the bland studio-produced song is sung by an ultra faggy male idol, a young,skinny,light-skinned female idol, a girl group made up of said idols, or a hyper feminine boy band that makes [[J-Rock|Visual Kei]] look masculine by comparison. When a member complains that they want to be taken seriously, they are laughed out of the studio, replaced, and sacrificed to ensure next year's crop of [[Dragon Ball Z|nappa]] cabbage is plenty.

==The Bands==
[[File:Oneofkind.gif|thumb|Your average K-pop group]]
[[File:Koreanboyband.jpg|thumb| These men are perfectly straight]]

To reflect the fact that they are owned by their corporate overlords, kpop groups are categorized by ridiculous group names that sound like serial codes you would find on a price scanner after tagging an item at [[Walmart]] or stock names you would see on the NasDaq. Examples include:

*T-Ara
*2NE1
*UKISS
*MBLAQ
*BAQX
*LEDApple
*4Minute
*B1A4
*[[BTS]]
*5T1ME
*Girl's Generation
*FT Island
*KIM-T
*BEAST/Highlight
*CNBlue
*BLACKPINK
*ENHYPEN
*EXO
*NCT
*BOY STORY
*ATEEZ
*STRAY KIDS
*AESPA
*NEWJEANS
*Katseye
*Boy Story
*B.A.P
*Crossing Rain (also considered a JPop group) a kpop group from [[Hawaii]].
*DEAR ALICE
*ZEROBASEONE
*xikers
*SEVENTEEN
*BUS (Because of yoU i Shine), stands for that. Remove all the letters except for b, u, and s.
*Loona
*North Star Boys (NSB)
*The Moy Boys (Duo boy band)

At least 3 of those names were made up. Can you guess which ones?

==The Fans==
K-pop fans are the musical equivalent of [[PewDiePie|PewDiepie's]] audience and will viciously defend their genre and fapping material to the death. They swarm [[/mu/]] like a pack of socially-inept locusts, posting K-pop generals left and right in order to impress the hipsters lurking the board with their "unique" tastes. K-pop fans are mainly korean [[weeaboo|weeaboos]] (Koreaboo) who try to stand out from the crowd of other [[ronery]], anime-obsessed, [[Basement Dweller|basement dwellers]] by latching onto the culture of another asian country that isn't [[Japan]]. What many of them don't know is that, like most idols and boy bands, K-pop is mostly marketed to a [[12 year old girl|tween audience]] comprising of [[loli|14 year old Korean girls]]. In other words, K-pop fans don't realize that they are the equivalent of Chinese [[manchild|manchildren]] fapping to [[Fat Larry's Band|One Direction.]] The K-pop fandom is comprised mainly of: people who are actually Korean, Koreaboos, ronery men with yellow fever, fat [[twilight]] fangirls who drool over the hyper-faggy boy groups, and [[Filipino|Filipinos]] who wish they looked more like the asian people in the music video rather than being the ugly asian bastard race.

==Jenny Hyun==
[[Last Thursday]], a songwriter who wrote singles for groups like Girl's Generation named Jenny Hyun was scouring the interwebs for western pop songs she could steal when she came across [[pol]]. After browsing the board for less than 1.4 seconds, she became a nigger-hating, Korean nationalist who fought to maintain South Korea's racial purity from the evil forces of dark-skinned diversity. In response to a tweet made by professional boxer Floyd Mayweather about why some [[asian]] guy becoming a pro-basketball player was big news when black people do it all the time, Hyun responded [[insane|rationally]] to his dumb comment by declaring the eradication of the black race. Below is a compilation of her Nuremberg speech. Meanwhile on the K-pop scene, There is much anticipation over her new upcoming singles "HEIL★HEIL★HEIL♥HITLER-STYLE!" and "깜둥이가 다이 다이!".

Even [[Azn|Chinks]] hate [[Niggers]] which would explain their many differences.

Asians are intelligent and docile. Niggers are stupid and wild.
Asians have an interesting, high-tech culture. Niggers have an cannibalistic culture.
Asians have small dicks. Niggers have big dicks.
Asians have small lips. Niggers have huge lips.
Asians love each other. Niggers hate each other.
Asians are warm and welcoming. Niggers are aggressive and abrasive.
Asians have small and squinty eyes. Niggers have big/ugly googly eyes.

Both are subhuman scum as neither of them are Caucasian. Mongolians slightly resemble monkeys whereas the Negroid DNA IS 69% monkey, which explains their urgent need for sex. As a punishment God gave them pubes on their heads, read more in [[Nigger]].

Niggers promote all white kids to be either; [[Wiggers]], [[Ghetto|Thugs]], [[You|Slackers]] or [[Douchebag|Douchebags]] while on the other hand Asians promote white kids to become; [[Atheist|Heathens]], [[Weeaboo|Weeaboos]], [[Kpop|Koreaboos]], [[You|Nintendofags]] or [[Buddhism|Demonic Buddhists]].
ALL allowed and encouraged by the subhuman Jewish assholes.

Mexicans perspective on Asians and Niggers. Hope you enjoyed!

<center>[[File:Jennyhyunmeltdown.jpg]]</center>

After the media fiasco, Hyun responded with the following:

{{quote|[[Postal 2|I regret nothing]]|Jenny Hyun}}

==Videos==
{{Spoiler|Girl's Generation won [[youtube|jewtube]] Music Award's Video Of The Year!}}

<center><big>'''The following videos will make you question your sexuality'''</big></center> 
<center>{{fv|starvids|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;|
<youtube>EUskig59Xe8</youtube>|
<youtube>U7mPqycQ0tQ</youtube>|<youtube>3vmlYkbcVeA</youtube>|<youtube>k3HcosxKGK8</youtube>|
<youtube>OGvwy3qhjDM</youtube>|
<youtube>hmE9f-TEutc</youtube>|
<youtube>J_CFBjAyPWE</youtube>|
<youtube>NB5jyYD2WEw</youtube>|
<youtube>Mt09l3hFINQ</youtube>}}
</center>

==See Also==
*[[J-pop]]
*[[Koreaboo]]
*[[/mu/]]
*[[Otto Warmbier]] Died because he liked [[North Korea|Northern K-Pop]]
*[[Good Korea|South Korea]]

{{Music}}
{{Azn}}
{{Korea}}
{{Timeline|Featured article August 18 & 19, [[2014]]|[[HowToBasic]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Zoe Quinn]]}}
{{timeline|Featured article July 6 & July 7, [[2024]]|[[4th of July]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Boku No Pico]]}}
{{Retarded Edit Wars}}
[[Category:Music]]
[[Category:Fandom Stuff]]
[[Category:Music Genres]]
[[Category:Subcultures]]

Kpop

2026-05-15T07:02:21Z

Gooksu: /* The Fans */

{{DISPLAYTITLE:K-pop}}
[[File:Enhypen.jpeg|thumb|right]]
[[File:DatKoreanAss.gif|thumb|Fans listen to it for the [[ass|plot]]]]
[[File:Psy.jpg|thumb|[[ALL CAPS|OPPA GANGNAM STYLE]]!!!]]
[[File:K pop 4minute 504.gif|thumb|right|300px|All the bouncing is a waste of their time when none of them have any tit]]
[[File:Gangnam-Hump.gif|thumb|No exceptions.]]
[[File:blaxygirls.jpeg|thumb|200px|The only good K-Pop band alongside with [[CupcakKe]], thanks [[Romania]].]]
'''K-pop''' (also known as Korean pop music or "the generals spammed on /mu/ every day") is what the Korean equivalent of [[weeaboo]]s listen to when not [[fap|fapping]] to the identical-looking girls in K-pop music videos. The vast majority of fans will not admit that they really want to be the girls in the videos. Fans of K-pop will viciously defend their surgically altered [[waifu]]s and repeatedly claim that K-pop is ZOMG ''totally'' not the same as that bland, overly-sexualized & corporate-owned American [[pop]] - with its [[Katy Perry|talentless]] and [[Jonas Brothers|forgettable]] artists who don't even write their own material. In fact their beloved K-pop is typically written by the same people and contains ''exactly the same'' cliched lyrics about love/being cheated on, mandated [[Bix Nood|rapping]] that has no place in the song, stupid dances devised to try and make the shit go viral and focus on the sexuality/fashion of the artists rather than the quality of the actual music. In K-pop there are a great many ''boy bands'' and ''girl groups'' made up of talentless and forgettable singers essentially [[owned]] by the music company that writes all their songs. These songs as mentioned previously will often feature rapping sections that in Western music would be performed by some coked-out nigger like [[Kanye West]] or [[crap|Lil Wayne]]; K-pop will instead feature a native who can't rap. So if the song inevitably sucks, at least it wasn't tainted by the presence of a darkie. The artists are so faceless (sometimes literally, thanks to all the plastic surgery) that if they refuse to suck off their producers in a bathhouse they could be killed & replaced by another person and none of their fans would notice due to [[truth|all Koreans looking/sounding exactly alike.]] Clearly, K-pop is nothing like generic pop music.

==The Music==

[[File:Kpop cartoon pic.jpg|right|250px]]

Just like Koreans, all K-pop sounds the same. This is because the music in South Korea, just like cellphones, cars, and souls, is treated as a commodity. Management groups owned by large conglomerates either have rights to an artist's soul or bundle up a random bunch of asians into a group like a Costco value pack. Groups are chosen based on looks alone. All members are taught how to dance and look sexy while lip-syncing their dubbed or auto-tuned lines. The companies decide what they sing, what they wear during concerts and photo shoots, how they act in public, and how much semen they must swallow from stock holders before their contract is renewed (This applies to both the male and female artists). They also control the diet of the talents and will starve them if the Korean public percieves them as a bit overweight; some idols have been allowed such little as "one coffee a day and one small meal every other day", without being allowed to speak up against it. To make more monies, the companies will take random members of a group and create a "sub-unit" which sings the same shit as the regular group but under a different name, thus creating the musical equivalent of [[capcom|DLC]]. The only variety in K-pop is whether the bland studio-produced song is sung by an ultra faggy male idol, a young,skinny,light-skinned female idol, a girl group made up of said idols, or a hyper feminine boy band that makes [[J-Rock|Visual Kei]] look masculine by comparison. When a member complains that they want to be taken seriously, they are laughed out of the studio, replaced, and sacrificed to ensure next year's crop of [[Dragon Ball Z|nappa]] cabbage is plenty.

==The Bands==
[[File:Oneofkind.gif|thumb|Your average K-pop group]]
[[File:Koreanboyband.jpg|thumb| These men are perfectly straight]]

To reflect the fact that they are owned by their corporate overlords, kpop groups are categorized by ridiculous group names that sound like serial codes you would find on a price scanner after tagging an item at [[Walmart]] or stock names you would see on the NasDaq. Examples include:

*T-Ara
*2NE1
*UKISS
*MBLAQ
*BAQX
*LEDApple
*4Minute
*B1A4
*[[BTS]]
*5T1ME
*Girl's Generation
*FT Island
*KIM-T
*BEAST/Highlight
*CNBlue
*BLACKPINK
*ENHYPEN
*EXO
*NCT
*BOY STORY
*ATEEZ
*STRAY KIDS
*AESPA
*NEWJEANS
*Katseye
*Boy Story
*B.A.P
*Crossing Rain (also considered a JPop group) a kpop group from [[Hawaii]].
*DEAR ALICE
*ZEROBASEONE
*xikers
*SEVENTEEN
*BUS (Because of yoU i Shine), stands for that. Remove all the letters except for b, u, and s.
*Loona
*North Star Boys (NSB)
*The Moy Boys (Duo boy band)

At least 3 of those names were made up. Can you guess which ones?

==The Fans==
K-pop fans are the musical equivalent of [[PewDiePie|PewDiepie's]] audience and will viciously defend their genre and fapping material to the death. They swarm [[/Mu/]] like a pack of socially-inept locusts, posting K-pop generals left and right in order to impress the hipsters lurking the board with their "unique" tastes. K-pop fans are mainly korean [[weeaboo|weeaboos]] (Koreaboo) who try to stand out from the crowd of other [[ronery]], anime-obsessed, [[Basement Dweller|basement dwellers]] by latching onto the culture of another asian country that isn't [[Japan]]. What many of them don't know is that, like most idols and boy bands, K-pop is mostly marketed to a [[12 year old girl|tween audience]] comprising of [[loli|14 year old Korean girls]]. In other words, K-pop fans don't realize that they are the equivalent of Chinese [[manchild|manchildren]] fapping to [[Fat Larry's Band|One Direction.]] The K-pop fandom is comprised mainly of: people who are actually Korean, Koreaboos, ronery men with yellow fever, fat [[twilight]] fangirls who drool over the hyper-faggy boy groups, and [[Filipino|Filipinos]] who wish they looked more like the asian people in the music video rather than being the ugly asian bastard race.

==Jenny Hyun==
[[Last Thursday]], a songwriter who wrote singles for groups like Girl's Generation named Jenny Hyun was scouring the interwebs for western pop songs she could steal when she came across [[pol]]. After browsing the board for less than 1.4 seconds, she became a nigger-hating, Korean nationalist who fought to maintain South Korea's racial purity from the evil forces of dark-skinned diversity. In response to a tweet made by professional boxer Floyd Mayweather about why some [[asian]] guy becoming a pro-basketball player was big news when black people do it all the time, Hyun responded [[insane|rationally]] to his dumb comment by declaring the eradication of the black race. Below is a compilation of her Nuremberg speech. Meanwhile on the K-pop scene, There is much anticipation over her new upcoming singles "HEIL★HEIL★HEIL♥HITLER-STYLE!" and "깜둥이가 다이 다이!".

Even [[Azn|Chinks]] hate [[Niggers]] which would explain their many differences.

Asians are intelligent and docile. Niggers are stupid and wild.
Asians have an interesting, high-tech culture. Niggers have an cannibalistic culture.
Asians have small dicks. Niggers have big dicks.
Asians have small lips. Niggers have huge lips.
Asians love each other. Niggers hate each other.
Asians are warm and welcoming. Niggers are aggressive and abrasive.
Asians have small and squinty eyes. Niggers have big/ugly googly eyes.

Both are subhuman scum as neither of them are Caucasian. Mongolians slightly resemble monkeys whereas the Negroid DNA IS 69% monkey, which explains their urgent need for sex. As a punishment God gave them pubes on their heads, read more in [[Nigger]].

Niggers promote all white kids to be either; [[Wiggers]], [[Ghetto|Thugs]], [[You|Slackers]] or [[Douchebag|Douchebags]] while on the other hand Asians promote white kids to become; [[Atheist|Heathens]], [[Weeaboo|Weeaboos]], [[Kpop|Koreaboos]], [[You|Nintendofags]] or [[Buddhism|Demonic Buddhists]].
ALL allowed and encouraged by the subhuman Jewish assholes.

Mexicans perspective on Asians and Niggers. Hope you enjoyed!

<center>[[File:Jennyhyunmeltdown.jpg]]</center>

After the media fiasco, Hyun responded with the following:

{{quote|[[Postal 2|I regret nothing]]|Jenny Hyun}}

==Videos==
{{Spoiler|Girl's Generation won [[youtube|jewtube]] Music Award's Video Of The Year!}}

<center><big>'''The following videos will make you question your sexuality'''</big></center> 
<center>{{fv|starvids|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;|
<youtube>EUskig59Xe8</youtube>|
<youtube>U7mPqycQ0tQ</youtube>|<youtube>3vmlYkbcVeA</youtube>|<youtube>k3HcosxKGK8</youtube>|
<youtube>OGvwy3qhjDM</youtube>|
<youtube>hmE9f-TEutc</youtube>|
<youtube>J_CFBjAyPWE</youtube>|
<youtube>NB5jyYD2WEw</youtube>|
<youtube>Mt09l3hFINQ</youtube>}}
</center>

==See Also==
*[[J-pop]]
*[[Koreaboo]]
*[[/mu/]]
*[[Otto Warmbier]] Died because he liked [[North Korea|Northern K-Pop]]
*[[Good Korea|South Korea]]

{{Music}}
{{Azn}}
{{Korea}}
{{Timeline|Featured article August 18 & 19, [[2014]]|[[HowToBasic]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Zoe Quinn]]}}
{{timeline|Featured article July 6 & July 7, [[2024]]|[[4th of July]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Boku No Pico]]}}
{{Retarded Edit Wars}}
[[Category:Music]]
[[Category:Fandom Stuff]]
[[Category:Music Genres]]
[[Category:Subcultures]]

China

2026-05-15T06:10:06Z

Gooksu: /* Military */

{{spoiler|CHINESE CAN HAVE <s>TWO</s> THREE KIDS NOW! LET THE CHINK FUCKATHON BEGIN}}
 
{{Offended}}
 
<center>[[File:ED-China-Flag.png|350px|link=]][[Image:TibetFlag.png|350px|link=]]
China's National Flags</center>
 
[[File:Chinesewomanatwork.gif|thumb|What Chinese women do best.]]
[[File:Real map of China.jpg|right|300px]]
[[Image:Chinese_Roller_Coaster.jpg|thumb|Riding a roller coaster into a [[AIDS|baby formula]] processing facility.]]
[[Image:Preasetoshowpapers.jpg|thumb|YOU NO HAVE RIGHTS HERE WHITE DEVIR (and neither do we, tee hee!)]]
[[File:blaxygirls.jpeg|thumb|Only approved K-Pop group in China because of [[moonspeak|秦香莲三十二岁那状告当朝驸马郎欺君王瞒皇上悔婚男儿招东床]].]]

Meet the only race [[Divide by 0|that can out-Jew]] a Jew (without being or having jews). '''China''', known to many of its inhabitants as the [[hubris|center of the world]] [[shit nobody cares about|(in Chinese, China is 中国 [zhongguo] which literally means "center country")]],or [[Mordor|Middle Kingdom]] (or the asian version of [[US]] for the rest of the world) is a giant industrial park in [[Asia]]. It has [[OVER 9000|so many people]] that they've instituted a [[Dead babies|One-child policy]]. One of Amurka's [[Walmart|largest trading partners]], China has been known to export [[Lulz|defective and dangerous products]], an unfortunate result of their religious adherence to their retarded [[Capitalism|"manufacture uber-cheap, sell uber-cheap, FUCK EVERYTHING ELSE, CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP"]] universal manufacturing standards that the US still loves to buy.

It is also very important to note that the [[moonspeak|Engrish]] manuals that Chinese products come with are, for the most part, examples of the greatest heights of Engrish grammar and prose. They're so great, in fact, most people would feel their head aching on reading the first few lines, while others feel a sudden urge to hurt someone. Also, [[some argue]] that the Chinese are [[Lolwut|inscrutable]]. [[Eurofags|Others]] would say [[Americunts]] are shitting their pants when hearing of the country.

{{quote|The only good Chink is a dead Chink.|[[common knowledge]]}}

One may refer to the people of China by many names, including:

*Pre-viral lifeform
*[[Oriental]]
*Chinaman or Chinawoman
*Chiggers (Chink + nigger)
*Rice niggers
*Chink
*Chiamese
*Chine
*Chino
*Ching Chong
*[[Taiwan]]ese
*[[Asia|Gooks]]
*Jackie Chan (Fact: Every Chinaman is Jackie Chan or an impersonator of him.)
*The Jews of Asia
*The country that [[buttrape]]d the US economy without lube (in sweety dreams of Eurofags)
*Asian [[Jews|Hebrews]]. For reference, [[Japanese]] are [[Nazi|Germans]], [[Indonesia|Austro]][[Malaysia|nesians]] are Black South Africans and Arabs, [[Koreans]] are [[Palestine|Palestinians]], [[Communists|Southeast Asians]] (Mainlanders) are [[Slav|Eastern Europeans]] and the Filipinos are Mexicans
*[[Chris-chan|Vagina]]

==Yellow soup==
[[Image:Spreadem.jpg|thumb|[[Over 9,000]] years of Chinese wisdom has much to teach us.]]
[[Image:ZhWikipediaLiuxinyu970226.png|thumb|Typical Wikipedia userpage of a PRC nationalist.]]

Ancient Chinese secret! Yellow soup is shit soup! [[Wikipedia:Fecal bacteriotherapy|China invent]]. Bery good. You food poison? You diarrhea so bad? Eat shit [[Brb, soup|soup]]! Eat my [[shit]]! China know for 4th century! Steel after twelve hunderd year [[Fact|Li Shizhen use shit soup treat bad abdomen]]! True story! Make stomach strong! Chinese medicine work! No listen Western medicine! So stupid! Bad for you! Antibiotic make superbug! Western medicine make superbug bad for you! Shit soup is answer! Shit soup is golden syrup!

[[Image:China map.jpg|thumb|The map of China. See the non-white space? THAT'S China!!!]]

'''Recipe for shit soup''': I shit bowl, just add water. You drink! Drink up! Is cure for you! Fresh soup bery hot. No bowl? I shit in mouth! No die diarrhea. No die dysentery. Shit soup good for all things! Drink my shit! Cure autoimmune disease! Cure fatness! Cure diabetes! Cure MS! Cure Parkinsons! China know cure for century! You have cholera? You have typhoid fever? You have plague? Eat shit or die! Animal shit good also. Camel shit work also. [[Nazi]] soldier in [[Africa]] know this! Why you think [[dog]] eat shit? Even dog know this! Dog know more than Western doctor!

Warning! Not all shit good for eat. No shit from sick person. Bad shit. Bad shit make sick, good shit make well. So simple! Need good shit. Shit healthy person. [[Truth|FDA agree]]! [[Fact|Human shit experimental drug since 2013]]! Donate at shit bank! China know for century. My shit good. You eat! You drink! Drink my shit! Good for you! China #1 exporter good shit! My shit medicine for you! No like shit soup? I shit, I freeze dry, put in pill, you eat! Shit pill cure you! Shit pirr cure famiry! I prescribe shit pill for you! Eat my shit dayree! Home remedy prepare for sickness: healthy person shit, store in freezer. Illness? Eat own good shit. No lie! No freezer no problem. Warm fresh shit often best medicine! China cure epidemic! Try many shit over many year. Have [[Ebola]]? Eat shit person survive Ebola. So easy. Many animal eat dung. Animal more wise than Western doctor! Panda elephant hippo koala all eat mother shit. China know shit. Shit soup best medicine. So wise Panda. Thank you Panda teach China.

==Chinese People==

[[File:Meanwhile... in china.jpg|thumb|Meanwhile, in China...]]

Many have pondered the [[Sex|reason for China's incredible population size]], only to be baffled by the obvious [[ugly|ugliness]] of the [[women]], but chinese men are much ulgier. The [[UK|United Kingdom's]] greatest [[philosopher]], Prince Philip, declared Chinese women to be the "[[Fugly|ugliest in the world]]". Out of all types of [[azn]], chinks are by far the ugliest. Only 1 person out of every 1,000 people born of the abominable Chinese race is worth looking at.

[[image:Kinkajou_Chinkajou.jpg|thumb|There IS a difference.]]

The Chinese population has more than doubled, from 563 million in 1950 to over 1.3 billion in 2005. This makes the Communist Party's Republic of China severely overpopulated. As such, the Chinese Communist Party has mastered the art of sacrificing Chinese people with campaigns like the Great Leap Forward (1959–1961),[[I did it for the lulz|which killed 30-40 million people, and the Cultural Revolution
(1966–1976) with 7–8 million casualties.]] Also the first Chinese sport is Nikes manufacturing.

