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Happy Wheels

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At the menu screen, you are greeted by a greedy Fem-Jew
Final boss of Happy wheels

Happy Wheels is a singleplayer racing game made in flash, created by Jim Bonacci. Notable for it's unique gameplay, superb gibbing system, and and ability to create humorous situations. It's yet another instance of an obscure game instantly becoming popular upon being mentioned by someone who is moderately well-known, in this case Adam Kovic, or even worse, UberHaxorNova. It is decent as a timewaster, but not deserving of the 50 page threads it has spawned in a number of gaming forums. 99.9% of the user generated content is people opening the map editor and raping the keyboard, with the final end result being a mass of random blue blocks and cool things.

The Game

The goal of Happy Wheels is simple: get to the finish alive. You are permitted to lose any nonessential body parts and even your vehicle, as long as you are not killed in the process. A wide variety of deadly obstacles can be found along the way, from everyday deathtraps like spike pits or landmines, to more unconventional things like a giant shotgun or satan's mouth. Most people ignore the goal and simply try to get their character killed in funny ways. The controls are fairly standard, with the exception of the ability to let go of the vehicle and subsequently flail around on the floor like a paraplegic child fallen out of it's Wheelchair. If you join and log in to the website, you can save replays of your runs for other people to see and rate. The most popular maps in Happy Wheels typically involve falling off ledges, running away from a large moving object, or sitting inside a special vehicle designed to travel down a pre-set path while getting bombarded by wrecking balls.

Level Editor

Happy Wheels' level editor primarily uses geometric shapes for construction. These shapes can act as a foundation, physics objects, part of a series of moving shapes, or a combination of the aforementioned things. Shapes can be connected by joints, which can either move freely or rotate automatically. Most of the other things are what you'd expect to find in a racing game, boosters, finish lines, spikes, etc. Most map-makers for Happy Wheels are autistic basement dwellers with the attention span of a goldfish, so expect most of the user-submitted levels range to be extremely boring and predictable with text plastered all over the level saying "PLZ RATE 5" and sometimes going as far to give out their Facebook and Twitter accounts because they think they have 'fans'. But to be fair, it's better than the level editors in many retail games

Commentaries

With the creation of Happy Wheels, came the onslaught of unfunny commentaries, the most popular being UberHaxorNova whose voice sounds like there's a penis shoved in his nose and throat, after 6 months of this, he managed to voice Pogostick Man after talking with Jim Bonacci. Once UberHaxorNova's Happy Wheels videos became popular, Dane Boe who was the sick fuck that created The Annoying Orange, jumped on the bandwagon and started his own Happy Wheels commentary on his gaming channel which is full of humorous, original content. Lastly, a Swedish gentleman who goes by the name 'PewDiePie' whom has an unnatural obsession with 'Bros' started his Happy Wheels commentary, the only difference to the others being that he pretends to be the Father and the Little Boy whilst he is playing the game.

Massive levels of unfunniness are coming from this video.

Dane Boe, who is too much of a fucking idiot to find the full game.

It's like UberHaxorNova, but in a Swedish accent!

Characters

I WARNED YOU ABOUT THOSE STAIRS BRO

Happy Wheels currently has 9 playable characters (11 if you count the son and girlfriend). Each one rides a different kind of vehicle and has up to two riders. There is some variation in how they control, but they are all easy to figure out. Details on each character are listed below.

  • Segway guy - A suited man on a segway. There is little else that can be said about him, he has no gimmick to speak of. In spite of this, Segway Guy is played fairly frequently.
  • Effective Shopper - A fatass riding in a powered shopping cart full of groceries. Tends to either be the easiest or hardest character to play as depending on the map, due to the size of both the character and the vehicle.
  • Lawnmower Man - With the obesity of Effective Shopper, the jump of Segway Guy, and the age of Wheelchair Guy, the Lawnmower Man is the second addition to the Happy Wheels team. He features a lawnmower with spinning blades with which to destroy anything he rides over. Unfortunately, it is just for show, as they do absolutely nothing. He also has the unique feature of being the only black man in the game so far. Common sightings are chomping down on the watermelons and raping the white wimmin with 7 foot spears.
  • Pogo Stick Man - He has a fucking pogo stick. Only redeeming ability about this guy is the fact he can crush skulls with his pogo stick ,it's entertaining to flip around like a motherfucker while crushing skulls at the same time, DID I MENTION HE HAS A MOTHERFUCKING POGO STICK!?

Gameplay

Tl;dw, people die.

And again.

HOLY SHIT! GABE NEWELL IS IN THIS ONE!

See also:

External Links

Happy Wheels is part of a series on

Gaming

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