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Blockland
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YOU ARE NOT IMPORTANT. DON'T ADD YOURSELF TO THE ARTICLE. NOBODY CARES. |
A successful attempt at creating something with even worse graphics than Minecraft, Blockland is a high-quality FPS made by some hardworking developer known as Badspot. In Blockland, a player can hang out and build cool things with awesome features! Sadly, it is instead another game that tries to replicate Legos making it somewhat the most inferior Lego sim in the universe, but unsurprisingly equally shitty. The only lulz in Blockland is the constant arguing and battles between another useless game known as Roblox and themselves, which ends up in IRL wars and dramas between special needs children. The only use for Blockland is for keeping the autistic kids in games instead of letting them lurk IRL.
Blockland Forums
The forum consists mainly of children under the age of 14, like in the game. The forum has slowly degenerated into a /b/oard, with retards making an appearance in almost every thread. The forum is run by Badspot, aka 29-year-old Eric Hartman, your average virgin basement-dweller.
Some Blockland players are Macfags and still can't get the game to work, which is strange because "Macs just work." Blockland only works on the latest version of Mac OSX too, so older OSX versions can't even run the game resulting in whiny 12-year-olds who can't get their parents to dish out $20 for an Apple Software Upgrade.
The forum has a drama section for retards to bawww about their fellow 11 year old players and to spark flame wars with other players who made them butthurt. When they aren't flaming each other, they're talking about the creator's penis and how they would suck it right off of him. Srsly.
The forum has a gallery for the terrible creations made by the newfag players of the game. To protect their feelings, Badspot enforced a rule where any negative comments about their pixelated, untextured shit will get that person banned.
Gameplay
Blockland is a multiplayer game, most servers being roleplay servers, since building things out of massive Legos is so like IRL. The kiddies on the game have so little fun from building things it usually ends up in them ragequitting from working too hard. That's right, the game's player audience is mostly underage B& making the experience so much more enjoyable. The build servers are usually full of 14-year-olds building penises or naked anime characters.
An easy way to troll is to gain administration privileges, usually just by being nice to the owner and complimenting him frequently. Once you're an admin, Permaban everyone when the owner of the server or the other administrators aren't there. If you do this professionally, you will obtain an excessive amount of lulz and might be able to get a drama topic shitloads of pages long.
Notice how all the characters have no legs at all. This was the creator's attempt at making the game original, by making players into cripples.
Servers
There are around 220 servers for this extreme video game, with a wide selection of interesting game modes to keep you occupied. Most of them are roleplay servers, though the people who can actually afford a good computer may rarely host something somewhat fun.
Gamemodes
- Family RP, where the lonely hang out and pretend to be a mother, father, uncle, etc, much like babyfurs do with their so-called families (though without the incest yiff) just because they got disowned from their family IRL.
- Jail RP is a team deathmatch-based minigame where guards must let prisoners out of their cells without letting them escape or get weapons. The minigame is popular with the cocksuckers who bought this shit, since it's the only game mode where you actually have to use strategy.
- City RP is where players have to get a job and build shit to survive. Most of the time, it's just idiots killing each other and ragequitting.
The servers on which the game runs on are owned by kids whose unfortunate parents don't secure their PayPal details. End result, even more cancer is to hit the Interbutts.
Older Versions
Once in a time long past, A busy Badspot was working on the prototype of what would come to be known as Blockland. After countless hours of work, it was finally released in November of that same year. Eventually, it got a lot of players who proceeded to modify the game extensively. There were many modifications to the alpha Blockland, and the most popular one being Return to Blockland, which added many necessities and filler content. The most popular feature was the Editor Wand which modifies the size and angle of bricks. RTB used to have a large community of members, but after the finished product was released, the community started to dissolve. Eventually, an E-Lawyer by the name of Vyper144 came along and made his own forums for the game. It lasted from 2007 to 2008 before dying. He attempted to get more cash by telling his 200 member community that they're retarded and expected people to give him money. The domain went out as of 2009, but was later replaced with another forum called "AndoRTB". The sad thing is 99.9 of the posts rest in the "Off-Topic" section, just like on the actual forums. It was fun having plastic orgies, though. Feeling lucky? Play it then! Have fun playing online.