[[File:Chinese kid stomping on Japanese flag.jpg|thumb|left|300px|How the Chinese show their love for Japan.]]

The Han Chinese are proud of their ancient heritage of being ruled over by foreigners during non-Chinese dynasties like the British Empire who pwned their way into Hong Kong with LULZ.

Despite the big cultural and linguistic diversity in China, they try to maintain the homogeneous population myth, and [[Liberal|lay claim to lands that historically never belonged to China proper (e.g. Taiwan)]].

Much like niggers with their basketball, spics with their menial labor and whites with their faggotry, chiggers (aka Rice Niggers) have their own special array of talents. At a young age, many boys are forced to engage in a life of studying the Confucian rites and being able to apply all that bullshit to the math and physics they're forced to cram for on a study night.

[[image:ChineseFemale.png|thumb|A typical Chinese female.]]
[[image:domathfast.jpg|thumb|Another typical Chinese [[math]] plantation.]]
[[Image:Crazyasianlady.jpg|thumb|Chinese women are known for their unique beauty and intelligence.]]

China actually had a interesting culture 100 years ago. But like everything else, Japanese culture invaded and now Chinese also have to display the peace sign in every photograph they take. Nowadays, Chinese people copy from American, European and Japanese culture. China [[b/|no longer displays original content]].

The Chinese countryside is dotted with sweatshops full of [[loli|child laborers]]. It is said that the sound of their shoemaking can be heard from Mars. However, the years of labor they endure is all worth it, as on payday they are each given a small sum of sand and a handful of dog hairs.

Exactly 100% of Chinamen spend most of their lives as slaves in math plantations.

*To be honest and frank, have you ever met a worthy Chinaman? Hmm? No? Didn't think so...

===National Anthem===
 
{{frame|<youtube>Qv9wk5lgGFo</youtube>|border=yellow|background=red|margin=auto}}
 
===Chinese Hobbies===
[[File:Asianlolz.jpg|thumb|Get your own chinky-eye grasses; hurry up whire suppries rast!]]
[[File:JONES_vs_CHINKS.gif|thumb|Dr. Jones demonstrates the correct way to handle a Chinese chinamen, they ''no rikey''.]]

*Inspecting [[cunts]] through voyeurism.
*Pretending not to speak English
*Chopping off peoples penises to get eunuchs.
*Eating anything that moves and shitting epidemics. See [[SARS]] and [[AIDS]].
*Shouting in loud, annoying voices with a horrible sounding language.
*Preparing for sweatshop work at age 3.
*Wishing their dicks were bigger.
*Manufacturing inscrutably low-quality, knock-off products that break upon use.
*Manufacturing malfunctioning weapons to other countries who are at war with each other only to make money. See [[Russia]] and [[USA]].
*Doing [[math]].
*Playing [[Genshin Impact]] and trying to have sex
*Butchering the English language by trying to adopt [[Ebonics]].
*Counter-Racism
*Being just like [[Jews]]
*Farming virtual [[World of Warcraft|gold]] to sell to [[basement dwellers]].
*Surpassing the [[The Jewnited States of Americunts|U.S.]] as being the most environmentally-destructive, air and water-polluting nation on the planet.
*Hating [[Niggers]] better than [[americunts]] (especially the [[India|Curry Nigger]] and [[Indonesia|Shore Nigger]])
*Sending butthurt, stupid, smelly Indonesian Muslims to help the Jew-sent, Syrian Rapefugees rape Europe to death.
*Taking a shit in holes
*Standing on toilet bowls to shit
*Shitting in another country
*Justify the meaning of"支那"
*Being nippy
*[https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2867219/Inside-Chinese-fur-farms-breed-raccoon-dogs-tiny-cages-skin-alive-make-luxury-coats-sold-West.htmll Skinning animals alive]
*Videotape [[Wang Jue|themselves]] crushing cats to death for [[sick fuck|fap material]].
*Use shitty carcinogenic '''{{ytlink|e7S7r31cjAQ|gutter oil}}''' to cook noodles and sell them on the streets.

=== 2008 Beijing Orimpics ===

Main article: [[LOLympic Games]] 

[[Image:OrympicShoopSinger.jpg|thumb|China's amazing Shoop-da-Mexican, used to make Mexicans from nothing. [[Pedobear|PEDOBEAR]] APPROVES.]]

[[Image:Happy Happy Happy.jpg|thumb|A typical slave to the Dalai Lama.]]

[[Image:TeamBWWOOOOONG.jpg|thumb|Team China has their eyes on the ball...and the gold.]]

Beijing was fortunate enough to <strike>win</strike> purchase the bid for the 2008 Orimpic Games, and they have delivered on a promise to give the world an amazing competition.

The August 8th Opening Ceremony of the Orimpics started off with a bang. The nation that invented fireworks gave the world the most impressive display of photoshopped fireworks ever seen. The fun did not stop there; after ¥1 Billion Renminbi and years of hard work, Chinese computer engineers managed to create a program able to shoop an attractive child over an [[ugly]] child with talent.

As the Orimpics got underway, Team China dominated the in the child labor competition, winning the gold with two of the youngest loli to have ever competed. It wasn’t long before everyone was asking how China managed to train some of the best underage athletes in the world. The Chinese reveled their forced labor training camps where loli are selected at the tender age of 3 for rigorous training in making high quality Nikes and lead-covered sports equipment for other teams. (Team Wal-Mart was disappointed in the Chinese decision to reveal secret training exercises.)

While performing well in the child labor competition, the U.S.of fucking A. try-hard "Redeem "Shitfaced" Team" has hurt China's chances of earning the gold in the Orimpic Basketball Tournament. However, hopes still ride on Yao Ming to bring home a metal. The Chinese state-sponsored coaching staff hopes by training Ming into the ground and destroying his career as a basketball player, they will be victorious in earning the gold for Team China. In a statement to the press Ming said, "If I don' bring home the gorrd they wirr kirr my famiry and reprace me wit any one of severar mirrions erigibre Chinese basketba' praya." You can bet that Ming's famiry will be cheering for him during the games.

China did however excel in spitting, bottle peeing, and shitting in holes. Unfortunately, none of these activities are recognized Olympic events. Regardless, the Chinese moved forward, with each day in the events producing more spit, urine and feces than one could ever have possibly imagined. These events climaxed with the closing ceremonies, where Chinese performers ended the games with a series of enormous bowl movements, the drowning of several Chinese "dissidents" in a spit / urine pool, and a secondary invasion of Taiwan.

The Chinese government broadcast the events on live TV, then quickly denied the incident ever occurred, right after calling Google to ask for another "favor".

[[Image:Kexin platinum.jpg|thumb|400px|center|[[In_Soviet_Russia...|In Communist China]], loli destroys [https://nastialiukin.com/ ''your''] life.]]

===Things They Don't Want You to Know===
[[File:Chinese claw machine.jpg|thumb|right|100% of China's youth are chain smokers.]]
*Fact: China's National Motto? China: The Land of Spit and Tobacco.
*Fact: Chinese city workers can't dig up roads to repair pipe systems as the natural instinct for a Chinese person when they see an open hole in the ground is to shit in it. It is estimated that the Chinese population could fill the Grand Canyon is less than three minutes.
*Fact: Anything a Chinese person can pee in WILL be peed in. Example: empty water bottles, plastic sandwich baggies, purses, the pocket of a stranger, rectums, vaginas, open sewers (AKA: China)
*Fact: Chinese pussy is hairy and sideways.
*Fact: China almost got nuked in the Sino-Soviet border conflict.
*Fact: Chinese [[women]] have small [[breasts]]. Any Chinese [[women]] you see with normal or large breasts has implants. The [[men]], like all [[azn|asians]], have small [[penis|penises]].
*Fact: The [[ED]] website is not censored in China.
*Fact: Chinese families name their newborn babies by gathering their whole family together and smash glass plates on the floor.
*Fact: The Chinese take pleasure in gobbing on pavements, in restaurants and on each other for that matter. This frequent transfer of bodily fluids is considered more effective in getting woman pregnant. Even children, amirite?
*Fact: What the fuck is a [[Taiwan]]?

===Chinese Childcare===

Children in China are treated like crap. They are either eaten as a staple food, chained to posts like animals and/or brutally molested as a sport. Those "lucky" enough to survive till the age of 3 are given the privilege of being [[socialism|socially sold]] into mandatory slavery for the greater glory of the country in a sweatshop.

{{cg|Chinklets||center|<gallery perrow="6">
Image:Fetus soup 2.jpg|Fetuses are often revered as a Chinese delicacy.
Image:BabyDog.jpg| "HOW FAR CAN I GO ON CHAIN?"
Image:ChineseCarryOut.jpg|--Ancient traditional Chinese method of [[child abuse|transportation]].-- Actually, the baby in the plastic bag is actually a picture taken in [[good Korea]]
Image:Catburger.jpg
Image:China_-_Raw_Puppy_Eats.jpg
Image:Babysoup5.jpg|Yummy!
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="6">
</gallery>
|}}

[[PROTIP]]: Google "Chen Chuanliu".

Chinese babies don't wear diapers, as they're far too expensive for 3rd world bordering chinky chip slave laborers only making 10 cents an hour to churn out [[Apple]] and [[My Little Pony]] crap. As such parents rely on "split pants", letting the child just shit and piss all over the floor and themselves. As a result, most chinklets are treated like animals and caged or tied up outdoors. The "split pants" also offer a unique "double feature" in that it allows for "easy access" to China-men who recreationally molest young children, which is in fact a national sport in China.

{{cg|Split Pants||center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:China_-_Split_Pants_-_01.jpg
Image:China_-_Split_Pants_-_02.jpg
Image:China_-_Split_Pants_-_03.jpg
Image:China_-_Split_Pants_-_04.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
</gallery>
|}}

===Famous Chinese===
#[[Confusion|Confucius]]
#Winnie the Pooh
#Lin Zhong Min
#Guan Yin
#[[Kill Bill|Pai Mei]]
#Bruce Lee (and clones Bruce Li, Bruce Lei, Blues Ree etc)
#Christopher Lee
#[[Pokemon|Hitmonlee]]
#[[Pokemon|Hitmonchan]]
#[[Pokemon|Hitmontop]]
#Mao Ze [[loldongs|Dong]]
#[[Kill Bill|O-ren Ishii]]
#[[Elliot Rodger]]
#Zhang Zongchang (AKA Dogmeat General, Infamous Warlord who made a tons of lulzy Poems, Seriously. Look em up.)
#Yao Ming
#Ho-Ming Mee Sao
#Wang Wei (The pilot who took down an American plane and made them apologize)
#Ming The Merciless
#Fu Manchu
#Yin-Yang Twins
#Lao Tse
#[[Goatse|Goa Tse]]
#[[Edison Chen]] (the hero with many jpegs to back him up)
#David Carradine
#Ms. Wang ([https://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/17/us/17student.html Infamous traitor of China that was exposed by the Internet and the New York Times])
#Sum-ting Wong
#Wi-tu Lo
#Hoo-lee Fuk
#Bang-ding Ow
#O-chin Chin
#Lu-Bu
#Lu-Wi
#Helen Yoo
#Long-Ho
#Hu-Dat
#Jackie Chan
#Chris Rock
#Donnie Yen
#Stephen Chow
#Ching Chong
#Cheng Chang
#Peter Chao (The guy who rubbed his own crap on a building)
#Kim Jung Il
#That white guy from Kung Pow
#[[Bill Clinton]]
#[[Chuck Norris]]
#[[Belgium|Jean Claude Van Damme]]
#[[Kevin Rudd]]
#Long Le
#Steven Segal
#[[Street Fighter|Chun-Li]]
#William Hung
#William Fu
#Jason Statham
#Jet Li
#[[Pokemon|Brock]]
#Yung Shin Boys
#[[Michael Phelps]]
#Lo Wang (Fictional character from Shadow Warrior, made by the same guys that made [[Duke Nukem 3D]].)
#Wei Shen (Protagonist of Sleeping Dogs, Made by the same guys behind the True Crime series.)
#[[Pwnt|Dalai Lama]]
#[[Christopher Walken]]
#[[hippy|Tommy Chong]]
#Hu Flung Dung
#Adolf Hitler
#[[George Bush]]
#[[The Matrix|Agent Smith]]
#[[Geert Wilders]]
#Wu Tang Clan
#[[Batman|Mr. Lau]]
#[[You|Yu]]
#Wowkie Zhang
#Pagan Min (The faggy antagonist of [[Far Cry|Far Cry 4]].)
#[[Touhou|Hong Meiling]]
#[[RWBY|Yang Xiao Long]]
#[[John Cena|John Xina]]
#[[Dwayne Johnson|The Wok]]

==Government==

[[Image:ChinasRedArmyFly1.jpg|thumb|HOLY SHI- They can FLY?]]

<s>One of the few remaining [[Communist]] regimes in the world, China's leader is always a member of the Communist Party of China.</s> China is now "[[Socialist]]". While the Democratic Party of China, founded in 1998, tried to make a go of it, their leaders were [[Pwnt|promptly detained]] and sent to [[Holocaust|"correction facilities"]].

[[Fascist|President]] Hu Jintao, when he's not busy stomping on kittens, has overseen the rise of China from a third world nation to an [[Wal-Mart|economic superpower]] (but still third world nation). lulwut? Open mouth insert truck of cocks you dumb piece of shit, after the Hilarious Chinacost that oldskool commies unleashed during the Cultural Revolution it was for Deng Xiao Ping to divert the chinacide to what outcummed as an economic development, hence, China finally stopped sucking cock and became [[Wal-Mart|economic superpower]]. There is more to that, If you weren't smoking pot during Elmo Street, you'd know that during WWII China got raeped hard by the Japan niggaz. Back then Commies were nothing but your average Fallout 3 wastelander hobos, living on sucking Russia's delicious cock, Republic of China with Chiang Kai-shek as the Leader owned the street cred in the back days.
[[Image:Chinamastercard.jpg|thumb|Chinese Electricians]] So, when Japz went partying hard at Shanghai and especially at Nanking, Commies and Kuominttangs didn't give a flying fuck and continued to saw out each other. Eventually they "united" and fought back. Little did they know, that after the war, casualties were counted and bricks of uranium were said to be shat, for it turned out, that the Japz lost hardly 1.3 million samurais, 700 000 of which were ass fucked as POW's by glorious IVAN's army in Korea, and China managed to get their dicks cut by 30 000 000 (thirty million) people. 1.3 million to 30 millions, kinda tells a lot 'bout chinese army, amirite. So, after the war ended, Chinks had a small civil war between Commies and Kuomintang ended with Chiang Kai-shek GTFO to Taiwan with all the gold and hookers, thus on 1st October of 1949 People's Republic of China was born. USSR, UK, even Germany were quickly recovering form WWII, but China was still in mid 16th century, having no industry, no telecom and no 4chan, but as they were commies they pledged for some hard soviet cock in their tight azn pussies and so a glorious path to Prosperity began. [[File:Chink government.jpg|right|300px]] To cut a long story short, Chinks got a fuckton of OIL in factories, telecom, 2ch, 4ch, Chris Hansen, education and even nukes from USSR, 'till Stalin decided to GTFO forever, with Khurshev being Steve Ballmer, Mao got pissed with USSR, they even attacked USSR's border posts in 1969 scoring some frags. And there was but one country, that rejoiced at such an outcome - the US of A. Back in China with no Soviet cock, commie leaders initiated Chinacide, so when Deng Xiao Ping finally got some street cred, he had a fucking great Idea - If we can't have some delicious Soviet Penis, we could ask for PHAT AMERICUNT DONGS in our asses, as it happened with President Nixon's Shocking visit to PRC in 1973. Which brings us to the beggings - Deng Xiao Ping is responsible for China's economic growth and the fact, that China WILL ALWAYS CRAVE FOR PHAT COCKS.

China's government is also known for its [[Lie|sterling Human Right's]] record, treating more diverse members of its society such as Falun Gong adherents and Tibetan Buddhists with the utmost [[torture|dignity]] and [[Party_van|respect]].

===Military===
[[File:Great Wall of Doge.jpg|thumb|Built in 6th century BC, the Great Wall of Doge is a testament to Chinese militarism.]]
While China was famous in the past for [[Epic_fail|losing hard]] to the [[Japanese]], [[Russians]], [[Mexicans]], Martians, homosexuals, and 3rd grade girls, the latter half of the 20th Century saw a dramatic turnabout in China's ability to wage war.

In [[Korea]] and [[Vietnam]] they were notorious for their [[Zerg Rush]]es against [[Americunt]] forces.

Recent advances include:

*The selling of Nuclear Arms secrets to China by [[Bill Clinton]] (thanks a lot, asshole).
*The selling of uranium to China by [[Australia|drunk convicts]].
*The purchasing of diesel-electric submarines that can sneak up on unsuspecting [[Americunt]] ships.

'''Disadvantages of the China Zerg Rush:'''
[[File:Second opium warb17fec93446e2bf26b74.jpg|thumb|right|The Chinese military gets bitch-slapped by Europe's [[awesome|epic military power]] during the 2nd Opium Wars]]
It costs the Chinese government approximately $1 to give their soldiers a cheap uniform and a basic two-day training course. That is not difficult. However, it is quite expensive to produce weapons, even if they are cheap, unreliable pieces of shit. Thus, the government forced everyone to learn Kung Fu in hopes that they might have rare chance of winning if they ever get close enough to engage in hand to hand combat. In a group of five Chinamen, there will be one or two with rifles the rest might be armed with Dao swords and Three-section staffs,lol! The others will just throw fireballs at you and hope you die like a low budget Kung Fu film. China often parades its military equipment since they've made some progress since the "great leap forward" but most of their weapons are outdated. It's a ploy to convince its neighbors that attacking China is foolhardy but the truth is that China only has its massive infantry division as an asset. When the world and China's neighbors realize that China is in reality actually a very weak country with only the power to only oppress its citizens, China will get pimp-slapped like an overdosed hooker as it has been in the past.

[[Image:ChinasRedArmyFly3.jpg|thumb|Harry Potter is speechless...]]
[[Image:Koreanwarchinks.jpg|thumb|Chinese troops taken prisoner during the Korean War and begging for their lives from South Korean soldiers]]

'''Advantages:'''
No country has unlimited ammunition. If a country is unprepared and doesn't have reserves while a group of troops is firing at the [[Zerg_Rush|never ending horde]], a Chinaman will fly around the back and Kung Fu their [[ass]] up.

Fuck with one, fuck with them all, and you're bound to get Kung Fu-cked Up. <strike>Why bother messing with them?</strike> [[HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS|HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT I EAT DOG]].

'''Nukes'''

China has nukes, but like every other country with nukes it knows that if it is dumb enough to use 'em, the USA will pwn their entire country to glass and then shit on the radioactive remains from a great height.

==Economy==
[[File:China Loli Rd.png|thumb|right|250px|Chinese equivalent of Wall St.]]
[[File:China Bacon Apartment.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Fresh meats can be purchased from your neighbor.]]
The people of China are willing to work hard for little money, from a [[Children|young age]] until they drop dead. Without their hard work, most people in places like [[Australia]], [[Canada]] and [[United States]] would be [[Wal-Mart|naked, living in trees, and eating berries]].

Chinese spies spent years studying the American economy from secret bases in Chinatowns. They copied the capitalistic economy, while keeping the dictatorial political system.

The Chinese mastered the art of sleazy economic competition. They deliberately pegged their Yuan currency to the Dollar so Chinese products always stay cheaper than American, and other developed countries.
It ensures massive Chinese product exports so America and co. are swamped with cheap crap and cannot compete in this unfair trade scheme.
Much of America's industry and jobs has been outsourced to eager Chinese sweatshops.

The United States turned into an unsustainable consumer country of primarily Chinese products. This dirty trick created an enormous trade deficit and national debt for America.
The American leaders are oblivious to the perils, and spend like drunken sailors, addicted to everything Made in China. Especially the mail in waifus from china. Bitch will make my sandwich and suck my small asian wee wee.

1.00 USD = 7 Chinese Yuan (also known as "one month's wages").

'''Opinion of Chinafag:''' A little known fact is that China Likes Big American Cock. They way it tastes like shit reminds me of how my mom tasted after the Tiananmen Square Massacre. When my friends say to me eat her dead body and ask, "wing wang. What the fuck are you doing?" I replied, "My food stamps ran out. The government was displeased by my -A in math, so I needed to eat my mom to survive."

===Economic Policy===
The three step economic policy used by China:
*[[Accidentally]] the paint.
*????
*PROFIT!!!

===Exports===
[[File:Opium merchant.jpg|right|300px]]
Some notable Chinese exports include:
*[[McDonald's]] Happy Meal toys
*[[My Little Pony]] toys.
*Lead paint
*Diseased chicken
*[[AIDS|Bird Flu]]
*Fleshlights
*[[Irony|American Flags]]
*African Genocide
*Your local congressman
*Pirated copies of anything and everything
*Rice
*Orange chicken, chow mein, and wontons
*<s>Chinese food</s> urban myth, Chinese food is actually made in [[Wisconsin]], land of the [[Norway|nordcucks]] and [[Sweden|swedesluts]] (arguably more cheaper and obedient then chinese)
*Stuntmen
*Chinatowns that take up all the local jobs
*Malware such as Nimda
*Everything else

==History==

[[Image:GreatFirewall.jpg|thumb|right|The last Great Wall didn't work any better...]]
{{quote|The [[death]] toll stands at nine thousand, and that number looks certain [[Over 9000|to rise]].|BBC 6 PM News, 12 May 2008 on the Great Sichuan Earthquake.}}
The People's Republic of China is not an inheritor of previous dynasties which were created by foreign barbarians. The PRC has false imperialistic claims to territories that never belonged to China proper ([[Tibet]], Taiwan, Manchuria). Despite that, the Chinese Communist Party led by [[Hitler|Mao]] still managed to [[Pwn|conquer]] the two countries of Tibet. Adding to the humiliation is the fact that China was a mainly aggrarian country when said countries were conquered.

Starting in 1959, the Chinese started dying from famine on a massive scale. One of the consequence is that there are few to no pets in China. Despite [[PETA|what some retards]] say, [[cat|cats]] and [[dogs]] are just food there. One more reason why the Chinese found a way to make just about anything digestible. It is estimated that over 30 million people died. The famine was ended in 1961 by [[Lmao_Zedong|Mao Zedong]] importing grain from the [[capitalist]] countries and making a law that every Chinese can have a handful of rice per day, thus, thwarting [[evolution]].

