Russia Today

Russia Today, more commonly known by its abbreviated form "RT" is a russkie propaganda network and the media branch of Putin's fanclub, meant to subvert foreigners into hardcore Nashi. It was first launched in 2005 to control Russian minds because breaking old Soviet habits is a very hard thing to do. Not content with controlling Russians only, they made another called "Russia Al-Yaum" as an Arabic version in 2007 in addition to other language versions nobody cares about. The one that has produced the most lulz is the English version.

RT is the only entity in the world that pretends to give a fuck about the death of a few filthy brown children

Erina Ade, deep,deep intellect

Viewerbase

RT is odd compared to other foreign news networks in that its viewership consists largely of young adult males and hipsterfags who think watching a state-funded news network is "alternative". They also have a major audience of conspiratards willing to believe anything that goes against the americunt government no matter how retarded. This is a blunder on the part of Putin's PR people as they have picked a demographic that is not only completely retarded and easily-influenced, but are unable to do jack shit.

Methods

Taking a page from Faux News, most on-air anchors are attractive young women, because propaganda is alright as long as it's being delivered with big tits.In an attempt to undermine the West at any given chance, RT takes the side of leftarded and social justice causes such as Occupy Wall Street and other Anonymous moralfaggotry.This is evident RT's apparent undying love of niggers.They were there,shitting on the police and anyone who didn't wish to be mauled/raped by a wild nigger every step of the way in the case of Trayvon Martin, Michael Brown and that one nigger whose death started the obnoxious #icantbreathe shit.RT, unlike virtually everyone else, does not consider the death of niggers to be a source of lulz,yet will take advantage of chimpouts in order to get a ratings boost.

Gallery of Attention Whores

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  If you're into that sort of thing
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  Even RT's best makeup and lighting couldn't hide the fugly
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  Because working as newsgirl for fucking ESPN Singapore qualifies you to talk about finance
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  Dat cleavage
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  Also, cleavage

Abby Martin deserves her own gallery

The legs of Abby Martin About missing Pics

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  Commie.Bitch.
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  Open for business
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  A nose ring is fine too

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

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  Hoe earrings
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Ukrainian Chimpout

In fall 2013,Ukrainian president and shameless Russian cocksucker Viktor Yanukovich attempted to make some sort of trade deal with Russia, the Ukrainians, having a massive sense of USI despite being illiterate backwoods slavshits,decided they would like to join the EU instead.After all, who doesn't want the infestation of Muslim immigrants and delightfully high taxes the other EU countries enjoy? Russia lost it's shit when Yanukovich was kicked out and it has become RT's main mission since then to portray the current Ukrainian government either as a bunch of fucking Nazis or the bitches of the EU and U.S. Holy shit,RT's right! It's the U.S.!

RT anchor drama

Azn news anchor emoquits live

Abby Martin and TOW

	“	This is not about ego guys, I really don't care if I'm on Wikipedia or not	„
	—Abby Martin crying about not being on Wikipedia

The Arab Spring

During the Arab Spring, Russia Today did all it could do to stop it, calling Libyans terrorists,saying that the war in Syria never actually happened,and BAWWWWING that if the revolution won, the world would enter a nuclear war.

Shit they said in Syria

	“	Its dangerous for the kids to learn because its cold now in syria	„
	—RT, On why Syria is such a mess now

According to RT, the people did not revolt in Syria and are just feeling cold. That's why thousands of people died, because they were cold, and any shooting that happens in there, it's just some drunks fighting or something and there is no huge scale war.

Gallery

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See also

• Russia- the glorious motherland
• Putin-Constant dicksucking
• Old Media
• MH17-Ukraine's fault
• South Ossetia
• Russian Wikipedia
• Paultard -The hipsters who think watching RT makes them cool.
• Ukraine-Fucking Nazis

External Links

• Top 100 lies made by RT
• ED mention

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Featured article January 12th & 13th, 2015
Preceded by Onideus Mad Hatter	Russia Today	Succeeded by Laurelai