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Dexter

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Dexter is a story about a serial killer in Miami named Dexter Morgan. By day he's a blood splatter analyst who works for the cops of Miami. However, much like every other superhero he goes out to stalk/kill criminals. He does this by monologue and thrusting deep into their body with his long hard blade.

The face of a pretty cool guy
No, not that Dexter

His mother got pwnt with a chainsaw in front of him and his brother Brian, causing them to be traumatized for life. However, stereotype cop Harry had trolls remorse because it was his fault Dexter's mom died so he adopted him and realised he was a sick fuck. After Harry dies, dexter gets sad for aproximately 10 seconds, but gets over it quick because his sister is alive and he has a girlfriend that makes him food and has little children to distract him with. Long story short, he kills criminals because he can.

Dexter's hot girlfriend. Don't like?

Season 1

It all starts with Dexter killing people and trying to find this other serial killer is also a pretty cool guy, talks with fellow cops (who are mostly spics because it's Miami.) gets accused of beign a sick fuck by a nigger cop, monologues and kills random ass criminals for 20 episodes while trying to fight his homosexuality enough to fuck his girlfriend and play with her kids. It turns out his brother is actually the other serial killer and offers Dexter to join him and be killers but Dexter says no and pwns him, which makes no fucking sense.

Season 2

Secret's out and lots of dead bodies are found. A FBI agent is called in and wants to hit Dexter's sister, Dexter wants the same. This makes our hero very jealous. His girlfriend thinks he's chasing the dragon so she sends him to rehab. In rehab he meets a woman who has da hots for him, but instead of getting it on with her he dumps her, making her stalk him. A black cop finds out Dexter is the bad guy, and tries to stop him, because Dexter realises he is a sick fuck, he agrees, but the cop is later killed by the crazy stalker ex, who is then killed by Dexter. The black cop gets blamed for the crime, but that's ok since he was a lazy nigger anyway.

Season 3

Lots of filler, the highlight of the season is when Dexter gets a spick (It's spic, retard) sidekick and tries to teach him things, but then the spic starts acting retarded and so Dexter decides to kill his ass, but the spic tries to kill him back, but then he fails and is killed like he should have been the moment he illegally entered the country.

Season 4

Even more filler, also Dexter's baby is demented, and the guy he kills at the end killed his wife, lulz.

Season 5

It all gets interesting when a group of men raep loads of womens, and some sick fucks at the FBI watch videos of them being tortured and raped. Dexter also begins to fuck one of the victims, while getting pissed off at some bible bashing babysitter. This series conludes with his sister almost finding him and not liking him anymore, but then she decides she doesnt care who the killer actually is.

other

Humble begginnings

Now this is the story all about how 
My life got flipped, turned upside down
An I'd like to take a minute just sit right there
I'll tell you how i became The Bay Harbor Butcher

Somewhere in florida born and raised 
killing animals's how i spent most my days 
chilling out maxing relaxing killing a duck
till my dad harry noticed that i was a sick fuck
and started teaching me this code of rules
i killed one little crook and my dad got scared 
and said oh lawds ima have a big heart attack

I whistled for a cab and when it came near the 
license plate said blood and had a knife in the mirror
if anything i thought that this cab was kool
so fuck it i said take me to a medical school

After learning how to cut i realised that
i should work for the police instead of being a doc
looked at my life and realised i was there
to kill every fucker until noone was left

See also

 

Dexter is part of a series on

Television

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