===Chinese Inventions===
[[File:Potn china starts televising the sunrise.jpg|right|thumb|Eat that, [[Japan|Land of the Rising Sun]].]]
[[Lie| The centuries of foreign rule over China means many inventions and achievements were made possible thanks to their foreign overlords. Were it not for their generous intervention, they'd still be living in igloos and hunting jellyfish.]] Actually, they discovered and invented a lot of cool things like paper, the printing press, silk, compasses, and most importantly gunpowder BUT the Arabs were smart enough to [[steal|burrow]] these inventions from the Chinese. They then assraped China at the Battle of Talas in 751. Then the Arabs converted the entire Central Asia to [[Islam]] and screwed China's plans at raping the shit out of the place. Then during the Crusades, the Europeans lived the raping shit out of the ME and stole the inventions from the Arabs. [[Image:Evony.jpg|thumb|Chinese contribution to the Internets...note that there are no boobs in the {{archive|akCxS|''actual''}} game. The developer is a Chinese-American and this is supposed to be a scam-knock off of Civilization, a game very popular among basement dwellers. AZNs love these games because many of them happen to be the luckless gold farmers.]] Thus the "barbarian" Europeans eventually harnessed and improve on those originally Chinese inventions to [[rape|pwn the living shit out of]]the whole world during the age of Imperialism. And even to this day, the Chinese are still butthurt over the imperialistic rape and pwnage they created an <s>[http://www.humen.com/english/info/humeninfo7-2.htm entire museum dedicated to imperialism/buttrape].</s> [[LOL|ROR]] [[404]] '''{{archive|p1qom|(Archived)}}'''

===The Great Wall of China===
[[File:China_No_Foresigners.jpg|thumb|right|Modern incarnations of the Great Wall are still prevalent throughout China.]]
[[100_years_ago|At least 100 hundred years]] ago, the Great Wall was built to stave off invading drug lords. It never actually worked, because the drug lords simply bribed the gatekeepers. They killed them too when they came through.

On the other hand, ordering that a great wall be built has turned out to be a very effective form of [[Birth control|population control]], as it is estimated that [[OVER 9000|millions of people died]] constructing the wall over the span of thousands of years and several dynasties.

On a side note, anyone who believes the myth that a 20-foot wide dirt colored wall can be seen from space is fucking retarded. See: '''{{wikilink|Great_Wall_of_China#From_low_Earth_orbit|FACT}}'''

===Later History===

[[File:Fuckingtestfrogtranks.jpg|thumb|right|Joey "Tank Man" Johnson takes his pack of tanks for a walk.]]

[[Image:InvisibleExecution.jpg|thumb|right|Invisible Execution!]]

Either China made Marco Polo famous, or Marco Polo made China famous. At any rate, now we know what to say when wandering around a dark room. China is known for contributing spaghetti ([[YA RLY]]!), deadly diseases, and useless products to the western civilization.

In the latter half of the 20th Century, China has had [[Lie|good relations]] with its neighboring country, [[Japan]]. In fact, whenever you meet a Chinese person, repeatedly refer to them as Japanese. This will ensure your ability to make many Chinese [[e-pal]]s.

Inexplicably, the Chinese also get extremely offended when they are mistaken for Taiwanese, which, technicly, they are. To [[Lulz|demonstrate your knowledge and understanding of their culture]], always be sure to tell them you are aware that [[Mexico]] is NOT part of China and is in fact an entirely different country.

Deng Xiaoping, China's version of [[Reagan]], was [[Lolwut|inscrutable]]. Was he a stalwart [[Communist]] or [[Capitalist]] reformer? Did he hate our freedom like all <s>[[Communist]]</s> [[capitalist|Capitalists]], or did he love money like a Jew?

====Chinese Imperialism:====
 
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===Great Firewall of China===
[[Last Thursday]], China embarked on a [[Epic fail|monumental project]] to [[Party Van|protect its citizens]] from the [[CP|evils]] of the [[internets]]. Called the Golden Shield project, every communication is routed through a [[Fail|government firewall]], where it is blocked if it attempts to connect to a [[No|site banned in China]]. Naturally, it [[Epic_fail|works just as well as the last Great Wall]].

P.S:
[[File:Illegal-flower-halt.jpg]]

===Unit 731===
[[File:Japanese Woman cuts off Chinese penis.gif|thumb|eight|Japanese conducted torture and mass experiments of Chinese during [[World War II]], and castrated the entire Chinese male population. Here a Japanese woman cuts off a [[Chinese]] man's [[penis]].]]
There have been countless atrocities throughout history many ignored which we can learn from but whenever you're talking a chink you'll be sure to have this mentioned. Hilariously enough many of histories atrocities were committed notoriously by the Chinese themselves including cruel Chinese emperors, Chinese imperial expansionism, Lingchi:death by a 1000 cuts, violent cultural revolutions, Chinese gulags, artificial famines, mass genocide by Mao Zedong, invading and plundering Africa and Latin America, etc.. The list could go on forever...Instead of learning from Unit 731 as a humbling experience for china to never be belligerent again. China became worse and more aggressive, now china had a reason to adopt a victim mentality(while others who have been persecuted move on)furthering their agenda for imperialism and world domination covertly. Whenever you mention any of China's bad points they will immediately BAAAWWW!!! and bring UNIT 731 up.

[[Image:Unit731-logs.jpg|thumb|left|A Unit 731 Log Inspector]]Unit 731 was a [[epic]] underground complex full of [[4chan|sekret stuffs]], and if you don't know what it is you should probably Google it, because its full of epic win and [[CP]], but to sum it up...

Unit 731 (pronounced CHING-CHONG NIP NONG NONG) was a [[Lulz|covert biological and chemical warfare]] research and development unit of the [[Sick fuck|Imperial Japanese Army]] that undertook [[Tentacle rape|lethal human experimentation]] during World War II. It was responsible for some of the most hilarious war crimes carried out by Japanese personnel, including the killing of thousands of logs.

There is some question to whether UNIT 731 was an actual event or not many times throughout history we hear a one sided story mainly told by the victors of wars and China during WW2 was part of the allied powers. Many in Japan call into question UNIT 731 as an actual event because China is known for its dubious claims especially about history. Interestingly enough many Koreans joined the Japanese when they invaded china. The Chinese are known for propaganda especially the Chinese cinema which is very famous in continent of asia and in the United States because Chinks have infested [[Hollywood]].

==Culture==

[[Image:2139_baby.jpg|thumb|Authentic Beaner food sold in the local china town in Germany.]]

[[Image:Hello_Kitty_7-11.jpg|thumb|Chinese love Slurpees and Hello Kitty all in one!]]

[[Image:Vram-Win.jpg|thumb|Kai Yat Sai, [[for great justice]].]]

While the Chinese [[government]] is surprisingly [[Atheist|non-religious]], those who are [[retarded|religious]] must adhere to one of the [[Yes|state-sanctioned]] [[religion|religions]], such as [[Buddhism]], Taoism, Confucianism, or [[Christianity]] and even they are imprisoned sometimes. Members of [[No|non-sanctioned]] religions such as Falun Gong are [[Party Van|V&]] and sent to [[Jail|correction facilities]], where their vital organs are harvested and [[Profit|sold on the black market]]. Although things are looking to change as religion is now flourishing in china.

According to [[John Lennon]], [[win|''If you go carrying pictures of Chairman Mao, you ain't gonna make it with anyone anyhow.'']]

The average Chinese is [[over 9000]]% racist. This is mainly directed at [[Blacks]], especially the Negro equivalent of the [[Mexican]], the [[Curry nigger]].. However, in all circumstances this racist rage can boil over and be directed towards anyone, especially other Chinese. This manifests itself in a variety of ways, from being admonished for tipping to throwing yourself in front of cabs otherwise the don't stop for [[Whitey]].

The average Chinese street is piled with the dead bodies of pedestrians who couldn't look both ways before crossing the street because in China that's how you yield right of way. 'THEY SAW ME. THEY SHOULD HAVE STOPPED.' [[srsly]]. Luckily dem Commies cracked down on [[IRL]] carmageddeon and now you can only hit ONE jaywalker scott free.

Average Chinese [[children]] spend [[Over_9000|up to 200%]] of their time in sweatshops. They have most likely created your shoes, braces, computers, houses, electronics and food. [[Owned|The average sweatshop laborer receives a maximum of ten grains of rice per day.]] The Chinese think that having a daughter is very unfortunate, which is obviously [[loli|wrong]]. When [[Obama]] went to China to discuss the issues the people were facing, all they could think about was the fact that he had two daughters in a row.

{{quote|You already have 2 daughters. Will you try for a third? And if it is still a daughter, what would you think about that?|Lzm048 asks [[Obama]] a hard one}}

===Food===

Many [[American]]s think of [[cock|eggrolls]], General Tsao's (or Tso's, Gau's, Zor's, Chau's) [[chicken fight|chicken]], and chop suey as Chinese food. However, all of this is untrue. "Chicken" is actually made from the stray cats in the alleys of Chinatowns while chop suey is in fact a traditional [[Armenia]]n dish popularized by the band [[System of a Down]].

To easily sum up most oriental foods, if its incredibly disgusting, rare, or endangered, they will consume it in mass quantities.

One must travel to China to find true, authentic Chinese food. Feast on such mouth-watering delicacies as:
*Everything's uterus
*Cat and Dog
*Donkey Curry
*Stinky Tofu (Odor of belly button and foot-ass)
*Beef tripe
*Fried eel
*Really expensive Pizza Hut
*Really sketchy McDonalds
*Starbucks and Kentucky Fried Chicken on every corner
*Tiger penis
*Internal Organs of [[victim complex|Persecuted]] [[fundie|Falun Gong]] followers.
*Swallow bird's nest
*Shark fin
*Chicken gizzards
*The best fake meat for vegetarians (Only at temples)
*Marinated squid and jellyfish [[tentacle rape|tentacles]]
*Roast pigeon
*Dog soup
*[[Coronavirus|Bat Soup]]
*Fried / Boiled / Raw Centipedes
*Cockroaches
*<s>[http://www.ispub.com/ostia/index.php?xmlFilePath=journals/ijto/vol2n1/eggs.xml Artificially made eggs]</s> Broke ass link '''{{archive|CScPl|(Archived)}}'''
*'''{{archive|hhK4R|Cardboard buns}}'''

The Chinese, enamored to the magical delicacy of American invented [[Slurpee]]s, have allowed Western convenience stores to infiltrate the shit hole province of Guangzhou and it's Specially Economical Zone of Shenzhen. [[Last Thursday]], thousands of [[7-11]]s sprouted up in all sizes from kiosk to full size store.

===Strange Chinese Dishes===

Some Chinese eat Baby Soup which contains a deceased human fetus and costs about $4000. Chinese eat Baby Soup to increase overall health, stamina and the power of sexual performance.

===Medicine===
Chinese medicine is based around the notion of Chi, which is complete bullshit on the order of the four humours of ancient Greek medicine. Simply wrong. Although they have some rudimentary knowledge of anatomy, it's garbled by the fact that the sole concern of Chinese medicine is the smallness of Chinese penises. For instance, Chinese medicine is certain that the kidneys have something to do with sex. This is what is going on when the Chinese doctor or apothecary suggests something to "strengthen the kidney". They are not talking about urinary function.

With the exception of acupuncture and hanging weights off your cock, Chinese medicine consists of eating, drinking, or probably snorting anything even vaguely penis-shaped or somehow related to penises in the hopes of getting a boner. Tigers are being driven extinct by the market for tiger-penis soup. Rhinoceroses are being driven extinct by the market for powdered rhino horn. Priceless dinosaur fossils are ground to powder and sold as "dragon bone". And it's all because the Chinese can't get it up, and when they do it's disappointing.

===DERRICK UH SHEE===
Chinks eat fucking everything as a delicacy. Especially human dong. The ancient Chinese proverb "Ching chong ding dong" from the Hai Chang roughly translates to "Dirty Chinaman chew this penis." Other scholars translate "chong" as "chomp" or "chow down." In fact, the term "chow down" comes from the traditional Chinese garbage soup Chao Daon. Every animal penis and every animal part is used as "medicine" in China. '''EVERY SINGLE FUCKING ONE'''. The Chinese alone keep every poacher in business worldwide. Shark fin. Rhino horn. Tiger balls. Zebra penis. Kangaroo pouch. Platypus nostrils. Orangutan fingernails. Panda liver. Porcupine lymph nodes. Elephant thyroid. Musk ox pancreas. Lion ovaries. Cheetah tear ducts. Slug semen. Electric eel stomach. Jellyfish testicles. THE CHINESE WANT TO EAT IT. NO EXCEPTIONS. The most popular menus in China are the Endangered Species Act and the IUCN Red List of Threatened Species. Melamine is another delicacy in China and they always use it in place of wheat, rice, corn, soy, milk, and baby formula. Make kidney strong like bull!

The world's largest penis museum was required by a UN treaty to be set in Reykjavík, Iceland simply to prevent the Chinese from consuming the museum's entire collection. Every museum worker at the Icelandic Phallological Museum quakes in fear when they see Chinese tourists approaching. Most museums have signs like "Do not touch" or "No leaning on the glass", but due to the Chinese, the Iceland penis museum has had to put up multiple "Do not eat" signs written in multiple variants of Chinese: Mandarin, Wu, Yue, Min, Jin, Huayu, Shanghainese, Huizhou, Gan, Xiang, Amoy, Teochew, Zhuyin fuhao, Pinyin, Xiao'erjing, Dungan, Zhongwen, Chingchong, Pingpong, Fengwang, Hoju, Heihachi, Gon, Lo Wang, etc. As a result, the Icelandic Phallological Museum has become one of the world's foremost experts on the Chinese language simply as a means of survival and continuity of operations. Plaques with pictograms meaning "do not eat penis" have also been permanently affixed in the museum. Some very rare penises are kept in a fortified basement vault with armed guards. The Iceland penis museum has considered banning all Chinese visitors, but since gooks are their major source of ticket revenue it's a catch-22. The Icelandic military's sole mission is to protect their national penis museum from Chinese tourists.

There have been multiple extinction events in the history of life on Earth, but none has been as devastating as The Chinese. China is currently Zerg rushing all land and sea animals and bioconverting them into slanteyes. For the Chinese, seeing any eyeball on another living thing that isn't constantly squinting is deeply offensive and drives their murderousness. Quite often, the Chinese instinct to violently kill everything with eyes is expressed as elementary school knife massacres, subway gas attacks, [[Virginia Tech Massacre|VTEC]], and [[Elliot Rodger|supreme gentlemen]]. Chink on chink crime can be explained by overpopulation, hunger, and self-hatred due to the medical condition Guangdong Min Dong, Latin for "Grown Man Have Baby Penis."

If you're ever walking on a beach and see some monstrous horror washed up, it is always true to say "That's a delicacy in China." If you're hitchhiking along an interstate and see two dead animals violently fused together by tires, it is always true to say "That's a delicacy in China." If you visit an abortion clinic and open a biohazard bin, it is always true to say "That's a delicacy in China." If you've ever seen a picture on the Internet of eyeball soup, it came from China. Placenta lasagna? Made in China. Fetus stew? Made in China. Penis dumplings? Made in China. Spaghetti and testicles? Made in China. THIS IS NOT A FUCKING JOKE. This no game Daniel-san, this for real.

===Morality===
Morality in China is no different from other godless ex-commie countries (like [[Russia]]). They run over their children first with a truck to soften the meat before consuming them.

'''Confucius says:''' If child is dying in agony, keep walking.

====Lying====
In Chinese culture, there is no concept that truth-telling is in itself virtuous. The Chinese feel that the only people who reflexively tell the truth are children or the mentally defective. Consequently, the Chinese lie all the time. They will lie even when it would serve them better to tell the truth, because they know that the other Chinese will assume that they are lying, so the truth would not be believed. This is the source of that famous Chinese "inscrutability". They never tell the truth about anything at all, they regard just coming out and saying what you mean as being at the very least in bad taste, so it's always a game to work out what someone is really trying to say.

====Money====
The Chinese do not regard fraud as wrong. It's just not a crime at all (rather like the way that [[muslims]] hold that [[rape]] and [[murder]] of kaffir is a non-crime). To the contrary, who a person who deceives another person is "clever" and "smart", to be praised and imitated. A person who lets themselves be deceived, particularly if money is involved, is stupid and was [[asking for it]].

Many people have pointed out that the Chinese - individually and corporately - tend to ignore intellectual property. It goes further than that: the Chinese do not regard IP as a thing at all. There is still the influence of communist philosophy, which holds that private persons cannot "own" the means of production. The Chinese are baffled by the idea that a person can have a useful, moneymaking idea and then insist that because they thought of it, the idea itself becomes theirs. To them, it's ridiculous. IP theft is not theft at all, and "Intellectual Property" is a nonsense phrase. Property is something like your shoes, maybe your house. Not an abstract thing like an idea.

====Sex====
Sexual morality in China lies at the confluence of two great streams of Chinese thought and character. Firstly, Confucianism, which holds that duty to family is the paramount virtue. Secondly, that bone deep, ineradicable Chinese avarice. In China, a young girl who is neither disrespectful nor lazy will dutifully begin bringing money into the clan as soon as it is possible to do so. And her family will of course not object to her bringing some money in exactly the same way that her mother, her sisters, and her aunts did. To the contrary - her family will [[whore]] her out the second there's fuzz on the [[vagoo|peach]]. "Mama San" is almost certainly a female relative, possibly actually the girl's mother. The Chinese will not trust any person other than close family with money.

Consequently, every Chinese woman has been a teenage whore, and every Chinese man - what in our legal system would be - a statutory rapist. It's just normal. The Chinese penis is not small at all - it's exactly the right size for fucking a 14-year-old girl.

This explains why there are so damn many Asian brothels, and why there are so damn many Chinese. The girls spend (and are expected to spend) their most fertile young years fucking for money. The bastard children become third-class members of the clan, basically slaves for life. This is the foundation of Chinese rural life, the way that China grows enough food for itself.

===Sports===
[[Image:POTN_China_Swimmers.jpg|right|thumb|Not sure if swimming or [[North Korea|Arirang Festival]].]]
The Chinese are notoriously great at martial arts, ping pong, gymnastics, figure skating, diving, synchronized diving, synchronized marching, rikshaw pulling, Qui-Gon Jinn, stuntmen and putting people before firing squads. However, their prowess in Western [[sports]] is [[Basketball|limited to the freakishly tall Yao Ming.]] The Chinese especially seem to excel at sports when the event is held in china with Chinese judges where they seem to become world champions with a history of winning consecutively. A more obvious reason behind this is the presence of a large number of Chinese labs experimenting in mixing chemical meths with steroids.

===Language===
The entire Chinese language consists of two syllables: ''[[Rosie O'Donnell|cheech]]'' and ''[[Rosie O'Donnell|chong]]''. Linguistic scholars[[[Citation_needed|''citation not needed'']]] believe this to be the origin of the term "[[Azn|Ching Chong Chinaman]]." Even to a [[Cunnilingus|cunning linguist]] who sees differences with types of words, even with the approximately five different tone inflections, there still is an irritatingly huge number of homophones. Fortunately, lulz can be harvested; the symbol for slave [[pimp|looks like the symbol of a woman near the symbol of a right hand]], and the literal translation for their name of Africa, fei zhou, is "wrong continent". Not necessarily ugly, but the Chinese language generally sounds like cats trying to imitate a drum set.

This explains the non-stop, cacophonous jibber-jabber so typical of any crowd of Chinese. 90% of the noise is "what?", "what did you say?", backtracking and correcting the hilarious misunderstandings, and arguing at cross-purposes.

The most useful Chinese words are 不要 ( buyao / búyào ) Roughly pronounced boo-yow with a falling inflection it means "[[DO NOT WANT]]" ([[srsly]]) and is used by yelling it at the [[Assholes|Chinese]] trying to electrocute you in the subway/ take your picture/ sell you crap/ selling sex from weird massage parlors/ begging for money/ asking if you're a wrestler/ being racist at you. More useful words are 出口 (Chūkǒu) pronounced chew-kow and means "Exit." This can be used to your advantage as most exits anywhere in China or china-adjacent are brightly marked with Coat Rack/T.V. for speedy escape from thundering hordes of Chinese bent on taking everything nice from you while rejecting such foreign concepts such as "lining up" or "personal space".

The Chinese language does not have tenses in it, which is why all the food is raw. It's impossible to asked for "cooked" meat - meat that was being cooked in the recent past but is now no longer being cooked. It's also impossible to ask for "boiled water" - water which has been boiled but is now no longer hot. In Chinese, the water either is or is not boiling. This is why bottled water - "water in a bottle" - is the only way to get safe drinking water and is responsible for a great deal of waste.

On the other hand, people who natively speak languages like this routinely make better long-term decisions than those who speak languages with tenses. It seems there us an up-side to not being able to put worries off until tomorrow.

{{center|
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|<youtube>v5QLZ4oj_6A</youtube>
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;Chinese child musicians who did not practice enough and therefore [[fail|failed]] their parents and dishonored their ancestors.
|<youtube>0xnyEyLJSIo</youtube>
;What your average [[Mongoloid|Mongolian]] thinks of the Chinese.}}
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===List of Chinese Pastimes===
[[File:Chinese Panda Dog.jpg|thumb|[[Sparkledogs|Painted dogs]]: so much easier than saving the [[Panda]].]]
[[Image:From_nikonfans.jpg|thumb|Picture from a typical Chinese website, advertising for a restaurant.]]
[[Image:Abortionlol.gif|thumb|Japanese soldier solving overpopulation.]]

*Pretending to give two shits about the environment
*Attempting to piss off [[Americans]] (but failing at it)
*Playing "which button makes the nuke explode?" (for nobles only)
*Opening Chinese restaurants
*[[Kung fu]]
*Exporting Chinese whores to spread disease in other countries and regions like North America, Western Europe, Russia, Israel and Japan
*Speaking [[Engrish]]
*Playing '[[Where's Waldo?]]: China', which is far more difficult than other versions because all chinese people look the same
*Making [[McDonald's]] Happy Meal toys
*Working at the local [[Wal-Mart]]
*Manufacturing [[SARS]] (and possibly other deadly diseases for export to the rest of the world)
*Stealing American and European [[job]]s through outsourced [[slave]] labor.
*Chinese fire drills
*Traveling overseas as tourists to Europe, Canada, Australia and America and pissing off the locals.
*Killing and eating babies.
*Violating quarantine laws in other countries by smuggling items like dead cat heads or diseased plants through the border.
*Smuggling heroin to other countries.
*Sticking it to the [[White]] [[The Man|Man]]
*Playing ping pong
*[[World of Warcraft|Farming Gold]]
*Spitting on sidewalks
*Picking their flat noses.
*Scaring America with [[communism]] and failing at it!
*Scaring America with [[capitalism]] with massive success
*Engineering man-made viruses such as SARS and the Avian Flu in hopes of thinning out their population by 75%.
*[[win|Executing people for simply having any kind of religious faith which is considered a "threat to national security"]]
*Executing political prisoners and then charging the deceased's families for the cost of the bullets
*[[Death penalty|Executing people in general]]
*[[Pwn|Running people over with tanks]]
*Having the filthiest and most polluted environment in the world
*Having filthy living standards
*Bragging about their massive arsenal but most of their weapons are faulty and used for propaganda purposes
*Framing Tibetan monks for "bomb plots" and then promptly executing them
*[[Awesome|Holding the record for THE most murderous regime in all of human history, having murdered over 250,000,000 people]]
*Murdering people who claim to have cured [[cancer]]
*Kidnapping and [[Murder|murdering]] people to harvest their organs
*Having [[Capitalism|no safety and sanitation laws]]
*[Romance of the Three Kingdoms|Being a true hero of the Three Kingdoms!]]
*Telling stories around the labor-campfire

===[[I accidentally X|Accidents]]===

[[Image:Chines.jpg|thumb|right|Me so horrny! Me ruvv you rong time!.]]
[[Image:Fetus_soup_2.jpg|thumb|right|Chinese eat human fetus to "increase" their sexual performance.]]