Another version is called TBM (The Better Mod), made by a group of basement dwellers. All later mods were made by 14 year olds script kiddies fags who stole code and content from RTB, SFM, AIO, Retail and every other BL game. The only thing that separates it is the i-gob which lets you save bricks and load them on any other server. The community still exists, but it's mainly full of furfags who can't afford 20 bucks to buy the actual game. The community has made plenty of mods such as DTB, TOB, and TBG. Back in 2005, it was discovered that TBM fucked up any directory that had it and AIO. In retaliation, Badspot decided to manipulate most of his minions into keeping people from playing TBM.
Also, a project that was going on since 2005 called "The Better Game" was supposed to compete with Retail. When Retail eventually came out, the project was canned until sometime in 2009, Cyberprime and some other skidfags decided they'd work on it. So far they have been able to manage their own minifig model, and a start menu! Previously, they have been attempting to get their hands on Torque 3D which was cut from $1500 to only $99! lol
Drama
The lifeline of the Blockland forums revolves around the Drama Section. The Drama Section is the third most popular board in Blockland's forums, aside from Off-Topic and Games, proving that Blockland players are about three times more interested in anything not related to Blockland. It is also the forum with the highest Reply-to-Thread Ratio, indicating that anything posted here will undoubtedly result in at least 10 pages of idiots bickering with each other over trivial shit nobody cares about.
Drama made in Blockland is usually so stale and lifeless that even the assholes that inhabit the forums have trouble making a big deal about it. This phenomenon is so problematic that Badspot made it a Bannable Offense to make a comment about how you don't care. Regardless of how prominent this rule is (having a sticky thread all to its self), most drama is so terrible this rule has claimed many victims who could not restrain themselves from posting a yawn. The people that create the majority of threads are those with an unwarranted sense of self importance bitching about abstract ideas and forum trends that literally could not be less important if it did not exist at all.
Regardless of how uninteresting the average thread is, with a community as hostile and immature as Blockland's, more than a few people have gone down in flames so bright they deserve to have their failures to be cataloged here for all eternity.
Robo and Slick
Attention whore Jimmg posted a topic about Slicksilver banning his bro RoboNoob after he forgot to pay him for the whore he bought. The topic unfolded in a mass of fake suicide, nudes being spread, and fun times.
Zoneark and Truce: Skiddie Trolls
Truce made a client script that gave him direct console access on servers. He and Zoneark did this just to clear some bricks, ban random people, and otherwise cause chaos "for luls". Badspot finally caught on and demanded they tell him what is the cause of this. Zoneark blamed it on Iban's zombie mod, which Badspot was quick to judge as complete shit and instead targeted McTwist's RP Core mod as the source. Zoneark, Truce, and Only1Rebel (whom had not appeared in either the forums or game for over a year), along with three other "unknown" users, had their keys de-activated. This has been going on for two whole weeks before Badspot even took action. Many butthurt players ragequitted from Blockland because their shit that they spent hours on was deleted forever.
.Aeris.: Smalltime Gambler
Recently, another challenger appeared to the throne of spreading nudes on Blockland. Aeris spread dem titties to her 'friends' on the forums, and Jimmg, of Robo and Slick fame, caught on, which led to more drama and arguing. Then Aeris was promptly banned after breaking a rule by claiming she had better things to do than argue on a forum. Three days later, she was unbanned. Small arguments between her and other members of the community continue to happen sporadically.
Despite several warning from more caring members of the community, .Aeris. has made several efforts to add to this article and show the basement dwelling peasants of Encyclopedia Dramatica that is she is actually just a defenseless young girl that has never done anything wrong, ever, and everyone who does not like her just spontaneously decided to do so (probably because she is so super cute and they are jealous because they don't have a girlfriend). Her revisions include revising this subsection to reflect better on her and more poorly on the rest of the community, and adding an aside under the below picture demanding that ED find the pictures of her naked. She also registered another account and tried to add a piece about Jimmg (the person who pointed out how many nude pictures she had given out). Unfortunately for her, these revisions were undone by SysOps, meaning that the bullshit she tried to add was so flagrantly retarded that people whom have never played Blockland and were not involved in the incident could clearly see what a crock of shit it was.
Recently, .Aeris. took a fucking hint and had one of the prepubescent boys she gave nudes to post that she is leaving. This is probably a sincere notice letting her friends know that she will no longer be active in the forums and it is very unlikely that she is doing this for attention.
In a chat with Visage, .Aeris. revealed that she was a spy part of a group of /b/tards on Blockland to troll and take over Blockland. If all of these /b/tards are as successful as her, the forums should be under their control by next week
—Aeris being the mad attention whore she is. | ||
MegaScience: Savior of Women
Over the course of a few days the user MegaScience tried to secretly vandalize this article because he came across a half-nude pic of a girl he loves. Now, knowing Megascience and WhiteKnights, once they don't get their way they go and cry about it, such as he did over at Blockland's forums.
