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Atlanta
Atlanta or Asslanta, is the capital and most populous city of Georgia, as well as home of the EFN and scene for many episodes of LiveJournal drama. My mom says there's a lot of black people in Atlanta, so nothing of value will be lost once the Union reaches it.
During the Civil War, Asslanta was burned to the ground. It rose from the ashes 100 years later to provide the world with a haven for chinless douchebag refugees from cities like Los Angeles, New York, and Chicago, while also boasting the world's most godawful soul-sucking airport. After visiting Atlanta for more than a week, usually due to a layover at Hartsfield, most non-residents attempt to burn the city to the ground again.
Atlanta Neighborhoods
- Midtown - Where the queers live.
- 1247 Holly - Homeless shelter for EFN members.
- Little Five Points - A place for hipsters, hippies, junkies, hobos, street musicians, and artsy fartsy people. A place to find overpriced "one of a kind" clothing, drink coffee, and get harassed by train kids as you walk anywhere in or near the square.
- Buckhead - Location of "Disco Kroger". Apparently in the 80's a disco club opened up next door to the Kroger Grocery Store, and every night around one in the morning when the club closed down, mass amounts of niggers tripping balls would shuffle into the store in search of gourmet fried chickenz, and watermelonz. Buckhead is also where the Conservatives live. There are also lots of h4wt AZN girls there.
- The Concorde - Home of onefiftytwo, Ludacris, and lots of IRL drama.
- Decatur - Half of Decatur is inhabited by nigras. The other half is made up of middle class suburban families, and lesbians. Thefrizzlefry and Hooper_X live here.
- Downtown - The homeless, and malibran. Avoid at all costs, especially the Waffle House at Underground Atlanta after 10pm.
- Duluth - Basically "Little Korea*. Was once overly suburban, but starting to become polluted by mexicans
- East Cobb/Marietta - One of the richest areas in the state, there are no nigras here
- Roswell - Extremely white suburban city. Great place to meet lolis that want to piss off mommy and daddy.
- South Atlanta, which encompasses anything below I-20 (Also known as Collie Parrrr, Eastpoint and MLK Dr.) - Nothing but black person, stay away, especially after DARK!
- North of 285 - Anything north of 285 is a fucking Mexican, chink, inhabited shithole.
- Norcross - the biggest heap of spics in all of Atlanta with more then 9000 percent of its population being Hispanic.
- Smyrna - not that far behind Norcross as far as spic percentage goes. Sightseeing includes a black person store in the shape of a chicken. Locals think it's the best fucking thing ever.
- Johns Creek - Composed only of snobby, rich white people from New England and Korea. People in Johns creek rarely leave their gated neighborhoods, in fear that they might be attacked by negroes. Main attraction - Super H Mart, a Korean supermarket full of dead fish and Hentai.
- Alpharetta - Full of rich white people.
- Milton - Mostly rich white people, with some rich niggers, spics, and azns thrown in. They want to get away from all the poor black people and spics in Atlanta by forming a new county with all the other rich, mostly white cities.
- South of 285 - Nobody was sure what the fuck was south of the perimeter but some believe that it was a vast, arid wasteland of buttes, streams, rocks, Dungeons & dragons monsters and country ass white people. Some have even speculated that perhaps there was a gate that leads to an outside world of some kind with massive jungles, while others still believe that it leads to another piece of dreary, rain soaked shit called Florida. Come to find out all it was just another ghetto mother land called Clayton County. It appears that when the city of Atlanta tore down all the crack houses in College Park all the cockroaches ran south. Its helpful to take an Ebonics translation book with you if you need to go to pick up some wetbacks to do some yard work. If you ever do find yourself south of 285, attempt to reach Peachtree City. PTC is the last bastion of white power, under siege from the black person. Be sure to bring fried chicken if you want to break through their lines.
- Woodstock - The only place in Georgia with no mud-people.
Fun Things to do in Atlanta
Take a ride on the city's metro transit system MARTA, which is actually an acronym for Moving black person Rapidly Through Atlanta.
The Masquerade, a concert venue, makes every thursday night a freak show by hosting 80's night. The crowd is made up of faggots, goths. ravers that didn't have any money (80's night requires a password, not money), and some very irritated looking staff. It's always the same people, 90% of them have slept together, which leads to some great irl drama.
The Clermont Lounge is home to some of the most do not want cumdumpsters in the entire state. Part strip club, part hotel (GG Allin stayed so long that they named a room after him), and one of the must visit landmarks of the city. Blondie being the main attraction of the club, she obviously sets the bar high for the rest of the girls.
Adult Swim is based out of Atlanta, and is located next to Little 5 Points. This would probably be somewhat fun to visit, but the staff and security won't let you inside.
Walking around most neighborhoods at night will basically ensure you getting raped, shot, stabbed, or mugged. The cops will be on the scene to help asap though.
Atlanta and Drugs
The streets of Atlanta, all of Georgia really, are riddled with junkies and dealers. The most notorious neighborhood for crime, and drugs is the Bluffs. Upon entering this cancer of society you'll have boy screamed at you from all directions. Because it's Atlanta any black person you meet on the street is either going to rob you, or sell you fake drugs. Meth is also a favorite among locals, due to it being made there. For some reason GHB has become a recent favorite, which makes that awkward step of finding the right time to slip it into your date's drink a thing of the past.
Failed bullshit attempts to entertain the masses
- Freaknik - A large gathering of African American youths to celebrate rap music, shiny car rims and "fuck some bitches while they at it" Some one finally got smart and flushed that toilet. Also known as "Nigga's Gawn Ghetto".
- Light up Atlanta - Since inbred hicks are easily mesmerized, they brought them in, let them sweat, let them drink shitty skunk beer, and turned on the office building lights at dusk. Millions died in the aftermath of Mary Joe Sue PorkFat Panties Creamer whipping out her massive, stretch marked tits in broad daylight. One person lost an eye due to Redneck Rhodes "Shootin' off some purty fireworks" opening day.
- Georgia Games - Actually were pretty okay, with games like "Yankee tossing", "Lasting longer than three seconds in missionary position" (still an impossible feat for most southern men in general), and the all-time favorite "Get that Skoal can out of my lubed-up ass"
- Pride Festival - The pride festival is a gathering of thousands of half dressed fags from Midtown trying to grab your cock spread the gay's and give you AIDS so steer clear of this celebration.
- The 1996 Summer Olympics - Nothing but a wall to wall ghetto bazaar, and finger pointing fiasco.
Other Residents
- Citrus
- amyzon2313
- neuroxin
- vomitgirl
- old_age
- Fried Chicken, Purple Drink, and Menthol Cigarettes
- RickyFLDMS
- xtex
- mikenatlga
- Mexicans
- Black People
- Koreans
- LARPers
- 050294
- Lol Dæd EFG
- More Black People