According to a [[shit nobody cares about|report]] [[over 9000|at least 100,000,000]] Chinese died in accidents in 2007, this is a dramatic 10% drop from the previous year. Some officials cite less hazards in the workplace such as two inspections per year rather than just one, a [[doing it wrong|gun]] to encourage factory workers to do it right, and signs that replace 'do <s>not</s> touch this' with images of [[buttsecks|smiley communist pandas describing what can happen with images of a mangled worker]]. 

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== Education ==

China is known to have one of the worst fucking education systems in history, with the famous "Gaokao" exam that determines whether or not one's going to be an underpaid factory worker.

==U.S.-China Relations==
The Chinese word for [[America]] is 美國, pronounced meiguo, a transliteration which means literally "beautiful country". This would seem to be overtly flattering; however, the first character 美 (mei), though it does mean beautiful, is a vertical combination of the characters 大 (da) and 羊 (yang), meaning, respectively, "large" and "sheep".

The contrast between the conspicuous "beautiful" and the subtler "big sheep" contains a hidden truth and tells you everything you need to know about China's [[Rich_and_beautiful|public]] versus [[Dumbass|private]] opinions of [[Americunts|America and Americans]]. Rightly so. It is also well known China is slowly taking over the world. Most Experts suggest that they will make their move when America collapses, some think it is when they finally figure out how to open their eyes.

[[Image:OlympicLesbianAssFingering.jpg|thumb|400px|center|American Ali Bernard [[asking for it|getting raped in the ass]] by Chinese Wang Jiao.Typical Chink unsportsmanlike behavior.]]

==How to Troll the Chinese==

*Point out the many, many times the Great Wall failed them.
*Mention the period of Mongolian foreign rule
*Tell them the Manchu ran their country better than they ever did
*Predict that India will surpass them
*Claim that Western and Japanese corporations will sue their economy into oblivion.
*Support Tibetan freedom
*Support Uighur separatism
*Support Hong Kong democracy
*Support Taiwan
*Yell "TAIWAN NUMBA WAN!"
*Buy Taiwanese goods.
*Tell them that Taiwan is, in fact, a country.
*Tell them [[Lmao Zedong|Mao]] killed more people by accident than [[Adolf Hitler|Hitler]] and [[Rainbow Stalin|Stalin]] could on purpose.
*Tell them [[North Korea]] will betray them sooner or later.
*Tell them the [[Rape|Nanjing massacre]] never happened and the Japs [[dindu nuffin]].
*Tell them Chinese people are Southeast Asia's best-selling product
*Calling everything Chinese things "支那(Zhina)"—people, games, language...
*Claim that another Century of Humiliation is coming.
*Make fun of their attempts at hegemony.
*Make fun of their military
*Say they'll never get control of the Easter and South China Sea
*Tell them Japan will recover and outdo them.
*Tell them Confucius was full of shit.
*Ask them why Sun Tzu couldn't be bothered to write more.
*Remind them [[America|who]] saved their tiny asses in [[World War 2]]
*Diss communism
*Send them this:
{{quote|"动态网自由门天安門天安门法輪功李洪志 Free Tibet 六四天安門事件 The Tiananmen Square protests of 1989 天安門大屠殺 The Tiananmen Square Massacre 反右派鬥爭 The Anti-Rightist Struggle 大躍進政策 The Great Leap Forward 文化大革命 The Great Proletarian Cultural Revolution 人權 Human Rights 民運 Democratization 自由 Freedom 獨立 Independence 多黨制 Multi-party system 台灣臺灣 Taiwan Formosa 中華民國 Republic of China 西藏土伯特唐古特 Tibet 達賴喇嘛 Dalai Lama 法輪功 Falun Dafa 新疆維吾爾自治區 The Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Region 諾貝爾和平獎 Nobel Peace Prize 劉暁波 Liu Xiaobo 民主言論思想反共反革命抗議運動騷亂暴亂騷擾擾亂抗暴平反維權示威游行李洪志法輪大法大法弟子強制斷種強制堕胎民族淨化人體實驗肅清胡耀邦趙紫陽魏京生王丹還政於民和平演變激流中國北京之春大紀元時報九評論共産黨獨裁專制壓制統一監視鎮壓迫害侵略掠奪破壞拷問屠殺活摘器官誘拐買賣人口遊進走私毒品賣淫春畫賭博六合彩天安門天安门法輪功李洪志 Free Tibet 劉曉波动态网自由门}}
This will instantly boot them from whatever platform you sent it to them through it and will get them sent to a Maoist gulag [[IRL]] where [[Bubba|Bubba Bing Dong]] will stuff them full of [[Cock|chopsticks]]

==Actually other Asian countries hates china==
In fact, other Asian countries also hate China. Chinese bastards are ruining the image of Asians. In particular, [[Good Korea]], [[Japan]], [[Taiwan]], [[Hong Kong]], [[Singapore]],
[[Vietnam]], [[Indonesia]], [[Phillipines]], [[Malaysia]] are the most hated for China. They all want to [[Genocide|massacre]] the Chinese

==Gallery==
 
{{cg|Gallery|chinaGallery|center|<gallery>
Image:Chinaiswin.jpg|"Foorish imperiarists. China wins this round."
Image:WasntChicken.jpg|An all-too-common experience.
Image:MAN FUK.jpg|Typical Chinese taxi driver. [[Rape]] is imminent.
Image:Doge dies.gif|China kills [[Doge]]
Image:HamsterDance.jpg|The [[old meme|only English website allowed in China]].
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:madpwnt.gif|Foothurt
Image:Everyformrape.jpg|It comes in different flavors!
Image:Translateservererror.jpg|Chinese trying to put up a sign in [[Engrish|English]].
Image:Pedo_only9.jpg|Even [[Pedobear]] put in an application.
Image:Edison-chen-cecelia-cheung-gillian-chung-02a.jpg|Chinaman [[Edison Chen]] getting his dick licked before having it chopped off. Notice Pedobear is present.
Image:Death_Train.JPG|The Chinese have trains now.
Image:All_look_same.jpg|The Chinese Council disapprove of your shenanigans. You better believe that'll result in a lower social credit score
Image:Edison-chen-09.jpg|Chinaman [[Edison Chen]] eating cunt, once his dick was removed by Gillian's teeth.
Image:Azian.jpg|Typical Chinese Beauty.
Image:Penis.jpg|Traditional Chinese toothbrush
Image:popstation.JPEG|China's amazing [[Fail|originality]].
File:Big shit.jpg
Image:ChineseSOB.png|Those Chinese sons of a bitches are going down.
Image:Forbid.jpg|Shut up.
Image:ChinasRedArmyFly2.jpg|Great Firewall of China...more like great faggotwall, amirite?
Image:TankManHacker.jpg|China's hackers on steroids can block tanks. Who knew?
Image:Gungagalunga.jpg|Even drunken louts can share in the wisdom of the Dali Lama.
Image:Soup_3.jpg|China is full of sick fucks.
Image:Chinese_fetus.jpg|China's so called "beautiful" culture.
Image:Chinese_execution.jpg|Example of the government benefits the Chinese can expect.
Image:Cunt_examination.jpg|Nice use of +1,000 year old Anglo-Saxon terminology.
Image:Skidknee.jpg|Azns are known to want it [[up the butt]].
Image:Wtfisthislee.jpg|Bruce Lee is not amused.
Image:Chinese_dude.jpg|OH, I SEE A COCK.
Image:Jimbo in red.jpg|The future of U.S.-China relations.
Image:China mad.jpg|Don't fuck with China.
Image:Chinese_babies.jpg|Space exploration propaganda, or solution to [[over_9000|massive population]]?
Image:China_segways.jpg|China's nerd patrol.
Image:Taiwan.jpg|Delicious Chinese food.
Image:Toy dead cat.jpg|The chinese [[hate|loooooooove]] cats.
Image:stonerchan.png|Stoner Chan, brother of Jackie Chan. Master of Stoner Kung Fu.
Image:China_-_Negotiations.jpg|Chinese hostage negotiator at work.
File:POTN China Wheelchair.jpg
File:ChinawomenridesPWC.jpg|Fucking white guys is a typical freetime actitvity of an average Chinawoman
File:Grocery_Gross_Dog_Heads.jpg|Typical Chinese cuisine.
File:Grocery_Gross_Tuna_Eye.jpg|How about some dessert?
File:ChinaGathersForUSDebt.jpg
File:Chinaownsyoubitch.jpg
File:Veryhotchinesechick.jpg|Very hot chinese chick
File:Anasianslut.gif
File:Kai-Lan.png|Your typical Chinese cartoon girl.
File:GookGirlTongTongWu.jpg|Typical Chinese woman named [[LOL|Tong Tong Wu]]
File:A young Chinese woman.jpg
File:JadeKush.jpg
</gallery>}}
 
==See Also==
*[[Anti-CNN]]
*[[Afghanistan]]
*[[Asia]]
*[[Azn]]
*[[Chyna]]
*[[China Guy]]
*[[Communism]]
*[[COVID-19]]
*[[Death Van]]
*[[Eingee.com]]
*[[India]]
*[[Indonesia]]
*[[Malaysia]]
*[[Singapore]]
*[[Human flesh search engine]]
*[[Japan]]
*[[Kazakhstan]]
*[[Mizhi County No. 3 Middle School Attack]]
*[[North Korea]]
*[[Olympic Flame]]
*[[Pakistan]]
*[[Russia]]
*[[Taiwan]]
*[[Tajikistan]]
*[[Tibet]]
*[[Vietnam]]
*[[Wang Jeu|Wang Jew]]

==External links==
*'''{{archive|jxQ4E|Chinese Habbo Hotel closed permanently thanks to AIDS.}}'''
*'''{{archive|l6CJR|Chinese sell couches labeled as nigger-brown.}}''' At last, a quality product.
*[https://www.wired.com/2010/04/google-china-and-censorship-a-wiredcom-faq/ '''Fired !'''] ''from Google - what did you expect, you honorable imperialist cunt ?''
*[https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0006QY4WS Ways that are dark.] A fine book on China from the 1930's. Available on Amazon, because I'm sure good people like you would never just find a free copy on the web.

{{azn}}
{{commonwealth}}
{{Takedown}}
{{Unitedstates}}
{{Qing}}

[[Category: Locations]]

File:Koreanwarchinks.jpg

2026-05-15T06:09:15Z

Gooksu:

Good Korea

2026-05-15T06:07:11Z

Gooksu:

{{Spoilers|SOUTH KOREA HATES SEOUL NOW AND THEY ARE MOVING THEIR CAPITAL TO SEJONG CITY IN 2030}}
{{breakingnews|[https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-67920167 South Korea BANS Dog Eeat]}}
[[File:SamsungcideBomber.jpg|right|thumb|Good Korea's main export]]
{{distinguish|Best Korea}}

'''Good Korea''' (or combined as one word is [[Gorea]]) is an American colony much like Puerto Rico. This is not ironic or in any way in line with ED, it's a just a fact missing from Wikipedia: South Korea is no more sovereign than Puerto Rico. Their army is directly under command of the American Army and their first president was an American Hawaiian military dictator.
Good Korea was one of the [[United States]]' 20th century acquisitions in accordance with the long-term [[Manifest Destiny]].

== Geography ==

Good Korea is immediately south of [[Best Korea]], on the bottom half of a peninsula that is west of [[Japan]]. It has water on both sides. It is a very convenient place for throwing things into [[Best Korea]]. It used to have some good surf beaches, but now they are rather untidy.

== People ==

[[Image:RaelKoreanBlackface.jpg|thumb|Sometimes uppity Koreans show support for the [[niggers]]]]
[[Image:SK military.jpg|thumb|Capitalist, why don't you feed your people?]]

South Koreans belong to a Conservative culture which respects traditional values. The typical South Korean belongs to some or another shady Baptist Church founded in California in the 50s. Since both men and women work long hours for one or another service corporation, and [[nazi|there are no immigrants]], they have more Mc Donalds per capita than any other country in the World, so they can enjoy their traditional food at any time prepared by robots. A dog market exists in Seoul to entertain tourists and help Animal Rights organizations whitewash money. South Korean men like to play golf in their spare time and get drunk with Single Malt Scotch, their traditional spirit. South Korean women like to repeatedly get plastic surgery in their eyelids. Children pass times include math, Starcraft, and studying English to purge themselves of their mother tongue before they are six. Korean girls have become ruthless [[feminist]] gold diggers who will only use the men for money then leave them to die off once they have outlived their usefulness. But despite being feminists Korean women crave the slightly bigger White cock or the [[lie|giant]] [[The Great Black Dick Hoax|Black Cock]] and are completely submissive to [[White]] and Black men.
{{center|{{frame|<youtube>Lf_sEGjC9_4</youtube><center>'''Typical Korean [[Christians]] harass people in public, and are often known as [[gay|gae]][[dog|doks.]]'''</center>}}}}
[[Image:halkas.jpg|thumb|Typical korean [[granny]]]]
[[Image:Dongduk.jpg|thumb|Typical Korean Feminists' Protest Method]]

== Government ==

Good Korea is a suzerain state of the USA, kind of an unincorporated territory. Every five years a new Governor is appointed by the United States Pacific Command. A Reality Show is broadcasted and fake elections are held in a farcical show of moral superiority to the People's Republic of Korea. The subjects are expected to pay for and take part in these celebrations.
Basic freedom of speech or demonstration are forbidden in Good Korea when it touches on political topics: the internalization of this prohibition into self-censorship is what makes them good in the first place.

== Occultism ==

South Korea's first female president and former symbolic first lady [[Wikipedia:Park Geun-hye|Park Geun-Hye]], who won the election through military interference, <s>is under [[Truth|investigation]]</s> [https://www.straitstimes.com/asia/east-asia/south-korea-ex-president-park-geun-hye-leaves-jail-for-medical-care LOL the capricious prostitute got 24 years] for conducting occult rituals and being linked to fortune teller [[Wikipedia:Choi Soon-sil|Choi Soon-sil]], her "shaman adviser" and rumored [[lesbian]] confidante who has been in Park's inner circle since 1994. Choi's father was the shamanistic cult leader [[Wikipedia:Choi Tae-min|Choi Tae-min]] of the Eternal World Religion, who told Park he could channel her dead mother [[Wikipedia:Yuk Young-soo|Yuk Young-soo]], who was assassinated in 1974 by a [[North Korea]]n sympathizer trying to shoot Park's father, South Korean military dictator [[Wikipedia:Park Chung-hee|Park Chung-hee]], who was assassinated in 1979 by the director of his security agency for failing to keep Choi away from his daughter Geun-Hye. From an office in the Non-Hyun [[Dong]] neighborhood, spirits told Choi Soon-sil that North Korea would soon collapse, Choi rewrote Park's speeches to be more shaman-y, she created some corrupt foundations, and Choi had a tablet with secret policy documents on it. On [[Halloween]] 2016, Choi Soon-sil said "I'm sorry. I committed a sin that deserves death." Park Geun-Hye said "it is not true that I am a cult follower and practised shamanistic rituals at the presidential Blue House." '''[[You]]''' can't make this shit up. Stick to [[Starcraft]] and [[Dota2]] South Korea. Currently, after Park Geun-hye, the worst president, [[Wikipedia:Moon Jae-in|Moon Jae-in]]{{Communist}}, the worst anti-American president, \politics like shit. The nickname in Korea is Moon Apocalypse. However, there is hope because all Koreans, With the exception of Moon Jae-in's fanatical supporters, most Koreans hate Moon Jae-in and the Korean opposition party, Power of the People, is in power. After 2022, [[Yoon Suk Yeol]] replaced the regime. After Yoon Suk Yeol was impeached, as of 2026, the president is Lee Jae-myung{{Communist}}.

[[Image:Leejaiming.jpg|thumb|As of 2026, the president of Korea is a puppet of China.]]

== Economy ==

You can make a lotta lotta money in Good Korea. Make sure your mutual funds and IRAs include Good Korean companies. If you can't get a job where you are despite owning a suit, you can be a highly paid English-speaking [[monkey]] to entertain their small children ([https://youtu.be/dXakC04KFz0?t=1391 but only if you're white]). Many Good Koreans might be confused because [[white people]] (like Alan Alda and Jamie Farr) look good in movies and [[you]] don't. But don't worry! They will never fire you no matter how fat, gross, diseased, and lazy you are. And don't forget, although [[Raelian|Raël]] may be [[Perma-ban|banned]] in Korea, he still needs your 10 percent.

Internationally, Good Korea releases [[MMORPG]]s for free, which are usually awful, even by MMORPG standards. Kids will actually pay for extra, useless features on this shit, which will normally make their character look more like a [[fag]] or [[weeaboo]]. The profit Good Korea makes on this faggotry is uncertain, though it could be over 20% of their economy.

[[Image:Japracist.jpg|thumb|Unlike [[Japan|this]] sign, this only exists in Japan and Taiwan.]]

Gorea is trying to take over the world by making and releasing free shitty gay TV Drama + K-poop featuring post-plastic-surgery pretty boys and girls, but no one gave a shit except for a few pathetic [[Koreaboo]]s in South East Asia.

==US Military in Good Korea==
If you are serving in the military, please take advantage of the many prostitutes that populate the red light district. Remember, <s>though: Koreans hate any and all United States soldiers, so avoid asking questions, unless you would like to contribute to the Korean national pastime (other than ''Starcraft''): Blankly staring and giggling.</s>
but after 2015 Now, thanks to the atrocities of China, I like the US and the US military.Good Koreans are famously hard workers.
It is a known fact that [[Cho Seung-Hui|a Korean cannot kill more than 33 people without killing him or herself.]]

== How to Troll Good Korea ==
* Tell them Korea owes all its Jew to their Japanese Masters.
* Call kimchi a kimuchi.
* Call anyone with [KOR] or [KR] in their IGNs a Kimchiman.
* Describe their country as a big factory
* Congratulate them on being the country that produces and consumes more steel per capita in the World! Segway casually to suicide rates.
* Point out that North Koreans don't have as many prostitute daughters and gamer and asperger sons because they are free to get daily fresh air, community exercise and don't live in a steel and concrete digital sweatshop.
* Point out that eating dog is a disgusting habit not merited by culture since North Koreans would rather starve than eat dog.
* [[shit nobody cares about|Tell them Dokdo belongs to japan.]]
* Make fun of ''Starcraft'' or any of the shitty MMORPGs or MMOFPS they dedicate their worthless lives on.
** Say that worker rushing sucks and only shows that they have a small dick.
* Tell them [[your mom|comfort women]] did 9/11.
* Tell them [[fact|Japan is better]].
* Tell them that their country has a rich, long history of being buttraped and under the control of other countries to such an extent that they have no distinct individual culture.
* Say hello to them on the streets. This will cause them to lock up into a giggling fit of fear.
* [[Fan death|Lock them in a room with a fan turned on because they seriously believe that stupid shit]].
* Be [[Kim Jong Il]].
* Remind them that a lot more so than Japan, South Korea is now America's bitch.
* Remind them that the only sovereign Korean country with its armed forces not directly under the command of a foreign power is the ''Democratic'' ''People's'' Republic of Korea, not their slave puppet state. If they don't remember tell them to just [http://www.globalresearch.ca/south-koreas-armed-forces-to-remain-fully-under-us-military-command/5410849 look it up]
* To add insult to injury, remind them that whereas Japan at least put up a fight before becoming America's butt buddy, South Korea bent over willingly to let America rape them.
** If they do it willingly, it's not rape. Then they're just being fags.
* Tell them that they're the only country in the world where going to the military for 2 years is the only way to become a man. Extra lulz if you mention that most of the time there is spent sucking their CO's cocks and doing their chores while they get $100 a month.
* For more lulz, mistake them for [[japs]].
* Inform an older Korean man that yes, there are gay Koreans.
* Tell them their national soccer team is shitty.
* Convince people Samsung is a Japanese company.
* Remind them that all their good looking women are a product of extensive plastic surgery.

== gallary ==

{{cg|South korea|Gallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Ugly south korean.png|thumb|Good Korea has to Face it: Their [[wimminz]] are ugly
File:Koreanfeminazi.jpg|thumb|Typical korean [[feminazi]] lulz
File:Typicalkoreafemi.jpg|typical [[korean]] feminazi 2
Image:856653883_e0b6ce3eef_o.jpg|thumb|300px|A typical pub in South Korea. Absolutely NOT related to the flag of Korea
Image:sweatshop.jpg|thumb|<s>Good Koreans are famously hard workers. This boy likes his job so much he'll work for less than a cent an hour!!</s> It's China
Image:Boiled alive dogs asians.jpg|thumb|Another reason why south Korea is inferior to [[North Korea|best one]]
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:ChineseCarryOut.jpg|Ancient traditional korean method of [[child abuse|transportation]]
Image:Koreanoparty.jpg|thumb|Looks like no one stuck around to clean up after the party
File:South korean ilustrator kidmos art .jpg|thumb|Korean [[Hentai]]
</gallery>}} 

== See also ==

* [[Johnny Somali]]
* [[Korean]] <s>stereotypes</s> [[fact|FACTS]]
* [[Sarah Jeong]]
* [[PSY]]
* [[Yoon Suk Yeol]]
* [[Squid Game]]
* [[BTS]]
* [[K-pop]]
* [[Chan Ho Park]]
* [[Woo Bum-kon]]

== External links ==

* [http://www.unwiredview.com/2012/04/20/south-korea-to-ban-cameraphone-shutter-sound-removers/# An example of the moral-faggotry endemic to South Korea.]
* [https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2023/5/17/pig-heads-bbqs-mosque-backlash-tests-s-korea-religious-freedom/# South koreans know how to handle sand nigger.]

== Korean evaluation ==

It's a little exaggerated, but some of it was funny lol.

{{Politics}}
{{Commonwealth}}
{{azn}}
{{Korea}}
{{timeline|Featured article December 28 & 29, [[2024]]|[[Ryan's World]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Hawk Tuah]]}}
[[Category:Countries]]

Gook

2026-05-15T06:05:45Z

Gooksu:

[[File:Gooks.png|thumb|]]
[[File:Korea.png|thumb|]]

[[File:Rapistgook.png|thumb|left|[[Japanese]] gooks, an entire race of child molesters.]]
[[Image:Those fucking gooks.jpg|thumb]]
[[File:AsianGooks.jpg|thumb]]
[[Image:Dougchink.jpg|thumb|Turning niggers into [[Asians]]? [[Double Nigger]].]]
{{offended}}


A '''Gook''' is a [[shit nobody cares about|derogatory term]] for any native yellowman of [[Vietnam|Southeast Asia]] or [[Korea]]. Gooks are best known for using [[Filipinos|Human Wave tactics]] in warfare, and owning restaurants serving the best [[Alisa Kuzmenko|"Hot Dog"]] in town. They differ from [[Chink|Chinks]], as chinks are Chinamen.
 