According to Blockland's own community, MegaScience is known for being the biggest suckup to females on the site. Whenever you can, please remind him that he'll never get laid and removing pictures of his many girly friends will take him even further away from any china he'll ever know.
Let's not forget how much he'll ask you to add him on various IMs if you somewhat agree with him on something. Status = Forever Alone.
MegaScience Words of Wisdom
—MegaScience, admitting to his blatant faggotry | ||
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Lørd Tøny
Lørd Tøny is a typical Brony who likes to jerk it to fat ponies and bestiality (Or at least this is what he wants you to think.)
In truth Tony (Not even his real name) is a 21 year old lonely basement dweller second floor dweller who lives with his parents and attempts to troll people all day rather then getting off his lazy ass and getting a job.
Some of Tony's glorious trolling.
Lord Tony: There's a snake in my ass. Zookuw: wat Zookuw: And you complain about figurines Lord Tony: there's a pony dick in my ass Zookuw: Why do you like that sort of thing tony? Lord Tony: I shove pony dols in my butt Lord Tony: show the world Lord Tony: of my sick doll fetish Zookuw: Also your piss fetish? Lord Tony: I pee on dolls Zookuw: Of course you do tony of course you do Lord Tony: I have sex with dead pony dolls
- User:Lord_Tony Tony's ED account.
Furries
Very rarely does a community have all negative traits, but Blockland strives for perfection. One of the most agonizing traits of Blockland's community is its tolerance to Furries. Even Roblox has a rule against anything related to the fandom, including user-made cat ears and other gay accessories. Even though the founder and only admin of the board appears to be anti-furry, he is too fucking lazy to do anything about it. Despite how most of the community doesn't even want the furries to stay there, they willingly prance around with avatars cut from hentai and signatures with nothing but soft-core porn in a mild, yet effective, effort at trolling the entire user base.
Badspot's "Secret" Website
The users of Blockland forums accidentally discovered Badspot's alternate website, thus they started a thread about it on the forums. This topic started out nicely just showing everyone that their favorite games developer is actually a sick fuck by linking them to his personal cartoon porn website, which was full of sex "transformation" animations, and comics. In retaliation Baddy decided to DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING and the poster was banned for 2 weeks.
This was an example of overreacting as the website was never deleted - it was just moved somewhere else. You can find it here.
Unfortunately, all of the comics look the same, or feature shitty attempts at "Art". Poor fag never got laid.
*The original thread before it got moved
Trolling
Trolling these young studs is as easy as pouring a drink, all you have to do is either make a hello topic and they'll start trying to guess if you're an alternate account or not; The other way is to go into one of the many various add-on topics and tell the maker how much he sucks at making them, or you could make a huge Goatse macro and start a server like we did so it shows up on the main site.
Random players will spam your server 95% of the time. They do this for a chance of crashing the server so they can gain e-peen. An average server can only handle up to 20,000 bricks with out lagging/crashing.
Machinimas
As with any shitty hyped-up game, there are Machinimas for Blockland. Putting Machinima and Blockland together is like combining kids with Fraps and unfunny. End result - a movie with almost pointless plots and adultish voices, e.g. 10-year-olds speaking through tissues. Srsly.
There's a dedicated channel for this shit.
Blockland players on this article
When Blockland forum-goers found this ED article, some fag named Ninja Guy made a topic and it resulted in a lollercoaster of accusations. Players eager to defend the powerful graphics and gameplay of Blockland created accounts to blank the page backed up by the white knighting of HoudiniGal.
People who have blanked this article include:
- User:EvilJebus - Replaced with "I am 12 years old and what is this"
- User:AlphaX100 - Removed every section one by one.
- User:China Wolbert - Replaced the article with crap but was reverted by MysteryBot immediately.
- User:MetalBL - Pulling yet even moar whiteknightism.
- User:.Aeris. - Didn't like the fact that she was pwned by the community she was in.
- User:MegaScience - Repeatedly attempted to get a pic down through trying to mask his edits, forgetting that Blockland members seem to love ED (and furthermore, hate him).
- MegaScience's sock.
—SeventhSandwich, because all games are terrible. | ||
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See also
External links
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Blockland is part of a series on Visit the Gaming Portal for complete coverage. |