There are 3 main species of Gook:
*Northern Yellow (North Vietnamese or [[North Korea|North Korean]]): Looks [[Chinese]] basically. Hates [[Americans]] (i.e. Vietcong).
*Southern Brown: Dog-eating South Koreans or Southern Vietnamese Paddie Farmers. Also are shitty fighters (See ARVN). South vietnamese Will be routed easily in battle and immediately call for [[American]] support.
*American Brown (AKA Boat People): West Coast Refugee families. Have 10+ [[Wigger|Wannabe-Gangbanger Kids]] and drive a [[Toyota]] Previa.

<center>'''Clint Eastwood has been observed pwning gooks of all subspecies.'''</center>
<center><youtube>f9Tpw1ICJEc</youtube></center>

== [[learn to noun|Learn to Gook]] ==



Northern Gook is a [[moonspeak|complex language]] consisting of using 100 ching-chong [[moonspeak]] syllables to make 1 sentence, while the written language involves many [[redundant|circles and lines]] such as these:
*하얀 악마
*내가 당신을 죽일거야
*나 너무 흥분돼
Alternatively, Southern Gook takes the form of [[engrish|malign assbabble]] with squigglies above the letters:
*tôi rất đánh thức
*trắng uy hiếp
*con sóng chiến thuật

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
File:Sommer.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

==See Also==
*[[Asia]]
*[[Jap]]
*[[Chink]]
*[[Vietnam]]
*[[Phillipines]]
*[[McCain]]
 
:{{stub}}
{{race}}
{{Azn}}
{{timeline|Featured article February 21 & 22, [[2025]]|[[Texas]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Homeless]]}}

Gook

2026-05-15T06:04:58Z

Gooksu:

[[File:Gooks.png|thumb|]]
[[File:Korea.png|thumb|]]

[[File:Rapistgook.png|thumb|left|[[Japanese]] gooks, an entire race of child molesters.]]
[[Image:Those fucking gooks.jpg|thumb]]
[[File:AsianGooks.jpg|thumb]]
[[Image:Dougchink.jpg|thumb|Turning niggers into [[Asians]]? [[Double Nigger]].]]
{{offended}}


A '''Gook''' is a [[shit nobody cares about|derogatory term]] for any native yellowman of [[Vietnam|Southeast Asia]] or [[Korea]]. Gooks are best known for using [[Filipinos|Human Wave tactics]] South vietnamese is in warfare, and owning restaurants serving the best [[Alisa Kuzmenko|"Hot Dog"]] in town. They differ from [[Chink|Chinks]], as chinks are Chinamen.
 
There are 3 main species of Gook:
*Northern Yellow (North Vietnamese or [[North Korea|North Korean]]): Looks [[Chinese]] basically. Hates [[Americans]] (i.e. Vietcong).
*Southern Brown: Dog-eating South Koreans or Southern Vietnamese Paddie Farmers. Also are shitty fighters (See ARVN). Will be routed easily in battle and immediately call for [[American]] support.
*American Brown (AKA Boat People): West Coast Refugee families. Have 10+ [[Wigger|Wannabe-Gangbanger Kids]] and drive a [[Toyota]] Previa.

<center>'''Clint Eastwood has been observed pwning gooks of all subspecies.'''</center>
<center><youtube>f9Tpw1ICJEc</youtube></center>

== [[learn to noun|Learn to Gook]] ==



Northern Gook is a [[moonspeak|complex language]] consisting of using 100 ching-chong [[moonspeak]] syllables to make 1 sentence, while the written language involves many [[redundant|circles and lines]] such as these:
*하얀 악마
*내가 당신을 죽일거야
*나 너무 흥분돼
Alternatively, Southern Gook takes the form of [[engrish|malign assbabble]] with squigglies above the letters:
*tôi rất đánh thức
*trắng uy hiếp
*con sóng chiến thuật

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
File:Sommer.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

==See Also==
*[[Asia]]
*[[Jap]]
*[[Chink]]
*[[Vietnam]]
*[[Phillipines]]
*[[McCain]]
 
:{{stub}}
{{race}}
{{Azn}}
{{timeline|Featured article February 21 & 22, [[2025]]|[[Texas]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Homeless]]}}

Philippines

2026-05-15T06:03:53Z

Gooksu: /* Filipinos Today */

{{Watch}}
{{Offended}}
{{Spics}}
'''The Republic of the Failippines''', also known as ''Pedo Heaven'', ''Nannyland'', ''Loli Land'' or the ''[[Soviet Canuckistan]] Of Asia or Little Mexico'' is a nation of some [[Over 9000|9,001]] islands located in the Pacific Ocean, not far from [[China]]. The people of the Philippines, known as Filipinos (aka ''Flips'') and even ''[[Canuck]]s'' by some Asians because they're [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isniPiAbno0 so nice] and they speak [[English]] are best known for their overseas service as cafeteria personnel, mini-mart clerks, hotel maids, and [[women|biological female]] and [[transvestite]] [[prostitutes]] in countries around the world. The Philippines itself is a hotspot for gold diggers and [[pedophilia]], as well as for a few [[Azn]] "[[Al Qaeda]]" wannabes who have "taken over" some small villages on one of the islands. It is also the world's largest exporter of large yellow-ish envelopes, known everywhere as "Manila envelopes."

[[File:Duterte.jpg|thumb|[[Rodrigo Duterte|The '''new''' dictator of the Philippines.]] Reports say his death squads kill [[fact|36 people a day]]. That's what you get for smoking weed.]]
[[File:PImap.jpg|thumb|left]]
[[File:The-nutshack logo.jpg|thumb|http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h6ljqaWdR3A What Filipinos watch everyday.]]
[[File:Pigirl.jpg|thumb|[[Angel Locsin]]'s early career]]
[[File:Typical Coconut Niggers.png|thumb|Contrary to what the Coconut Niggers believe,The Philippines has been the world's [[Weak|punching bag]], getting pwned by the [[Spain|Spaniards]],the [[Jewnited States of Americunts|Americans]],and the [[Japan|Japanese]].]]

==[[old|History]]==
[[File:Naildown.jpg|thumb|Easter festivities]]
[[File:Fidgets.JPG|thumb|Are usually called "Fidgets."]]
[[File:Bath.jpg|thumb|The US takeover in 1898 opened a golden age of sex tourism and pedophilia]]
[[File:Balut.jpg|thumb|Delicious balut, unhatched raw baby duckling]]
[[File:Dogmeat_philippines2.jpg|thumb|A brown dog is fine too.]]

The Philippine Islands (AKA Philipenis Islands) were discovered in 1521 by [[Portugal|Portuguese]]/[[Spain|Spanish]] explorer Ferdinand Magellan, who was taking his yacht on history's first round-the-world cruise. After dropping anchor near a scenic beach on the main island and going ashore for a look around, Magellan and his crew were surprised not to find any other humans. There were, however, great numbers of a curious and friendly ape species, which followed the explorers in their sight-seeing tour around the island. By the end of the first day, when Magellan and his men established a campsite and prepared for bed, quite a few of the female apes indicated a desire to cuddle under the covers with the men.

Naturally, these advances met with a mixed reception. In four years of hard sailing, most of the Spaniards were [[Gay|confirmed bachelors]], and the notion of physical contact with females of any species was somewhat terrifying. Some of the men, however, still abide by the letter and spirit of Imperial Rome's ancient motto, "''Quicumque Permoveo''" ([[Bisexual|"Anything that Moves"]]), and since the female apes looked a bit better than some of the [[Negro|negresses]] they had seen in Africa, they were willing to give these bitches a hard ride. In due course, after only a few weeks gestation, the female apes gave birth to a new, hybrid species of Filipino ape-human. Thus, the "[[Canada]] of Asia" was born.

Other Spanish explorers followed. In 1898, however, the [[United States]] claimed the islands, since they were at war with [[Spain]] about an entirely different topic, [[Cuba]], on the other side of the world, and realized that claiming the Philippines would completely baffle and confuse the Spaniards. When World War 2 came along, it was [[Japan]]'s turn to invade and totally freak out the USA, first by forcing all the US soldiers to jog around the Bataan High School track 100 times in full gear (this is jokingly remembered on the History Channel as the [[i did it for the lulz|"Bataan Death March"]]), and then by kicking their asses in an archery competition. The Philippines evokes bitter memories indeed for the US military, which can be considered extremely [[Lulz|lulzy]].

Not wanting to dwell on the past, much less be liable for an overpopulated clump of shitty islands, the [[United States]] granted the Philippines a status somewhat like [[Puerto Rico]] in 1946.

Four hundred years of successful interbreeding with Spaniards, Chinese merchants, US military personnel and Japanese sex tourists has led to a race that is generally presentable in the human society but can not be considered attractive by any means. There are, as well, quite a few characteristics of Filipino culture that remind intelligent observers of their origins.

In [[[2016]], [[Rodrigo Duterte]] seized control of the country and created right wing death squads to exterminate all drug addicts. Thousands of fags have been [[pwn|pwn'd]] by now. Population control is population control.

==Language aka #TagalogMasterRace==

The official language of the Philippines is called Tagalog. (because fuck Cebuano and others right?). Linguistically, Tagalog is <strike>a blend</strike> THE BASTARD CHILD of ancestral ape noises, Spanish and English. The typical Tagalog conversation sounds like barnyard chickens talking, with bits of European language mixed in for flavor. It is because of this "chicken" aspect that Tagalog is also known as "Buk-buk." Indeed, sometimes the Filipinos themselves are known as "Buk-buks" or even "Book-books." Philippine [[media]], newspapers, television and even [http://tl.wikipedia.org/wiki/Estados_Unidos Philippine Wikipedia] use this bizarre combination in an attempt to convey meaning. As employees, Filipinos are required to learn and use only the language of the host country, as use of the Tagalog language frequently irritates local dogs and cats, who switch into hunting mode when they hear it.

The most common greeting in Tagalog is "hi-ho, bangalongabingbang;" it can be broken down like so: "hi ho, bang a long a bing bang." Make sure that you enunciate this as much as possible, as if you were to speak it in a limp-tongued, slightly-nasally fashion, it would sound like everything else does in Tagalog, from "I sure wish that I had the class and shoe collection of Imelda Marcos" to "Don't you think you guys would be safer if we sent more Marines here?"

To increase the likelihood of being raped by white people, the usage of English language as a medium of instruction has been mandatory in schools [[at least 100 years ago]]. This was also done to turn all Filipinos into call center agents. This only proves true that you need to learn English to survive.

==Religion==
[[File:Nailed.jpg|thumb|Funner than it looks]]

Because [[Spain]] owned the place for so long, nearly all Filipinos are [[Catholic]]. Like all nations with a Catholic majority [[Jesus|Christmas]] is the biggest holiday of the year followed by [[Easter]] wherein the natives prepare all year for the Holy Week activities, of which the most important are re-enactments of the [[Satan|Crucifixion]]. [[Fetish|Men carry huge crosses, whip themselves to a bloody pulp, and have themselves nailed to the cross.]] It a delightful and picturesque spectacle for the tourists, and is all in the spirit of [[Ogrish|family entertainment]].

There is also an increasingly larger number of [[mormon]] cultists and their temples as they are somewhat revered by the coconut nigger much like they are by the [[hawaii|pineapple niggers]].

==Cuisine==
Filipino cuisine is an oxymoron as after eating eat anything cooked by the English actually tastes good. You never see any Filipino [[Fast Food|restaurants]] around the world except for a few to service the local Filipino communities. The reason is it's truly one of the worst foods on the planet. Maybe only [[Australia|Australian Aboriginals]] and some remote [[Black People|African]] tribes might eat worse shit than this. Filipino food typically uses the following spices and additives but not much else; sugar (lots), salt, vinegar, Soy sauce and MSG.

Surprisingly, most Filipino cuisine is very much as it was more than 400 years ago, before the first human contact. For example, one of the most important foods is called "balut," which is the unhatched, not quite fully-formed embryo of a duck, EATEN STRAIGHT from the egg. In pre-contact days, the native apes would eat the feathered embryo of any kind of bird, including seagull and pelican, but the recent focus on duck eggs is evidence of civilization's advance. Other delicacies include "pork in blood" (raw cubes of pork in congealed pig blood), "bagoong" (fermented, somewhat mouldy catfish, eaten raw with the fingers), and "black dog" (basically, if your pet black dog goes missing, go knock on the door of Mr. Macadangdang's house).

==ILOVEYOU SCANDAL==
Peenoise are so Alienated to Technology that Entrusting them of using it would result in a Catastrophic Level. In the year [[Y2K|2000]], a man named O'Neal (not a nigger) made a Computer Gayware that was programmed to Annihilate all synthetic life on Earth, started it's life as a VBS script Designed to make all the Vibrators in the world Self-Aware. Being Bleeding Edge at that time the Creator of the Worm decided to share it to his unsuspecting Kike Imperialist thus resulting in a Catastrophic Event known as the Melissa Worm.

Although the Worm was sent to only 500 Kikes and Peenoise the resulting Aftermath on the Creator was Complete Bullshit as the Philipian Constitution never had any Law against writing Malware thus making the Scandal a joke to MicroCock and Bill Jobs. Not only the Shittiest Island on the planet is filled with Pedos and Retarded Kike Vets but also a place for Antipathetic Cybercriminals with very little Empathy for Old People.

== Shady Economy ==
In the shortest way to sum it up, think of this as the Asian version of Canada [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9N3kufjmic on October 17, 2018] but with less drugs. But for a more detailed look:

Since most Filipinos still live like in the stone age and are [[Goronchev|intellectually checkmated]] by let's say...a [[Redundant|6 year old aspie]], technical advancement and industrial development are impossible. Therefore, the country has specialized in Gold digging and generally being a heaven for [[Pedo|pedophiles]] (reliable sources state, that at least [[Over_9000|150%]] of Filipino children are involved in [[sex]] tourism). A typical sight in the Philippines are [[Lulz|child sex camps]], where innocent men, mainly from western Europe and North America, are forced to have sex with multiple [[Loli|underaged girls]] and then made to pay for it. Although local authorities claim to be investigating this case, the victims remain fundless and stripped of their basic human dignity due to the hours-long [[rape]] perpetrated by the minors. Recently, famous internet hero and closet pedo, [[Chris Hansen]], together with a UNESCO squad visited one of these infamous camps, taking the children out of the milieu. The minors were very happy to be jobless now and starving on the streets once again. But, in the bright side, the jobless children are given yet another chance to have money and at the same time entertain horny pedo tourists. Go see unlicensed bars and you'll see. Its pedo haven at its finest.

Distribution of [[Cp|videos depicting the minors raping the elderly men]] is forbidden, since it is UNESCO evidence, but can be still demanded [http://www.fbi.gov here] for free.

Many internet dating websites are packed to the brim with fake scam profiles placed by Filipino scum who are very eager to link you to a shady camwhore site that will steal your credit card info, or beg you for money because they or their relatives are ill, etc. They will lie that they live near you, but they are too fucking retarded to hide their IP address when talking to you on MSN or Yahoo, so it's easy to sniff out the Filipino rodent stench. The internet would be a better place if the Philippines was completely IP banned.

The [[Asking for it|Age of Consent]] in The Philippines is [[12|pedophile]]. So fuck away, bitches.

<center><youtube>LVeIMtpPxSw</youtube></center>

==[[kung_fu|Martial]] [[lol|LoL]] years and the Great Shindig Party==

In September 21, 1972, president Ferdinand Marcos declared [[kung_fu|martial]] [[lol|law]] in an effort to [[raep|"save"]] the nation from [[Bawwwww|whining]] and bitching left/right retards and students who had resorted to [[trolling|violence]]. It went well for the better during the first few months(like crime rate had dropped significantly), however its [[nigger|true color]] came out in the open as people accusing Marcos of [[charlie_sheen|winning]] and [[hacking|power-grabbing]] were sent to <s>Soviet-style gulags</s> Philippine Jail to be [[stick_it_in_her_pooper|ass-whacked]] and had their tight pussies [[fisted|adjusted]] by the military. Marcos also [[delete_fucking_everything|re-drafted]] the constitution in January 1973, rendering the judiciary/legislature departments as a bowl of puke and shit, ergo giving Marcos [[BDSM|Absolute power]] over his nation.

President Marcos also [[pwned]] [[all_your_base_are_belong_to_us|all companies belonging to the opposition]] and gave them to his [[bitches|money-sucking leeches]] called '''jabronies''', whom they loved to give curry favors to the prez in exchange for [[BDSM|hard sex]]. Marcos also fucked up the economy under Mount Everest-esque debt and his Dinero were transferred to Sweetzerland using different names.

It seemed that everything was fine on the next 11 years of [[cocksucking]], not until his exiled arch-enemy [[fag|Benigno "Ninoy" Aquino, Jr.]] decided to go back to the Philippines to tell the [[dick|dictator]] to [[tits_or_gtfo|GTFO]] of Malaca'ang for he also itched to sit his butt onto the Philippine Golden Seat of Power. Marcos said "[[O_rly|Suit yourself]]" to the former senator and then sent several of his tr00ps to the Manila International Airport (which later renamed in his honor, but who cares??) to pose as escorts to Mr. Aquino. Aboard the China Airlines jet, the guards boarded the plane to escort Aquino. Instead of the faggy flower-wreath giving and reciting "Mabuhay! Welcome to the Philippines" to Aquino, the soldiers shouted "PUSILA!" (Tagalog for "let's fist 'em up!") and Aquino fell dead face-first on the tarmac.

The perpz sang to the media that Rolando Galman, the other man [[fisted|shot]] along with Aquino, was the REAL SHOOTAH and soldiers [[killed]] him with gunfire after the latter's brains spilled the tarmac; but [[noone]] believed in that [[shit]] and Galman was just a [[Pwned|cannon-fodder]] to cover up the conspiracy brewed up by Marcos' generals.

However, Marcos realized that he had made a fucking mistake, for everyone knows that Aquino is the nation's favorite son and the Filipinos were sick-to-the-bone of being [[List_of_sex_moves|skull-fucked]] by Marcos for 11 years. Fueled by RAAGGEEE and longing to be unchained from the [[fascist]] [[faggotry]], they swarmed Aquino's funeral and called for his [[kitchen|coffee-making]] housewife [[slut|Corazon Aquino]] as a standard bearer of the opposition.

In February 7, 1986, Marcos called the shots and a snap election was held between him and [[slut|Mrs. Aquino]]. He was declared the [[winning|victor]], but those on the opposition camp smelled something [[lulzy]] with the election system. The last straw came forth upon learning that the results had been rigged in favor of Marcos, thus they went outside of the campaign HQ to take a shit and vomit, but never returned.

The electoral stench pervaded the air until Marcos' top henchmen Juan Ponce Enrile (his defense minister and the brains behind [[kung_fu|martial]] [[lulz]]) and Fidel V. Ramos (Marcos' cousin and a military butt-bastard baby) asked their commander-in-chief to let them take a [[shit|dump]]; however the toilet within Camp Aguinaldo was out of order for [[at least 100]] years, so they excused themselves to the next-door camp, Camp Crame.

Marcos gave them the OK, but [[facepalmed]] when he learned that he was fibbed by the two, and they had some kind of a conspiracy or some shit to pry Marcos out of the Seat of Power, which he had super-glued himself to it with The Law. He then called out the military to bring out their best wheels and fireworks to show his defectors [[The_Man|NOT TO FUCK UP WITH THE BIG BOSS.]]

As the Blingees and the Chromees came rolling to EDSA, an avenue where the both camps were located, the church asked the people to go to EDSA for a street dance showdown with Marcos' turtle-shell cavalry. Marcos, to prove that he is not a pussy-wimp, sent a chopper with military men and flew to where Enrile and Ramos smoking [[Cocaine|crack]] to beat the shit out of them and/or [[Kill_it_with_fire|kill them with fire]], because he wanted them to go back to choreograph his dance moves. Tensions were high over EDSA, knowing that this might be the last dance of their lives. However, the tables had turned as the guys aboard the chopper, instead of [[fisting]] them with bullets or [[Kill_it_with_fire|kill them with fire]], gave the two the high-five and set up the bong the soldiers brought themselves. And lettsss get the paaaarty started!!!!! The soldiers danced and shimmied with the crowd to the hip tunes, and then they pointed their guns away from Crame to Malaca'ang.

The [[butthurt]] Marcos realized that this was [[serious business]], so he hollllah'd [[Americunts|Uncle Sam]] for a plane, telling him to "HURRY THE FUCK UP!!!" as throngs of frenzied crowd were moving fast armed with sticks, Molotov cocktails, dildoes and vibrators. The plane came in at the last second, actually picoseconds from being mugged, raped, mutilated, and be hanged at the Rizal Park with his [[mom]]'s panties stuffed into his mouth.

After which, the former [[in_the_kitchen|coffee-maker]] [[slut|Corazon Aquino]] was sworn in as the new prezzie, and she continued to serve espresso and chocolatte amongst the Filipino people for the next six years of her rule.

As for Marcos, he told the US Marine pilot to take him to Paoay, his [[hick]] of a hometown north of Luzon. The pilot, having no shit of a idea where the fuck Paoay is, misinterpreted the instruction and instead he was flown to Hawaii. He had no choice, but to play the uke while his mistress Imelda did the hula [[dance]] in her 30-thousand dollar shoe for the next three years of his life.

[[tl;dr]] Never underestimate the power of [[kitchen|coffee]] -- and [[cock|bong pipe]] [[slut|smoke]]. Peace.

==Filipinos Today==

Filipinos or [[penis|Filipenis]], how ever you want to call them, are the [[human]] scum of the world, they like to think that they're patriotic, nationalistic, and all that shit, but in reality faggot Filipino boys have grown fond of the nigger culture and have become in a sense, second class niggers or as an actual insult: "Asian niggers".

It is also a known fact that Filipinos are the ugliest race in the entire earth (yes even uglier then the French) and that their men and women have the smallest [[penis|PENIS]]es and [[Tits|MELONS]] in the world. There are established Filipino communities especially on the west coast, where the men rape young girls and the old women kick fresh rhymes along with the boys. Also, they have dog feasts where they steal all the neighborhood dogs and have a cookout. The president of the [[internets]] [[Ron Paul]] says he wished all Filipinos would become an hero.

Filipino Women specialize on gold digging, they are very fond of marrying some [[Lemonparty|old man]] in order to get out of their shitty islands. Then, as expected, they divorce him and take half his earnings. Some women want to get a foreign husband just to interbreed, because they instinctively know how very much superior every other race is (Including niggers).

The [[penis|Filipenis]] people feel at ease knowing that everyone [[raped]] them and everyone invaded their pathetic little islands that they call home. Somehow, some of them escaped their shitty rat infested islands to live in a more civilized place like California, Australia and UK, where they go there, they buy a shitty ricer, put some shitty amps and roll on the streets acting like they're some pindick [[Fag|faggot]] gangster, they live a [[Loser|sad]] and a pathetic life, which is totally [[lulzy]] just watching them try hard to get socially accepted, talk about inferiority complex. Which in turn means they end up sucking off every fucking dirty black person they know or just becoming [[Anhero|an hero]].

The current government of the Philippines is run by a [[gay|very]] [[virgin]] president known for chain-smoking, driving fast cars and dating [[Lie|hot women]]. The government is best known for its corruption (after Laos and Indonesia) and [[Woman|womanizing]] of most of the political staff. (The latest anomaly with the armed forces which they ran off with millions of pesos worth of lost funds, and that led to the [[An_Hero|An Heroism]] of one of the accused generals). Filipinos are dumb fucks who love voting for celebrities, even if said celebrities don't know shit about running their own lives, much less a whole country. Anyone can be a president, ex-convicts who were [[Surprise_sex|reaped]] by [[Loli|lolis]], currently jailed politicians [[murder|who are pretty cool guys and doesnt afraid of anything]], heck even the dead porn star who was [[Surprise_buttsecks|reaped in the butt]] by a female fidget who [[Self Injury|broke her neck]] and is currently [[Party_van|in deep shit]].

Due to the fact that Filipinos were raped by [[Latin|Spanish Catholics]], they have the ability to swim long distances. The are arguably better swimmers than [[Cuba|Cubans]]. Filipinos are coconut niggers or Asian [[Brazil|Multiniggers]] but were once Sea Niggers. Sea Niggers are the baseline austronesian scum that lived in the [[Shit|Malay Archipelago]] and if you mix them with East African Niggers and Sandniggers, you get Indonesians and Malaysians, Shoreniggers, [[Star Wars|Coastal Defender Stormniggers]] or Palm Oil Niggers. However, Filipinos were mixed with East Asians and Spaniards, so they became the Coconut Niggers.

[[penis|Filipenis]] [[Bullshit|hard gangster thugs]] regularly hang around together at various 7-11 shops. Funny enough, they will ALWAYS chicken out in a fight one on one, but even bashing two or three of their midget buddies at the same time, wouldn't pose a problem to any [[White_people|individual from the superior race]].

You can identify [[penis|Filipenis]] by the way they look. If they are short, ugly as fuck, have ugly flat noses and smell like trash (well, some [[penis|Filipenis]] have better scents), that's them. Apparently, some of them even keep their perfumes in their buttholes, to keep it away from drunk, homosexual, and smelly Filipinos.

The [[fail|Failipinos]] are also hailed the worst and the most [[retarded]] [[motorcycle]] riders in the world. About 7 out of 10 vehicular accidents in Metro Manila are caused by Valentino Rossi-wannabes swerving through traffic at 200 kilometers per hour while drunk (and note that they never wear their helmets while doing the suicidal, asinine ride to death -- and they keep them on their elbows!!)

Everyone has raped the [[penis|Filipenis]] and everyone living there is proud of it, including [[your mom]]. The Philippine people have had the chance to reproduce with those who invaded their [[Shit_nobody_cares_about|little islands]], but since the Philippine people are fucking ugly as shit, some of the invaders chose their [[Masturbation|hand]] before fucking a half midget-ape hairy monster, also known as the [[Ugly|Philippine woman]]. This lead to the revolt of some of the invaders desperate troops, which opposed [[Typing_with_one_hand|the hand]], thus wasting their [[White_people|superior white genes]] to an [[You|inferior race]]. All sorts of races have interbred with the Philippine people, these include [[white people]], <s>[[beaners]]</s>, [[Chinks]], [[Japs]], [[Gooks]], spaniards, black person etc. It is also alleged by the locals, that the interbred of such races with their own will produce somewhat <s>pretty</s> nicer babies, but still miles behind the Japanese. A good example of this interracial breeding is former [[loli]] [[Vanessa Hudgens]] which is half Filipino and half [[Caucasian]].

==Filipinos: [[Azn|Asian]] or [[Aboriginal|Pacific Islander]]?==

Due to massive [[inbreeding]] and a lack of an [[school|education]], many Flips, especially those in [[America]], [[retard|believe that they are not Asian, but Pacific Islander.]] Some attribute this to the Failpinos wanting to have to avoid the typical Azn [[truth|stereotypes, such as small dicks and bad driving skills]], while others believe this is a way for the Pinoys to feel [[stupid|exotic]]. Flips like these tend to use several explanations to defend their claim to using the Islander title, like the ones listed below. Along with these are comebacks that can be used against them.

===Typical Explanations Used by Wannabe Islanders, and How to Refute Them===

*'''"The Philippines is located in the Pacific Ocean, which makes us Pacific Islanders!"'''
*''Tell them that this would make an Azn nation like [[Japan]] Pacific Islander. Also tell them that the Philippines is an archipelago, not an island.

*'''"Our language, Tagalog, is of the same language family (Austronesian) as that of the Hawaiians, Samoans, Tongans, etc., meaning we are the same race as them!"
*''Tell them that by their logic, this would make the Indians and Sri Lankans (who are South Asian) that speak languages such as Hindi and Sinhalese (which are Indo-European) the same race as the Europeans who speak languages like Spanish, English, German, etc., which are also Indo-European.

*'''"Us Filipinos do not look Asian because we have brown skin and do not have squint eyes like the Chinese/Japanese/etc., which makes us similar to the Samoans, Tongans, Maoris, etc. in the Pacific!"
*''Tell them to compare a picture of a Filipino (such as Manny Pacquiao) with a picture of an actual Pacific Islander (like rugby player Jonah Lomu). Ask them how these two look similar in any way.

==The Interwebs==
[[File:Dongtattoo.jpg|thumb|Typical pinoy gangsta]]
As for on teh internets (much like how monkeys were sent into space, these guys were given computers for the lulz), a typical Failipino can be identified by the following traits:

* inquiring upon everyone they meet; "do u have cam or msn"
* never capitalizing at the start of sentences. evar.
* passing off Engrish as proper English. they'll also mix their own dialect in there somewhere because they have about as much mastery of the English language as a brick.
* overusing ":)" faces, especially when there is absolutely nothing to smile about. Or basically, emoticons EVERYWHERE. :)
* ending sentences with either "...." or "!"! ...:)
* using the words "asddsa" or "wew" for no apparent reason. :)
* ending the sentence with "More power to ''X'' ".:)
* and most disturbingly... for typing strings of manic laughter... hahahahaha! hehehehe.... :)

== Jejemon ==
[[Image:Jeje2.jpg|thumb|right|gotta catch em all! jejemon!]]
[[Image:Jeje1.jpg|thumb|right|Million dorrah question!]]

This shows how texting, watching [[animu]], and the internetzzzz spoil todays' youth. This Failipinos' sub-culture is a mixture of Neanderthal man, azn Niggah, a [[Retard|fucktarded]] ghetto emokid, [[Mudkip|Pokemon piss]], and various [[Internet_disease|internet diseases]]. They luuvvv sending SMS messages using UNNECESSARILY LONG CHARACTERS meant to [[rape]] your eyes till you cry. (see examples below) These are the most retarded users of the ever-confusing [[1337|1337speak]] in the world, EVAR!!!! It also had created epic lulz on the internetherworld and the SMS world, and even the Philippine Department of Education gave the [[banhammer]] against these retards to spare your kids from further degeneration.

Examples of jejespeak:

* i wuD LLyK tO knOw moR3 bOut u. - I'd like to take you to a brothel and rape you in the ass bitch
* E33HhoWwZZZ pfHoE - go fuck yourself nigga
* lAbqCkyOuHh - shut the fuck up and hand me the weedzzz

[[Image:Jeje3.jpg|thumb|left|Azn gangstahs, the Jejemon]]

JejeFucks are known to wear oversized tee-shirts, a stupid rainbow cap, and they use a cellphone that could accommodate [[over 9000]] characters just to say 'Hi" to their fellow 7373pHuxxx. They defy curfew, roaming the streets from 10 pm to 4 am, and you can see them spamming the [[Failbook]] pages with their retarded leetspeak. Their favorite hang-outs include billard halls, shopping malls, Starbucks, Internet shops (known as DoWThAhANN, fuck that), ghetto streets, video arcades and police detention cells.

People who totally loathe the jejeFucks are called "Jejebusters", and will not hesitate to butt-rape them for their faggotry till kingdumb come. It should be noted also that the typical JejeFuck are mostly [[13-year old boys]], [[16-year-old girls]], and 60-year old [[pedofags]] with an IQ of -5,000

==Filipino Instincts==

Filipinos usually like to go [[batshit insane]] and argue with anyone who compliments or insults anyone Filipino, or their masters that they suck off. If you try to explain anything, even politely, they will take it as insults and act like little whiny-pussies even more. They often like to make fun of Viets, Chinese people (or anyone who isn't from the Tagalog-speaking region) and compare themselves to their neighboring countries. Once they feel threatened verbally, they will suck white cock for insults since their women already sucked white cock, Chinese cock, Malay cock, Spanish cock, and Japanese cock for hundreds of years resulting in the fucktarded, ugly-ass, ashamed, homosexual Failipinos we <s>see today</s> have to deal with today.

== Hobbies of typical Filipinos ==
[[File:Typical islandnigger transportation.jpg|thumb|Typical pinoy transportation]]
[[File:Phillipinos hate obama.jpg|thumb|Jejefags burning an effigy of the [[God-Emperor of Blackkind]]. ]]
* Eating dogs
* Love getting the Catholic church to fuck them around.
* Being hypocritical moralfags.
* Acting like second-rate wannabe azn Niggazzzz mumbling rap-shit on the streets
* Raping balding, middle-aged men (especially true for the minors)
* Working overseas
* [[nazi|Worshiping white people]]
* Playing DOTA <s>while having sex.</s> while fapping of low-tier shitty porn sites like youporn.
* Spending 95% of their time texting/sexting til' their fingers bleed
* Spending 95% of their lives on Failbook and Farmville
* Watching Fliptop on JewTube, where failipino nigazz hurl [[fail|terribad]] rap lyrics amongst themselves.
* Getting batshit insane over shitty K-pop songs.
* Smoke belching
* Peeing on walls, streets, car tires.
* Believing in superstitious bullshit that even their own religion/science/common knowledge has debunked.
* Playing basketball
* Voting for celebrities and candidates endorsed by celebrities in politics, no matter how retarded or inexperienced they are.
* Being [[Internet Tough Guy|Internet Tough Guys]] online
* Sucking the cock of anyone with money, including filthy [[Arab]]s and [[white]] people.
* Watching legal [[loli]]/[[shota]] porn during primetime......well in all seriousness, not exactly porn but when you feature kids in either half naked/in skimpy outfits worn only by someone working in a strip club on live television and dramas and put them in blunt jailbait situations (I.E: Sexy dancing, running around in their underwear....etc), it's close enough.
* Smoking on your food.
* Producing shitloads of kids and whore them to tourists for easy money. That, or getting scammed out of their kids because most Filipinos have no common sense and will do anything for money.
* Having sex with bedposts in order to stretch their vaginas.
* Squat sitting EVERYWHERE, even though there are chairs 5 feet away
* Being drug mules and failing at it
* Being selfish little corrupted trolls.
* Being terrible sailors by either sinking their own vessels due to outright stupidity or being terrible navigators.
* [http://www.cracked.com/article_18809_the-6-most-strangely-convincing-real-life-curses_p2.html Killing karaoke singers]
* [http://www.demotix.com/news/55425/horse-fighting-philippines#media-57029 Having horses fight to the death.]



== Fidgets in Action ==

...one day the great DingDong came from outerspace to sprout the machine gun wielding trex of the 20th dimension. Not knowing the potential fight that would ensued he conquered the world with his magical fingaling to sprout the masterful demise of what they call the Anakabu

<center><youtube>eqh5O9LbjhY</youtube></center>

== The Filipino hero has spoken ==

Everyone is wondering why Pacquiao always win the battle.The secret is revealed

<center><youtube>1lYj7Eo7bj8</youtube></center>

== Prisons ==

In Filipino prisons, not only are all the inmates gay, but also they put together lavish Michael Jackson Fan Club celebrations.

<center><youtube>hMnk7lh9M3o</youtube></center>

Also, they were forced to do this by the warden, who also tattoos his name on the female inmates. Does it add to the lulz? Fuck yes.

== Filipino Girls ==

Filipino girls usually have a really lovely voice. 

Not related but must be said, if you join the Military and get stationed in the Philippines you will be wise to keep a minimum of [[at least 100]] miles between your girlfriends. If you want to be sitting at a bar with with one of your bitches and find an [[knife|ice pick]] in your kidney or get your face cut to shit with a straight razor while one of your other bitches is screeching like a howler monkey, keep all your bitches in the same city. 
Since Filipino girls are more [[Beaner]] than [[Azn|Asian]] they will fuck [[nigger|black men]]. This is why the Philippines are a popular station for blacks in the military.

<center><youtube>rf8k3IYL7os</youtube></center>

==How To Tell If A Filipino Is Living Somewhere Near You==

*Has your cat gone missing?
*Were you walking your dog and when you turned back from watching that chick with the big tits jog down the street did your dog magically disappear off its leash?
*Have indigenous mammals like squirrels, racoons or even coyotes suddenly disappeared?
*How about birds, even pigeons?
*Have you seen someone collecting and bagging roadkill that doesn't work for the state? If you're from West Virginia disregard this question.
*Are all the ponds near your house surprisingly fished out?
*When you go to a river or lake do you see someone netfishing early in the morning or late at night?
*When you're driving around, is there that one house that always smells like a dumpster after the rain on a hot day?
*Has it become a whole lot easier to score [[Heroin]]?

*If you answered yes to any of the questions there is a good chance your neighborhood has been invaded by Filipinos.

== Teri Hatcher on Filipinos ==
[http://www.gmanews.tv/story/57869 After nursing students were found cheating on their board exam by leakage, who WOULDN'T question a Filipino medical practitioner?]

<center><youtube>2sqyGdc5H6g</youtube></center>

Clearly, Filipinos have [http://pinayexpat.net/?p=831 no sense of humor], contrary to some [http://liveinthephilippines.com/americanlola/2007/12/07/filipino-humor/ people's] [http://mdmechiang.blogspot.com/2007/07/things-i-will-miss-from-philippines.html opinions]. Yeah, they're hypocritical about that, they wouldn't hesitate to make fun of other nationalities, but they'll get butthurt when they're on the spotlight.

== M.V. Princess of The Stars ==

A tragedy that induced tons of butthurt and internet drama. The videos explain them all.

<center>'''What happened'''</center>

<center><youtube>AARE-XABjqk</youtube></center>

<center>'''Tribute?'''</center>

<center><youtube>ddGqXQYEDsw</youtube></center>

==Filthypinos on TV==
<center>'''Typical fillipino cartoon'''</center>
<center><youtube>bSJ9KixKAqM</youtube></center>
<center>This is how they view themselves.</center>

== Trolling Filipinos Made Easy ==
Coming from an actual Asian nigger, most Failipinos are '''insanely''' easy to troll over the internet. With deep religious indoctrination, flimsy patriotic roots, and [[sarcasm]] being an alien concept there, this for starters is enough to work with.

[[File:1911.jpg|thumb|The M1911 pistol was built by America [[wikipedia:M1911 pistol#Early history and adaptations|specifically to kill Filipinos because their guys were too retarded to shoot people in the head]].]]

* Simply link them this article, sit back and watch the show.
* Explain why Filipinos are not Asian. (For quick reference, just say that they're a mixture of niggers and [[Spain|spics]] this is mostly historically accurate. But you'll loose out once they pull out their Malayan decent, which is sort of Asian.)
* Say that Filippinos are Pacific Islanders
* Mention how ugly their women are.
* Ask them why all of their women have frog faces fixed with permanent scowls.
* Mention that their women are trying to look like a pretty Caucasian Euro-chick model when in fact they looked like an asian nigger born from horseshit (Plastic surgery is SERIOUS BUSINESS in the Philippines). As expected, they ended up as a shambling abomination.
* Tell them their skin color is the color of shit and how this analogy is perfect for them.
* Tell the girls that they love to wear short-shorts despite having a varicose vein/cellulite on their legs and call themselves "sexy".
* Tell them Francis-M's music is shit. Watch a thousand wannabe patriots descend upon you.
* Notify them of how nerdy and stupid they are.
* Tell them Filipinos are wannabe-gangsters who suck nigger cock.
* Tell them that they are genetically inferior.
* Tell them that they are basically Azns with [[Spanish]] names.
* In addition to the previous tip, tell them they are closer to [[Canuck]]s somehow.
* Compare the mustaches of their women to that of Groucho Marx.
* Tell them that Filipinos love to throw their shit in places with signs "NO LITTERING" written in Tagalog.
* If you ever meet a Fil-Am, Fil-Brit, Fil-Fuck or Fil-Martian who does not know any shit of Tagalog, and/or haven't been to the Philippines with all his/her pathetic life, and ''yet'' proclaim themselves Filipinos, tell them to STFU and kill themselves.
* Tell them that they flunked English because they have used [[1337]] in their thesis.
* Tell them Manny Pacquiao enjoys massive amounts of steroids.
* Tell them Manny Pacquiao is overrated and has lost on several occasions.
* Tell them Manny Pacquiao plain sucks.
* Cheer for Manny Pacquao's opponent whenever he has a match.
* Ask them where the Philippines is.
* Call the Philippines "Canada Island".
* Call them Canadian, not Asian.
* Tell them the Philippines wouldn't be a third-world shithole today if they would have just accepted American imperialism and became a US state.
* Tell them China rightfully owns Spratly's Islands.
* Ask them when they're gonna shower because they look dirty.
* Tell them that T.V. Carpio is better than Charice because the latter shouts and screams and is fucking annoying
* Tell them that [[Shit nobody cares about|Sarah Geronimo]] has the singing voice of tone-deaf retard.
* Create Facebook pages that the mentions either: You hate the them/God hates them/They belong to the devil. Promote it to some popular local board under the guise of a concerned patriot and watch the buttloads of hate unfold. [[Truth|This is a tried-and-true method]] that will never fail you until Failbook shuts you down, which is usually in about 2 weeks.
* Say that you are an Atheist and watch their mouths froth.
* Say God/Jesus doesn't exist, watch the [[hate|love]] unfold. Don't bother with Allah or any other God, they're not too big there.
* Post [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v1Q676tSCeI this link] on unsuspecting Failipenoys and watch them [[BAWWWWW]] [[U MAD|to your delight]]
* Cheer for the other side when the [[soccer|Azkals]] have a game against another country.
* Go to [http://www.facebook.com/JSanchezAI11 Jessica Sanchez's Fanpage] and tell them that her voice is the equivalent of a dying bitch. Watch them berserk to your delight.
* Being arrogant pieces of shit.

== Further glimpses ==

<center><gallery>
File:Filipopo.jpg|Filipino Giant Boy
File:Crucifun.jpg|Everybody gets a turn
File:Moarbalut.JPG|Satisfying and delicious balut totally not lying
File:Vagina-repair.jpg|"Get rid of a baby. The mister will be happy. It's possible to do it." How delightful.
File:PhillipinegrowthrateDuerto.jpg|Inb4 capitalism
File:Jejekids.jpg|Typical kids in Failippines.
File:Yellowcocks.jpg|The president's pastime.
File:Flip bar.jpg|Filipinos can be ground up and made into a nutritious source of food.
File:AFilipina.jpg|A Filipina at work
File:YoungFilipina.jpg
</gallery></center>

== See also ==
* [[Rodrigo Duterte]]
* [[Asia]]
* [[Bleedman]]
* [[Alodia]]
* [[Bakla]]
* [[English]]
* [[Gook]]
* [[Onigojirakaiju]]
* [[Spain]]
* [[The Jewnited States of Americunts]]
* [[Rolando Mendoza]]

{{Takedown}}
{{Commonwealth}}
{{unitedstates}}
{{Spanish}}
{{Azn}}
{{Timeline|Featured article April 30, [[2007]]|[[Saddam Hussein]]|[[Philippines]]|[[Ray Jones]]}}
{{Timeline|Featured article March 4, [[2008]]|[[Animal Dreams]]|[[Philippines]]|[[BME]]}}
[[Category:Locations]]

Blue Archive

2026-05-15T05:58:43Z

Gooksu:

The Blue Archive is a game created by [[Gook]] of the [[Good Korea|South korean]] game company Nexon, which seeks money from [[Weebs]] and [[Pedophiles]].
{{pedophile}}

== See also ==

* [[Korea]]
* [[Japan]]
* [[Anime]]
* [[Maplestory]]
* [[Genshin Impact]]
* [[Lolicon]]
* [[Pedophiles]]
* [[Weeb]]

{{Anime}}
{{Gaming}}
{{Dying Alone}}
{{Korea}}
{{Japan}}
{{Pedoseries}}

Blue Archive

2026-05-15T05:58:28Z

Gooksu:

The Blue Archive is a game created by [[Gook]] of the [[Good Korea|South korean]] game company Nexon, which seeks money from [[Weebs]] and [[Pedophiles]].
{{pedophile}}
{{potential}}

== See also ==

* [[Korea]]
* [[Japan]]
* [[Anime]]
* [[Maplestory]]
* [[Genshin Impact]]
* [[Lolicon]]
* [[Pedophiles]]
* [[Weeb]]

{{Anime}}
{{Gaming}}
{{Dying Alone}}
{{Korea}}
{{Japan}}
{{Pedoseries}}

Asia

2026-05-15T05:57:37Z

Gooksu: /* Contributions to the Rest of the World */

[[File:ChineseCitizen.jpg|thumb|A typical [[Azn|Asian Citizen]].]]
[[File:Asiaalbum.jpg|thumb|Now with Rainbow Dragons.]]

'''Asia''' is a massive slab of small-penisry and fail that stretches from the eastern edge of the [[Russia|Soviet Union]] all the way to that [[Japan|island where they make all that sick pornography]]. The men are uniformly short and small-cocked, and the women, "women", are dubiously gendered. All Asians have slanted eyes and noses that look like they were smashed with a hammer, yellowish skin, and a lot of them have buck teeth and poor eyesight. To sum up their appearance, they look like they were farted on by a fat, [[Americunts|Americunt]] [[Wapanese|weeaboo]] who ate too many egg rolls whilst jacking off to his [[Lolicon|loli]] collection, rendering the poor creatures to look like horribly disfigured piss monkeys. Asia is noted for posessing some of the [[China|largest landmasses that contain absolutely no win]]. Some win was detected in Japan, but upon mineral survey it was found to be contaminated with dangerous levels of weeaboocite. This did not stop thousands of American [[teenager|prospectors]] from trying to mine it. The [[weeaboo|condition]] that results from exposure is hideous.

The primary value of Asia to the rest of the world lies in their sheer numbers. Most Asian countries are so overpopulated, a human life is worth less than a coon in Tennessee. This allows them to mass produce electronics with slave labor, and farm large amounts of rice and tea for weeb faggots in oher countries to consume. It is also the last bastion of Communism, at least until [[Black_Jesus|Obama]] launches his red revolution. And last, but certainly not least, Asia is the world's number one source of sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet underage child sex. That and [[Thailand|tranny dick]], tangy, tangy, tangy, tranny dick.
<center> <youtube>9-nXT8lSnPQ</youtube></center>

[[File:asiansdrive.jpg|thumb|While Asian countries are known to produce awesome cars, most of their people can't drive worth a shit as evidenced here]].]]

== Contributions to the Rest of the World ==

* [[Animu]], [[Manga]]
* [[Hentai]]
* [[Manga|Manhwa]], [[Hentai|Pornhwa]]
* Cheap [[crap]]
* [[Squid Game]]
* [[Blue Archive]]
* [[Genshin Impact]]
* Fortune cookies, Taoism, Confucianism, Dragon worship lol
* [[Baby fuck]], [[TITTY MONSTER]], and [[Yaranaika]]
* [[Influenza|Bird flu]],Stds,[[Disease|SARS]] and the [[Disease|Black Death]]
* [[Bukkake]], [[guro]], [[hentai]], [[shibari]], [[lolicon]], [[shotacon]], [[toddlercon]], [[yaoi]], ecchi and [[yuri]]
* [[OM NOM NOM|Doing wonders]] for the [[dog|canine]] and [[cat|feline]] population
* [[Eel girl]] and [[Tubgirl]]
* [[Final Fantasy]], [[Gyakuten Saiban]], [[Katamari Damacy]], [[Kirby]], [[Legend of Zelda]], [[Mario]], [[Okami]], [[Pikmin]], [[Pokémon]], [[Resident Evil]], [[Silent Hill]], [[Sonic the Hedgehog]], and [[Power Rangers|Super Sentai]]
* Glorious contributions to [[global climate change]]
* [[Gun]]s
* [[Hippies|Humanitarians]], including Cruel Chinese Emperors, [[Mao Zedong]], [[Pol Pot]] and [[Japan|Emperor Shōwa]]
* [[I LIEK MILK]]
* Animal cruelty
* [[Japanese Bug Fights]]
* [[Nintendo]]
* [[PAPER MARIO SCREENCAP|Paper]]
* [[Playstation]], [[Playstation 2]], [[Playstation 3]], Playstation 4 and Playstation 4.5 [[Matrix|NEO]]
* [[Pocky]] and [[ramen]]
* Shitty plastic toys
* Smaller, more efficient versions of [[cars]], [[cell phone]]s, [[computers]], [[women]], [[etc]].
* [[Tamagotchi]]
* [[Terrorist]]s of all sorts
* [[Tunak]]
* [[pedophilia|underage children]]
* Sweatshops
* Domestic violence
* Rape
* Illegal immigration
* Multiculturalism!

== The Land of Communism ==

There are more [[socialist]] countries in Asia than any other continent in the world. Cambodia, China, Japan, Laos, Mongolia, Myanmar, Nepal, North Korea, Thailand, Singapore, Vietnam and in the near future (if you take your cue from [[New Hampshire]] [[survivalist]]s), all of the countries of Asia. These gooks are responsible for genocides, horrific and brutal [[torture]], [[buttsecks|blatant human rights violations]], [[Iraq|unjust wars]], [[trolling IRL|unimaginably evil acts]] of [[animal abuse|animal cruelty]], (such as cooking and skinning dogs and cats alive), and the utter and [[censorship|complete suppression]] of their citizens. These commie gooks and their evils/atrocities, will never be brought to [[justice]] for their crimes because its "[[racist]]" to bring [[Azns]] to justice. It is simply something most people just ignore in hopes these commie scum don't bring their disease to the civilized world!

==Pastimes==
Asians are renowned for their shoe-sewing skills and are known to enjoy running people over and eating rice. A common game played in Asia is called ''Find Waawdo'' which is the same as ''Find [[Where's Waldo?|Waldo]]'' in western countries, except far, far more difficult, given that all Asian people look exactly the same. Typical places featured in Find Waawdo include shoe-sewing factories and rice paddies. 
It is well known that all Asian's brains have an expiry date at which time they finally crack, pull out the knife and stab the [[Nevada-tan|nearest]] [[Tim McLean|person]].

==Cultures==
Asia is home to many ancient and sophisticated cultures which developed such modern technologies as [[India|burning women alive]] and [[China|pollution]]. Many Asians now celebrate this glorious past by trying to act like [[Rap|black people]].

No Asian culture places any value on human life at all, for [[Kamikaze|themselves]], their families, or [[Pol Pot|others]]. For this reason they tend to live in gigantic clusters in small houses, which results in enormous disasters (ie, "Pickup Truck Rolls Over In Jakarta - Three Thousand Killed, Fifty Thousand Left Homeless").

==Countries==
There are many countries in Asia and most of them don't matter. A few that you may know are:

[[China]], where most of the West's industry is now located, filled with a writhing mass of people who will cheat, steal, lie, and kill you in their passion to rule the world. Hated by the Japanese.

[[Myanmar]], pretty much China's bitch, the one where the local [[gooks]] blend in with the pagodas. currently raping the [[sandniggers|towelfags]] in the up the ass for the lulz, much to the dismay of [[Retards|The UN]]

[[Japan]], the chosen land of sad losers and pedophiles the world over. They hate you and everyone else who isn't Japanese, and they're shrinking. Will probably be annexed by China in a century or so once they've ceased to matter anymore.

[[Korea]], sort of like a mini-China but much less interesting. The Japanese & chinese hate them the most of all, and want them all dead. Also half of the country is run by a dying maniac and his fat retarded son, so remains good for many lulz to come.

[[Singapore]], another mini-china yet capitalistic and much better of than the rest of Southeast Asia.

[[Indonesia]], a country that really hates China. Despite the Chinese locals being kind to them, the Indonesians kill them in return for their kindness. Tries too hard to exceed China, even by littering, plastic pollution and mental retardation.

[[Vietnam]], mostly interesting because of their success in killing Americans many years ago, nowadays hosts a lot of hipster vacationers. Probably hated by the Japanese.

[[Thailand]], cheap prostitutes and expat [[priest|boy]][[Islam|fuckers]]. Probably hated by the Japanese as well.

[[Philippines]], most Western Southeast Asian country and culturally closer to [[Spic]]s than to [[Gooks]], once a Bitch of [[Jewnited States of Americunts]]

[[India]], a huge filthy crowded slum of a country. Somehow manages to run a space program and a high tech industry despite the vast incompetence of its people.

==Human Trafficking ==

Asia has emerged as the preferred source of young [[boy]]s and [[girl]]s for [[pedophilia|pedophilic]] sex tourism and the source of women for trafficking into sex-dens/brothels in the red-light districts of most major cities in the world. Be care many of the Asian "ladies" you might meet are trannies!

== Gallery of Asian "[[slut|Ladies]]" ==

<center>
<gallery>
File:Egg-girl48.jpg
File:Egg girl445.jpg
File:Egg-girl17.jpg
File:Egg-Girl51.jpg
File:Egggirllol.jpg
File:Egg girl112.jpg
File:Egg girl87.jpg
File:Dyosa.jpg|[[Yes|Is that a dick?]]
File:Azn4sale.jpg|[[Fact]]: all Asians are pedophiles.
File:Femdom handjob by lena lang2.gif|Asian women give good handjobs
File:274855 14big.jpg|One of the hottest Asian females
File:159696 12big.jpg
File:Thai girl.jpg
File:Filipino Girl.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

== Famous Asians ==

* [[Asia LeeShawn Ferguson|Asia Ferguson]]
* [[Benazir Bhutto]]
* [[Bleedman]]
* [[Buddha]]
* [[Cho Seung-Hui]]
* [[Edison Chen]]
* [[Gackt]]
* [[Hard Gay]]
* [[Jiverly Voong]]
* [[Kato|Kato Tomohiro]]
* [[Kim Jong-Il|Kim Jong-Il]]
* [[Lmao Zedong]]
* [[Otoya Yamaguchi]]
* [[Pol Pot]]
* [[HOW CAN SHE SLAP?!?|Ravi Bhatia]]
* [[Bus Uncle|Roger Chan]]
* [[Teruaki Murakami]]
* [[Teruchan]]
* [[Tila Tequila]]
* [[Little Fatty|Xiao Pang]]

 

[[Category:Locations]]
{{Commonwealth}}

Asia

2026-05-15T05:56:02Z

Gooksu: /* Contributions to the Rest of the World */

[[File:ChineseCitizen.jpg|thumb|A typical [[Azn|Asian Citizen]].]]
[[File:Asiaalbum.jpg|thumb|Now with Rainbow Dragons.]]

'''Asia''' is a massive slab of small-penisry and fail that stretches from the eastern edge of the [[Russia|Soviet Union]] all the way to that [[Japan|island where they make all that sick pornography]]. The men are uniformly short and small-cocked, and the women, "women", are dubiously gendered. All Asians have slanted eyes and noses that look like they were smashed with a hammer, yellowish skin, and a lot of them have buck teeth and poor eyesight. To sum up their appearance, they look like they were farted on by a fat, [[Americunts|Americunt]] [[Wapanese|weeaboo]] who ate too many egg rolls whilst jacking off to his [[Lolicon|loli]] collection, rendering the poor creatures to look like horribly disfigured piss monkeys. Asia is noted for posessing some of the [[China|largest landmasses that contain absolutely no win]]. Some win was detected in Japan, but upon mineral survey it was found to be contaminated with dangerous levels of weeaboocite. This did not stop thousands of American [[teenager|prospectors]] from trying to mine it. The [[weeaboo|condition]] that results from exposure is hideous.

The primary value of Asia to the rest of the world lies in their sheer numbers. Most Asian countries are so overpopulated, a human life is worth less than a coon in Tennessee. This allows them to mass produce electronics with slave labor, and farm large amounts of rice and tea for weeb faggots in oher countries to consume. It is also the last bastion of Communism, at least until [[Black_Jesus|Obama]] launches his red revolution. And last, but certainly not least, Asia is the world's number one source of sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet underage child sex. That and [[Thailand|tranny dick]], tangy, tangy, tangy, tranny dick.
<center> <youtube>9-nXT8lSnPQ</youtube></center>

[[File:asiansdrive.jpg|thumb|While Asian countries are known to produce awesome cars, most of their people can't drive worth a shit as evidenced here]].]]

== Contributions to the Rest of the World ==

* [[Animu]], [[Manga]]
* [[Hentai]]
* [[Manga|Manhwa]], [[Hentai|Pornhwa]]
* Cheap [[crap]]
* Fortune cookies, Taoism, Confucianism, Dragon worship lol
* [[Baby fuck]], [[TITTY MONSTER]], and [[Yaranaika]]
* [[Influenza|Bird flu]],Stds,[[Disease|SARS]] and the [[Disease|Black Death]]
* [[Bukkake]], [[guro]], [[hentai]], [[shibari]], [[lolicon]], [[shotacon]], [[toddlercon]], [[yaoi]], ecchi and [[yuri]]
* [[OM NOM NOM|Doing wonders]] for the [[dog|canine]] and [[cat|feline]] population
* [[Eel girl]] and [[Tubgirl]]
* [[Final Fantasy]], [[Gyakuten Saiban]], [[Katamari Damacy]], [[Kirby]], [[Legend of Zelda]], [[Mario]], [[Okami]], [[Pikmin]], [[Pokémon]], [[Resident Evil]], [[Silent Hill]], [[Sonic the Hedgehog]], and [[Power Rangers|Super Sentai]]
* Glorious contributions to [[global climate change]]
* [[Gun]]s
* [[Hippies|Humanitarians]], including Cruel Chinese Emperors, [[Mao Zedong]], [[Pol Pot]] and [[Japan|Emperor Shōwa]]
* [[I LIEK MILK]]
* Animal cruelty
* [[Japanese Bug Fights]]
* [[Nintendo]]
* [[PAPER MARIO SCREENCAP|Paper]]
* [[Playstation]], [[Playstation 2]], [[Playstation 3]], Playstation 4 and Playstation 4.5 [[Matrix|NEO]]
* [[Pocky]] and [[ramen]]
* Shitty plastic toys
* Smaller, more efficient versions of [[cars]], [[cell phone]]s, [[computers]], [[women]], [[etc]].
* [[Tamagotchi]]
* [[Terrorist]]s of all sorts
* [[Tunak]]
* [[pedophilia|underage children]]
* Sweatshops
* Domestic violence
* Rape
* Illegal immigration
* Multiculturalism!

== The Land of Communism ==

There are more [[socialist]] countries in Asia than any other continent in the world. Cambodia, China, Japan, Laos, Mongolia, Myanmar, Nepal, North Korea, Thailand, Singapore, Vietnam and in the near future (if you take your cue from [[New Hampshire]] [[survivalist]]s), all of the countries of Asia. These gooks are responsible for genocides, horrific and brutal [[torture]], [[buttsecks|blatant human rights violations]], [[Iraq|unjust wars]], [[trolling IRL|unimaginably evil acts]] of [[animal abuse|animal cruelty]], (such as cooking and skinning dogs and cats alive), and the utter and [[censorship|complete suppression]] of their citizens. These commie gooks and their evils/atrocities, will never be brought to [[justice]] for their crimes because its "[[racist]]" to bring [[Azns]] to justice. It is simply something most people just ignore in hopes these commie scum don't bring their disease to the civilized world!

==Pastimes==
Asians are renowned for their shoe-sewing skills and are known to enjoy running people over and eating rice. A common game played in Asia is called ''Find Waawdo'' which is the same as ''Find [[Where's Waldo?|Waldo]]'' in western countries, except far, far more difficult, given that all Asian people look exactly the same. Typical places featured in Find Waawdo include shoe-sewing factories and rice paddies. 
It is well known that all Asian's brains have an expiry date at which time they finally crack, pull out the knife and stab the [[Nevada-tan|nearest]] [[Tim McLean|person]].

==Cultures==
Asia is home to many ancient and sophisticated cultures which developed such modern technologies as [[India|burning women alive]] and [[China|pollution]]. Many Asians now celebrate this glorious past by trying to act like [[Rap|black people]].

No Asian culture places any value on human life at all, for [[Kamikaze|themselves]], their families, or [[Pol Pot|others]]. For this reason they tend to live in gigantic clusters in small houses, which results in enormous disasters (ie, "Pickup Truck Rolls Over In Jakarta - Three Thousand Killed, Fifty Thousand Left Homeless").

==Countries==
There are many countries in Asia and most of them don't matter. A few that you may know are:

[[China]], where most of the West's industry is now located, filled with a writhing mass of people who will cheat, steal, lie, and kill you in their passion to rule the world. Hated by the Japanese.

[[Myanmar]], pretty much China's bitch, the one where the local [[gooks]] blend in with the pagodas. currently raping the [[sandniggers|towelfags]] in the up the ass for the lulz, much to the dismay of [[Retards|The UN]]

[[Japan]], the chosen land of sad losers and pedophiles the world over. They hate you and everyone else who isn't Japanese, and they're shrinking. Will probably be annexed by China in a century or so once they've ceased to matter anymore.

[[Korea]], sort of like a mini-China but much less interesting. The Japanese & chinese hate them the most of all, and want them all dead. Also half of the country is run by a dying maniac and his fat retarded son, so remains good for many lulz to come.

[[Singapore]], another mini-china yet capitalistic and much better of than the rest of Southeast Asia.

[[Indonesia]], a country that really hates China. Despite the Chinese locals being kind to them, the Indonesians kill them in return for their kindness. Tries too hard to exceed China, even by littering, plastic pollution and mental retardation.

[[Vietnam]], mostly interesting because of their success in killing Americans many years ago, nowadays hosts a lot of hipster vacationers. Probably hated by the Japanese.

[[Thailand]], cheap prostitutes and expat [[priest|boy]][[Islam|fuckers]]. Probably hated by the Japanese as well.

[[Philippines]], most Western Southeast Asian country and culturally closer to [[Spic]]s than to [[Gooks]], once a Bitch of [[Jewnited States of Americunts]]

[[India]], a huge filthy crowded slum of a country. Somehow manages to run a space program and a high tech industry despite the vast incompetence of its people.

==Human Trafficking ==

Asia has emerged as the preferred source of young [[boy]]s and [[girl]]s for [[pedophilia|pedophilic]] sex tourism and the source of women for trafficking into sex-dens/brothels in the red-light districts of most major cities in the world. Be care many of the Asian "ladies" you might meet are trannies!

== Gallery of Asian "[[slut|Ladies]]" ==

<center>
<gallery>
File:Egg-girl48.jpg
File:Egg girl445.jpg
File:Egg-girl17.jpg
File:Egg-Girl51.jpg
File:Egggirllol.jpg
File:Egg girl112.jpg
File:Egg girl87.jpg
File:Dyosa.jpg|[[Yes|Is that a dick?]]
File:Azn4sale.jpg|[[Fact]]: all Asians are pedophiles.
File:Femdom handjob by lena lang2.gif|Asian women give good handjobs
File:274855 14big.jpg|One of the hottest Asian females
File:159696 12big.jpg
File:Thai girl.jpg
File:Filipino Girl.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

== Famous Asians ==

* [[Asia LeeShawn Ferguson|Asia Ferguson]]
* [[Benazir Bhutto]]
* [[Bleedman]]
* [[Buddha]]
* [[Cho Seung-Hui]]
* [[Edison Chen]]
* [[Gackt]]
* [[Hard Gay]]
* [[Jiverly Voong]]
* [[Kato|Kato Tomohiro]]
* [[Kim Jong-Il|Kim Jong-Il]]
* [[Lmao Zedong]]
* [[Otoya Yamaguchi]]
* [[Pol Pot]]
* [[HOW CAN SHE SLAP?!?|Ravi Bhatia]]
* [[Bus Uncle|Roger Chan]]
* [[Teruaki Murakami]]
* [[Teruchan]]
* [[Tila Tequila]]
* [[Little Fatty|Xiao Pang]]

 

[[Category:Locations]]
{{Commonwealth}}

Asia

2026-05-15T05:55:39Z

Gooksu: /* Contributions to the Rest of the World */

[[File:ChineseCitizen.jpg|thumb|A typical [[Azn|Asian Citizen]].]]
[[File:Asiaalbum.jpg|thumb|Now with Rainbow Dragons.]]

'''Asia''' is a massive slab of small-penisry and fail that stretches from the eastern edge of the [[Russia|Soviet Union]] all the way to that [[Japan|island where they make all that sick pornography]]. The men are uniformly short and small-cocked, and the women, "women", are dubiously gendered. All Asians have slanted eyes and noses that look like they were smashed with a hammer, yellowish skin, and a lot of them have buck teeth and poor eyesight. To sum up their appearance, they look like they were farted on by a fat, [[Americunts|Americunt]] [[Wapanese|weeaboo]] who ate too many egg rolls whilst jacking off to his [[Lolicon|loli]] collection, rendering the poor creatures to look like horribly disfigured piss monkeys. Asia is noted for posessing some of the [[China|largest landmasses that contain absolutely no win]]. Some win was detected in Japan, but upon mineral survey it was found to be contaminated with dangerous levels of weeaboocite. This did not stop thousands of American [[teenager|prospectors]] from trying to mine it. The [[weeaboo|condition]] that results from exposure is hideous.

The primary value of Asia to the rest of the world lies in their sheer numbers. Most Asian countries are so overpopulated, a human life is worth less than a coon in Tennessee. This allows them to mass produce electronics with slave labor, and farm large amounts of rice and tea for weeb faggots in oher countries to consume. It is also the last bastion of Communism, at least until [[Black_Jesus|Obama]] launches his red revolution. And last, but certainly not least, Asia is the world's number one source of sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet underage child sex. That and [[Thailand|tranny dick]], tangy, tangy, tangy, tranny dick.
<center> <youtube>9-nXT8lSnPQ</youtube></center>

[[File:asiansdrive.jpg|thumb|While Asian countries are known to produce awesome cars, most of their people can't drive worth a shit as evidenced here]].]]

== Contributions to the Rest of the World ==

* [[Animu]], [[Manga]]
* [[Manga|Manhwa]], [[Hentai|Pornhwa]]
* Cheap [[crap]]
* Fortune cookies, Taoism, Confucianism, Dragon worship lol
* [[Baby fuck]], [[TITTY MONSTER]], and [[Yaranaika]]
* [[Influenza|Bird flu]],Stds,[[Disease|SARS]] and the [[Disease|Black Death]]
* [[Bukkake]], [[guro]], [[hentai]], [[shibari]], [[lolicon]], [[shotacon]], [[toddlercon]], [[yaoi]], ecchi and [[yuri]]
* [[OM NOM NOM|Doing wonders]] for the [[dog|canine]] and [[cat|feline]] population
* [[Eel girl]] and [[Tubgirl]]
* [[Final Fantasy]], [[Gyakuten Saiban]], [[Katamari Damacy]], [[Kirby]], [[Legend of Zelda]], [[Mario]], [[Okami]], [[Pikmin]], [[Pokémon]], [[Resident Evil]], [[Silent Hill]], [[Sonic the Hedgehog]], and [[Power Rangers|Super Sentai]]
* Glorious contributions to [[global climate change]]
* [[Gun]]s
* [[Hippies|Humanitarians]], including Cruel Chinese Emperors, [[Mao Zedong]], [[Pol Pot]] and [[Japan|Emperor Shōwa]]
* [[I LIEK MILK]]
* Animal cruelty
* [[Japanese Bug Fights]]
* [[Nintendo]]
* [[PAPER MARIO SCREENCAP|Paper]]
* [[Playstation]], [[Playstation 2]], [[Playstation 3]], Playstation 4 and Playstation 4.5 [[Matrix|NEO]]
* [[Pocky]] and [[ramen]]
* Shitty plastic toys
* Smaller, more efficient versions of [[cars]], [[cell phone]]s, [[computers]], [[women]], [[etc]].
* [[Tamagotchi]]
* [[Terrorist]]s of all sorts
* [[Tunak]]
* [[pedophilia|underage children]]
* Sweatshops
* Domestic violence
* Rape
* Illegal immigration
* Multiculturalism!
* [[hentai]]

== The Land of Communism ==

There are more [[socialist]] countries in Asia than any other continent in the world. Cambodia, China, Japan, Laos, Mongolia, Myanmar, Nepal, North Korea, Thailand, Singapore, Vietnam and in the near future (if you take your cue from [[New Hampshire]] [[survivalist]]s), all of the countries of Asia. These gooks are responsible for genocides, horrific and brutal [[torture]], [[buttsecks|blatant human rights violations]], [[Iraq|unjust wars]], [[trolling IRL|unimaginably evil acts]] of [[animal abuse|animal cruelty]], (such as cooking and skinning dogs and cats alive), and the utter and [[censorship|complete suppression]] of their citizens. These commie gooks and their evils/atrocities, will never be brought to [[justice]] for their crimes because its "[[racist]]" to bring [[Azns]] to justice. It is simply something most people just ignore in hopes these commie scum don't bring their disease to the civilized world!

==Pastimes==
Asians are renowned for their shoe-sewing skills and are known to enjoy running people over and eating rice. A common game played in Asia is called ''Find Waawdo'' which is the same as ''Find [[Where's Waldo?|Waldo]]'' in western countries, except far, far more difficult, given that all Asian people look exactly the same. Typical places featured in Find Waawdo include shoe-sewing factories and rice paddies. 
It is well known that all Asian's brains have an expiry date at which time they finally crack, pull out the knife and stab the [[Nevada-tan|nearest]] [[Tim McLean|person]].

==Cultures==
Asia is home to many ancient and sophisticated cultures which developed such modern technologies as [[India|burning women alive]] and [[China|pollution]]. Many Asians now celebrate this glorious past by trying to act like [[Rap|black people]].

No Asian culture places any value on human life at all, for [[Kamikaze|themselves]], their families, or [[Pol Pot|others]]. For this reason they tend to live in gigantic clusters in small houses, which results in enormous disasters (ie, "Pickup Truck Rolls Over In Jakarta - Three Thousand Killed, Fifty Thousand Left Homeless").

==Countries==
There are many countries in Asia and most of them don't matter. A few that you may know are:

[[China]], where most of the West's industry is now located, filled with a writhing mass of people who will cheat, steal, lie, and kill you in their passion to rule the world. Hated by the Japanese.

[[Myanmar]], pretty much China's bitch, the one where the local [[gooks]] blend in with the pagodas. currently raping the [[sandniggers|towelfags]] in the up the ass for the lulz, much to the dismay of [[Retards|The UN]]

[[Japan]], the chosen land of sad losers and pedophiles the world over. They hate you and everyone else who isn't Japanese, and they're shrinking. Will probably be annexed by China in a century or so once they've ceased to matter anymore.

[[Korea]], sort of like a mini-China but much less interesting. The Japanese & chinese hate them the most of all, and want them all dead. Also half of the country is run by a dying maniac and his fat retarded son, so remains good for many lulz to come.

[[Singapore]], another mini-china yet capitalistic and much better of than the rest of Southeast Asia.

[[Indonesia]], a country that really hates China. Despite the Chinese locals being kind to them, the Indonesians kill them in return for their kindness. Tries too hard to exceed China, even by littering, plastic pollution and mental retardation.

[[Vietnam]], mostly interesting because of their success in killing Americans many years ago, nowadays hosts a lot of hipster vacationers. Probably hated by the Japanese.

[[Thailand]], cheap prostitutes and expat [[priest|boy]][[Islam|fuckers]]. Probably hated by the Japanese as well.

[[Philippines]], most Western Southeast Asian country and culturally closer to [[Spic]]s than to [[Gooks]], once a Bitch of [[Jewnited States of Americunts]]

[[India]], a huge filthy crowded slum of a country. Somehow manages to run a space program and a high tech industry despite the vast incompetence of its people.

==Human Trafficking ==

Asia has emerged as the preferred source of young [[boy]]s and [[girl]]s for [[pedophilia|pedophilic]] sex tourism and the source of women for trafficking into sex-dens/brothels in the red-light districts of most major cities in the world. Be care many of the Asian "ladies" you might meet are trannies!

== Gallery of Asian "[[slut|Ladies]]" ==

<center>
<gallery>
File:Egg-girl48.jpg
File:Egg girl445.jpg
File:Egg-girl17.jpg
File:Egg-Girl51.jpg
File:Egggirllol.jpg
File:Egg girl112.jpg
File:Egg girl87.jpg
File:Dyosa.jpg|[[Yes|Is that a dick?]]
File:Azn4sale.jpg|[[Fact]]: all Asians are pedophiles.
File:Femdom handjob by lena lang2.gif|Asian women give good handjobs
File:274855 14big.jpg|One of the hottest Asian females
File:159696 12big.jpg
File:Thai girl.jpg
File:Filipino Girl.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

== Famous Asians ==

* [[Asia LeeShawn Ferguson|Asia Ferguson]]
* [[Benazir Bhutto]]
* [[Bleedman]]
* [[Buddha]]
* [[Cho Seung-Hui]]
* [[Edison Chen]]
* [[Gackt]]
* [[Hard Gay]]
* [[Jiverly Voong]]
* [[Kato|Kato Tomohiro]]
* [[Kim Jong-Il|Kim Jong-Il]]
* [[Lmao Zedong]]
* [[Otoya Yamaguchi]]
* [[Pol Pot]]
* [[HOW CAN SHE SLAP?!?|Ravi Bhatia]]
* [[Bus Uncle|Roger Chan]]
* [[Teruaki Murakami]]
* [[Teruchan]]
* [[Tila Tequila]]
* [[Little Fatty|Xiao Pang]]

 

[[Category:Locations]]
{{Commonwealth}}

Kpop

2026-05-15T05:53:39Z

Gooksu: /* Videos */

{{DISPLAYTITLE:K-pop}}
[[File:Enhypen.jpeg|thumb|right]]
[[File:DatKoreanAss.gif|thumb|Fans listen to it for the [[ass|plot]]]]
[[File:Psy.jpg|thumb|[[ALL CAPS|OPPA GANGNAM STYLE]]!!!]]
[[File:K pop 4minute 504.gif|thumb|right|300px|All the bouncing is a waste of their time when none of them have any tit]]
[[File:Gangnam-Hump.gif|thumb|No exceptions.]]
[[File:blaxygirls.jpeg|thumb|200px|The only good K-Pop band alongside with [[CupcakKe]], thanks [[Romania]].]]
'''K-pop''' (also known as Korean pop music or "the generals spammed on /mu/ every day") is what the Korean equivalent of [[weeaboo]]s listen to when not [[fap|fapping]] to the identical-looking girls in K-pop music videos. The vast majority of fans will not admit that they really want to be the girls in the videos. Fans of K-pop will viciously defend their surgically altered [[waifu]]s and repeatedly claim that K-pop is ZOMG ''totally'' not the same as that bland, overly-sexualized & corporate-owned American [[pop]] - with its [[Katy Perry|talentless]] and [[Jonas Brothers|forgettable]] artists who don't even write their own material. In fact their beloved K-pop is typically written by the same people and contains ''exactly the same'' cliched lyrics about love/being cheated on, mandated [[Bix Nood|rapping]] that has no place in the song, stupid dances devised to try and make the shit go viral and focus on the sexuality/fashion of the artists rather than the quality of the actual music. In K-pop there are a great many ''boy bands'' and ''girl groups'' made up of talentless and forgettable singers essentially [[owned]] by the music company that writes all their songs. These songs as mentioned previously will often feature rapping sections that in Western music would be performed by some coked-out nigger like [[Kanye West]] or [[crap|Lil Wayne]]; K-pop will instead feature a native who can't rap. So if the song inevitably sucks, at least it wasn't tainted by the presence of a darkie. The artists are so faceless (sometimes literally, thanks to all the plastic surgery) that if they refuse to suck off their producers in a bathhouse they could be killed & replaced by another person and none of their fans would notice due to [[truth|all Koreans looking/sounding exactly alike.]] Clearly, K-pop is nothing like generic pop music.

==The Music==

[[File:Kpop cartoon pic.jpg|right|250px]]

Just like Koreans, all K-pop sounds the same. This is because the music in South Korea, just like cellphones, cars, and souls, is treated as a commodity. Management groups owned by large conglomerates either have rights to an artist's soul or bundle up a random bunch of asians into a group like a Costco value pack. Groups are chosen based on looks alone. All members are taught how to dance and look sexy while lip-syncing their dubbed or auto-tuned lines. The companies decide what they sing, what they wear during concerts and photo shoots, how they act in public, and how much semen they must swallow from stock holders before their contract is renewed (This applies to both the male and female artists). They also control the diet of the talents and will starve them if the Korean public percieves them as a bit overweight; some idols have been allowed such little as "one coffee a day and one small meal every other day", without being allowed to speak up against it. To make more monies, the companies will take random members of a group and create a "sub-unit" which sings the same shit as the regular group but under a different name, thus creating the musical equivalent of [[capcom|DLC]]. The only variety in K-pop is whether the bland studio-produced song is sung by an ultra faggy male idol, a young,skinny,light-skinned female idol, a girl group made up of said idols, or a hyper feminine boy band that makes [[J-Rock|Visual Kei]] look masculine by comparison. When a member complains that they want to be taken seriously, they are laughed out of the studio, replaced, and sacrificed to ensure next year's crop of [[Dragon Ball Z|nappa]] cabbage is plenty.

==The Bands==
[[File:Oneofkind.gif|thumb|Your average K-pop group]]
[[File:Koreanboyband.jpg|thumb| These men are perfectly straight]]

To reflect the fact that they are owned by their corporate overlords, kpop groups are categorized by ridiculous group names that sound like serial codes you would find on a price scanner after tagging an item at [[Walmart]] or stock names you would see on the NasDaq. Examples include:

*T-Ara
*2NE1
*UKISS
*MBLAQ
*BAQX
*LEDApple
*4Minute
*B1A4
*[[BTS]]
*5T1ME
*Girl's Generation
*FT Island
*KIM-T
*BEAST/Highlight
*CNBlue
*BLACKPINK
*ENHYPEN
*EXO
*NCT
*BOY STORY
*ATEEZ
*STRAY KIDS
*AESPA
*NEWJEANS
*Katseye
*Boy Story
*B.A.P
*Crossing Rain (also considered a JPop group) a kpop group from [[Hawaii]].
*DEAR ALICE
*ZEROBASEONE
*xikers
*SEVENTEEN
*BUS (Because of yoU i Shine), stands for that. Remove all the letters except for b, u, and s.
*Loona
*North Star Boys (NSB)
*The Moy Boys (Duo boy band)

At least 3 of those names were made up. Can you guess which ones?

==The Fans==
K-pop fans are the musical equivalent of [[PewDiePie|PewDiepie's]] audience and will viciously defend their genre and fapping material to the death. They swarm [[/mu/]] like a pack of socially-inept locusts, posting K-pop generals left and right in order to impress the hipsters lurking the board with their "unique" tastes. K-pop fans are mainly korean [[weeaboo|weeaboos]] (Koreaboo) who try to stand out from the crowd of other [[ronery]], anime-obsessed, [[Basement Dweller|basement dwellers]] by latching onto the culture of another asian country that isn't [[Japan]]. What many of them don't know is that, like most idols and boy bands, K-pop is mostly marketed to a [[12 year old girl|tween audience]] comprising of [[loli|14 year old Korean girls]]. In other words, K-pop fans don't realize that they are the equivalent of Chinese [[manchild|manchildren]] fapping to [[Fat Larry's Band|One Direction.]] The K-pop fandom is comprised mainly of: people who are actually Korean, Koreaboos, ronery men with yellow fever, fat [[twilight]] fangirls who drool over the hyper-faggy boy groups, and [[Filipino|Filipinos]] who wish they looked more like the asian people in the music video rather than being the ugly asian bastard race.

==Jenny Hyun==
[[Last Thursday]], a songwriter who wrote singles for groups like Girl's Generation named Jenny Hyun was scouring the interwebs for western pop songs she could steal when she came across [[pol]]. After browsing the board for less than 1.4 seconds, she became a nigger-hating, Korean nationalist who fought to maintain South Korea's racial purity from the evil forces of dark-skinned diversity. In response to a tweet made by professional boxer Floyd Mayweather about why some [[asian]] guy becoming a pro-basketball player was big news when black people do it all the time, Hyun responded [[insane|rationally]] to his dumb comment by declaring the eradication of the black race. Below is a compilation of her Nuremberg speech. Meanwhile on the K-pop scene, There is much anticipation over her new upcoming singles "HEIL★HEIL★HEIL♥HITLER-STYLE!" and "깜둥이가 다이 다이!".

Even [[Azn|Chinks]] hate [[Niggers]] which would explain their many differences.

Asians are intelligent and docile. Niggers are stupid and wild.
Asians have an interesting, high-tech culture. Niggers have an cannibalistic culture.
Asians have small dicks. Niggers have big dicks.
Asians have small lips. Niggers have huge lips.
Asians love each other. Niggers hate each other.
Asians are warm and welcoming. Niggers are aggressive and abrasive.
Asians have small and squinty eyes. Niggers have big/ugly googly eyes.

Both are subhuman scum as neither of them are Caucasian. Mongolians slightly resemble monkeys whereas the Negroid DNA IS 69% monkey, which explains their urgent need for sex. As a punishment God gave them pubes on their heads, read more in [[Nigger]].

Niggers promote all white kids to be either; [[Wiggers]], [[Ghetto|Thugs]], [[You|Slackers]] or [[Douchebag|Douchebags]] while on the other hand Asians promote white kids to become; [[Atheist|Heathens]], [[Weeaboo|Weeaboos]], [[Kpop|Koreaboos]], [[You|Nintendofags]] or [[Buddhism|Demonic Buddhists]].
ALL allowed and encouraged by the subhuman Jewish assholes.

Mexicans perspective on Asians and Niggers. Hope you enjoyed!

<center>[[File:Jennyhyunmeltdown.jpg]]</center>

After the media fiasco, Hyun responded with the following:

{{quote|[[Postal 2|I regret nothing]]|Jenny Hyun}}

==Videos==
{{Spoiler|Girl's Generation won [[youtube|jewtube]] Music Award's Video Of The Year!}}

<center><big>'''The following videos will make you question your sexuality'''</big></center> 
<center>{{fv|starvids|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;|
<youtube>EUskig59Xe8</youtube>|
<youtube>U7mPqycQ0tQ</youtube>|<youtube>3vmlYkbcVeA</youtube>|<youtube>k3HcosxKGK8</youtube>|
<youtube>OGvwy3qhjDM</youtube>|
<youtube>hmE9f-TEutc</youtube>|
<youtube>J_CFBjAyPWE</youtube>|
<youtube>NB5jyYD2WEw</youtube>|
<youtube>Mt09l3hFINQ</youtube>}}
</center>

==See Also==
*[[J-pop]]
*[[Koreaboo]]
*[[/mu/]]
*[[Otto Warmbier]] Died because he liked [[North Korea|Northern K-Pop]]
*[[Good Korea|South Korea]]

{{Music}}
{{Azn}}
{{Korea}}
{{Timeline|Featured article August 18 & 19, [[2014]]|[[HowToBasic]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Zoe Quinn]]}}
{{timeline|Featured article July 6 & July 7, [[2024]]|[[4th of July]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Boku No Pico]]}}
{{Retarded Edit Wars}}
[[Category:Music]]
[[Category:Fandom Stuff]]
[[Category:Music Genres]]
[[Category:Subcultures]]

Kpop

2026-05-15T05:53:27Z

Gooksu: /* Videos */

{{DISPLAYTITLE:K-pop}}
[[File:Enhypen.jpeg|thumb|right]]
[[File:DatKoreanAss.gif|thumb|Fans listen to it for the [[ass|plot]]]]
[[File:Psy.jpg|thumb|[[ALL CAPS|OPPA GANGNAM STYLE]]!!!]]
[[File:K pop 4minute 504.gif|thumb|right|300px|All the bouncing is a waste of their time when none of them have any tit]]
[[File:Gangnam-Hump.gif|thumb|No exceptions.]]
[[File:blaxygirls.jpeg|thumb|200px|The only good K-Pop band alongside with [[CupcakKe]], thanks [[Romania]].]]
'''K-pop''' (also known as Korean pop music or "the generals spammed on /mu/ every day") is what the Korean equivalent of [[weeaboo]]s listen to when not [[fap|fapping]] to the identical-looking girls in K-pop music videos. The vast majority of fans will not admit that they really want to be the girls in the videos. Fans of K-pop will viciously defend their surgically altered [[waifu]]s and repeatedly claim that K-pop is ZOMG ''totally'' not the same as that bland, overly-sexualized & corporate-owned American [[pop]] - with its [[Katy Perry|talentless]] and [[Jonas Brothers|forgettable]] artists who don't even write their own material. In fact their beloved K-pop is typically written by the same people and contains ''exactly the same'' cliched lyrics about love/being cheated on, mandated [[Bix Nood|rapping]] that has no place in the song, stupid dances devised to try and make the shit go viral and focus on the sexuality/fashion of the artists rather than the quality of the actual music. In K-pop there are a great many ''boy bands'' and ''girl groups'' made up of talentless and forgettable singers essentially [[owned]] by the music company that writes all their songs. These songs as mentioned previously will often feature rapping sections that in Western music would be performed by some coked-out nigger like [[Kanye West]] or [[crap|Lil Wayne]]; K-pop will instead feature a native who can't rap. So if the song inevitably sucks, at least it wasn't tainted by the presence of a darkie. The artists are so faceless (sometimes literally, thanks to all the plastic surgery) that if they refuse to suck off their producers in a bathhouse they could be killed & replaced by another person and none of their fans would notice due to [[truth|all Koreans looking/sounding exactly alike.]] Clearly, K-pop is nothing like generic pop music.

==The Music==

[[File:Kpop cartoon pic.jpg|right|250px]]

Just like Koreans, all K-pop sounds the same. This is because the music in South Korea, just like cellphones, cars, and souls, is treated as a commodity. Management groups owned by large conglomerates either have rights to an artist's soul or bundle up a random bunch of asians into a group like a Costco value pack. Groups are chosen based on looks alone. All members are taught how to dance and look sexy while lip-syncing their dubbed or auto-tuned lines. The companies decide what they sing, what they wear during concerts and photo shoots, how they act in public, and how much semen they must swallow from stock holders before their contract is renewed (This applies to both the male and female artists). They also control the diet of the talents and will starve them if the Korean public percieves them as a bit overweight; some idols have been allowed such little as "one coffee a day and one small meal every other day", without being allowed to speak up against it. To make more monies, the companies will take random members of a group and create a "sub-unit" which sings the same shit as the regular group but under a different name, thus creating the musical equivalent of [[capcom|DLC]]. The only variety in K-pop is whether the bland studio-produced song is sung by an ultra faggy male idol, a young,skinny,light-skinned female idol, a girl group made up of said idols, or a hyper feminine boy band that makes [[J-Rock|Visual Kei]] look masculine by comparison. When a member complains that they want to be taken seriously, they are laughed out of the studio, replaced, and sacrificed to ensure next year's crop of [[Dragon Ball Z|nappa]] cabbage is plenty.

==The Bands==
[[File:Oneofkind.gif|thumb|Your average K-pop group]]
[[File:Koreanboyband.jpg|thumb| These men are perfectly straight]]

To reflect the fact that they are owned by their corporate overlords, kpop groups are categorized by ridiculous group names that sound like serial codes you would find on a price scanner after tagging an item at [[Walmart]] or stock names you would see on the NasDaq. Examples include:

*T-Ara
*2NE1
*UKISS
*MBLAQ
*BAQX
*LEDApple
*4Minute
*B1A4
*[[BTS]]
*5T1ME
*Girl's Generation
*FT Island
*KIM-T
*BEAST/Highlight
*CNBlue
*BLACKPINK
*ENHYPEN
*EXO
*NCT
*BOY STORY
*ATEEZ
*STRAY KIDS
*AESPA
*NEWJEANS
*Katseye
*Boy Story
*B.A.P
*Crossing Rain (also considered a JPop group) a kpop group from [[Hawaii]].
*DEAR ALICE
*ZEROBASEONE
*xikers
*SEVENTEEN
*BUS (Because of yoU i Shine), stands for that. Remove all the letters except for b, u, and s.
*Loona
*North Star Boys (NSB)
*The Moy Boys (Duo boy band)

At least 3 of those names were made up. Can you guess which ones?

==The Fans==
K-pop fans are the musical equivalent of [[PewDiePie|PewDiepie's]] audience and will viciously defend their genre and fapping material to the death. They swarm [[/mu/]] like a pack of socially-inept locusts, posting K-pop generals left and right in order to impress the hipsters lurking the board with their "unique" tastes. K-pop fans are mainly korean [[weeaboo|weeaboos]] (Koreaboo) who try to stand out from the crowd of other [[ronery]], anime-obsessed, [[Basement Dweller|basement dwellers]] by latching onto the culture of another asian country that isn't [[Japan]]. What many of them don't know is that, like most idols and boy bands, K-pop is mostly marketed to a [[12 year old girl|tween audience]] comprising of [[loli|14 year old Korean girls]]. In other words, K-pop fans don't realize that they are the equivalent of Chinese [[manchild|manchildren]] fapping to [[Fat Larry's Band|One Direction.]] The K-pop fandom is comprised mainly of: people who are actually Korean, Koreaboos, ronery men with yellow fever, fat [[twilight]] fangirls who drool over the hyper-faggy boy groups, and [[Filipino|Filipinos]] who wish they looked more like the asian people in the music video rather than being the ugly asian bastard race.

==Jenny Hyun==
[[Last Thursday]], a songwriter who wrote singles for groups like Girl's Generation named Jenny Hyun was scouring the interwebs for western pop songs she could steal when she came across [[pol]]. After browsing the board for less than 1.4 seconds, she became a nigger-hating, Korean nationalist who fought to maintain South Korea's racial purity from the evil forces of dark-skinned diversity. In response to a tweet made by professional boxer Floyd Mayweather about why some [[asian]] guy becoming a pro-basketball player was big news when black people do it all the time, Hyun responded [[insane|rationally]] to his dumb comment by declaring the eradication of the black race. Below is a compilation of her Nuremberg speech. Meanwhile on the K-pop scene, There is much anticipation over her new upcoming singles "HEIL★HEIL★HEIL♥HITLER-STYLE!" and "깜둥이가 다이 다이!".

Even [[Azn|Chinks]] hate [[Niggers]] which would explain their many differences.

Asians are intelligent and docile. Niggers are stupid and wild.
Asians have an interesting, high-tech culture. Niggers have an cannibalistic culture.
Asians have small dicks. Niggers have big dicks.
Asians have small lips. Niggers have huge lips.
Asians love each other. Niggers hate each other.
Asians are warm and welcoming. Niggers are aggressive and abrasive.
Asians have small and squinty eyes. Niggers have big/ugly googly eyes.

Both are subhuman scum as neither of them are Caucasian. Mongolians slightly resemble monkeys whereas the Negroid DNA IS 69% monkey, which explains their urgent need for sex. As a punishment God gave them pubes on their heads, read more in [[Nigger]].

Niggers promote all white kids to be either; [[Wiggers]], [[Ghetto|Thugs]], [[You|Slackers]] or [[Douchebag|Douchebags]] while on the other hand Asians promote white kids to become; [[Atheist|Heathens]], [[Weeaboo|Weeaboos]], [[Kpop|Koreaboos]], [[You|Nintendofags]] or [[Buddhism|Demonic Buddhists]].
ALL allowed and encouraged by the subhuman Jewish assholes.

Mexicans perspective on Asians and Niggers. Hope you enjoyed!

<center>[[File:Jennyhyunmeltdown.jpg]]</center>

After the media fiasco, Hyun responded with the following:

{{quote|[[Postal 2|I regret nothing]]|Jenny Hyun}}

==Videos==
{{Spoiler|Girl's Generation won [[youtube|jewtube]] Music Award's Video Of The Year!}}

<center><big>'''The following videos will make you question your sexuality'''</big></center> 
<center>{{fv|starvids|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;|
<youtube>EUskig59Xe8</youtube>|
<youtube>U7mPqycQ0tQ</youtube>|<youtube>3vmlYkbcVeA</youtube>|<youtube>k3HcosxKGK8</youtube>|
<youtube>OGvwy3qhjDM</youtube>|
<youtube>hmE9f-TEutc</youtube>|
<youtube>J_CFBjAyPWE</youtube>|
<youtube>NB5jyYD2WEw</youtube>}}
<youtube>Mt09l3hFINQ</youtube>}}
</center>

==See Also==
*[[J-pop]]
*[[Koreaboo]]
*[[/mu/]]
*[[Otto Warmbier]] Died because he liked [[North Korea|Northern K-Pop]]
*[[Good Korea|South Korea]]

{{Music}}
{{Azn}}
{{Korea}}
{{Timeline|Featured article August 18 & 19, [[2014]]|[[HowToBasic]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Zoe Quinn]]}}
{{timeline|Featured article July 6 & July 7, [[2024]]|[[4th of July]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Boku No Pico]]}}
{{Retarded Edit Wars}}
[[Category:Music]]
[[Category:Fandom Stuff]]
[[Category:Music Genres]]
[[Category:Subcultures]]